Ruth Jo Simons (3:01)

Hi. Hey.

Candace Cameron Bure (3:03)

How's today?

Ruth Jo Simons (3:04)

Well, it's, you know, the holiday and it's a little chaotic, but you know.

Candace Cameron Bure (3:08)

I know, I know. It's. I feel like My holidays have slowed down a bit over the years, I think, because my kids are getting older. I know I do Christmas movies every year, but even that seems a little less stressful because I shoot them actually in, like, January, February, March. So I'm. I'm actually ready for Christmas by the time it comes around again.

Ruth Jo Simons (3:32)

I wish I could say that, but. No, you're amazing. That's. I think it's because I'm in retail as well, so we run a. I mean, I run a retail company, so this is the time of year where it's a little nuts, you know, the holiday rush.

Candace Cameron Bure (3:45)

Do you. Is more family coming in for the holidays? Are all the boys going to be home?

Ruth Jo Simons (3:50)

Yeah, we're hoping that everyone will be together, so we're. We're planning on it. Good.

Candace Cameron Bure (3:57)

I don't. I don't know what we have in store this year with all of the kids. We are even. I don't know, we were even thinking of maybe. Maybe going away or taking a trip or going skiing or. I don't know. We might do something different this year, but we'll see.

Ruth Jo Simons (4:12)

There's this place called Telluride near where I live. I'm like, we could see each other over the holidays.

Candace Cameron Bure (4:17)

Is that where we should go?

Ruth Jo Simons (4:18)

I know. It's beautiful.

Candace Cameron Bure (4:19)

Would love that. Well, today we are talking about the way of resilience and that it is possible to become resilient even if you aren't yet. I want to know who is the most resilient one in your family.

Ruth Jo Simons (4:35)

My mind goes to Troy. Immediately I think of. And it's not even because he, you know, Judah with a back injury.

Candace Cameron Bure (4:41)

Troy is your husband?

Ruth Jo Simons (4:42)

Troy's my husband. Yes. I would, you know, some might say Judah because he survived a back injury and he got back out there. But I think of Troy because of the daily perseverance, his daily resilience. I think about how what his attitude is in every situation is like. It's kind of annoying. But his attitude literally is everything is an opportunity to grow. I mean, that's literally his attitude.

Candace Cameron Bure (5:07)

Best attitude you could have.

Ruth Jo Simons (5:08)

I mean, he genuinely. It's not even like he's. He's not annoyingly optimistic. He's just very like, okay, I messed up there. What an opportunity. I didn't get that right. What an opportunity. I'm wired so differently, Candace. I'm like, I failed. I give up. I'm not really great at that. Oh, my goodness. I better not try it again. Or I just have an attitude of, like, needing to kind of Nail it the first time. And Troy's resilience is this one of like, I'm a work in progress. And I think resilience is the, is the reminder that you kind of have to keep getting back up. You have to keep on fighting for it. And this idea of perseverance. We wouldn't even have to think about perseverance if it was simple just to coast our way through life. It's that you actually have to make a decision to get back up again and again and not, you know, wallow when things don't go well or when you make a mistake. And so, yeah, I think of him who's, who's the most resilient in your family.

Candace Cameron Bure (6:06)

I could easily say my husband as.

Ruth Jo Simons (6:09)

Well.

Candace Cameron Bure (6:11)

But not to be, not to sound self focused in this way, but I would like to think that I'm a quite a resilient person as well.

Ruth Jo Simons (6:20)

I think you are.

Candace Cameron Bure (6:21)

I, I had a friend tell me once, and not long ago, but he just was like, you've amazed me over the years. And he goes, I, I've seen all of the, the hits you've taken over the years, and somehow you're like the cat with nine lives, and you just keep getting back up and you keep going and you're still doing all the things that you want to do and you love and, and loving people. And I mean, they were such kind words and they were so affirmative in that way. But when I look back, I can, I can say, yeah, I, I am a resilient person. I've always felt like Mighty Mouse, you know, very little in size, but, but, but a warrior.

Ruth Jo Simons (7:01)

But I see in you that same trait of, like, you're always growing. You know, you have literally inspired me in my, you know, like, I started writing books, kind of had a very sedentary life. But I saw you inspire with, like, just start with this, you know, do a little challenge for yourself, do a little this and that. And I mean, I'm watching your stories and remembering like, okay, she's fighting for mobility, she's fighting for health, she's fighting for. And that's resilience, right? To say like, hey, this, My life might be busy, but I'm going to make some decisions to keep fighting the good fight, you know, and that's, that's really a resilient attitude. I love that.

Candace Cameron Bure (7:39)

Yeah.

Ruth Jo Simons (7:39)

So, yes, claim it, Claim it.

Candace Cameron Bure (7:41)

Well, where does resilience come from? And how do we build that muscle?

Ruth Jo Simons (7:46)

You know, I think biblically speaking, we read about how God provides everything we need for life and God lead us, that we ultimately need to turn to him for all, to. To supply us with every need. When we read in, I think it's Philippians, you know, that he who began a good work in us will complete it. Every time God gets the credit, he always gets the credit for our perseverance, for us enduring, for us having what we need to endure. I think a lot of times we might tend to think that resilience is something where you're granted something and then you're like, now I gotta muscle my way through to the end. But I think in Christ, what we read or what I see in my Bible is over and over again, it's that God desires for us to walk with him, that he is making us resilient day by day to pers. To bring us to the finish line, to help us persevere. So it's really not so much like, gosh, I'm going to be resilient because I'm. I'm just going to be. I'm going to tough it out. But that resilience and softness actually can go hand in hand where you say, okay, I surrender to the things that I can't control and. But I'm also going to step into bravely stand back up again, because I'm living for God. I love how you beautifully said it in a previous episode. I owe him my life, so I give him everything. So in some way, we even kind of think about resilience as Christ followers in a way where we say, this is not my own life. I don't get to just give up. I'm gonna be resilient because he gave me another day. If I woke up today with breath, it doesn't matter if the circumstances are what I want or not, because I trust my Creator, I'm going to live this day unto Him. And I think that's the way of resilience, right? To say, okay, the conditions might be harsh, you know, the. May not be favorable, but God's going to supply what I need to persevere another day, day by day.

Candace Cameron Bure (9:43)

What about something? When I think about resilience, I mean, I can think about really truly getting knocked down, and you take a hit, it's a blow, and you get back up and you keep walking faithfully like you just talked about. But sometimes there's things that we kind of just don't want to do, and yet we know we have to do them. And maybe that could be disciplining your children. Maybe it's reading the Bible every day like, there's a desire, you know, you have to.

Sponsor/Announcer (10:16)

You know, you should.

Candace Cameron Bure (10:17)

You want to do a good job, but you're just like, it's just so.

Ruth Jo Simons (10:22)

Helpful to hear you say that, Candace, because I think of you as, like, having this beautiful, daily, quiet time with the Lord. And I think I'm like, I have to fight for this so hard. I'm. I'm assuming you have to fight for it, too. I mean, I do.

Candace Cameron Bure (10:35)

Well, I will say it's easier now. I really crave my time with God. But I will say that probably for 20 years of my walk, I mean, I would say in the decade of my 40s, I fell in love with the Bible. But I've been a Christian since I was 12. I would say I was fully walking hand in hand with the Lord starting in my very early 20s. But from 20 to 40, I prayed every day, God, give me a desire to read your Word. Give me a desire to read your Word. And I didn't have one for 20 years, so it just felt like a struggle. I'm like, I don't really want to do this, but I know I need to, and I hope I learned something from it. But it just felt like a chore.

Ruth Jo Simons (11:19)

Yeah. And I think so many people relate. And I'll just confess, I actually wrote a chapter in this book, the Way of the Wildflower, about what to do when we don't want to read our Bibles. Because I just think it's important sometimes to just speak it, speak about it and just say, hey, it's not like. I think some people might imagine that as a Christian author or an artist, maybe I'm sitting there and the birds are chirping, and I'm opening my Bible and I'm like, understanding everything I read.

Candace Cameron Bure (11:46)

And it's. The perfect Instagram photo is beautiful.

Ruth Jo Simons (11:49)

My cappuccino is perfect. And somehow, like, I can apply everything to my life right this minute. And it wasn't until I, you know, kind of put words around it through my friend Jen Wilkin, who says, you know, it's not transactional. It's not like a debit machine where you're like, hey, I'm going to the Word, and I'm going to get some money out for my day. It's that you're putting a deposit in day by day, that change changed my viewpoint of like, oh, I'm not opening my Bible, going like this and going, I'm going to be resilient today because I read this verse. No, it said, I'm going to Be resilient. Because day by day I am working this muscle, this actual. I mean, you are, you are all about like exercising that muscle and training your body. And you're so strong. I mean, seriously, I'm always like, whoa, how many pushups did she just do? You know, but you are so strong. But that didn't happen overnight, right? You trained for that. And so I love that you said resilience is a muscle that, you know, how do you train for that? Because I think discipline, and that's not a bad word. You know, the daily disciplines, like disciplines of grace really are part of our resilience. Like God gave us the ability to have rhythms and make choices in our day to day. And so, I mean, since you brought it up, I'll just say, yeah, I've had spells in times where I just did not want to go to my Bible. I just didn't. And it wasn't like I was mad at God or I was walking away from my faith. I just was like, I am so distracted. I have so many other things that if I can't read it with a, with a really open mind, I don't want to read it today at all. And then that laziness turned into a week of laziness, turned into three months of, ooh, wait, now I'm operating on Instagram memes and reels. That's all I. You know what I mean? Like, you just get to like, little snippets of like, I think this word says, and you're not in the word. Yeah, well, I can tell you those were the seasons where my resiliency felt very like, I just, I wouldn't have called myself super resilient. Things would really, really turn me upside down. I felt like my fuse was really, really short. I couldn't see the, the big picture. Because if you're not in God's word, seeing the full picture that he's written, then you're going to focus on your own one little thing you don't like about your life or the one thing that you're just like, if I could just, yeah, you know, lose 20 pounds, my life will be perfect. Whatever it is that you fixate on and get anxious about or worried about or spin about, that one thing will kind of trip you up and cause you not want to get back up. If you feel like I can't move on until this thing is fixed. Well, reading your Bible actually helps you see God's total story in that, you know, and so for me, it really is. If I'm going to fight for resiliency. It's a fight for discipline. It's actually a fight to say, God's given me a mind and God's given me 24 hours in a day. I'm going to choose, hopefully get seven or eight hours of sleep, maybe if I'm lucky, but I'm going to use the other hours wisely so that I can stand back up day by day. What are some of the rhythms that you choose to be resilient?

Candace Cameron Bure (15:01)

Those are really good, good points that you made. Even within the Bible and with working out. They're very much two of the things that are most important to me in my day. And I think, just like working out as an example, you really have to put in a lot of work before you see the fruit, before you see the growth.

Ruth Jo Simons (15:19)

Say it again for those in the back, like, I mean, you have to.

Candace Cameron Bure (15:21)

Put in a lot of work before you see any of the growth. And so with my muscles, you're right, I couldn't, couldn't do a bunch of push ups and now they're fairly easy for me. I can, you know, and, and now as I'm even weight training and Val and I work out together and I love it, I'm lifting even heavier weights. I'm finally, after six months now seeing new muscles come in and I'm seeing the growth in those muscles and it's so exciting. And that is then the motivation where I go, oh, I want to get back to the gym. I don't want to miss this day. And I feel the same way about the Bible. So when I, when I really started reading and spending time with God and it became a desire of like, oh, I don't want to miss out on what God has to say to me today. I don't want to miss out on connection with him today. So, and I, and also I will very much say with humility, the fact that I do this podcast and I'm not a Bible teacher. Okay. I have you, I have you on. I have these wonderful guests where, you know, some of you have been to seminary, some of you have degrees and, and some of you don't, but you're well versed in the Bible. But I'm also like, I, I need to keep up and I need to know my Bible too. So when I'm talking to people, I'm not having imposter syndrome, you know, which I very much have, right?

Ruth Jo Simons (16:50)

We all the time. Because it always feels like I don't know enough.

Candace Cameron Bure (16:54)

I don't, you know, all those things. So in the same breath, I'm like, but I. I really do. To be my best. If I'm going to be talking about biblical things, I need to know my Bible. And it motivates me to keep learning and keep growing. And again, not to achieve perfection in it, not to become the most amazing scholar, but just to be the best that I can be in the Lord with the tools that God has given me and to reach my fullest potential. Because he gave us all talents.

Ruth Jo Simons (17:25)

Yes.

Candace Cameron Bure (17:26)

Sometimes we just need to exercise them or put in a little more effort to find where they are.

Ruth Jo Simons (17:32)

You know, I think about how in a previous episode, as you were just talking about, you know, seeking the Lord, your Bible reading came to mind and you were like, I was just reading about this king in the Old Testament. And. And I was like, wow, I don't remember that passage. Like, that's so amazing. I was like, wow, Candace. But I. That comes to your mind because you're. You're putting yourself before the Lord day by day. Whether that passage about Hezekiah was actually applied to your momentary situation or not. You were like, I am taking this in. I'm taking in how he interacted with God. And then it came to the surface when you were talking about, you know, seeking the Lord. And I was thinking about how in resilience, we're really. We wouldn't have to be resilient if the conditions weren't harsh.

Candace Cameron Bure (18:22)

Right?

Ruth Jo Simons (18:22)

I mean, because you don't really have to be resilient if everything is comfortable, cushy, and you're sitting on a beanbag. I mean, it's like if life is just like, if you're just coasting.

Candace Cameron Bure (18:30)

But don't we all want that? I certainly want it.

Ruth Jo Simons (18:33)

And our expectations are really funny. I'm like, sometimes I'm like, just hand me God's word, interpret it, help me totally apply it. Help me memorize everything so easily. And then if you could just give me the perfect conditions where I could live my best Christian life, that'd be great. But resilience, I mean, we've been talking about wildflowers in this. In this season, because they have just kind of illustrate a lot of things. Do you know that there are flowers that grow up specifically after a wildfire fire? After a fire, that the conditions of ash and burn actually is what will give them nutrients to grow up as flowers. Like, it's like their resilience is that they choose to say, hey, this. I mean, flowers aren't choosing. But I'm just saying with that metaphor in place. It's the conditions. The conditions are so harsh that you would think that nothing could grow up in them. But it's choosing to press on, choosing to take what is given in the difficult circumstance and be brave and be courageous and to step into it again. I think we can't really do that unless we not just feel, but actually are committed to doing that because the Lord's called us to. So, like, I'm not saying you can't be resilient if you're not walking with God. Obviously, there's every. There's lots of kinds of resilience, but I think the kind of resilience that helps us endure the hardest and the most painful things. Betrayals or sadness or grief or loss, disappointment. That kind of resilience doesn't happen just because you're putting on a brave face on the outside. That resilience comes from the inside out because you've trained for it.

Candace Cameron Bure (20:17)

Right?

Ruth Jo Simons (20:17)

And I think when I think about what we're given by the Lord to train would be access to his word, access to his presence, that we can walk right in and say, abba, Father, we're not enemies. We're not way back there going, can you take a call? We're saying, we're coming right in. Hey, it's your girl. Knock, knock. I need to talk to you. We have access. We can do that. Yeah. Another tool for resilience is that we get to put ourselves to bed. I love what Piper says. Sleep is a daily. Remember that God is God and I'm not. So some of us are trying to be resilient by being like, I'm gonna crank out some more, work till the middle. In the middle of the night. But that's not really resilience. That's actually weakening yourself, you know? So, like, we have these tools that God's given us to prayer. Prayer is a tool. Scripture reading is a tool. The discipline of resting. That's part of resilience. As somebody who works out, you have rest days, right? You can't recover. Your muscles won't recover if you push them to max. I know no vocabulary with muscle. But Troy's. Troy's been teaching me how to deadlift. I don't know if I've told you this. Oh, my goodness. I'm a good deadlifter. But anyway, like, you have to have a rest day. The muscles have to have a recovery. There's a reason why God said, hey, Sabbath thing is good. It's good. So I want to know is, has there been A season where it just kept. It just kept coming over and over. All the hits where you had to be resilient. Can you think of one?

Sponsor/Announcer (21:45)

Yes.

Candace Cameron Bure (21:46)

Pretty fresh in my mind. We talked about it last week or the week before, but. But in 2022 and 2023, it was a really hard year for me because of some things with work and moving networks and a lot of things bad things were said about me that just weren't true and headlines that were made up. And I felt like my character was just thrown in the gutter, you know, And I had felt like I've lived such a life of integrity and honesty, and so it really hurt. And it wasn't just about things that people were saying, but. But it resulted in contract losses and partnerships that dissolved and went away and friendships that. That just disappeared. And it just felt like it was never ending or it wasn't going to end. I felt like I was on a witness stand for a year and it felt awful. And yet that's when, you know, the James one comes to mind, and it's brothers and sisters. Consider it great joy when you face trials of various kinds because you know that the testing of your faith reduces endurance or perseverance, and let that perseverance have its full effect so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. And so even since then, for the last probably two and a half years, I have read that verse, I have chewed on that verse, I have clung to that verse over and over. It's kind of been my anthem or my flag pole to just plant my feet on. Consider it great joy when you face trials because it produces endurance, but it also, those trials produce the endurance of my character. They grow it just like I see.

Ruth Jo Simons (23:57)

It in you, because the reality is, like, you're resilient in that you're still here, you're still standing. You didn't give up, but you're resilient in that there's joy in your life, you know, and so when I think about you applying that, you have considered it joy, pure joy that you're going through these trials and stuff. And so I guess I was going to ask you. So can you think back to. In that period? You know, I'm kind of leaning in this question of, like, what kind of disciplines do I need so that I can come out of these unfavorable conditions on the other side with more resilience, with. With just the tools in place so that I don't give up quickly or easily?

Sponsor/Announcer (24:38)

Yeah.

Ruth Jo Simons (24:38)

Where there's some things I kind of.

Candace Cameron Bure (24:40)

Think about where is the parable. I think it's in one of the four gospels, but it's about that. Three different. Is it three people or four people got a coin, got coins, and it's the talents. And so some of them grew their talents, double some of them. One of them just made it a little bit, but one of them buried it. Completely buried it. And that was not a good choice. And they were like, well, you still got what you had, but God's like, I entrusted this to you, and you just went and buried it. You didn't grow it. You didn't even try. Like, it would have been better had you tried and lost it than just bury it away. And I think about that all the time. And especially during that season when I needed the perseverance and the resilience, I thought, well, what am I going to do? Am I going to cower? Am I getting that? Let all of these people or cancel culture just take me down? Am I going to let all of these words really hurt me so much that I will no longer be effective for the kingdom of God? That's exactly what the enemy wants. And so I thought, you're right. It's what the enemy wants, and I'm not giving it to him because I hate him. I hate the enemy. And so what is it, God? What can I.

Ruth Jo Simons (25:52)

What.

Candace Cameron Bure (25:52)

What am I gonna do? I'm gonna pick myself up and I'm gonna trust you, Lord, that you've got my back. And I'm gonna take one step at a time and have one conversation at a time, and I'm slowly gonna go back into this and however it looks, you know, and however long it takes. But I'm gonna keep walking with you hand in hand, God, because I don't want the enemy. The enemy's not gonna win, and he's not gonna win over my life. And I'm set in that. I know that, and I'm not gonna let him take me down. I trust God too much.

Ruth Jo Simons (26:21)

And God doesn't expect you to do that in your own strength. In fact, he wants you to be like, in the name of Jesus, God already has. He already has the victory in Christ. Satan can wage all sorts of mayhem on this earth, but God is still in control. What would you say to somebody who is like, yeah, I'm super disappointed. I'm super. Like, I feel misunderstood. How do you. How do you stand back up if you feel like I walk into a room and I feel like I don't know what everybody thinks about me, don't.

Candace Cameron Bure (26:56)

Get me wrong, because none of that, I know none of that is in my own strength and I certainly didn't do it alone. So having a trusted friend or partner, my husband was one of my biggest encouragers. My team around me, my partners in my business. And, and you need those people to speak those encouraging words to you, especially when you, you're feeling like you're in the pit. And so that is like my number one is if you have someone that you can trust to share those personal or intimate feelings, but also trust them enough to say, hey, come on. Yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna, we're gonna get up and get out of this and we're gonna take a step and can help walk you through it like that. You need that person. Okay, so I have been having a little glow moment lately. And if you have not tried the glow highlighter yet from Adele Natural Cosmetics, oh my goodness. It gives your skin the prettiest natural sheen. I press a little bit on the tops of my cheekbones and then I blend it in with my finger. I dab a little right above the brow and on the inner corners of my eyes. It's really good for tired mornings. And here's a trick I love. I tap just a little bit at.

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Candace Cameron Bure (29:51)

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Ruth Jo Simons (31:01)

Don't you think so often it's like you have to walk in obedience before you even feel the. You don't feel like you're resilient. You weren't like going, I'm such a resilient person.

Candace Cameron Bure (31:12)

Not at all.

Ruth Jo Simons (31:13)

You're like, am I gonna make it? And then you take the next step. And you take the next step. You know, it makes me think of, I don't know why this just came to mind, but you know, we all love Jeremiah 29:11. You know, the plans for you, you know, to prosper and all the good stuff. But just before that, like God's people are being given this like picture of you're not coming out of exile, exile anytime soon. You're going to have to, you're going to be in this really unfavorable situation for a while. Like, this is not the best that you're in Babylon. This is not a good situation. And the instructions to them were to grow a garden, build houses, seek the welfare of the city that they're in. Do you remember that passage? I mean, I'm not quoting it well, but it was such an eye opening thing for me to realize that this idea of prospering and flourishing in harsh conditions actually starts with doing obedient things and stewarding what you already have. So if it's like, what I have is I can invest in my family, I can build, build and grow things and serve those around me. And then, you know, it's like through the prophet, he actually says, God says, seek the welfare of the city you're in because its welfare will be your welfare. And I, I just stop and go, okay. In the harshest, most unfavorable conditions, God's people were instructed to be busy about doing good right where they are not trying to get out of the circumstance. And I actually feel like that's exactly your testimony of that season. I didn't get to live in your community. I wasn't hanging out and talking to you every day. But I saw you basically say, okay, I may not have this and I may not get to, you know, orchestrate everything the way I want, but I am taking what I do have and what God's entrusted me with, and I'm going to take that and I'm going to do good with it. I'm going to do the most I can with what I already have. And I think that's seen biblically over and over again.

Candace Cameron Bure (33:11)

I also think the way I look at it, and this is kind of that half glass full or half glass empty. And I always like to have look at the half glass, the glass half full. And so when God does take things from your life or he strips it down, it's a place of. I immediately say, okay, God, this is what you just said, what Troy says. I immediately am like, cool. So something wasn't serving. Something wasn't serving me in what you have for me, God, and what, or what I'm supposed to do with you or for, you know, all of that, it wasn't serving me. So even though I'm disappointed that here I thought I was building something great and now it's being torn down, it really just means that there's something else that you're going to have me do or a different way you're going to have me go. And, and it doesn't have to be bigger or greater. God doesn't always promise that it's bigger or greater. It's just different. It's just a different path. And that's why I'm like, I don't wanna be on the path that God doesn't want me on. So I can. Even though I could be very disappointed and really bummed out about certain things, when I get a little bit of clarity on it, I'm like, oh, I wanna be in your will. I want you right where you have me. So if that wasn't serving you, you know, or serving me, then, then good, let take me where you want me to go.

Ruth Jo Simons (34:43)

Okay, that all that was for me. You're making me tear up now because I. I have been walking through. I don't think I've gotten even to tell you a lot about it, but it's not ugly and it's not messy. But somebody I love very much, who's been a ministry partner for me in the last almost decade of life. Thank you. Has stepped down and is not in the capacity that we have planned to work together in forever. The words that you said, I thought we were building something. I thought it was gonna look like this. And it's not just about her. It's about my overall work. It's the thought that. Lord, I thought this is where I was going, and I thought this is what you had planned for me. And it's supposed to feel like this. And I like to not take two steps back here. Like, this feels really hard to work this hard for so long, and then to be like, oh, I feel a little alone in this now, and I just heard you say all that. And I know it was for our listeners, but I think it's really for me. Because if that's like, God is not wasting anything, and if it's not for me, then I could work really hard to keep things exactly the way they were, and I could say, no, no, no, let me fix it all and make it so that I. I get it the way I want it. And, you know, I'm not trying to be vague, but I'm just saying I'm in. I'm. I'm doing a work that I thought I was building to be in this situation. And now I'm like, oh, that's not for me to have. And now I'm like, where do I go and how do I do this? And. And I just. So, first of all, thanks for. For speaking into my life that way. But I just think disappointment sometimes is so. It's. It's so revealing because it tells you and it shows you what maybe you were putting your expectations in that really were a substitute for trusting God. It's that you could have expectations in a person. It could be even a good person. You can. I have great expectations around this ministry partner that I love so much. And I thought she and I would work together in the same way for the rest of our lives. And that parting, thank goodness, wasn't ugly and isn't. Isn't personal and isn't bad. It's just life. It's life circumstances. It's life direction in what to spend time on. And I think it was helpful for me After I. Can I be honest and tell you I had a meltdown I did not deal with? And I don't know.

Candace Cameron Bure (37:21)

We all have meltdowns.

Ruth Jo Simons (37:22)

I'm, like, trying to picture whether you would have had a meltdown. Like, I'm like, okay, I had the worst meltdown. And I was like, wow, after that meltdown, I kind of stopped and was like, lord, help me remember that it's by you, for you, and to you. Like, this is not about, hey, I can run hard because I have this person. The person is not. Like, I can't put my hope in a person. I can't put my hope in a circumstance. If your business changes, you just said to me, hey, if that's not what God had for me, he has something better. And I'm still working that out. I'm not there yet, but maybe next year when we talk about this, I'm gonna be able to say, I see how the Lord will.

Candace Cameron Bure (38:09)

And you will. It's not if you will.

Ruth Jo Simons (38:12)

It. It.

Candace Cameron Bure (38:12)

It took time. It took over a whole year for me to get there. And. And now I can confidently say, yeah, I'm just. God just had a different route for me, a different path. And so we're gonna. We're gonna just reroute and we're gonna build from here.

Ruth Jo Simons (38:30)

And I think it's us just even verbally assessing the fact that resilience doesn't just come by default. You have to actually fight for it and say, like, I know o. Even just the voc. I mean, I want everybody listening to borrow the sentence that you just said, you know, like, almost, like, I'd encourage you. If you're listening, just jot down what Candace just said. You know, God, if this is not what you have for me, you're gonna reroute me and your way is better. Like, it's still gonna be better. And sometimes we don't feel it. And I. I think we're here where you're, like, on the other side, where you're like, I see how God had a better plan. And I'm like, I see how I'm not dying yet, but maybe. Maybe I'll still be okay. And so the. When you're still in the middle of a chaos, you might be like, lord, take me out of the eye of the storm. You know? But resilience is saying, okay, I'm not the one who's got to fix everything. I'm going to put into place how I can steward what you have given me. This is me putting into practice my own Words like, okay, what do I. What do I actually have? I have another day to step into the calling you give me with the people that you've given me, with the resources that I have. Don't focus on what I don't have. Focus on what I do have and I'll report back in a few months.

Candace Cameron Bure (39:46)

Report back. And I always think about Ecclesiastes 3. It says there is an occasion or there is a time for everything.

Ruth Jo Simons (39:55)

Yeah.

Candace Cameron Bure (39:55)

A time for every activity under heaven. It goes on to say, and you know, it's like a time to kill, a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build. And I think that is a Mamas and Papas song. Or they took some of those verses and people just think they're lyrics. But no, it's the Bible. And I'm not saying that every disappointment is a whole season, but even your business and the way you are building it, there is a time for everything. And there was a time for it to be built that way, and now there's a time for a new way.

Ruth Jo Simons (40:32)

So do you think maybe. I don't know. I hadn't thought about this before this moment, but is part of resilience even having the imagination that God is more creative than us? Right. I mean, having imagination because if I can't imagine it, I'm like, it doesn't exist. But really everything happened without me. So like God has.

Candace Cameron Bure (40:55)

Yeah. For me it's really a. Resilience is a place of total surrender.

Ruth Jo Simons (40:58)

Yeah. Yeah. Really is.

Candace Cameron Bure (41:01)

Yeah.

Ruth Jo Simons (41:02)

Because you think resilience is being strong, but resilience is actually surrender. It's being soft to the will of God.

Candace Cameron Bure (41:08)

Yeah, exactly. Okay, let's take a listener question.

Ruth Jo Simons (41:12)

Okay.

Candace Cameron Bure (41:13)

This is from Inga. She asks how many. Do you have any tips on how to have time with God to read your Bible in the morning if you have to wake up very early? I'm a 17 year old girl.

Ruth Jo Simons (41:26)

I love that.

Candace Cameron Bure (41:27)

I love when you. When the young people are listening and.

Ruth Jo Simons (41:29)

Watching the podcast this.

Candace Cameron Bure (41:31)

I'm a 17 year old girl. Oh, and I'm loving and enjoying the season you had with Ally and Natasha. Oh, thanks, Inga. I'm so glad that you have loved it. So I bet you're probably in school, you have to wake up very early. So you're wondering how you have that Bible time in the morning. You know, curious to hear your answer. But I, I have a go. A go and flow type of mentality when it comes to my Bible time. I love if I can have it in the morning. But it is not my end all. And I'll be quite honest that it's actually not my go to time because I am still processing, my brain is still waking up. So to wake up and go right into the Bible doesn't actually serve me well. I'd rather go have a workout and get everything moving and then have my time. So I know it's different if you're probably in school and I would just say make, make time to have it. But if it's important for you to have it in the morning, maybe you, you have it early on Saturday and Sunday when you have a little more time to sleep in and you do two days a week in the morning, but you find that time within the afternoon. Or maybe you have a class where you don't have a period and you can use that time at 9am to do 20 minutes of Bible time. There's, there is no set way that you have to do time with God.

Ruth Jo Simons (43:01)

And I think seasons change, right? Like when I, when my, when I was getting up every three hours to nurse a baby. That's a different season than the season I'm in now. But I think I would also say to Inga that there are different ways to engage with God's word. And so if you're waking up in the morning and you're running out the door and you're making your smoothie and you're trying to get to class on time, that might be a good time to do audio Bible. I love to play it and there's different apps and different services. I listen to the ESV Bible app, but you can also do the Dwell app and there's music and voices and you version like you version. There's a lot of versions of how you can do this, but that's a great way to be like I'm going to play God's word, like the soundtrack of my day and to engage. But I'm not sitting down journaling. I'm not doing word searches. I'm not, I'm not doing word studies based on, you know, God's word right now. And that might take another time. That might be your Saturday morning where you say, I'll go to the coffee shop on Saturday morning and study and do my Bible study. But maybe every morning when you're getting ready and doing your makeup for the day, that's the time to, and I do that often where I just go before I get a whole lot of other, you know, influx of information. I'm going to let God's Word be the soundtrack of my morning and just play God's word.

Candace Cameron Bure (44:14)

That's great.

Ruth Jo Simons (44:15)

Okay, well, our second listener question is an anonymous one. How do I make myself be still and listen for God to speak to me? I get so distracted and have a hard time sitting still, so I feel as though I am missing out. Well, I love that you're even asking this question, because I think this is a generation. This is a time where people cannot even slow down. And that's why we can scroll forever and find ourselves on weird cat videos and don't know how we even got there.

Candace Cameron Bure (44:47)

I mean, I love cat and dog videos.

Ruth Jo Simons (44:49)

Right? But seriously, I'm like, what did I hit and how did I get there? Because we're so distracted and like, something like reels never ends. It just keeps going on Instagram. And you could just be distracted forever. So a couple things, I think. One, you know, stillness is actually a spiritual discipline. You know, silence and solitude. That stillness, that being quiet enough where you're turning off inputs, where you're not, like, constantly, like, stimulating your brain with more input, that's actually a discipline. So I do think you have to, like, fight for that, schedule it, choose to go and, like, actually sit quietly for a time.

Candace Cameron Bure (45:23)

You know, I would also add, you talked about this our very first week, but when you walk, when you walk in nature.

Ruth Jo Simons (45:33)

Yeah.

Candace Cameron Bure (45:34)

That is a quiet time for me in God. So I relate to this. I have a much harder time to sit and be still or be on my knees or a posture of prayer, and I'm just listening. It's harder. You know, you start going through the laundry list of things that you have to do instead of actually listening for God. That's harder for me, but I do it. I do practice it. However, I love having quiet time with God on a walk. So that is a time I can listen, but there's still movement. And that actually helps. It just. It helps me have. Even though it's not still, there is a stillness in my mind. And I feel like I can have. I can hear God better on a walk than just trying to sit in a room by myself.

Ruth Jo Simons (46:19)

Yeah.

Candace Cameron Bure (46:20)

And close my eyes.

Ruth Jo Simons (46:22)

Yeah. You know, and just for anyone who's listening and maybe this concept of being still and hearing from God is new. I just want to say I personally have not heard the audible voice of God in my life.

Candace Cameron Bure (46:34)

Me either.

Ruth Jo Simons (46:34)

And so for me, when I'm talking about how God speaks to me, I do believe he speaks to me. He speaks to me through His Word. I am coming to it. Not with an agenda to have to do something. I have to be still enough to say God's word is speaking to me. But also I find that if I pray specifically, if I pray intentionally and don't say, you know, like, give me a sign the next thing, Lord, but rather I'm praying about something that's weighing on my heart, then I'm attuned to listening better because I've been praying about it. So if, let's say I'm praying about seeing God's answer about, you know, what, what I should do next about a certain situation, if I'm faithful to keep praying about it, then I find that I'm actually wired to pay attention to how he might speak to me. So a conversation with a godly sister in Christ might turn out to be a way of me going, I think the Lord was really speaking to me there. Maybe it wasn't audible. It wasn't the Lord saying, ruth, Ruth, you know, but it's. It's that he's really meeting my needs and in my heart and his word and his voice won't contradict each other. So as we pray about those things, be on the lookout for how he answers through other people in your life, how he answers through you. Looking up at the sky and noticing something grand and beautiful that soothes your soul and reminds you of who he is, how he answers through the word. So hearing I'm just reading the question and thinking, you know, how, how to listen for God to speak to you. That can come in several forms, but make sure you're going to the word and letting him speak to you primarily through his word.

Candace Cameron Bure (48:13)

Yeah, that was awesome. And this is the end of another week. It goes by so fast. Oh, it's so great. Well, thank you. Come back next week for sure. We're going to keep this conversation going. And remember, we have a free advent guide for you this season. It's available@candice.com you can also ask lots of questions there for future episodes. And if you want to talk about what we shared on the show today, today you can get on my app and join the together community. Go to Candice.com together for details about how to become a monthly member. Until next time, be grateful all day, every day.

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Ruth Jo Simons (49:36)

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Candace Cameron Bure (49:52)

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