12 Days Of TCB: Not The Totem Pole!

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Commercial Break – Episode: "12 Days Of TCB: Not The Totem Pole!"

Release Date: December 20, 2024
Title: 12 Days Of TCB: Not The Totem Pole!

Hosts: Bryan Green and Chrissy Hoadley
Special Guest: Dr. Phil (Recorded Advertisement)

---

Introduction to the 12 Days of TCB

In this festive special episode, co-hosts Bryan and Chrissy kick off the "12 Days of TCB," a series of daily episodes running from December 13th through the 25th. They promise a marathon of fresh content filled with their signature whacky humor, engaging discussions, and interactive segments to keep listeners entertained throughout the holiday season.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"Happy holidays! We're gluttons for punishment, bringing you 12 days of nonstop Commercial Break action!"
[02:33]

---

Sponsorship Insights and Dr. Phil Collaboration

A significant portion of the episode delves into the hosts' experiences with paid sponsorships, particularly spotlighting their collaboration with Dr. Phil. Bryan discusses the challenges and humorous outcomes of paying high-profile personalities to promote their podcast.

Bryan Green:
"Dr. Phil didn't genuinely support us; he was paid to talk about the show. It’s like having paid friends."
[11:25]

Despite initial successes, such as increased traffic from Dr. Phil's endorsement, Bryan and Chrissy reflect on the authenticity and effectiveness of paid promotions, emphasizing the difference genuine enthusiasm makes versus scripted endorsements.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"If you listen closely, you'll know the difference between a product Brian is excited about and one he's not."
[11:27]

---

Parody Segment: Mountain Monsters Extravaganza

The heart of the episode features a comedic parody of the reality TV show "Mountain Monsters," where the hosts mimic the exaggerated antics of Bigfoot hunters. Characters like Buck and Huckleberry embark on absurd hunts for mythical creatures, blending slapstick humor with satirical commentary on reality TV tropes.

Chrissy Hoadley (as Narrator):
"We're chasing the Cherokee Devil—a Bigfoot with mystical powers who can control your mind."
[27:32]

The segment includes over-the-top scenarios, such as Buck's hilarious mishap involving a totem pole and his unexpected moment of vulnerability, providing plenty of laughs while poking fun at the show's formulaic approach.

Buck (Parodied Character):
"I saw her disappear into the shed. She's gone. She ghosted me—literally."
[35:00]

---

Charity Spotlight: National Coalition Against Domestic Violence

In the spirit of the holiday season, Bryan and Chrissy dedicate part of the episode to promoting charitable causes. They highlight the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, urging listeners to support women and children escaping abusive relationships. The hosts share personal anecdotes and emphasize the importance of community support during these challenging times.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"Abusive relationships tear down lives. Please donate to help provide shelter, clothing, and support to those in need."
[21:49]

They also encourage listeners to contribute to other featured charities, offering incentives like exclusive TCB swag for donations, fostering a sense of giving back among their audience.

---

Current Events Commentary: New Jersey Drone Phenomenon

Shifting gears, the hosts engage in a lively discussion about the surge in reported drone sightings over New Jersey. They dissect various theories, ranging from benign hobbyist drone operators to more outlandish notions of alien technology. Bryan expresses skepticism over the alien drone theory, attributing most sightings to overactive imaginations or pranksters.

Bryan Green:
"I don’t think these are UFOs. It’s just New Jersey drones—people messing around with drones from their mom's garage."
[54:59]

Chrissy adds her perspective, agreeing that without concrete evidence, the drone sightings are likely nothing more than human-made gadgets causing a stir.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"If there are thousands of sightings, someone will capture it on video. Until then, it’s just people with their drones going viral."
[57:57]

---

Engaging with Listeners and Social Media

Throughout the episode, Bryan and Chrissy actively encourage listeners to engage with them via social media platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and their website. They promote their YouTube channel for video content and invite fans to reach out through text or voicemail, fostering a strong community connection.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"Follow us on Instagram @thecommercialbreak and TikTok @CBpodcast. Join our community and stay updated with all the latest episodes!"
[21:25]

---

Conclusion and Future Content Teases

As the episode wraps up, the hosts tease upcoming content for the remaining days of their 12-day special. They hint at exploring vintage MTV dating shows like "The Love Connection" and promise special episodes for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Bryan and Chrissy express their gratitude to listeners for tuning in and supporting charitable causes.

Chrissy Hoadley:
"Stay tuned for more dating content and a very special Christmas finale. Thank you for being part of the TCB family!"
[59:36]

---

Notable Quotes

• Bryan Green:
  "Dr. Phil didn't genuinely support us; he was paid to talk about the show. It’s like having paid friends."
  [11:25]

• Chrissy Hoadley:
  "If you listen closely, you'll know the difference between a product Brian is excited about and one he's not."
  [11:27]

• Chrissy Hoadley (Mountain Monsters Parody):
  "Huckleberry, you all right? Are you Huckleberry now?"
  [48:44]

• Bryan Green:
  "I don’t think these are UFOs. It’s just New Jersey drones—people messing around with drones from their mom's garage."
  [54:59]

---

Listen to the full episode on your favorite podcast platform and join Bryan and Chrissy for a wild ride through comedy, commentary, and community spirit this holiday season!

Transcript

[Brian Green]

This episode is sponsored in part by Live Nation. All right, you're a fan of the commercial break, so I know you're a fan of comedy. And good news for you, some of the best comedians in the world are touring right now. In my humble opinion, the best way to see comedy is to see it live. It's that energy in the room, it's the infectious laughter, it's the sense that someone is doing a high wire act right in front of your face and at any moment the train can come off the tracks and, and that is always just as entertaining as when your favorite comedian sets the room on fire. Nasser and I have become big fans of watching live comedy. Never once have we walked out of a comedy show regretting the $300 we're about to pay the teenage babysitter to obsessively text her boyfriend and doom scroll on Instagram. Never once. Let me punch up a few of the comedians I know are on tour right now. There's the ever lovely Sarah Silverman, hilarious Brian Reig, and Chelsea Handler, who I kind of have a crush on, Sarah Milliken, Kevin Hart, the always funny Atsuko Okatsuka. And literal man of the hour, Sebastian Maniscalco. If that guy doesn't give you a tickle, you just don't own a funny bone. There are all kind of live shows, there are all kind of venues, and there are all flavors of comedy. So head over to livenation.comcomedy to get your tickets today. That's livenation.comcomedy. times are tough. The entire world stressed out. You deserve it. Go see some live comedy. Live nation.com comedy and thanks to Live Nation for being a sponsor of another kind of comedy show. The the Commercial Break. This episode of the Commercial Break is sponsored by Ring. The holidays are almost here, and between traveling, hosting family and finding the perfect gift, it's such an exciting, busy and yes, sometimes stressful time. Ring helps you stay connected to the home for all the merry moments. Even when you're on the go with Ring, you've got the whole home covered. Their video doorbells alert you when gifts arrive and you can even chat with the delivery people to let them know where to leave the packages. The indoor cam. It's a game change so easy to set up. You can use it to check in on your pets when you're away. And with two way talk, you can even talk to them. Plus, if you want some privacy, you can just flip the manual cover to turn off the camera and microphone. Wherever the holidays take you, Ring makes sure that you're always home for the holidays, so head to Ring.com to find the latest deals on Ring video, doorbells, cams, and alarm kits. Ring makes the perfect gift for everyone on your list. And thanks to Ring for being a sponsor of the commercial break.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hey, Chrissy.

[Brian Green]

Best to you.

[Christina]

Best to you, Brian.

[Brian Green]

Best to you out there in the.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Podcast universe and happy holidays.

[Brian Green]

Sometimes podcasts like ours will take off.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A lot of time during the holidays, but not us. We're gluttons for punishment.

[Brian Green]

So we have the 12 days of TCB coming at you December 13th through the 25th. Brand new episodes every single day and.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Live fresh episodes during the entire holiday season.

[Brian Green]

As the great Clark Griswold once said.

[Christina]

Holy. Where's the Tylenol?

[Brian Green]

Find it quick and join us this.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Entire holiday season for brand new episodes of the commercial break. Giving gifts fills me with joy. Wrapping up each little toy I so brightly.

[Christina]

Ooh.

[Nasser]

And ah.

[Christina]

Now what do I get my brother in law?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

The next episode of the commercial break starts now.

[Christina]

Ding dong. Happy birthday, Jesus.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Ah, yeah. Dancers and prancers, welcome back to the the 12 days of TCB. I'm Brian Green.

[Brian Green]

This is the Ellen to Mike Clark.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chrissy.

[Christina]

Best to you, Brian.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Best of you out there in the podcast universe. Our marathon continues. Chrissy.

[Brian Green]

I think we're doing very well.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

How are you holding up?

[Christina]

It's a marathon, not a sprint.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Are your lips chafed or anything? Do I need to get you some lipstick, some chapstick? Do you need water hydration?

[Christina]

I've got that.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A shit bag. Do you need anything? You know those marathoners?

[Christina]

An eggnog.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, there you go. Do you have eggnog? Really in there? I wish you did. That'd be a lot. It'd be a lot cooler if you did, bro. You know those marathoners, they just shit on themselves.

[Christina]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

So I'm gonna do that. Yeah. When we get to day number nine.

[Christina]

Or ten, we'll just wear diapers.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What's that?

[Christina]

We'll just wear diapers.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Listen, don't knock it till you tried it. You know, there's. There are a lot of people. This was a thing on. I forgot. Which show? The Stern show. So one of the guys there like to go to heavy metal concerts, but he did not want to pee. He was. He would drink a lot of beer. He did not want to go and pee and miss his favorite song. So he admitted on air that he would wear diapers. Now it's a thing. They are making Diapers for concerts.

[Christina]

Rock diapers.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Rock, yes. Rock Dick diker. Rock Dick Diapers.

[Nasser]

Is it like the same company as Liquid Death or something?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It is the guy. The guy. Super weird Liquid Death. And then it's like, I don't know, in the spirit of Lemmy or something like that. Who knows? I saw the advertisement for it, thought it was a joke. Joke. But it's not a joke. Listen, it's just an adult diaper with a. With leather. With leather. So, yes, you change out the diaper and then you. It's got a leather with a. Like a satanic cross on it.

[Christina]

Like a leather. Like a wrestling belt?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, kind of, but it's more of a thong with a satanic cross on the front of it. Oh, you know, the six sided pentagram or whatever it is. Whatever the Satanists are into these days, Whatever the paganists are into.

[Christina]

I recommend that sponsorship for Jeff to look into for the festival.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hey, listen, Liquid Death is a big.

[Christina]

No, not Liquid Death.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know, but they're the company that I think made it as a joke, but now it's real. Now people are admitting that they wear diapers to concerts so they don't miss out. Listen, I have. In 2025, I have already planned to go to more concerts than I have in like 10 years total. I've bought tickets to so many concerts and. Yeah, but I am at the age where even if I don't drink a lot of beer, I might need the diapers just so I don't miss half the concert. That's just part of what you deal with when you get my age. When you're getting your bell rung four to five times a year. How many times does Jeff get his bell rung a year? This really made me think yesterday we were talking about the bell ringing. Yeah. How many times has Jeff had his bell rung, do you think?

[Christina]

I don't know. I'll have to ask.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Does he still get it done?

[Christina]

I don't think it still happens.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay, good. I wanted to recommend another document.

[Christina]

Yeah, no, we were talking about years and I thought that was weird, but you confirmed that it was not weird. And so, yeah, it wasn't weird, but it doesn't happen anymore.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It wasn't weird back then. It's all of a sudden weird now, which makes me think it really was weird in the first place. It was probably weirder when it was happening than it's not happening. But what are you gonna do when a doctor tells you to bend over.

[Christina]

And, yeah, you're at their mercy?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Whistle Dixie. That's what you do. Take a deep breath. Relax, Brian, relax. Relax your anus. Speaking of anus. So the other day we were talk about Dr. Phil, and speaking of doctors and anus, I told you that Dr. Phil had done a series of. I mean, you remember this? He had done a series of commercials for the commercial break.

[Christina]

Of course.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

So one of the ways you can grow your podcast is to dump a whole shitload of money into having other podcast influencers types to talk about your show. And obviously it's a paid sponsorship. It happens during the commercial. So it's, you know, it's not like they're in. It's not like they actually like the show. It's like they're being paid to talk about the show.

[Christina]

Right. We're paying them.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes. So one of our first, like, famous people that ever talked about the commercial break because we paid them was Dr. Phil on his little podcast that. I can't remember what it was, but he has a couple different podcasts, and one of those, we managed to negotiate a deal with him. And unbelievably, it brought us quite a bit of traffic, which was surprising, or not surprising, depending on how you look at it. I dug deep in the commercial break archives and I actually found. Because I'm religious about keeping every single thing you are, I deleted that. I deleted the Dr. Phil commercial. But airplay or airdrop or air. Whatever it is. The what is that? The air icloud kept it for me. The air icloud kept it for me. And I didn't want to disappoint the listeners. I wanted to follow up on this. One of the. One of the benefits of having Christina here is that she reminds me that I say something and then we have to follow through on it. Thank you so. Thank you, Christina.

[Christina]

I've been saying that, and you just have been brushing me aside for years.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You're easy to ignore. Christina's new to the group. I don't want to.

[Christina]

You're trying to impress.

[Nasser]

You guys are showing off.

[Brian Green]

I don't want to let her know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What an asshole I am quite yet. I have a. There's a whole thing with the ladies. You know, I put my best foot forward for at least three months before I let you know what an actual shithead I am. So, Christina, on page eight, I think.

[Nasser]

I've got it queued up.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Got it queued up.

[Nasser]

I'm ready.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Ladies and gentlemen, I want to present to you the. I think this is the very first. Read that Dr. Phil. Let's listen to the excitement in Dr. Phil's voice as he talks about Ghost fuckers. Go.

[Christina]

I can't wait.

[Dr. Phil]

Hey, I want to take a minute to thank our brand new sponsor, the Commercial Break comedy podcast, for supporting the show. It's like a real life commercial break from all the serious things we're dealing with lately. That's why I recommend you take a list to the commercial break. And they paid us a lot of money for us to talk to you about the show. Two longtime friends, Brian and Chrissy, get in the studio and discuss their friendship stories from their personal life. And they take a deeper look at some of the absurd trends and topics they find on the Internet. Now, the commercial Break has new episodes each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday on all podcast players. And full episodes and daily clips available on the YouTube channel at YouTube.com thecommercialbreak or you can visit tcbpodcast.com for more information. That's tcbpodcast.com so when you have a chance, take a listen to our new paid friends on the commercial break.

[Christina]

Anywhere you'd like to listen to your.

[Dr. Phil]

Podcast or just visit tcbpodcast.com that is.

[Christina]

What we got and definitely emphasized paid. They have paid us.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

They have paid us. They are paid friends. To be fair to Dr. Phil, I actually wrote a sample script and I said, if you haven't listened to this show, you can tell him that we. So he took my cue from that. But just listen to the enthusiasm at Dr. Phil's. The commercial break. The commercial break. Our new paid friends over the commercial break. By the way, those dentures, Is that what I'm hearing? Am I hearing the dentures when. Let's play it one more time. Is it on? Stop. Start.

[Nasser]

I don't know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Dr. Phil]

Hey, I want to take a minute to thank our brand new sponsor, the Commercial Break Comedy Podcast, for supporting this show.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Comedy podcast. I think those are dentures.

[Christina]

He speaks.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You do?

[Christina]

I think it's like a thick tongue.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He does have a thick tongue. If I've ever seen a tongue. I've never seen a tongue so thick on a man.

[Nasser]

Got a thick tongue.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

That's what she said. Hey, I mean, that's what you get. So when we were talking about paying spot paying influencers the other day to talk about our show, that's kind of what you get. So I even think if we could drum up $3.23 million to get Cristiano Ronaldo to talk about us, I'm sure what we would get was they paid me to say commercial break.

[Christina]

Exactly.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's terrible.

[Christina]

They paid us.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. And then you wonder why these things kind of, you know, sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. Dr. Phil, we had a stroke of luck. There are other people that we have paid that we've not had such luck. It will go remain nameless because they just won't get another order from us. But that's the world of paid influencing. And that is why 99.9% of the time when people ask us to do commercial reads for their podcast, I just say no. Because unless it's something that I'm really excited about listening to, it's really. It would be really hard for me to give it my full gusto. If you listen closely, you will know the difference between a product or service that Brian is excited about and a product or service that Brian is not excited about. If you listen to those commercial reads closely enough. But I never say I'm a. They've paid us a lot of money to do this. Thank you, Dr. Phil, for all your kindness throughout the years. I mean, listen, can you fault the guy? Dr. Phil kind of took a weird left right turn over the last couple of years. I was never like the world's biggest Dr. Phil fan. My mother was the world's biggest Dr. Phil fan. When Dr. Phil offshot from Oprah and had his own show, daytime tv. Daytime tv. He was the king of daytime TV for a long time when he, you know, he was like a cow doctor, I think he was like a bovine doctor. And then Oprah got sued for saying that meat was murder or something along those lines. That was a big deal. And Dr. Phil showed up in her defense. And then somehow, some way, some shape, some form, he ended up on Oprah. I mean, literally, the guy ended up on Oprah giving people advice.

[Christina]

Yep. So he went from there like this straight talk.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Christina]

He had this kind of thing.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He had a way to cut the mustard, Chrissy. And at first on the Dr. Phil show, it was. It seemed like he was legitimately trying to help people with legitimate family. It did issues, but I don't know.

[Christina]

And then it dovetailed like they all do.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Then it went to Jerry, like season number three. It went to Jerry Springer level craziness. He. And I think we've had some of the most. Do you know the. Who's that girl? Catch me outside, Cash me outside. Do you know the cash me outside girl? Isn't she like a famous musician now? You don't know. Oh, ok. I thought you were looking at me like you knew what I was Saying.

[Nasser]

Well, I know who she is.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, the Cash me outside girl, I.

[Nasser]

Think has Cash me outside, how about that?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, Cash me outside. How about that? She has become super famous in the social media circles and the reason why is because she literally told Dr. Phil, catch me outside. And what she meant by that was, I'll kick your ass. Catch me outside because I'll kick your ass. It turned into one of the most bouty, rowdy, insane shows ever. And Dr. Phil, I think, in my opinion, lost any kind of credibility that TV psychologist would have otherwise had. But it's high entertainment if you watch it for just for that.

[Nasser]

Wait, she's Bhad Baby. I did not know that was her.

[Christina]

Oh, I did not know that either. So I do know. Bad Baby.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Bad Baby is super famous, right?

[Nasser]

That has taken me for a ride.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Did you know that she got her start in the Dr. Phil show?

[Nasser]

No, I thought, I thought they were two separate people.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

No, it all started on the Dr. Phil show. Unless I'm mistaken. Are we really connecting these two together?

[Nasser]

Yeah, it says on Wikipedia during her appearance on the talk show Dr. Phil in September 2016, she uttered the phrase catch me outside. How about that?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Wow. Wow.

[Nasser]

For which she became something, something, something. Because I'm just clicking on it now. Best known.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

She became best known for her appearance on Dr. Phil but then became Bhad Baby and now and then she had.

[Nasser]

A debut single in 2017 called these hoe. These ho h e a u x.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

These hoe h a u X. Yeah, she spelled ho like you spell faux.

[Nasser]

No, no. H E A U X H E.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A U S. Like, like I guess.

[Nasser]

People would say like go tigers in LSU or something.

[Christina]

Yeah, like a New Orleans, Louisiana kind of thing.

[Nasser]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What world are we living in? What insane world are we living in?

[Christina]

I can't keep up.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think I saw somebody, I was reading an article the other day and literally I read someone's name. It had a dollar sign and an asterisk in it. How do you say dollar sign? Asterisks.

[Christina]

Dollar.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Thanks, Chrissy. Dollar, Ass Dollar.

[Christina]

I don't know. That's the way I would say.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You are just damning. Unless you are super rich and super famous and you're going to pass that wealth down to your children. You are absolutely dooming your child to a world, to a miserable life if you put a dollar sign and an asterisk in their name. Of course, maybe they chose that. Maybe that's what they chose. People want to be individuals right now and that's why the Cash Me Outside Girl has made a career out of it and we're still suffering the 12 days of TCB.

[Christina]

I was going to say, I can't quite fault Dr. Phil for going down the road of that he did because there's only so much content.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, that's true. And he has five days a week, thousands of episodes. Dr. Phil has to have thousands of episodes. I. I fault us for Dr. Phil. I fault us because, yes, he was a straight talking, like, you know, no nonsense kind of dad figure. Right. He was a parental figure, I think, to millions of people on television who would literally cut through the muscle.

[Christina]

It was refreshing at the time.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It was refreshing to hear someone not tipped and to hear a therapist type not tiptoe around things and be sensitive about your feelings, but just tell you how. Call it like he saw it, but that quickly turned into some kind of muddled fucking mess.

[Christina]

And yeah, that's what people want to see.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, that's absolutely what they want to see. Maury Povich was a respected reporter at cbs. He was CVS at cbs, at the pharmacy. He was a respected CBS reporter until he started doing paternity tests on tv. And that's what he is best known for. And people fucking love it. They tune in by the millions to see are you the father? Which is amazing to me. It's amazing.

[Christina]

Well, look at what we love on tlc.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes, but I do have to say this. No, there's nothing to say. It's all the same. I'm not. Listen, I'm not saying I'm not part of the problem. I am part of the problem. I've watched Dr. Phil. I paid Dr. Phil. I paid him to talk about me. I paid Dr. Phil to talk about me. And 90 Day Fiance is just one step remaining. Who's the father?

[Christina]

It's a distant cousin.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Because everybody on 90 Day Fiance is. Is one step removed from being a guest on the Maury Povich show. Let's be honest about it.

[Christina]

Yeah, they all should.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We were just watching an episode before we started recording here, and it's just the last resort. Yeah, the last resort is right. Because none of these couples have a chance from the beginning. And why we're even pretending that they do is beyond me. But. Okay, let's go there. This is all. This is where we've gotten to. We've gotten to this because we collectively soak in the drama. We love to think that we're doing better than other people.

[Christina]

Exactly.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

That is, we love to see other people's train wrecks because it makes Our train wreck not feel so damaging. And we like tits and ass. That's it. That is it. Dollars, Tits, ass, and dollars with eight spelled D, a U. Dollar sign. Dollar sign. Asterisk, Awar dawa sign. Okay, so, Chrissy, today for the 12 days of TCB, we're going to dip our toe back in the water of the mountain monsters because. I'm sorry. Yeah. We clicked toes when I said that. Look at that. Look at us playing footsie under the table. You see me, Jeff? Cash me outside. Dollar sign, asterisk, Explanation point. Explanation point. We're gonna dip our toes back in the mountain monsters water because we reviewed for the 12 days of TCB one of the episodes where they were running around chasing the Cherokee bigfoot, the Cherokee mind melting monster or whatever he's called. The Cherokee devil. The Cherokee dill. Yeah.

[Christina]

And there had been like a rogue team or something involved the rogue team.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

But they had met up and I don't know. I'm not even sure I've got the same episode. I don't know, but I think I do. It's so confusing. So the way that they split up these episodes and propagate them online is really confusing. Sometimes it'll be a day old, but it's from season one. And then sometimes it'll be five months old, but it hasn't come out yet. It's really weird. Anyway, the mountain monsters. I promised that if I could find part number two of this that we would play it. So let's.

[Christina]

I think you found it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think I found it. In either which way it's going to be entertaining. You know it is. So let us do that. Let us go ahead and let's do that. We will do that. I was trying to think about which charity I'm so gracious today. Hold on one second.

[Christina]

Aspca.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes, we were highlighting, but there was.

[Christina]

I sent you one this morning. There was like a feeding America.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes, there is, but there was a. Give me one second. Can you and Christina talk for a second while I.

[Christina]

What's up, Christina?

[Nasser]

You know, just living. Just thriving over here.

[Christina]

Living that producer life.

[Nasser]

Yeah, it's good back here. I like not having the camera on me. I like making you guys the stars.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Thank you. Yeah.

[Christina]

A camera on me is not too bad. As long as I can see.

[Nasser]

Not too bad. Not today.

[Christina]

Nope.

[Nasser]

You know, Chrissy hates when we take. When we take her emotional support screen.

[Christina]

Away just to make sure.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know. Chrissy got so freaked out.

[Christina]

Crazy or at a bad angle. It's little things.

[Nasser]

We're back here telling her, fix your hair on the left.

[Christina]

Yeah, yeah. You got a little cowlick up there.

[Nasser]

Yeah. Looks good though.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. I was gonna say we should add on to Christina's roster of responsibilities to make sure your hair looks good.

[Nasser]

Last looks.

[Christina]

Yes.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay. Want to get this wrong? So over the break, I'll check it and we'll make sure that we let you know and put it in the link in the show notes. It's basically, it's an organization that supports women who have been abused and the children that they care for when they're leaving those relationships. This is a super important cause. We donate a lot to the women's shelter down the street.

[Christina]

We do too.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We donate anything that we have used or left over or, you know, we bought two of them or whatever happens, we will donate over there. This is an super important cause because abusive relationships tear down lives. They destroy children and women's lives and men too, to be honest with you. But right now we're focusing on the women and so we're gonna put a link in the show notes to this charity that does just that. They provide shelter, clothing, food and assistance getting back on their feet and finding their way in the world without all the drama. So please support that cause and also any of the other causes that we've talked about in the 12 days of TCP. If you feel so inclined, you can certainly take a screenshot that you're donating, send it our way and we'll make sure that we get you some extra TCB swag. Let's take a break and we'll be back with the mountain monsters.

[Nasser]

Hi. You know what time it is, so let's get to it. Pull that phone out of your pocket and follow us on Instagram hecommercial break and on TikTok for now, I guess CBpodcast. You can also find all of our video content that we're filming in our brand new [e-mail] TheCommercialBreak so check it out and throw us a follow a like a comment, whatever you can spare. If you want to get in touch with us, you can always text us or call us and leave us a voicemail at 212-4333 TCB. Now I have one last request. During the 12 or 263 days of TCB. Check out our featured charities and donate to them if you can this holiday season. Alright, let's take a listen to our sponsors and get back to the show.

[Brian Green]

This episode is sponsored by pre alcohol from ZBiotics. I am not one to imbibe a whole bunch anymore. I've got 13 to 15 children, checklists to get done and jobs to do. But even with moderation, I don't bounce back like I used to from a night of drinking. I find myself having to make that choice. Can I have a great night or a great responsible day tomorrow? A tough choice to make indeed. That is until I found Pre Alcohol Zebiotics Pre Alcohol Probiotic Drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. It was invented by a PhD scientist to tackle rough mornings after drinking, and.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Here'S how it works.

[Brian Green]

When you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in your gut. It's this byproduct, not dehydration, that's to blame for that rough next day. Pre alcohol produces an enzyme to break down this byproduct. And just as long as you remember to take pre alcohol as your first drink of the night, then drink responsibly. You'll feel your best tomorrow. We've now been out for a few nights of drinking work where pre alcohol is the first thing that I drink. Let me tell you when I can get up in the morning, take care of my 12 to 13 children, still record an episode of the commercial break, and make it to bedtime with a little bit of energy left in the tank to watch bad television. I know that pre alcohol has done its job and with the holiday season upon us, I know I'm going to be consuming just a little bit more alcohol than usual. But with pre alcohol I can stay on track and not let the holiday season throw me off course. Go to zbiotics.com commercial to learn more and get 15% off off your first order when you use the code commercial at checkout. Zebiotics is backed by a 100% money back guarantee, so if you're unsatisfied for any reason, they'll refund your money, no questions asked. Remember to head to zebiotics.com commercial and use the code COMMERCIAL at checkout for 15% off. Thank you to Zebiotics for being a sponsor of the commercial break and for making my mornings after drinking just a little bit easier. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Whether you love true crime or comedy, celebrity interviews or news, you call the shots on what's in your podcast queue. And guess what? Now you can call them on your auto insurance too. With the name your price tool from Progressive, it works just the way it sounds. You tell Progressive how much you want to pay for car insurance and they'll show you coverage options that fit your budget. Get your quote [e-mail] to join the over 28 million drivers who trust Progressive Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law.

[Christina]

Looking to improve your diet in the new year? Try seeing a personal dietitian with Nourish. Nourish has hundreds of dietitians who specialize in a variety of health concerns, including weight loss, gut health and more. Meet with your dietitian online and message them anytime through the Nourish app. Nourish accepts hundreds of insurance plans. 94% of patients pay $0 out of pocket. Find your personal [e-mail] that's usenourish.com.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence is the charity that we were discussing and they support local and national foundations that help women and children who have survived abusive relationships or abusive family situations. So please donate. It's a super important cause. My father really installed this, instilled this into us. He had four boys, so he instilled into us that touching, being in a relationship that's abusive is never a good thing.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And he really. By hitting me, my father made me realize that hitting was not good. I don't know any other way to say it. Anyway, let's transition from the National Coalition against Domestic Violence into the National Coalition against violence or for violence against monsters.

[Christina]

That's right.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Last time we left the mountain monsters, they were chasing that Cherokee devil. They had split up and then come back.

[Huckleberry]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Who fucking knows? They were chasing the mind melting Cherokee devil. You ready to get into this?

[Christina]

I am.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay. Just wanted to talk with you.

[Buck]

We're in Ash County, North Carolina, and we're going after the Cherokee devil. Legend has it that this Bigfoot is the ultimate hunter and has mystical powers. It can hear your thoughts and control your mind. And based on.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Sounds like the last woman I dated. Buck, he's an expert caller. He's an expert caller.

[Christina]

Did they change his. Did they, did they change his. His title, Chrissy. A lot? I think because I don't always remember him.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think when you're doing such important work, it's not the title that matters, it's what you're doing. Chrissy, we don't get lost in the details. And yes, every single episode they change the titles for these guys. Trapper, Professional Bigfoot Hunter. But now he's an expert caller. I don't even know what that means. What's an expert caller?

[Christina]

Calling the monster.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Never once heard Buck call the monster. Never Once.

[Christina]

Oh, that's why it's surprising.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hello, monster.

[Buck]

This isn't legend. It's fact.

[Christina]

It's fact.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's fact because I said so. My name isn't Donald J. Trump.

[Christina]

That's fact.

[Buck]

I'm hoping Huckleberry's in there. That's where I end up. I don't know how or why, but that's where I ended up.

[Christina]

Huh.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And I don't mean by Huckleberry, I don't mean the person. I mean the bush. I am hungry.

[Buck]

Whoa. Look, look, look, look, look, look, look. Do you see that?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Do you see that? No, No, I didn't see anything.

[Nasser]

Remember last time we left off at the. At the. In the hut with all their manila folders and their names? I think that's where he's going.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, that's where we're at.

[Nasser]

Okay, I'm ready.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, there we are. Yep, you're right. I did find the second part to this I' myself.

[Christina]

Good job.

[Buck]

Where'd she go?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's in a hut that's 2 foot by 2 foot. Yet he's doing a thorough and exhaustive search for a woman.

[Christina]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think he would see her if she was there. He's looking around like she's under the floorboard.

[Trapper]

She was right here.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Just.

[Buck]

Where'D she go? Did you see her?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

No, I didn't.

[Buck]

There's that little Indian girl.

[Christina]

Oh, I forgot. He was looking.

[Buck]

I walked up to that shack and there's no.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I walked up to that shack and there was no way that little Indian girl could get past me as I. I shaded most of the door. Now, did you see her?

[Buck]

Did you see her mistake in what I seen? I seen it the other night. There's that little Cherokee Indian girl.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Why can't anyone just use the word saw? I know you don't seen something. You saw something.

[Buck]

There's nowhere for her to go. She was standing right there in the building. And I walked right up to it, and she's gone. She vanished. There's no exit. There's no way out of there. But she vanished. She's gone.

[Christina]

It's a fact.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's a fact. That Cherokee mine hunting monster is chasing little Indian girls around the woods. Woods into this here whack shack. This is the whacking shack.

[Christina]

Oh, it's messing with him. It's messing with Buck.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It is. Really? With Buck's head. Yeah. I bet his therapy bills are high. Huckleberry.

[Trapper]

Spooky Damn place.

[Christina]

I feel like that other guy should be the caller. Yeah, he's the one that yells.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, he's the one that yells and screams. But he said it's a spooky damn place. Is that any different than any of the other spooky damn places you've been? I mean, they all seem pretty spooky to me.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Out in the middle of the woods at night. And why are they always hunting at night? Why don't they just do something during the day? Have you ever heard of a drone? Take a page out of New Jersey's.

[Christina]

Monsters sleep at night, you know, or they sleep during the day. I meant they do. Chrissy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Chrissy knows it's facts.

[Brian Green]

Hold up, hold up, hold up.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I spy with my one good eye. Mountain monster high size.

[Christina]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm.

[Christina]

I'm really thinking that if, you know, if they want to get an elite group together to go and capture something like this.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I've said the from the beginning. These aren't the people, but said this from the beginning. You're so right.

[Christina]

I'm Picturing Like Navy SEALs, you know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm picturing like an entire, you know, like the 1st Infantry Division, you know what I'm saying? Surround the place. Turn on the high beams.

[Christina]

Get the drones.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Get some drones. Maybe a couple of those thermal imaging cameras, not the kind you buy at Walmart for $10, but the actual thermal imaging. And then you get some people with some experience, you know, people who go to. To college for this type of stuff. And they know about cryptology and.

[Christina]

Trained.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, trained. But no, you've got three guys who spend most of their time, let's be honest, brewing moonshine out in the woods in the middle of the night with loaded guns, running around blindly pointing them at things that they don't know. And they always seem to have a mental breakdown now in every episode. This has taken its toll on these guys, I think. All the fame and fortune, the mountain monsters.

[Christina]

Maybe they should see Dr. Phil.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, listen, it would not.

[Christina]

Dr. Phil and mountain monsters.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

After Dr. Phil's recent turn, I would not be surprised to see Huck or Buck on one of his shows. What the hell is he doing?

[Trapper]

We just came across.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Why is everyone just standing here? Why don't we go say hi to him? So here's the thing. They've now. They're now pointing their flashlights at Buck, who is sitting on the forest floor with his back turned to them. My question is, why not just go talk to Buck? Why are they all whispering behind his back?

[Trapper]

He looks to me like he's in that same trance that I Seen him the other night. I gotta ease down there, Trance, and make sure we get a hold of him.

[Christina]

Oh, Trapper is the team leader.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, Trapper's the team leader.

[Christina]

He got an upgrade.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I've taken five to 10 minutes out of this important time to talk to you. The camera before I go check on Buck, who's probably dead.

[Buck]

Seen it.

[Trapper]

You seen the Turkey Devil just walking.

[Buck]

Up that ridge up to the shack?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's got his penis hanging out. I know why they call him the Cherokee Devil. It's too big.

[Buck]

There she was.

[Christina]

Is the little girl the Cherokee devil?

[Buck]

Little Cherokee girl.

[Trapper]

The one that grabbed it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Little Cherokee devil cakes. You can buy them at the corner store. Need them now.

[Buck]

She's inside the shed.

[Trapper]

Did she take a hold of you?

[Buck]

She disappeared.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

She wouldn't call me back. We matched on Tinder. We matched on Tinder and she ghosted me. Literally.

[Trapper]

Buck, seen that little Cherokee girl again? She disappeared in that damn shed. There's something about that damn shed.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Damn shed. The damn shed. That whacking shed. I knew I should have torn it down years ago.

[Buck]

15 yards away. When I seen her, I went straight in. Straight in. She wasn't in there.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

She's gone. She broke my heart. He looks like he just got back from a bad date.

[Christina]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Am I right about this?

[Nasser]

In this movie, looks like a widow who lost her husband in the war.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's gone. I know he's gone. I saw her. She's gone.

[Buck]

He's overwhelmed.

[Trapper]

Buck, I'll tell you what we gotta do.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Here's what we're gonna do. I'm gonna open mouth, kiss you.

[Christina]

He just opened his mouth.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm gonna open mouth, kiss you, and everything's gonna be okay. We're all gonna carry you back to the car and then we'll get you some hot cocoa. Can't handle no more. I know.

[Trapper]

I know.

[Buck]

That's right, Buck.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm trying. Buck need Huggies. Does Buck need kissies? Huggies.

[Trapper]

We gotta get Buck out of here.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Trapper]

We gotta find Huck first.

[Buck]

I wanna find Huckleberry.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Trapper]

Let's start sweeping these ridges.

[Christina]

Huckleberries, Missy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm gonna start sweeping the ridges for huckleberries. You stay here and weep like a child.

[Christina]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He is crying.

[Nasser]

Men can cry too, Brian.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know. Hey, listen. I am a weeper myself. I know about crying. I cry at songs. I cry, you know, I'm one of those guys, you know, Emotion overcomes me. I'm not afraid to cry. I just don't know how to do it on command. Like this. Like Buck does. Yeah.

[Trapper]

Together. We gotta take care of Buck. Okay.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm fine.

[Trapper]

We gotta take care of each other.

[Dr. Phil]

Just wanna get Huckleberry.

[Trapper]

Yeah, let's Huckleberry for this.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Gets worse.

[Trapper]

He has to be here. Now that we've got Buck back with the team, our number one researcher.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What is he? Researcher. Researcher. Researcher. Where's his pad of paper? What's he researching?

[Trapper]

Responsibility is to find Huckleberry. He's lost. He's somewhere in these woods. We gotta find him. Huckleberry.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Huckleberry. Number one. Huckleberry number two. Huckleberry. Ah, whatever. Is there a Huckleberry out there?

[Buck]

Hope he's not in the same shape I was in.

[Trapper]

We need to go right back to where that evil devil entered Huckleberry's mine. In that totem pole area. That's where we'll.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's likely. We need to go right back into the arms of the murderous monster in order to find our friend. Because nothing says be a friend like getting yourself killed.

[Trapper]

Additionally, find our Huckleberry.

[Christina]

I forgot there's a totem pole involved.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, there's a totem. Chrissy. This is the creepiest out. This is the creepiest mountain monsters episode we have seen this week in here.

[Trapper]

That's where we found that totem pole. Right here. The son of a bitch is gone.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What? Jeff, look.

[Trapper]

We went right back to where we found that damn totem pole and now it's gone. Completely gone.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's totally gone. Did anybody else catch that? It's gone. He went from. He went from south Kentucky accent to Boston. Yeah. To like New England. Like Chesapeake Bay.

[Trapper]

Disappear. Son of. Was probably about 14 inches in diameter. 8 foot tall. Maybe 10 foot tall Willie. It was. Damn.

[Christina]

10 foot tall Willie.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A 10 foot. That Willie was about 14 inches diameter. 8ft tall. That damn Willie. Biggest Willie I've ever seen. No wonder Buck's crying.

[Trapper]

We were standing on them logs and Jeff and I couldn't pick it up out of there. Huckleberry was standing right here. He looked right at Jeff. He said, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

That scared me. It actually did. I thought someone was yelling in my house.

[Christina]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Wow. Mountain monsters got a rise out of me. Will Huckleberry be dead? Will we find the remains of the Cherokee devil? I don't know.

[Christina]

We don't know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We'll wait until after we take a break. Remember, remember, we're doing some good this TCB holiday by donating to good charitable causes. And there's a couple of them in the show notes for you. Today we're folking. Today we're focusing. We're focusing on the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Christina will put a link in the show notes. Please donate just a couple of bucks. This time of year is so important for all these charities. That's when they make their money and they do their best work. So if you would go donate a few bucks to a family in need, we'll take a break.

[Christina]

Sounds good.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We'll be back.

[Nasser]

What do you mean you don't know our phone number? I only tell it to you twice a day, four times a week. Fine. If you insist, I will tell it to you again. It's 212-4333 TCB. That's 212-433-3822 and don't you forget it. Now, in case you can't remember, our instagram handle is hecommercial break break. A tough one. I know. And our TikTok handle is CB podcast and that one is the same as our website tcbpodcast.com and one last thing, go to YouTube.com thecommercialbreak for all of our video episodes. Got it?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Good.

[Huckleberry]

When it comes to hiring, don't search for great talent. Match with them. Thanks to Indeed. Indeed is your matching and hiring platform with over 350 million global monthly visitors, according to Indeed data, and a matching engine that helps you find qualified candidates fast. And Indeed doesn't just help you hire faster. 93% of employers agree Indeed delivers the highest quality matches compared to other job sites, according to a recent Indeed survey, leveraging over 140 million qualifications and preferences every day. Indeed's matching engine is constantly learning from your preferences, so the more you use Indeed the better it gets. Join more than 3.5 million businesses worldwide that use Indeed to hire great talent fast. Just go to indeed.com listen right now and listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit. To get your jobs more visibility, go to indeed.com listen and tell them you heard about them from this podcast. Terms and conditions apply.

[Christina]

Holiday magic is in the air and DSW's got all the shoes to make your season extra merry. Believe you've got parties to attend and lists to check twice. So DSW is taking care of the details like gifts to make their eyes all aglow. Styles that bring joy to your world. Brands everyone wants like Ugg, Nike, Birkenstock and more and deals to make your budget bright.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Find the perfect shoes for you and.

[Christina]

Yours at a DSW Store near you or dsw.com.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay. And we're back with Huck Chuck Fucking suck here on the mountain monsters. They're chasing the Cherokee devil, Chrissy, and we've just. They're looking for Huckleberry.

[Christina]

Yeah, they found a totem pole.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

They were with the big totem pole. The 8 inch. The 14 inch in diameter, 8 foot tall totem pole has now gotten up and walked itself away.

[Christina]

It's gone.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's gone with Huckleberry. Huckleberry is also gone. What I noticed about mountain monsters, now that we've watched so many of these episodes, I'm getting into more of the nuance of the mountain monsters is the. A lot of the episode is dedicated to them standing around in the woods talking about what did happen when the cameras were not around. Exactly so. Uncle Bear. That's right. It's all Billy's fault. God damn it. There's only one of me. What do you want me to do? I'm busy shaking the camera for you. But what I. This is an interesting thing that I just put together is that a lot of times the most intense action is only described. It's not seen.

[Christina]

Oh, that's the formula.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

That is the formula.

[Trapper]

Huckleberry. Huckleberry. Get him, guys. Get him.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Willy, quick, shoot in that general direction.

[Christina]

They look to be running pretty quickly.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, they do. Hey, good for these guys.

[Christina]

Oh, is that supposed to be a monster? No, that was a bush.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

No, that's just. That's just me shaking the camera a lot. Huckleberry.

[Trapper]

Huckleberry.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hey.

[Trapper]

We were standing right there where that totem pole was, and all we. Huckleberry let out this blood curdling stream right up the hill. Huck.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hey, Huck. Oh, you had your head. Huck. Ho. Easy.

[Trapper]

Listen.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Catch me outside. Listen, listen.

[Trapper]

If you've ever been out in the hills of these Appalachians and you hear somebody scream, with all these deep valleys, tall ridges, you have no idea where it's coming from.

[Buck]

Trapper, can you see any sign?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

If you know how sound works, then you understand generally when you hear something coming from a direction, that sound is coming from that direction.

[Buck]

It didn't sound like he was that far up ahead.

[Trapper]

He squawked right.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, nothing there.

[Buck]

Something wrong or something either got a hold of him or he just plumb out of his head and he's lost.

[Christina]

He's plumb out of his head.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Either something's got a hold of him or the meth has gotten a little bit too much for him. But either way, we should find him before he takes his overalls off.

[Buck]

This is bad. Oh, my gosh.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Is he naked against the tree?

[Christina]

They always put Huckleberry in those situations. Remember the time he went to, like, the frozen lake?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes. And he was, like, wearing a loincloth on the frozen lake. I mean, to be fair to the group, Huckleberry probably is the best physique of the group. Like, if you're gonna get naked, let it be Huckleberry.

[Buck]

This Huckleberry.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's easy. He's easy. Easy. Don't help him quite yet. Let him suffer an additional couple of minutes before we go actually touch him.

[Trapper]

Huckleberry, please come over the top of that hill. What a sight to see. Huckleberry standing up here.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Huckleberry. No way.

[Nasser]

It's blurred out. He's, like, covered in mud. And then they still blurred it all out.

[Christina]

It's horrible. Oh, listen, Huckleberry.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Huckleberry's hung. He's hung like a huckleberry. He's got his own twigs and berries. I'm telling you what? Huckleberry is covered in mud. He looks like a huckleberry. Now he's officially Huckleberry. It looks like a bush running through the. At what cost does this show dignify or indignify people?

[Trapper]

Buck ass naked covered in mud. Move that damn toe to God.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

This is the best thing on Mountain Monsters ever. Is that Huckleberry? He is naked as a baby.

[Christina]

Naked with mud.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's a jaybird.

[Nasser]

I said it last time. I'll say it again. He looks like Mr. Tumnus.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He does look like.

[Christina]

Is he holding the totem pole?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's holding the totem pole. He's got two poles he's carrying around, if the blur is any indication. Wow, look at that. And that does not look anything like mud. I'm sorry. That is straight, like crude oil or something. That's paint.

[Huckleberry]

Hell.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's gold, dude. Look at that.

[Christina]

Was he humping the totem pole?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He was having. He was having a moment. Hey, toot him.

[Trapper]

Get him.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, they're tackling him. Oh, no.

[Christina]

Get him. Did they say get him?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. It's a kerfuffle. Get him. Get him before he orgasms. No one wants to see that. Quick, get it. Rap is half hard in a cold cloth. They jumped into the water. Oh, my God. Oh, this has gotten way crazier than I ever expected. Wow. So now we've got Huckleberry fucking A. Totem pole has been tackled by the rest of the team, doused in cold water to stop him from Jizzing on said totem pole. This is just amazing work. On behalf of the mountain. Mountain. Who storyboarded this one out, I want to know. Travel Channel. You need a raise? Get it. Get it, Daddy. Well, in the good news department, it's probably the first bath from Huckleberry.

[Christina]

In a little while.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

In a little while. Huckleberry.

[Buck]

Huckleberry wasn't in his right mind. We didn't know what to do. So Bill. Jeff tackled it just to try to get control of him so he wouldn't take off again.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Dan, are you okay? What in the world? These guys are like. They're cutely affectionate toward each other. Do you know what I mean? They are one of the. So now Huckleberry, I guess, has come to his senses since he's been doused in cold water. He is naked as a jaybird. I mean, the guy is just naked. And now they're petting his head, like, you know, standing above him.

[Christina]

Like the hair.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Christina]

Forehead.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Like, you know, which indicates one of two things. Either they're being kind and gentle, or someone's waiting for a blow job. You know what I'm saying? It's just. It's got that look to it.

[Buck]

Hey, buddy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Here, Huck.

[Buck]

Huck, you all right?

[Trapper]

Are you Huckleberry now?

[Christina]

Are you Huckleberry now?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm a win Huckleberry. Hell, yeah, I'm hell, yeah. All's well that ends well. He was a totem pole with the Cherokee monster. But now that he's taking a bath, everything's great.

[Christina]

Oh, wow.

[Buck]

The cold water must have done the trick because he's back. What's the last thing you remember?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Coming out of my mother's womb, walking and running.

[Buck]

All I remember is.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What's that? Walking and running. Shucking.

[Christina]

And that's all Huckleberry's head of security.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, security. Doing a fine job, Huckleberry. Keeping everybody away from the totem poles.

[Buck]

Coming to in the water, Jeff on top of me. Bill's there. Next thing I know, I look up, the whole team's there. I have.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's a foursome I'll never forget.

[Buck]

Idea what I've been doing. Did you see it hut Buck? I don't think I did. I can't tell you for apologies. It was like I was up here and my body was down here, and I was watching everything I was doing.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And I was making sweet love to that totem pole. It was the most beautiful thing in the world. I saw God in my own eyes as I was caressing that totem pole. Gently, lovingly.

[Buck]

Sounds weird, but that's the only way I can explain it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Wow. I want to fuck a totem pole. Wow.

[Buck]

Trying to give you guys all the answers I can. We understand, brother. I hope it comes back. I'd love to know what the hell happened. I'd love to be able to tell you.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, luckily, we got none of it on, right? Luckily we got none of it on tape. You'll be fine.

[Buck]

I'm telling you, I've never felt like this. This is scary. I know Buck feels this way. You have no control.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I've never made love to a totem pole before. It's a certain kind of feeling. Listen, I gotta. I gotta ask this just obvious question, too. Every episode, it's a fresh start. It's. They come back, everything's great. They're reinvigorated. They're gonna. New monster, new location. Yes. If you're really going through all this psychological torture, would it stand to reason that maybe you would take a couple of weeks off, A year off, two years off? You just got caught naked run. Dragging a totem pole around the Appalachian mountains. Don't you think that requires some vacation time?

[Christina]

Yeah, it does.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Trapper]

What you do.

[Buck]

You think you do, and you think you're fighting. This thing's strong. We didn't even get to go after that stupid Cherokee devil.

[Trapper]

Tell you what we're going to do. We're going home.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You've taken all our time running, fooling around with that totem pole.

[Trapper]

We're gonna heal up mentally and physically.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, there we go. Hey, listen, I am doing good this week.

[Trapper]

I'm tuned in, God damn it. Then we're gonna arm up. We're coming back.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, let's do it. Let's come back and give him some. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's take a break so I can get to the bar. Yeah. That little guy. He seems like a little child. He's so excited.

[Trapper]

Guys, this team's on a mission to prove the existence a Bigfoot and Appalachian.

[Buck]

We'll come back.

[Christina]

I thought it was the Cherokee devil.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, it is the Cherokee devil. It's a version of Bigfoot that you gotta understand is that there's not just one type of bigfoot. There are multiple types of bigfoot. And the mountain monsters are tuned into all of them. They know. They put their ear to the hala.

[Christina]

That's a fact.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, that put my ear to the holla. And then I. They figure it out. And it's a fact. And these guys are determined one way or the other to Find that Bigfoot. They're gonna be the. Imagine if they spent this much time, energy, effort, and money actually trying to find Bigfoot, maybe they would find Bigfoot.

[Christina]

I think so.

[Trapper]

And this Ukaloo, he's the most bizarre and dangerous Bigfoot we've ever chased. We're going home. We're gonna lick our wounds, we're gonna get our head straight, and we're coming back. Huck, I think you and Buck need to sort your thoughts.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I just can't get over Huckleberry. He's sitting there naked.

[Christina]

I know. And he's laying like. He's kind of laying to the side.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's just kind of like a. A puddle of old man just laying there. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Listen, I don't look any better naked, but I'm just saying he's just kind of a puddle of an old man. Am I right?

[Christina]

I mean, yes.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's sunk to the floor. He's sunken to the floor, and he's.

[Nasser]

Kind of leaning over. He's giving very much like rose, like from the Titanic. You know, you can't get on this door.

[Christina]

You know, he's got somebody's big jacket over.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Nasser]

He looks sad, though.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He really does.

[Christina]

He looks. Whoa.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

But again, I want to remind everybody, I think it's best we're seeing Huckleberry naked and not any of the other guys. I think this is the best of a bad choice. You know what I'm saying?

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Buck]

After what happened with Buck and me.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Jeff and Trappers, Buck and I, we'll.

[Buck]

Have to start doing a bunch more research. We're going to have to dig into this Cherokee Moose Smith.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And why are they blurring out his chest? He must have a tattoo there that they don't like.

[Buck]

Yeah, they can find out to fight this Cherokee devil.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I guess the Nazi tattoos don't go over too well on Travel Channel, huh.

[Buck]

To give us half a chance.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

All right, there's it there. There it is. The second part of that. I think there might be a. A middle part there that we missed.

[Christina]

With the vanilla because we didn't see the vanilla envelope.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We did not see the manila envelopes. But anyway, the mountain months monsters did not fail to catch the Cherokee monster. But Huckleberry got a bath, so I guess that's good. Speaking of aliens and monsters, have you been keeping up with the New Jersey drone situation?

[Christina]

Yes.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

The east coast drone situation. That is going absolutely bananas. People are demanding answers, and I have one for you. They're New Jersey drones. That's what they are, they're drones from New Jersey.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Nasser]

What happened? I don't know about this.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hundreds of people, maybe thousands of reported sightings of drones. Many people calling them UFOs, likely not over New Jersey. Some people think they are Iranian actual like military drones and some of them are rather large.

[Christina]

Well, I was going to say somebody was saying something about car size.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes, they can be car size. Drones come in all different sizes. Matter of fact, the US military flies drones that are the size of fighter planes. They're literally planes, autonomous planes, but the kind that you can get commercially available usually don't have battery life more than an hour or two. Some people reported seeing them for up to four or five hours up there in similar places, moving in ways that you know, they're not supposed to move. But the US government has assured us, and of course the US government is assuring everybody that what we're saying, yeah, it's safe, don't worry about it. People are freaking the fuck out. They think that aliens have now just, they're out there dancing with other drones and airplanes. They're making their move essentially. I tend not to believe that. I would love to think that we're finally having contact because that would be really fucking cool. And, or maybe not, I don't know. But all the videos that I've seen, I feel like those could be explained away as either commercially available drones that have something has been put on them like some kind, you know, you people make like Star Trek drones, Star wars drones. They make drones in all different shapes and sizes. So are these people that are just fucking around likely? Right. Also, is it possible that there are military or for law enforcement drones that are out there also tracking people and the government just doesn't want to say for whatever reason? Yes. Is it likely that they're actual UFOs? No, it's not likely. I'd love to believe it, you know, we would, but I'm just not convinced. I haven't seen any convincing video. Lots of people putting together super shitty fake videos, you know, trying to claim. And there are hundreds of thousands of people collectively on social media, media that are desperately buying into this. They think this is it, here it comes, here's our time. You know, this is, this, this hysteria has been going on since the 1930s and it's not going to go away anytime soon. Do I believe that there are aliens? Absolutely. Do I think they've been here? Maybe. Maybe we're aliens. Maybe we dropped from a meteorite in the sky or our DNA did somehow some Way, shape or form. But until someone actually shows me some proof and there are convincing videos out there, like that military video. But until someone shows me convincing proof. Roof. I think this is likely some dickhead in his mom's garage building. Interesting. Drones and flying them around New Jersey and other dickheads in their mom's garage flying other drones. Because now they want to get on in the action and see their drones on social media. Do you know what I'm saying? That's my opinion. But stay tuned. We never know. I mean, what do you think?

[Christina]

I mean, I. I think exactly what you said. I think it's just a bunch of people that are fucking with people.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And if there are really thousands of sightings of these, someone is going to catch a video. If it isn't anything alien or a ufo, an actual ufo, someone's gonna catch a video that is good quality enough that we will be able to see and it will be convincing. If they don't, then it's just dickheads in their mom's garages. That's.

[Christina]

Yeah. I mean, how would we even know really the difference if there was a real one or a fake one or who. What? I mean, you have to make contact, I think to know if there are.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Aliens and they got here, they're either been here for a long time, like octopuses, right. Are aliens, or they are so fucking advanced that if they don't want to be seen, they're not going to be seen. If they want to be seen, they'll be seen. And also if there are UFOs and it's advanced technology, they will fly in ways we have never seen things fly before. And there are again, there are videos out there that are pretty fucking convincing that the military has taken you remember a couple years ago that was released? That one still gets my go. That one still makes me think, wow, maybe they did catch that on video. But so far the New Jersey drones look like New Jersey drones.

[Christina]

Yeah, they do.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, it looks like New Jersey drones. So stop fucking around, people. It's not Elon Musk. It's not the aliens. It's just New Jersey drones. I think my opinion. But you know what, stay tuned tomorrow we'll be back for more. 12 days of tcb. 13 days of t. 20 days of tcb. You count. You figure it out. However many episodes. I was talking to someone at the network today and I was like, he was like. It actually ends up being 20 straight days. 20 straight days of TCB. That's amazing. We did it.

[Christina]

We're doing it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. We're doing it. Which means we only have officially taken off four days. The entire December. Isn't that crazy?

[Christina]

That is pretty crazy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yes. But our traffic hasn't gone up one bit, so I don't know. What? No, I'm kidding. Oh, man. All right, well, we wrapped up that mountain monsters nice and neatly.

[Christina]

Yeah, and a bow for Christmas.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We've still got lots of dating content to come. Mtv, old MTV dating shows, the Love Connection, and a very special Christmas Eve and Christmas Day for you. You know, we can only end the year with one kind of bow. And man, are we gonna wrap it up for you. So stay tuned to the 12 days of TCB. In the meantime, like so many of you have, please text us, let us know how it's going. 212-4333 TCB. 212-433-3822. You can also follow us on Instagram at the commercial break TCB podcast on Tik Tok. Or you can go to the website tcbpodcast.com there's more information about the show. All the audio, all the video right there from one location. If you'd like your Free TCB bumper sticker, one that will probably like last at least 30 days, go to the website, hit the contact us button. The drop down menu says I want my free sticker. You can give us your physical address and away it will go. Guess what? All episodes of the commercial break now available on video. We spent all this money to make the studio look nice. Why don't you go watch us look nice on YouTube.com the commercial break. Or you can check out the full episodes on Spotify about three days after they air. And I wish I could put them up the very same day, but doesn't work.

[Christina]

Yeah, I've been watching those.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Feel good on you on Spotify, huh? Good job.

[Christina]

Yep.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, we just had to find a way to make money off that. Then we'll be great. There's a lot of people actually watching them on Spotify. So please tune into Spotify a couple days after they air here and you can watch it. Donate all the fantastic causes we've been talking about. The Nasser Nassau National Breast cancer coalition fund, St. Jude ASPCA and the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for right now.

[Christina]

I think so.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'll tell you that I love you. I love you best you best you out there in the podcast universe. Until tomorrow, Chrissy and I will say, we do say and we must say goodbye.

[Unknown]

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[Christina]

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[Unknown]

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[Chrissy Hoadley]

Sharing with family meals, couches, stories, Grandma's secret pecan pie recipe, and now you can also share a cart. With Instacart's family carts, everyone can add what they want to one group cart from wherever they are. So you don't have to go from room to room to find out who wants cranberry sauce or who should get mini marshmallows for the yams or collecting votes for sugar cookies versus shortbread. Just share a cart and then share the meals and the moments. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus enjoy free delivery on your first three orders. Service fees and terms apply. That's my opinion. Have no family to celebrate Christmas with this year. The commercial break is live the entire holiday season season to make you even more miserable than you currently are.

[Brian Green]

So put your Christmas pajamas on, gather.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Around the Christmas tree and listen to brand new episodes of the Commercial Break.