The Karol Markowicz Show: Faith, Family & Education in a Digital Age | Bethany Mandel & John Ashbrook

Summary

The Karol Markowicz Show: "Faith, Family & Education in a Digital Age"

Guests: Bethany Mandel & John Ashbrook
Host: Carol Markowitz
Date: January 28, 2026
Podcast: The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show (iHeartPodcasts)

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Overview

This episode of The Karol Markowicz Show (a featured segment on The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show) focuses on crucial issues at the intersection of faith, family, and education in today’s digital world. The show is divided into two major segments:

1. A listener advice segment with Bethany Mandel, co-author of Stolen Youth and host of "The Mom Wars" podcast, discussing a listener's family and education dilemma.
2. An in-depth interview with John Ashbrook, co-host of the Ruthless Podcast, exploring his journey through politics and media, the importance of humor in conservative media, and the meaning of family and parenting today.

Throughout, the conversation is warm, authentic, and often humorous, offering a blend of practical advice and cultural insight.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Listener Advice: Navigating Changes in Family & Faith

(Bethany Mandel joins to answer a listener question)

• The Listener's Dilemma:
  • A committed Christian couple made life decisions around church and homeschooling. The husband now wants to stop attending church regularly and prefers their children to attend the Christian school he attended instead of homeschooling. The listener feels unsettled by these changes and seeks advice.
  • [03:27–04:55]

Bethany Mandel’s Response

• On Changing Plans and Flexibility in Marriage:
  • Bethany notes that it's a good sign the husband wants Christian schooling for the kids, not public school, and that changes of opinion as parents are normal:

    “His reasoning is not bad… We went into, you know, being parents, not knowing what we wanted to do, and we changed. And Seth, my husband, changed also. I think that you need that flexibility… If he had said, I want to send the kids public, I think that’s where I would say, stand up and fight.”
    [05:05–05:51]

  • Practical advice: Agree to try the Christian school, but reassess after kindergarten—especially if finances are tight:

    “Let’s just see how kindergarten goes. And kindergarten was 2019 to 2020 … I think I would say to the husband, okay, but let’s reevaluate at the end of kindergarten. Unless there’s a money concern, which there just might be.”
    [06:16–06:34]

  • On financial stress and private education:

    “If tuition is too much of a stretch, then that’s where you kind of stand up and say no.”
    [07:58–08:20]

Carol Markowitz’s Reflections

• Watching for Deeper Issues, But Accepting Change:
  • Jokes about suspecting everyone is “on drugs”—a nod to her Brooklyn upbringing—but acknowledges sometimes people’s priorities simply shift.
  • Encourages monitoring the husband’s demeanor for any real issue but accepts that “plans change”:

    “My husband and I got together with the plan that we would live in New York forever. And if one of us didn’t want to do that, that would be crazy. … Here we are four years into our Florida life and obviously things changed.”
    [09:25–09:52]

  • Advocates flexibility, watching for any true issues, and being open to mid-course corrections in family plans.

Notable Moments

• Bethany’s Practical Humor:

  “I would have told him to get a job at a law firm because we can’t afford it. And that’s it. … I wasn’t willing to have fewer [children] for the sake of paying for private school, so.”
  [07:42–07:58]

• On using school requirements as leverage:

  "Attending church is a requisite of sending our kids to this school. Sorry, it’s out of my hands."
  [08:21–08:39]

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2. Interview: John Ashbrook on Community, Podcasting, and Family

(Deep-dive conversation covering John’s background, the Ruthless Podcast’s style, and personal reflections on family)

Roots and Identity

• Cincinnati Roots:
  • Discusses the unique pride and communal culture of Cincinnati natives:

    “A lot of other people from Ohio don’t always consider Cincinnati as part of Ohio. They always say it’s like a nation state.”
    [15:26–15:45]

Career Journey

• From Political Operative to Podcaster:
  • Originally started in politics (driver for a Congressman, then press secretary) and always loved conservative talk radio:

    “I used to listen from Bill Bennett in the morning … to Laura Ingram … Rush Limbaugh … Sean Hannity … and then Mark Levin.”
    [17:51–19:19]

  • Ruthless Podcast began as a COVID-era Zoom happy hour with friends, drinking bourbon and betting on horses; it went public in October 2020.
  • On transitioning from political staffer to (somewhat) public figure:

    “You go back there as somebody who's doing podcasting, and people are like, oh, no, I listen to the podcast. … It is different than political communications, where usually you’re trying to sort of downplay the controversy. But on the show, you always love the controversy.”
    [20:15–21:07]

Humor as a Political Force

• On Lightness and Wit in Conservative Media:
  • John credits Rush Limbaugh for blending humor and information—now often rare in conservative commentary:

    “There’s so much content out there, particularly on the right … where everybody wants to read you the Federalist papers. … That’s not how Rush was … a guy who is absolutely at the top of his game in broadcasting, changing media … a lot of that had to do with his humor and not taking things too seriously.”
    [21:44–23:03]

Family & Parenting

• Most Proud Of:

  • “100% my children. I've got three daughters, and I love these girls more than life itself.”
    [25:59–26:21]
  • Shares heartwarming and humorous stories about each daughter—one a talented singer, another with Down Syndrome who “brings so much humor,” and the youngest an enthusiastic athlete.

• The Meaning of Parenthood:

  • “Parenting is the greatest thing that could ever happen to a person … there is nothing better in life than kids.”
    [27:20–27:42]
  • Talks about the cultural trends depicting parenting as joyless, and expresses the desire to counteract that perception:

    "There's been a collapse in the idea that young men should have kids ... talking about how amazing parenting is ... goes a long way to changing that conversation.”
    [27:42–28:08]

  • On exhaustion:

    “It is exhausting. But the exhaustion is worth it.”
    [29:28–29:34]

Advice for Life in the Digital Age

• John Ashbrook's Best Life Tip:

  “You’ve got to unplug and you’ve got to just take some time. You got to put your iPhone down. You got to put Twitter down. … and just live life with those who are around you … It is so gratifying to spend time with people in real life and not on… your phone… it always energizes you in a way that you’d never expect.”
  [35:45–36:40]

Five-Year Predictions (with Characteristic Humor)

• Struggles to make firm predictions, but hopes for:
  • The Cincinnati Bengals making another Super Bowl
  • The Cincinnati Reds in the World Series
  • The Republican Party regaining national strength
    [34:17–35:16]

Notable Quotes

• “What people hear on our show is exactly what we’re doing when the cameras are off. … If I say something dumb, everybody laughs at me. … The audience really likes that. … It adds a layer of authenticity that you don't always get with the legacy media.”
  [23:20–24:26]
• “It’s a lot of fun watching them [his daughters] experience life … Parenting is the greatest thing that could ever happen.”
  [27:20–27:42]

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Important Timestamps

• Advice Segment w/ Bethany Mandel: 02:28–10:34
• Listener’s Question Read: 03:27
• Bethany’s Perspective on Marriage & Schooling: 05:05
• Carol’s Thoughts on Changing Life Plans: 09:25
• Interview with John Ashbrook: starts 14:36
• On Cincinnati Pride: 15:26–16:23
• Path to Ruthless Podcast & Radio: 17:51–21:07
• Importance of Humor in Media: 21:44–23:03
• Parental Pride & Parenting Wisdom: 25:59–27:42
• On Modern Parenting Narratives & Young Men: 27:42–28:08
• Unplugging from Digital Life: 35:45–36:40

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Memorable Moments

• Bethany Mandel’s advice to handle school choices practically: “Let’s just try kindergarten and see how it goes.” [06:16]
• John Ashbrook’s warmth describing his family: “My oldest daughter … when she sings, it brings tears to your eyes.” [26:21]
• The closing life tip: “Touching grass and living your life in real life.” – Carol Markowitz, to which John enthusiastically agrees. [36:40–36:44]

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Summary

This episode stands out for its honest, relatable conversation about how faith, family, and education plans evolve—sometimes unexpectedly. Both Bethany Mandel and John Ashbrook stress the value of flexibility, humor, authentic relationships, and real-life presence in an age of digital distraction and shifting cultural narratives about parenting. The light tone, sprinkled with laughter and real-life stories, makes for an insightful and engaging discussion valuable for any listener navigating similar issues.

Transcript

[Carol Markowitz]

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[John Ashbrook]

In April and now I have customers out the door.

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[Bethany Mandel]

Hi.

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She started putting a portion of her.

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Business is booming. That's why I'm working on a Saturday.

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[Carol Markowitz]

Hi and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz show on iheartradio. Kicking it off today with one of these advice segments that you all seem to to enjoy so much. And if you've got questions, write [e-mail] and I'll also post an anonymous form from time to time on X. My guest today to answer the question that I received is the co author of the book I wrote, Stolen Youth, my friend Bethany Mandel, who does the fantastic substack the mom wars, which you should go sign up for right now. Hi, Bethany. So nice to have you on.

[Bethany Mandel]

It's also a podcast, if people like podcasts.

[Carol Markowitz]

It's also a podcast. Yes, absolutely.

[Bethany Mandel]

We have to.

[Carol Markowitz]

It's great. The mom wars is so good. We read it in our house. I've had my kids read some of the pieces. It's really fantastic. Thanks. Bethany does a fantastic job there. All right. I got this question and I was literally like, I have to bring on Bethany to answer it because it. Well, let's get into it. You'll see.

[Bethany Mandel]

You didn't even preview it for me so far.

[Carol Markowitz]

I know I didn't. I like the not previewing it. Buck Sexton, who comes on here a lot to answer questions. He doesn't like to have the previews. And I'm kind of into it now, too, just to, you know, go in, go in blind. All right, here we go. Hi, Carol. I've been listening to your show since the first episode and I love the advice segments. I wish you did more of them. All right, maybe we will. I never thought I'd write in, but I feel like I'm losing my mind and need your thoughts. My husband and I live in a small city where he grew up. We're both committed Christians and moved here to be closer to his church. About a year ago, he stopped wanting to go as regularly. This was a big change for us, but I let it slide.

[Caller/Listener]

I, I, I still took the kids.

[Carol Markowitz]

Now age 4 and 2 most Sundays. Our plan was for me to homeschool the kids. And now my husband is saying he doesn't want to do that anymore either. Writing this all out now, I realize he sounds erratic, but he really is not. He's a great man, works hard, home every night. Nothing strange. When we talk about it, he says he still feels close to God without church and about the homeschooling. He says he wants the boys to go to the same small Christian school he went to because it's a great community. I'm just confused and our conversations aren't going anywhere. He is as loving and warm as ever, but just completely disrupting our plan for our Our lives. Do I roll with it or fight? Now, normally, when Bethany and I are on a segment together, I hope to go first because we're going to say the same thing. So I rather go.

[Bethany Mandel]

That's why we wrote a book together.

[Carol Markowitz]

Be the first one to go. And, you know, you gotta wing it for your answer. But, you know, because you've done me the honor of coming on my show, I'll let you take this one first.

[Bethany Mandel]

All right. So that's tricky. I mean, I think that it's a good sign that he wants the kids to go to a Christian school, that he doesn't want to send them public. And so he doesn't want to, like, totally forsake everything that they did agree upon. I kind of lean in favor of letting him. His reasoning is not bad. We went into, you know, being parents, not knowing what we wanted to do, and we changed. And Seth, my husband, changed also. And I think that you need that flexibility. And, you know, if he had said, I want to send the kids public, I think that's where I would say, stand up and fight.

[Carol Markowitz]

Interesting.

[Bethany Mandel]

Wanting to have them the same experience, the same Christian school. I think that's fair. I think that if there's, like, money concerns, those are really valid. And if. If that exists, I would say, let's just try kindergarten and see how it goes. Because that's how I kind of, like, sunk Seth. I, like, hooked him in. I was like, let's just see how kindergarten goes. And kindergarten was 2019 to 2020.

[Carol Markowitz]

Perfect.

[Bethany Mandel]

Turned out very easy. And we're like, I think we're seven years in. Yeah, I. I think I would. I think I would say to the husband, okay, but let's reevaluate at the end of kindergarten. Unless there's a money concern, which there just might be.

[Carol Markowitz]

Right. So it's interesting because my first instinct here is to be like, something's going on with this husband. And I'm glad that she took the time to say, no, I don't think so. Because, you know, my kids always say, you always think everyone's on drugs. And that that's. You know, I grew up in Brooklyn. Yes. I think everyone's on drugs. You know, so.

[Bethany Mandel]

But I will say, like, the fact that he wants them to go to a Christian school, that will get him back in.

[Carol Markowitz]

Right, right. That's what is giving me pause. It's not like he abandoned the church and then abandoned their plans for homeschooling and decided to go live a more secular life. I don't know what's going on with him and not going to church. Especially as she points out in the, in the question, they move to his city to be closer to his church. I don't know that I would find that very, you know, I think I'd be worried about that if I were her, because we made this move for that. So it's interesting because I was thinking, like, what if Seth had said to, no, Bethany, we won't be homeschooling these kids. Like, I need them to go to orthodoxy, Shiva and I, this has to be the way it goes. Like, what would you have done?

[Bethany Mandel]

I would have told him to get a job at a law firm because we can't afford it. And that's it. That's it. Like, it's. I was, I was doing the math with our kids and we would have to, we would have to bring in like hundreds of thousands more dollars.

[Caller/Listener]

Right?

[Bethany Mandel]

And the same life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I wasn't willing to have fewer for the sake of paying for private school, so. And he was on the same page. And so we were both there. But I mean, that's why I, that's why I caveated my answer with the money. Like, if tuition is too much of a stretch, then that's where you kind of stand up and say no.

[Caller/Listener]

Right.

[Bethany Mandel]

But I think that, like sending them to the private Christian school might actually work out for them because, you know, you can tell him, and this is probably not even wrong. Attending church is a requisite of sending our kids to this school. Sorry, it's out of my hands. Out of my hands.

[Carol Markowitz]

Right. So it's also interesting because she doesn't say, does she still stay at home? Will she have to go out and go get a job? None of that is addressed in the question. Which would be another change, right. If she was planning to be a stay at home mom and homeschool these kids, and now the husband is saying, well, no, I want them to go to this other school. What happens to her? Are they going to have more kids? I mean, there's obviously this, always with these kinds of questions, details that are not included. So, you know, I would say monitor the husband's behavior and general demeanor and see if there is something actually going on with him. It doesn't, I get, you know, I was joking. It doesn't actually have to be drugs. It could be any number of things. It could just be, you know, malaise. It could be anything.

[Bethany Mandel]

People change.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah, people change. Right. So that's the other thing I was going to say is that My husband and I got together with the plan that we would live in New York forever. And if one of us didn't want to do that, that would be crazy. Who would want to leave?

[Bethany Mandel]

Rounds for divorce.

[Carol Markowitz]

Rounds for divorce. Right. Here we are four years into our Florida life and obviously things changed. So my advice, watch the husband a little bit, but take it, you know, with a grain of salt that your plan is always going to be the plan.

[Bethany Mandel]

Yeah. If people are unconvinced about Florida, they should just look at the picture of the two of us side by side right now. I am so pale and you are golden.

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Am I?

[Carol Markowitz]

I'm also, I'm in a sweater cause it's freezing in my house. But yeah, we often when Mary Katherine and I record, she's like in a tank top because the heat's on in her, you know, in her D.C. area home. And I'm in a usually in a sweatshirt or a sweater because we have the AC set to like 68.

[Bethany Mandel]

I love it.

[Carol Markowitz]

Well, thank you so much for coming on. Bethany Mandel. Follow her ethanyshondark on the X plat and check out the mom wars, both the substack and the podcast. Thank you again, Bethany. We'll talk to you again soon.

[Bethany Mandel]

Sounds good. Thanks for having me.

[Carol Markowitz]

We're going to take a quick break and be right back on the Carol Markowitz Show.

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[Caller/Listener]

Hi.

[Carol Markowitz]

And welcome back to the Carol Markowitz show on iheartradio. My guest today is John Ashbrook, co host of the Ruthless Podcast. Hi John, so nice to have you on.

[John Ashbrook]

Hey Carol, it's great to be with you. I mean, just a, just a real treat to spend some time with you today.

[Carol Markowitz]

The pleasure is really all mine. I'm a big fan of the program and a big fan of yours for a long time. So I'm looking forward to getting to know a little bit more about you and Mary, Kathryn Ham and I were on Ruthless together with you guys.

[John Ashbrook]

Great show and I learned. So nice to have you here.

[Carol Markowitz]

I loved being on and you guys are such good hosts. But I learned that you're from Cincinnati, Ohio, and I have a sister in law from Cincinnati. And am I right to say that people who are from Cincinnati are like, really into Cincinnati or is it just like the two of you?

[John Ashbrook]

No, it's very, very fair to say. I mean, you've got, you have basically like the thought process of somebody from Cincinnati. And you know, a lot of other people from Ohio don't always consider Cincinnati as part of Ohio. They always say it's like a nation state.

[Carol Markowitz]

Oh, really? Like its own thing.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, its own thing. Its own thing. And you know what, you just sort of embrace it if you're from, if you're from Cincy. Actually, culturally, Cincinnati is very similar to Louisville, very similar to Indianapolis. So it is, it's a little bit different from the rest of the state. But, you know, we are who we are.

[Carol Markowitz]

I just don't see the same kind of like city pride from like Columbus or Cleveland and, and other cities, you know, of other states either. I just feel like Cincinnati really has something where the people who are from Cincinnati kind of want to get back to Cincinnati or see it as like this, you know, magical wonderland in which to live.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, well, it's a great town. I mean, you, you, you won't find a bigger fan than me. And I think a lot of it comes from the fact that there are a lot of very big families in Cincinnati, people who like associate the town with all of their cousins, all their, and their uncles and good times from growing up. And I mean, it is, it is a great place to grow up. Great place to raise a family. They've got some big companies in town and so I have friends who have moved in and like middle age to take jobs in the city and they're like, man, everybody seems to already know, have their group and have their friends and so. But it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a great place to grow up.

[Carol Markowitz]

But I love that. I love like places where people don't want to leave or want to come back to like that's that's, that's sort of what we're all looking for, right?

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, yeah, no, that's. That's exactly right. And I mean, you know, you will also find, I mean, you mentioned don't want to leave there. There is also a, a steady migration of people from Cincinnati who move down to the west coast of Florida when they become a certain age.

[Carol Markowitz]

Right, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

In Sarasota, Naples, Bonita, Fort Myer, you will find a lot of people who are from Cincinnati, probably a lot of Michigan, a lot of Midwesterners. But you, you sort of mig and reconnect with people who maybe didn't go to the same high school, but all are familiar.

[Carol Markowitz]

So how did you get into this thing of ours? How did you become a podcaster at Ruthless?

[John Ashbrook]

Well, it starts, I mean, I've worked in politics for 20 years. Back in the day, I was a driver for my local congressman, was my first job in politics, and then was a press secretary, actually the press secretary for conservative talk radio, back when that was kind of in its heyday. And Republicans wanted to make sure that they had relationships with these talk radio shows. And so I knew a lot of the producers, and I loved conservative talk radio, always loved it start to finish. I used to listen from Bill Bennett in the morning from six to nine to Laura Ingram from nine to noon, Rush Limbaugh noon to three, and then Sean Hannity three to six, and then Mark Levin six on. And so, you know, you spend enough time listening to them and getting familiar, you know, Hugh Hewitt, another great guy. You spend enough time listening to them, you sort of, you just develop an appreciation for how hard that job is and how enjoyable it can be. And so, you know, worked my way through Republican politics, was a consultant on a bunch of Senate races over the years. And when my buddies and I, the other guys on the Ruthless show, just sort of sitting around having lunch or hanging out together at one point. And I think you've heard this story before, but I'll tell you, I want.

[Carol Markowitz]

To hear it again. Tell me.

[John Ashbrook]

During COVID we used to finish our days on a Zoom Call, and we would bet racehorses and we would drink bourbon and try to make each other laugh. And at one point we were like, hey, why don't we just try to turn this into a show? And so in a lot of ways, Ruthless Podcast was a hobby that was developed during COVID that turned into something bigger. And, I mean, we had some ideas about starting a media company and everything, but really it germinated and came to full fruition during COVID And right on the heels of COVID we launched the show in October of 2020, right before the 2020 election. And we've been going ever since. 600 and some episodes.

[Carol Markowitz]

I love it. You know, is it weird making the transition from working in politics and, you know, being kind of anonymous to do you get recognized now A little bit.

[John Ashbrook]

You know, you on the Hill, especially, you know, Capitol Hill, a place I worked for so long, you always, you know, you spend so much time up there, and you think, oh, well, you know, put out a good press release, was a press secretary, and everybody's gonna be like, oh, great press release. But it's wild. You go back there as somebody who's doing podcasting, and people are like, o, no, I listen to the podcast. And so it is a lot of fun. It is different than political communications, where usually you're trying to sort of downplay the controversy. But on the show, you always love the controversy. You love the fight, no matter who's fighting, and you like talking about it, and what does each side think? And so that's a little different set of muscles that you've got to work. But it is so much fun, and we could not be having a better time than we do on our show.

[Carol Markowitz]

I think what you guys do so well, and what Mary Katharine Hamm and I definitely try to emulate on our show normally, is that you're providing information to your listeners, but you're also actively trying to be funny, which I don't think people do as much as they used to. Like, when I first got into writing, I think a lot of writers were trying to be funny in their serious topics, like Jonah Goldberg, Mark Stein. They all kind of, like, would have funny turns of phrases. And I think you guys do that so well, where you pair humor with seriousness. Do you feel like that?

[John Ashbrook]

It's very kind of you to say that, Carol, because, I mean, when you guys come on the show, you and M.K. i mean, we absolutely love it because you get the same sort of, like, cadence. You're interested in the same sort of things. You're interested in not taking yourselves too seriously. And that's what we do on our show, where it's like, there's so much content out there, particularly on the right over the last maybe 10, 15 years, where everybody wants to read you the Federalist papers. Everyone wants.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah, it's humorless.

[John Ashbrook]

It's like reading a college term paper. And that's not how Rush was, you know, and he was really the greatest. I Mean, he really set the tone for so many of us. And I would imagine you, I imagine MK and I know all the other guys on our show, remember, either driving around in the car with our parents or at some point in our lives, you're listening to EIB Network and you're laughing, you're getting information, and you've got a guy who is absolutely at the top of his game in broadcasting, changing media in ways that I don't think he ever thought he would at the very beginning. But over time, he really changed things, and a lot of that had to do with his humor and not taking things too seriously. So, you know, we're just emulating what we learned from the greats.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah, I really love that. What would you be doing if it wasn't this? Would you have a plan B that.

[Caller/Listener]

You would have pursued?

[John Ashbrook]

You know, when I was a kid, I wanted to be a fighter pilot and a pro baseball player as an adult.

[Carol Markowitz]

Too late. I don't know.

[John Ashbrook]

It's way too late for me on that. I mean, as an adult, I would love to be a coach or I'd love to be a pro golfer or something like that. I mean, but I actually absolutely love what we do with the show because we get to do it with our friends. And what people hear on our show is exactly what we're doing when the cameras are off. I mean, the same conversations where we don't cut anything on our show. So if I say something dumb, everybody laughs at me. But that's the way it is when you're with your friends. Nobody says everything perfectly every single time. And I think the audience really likes that. They relate to that. I mean, it adds a layer of authenticity that you don't always get with the, you know, the legacy media, where everything's perfect and read perfectly and everything is like, that's. It's not human. You know, people disagree on things. People have takes that don't come off right. And, you know, like, I feel like that's what the audience is really hungry for is some reality. You know, they know people aren't robots. They know people aren't perfect.

[Carol Markowitz]

Like, they want to get to know you. And they do do that on shows like yours, where they get to know you as a person, like somebody who has interests and hobbies outside of just giving your opinion on stuff.

[John Ashbrook]

Right.

[Carol Markowitz]

So, I don't know. I don't think it's too late for you to be a professional baseball player or a fighter pilot. Certainly not too late to be a pro golfer. You're Pretty into golf, right?

[John Ashbrook]

I love it. I absolutely love it. I mean, my hopes and dreams were the same as every other basic. Every other regular boy growing up, up in America, you know, in the time that we grew up. It's. It's not different from anybody else, and it's. It. It's a lot of fun because the guys who we. Who I do the show with, same hopes, same dreams when they were kids. And now we're. Now we're doing a show together and talking about our lives. And, you know, it's. Things change as you grow up. Things change as you, you know, you have kids and, you know, new challenges, new complications that you always heard about when you were a kid from your parents telling you things, and now you get to experience it in real life.

[Carol Markowitz]

I've only golfed once. I didn't really love my. The golfing outfits. I have to kind of, you know, peruse more. More possibilities.

[John Ashbrook]

We gotta change that Carol. We need to. We need to do like a Carol. Ruthless Fellas go golfing together.

[Carol Markowitz]

Do you. Do you guys sell the Ruthless merch golf outfit for women? Cause I feel like that would be a hit.

[John Ashbrook]

We're gonna start doing it now. I'm gonna have Michael Duncan sit on the sewing machine and start putting these things together.

[Carol Markowitz]

I love that. What are you most pro?

[John Ashbrook]

You know, you asked me this question before, and I was thinking about a lot of different things, but I have to tell you, sitting here right now, it is 100% my children. I've got three daughters, and I love these girls more than life itself. My oldest daughter, she's a singer. She has such a beautiful voice. She's 16 years old.

[Carol Markowitz]

Oh, wow.

[John Ashbrook]

And when she sings, it brings tears to your eyes. And so my wife and I, on weekends, we usually listen to music just to sort of wind down. And I always throw on something that she's sung that's sitting in my iPhone. She hates it when I do that, but I'm like, hey, I'm not allowed to listen to my favorite singer in my own house. And she is so talented. Carol, I cannot tell you how talented this girl is. She's so good. And then my second daughter has down syndrome, so she has got a little bit of a different track in life. But she is really sort of brings so much humor to our house. Brings so much life to our house and ways. And her takes on things are just so different than you would ever expect. She's always got us laughing. And then my youngest girl is really into basketball, really into sports right now. So she is, like all into her team and her friends, and so it's just so much fun.

[Carol Markowitz]

You really have the range. That's funny.

[John Ashbrook]

I do. It's so much fun watching them experience life and seeing things through their eyes and hearing their takes on everything and listening to them as they grow up. And it. Parenting is the greatest thing that could ever happen to a person. I mean, it really comes with its share of frustrations and it's obviously exhausting, but there is nothing better in life than kids.

[Carol Markowitz]

Absolutely. I feel like there's this messaging right now, you know, I think it's actually aimed at young men more than young women at this point. Like, it used to be more at young women, but there's been a collapse in the idea that young men should have kids. And I think that talking about how amazing parenting is, especially on shows like Ruthless, I think it goes a long way to changing that conversation. Do you see that? Like, do you, do you see that messaging aimed at men now?

[John Ashbrook]

Well, maybe a little bit. But, you know, we are who we are. Three out of the four of us have kids and you're sort of going through life at the same stage together and you sort of take it as it comes. And I don't think that you really have an appreciation for how much of an absolute blessing kids are until you have them. Until you've gone through the hard things to the point where you're like, you know what?

[Carol Markowitz]

You don't know.

[Caller/Listener]

Right.

[John Ashbrook]

Exactly. Until you're like, wow, that's actually funny. I can't believe they, you know, like, they add so much to life. It's just, it is such a life giving experience. Everybody has to, has to. And even if, you know, there's so many people who can't have kids, you know, but I know that they. I know several, several people who are in that boat but, like, surround themselves with nieces and nephews because they see how much life that just brings back to you in middle age.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah. I think that there's, you know, this push to portray it as joyless when it's one of the most joyful experiences a human can have.

[John Ashbrook]

And it's incredible.

[Carol Markowitz]

I hope that young people can avoid the messaging aimed at them because it's really. It's a negative. It's such a negative to believe something like that.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah. It is exhausting. But the exhaustion is worth it. The exhaustion is absolutely worth it.

[Carol Markowitz]

How old is your youngest?

[John Ashbrook]

My youngest is 11.

[Carol Markowitz]

Okay. Yeah. So you're a little bit past the not sleeping. I mean, your sleep never really goes back to normal. But you're not in the crying in the middle of the night.

[John Ashbrook]

Right. But the problems become more complicated and you have to really think about your answers to the questions. And thankfully, you know, my wife is a brilliant woman and she's always on point with the things that they're thinking. And like, I'm just a guy. I mean, I don't think from a girl's perspective, but she always does and she always knows the right thing to say.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah. And dads are so important. So I'm sure you do a great job.

[John Ashbrook]

Do what I can.

[Carol Markowitz]

We're going to take a quick break and be right back on the Carol Markowitz Show.

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[Carol Markowitz]

Give us a five year out prediction and it could be about anything at all.

[John Ashbrook]

I mean, I am, I'm hard pressed to predict anything with any degree of certainty. Five years out from today, I'd like to be able to say the Cincinnati Bengals are going to be in a Super bowl again. I'd like to be able to say Cincinnati Reds are going to go to the World Series. I'd like to be able to say that Republicans will hold control of government and then we're going to get America back on track. But all of that stuff is, you don't know. You know, life is such a day by day thing and you know, time marches on no matter what. And so I feel like five years out is such a hard thing.

[Carol Markowitz]

That's why we ask the hard questions on here.

[John Ashbrook]

You know, it's a very hard question, Carol. It's really tough. I mean, I can talk about, like, my hopes and wishes and my dreams, but I feel like, I guess the.

[Carol Markowitz]

Bengals, the Reds, and the Republican Party.

[John Ashbrook]

I mean, that's what I'm hoping. That's what I'm hoping. We'll see if it happens.

[Carol Markowitz]

You know, I'll say that you predicted the Bengals and the Reds and, you know, the Republican Party. That can't be your problem also, you know.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, right, right, right, right.

[Carol Markowitz]

Well, I've loved getting to know you a little bit more, and I think we should definitely go golf together, although I'm obviously terrible. Leave us here with your best tip for my listeners on how they can improve their lives.

[John Ashbrook]

I think the absolute best thing that I can say is you've got to unplug and you've got to just take some time. You got to put your iPhone down. You got to put Twitter down. You got to put the calls and the texts and everything down and just live life with those who are around you for some period of time. Maybe that's on Friday night. Put it down and just spend time with your family or spend time with your friends and actually interact with people in the way that you're supposed to interact them. It is so gratifying to spend time with people in real life and not on, you know, as much as I love X, as much as I love text messaging and calling, I love all of those things so much. But interacting with people in real life when you're not connected to a phone is just one of the best things that I think you can do. And it always energizes you in a way that you'd never expect.

[Carol Markowitz]

Yeah. Touching grass and living your life in real life.

[John Ashbrook]

Exactly.

[Carol Markowitz]

The best piece of advice possible. He is John Ashbrook. Check him out at the Ruthless podcast. Thank you so much, John, for coming on.

[John Ashbrook]

Thank you, Carol.

[Carol Markowitz]

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[Carol Markowitz]

This is an iheart podcast. Guaranteed human.