Bryce Crawford (1:44)

America we're going on tour this 2026. We're bringing the I Heart Jesus Live Podcast Tour to over 22 cities across America. We're getting in a bus for over a month and traveling the country believing God to miraculously move in each city city in such a specific way. And there's no better way to start your 2026 than to worship with other fellow believers. So make sure to secure your seats. Go to jesonthestreet.org tour get your tickets, save your seats, bring your friends and we'll see you guys in 2026 for the I Heart Jesus Live Podcast tour. What's going on, guys. Welcome back to another episode of the Bryce Crawford Podcast. I'm Bryce, and I'm grinning right now when I'm doing the intro because I'm with my. My pops, my mentor, one of, if not my best friend, Marcus McFallen, my dog, man.

Marcus McFallen (2:28)

I. I love you, man.

Bryce Crawford (2:30)

I love you.

Marcus McFallen (2:30)

I love you, man. Just. It's an absolute honor to be here, bro. It really is.

Bryce Crawford (2:35)

Well, thanks for coming back on. Second time. This is the first time you guys are seeing it. And the reason why we're re recording it is because I found out some new details about Marcus's story that I had no idea about. And I wanted us to go into the nitty gritty on it. I think what God's done and is doing in Marcus's life is impactful and has impacted me. I traveled with Marcus for about a year when I was 19.

Marcus McFallen (3:00)

19.

Bryce Crawford (3:01)

19, yeah. So I sat under Marcus, traveled with him for a year, and we were just preaching in the street. Marcus was preaching everywhere. Everywhere. And it was fun.

Marcus McFallen (3:11)

So, man, Mexico, in and out, man, New York, Amish, like, just wild stuff.

Bryce Crawford (3:20)

We did really go everywhere. We went to the Amish country. We went to in n Out. We went to rehab.

Marcus McFallen (3:27)

Rehab, man. Rehab.

Bryce Crawford (3:29)

Rehab.

Marcus McFallen (3:29)

Where you said you'd stay awake with me as I had to drive eight hours. And, you know, I got pictures of you just knocked out in the back. But I think what I love about just especially that season is the purity of that season and how fun it was and how you really were about that life long before what people see you doing now. Like, you were really about that life all the way to the point where we would have to catch flights early in the morning and we're at an in and out and you're just preaching the gospel to seeks and like, just whoever was there, you were just really living that life. And I've always appreciated that about you, that you really were the real deal before a lot of the stuff that people see you doing today.

Bryce Crawford (4:06)

Oh, well, thank you. I appreciate that. That's encouraging. And I would. I wouldn't. And I think this is important before we dive into Marcus's story. Like, it's Malachi 4, 6.

Marcus McFallen (4:15)

Yeah. Come on.

Bryce Crawford (4:16)

The hearts of fathers turn back to sons, and the hearts of sons turn back to fathers. Like, something that really empowered me and encouraged me was having a father behind me that wasn't like compromising when I mess up, but could call me out, but could still be a father. And I feel like for our generation, if you're someone older watching and listening to this, like, we need more fathers and mothers coming behind our generation so that we can feel empowered and encouraged to walk out the call that God has had on our life. So I wouldn't have been able to do any of that without your encouragement and support.

Marcus McFallen (4:48)

Well, I appreciate you saying that, man, but what I've learned, you know, when you. When you study out the scriptures and you look at how they would tear the ground up until the ground ready for, you know, season be planted into it, you would have an older oxen and a younger oxen. The older oxen represented strength, and the younger oxen represented. Or the older oxen was wisdom, and the younger oxen would represent strength. And that's you co labor and do it together. And it. It's been a joy being able to partner with the zeal of the next generation. But like you just said, man, I. Moms and dads, we got to be able to get in the trenches with them, so.

Bryce Crawford (5:19)

Amen.

Marcus McFallen (5:19)

Come on.

Bryce Crawford (5:20)

Well, I want for people that don't know you, give, like, a quick background before we dive in, a story.

Marcus McFallen (5:27)

Yeah. Yeah, man. From Seaside, California, born and raised. Grew up in. In Cali. Just a little bit about before we kind of dig into the story, just a kid who grew up. Dad left before I was born, so identity crisis, early age. But play football. Was pretty good at sports and opened a lot of doors for me. Played pro ball, got strung out. Just wild, wild, a wild journey. But I encountered the Lord in a way that transformed my life forever.

Bryce Crawford (5:54)

What position did you play in football?

Marcus McFallen (5:55)

Come on, somebody. I always ask people, what does it look like? I played. I played. You know, whenever he would ask me that, I would say athlete, you know? You know what I'm saying? What position? I could play every position if you need me to, but I play running back.

Bryce Crawford (6:07)

Let's go.

Marcus McFallen (6:08)

Come on. Run to him. I run through him, was the motto.

Bryce Crawford (6:10)

There's this picture of Marcus at the NFL combine that, like, is so funny in the.

Marcus McFallen (6:15)

In the.

Bryce Crawford (6:15)

Like, in the last spandex, everything. It's so funny.

Marcus McFallen (6:19)

Come on. But. So you.

Bryce Crawford (6:22)

You play football in high school, really good athlete. Do you feel like you were running from stuff in sports?

Marcus McFallen (6:26)

Oh, man. So just really to get into the. The heart of it, I. I feel like I was running my entire life because I was in a home where me and my brothers and sisters all had different dads. We all got different last names, and so there's just so much chaos, and I didn't want to be home because the reality is, oftentimes home represented a lot of pain, abuse, frustration, setback. There would be times we wouldn't have running water or electricity. And so I was always running. I felt like I was always trying to escape to something else. And I absolutely. I did that for a long time.

Bryce Crawford (7:01)

Yeah. Were you. Were you ever embarrassed of, like, living that life, or were. Was it just more of something that you were trying to ignore?

Marcus McFallen (7:08)

I remember my eighth grade, I started playing football, and I was a pretty good athlete. And I remember. I'll never forget this day. It was Pop Warner football, and it was picture day, and our water was turned off for that day. And I remember everybody, you know, wearing their uniform for picture day were excited. And I remember I had dirty clothes on. My. My game pants were dirty, my jersey was dirty. And you could see me in the picture. I was crying because kids had made fun of me because I didn't have clean clothes on. And I just remember just always being embarrassed about the situation. And, you know, I had a stepdad, but he was sick, and he was sick and dying pretty much my entire life. And so I remember just being embarrassed about my situation because people would know I would go to stores and steal food, and, you know, I had to do what I had to do to survive, and that was just kind of the way of life. And I was absolutely embarrassed because I didn't. You don't know you're poor until you get around people that have, like, food in their fridge. And we just didn't have it like that. And, yeah, I was definitely embarrassed.

Bryce Crawford (8:09)

And so then high school came around, and you just were going hard at football.

Marcus McFallen (8:13)

Yeah. Like I said, I would take that anger out because I was. I was. I was a socially awkward kid. I didn't know how to have conversations because growing up, man, to be really honest, our mom, she didn't know how to love her kids well, meaning me and my older brother, before my younger brother and younger sister came around, we would have to sit at the foot of her bed, crisscross applesauce, watching her television shows. We didn't have, like, this normal childhood. And so as I'm growing up in that situation, I just didn't understand, like, why the things were happening to me the way that they were. And just for the sake of, like. Like vulnerability and honesty. I could remember growing up at times and being tied behind my back and having my feet tied, just being beat. And. And. And I know my mom, she was. She was doing the best that she could. She was loving the best that she could, but she didn't love well and she came from a, you know, system of abuse. And so only thing I wanted to do was just escape that. And so football for me was my escape. I could take my pain out on other people and it was the one sport I could hit people and not get in trouble for it. So I'm like, bet my model was run to him and run through them. My coaches used to get so mad because I would have a breakaway touchdown and if I saw somebody coming, I would intentionally try to run that person over because I had that aggression. Like I was a bruiser, you know, boy was a big back back in the day. And it just opened a lot of doors for me. My first scholarship offer came from San Diego State my freshman year. Like I'm 13 years old and for those people who listen to this and they ran track and field, I was running 11, one in the 100 as a freshman. Like I could move and I was £200. So I was big, fast and strong. But I had a lot of anger on the inside and I was just.

Bryce Crawford (9:50)

Running away from stuff as the years went by, like sophomore, junior, senior, you were getting offers from.

Marcus McFallen (9:55)

Oh man, I was getting offers from everywhere. I would have coaches come, they would, you know, they would come and watch me practice and I would. By my senior year, I'm a top prospect now. I'm averaging 10 yards of carry. I'm running a 10, 8 and 100. Like I'm, I'm a big, fast, strong running back. And I remember Tyrone Willingham, he was a coach at University of Washington. And I, I remember my coach invited me into his office and they offered me a scholarship. And coach, you know, his name was Coach Noble, they asked to send over my transcripts. What little people don't know. And it's interesting, I went to an all black school the first two years and then I transferred to an all Caucasian school. And so I wanted to put myself in position to make it out of the hood. I was like, yo, whatever I have to do to get out of the situation that I'm in, I'm going to do it. And I remember Coach Tyrone Willingham was on the line and Coach Noble sent my transcripts over. And I will never forget to the day that I die how hard Coach Tyrone Willingham laughed looking at my transcripts because my grades were so terrible. And I thought that if I scored touchdowns, if I did well, if I ran fast and it would open a lot of doors for me. But boy, was I wrong. And I Committed to University of Arizona. So I said, okay, well I'm going to go to University of Arizona. And what they were trying to do is this thing called Prop 48. They were trying to just get me a high school diploma so that I can get into the university. But unfortunately my grades were so bad that I didn't graduate from high school.

Bryce Crawford (11:13)

Do you know what GPA you had?

Marcus McFallen (11:16)

Yes.

Bryce Crawford (11:16)

What GP?

Marcus McFallen (11:17)

What? It was not high. It was, I think Michael 1.2. Wow. Just. And I remember it's crazy because my entire life, school was never an emphasis. I come my family, that wasn't an emphasis. Inside of the home, survival was. And so I wasn't worried about algebra. I'm worrying about eating and making sure that we don't get shot. And you know, I grew up in a situation where my family was involved in a lot of gang and drug activity. So my home being raided by the DEA was a normal occurrence. In our house. I've been held at gunpoint more times than, than I even want to say. And so I was just trying to survive. And so I didn't care about school. And it opened a lot of doors for me.

Bryce Crawford (11:55)

I feel like, I feel like what you said about the sports, like how you, you were doing, how you cared only about football because that was like a strength and you didn't care about, you didn't care about school. I feel like that there's a lot of people that kind of do that. They like expect their talent. Like I'm not even trying to be like some cringe, like a hard work beats talent. When talent fails to work hard, you know, it's like, oh my gosh, it's so cringe. But there's like kind of. But then there's like truth to it because it's like, it's like a lot of truth. You were obviously talented, getting offers. But then when it came down, like they couldn't even get you just a high school diploma, like you needed to have some sort of effort towards your grades.

Marcus McFallen (12:35)

Well, there's a story even behind that because the reason why I transferred with such bad grades, I went to an all black school. And they would do these things called contracts back in the day, as long as probably when you were born, literally 2002, 2001, like crazy I'm getting up there in age. But they would do these things called contracts, meaning if you didn't have the grades your first semester, you'd write a contract basically like promising to get your grades up so that you can be eligible to keep playing. Well, when I transferred to our rival school, they doctored my transcript, so I transferred with straight Fs. For two years, I had straight Fs. And so I'm trying to make up all those grades so that I can graduate on time, and I just couldn't. You know, I remember waking up the morning of the sat. I laughed. I'm like. I could barely formulate a sentence at 17 years old. I'm like, I'm not going to pass this test. And yet my athletic ability opened a lot of doors, but I needed to have something else that can actually help me walk through the doors, and I didn't have that. Dang.

Bryce Crawford (13:30)

So you committed to University of Arizona?

Marcus McFallen (13:32)

Yeah. Oh, yeah. And U of A. Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (13:34)

How did that go?

Marcus McFallen (13:35)

You couldn't? Well, I couldn't. Well, because they needed me to graduate. I had to get a diploma, and I couldn't get a diploma, so I had to go to the junior. The junior college route. And I remember being, you know, in our area. I was the best athlete to come out of our area in a while.

Bryce Crawford (13:46)

So you didn't graduate?

Marcus McFallen (13:47)

I didn't graduate high school. How did you.

Bryce Crawford (13:49)

Wait, how does that. I'm serious. How does that work? How are you able to go to, like, junior college?

Marcus McFallen (13:53)

For sure. Yeah, we Putting it out there, man. So being a good athlete back in the day still opened doors for you. So you could actually, back in those days, take junior college classes without actually having a high school diploma. Oh, wow. And so I would. I went to Sacramento City Junior College. Okay. And was a top junior college in terms of athletics. And I just had to do whatever I had to do to be eligible. And so I'm playing junior college football without a high school diploma, but I'm doing whatever I had to do to be eligible to play. And so I'm playing in juco, doing well. Nevada Reno offers me a scholarship. At the time, they had Colin Kaepernick as a quarterback. So I'm excited. I'm about to step into Division 1 athletics, but I needed to have the grades to become a qualifier. And unfortunately, I didn't have the grades to even be a qualifier. And so I'm sitting in our junior college library 20 years old, best shape of my life, just trying to decide what am I going to do with my life. My friend shows me this school called Malone College. I'm from California. I had never seen snow. I didn't know what Ohio was. I'm like, well. But there was something in me that knew. Once I saw the website, I knew that I was supposed to go to that school, and here's what I did. I said, all right, yo, can I get that coach's number? Because he probably wasn't trying to recruit an athlete like me, because Malone was a small. It was a small division school. And he gives me the coach's number. I call the coach. I say, yo, coach. Coach Garden, if you listen to this, you'll probably remember this conversation. I say, yo, Coach, if you don't know, you don't know who I am. But if you offer me a scholarship, it would be the best scholarship you've ever offered. Two weeks later, I was on scholarship playing football in Canton, Ohio. What's wild is they showed me the Pro Football hall of Fame stadium because that was the stadium we played in. They showed it to me, full of people, and I'm like, oh, bad. We move in like that. They didn't. I didn't realize they were actually showing me the hall of Fame game. Our first game, There was like 300 people in the stand, but I was on scholarship playing ball, and no one told me that Malone was a Christian school. So I'm like, oh, okay. So I got to learn about, like, God, whatever. And I had experiences with God. I went to Young Life as a kid because they had free food and, you know, girls were there. And so I. I went to Young Life and. And our mom tried to do her best to raise us in the church, but it was just a lot of spiritual manipulation. I. I didn't want anything to do with God because I looked at him through the lens and the earthly expression of my father. My dad was absent, so God's absent, so I don't want anything to do with him. Well, Malone, I had to take all the Bible classes. Hermeneutics, homiletics, theology, New Testament, Old Testament. And I learned about this concept of who God was. But my entire. My entire thing at Malone was play well so that you can get into the NFL. My senior year, I did really well. I finished top 10 in the country in rushing, and I get a chance to work out in front of all 32 NFL teams, which. Wildest experience of my life, bro. 20. Just imagine being an inner city kid whose dad wasn't there, who. You know how they say so many people told me I would never amount to anything. I've got this chip on my shoulder. I'm trying to prove everybody wrong. I'm trying to show them that, man, I'm actually going to make something of myself. Because the one thing that you don't want to hear or I'm from is you're going to be just like yo daddy. I didn't want to hear that. I was proving everyone wrong. And I'm at this combine, I'm working out in front of all these NFL scouts. And like I said, I had spandex on. Your boy was in shape. And I remember they. They make you do this thing where you have to take this thing called the Wonderlic test. Shout out to all the athletes that take the Wonderlic test and do well. I didn't put an emphasis on education. I was, like, just struggling. Like, they would ask you some of the craziest abstract questions, and then they'd make you wear spandex. And you step on a scale, and you step in front of all these people, all these scouts, and they're looking at your physique. And I step up on this scale, and I look to my right and I see a bunch of scouts from the Pittsburgh Steelers, and I'm like, oh, my goodness, I'm here. This is about to happen. And I perform really well. The Dallas Cowboys suggested that I move to fullback. I'm like, listen, whatever you want me to do, I'm down to do it. And so I said, I'll be a water boy as long as you gonna pay me. And so I moved to fullback. And I performed really well. Ran a four or five at the combine. Just, I was in good shape. I was £257. Like, you don't have, you know, normally guys of that size running that fast. And all this time, I've got this, like, God thing concept in the back of my head. And that's why the scripture says they have an appearance of godliness but deny its power. I knew about God. I can actually speak Christianese with the best of them. But there was no heart transformation. There wasn't anything that. There was no fruit. And so I'm playing ball. Things are going well. I signed with this agency out of Indianapolis, Indianapolis Colts. Call my agents like, yo, if Marcus is around in the sixth round, we're going to pick him up. I'm hype. Dreams are about to come true. We're talking about at least $500,000 a year. Where I come from, money like that changes everything. And I grew up in a situation where everyone depended on Marcus to get our family out of the hood. And so I've got all this pressure, all this weight. And I remember watching the the NFL draft, and I'm just there, and all my friends are there, and it's hype. Nobody from alone history has ever been drafted. And so I'm excited because dreams are coming true. All the hard work is getting ready to pay off. And I'm looking at the screen, and I get a text from my agent. He says, marcus, your life's about to change forever. Every young kid, man, that's what we want to hear. That want to play pro sports. Because I was looking for somebody to accept me. I never felt accepted by my dad, so I was looking for someone to accept me. And in that round, with that pick, the Colts drafted somebody else. Dang. Felt broken. Like, I felt like I was worthless, that I wasn't good enough. Oakland Raiders called, wanted me to come and try out his tight end. I'm six foot one. The idea of blocking these monstrous defensive ends was terrifying. So I'm like, I'm not going to do that. Signed in the Arena Football League during that summer. As I'm training, I'm trying to navigate, what does God want from me? Like, I. I just always thought it was like a. A transactional relationship. And when I didn't get drafted, everything falls apart. My stepdad dies. My grandma dies. The girl that I was dating, my first girlfriend ever, she breaks up with me. I'm like, bro, what in the world am I supposed to do with my life? And I really wrestled with God that summer. And then I met this beautiful young lady. Her name was Chelsea. I slid into her dm. The. Listen, fellas, I'm about to help. Can I help the fellas out for a second? Help them out. Let me help y' all fellas out. So I remember seeing her in our cafeteria, and I'm like, man, she. She's different. She's beautiful. And this is the day and age in 2011 where everybody put their business on Facebook. And so she had put on her Facebook, she broke up with her boyfriend. Pray for her. So I'm like, oh, this is my shot. I slide into her dm. I'm like, here we go. And I knew that she was a pastor's kid. That's why I slid into her dm. I said, girl, I just want you to know I'm praying for you. Oh, snap.

Bryce Crawford (21:01)

That's some game, right?

Marcus McFallen (21:02)

Come on. If you pray, she will stay. She becomes my girl. She becomes my girlfriend. We're on this journey together, and she's with me. As I'm starting to play professional sports. I played for the San Antonio Towns and Arena Football League. Things are going great. Life is just all time high. I'm getting paid to play the game that I love. 2014, I get a chance to work off for some NFL scouts. Price. I was in the best shape of my life. I could bench 225, 34 times. Like, what was chisel crazy? I believe we serve a miracle working God. Do it again, Lord. I'm like, I'm in the best shape ever. And I'm working out for these teams and I'm, like, pumped because they're coming to check me out if I do well in this workout. This is February of 2020, 2014. I'm in the best shape of my life. If things go well, chances are I'm in the NFL. It was like a movie. I mean, I'm catching wheel routes, I'm breaking 50 yard touchdown runs, I'm blocking, I'm doing everything. I'm the only fullback on the roster. And then they had me go through some blocking drills. And up to this point, I've never smoked, didn't drink, none of that stuff. I was focused on the game because I realized that if I wanted to be the best, I had to make sure that I separated myself. So in this workout, man, I unfortunately blew my shoulder out, cracked my clavicle, tore my rotator cuff, tore my labrum, and in one play, my professional career was over. Talk about a wrestle. I had to wrestle with. Is God who he says he is? Like, all my dreams, everything that I was fighting for, I'm literally at the face of my dreams, and now I have to wrestle with, who is Marcus? Who is Marcus? Without the game that he gave so much time to. Dang.

Bryce Crawford (22:51)

So in that moment, you're trying out for the Cowboys, you blow your shoulder out, now you're broken.

Marcus McFallen (22:57)

Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (22:58)

Was there any part of you that thought, I can get back into this? Like, you're. You're still holding on to the identity in the game like you were, oh, big time.

Marcus McFallen (23:06)

So I refuse to accept what the doctors told me when I got out of surgery. I'm like, okay, I've had a lot of people count against me. I had a lot of people tell me I would never do what I'm doing today. So I. We moved to Houston. My wife and I, we get married. Chelsea and I would get married. We moved to Houston. I'm doing my training at the Ironman facility there. I'm just trying to get my shoulder back because in my mind, there's nothing else. There is no backup plan. It was the only thing that I had for my life. I said, I have. It's NFL or bus. There's nothing else. And I refuse to accept the fact that I could barely bench 135 pounds, let alone I'm not gonna be able to block a blitzing middle linebacker. And it hit me hard. But what made me feel good in those moments, man, were the pain medication that the doctors prescribed me.

Bryce Crawford (23:48)

Dang. So you hadn't done any drugs, any symptoms or Nothing?

Marcus McFallen (23:51)

Nothing.

Bryce Crawford (23:52)

And then you, you kind of just get your world rocked. I mean, you know when you're, when your eggs are in another basket other than Jesus, and then that thing crumbles because it's not eternal. It's not perfect perfect. It, it jacks you up.

Marcus McFallen (24:05)

Absolutely.

Bryce Crawford (24:06)

So you get, you get on the drugs and it was the only thing that made you feel good.

Marcus McFallen (24:09)

What?

Bryce Crawford (24:10)

And that, that came not from like, you know, buying off of somebody that.

Marcus McFallen (24:15)

Came from my name's run a pill bottle. So they gave me a fentanyl patch, instant release oxycodone and extended release morphine. They wanted me out of pain 24, 7. I didn't have cancer. Why do I have a fentanyl patch? But I, I'm not educated when it comes to drugs. Like, I stayed away from that stuff and they over prescribed me. And when you mix psychological depression with physical dependency, you are going to get a drug addict 10 out of 10 times. And that's exactly what happened with me. It was like the perfect, perfect storm to create an addict. And it started off just me taking it as prescribed, but naturally, as you take it more and more you become immune to it. And then you need to take more to get the same effects. And so now a month script, I'm going to through in two weeks. Yeah. And, and I didn't understand, I didn't really know like that I was an addict. I didn't understand that I was strung out. I just knew that I needed more to feel the same effects. And I remember one time I called the CDC because I could barely breathe because I had a fentanyl patch on and it was feeding me 25 micrograms every hour. And I just remember, I'm like, man, I. I feel like I'm about to die. And I called them, I'm like, I think I'm about to die. They told me to take the fentanyl patch off and then I would just take the instant release oxycodone because you can feel it faster. And I did that for 1173 days. Dang. Completely strung out. And it started off like as prescribed. But then when it wouldn't do what I needed it to do. I would start going and buying drugs off the streets.

Bryce Crawford (25:41)

And you were like, you weren't following Jesus. You were just wearing the label or where were you at?

Marcus McFallen (25:47)

I think I was. I think I was following him to the best of my ability, but I hadn't had an encounter with him that was genuine. I think I was doing the Christian thing. I was doing what Christians do. And most people probably would say, like, oh, Marcus was sold out for Jesus, but I was sold out for the concept of Jesus. I didn't know him as friend. I didn't know him as. As a personal Lord and Savior, because I had prayed the prayer, like, okay, like, all right, Romans 10. And I. Okay, I give you my heart. I confess that you're Lord. But there was really no fruit from my life because I did not know who I was. My foundation was not rooted in who Jesus says I am. And so I had this concept of who he was. And. But I had these two tensions going on. I was struggling as an addict, and I was isolated. And so I did not think that anyone would understand my drug addiction. I didn't think. And here's when I knew that I was an addict. This is fall of 2026. I'm a couple years in 2016. I said, 2016. Sorry. Oh, yeah, sorry. I did a lot of drugs. No, I'm kidding. So I. This is fall of 2016. And I'm. I'm, like, going through it. I'm going to a bunch of different doctors. I'm trying to get high. And this time, I started finding ways to get drugs. And I ran out of all the options. But I went to multiple doctors, and I had a script of 90 perk 15s. And I was at CVS. And this. I'm living in Houston at the time. I'm at cvs. And maybe a week or two before, I had already had a script filled from another doctor. And so now I remember standing there looking at the pharmacist. Cause they were getting ready to give me the pills. They put it down on the counter, and they said, wait, wait, hold on. They checked their system, and it showed that filled another script from another pharmacy. And then I had this thought in my mind, there are the pills. I can snatch them and run. In that moment, I knew that I was an addict in that moment, because had I done that, I instantly would have went to jail for years. Like, that's. That's a felony. And I realized. And first thing I did, bro, is I called my doctor. I said, hey, I Need help. I'm struggling. I'm strung out. I don't know. I'm. I'm addicted to the medication. And what they did was they dropped me as a patient. Dang. They dropped me as a patient. And that broke me because I reached out for help for the first time. But when you understand that they had on record me doing drug tests, because I would have to do a drug test to get my medication, were multiple different narcotics in my. In my system, and they would still give me the script. And so now I'm, like, by myself. I'm isolated. But what I wanted to be more than anything, more than a football player, is I want to be a dad. I want to be a dad. And Chelsea gets pregnant.

Bryce Crawford (28:27)

And I said, well, I'll get married.

Marcus McFallen (28:28)

We get married. We're living in Houston. I'm struggling with drug addiction, and we're isolated. We don't have.

Bryce Crawford (28:33)

She know you're struggling with drug addiction at the time, or not really, or she.

Marcus McFallen (28:36)

She didn't know yet.

Bryce Crawford (28:37)

She thinks you're just taking the meds like normal.

Marcus McFallen (28:40)

She. Yeah, because she was a nurse, so she kind of understood, like. And I would be very transparent. I would be transparent enough with her, and I would tell her, like, hey, man, like, you know, I'm. I'm. I'm not getting the same effects. Like, I'm still in pain because there's a very real shoulder injury, but then there's a psychological injury, too. And so I'm feeding both with drug addiction, and I would feel high. I would feel good about myself. And when she got pregnant, man, I wanted to be a dad. I wanted to be a dad more than I wanted to be an NFL football player, but I didn't know how. And so I said, well, let's. Let's just get back to Ohio and get around all the Christians, but get around enough Christians, and something in my life would change. Well, I don't have team doctors in Ohio. I don't have people that would prescribe me medication as readily available as I had in Texas. And this time when we went to Ohio, everything implodes. Like, I. I went to 38 different doctors for 59 prescriptions in five months. That's how bad of an addict I was. And I was just in Ohio. I went to West Virginia, Pennsylvania. I was strung out, man. Bad. Like, strung out to the point where, you know, my first child is born, and people will send us gifts or they would send us gift cards. And my addiction was so bad, as I would take those gift cards or I would take the gifts that they would send us, and I would go back to wherever we bought them from, and I would take it to a coin kiosk to get money so that I can go and buy more drugs off the streets. I just didn't care. It wasn't, like my life's mission to be an addict. And I just remember just hurting, and I was hurting in silence, and I didn't think anyone would understand because I didn't want to be an addict. It wasn't my life's mission. And yet it was something that I continued to do because it was the only thing that made me feel good about myself was when I would take those pills. Dang.

Bryce Crawford (30:30)

And you even felt like. Like at this one point, you were let down by your dad, let down by the NFL, let down by your doctor when you cried out for help for sure. And now you're in this moment. What was the breaking point? Where did everything get lost?

Marcus McFallen (30:48)

The breaking point happened when. June 16, 2017. So I went to a bunch of different doctors in Ohio, and I got charged with three felonies, deception to obtain a dangerous drug. And the way that I got caught was I went to a hospital in one county, and then the next day, I went to another hospital in another county. I didn't realize that doctors can work in multiple hospitals across county lines. And my injury was so bad, I could just dislocate my shoulder on command. I could do it right now if you want.

Bryce Crawford (31:19)

No, Heck, you know, I don't want to see that.

Marcus McFallen (31:20)

It was just so bad. I could just pop it out. And then when I would go into the emergency room, I would talk about my story, and they would Google it. Now they're like, okay, this is, like, clearly he is who he says he is. And this doctor, I ended up seeing them one day, and then they were in the same. A different hospital in another county. And she said, I'll be right back. And then the next people that came in were the cops and said, hey, we just want you to know you have three warrants for your arrest. And I just remember it hit me. I'm like, oh, my gosh. They said, we don't feel like taking you up because it's cross county lines, but you have warrants for your arrest in Stark County. And I'm like, okay. Well, that's wild. I had no idea what to do. And the only thing I continued to do was try to get high. And the breaking point came when. June 16th. My wife was working as a nurse. I'm watching our seven month old little girl. And something was unusual about this day because Chelsea's never late from work. She was pretty. Like she headed down to a rhythm into a science. And she was late this day, like an hour late. And I'm like, man, this is, this is, this is unlike her. And at this point, I'm an unsafe person to be around. Nobody knows I'm gonna fly off the handles. I'm mixing pain medication with muscle relaxers. I'm trying to get the maximum effect. So I'm. I'm overdosing. Like, I'm literally would pass out behind the wheel sometimes, just crazy stuff. And my wife musters up the courage. It was one of the greatest, greatest shows of love that I've ever received from somebody. She called the police on me. I remember watching the cop cruisers come in front of the house and it was like out of a movie. And I'm there and I'm with my daughter and I'm like, what's happening? And they say, Mr. McFallin, you have to give us Avery, bro. They ripped my heart from me right on that, on that, on that porch. And they took me away to jail for the first time in my life. And after everything that had happened, I. I didn't know what to do. I'm like struggling because I popped 12 percocet before I went. I took 12 step. I'm gonna go to jail. I'm going to jail high. And so for the first, like five or six hours as I'm sitting inside of this holding cell, I'm high. I'm spawn, I'm having a good time. I'm like, you know what? Whatever. But then the drugs begin to wear off. And then this is the first time in three years that I wasn't high. All the depression, the anxiety, I was already like somewhat suicidal. Like, I had thought about that. I thought about taking my life, but I didn't think I would actually do it. But I found ways to do it in the most pain free way possible. I'm wrestling with all these thoughts, like, wait a minute. All of my bad decisions hit me like a ton of bricks. And then I got some choices to make. I get released on bond. I go home, everything's gone. He took everything. And in my mind I'm like, okay, well, there's nothing else to live for. The thing that I want the most is gone. My family's gone. Chelsea leaves me. Avery's gone. And so I would call Chelsea a hundred times a day. I'm trying to find her I'm looking for her and she's in hiding now because I'm unsafe. She doesn't. No one knows what I'm going to do. She's in hiding, hiding with some friends, and I'm looking for her. And I would call her and I would call her, and I would call her because I wanted to say goodbye to my daughter. So I knew what I was going to do on my first Father's Day. And I wanted to say goodbye to Avery. And she finally picks up for one 5 minute FaceTime phone call. And it was in this FaceTime phone call where everything changes. I remember looking at Avery through the phone and I felt like this love of a father to a child. And I realized I was becoming the dad that she didn't deserve. I was becoming everything that I had vowed not to be. But I remember looking at her and I said, avery, I'm going to do whatever I have to do to be in your life. And the next day, man, I saw a friend that had graduated from this program called Teen Challenge. I said, well, I'm just gonna check myself in and, and hope that, that things in my life could change, because if you want something you never had, you got to do something you've never done. So I checked myself into Teen Challenge, man, and, well, I tell you what it was. It was. It was life changing for me because in the program, for those that are unfamiliar with Teen Challenge, it was like basically Bible boot camp on steroids. Like, I thought Bible college was bad. We had to memorize almost 400 scriptures a month. What we had to do these things called contracts, where they would give you this massive contract where you had to go throughout the Bible and fill in the blanks. And then they would. You would have to sit there and there were these things called ELPs and they would literally quiz you. All right, all right, Marcus, what is James 1, 19, 20. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to become angry, for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Like, we would have to quote after every meal, before every meal, during, like, we would quote these scriptures first. Thessalonians 5, 18 and everything. Give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. I had all these, like, just. The word is just consuming. I'm just consuming the word. And it's, it's. It was transformational for me. And I. I realized the purpose of a greenhouse is it creates this atmosphere for growth. But even in the program, at first, bro, I tried to leave the program four days in Like Chelsea. So there's things they do these things called family days, where your family would come and they would be there and you get to visit on site for three hours. And I can only talk to her for 15 minutes a week. I get one 15 minute phone call. That's it. And I remember seeing Chelsea four days in. I'm like, oh, I'm healed, I'm delivered. I'm good. I tried to snatch the keys. I said, we're going home. And she looked at me, bro, and she said, you can go home, but you're not going home with me. Oh. In that moment, I knew that I'm going to be in this program for at least a year. Hit me like a ton of bricks. And I'm like, well, if I'm going to be here, I'm going to give all I left myself to this dang.

Bryce Crawford (37:07)

So encouraging Chelsea just being through the fire and through the fire, being in.

Marcus McFallen (37:11)

It, I mean, and being willing to do the hard thing because she didn't know if our marriage was going to be restored. She just knew that she had to do whatever. Yeah, she had to. For our daughter. And all throughout the program, I'm wrestling with God now. Yeah, I'm in the Word. I'm like, all right, well, I'm going to read it. And I would wake up an hour early. We had to get up at 6am every day like clockwork. Yeah. Feed had to be on the floor at 609. It was like the military mixed with, like Bible camp mixed with work. Yeah. Well, I mean, I've listened to thousands of hours of worship music, like, but I realized my brain was dirty and it needed some washing. Had to wash with the truth of the Word of God. And so I had this profound moment in rehab where I'm reading the Bible and I'm reading Ephesians chapter one. And I'm still kind of struggling because I always had that worker in me. Like, I thought that I could obtain something if I just did good enough. It's that same athlete mentality that a lot of us struggle with. And I thought that I had to earn or show God that I was good enough. And it says in Ephesians 1, verse 6, it says, to the praise of the glory of his grace, by which I've made you accepted in the beloved. For the first time in my life, 29 years old, I realized that I was loved and accepted by God. Game changer. I'm like, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. In John 3:16, it says, For God so loved the world that he gave his only son for me. Even though I made all these mistakes, he did that for me. Even though I messed up and I hurt all these people, he loves me. But my own dad didn't love me. How could God love me? And I realized the beauty of the gospel. And it, bro, it wrecked me. I'm like, oh my goodness. You mean to tell me all these years of learning about God, that there's actually power in the word of God? And I said, okay, I start. I under understood who Holy Spirit was. I read these scriptures because I didn't really read the Bible in Bible college. Like, I was just going through the motions to play football. And so I. I read these scriptures about the Holy Spirit being our teacher and our guide. And I said, all right, Holy Spirit, whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. That's a dangerous prayer to pray. I really felt in my heart that he wanted me to plead guilty to my felonies.

Bryce Crawford (39:22)

Dang. While you're in rehab.

Marcus McFallen (39:24)

While I'm in rehab.

Bryce Crawford (39:25)

How many months in rehab were you in when you felt like Holy Spirit was telling you to plead guilty?

Marcus McFallen (39:29)

This was October of 2017. So June, July, August, September, I'm four months in. Dang. Four months, bro.

Bryce Crawford (39:38)

That's crazy. Imagine you four months fully sold out for Jesus, and you hear the Lord.

Marcus McFallen (39:42)

Say, hey, please, guilty. And this is pre trial. Like, I don't even really know the extent of my charges. They just very beginning stages. So I've got three warrants.

Bryce Crawford (39:51)

I mean, they don't even let you talk in pre trial.

Marcus McFallen (39:53)

Really? Yeah, it's not a conversation. I thought I never been to court, something. You're just having a conversation. You're going back and forth with the judge, negotiating. And I realized that it's not like that. You stand there with your lawyer, your lawyer speaks on your behalf. But I'm in open court. And I'm like, man, God, I know I'm supposed to do this. I raised my hand. So everybody's there with their lawyers because it's not like. It's not like what you see on TVs. There's all these different people. It's a very chaotic environment. And I'm like, all right, hey, hey, let me, let me go ahead and ask the judge a question. My lawyer is looking at me freaking out, like, this is breaking protocol. What are you doing? And the judge permits me to speak. And the only thing I could blurt out is, I did it. I did it. I'm guilty. Everything they say on those papers, I did it. I lied to all the doctors. I just want you to know that I'm guilty. Then in that moment, the reality of the gospel hits me. The reality of the weight of my sin hits me. That all of us are guilty and we deserve something. But the beauty of the gospel is that God sent a perfect gift to stand in our place and take that sin on a cross. Take. And this judge looks at me with tears in her eyes. She says, I've never had someone be that honest in this court. Marcus, go back to Teen Challenge. And she completely drops all the charges. And I sit before you today without a record whatsoever.

Bryce Crawford (41:08)

Won't he do it?

Marcus McFallen (41:09)

Won't he do it, bro?

Bryce Crawford (41:09)

Won't he do it?

Marcus McFallen (41:10)

And I was already sold out for Jesus. I was, like, on fire. Because I read Ephesians 1:6. I realized I was accepted in the beloved. They used to call me the righteous police. I went back. I'm like, if God is for me, who can be against me? I'm like, the gospel, it's the truth. I'm like, I went berserk. I'm like, oh, my goodness. Like. And all I wanted to do was read the Bible. All I wanted to do was devour the word of God. All I wanted to do was read the Scriptures, because in them, I found so much life and so much joy and so much fulfillment. And God spoke to me in the lowest moment of my life. And he called me son.

Bryce Crawford (41:45)

Thing.

Marcus McFallen (41:46)

He didn't call me out of my name. He called me son. He called me beloved. He called me fearfully and wonderfully made. I'm like, man, God, I'm going to be all in. And. And the next profound encounter is all these things are happening. And I'm like, in Teen Challenge, I'm only talking to Chelsea for 15 minutes a week. I'm still kind of like, by the world standards, I'm still an addict. Yeah. And so I remember I'm reading Luke 15:1 day in class, and I'm just by myself, and I'm like, all right, God. Like, I'm just kind of digging through the Word. I'm talking Holy Spirit. People thought I was losing my mind, but I was just having a conversation with God. Like, I don't think we do that enough. We should just talk to him and listen to what he has to say. And I have this profound encounter, bro, where it's almost like everyone leaves the room, and it's just me and the Lord. And I'm reading the Word, and I hear Something speak to my heart. And he says, marcus, you were the lost sheep I left the 99 for. Don't you ever make ministry about numbers. Every single person has infinite value. He says, I've given you the ministry of reconciliation. Then I heard Reach1, which stands for reconciling every abandoned child home, bro. I had never preached before. I never spoke. I was a football player. Like, I didn't understand what that meant, but I just love people, and I. I did. People aren't an inconvenience.

Bryce Crawford (43:02)

Yeah, well, not even. That's not even putting you on blast.

Marcus McFallen (43:05)

But you didn't. You.

Bryce Crawford (43:06)

You didn't graduate high school.

Marcus McFallen (43:07)

Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (43:08)

You didn't graduate college.

Marcus McFallen (43:09)

Yep.

Bryce Crawford (43:10)

So you really didn't know how to speak, like, from, like, a literal, like, you know, knowledge standpoint, like, school level. You literally didn't know how to do it.

Marcus McFallen (43:20)

None of that. I'm just. I was just figuring it out with the Lord. I'm like, God, if. If you've called me to it, then you'll. You'll provide a way for me to do it. Like, it's on him. I put it back on him. Graduate the program. First thing I've ever graduated from in my life. Come on, come on, come on. I graduated.

Bryce Crawford (43:37)

Do you have that framed?

Marcus McFallen (43:38)

I do.

Bryce Crawford (43:39)

The certificate.

Marcus McFallen (43:41)

I remember before I graduated, I called my wife. I'm like, yo, chill. Like, can we like the little graduation part? Because I'd never had one.

Bryce Crawford (43:46)

Yeah.

Marcus McFallen (43:46)

And she's like, marcus, we. We don't celebrate graduating rehab. Okay? I'm like, you're right.

Bryce Crawford (43:51)

Yeah.

Marcus McFallen (43:52)

But I ended up coming home, man. Family was completely restored. Still married to the same beautiful woman.

Bryce Crawford (43:57)

Come on.

Marcus McFallen (43:58)

Got. Avery was there at my graduation. She was 18 months at the time. And it was literally the greatest day of my life because it was like graduating from jail. It felt like jail in a lot of ways. And I go back home and my spiritual father would come and visit me in Teen Challenge. And he says something so profound to me. He said, marcus, you go home and earn the right to be husband, father, and leader again. He said, don't you say a word. Just live this life. And I did that. I shut my mouth. I worked three jobs. I was a part time youth pastor. I worked for United Way. I was grinding. I just. Because in rehab, what they tell you is people, places and things. You go around different people go to different places and do different things. So I did that, and I had a healthy environment to come home to, and I was just grinding. And they say, if you quit your job within six months of graduating rehabilitation, either you are going to overlaps and die, or you're going to be back, you know, strung out. Wow. And I'm just kind of going, I'm. I'm figuring it out. But here's the reality is, like, I. I was not in recovery. I was recovered. I was redeemed. I was restored. People get mad at this, but the reality is this, like, I did not need 12 steps. I'm not knocking it for the people that it works for. But what I needed one step called surrender. And God completely, radically delivered me from addiction. But I didn't go to rehab to, to get off drugs. I went there to get a completely new life. And that's what happened. And so I'm home and I'm working at United Way, and I get a call from a principal, and he's like, hey, we heard about your story. We heard about you overcoming drug addiction. We think it would be valuable for you to inspire our students. What I couldn't believe. I'm like, you want me to. Want me to talk? You want to preach? So I bring it to my wife. I'm like, hey, babe. Like, I. Because the significance of that moment is if I said yes to that, United Way was going to fire me because they didn't want me to do it. Yeah. And so my. My wife is risk averse. She does not take risks. I'm more of like, hey, let's jump off the roof without a parachute and see what happens. But she looks at me, she says, marcus, now is time. Now's the time. And that was the birth of reach. 1. I spoke 2000 kids. My bro just got up for an hour and just screamed like, you matter. The gospel, like, Jesus can transform your life. I didn't know you couldn't preach the gospel in public schools. Like, nobody told me you couldn't do that. But a lot of kids got saved that day. That school has never invited me back, but we've been doing it ever since, man. And it's been cool to see how God can take a very weak yes. Because in rehab, it was a weak yes, but it was still a yes.

Bryce Crawford (46:32)

Dang.

Marcus McFallen (46:32)

And you can do special things with it. Dang.

Bryce Crawford (46:35)

My. I think the most encouraging part of your story is like that picture from the book of Micah when it talks about God dropping our sin in the sea of forgetfulness. And like, literally, you leaving the courtroom with legitimately no record. Like, if you look you up in the system, you don't have a record, though that is literally a physical Example of the gospel. It's the craziest thing ever. So encouraged by your story.

Marcus McFallen (47:02)

It's just wild, man. It's wild that Jesus, like, he looked down the quarter at the time and he saw that moment, and he knew that he was going to give me an opportunity. That's why I love free will. We can choose to do the right thing, even if it costs us everything, because that's what true integrity is, is doing the right thing when nobody's watching. And, like, my heart is to see a generational walk in that level of honesty and integrity, because God blesses it now. I was fully prepared, bro, to go to jail. I was fully prepared to preach the gospel in prison, if that's what it meant. But I knew that I never had to be alone another day in my life, that he was with me every step of the way. Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (47:39)

That's so powerful.

Marcus McFallen (47:40)

Before.

Bryce Crawford (47:41)

Before we close in prayer, I want you to share a story from rehab.

Marcus McFallen (47:48)

Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (47:49)

That I know you have. It might pertain with some pillows.

Marcus McFallen (47:53)

Oh, my gosh. I was like, where's he going? Yeah.

Bryce Crawford (47:59)

I want you to tell. I want you to tell you had an encounter with, like, the demonic.

Marcus McFallen (48:04)

Oh, bro. What?

Bryce Crawford (48:07)

What happened?

Marcus McFallen (48:07)

What? What?

Bryce Crawford (48:09)

Tell us that story that you had when you encountered demons in. In rehab.

Marcus McFallen (48:13)

For sure. Yeah. So Team Challenge is a super spiritually charged environment. You gotta think the. You got people that are strung out on harem for 20 years, 30 years, people that have, you know, dabbled in the occult, like, there. It's a crazy environment, and it is supercharged with supernatural activity.

Bryce Crawford (48:34)

Well, it's a Christian rehab. Right. But they have the highest success rate.

Marcus McFallen (48:38)

Yeah. If you graduate the program, the chances of you staying out are, like, five through the roof. It doesn't even compare to any other rehabs.

Bryce Crawford (48:44)

Okay. So that's why all these other people getting sent there. Just okay.

Marcus McFallen (48:47)

Oh, yeah. I mean, you got people there that they have four years over their head in prison. And it's a hard program, like this thing for a year straight. It's like being in the military. And so it's supercharged with all kinds of people. Like, I got so many stories. I would have roommates that were, you know, in the Aryan Brotherhood, like, wild stuff. I like crazy. And I'm one of three black people in the program, so I'm like, okay, this is crazy. But it's a supercharged environment. We have, like, former witches and war, like, crazy people that really were doing some demonic stuff. And so I'm like, one of the leaders in the program. And I was all about fasting and praying and seeking the face of Jesus. And so when a new guy would come in, he's fresh off the streets, which means he's fresh out of dealing with a lot of demonic stuff out on the streets. And so we would have these prayer gatherings, and I'm telling, like, physical demonic manifestations. Like, people's faces changing, like, growling, like, wild stuff. And so we had to learn how to what it meant to walk in authority. But one night after one of our prayer gatherings, I'm sleeping, and I'm gonna sound crazy to people, but I don't care. Like, I'm sleeping and something, like, wakes me up in the middle of the night, and I like, look. I look up, bro, and I literally see a floating pillow. I know it sounds. This pillow was legit floating. I'm like, what in the world is going on? And so, like, I started, like, trying to rebuke it. I don't really understand what I'm doing. I'm like, well, like, this is what the disciples. I rebuke you in the name of Jesus. Pillow falls down, everybody wakes up. I'm, like, running all up and down the hall screaming. Anybody was in the program with me, they remember this night. We would have some of the craziest encounters. Seeing orbs and, bro, wild stuff. For the sake of me not sounding absolutely nuts. Just know the demonic realm is more real than people realize. And, yeah, I've had some pretty wild encounters, bro.

Bryce Crawford (51:04)

No, I believe it. It's just so funny me, because, like, for a demonic manifestation to be a.

Marcus McFallen (51:09)

Floating pillow literally floating in the corner.

Bryce Crawford (51:12)

That is so funny. Oh, my gosh.

Marcus McFallen (51:14)

Yeah, man. Dang. Would you.

Bryce Crawford (51:16)

Would you mind praying us out to close?

Marcus McFallen (51:18)

Absolutely. For sure. Yeah. Father, I just. Thank you for now. Just moments like this, God. Moments where we can come together and we can boast about the good things that you have done. God, I thank you that you really say in your word you're a rewarder of those who diligently seek you. So, God, I pray for the person that listens to this. Would they understand that they've never made a mistake that has separated them from your love, that they can turn and surrender even now. So, God, I pray that for the generation that's been walking around with the orphan spirit, God, in the same way where you called and you told me to call my dad and forgive him, and you brought restoration back to our lives, God, I pray that you would do that for the young person that might be struggling today. God, I pray for full surrender. God, I pray that we wouldn't lean on our own understanding, but we would lean on the understanding of you and let this mind be in you that's also in Christ Jesus. So God, I pray that every person under the sound of my voice that listens to this would they realize the fact that there's still breath in their lungs means there's still so much purpose for their life. And God, I pray that they would keep going. In Jesus name, Amen.

Bryce Crawford (52:23)

Amen. Guys, thank you so much for watching and listening to this episode. If you guys like it, subscribe to us on YouTube, follow us on Spotify, Instagram, and Tick Tock. Bless you guys and see you guys next week for the next episode.

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