The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - Episode: The Supermarlet of Sin

Release Date: February 11, 2025
Host: Joey "Coco" Diaz & Lee Syatt
Guest: Nick Askalise

1. Joey Diaz’s Hilarious Hospital Misadventures (02:34 – 19:32)

In this segment, Joey Diaz shares a series of uproarious and candid stories about his recent hospital stay due to diverticulitis. From accidentally losing a lens in his sunglasses while driving at high speed to enduring chaotic hospital conditions, Joey’s tales are both funny and relatable.

Notable Quotes:

• "I’m doing 80 on Route 3 with a missing fucking lens." (02:34)
• "Listen, last week they put on an Unmasked episode. I love when they do this because only white people fall for this, okay?" (09:12)
• "Every week was. I came last Wednesday." (04:55)
• "I’re in there giving blood and there are other motherfuckers coming in trying to give you like another needle, a back rub." (34:47)

Joey humorously describes the challenges of being in the hospital while under the influence, dealing with incessant questions from medical staff, and encounters with fellow patients. His vivid storytelling paints a chaotic yet comedic picture of hospital life, highlighting his ability to find humor in any situation.

2. Super Bowl Banter and Sports Insights (05:44 – 08:24)

Transitioning to sports, Joey and Lee discuss the recent Super Bowl, focusing on Joey’s successful bets and his strong opinions on NFC East teams.

Notable Quotes:

• "I thought Philly was going to get in their ass like that, you know, I didn’t like that." (07:43)
• "I knew it. I knew that for them to win, it had to be NFC east football." (06:49)
• "I make more money than you do. The whole fucking deal, you know, it’s all the fake hugs and shit." (07:22)

Joey praises Lee for his luck with Super Bowl bets, expressing satisfaction over Philadelphia’s performance while critiquing the traditional toughness of NFC East football. Their banter underscores Joey’s passionate and sometimes blunt take on sports, adding a layer of humor and camaraderie to the discussion.

3. Wild Tales from North Bergen and Childhood Memories (19:22 – 73:41)

Joey reminisces about his youth in North Bergen, sharing colorful stories of his early days, interactions with friends and family, and youthful antics. From mischievous escapades robbing stores to navigating the rough neighborhoods, Joey’s anecdotes provide a window into his formative years.

Notable Quotes:

• "We used to destroy all these fucking restaurants. Like, we went to Piccolissimo. You know, I still talk about that shit." (49:50)
• "We were spics. And I was the only Spanish guy there." (82:07)
• "That hotel has been there since we used to go there to get potato chips." (70:13)
• "And that was how I met your family, because it was Democos against somebody else." (75:35)

Joey recounts his involvement in petty crimes during his teenage years, including a memorable jewelry store robbery and various run-ins with the law. His storytelling is raw and unfiltered, blending humor with reflections on how these experiences shaped him. The conversation delves into the evolution of North Bergen, highlighting both its enduring charm and persistent issues.

4. Special Guest: Nick Askalise’s Journey and Political Aspirations (43:15 – 109:57)

Nick Askalise, Joey’s nephew, joins the conversation to discuss his own life, education, and ambitions. Nick shares his experiences growing up with Joey, his studies in criminal justice, and his aspirations to enter politics.

Notable Quotes:

• "By the time I’m 35, I want to be a mayor somewhere in the county." (108:46)
• "I'm entering the world of politics. So we'll see where it goes from here." (68:18)
• "I’m honored to be here. Because when I was younger, I used to watch you guys’ podcasts." (52:15)
• "They’re looking to get tortured." (27:07)

Nick provides insight into his educational background at John Jay College of Criminal Justice and his work experience. He expresses a deep respect for Joey’s legacy and shares his plans to support local politics, aiming to make a positive impact in Hudson County. The dynamic between Joey and Nick showcases a blend of mentorship, familial bond, and mutual aspirations.

5. Reflections on Fame and Influence (85:41 – 107:14)

Joey and Nick discuss the impact of Joey’s podcasting on listeners, particularly the younger generation. They touch upon how true stories and authentic conversations resonate with the audience, fostering connections and providing relatable content.

Notable Quotes:

• "Tell me about when you failed and how you fucking overcame that. That's what we want to hear." (61:25)
• "Our connection was that we weren't perfectly. You and I were far from perfect." (62:15)
• "I'm just telling you what I hear. So that's the connection." (62:15)

Joey emphasizes the importance of honesty and vulnerability in storytelling, arguing that sharing genuine failures and struggles creates a stronger bond with listeners. This segment underscores the podcast’s mission to blend humor with heartfelt narratives, making it a trusted space for followers.

6. Closing Thoughts and Upcoming Plans (109:57 – End)

As the episode wraps up, Joey, Lee, and Nick share their plans for upcoming shows and events. They discuss the potential impact of political involvement and the importance of community support.

Notable Quotes:

• "We're gonna keep it going as much as we can. Because it was about at the end, the Achilles legacy. He had a great, he was a great coach." (106:46)
• "We're going to win this election in June. That's all I have to say about that." (108:52)
• "We got my fucking special guest tonight. He's the guy here cracking up in the back all the time." (42:08)

The hosts express excitement about future endeavors, highlighting their commitment to maintaining the podcast’s engaging and authentic atmosphere. Nick’s ambition to become a mayor signifies a new chapter, blending personal growth with public service aspirations.

Conclusion:
The Supermarlet of Sin episode masterfully intertwines Joey Diaz’s humorous yet poignant anecdotes with meaningful discussions on personal growth, community, and influence. Featuring heartfelt exchanges with his nephew Nick Askalise, Joey reinforces the podcast’s dedication to authentic storytelling and genuine connections. Whether recounting wild hospital tales or reflecting on childhood in North Bergen, the hosts deliver an engaging narrative that resonates with both long-time listeners and newcomers alike.