The Commercial Break – “Check Yer Thermals”
April 5, 2024
Hosts: Bryan Green and Krissy Hoadley
Episode Overview
In this lively episode of The Commercial Break, Bryan and Krissy bring their trademark chaotic banter to topics ranging from the unglamorous joys of “middle-of-the-road” podcasting to a hilarious review/recap of the TV show Mountain Monsters, specifically spotlighting the bumbling hunt for the legendary “Sheep Squatch.” With self-deprecating humor and sharp commentary, the hosts riff on pop culture, imposter syndrome, and the accidental comedy gold found in cryptid-hunting cable shows.
Main Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Art of Being “Just Fine” – Embracing Mediocrity
- Cheesecake Factory as an Analogy
- Bryan reads about the Cheesecake Factory being the highest-grossing chain.
- Krissy and Bryan embrace being “fine” rather than “great” — likening themselves to the Cheesecake Factory of podcasts.
- “Somebody’s got to be middle.” – Krissy (01:51)
- Bryan argues there’s wisdom (and less drama) in staying “middle of the pack” rather than shooting for celebrity status.
- They joke about fleeting fame and not wanting Conan-level attention or controversy.
- “I don’t want to be at Smartless level or Conan level.” – Bryan (02:18)
2. Podcast Beginnings and Listener Perspective
- Bryan shares his initial excitement over early download numbers, thanks in part to a LinkedIn post by his mother-in-law that went viral in Venezuela. (09:09)
- Advice from friend Allison Hare:
- “Just imagine you have 350 people in a bar and you’re talking directly to them … that would seem like a lot of people.” (09:56)
- Krissy and Bryan reflect on why “imposter syndrome” is a permanent companion for podcasters:
- “It is difficult for me to put myself into a mindset where I believe that 350 people should be listening to me do anything, let alone try and be funny.” – Bryan (10:53)
3. Aspirations, Imposter Syndrome & Conan O’Brien
- Bryan dreams of being friends with Conan O’Brien, relating to his publicly self-deprecating persona and possible imposter syndrome. (06:41)
- “In my head when I’m listening to his show, we’re best friends.” – Bryan (07:11)
- Discusses the realities of podcast guest bookings — most big-name guests go on Conan or Smartless first, while TCB often gets the “what am I doing here?” vibe from some guests. (11:04)
4. Cold Plunges, Cryotherapy, and Athletic Trends
- After a tangent about their first podcast guest, Veer Das, Krissy and Bryan riff on the trend of cold therapy, cryo chambers, and who really benefits from them.
- Bryan dismisses cold therapy for “regular exercisers,” recognizing possible value only for high-performance athletes.
- “The most exercise I get is rocking my daughter to sleep at night.” – Bryan (14:38)
- Light jabs at the faux-scientific claims behind “toughing it out” in ice baths for the average person.
5. Middle Age Realizations & Lost Alternative Careers
- Bryan muses about his nighttime ritual of watching Mr. D and fantasizing about becoming a teacher or space engineer, then quickly resigns himself:
- “Those days are gone. I’m not going to be a teacher. No one’s giving me a teaching degree, especially not after [they listen to this podcast].” – Bryan (17:07)
- “Fork in the road” moments: Bryan chose podcasting over all other (potentially lucrative) paths. (17:58)
- Jokes about the lack of financial payoff in podcasting, poking fun at the modest returns for their “fame.” (18:04)
Memorable Quotes & Moments
Self-Awareness About Fame and Podcasting
- “I don’t want anybody to know me, quite frankly.” – Krissy (02:36)
- “We are nowhere close to Conan O’Brien’s level … But I do sense my name carries some weight in this industry. And it’s usually… it’s a magnet — you know, the magnet has two sides? We’re on the side where it pushes people away.” – Bryan (05:44)
On Guest Bookings
- “There is no good reason for a guest to come on The Commercial Break. None. Zero. Just ask Neil Brennan. He’ll tell you.” – Bryan (06:27)
Embracing Mediocrity
- “If you stick in the middle of the pack, life is grand.” – Bryan (01:54)
- “Somebody’s got to be mediocre.” – Krissy (01:51)
Imposter Syndrome
- “Yeah, very much. Yeah. Very much so. I feel like imposter syndrome, it is a thing, and I have it. I don’t know that I’ll ever get rid of it.” – Bryan (06:41)
The ‘Mountain Monsters’ Recap
(24:11-54:14)
The episode’s comedic high comes from Bryan and Krissy’s extended play-by-play of the Mountain Monsters TV show, specifically the “Sheep Squatch” hunt. They mock the low-budget tactics, overdramatic dialogue, and the lovable incompetence of the show’s cast:
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On “Sheep Squatch":
- “It’s a combo of the Sasquatch and a sheep.” – Bryan (24:21)
- “He’s got the body of a Sasquatch and a weird piranha mouth and goat horns.” – Krissy (26:00)
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Making Fun of Cheap TV Production:
- The cast is always in “Boone County.”
- “I’m so proud of our country. I read a lot of the comments … and people take it just as we do. It’s just comedy gold.” – Bryan (26:24)
- They point out that no real photographic evidence is ever shown, despite an abundance of cameras and alleged close encounters.
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Favorite Play-by-Play Moments:
- “They’re swinging their guns all over the place at each other … at a groundbreaking 1.2 miles per hour.” – Bryan (27:17)
- “Cryptids … that’s what they’re called — these wild animals that don’t really exist, but people want to believe they do … when you go cryptid hunting, you split up. It gives the creature a better chance to eat you alive.” – Bryan (32:00)
- “Can they see him? Because I can’t. They’re flashing up the thermal camera, which shows nothing. I don’t know what I’m looking at … just shows the woods.” – Bryan (40:29)
- “Buck’s pants are all the way down around his thigh; his whole ass is sticking out as he's trying to shuffle down a hill.” – Bryan (43:19)
- “I think I saw some dangling participle there, didn’t you?” – Bryan (51:54)
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On the Show’s Ongoing Lack of Evidence:
- “I understand this has been going on for whatever, 12 seasons. And you’ve never once, that I know of, photographed or had any evidence that any of these things exist. … Just keep filming, just keep yelling.” – Bryan (49:47)
Notable Segment Timestamps
- 01:00 | The “just fine” Cheesecake Factory analogy
- 06:41 | Bryan discusses imposter syndrome and his Conan O’Brien fantasy
- 09:09 | Bryan recounts early viral download numbers (thanks to LinkedIn and Venezuela)
- 14:15 | Riff on cold plunges/cryotherapy and who they are really for
- 17:07 | Bryan’s career and life “fork in the road” realizations
- 24:11 | Transition to the “Mountain Monsters” Sheep Squatch hunt mock-along
- 26:00 | Describing the bizarre “Sheep Squatch” composite beast
- 27:17 | Mocking the cast’s slow chase and camera crew antics
- 32:00 | The wisdom (?) of splitting up in cryptid-hunting
- 40:29 | Making fun of useless thermal camera footage
- 43:19 | “Buck’s” wardrobe malfunction and ensuing hilarity
- 49:47 | Lack of real evidence after a decade of Mountain Monsters
- 51:54 | The real “monster”: exposed boxers
Episode Tone
- Playful, self-aware, and irreverent: The hosts take nothing — including themselves or podcasting — too seriously.
- Rich in inside jokes and chemistry: Decades of friendship evident in rapid-fire banter and quick-witted asides.
- Comedic deconstruction: Especially when riffing on Mountain Monsters, the lines between commentary, improv, and mock-audio play blur to hilarious effect.
Recap for Non-Listeners
This episode is a quintessential Commercial Break experience: deliciously meandering, ping-ponging from cultural references and podcasting realities to their signature comedic MST3K-style takedown of the Mountain Monsters TV show. If you have ever wondered what it’s like inside the headspace of self-deprecating, “middle of the road” podcasters surviving on a mix of chaos, community, and infectious laughter — or just want to hear grown adults marvel at “Sheep Squatch” — this is your invitation.