For Your Consideration: Nextdoor & Ask TCB

Summary

Episode Summary: "For Your Consideration: Nextdoor & Ask TCB"
Release Date: March 20, 2025
Podcast: The Commercial Break
Hosts: Bryan Green and Krissy (Chrissy) Oley

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1. Introduction & Initial Banter (00:00 – 02:59)

The episode kicks off with light-hearted banter between Bryan Green and Krissy Oley. They discuss Bryan's experience selling his car to Carvana, highlighting the convenience and hassle-free process.

Bryan Green [00:15]:
"Carvana gave me an offer in minutes. Picked it up and paid me on the spot. It was so convenient."

Krissy humorously contrasts this with an exaggerated, fake advertisement for "Shumba Casino," setting the comedic tone for the episode.

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2. News Segment: Department of Gross Incompetence (01:02 – 02:59)

Karen Doubletree delivers a satirical news update about Xanadu Susk, the newly unelected head of Doji's Department of Gross Incompetence, who controversially disrupted traffic management in Crabapple. The segment humorously portrays Susk's misguided priorities and his outlandish statements on social media.

Xanadu Susk [01:50]:
"All you females, all you women, if you are coming to my page, go yourself because I'm not leaving my video games for no..."

This segment lampoons local government inefficiency and social media outbursts, blending mock-serious news with comedic elements.

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3. Main Discussion Topics

a) March Madness & Sports Nostalgia (04:02 – 11:17)

Bryan and Krissy dive into their annual experience with March Madness, sharing personal anecdotes about filling out brackets and reminiscing about memorable sports moments. They express frustration over unpredictable "Cinderella" teams that disrupt their bracket predictions.

Bryan Green [04:10]:
"Every year, Wild cards come on a run and they mess up my bracket all up. I'm a lug nut and I know nothing about sports."

The conversation shifts to broader sports nostalgia, including Bryan's memories of watching Tiger Woods' career highlights and subsequent decline due to injuries and personal scandals. They draw parallels between Woods and other iconic figures like Michael Jackson and Tom Cruise, emphasizing his once-dominant presence in golf.

Bryan Green [07:00]:
"Tiger Woods really was one of sports' most interesting figures. Every time he teed it up, he was in contention or winning."

b) Academy Awards & Movie Marketing (11:37 – 16:00)

The hosts critique the manipulative marketing strategies employed by movie studios to secure Academy Award nominations and wins. Using the film "Anora" as a case study, Bryan highlights the exorbitant costs associated with courting Academy members, arguing that financial influence undermines the integrity of the awards.

Bryan Green [13:35]:
"Anora was made on a small budget but spent almost $20 million marketing to the Academy. It's all bought and paid for."

Krissy adds to the discussion, emphasizing the futility of appreciating films when the selection process is flawed by excessive financial incentives.

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4. Nextdoor Posts Segment (32:23 – 47:00)

Bryan and Krissy engage with humorous and bizarre posts from the Nextdoor app, offering witty commentary and exaggerated responses. This segment showcases their chemistry and improvisational skills as they navigate through quirky neighborly concerns.

Bryan Green [32:57]:
"Could everyone please be quiet for a couple of days? I'm trying to catch up on sleep, and it's very loud."

Krissy Oley [33:42]:
"You can't train a cat."

The hosts laugh over absurd scenarios, such as a rogue Roomba wreaking havoc and a neighbor practicing archery by accidentally shooting arrows into yards, blending real neighborhood issues with comedic flair.

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5. Ask TCB: Relationship Advice (49:09 – 59:25)

Listeners submit relationship dilemmas, and Bryan and Krissy offer their unfiltered, often brutally honest advice. The questions range from unconventional partner behaviors to familial acceptance issues.

Listener Tammy [53:27]:
"My partner never apologizes, even when clearly wrong. Is this a red flag or am I being sensitive?"

Bryan Green [53:28]:
"She's gaslighting too. Get a divorce."

Another listener questions how to handle a girlfriend's family treating him like an outsider:

Bryan Green [60:17]:
"You gotta find a new girlfriend."

The hosts maintain a humorous yet straightforward approach, emphasizing boundary-setting and self-respect in relationships.

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6. Conclusion & Final Thoughts (65:01 – 67:34)

As the episode winds down, Bryan reflects on the challenges of maintaining relationships amidst external pressures and personal differences. He shares a personal story about his ex-wife's family, highlighting the long-term impact of familial acceptance on marital stability.

Bryan Green [61:24]:
"I felt very uncomfortable around that side of the family. It never sat well with me."

The episode concludes with Bryan and Krissy reaffirming their camaraderie and teasing upcoming segments, leaving listeners anticipating future discussions and comedic insights.

Bryan Green [67:33]:
"Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say goodbye."

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Notable Quotes

• Bryan Green [04:10]:
  "Every year, Wild cards come on a run and they mess up my bracket all up. I'm a lug nut and I know nothing about sports."

• Xanadu Susk [01:50]:
  "All you females, all you women, if you are coming to my page, go yourself because I'm not leaving my video games for no..."

• Bryan Green [13:35]:
  "Anora was made on a small budget but spent almost $20 million marketing to the Academy. It's all bought and paid for."

• Bryan Green [53:28]:
  "She's gaslighting too. Get a divorce."

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This episode of The Commercial Break masterfully blends comedy with sharp social commentary, addressing topics from sports and movie industries to everyday neighborly antics and personal relationships. Bryan Green and Krissy Oley’s dynamic interaction ensures a lively and entertaining listen, even for those tuning in for the first time.

Transcript

[Brian Green]

Yeah, sure thing.

[Chris Oley]

Hey, you sold that car yet?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, sold it to Carvana.

[Chris Oley]

Oh, I thought you were selling to that guy.

[Brian Green]

The guy who wanted to pay me in foreign currency. No interest over 36 months. Yeah, no.

[Karen Doubletree]

Carvana gave me an offer in minutes.

[Brian Green]

Picked it up and paid me on the spot. It was so convenient. Just like that? Yeah.

[Chris Oley]

No hassle?

[Brian Green]

None.

[Chris Oley]

That is super convenient.

[Reaper]

Sell your car to Carvana and swap. Hassle for convenience.

[Brian Green]

Pickup fees may apply.

[Chris Oley]

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[Rachel]

And welcome back to WSHIT's Evening News. It's news you can use before use news. I'm Karen Doubletree with today's headlines. Controversy today in Crabapple as the newly unelected head of Doji, the Department of gross Incompetence, sent officials to the Department of Transportation to cut the power to all the traffic signals and remove all stop signs from the Crabapple main street. Director Xanadu Susk told WSHIT in a statement. These moves were made in an effort to cripple the town's traffic and make parking lots more accessible for his helicopter. One of the officials charged with the responsibility of turning off all the traffic lights and removing the stop signs. Calling himself Reaper, the sleeper was targeted with negative feedback and comments on his Instagram page. In a press conference earlier this afternoon, he had this to.

[Xanadu Susk]

Good morning everybody. Hello, this is Reaper and I am back with another announcement. All right, all you, all you females, all you women, if you are coming to my page, go yourself because I am not leaving my video games for no, I'm sorry. Video games are my priority. Women are nothing but total disgrace to this society. I'm sorry, but you girls are not of interest to me. I don't know how many times I can say that without actually going blue in the face, but I'm being factual. So please find another man to bother.

[Brian Green]

Please.

[Xanadu Susk]

Go fuck yourself. Vegan for life.

[Rachel]

Beeper then went on to add that while he understands the anger around the decisions being made, part of his compensation package includes being in a room with a real live Female and the ability to access an AI sex robot whenever he wanted. But he assured Crab Appliance that all of the stop signs are safely tucked away in his mom's basement. And now, with the check of traffic, everything's a mess and the whole town's falling apart. We'll be back after this commercial break.

[Brian Green]

On this episode of the commercial break and the special effects don't look like special effects. They don't give it away. The guy rides a big giant worm and you don't know, you're like, oh, where did they get a big giant worm from? Because it's so realistic.

[Reaper]

Never ending story.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Atreyu.

[Reaper]

Atreyu.

[Brian Green]

Arturo. Is it there? Italian. He's from the planet of Attilion. Arturo. So funny. I'll try you. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this show, Chris and Joy Oley. Best to you, Chris.

[Reaper]

Best to you, Brian.

[Brian Green]

To you out there on the podcast universe, how the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. We are smack dab in the middle or at the beginning of March Madness. Chrissy.

[Reaper]

Yes, we are.

[Brian Green]

Yes, we are.

[Reaper]

I filled out a bracket. Jeff and I just do it for fun.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. You know, and, and have you ever won a bracket?

[Reaper]

No.

[Brian Green]

No. Either have I. I came really close in like 1999 and I got very excited. And then sometime in the last couple of years, I stopped filling out the brackets because I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. No fucking clue.

[Reaper]

I tried to actually ask AI all jumbled all up. It couldn't figure it out either.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, well, you know. Yeah, it's like. Because the thing is, is that every year, Wild every year there are these Cinderella teams that just go on a run and they fuck your bracket all up. And I don't like that. Like, I'm with the best. Like I'm the guy who goes, oh, number one versus number three. Number one. Oh, number 10 versus number four. Number four. I'm that guy every year because I'm a fucking lug nut and I know nothing about sports. And I think to myself, I'm being smart about this. And then I like randomly choose one. It'll be like number 13 against number 12. And I'll be like, number 13.

[Reaper]

Because you like that stance.

[Brian Green]

Yes, I like that one. I like those guys. I like that. And inevitably I'm done after the first round. I mean, I think a couple of Years ago. I like, did okay until they got to like the sweet 16. And then I just got blown. I had one team, I had X'd out in the first round. They ended up winning the whole thing. And I forgot who it was. But whatever. I do enjoy watching.

[Reaper]

I remember our first. I think it was our first year working together at Cleartown Altar radio station. We, we. I mean, everybody was just out at the bar.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Reaper]

Watching like the Thursday.

[Brian Green]

Yes, yes. Because you know radio. That's why. Because radio. Yeah.

[Reaper]

We actually didn't need March Madness to. For an excuse at the bar in the middle of the day.

[Brian Green]

No. I will never forget US Open Tiger Woods Monday. A Monday. Extra. Extra rounds because they were tied. Right. So they, you know, you go into Playo and it was. I forget the guy's name, the Japanese guy, he was so good. And Tiger woods with a broken leg and they had to play 18 holes. And from the. It started at like 8:30 in the morning. And they put that on in the con in one of the conference rooms and no one got a thing done the entire day. It was six hours of watching Tiger Woods. Someone went and got some beer and it was just like. I don't know, it was like playing hooky. Meanwhile, you know, the. There's no ads running in the radio shows.

[Reaper]

That's like.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. There's just tornado warnings just running back to. Back to back on these major radio stations here in Atlanta. We're all watching Tiger Woods. The entire world was watching Tiger Woods. Any excuse, Any excuse.

[Reaper]

Just the Achilles heel.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, he's done. He's done.

[Reaper]

Did you see that? He's dating Don Jr's ex wife.

[Brian Green]

Hey, listen, why not?

[Reaper]

Why not?

[Brian Green]

Why not? I mean, you know, it's all goes back to Trump, I guess, at the end of the day. I mean, Tiger's no fool. He's. He's one of those billionaires that's going to, you know, benefit from tax cuts. He's like, let me get in this family. Let me get in this family. Listen, I, Yeah, I have my thoughts about Tiger woods as a. As a human being. Neither here nor there is private life, is private life. But his private life became so public for so long that it was. It's hard to ignore some of the drama around Tiger. But he has just had accident and incident after accident and incident. He abused the shit out of his body with that golf swing and he's done. He's not going to play competitive golf at any kind of level ever again. I'm convinced of that. And that's sad to know because Tiger woods really was, oh, one of sports most interesting things. I mean, he. He just a different. It's like Michael Jackson, Tiger Woods, I don't know, you know, Tom Cruise, Michael Jordan. These people, they just defy gravity in a way that's really hard to understand. They capture the world's attention and they have the goods to back it up. And then every time. There was a time there when almost every time Tiger woods teed it up, he was in contention or winning. He win like 12 tournaments one season or something. I mean, just like unbelievable. He was so much fun to watch and you could count on him winning. So it was, it, you know, it was great.

[Reaper]

You and I would watch golf all the time with Mickelson.

[Brian Green]

Mickelson in woods at that Masters. And Mickelson hit that shot off the pine straw. That was great. It turns out he's a creep too. Wouldn't date me. It wouldn't surprise me if he's dating one of the Trumps also. I mean, he's just. Now he's in bed with the Saudi Arabians, whatever, you know, don't meet your heroes. That's all I gotta say. Don't meet your heroes. But the, the. The March Madness gets me every year. I love it. I love to watch. I'll start paying attention here over the weekend. But one of the things that I was paying attention to was this story about the University of West Virginia not getting into the tournament. You know, they have a selection committee that essentially selects all of the teams. And there are some. That's just obvious. They're going to be in the tournament. Duke. Right. They're going to be in the tournament. They're like the number one team or whatever. They're going to be in the tournament. No doubt. But then there's these on the bubble teams. They call them on the bubble teams. And the selection committee selects those teams. And this year they selected unc, the University of North Carolina, over the University of West Virginia, I think it is. And everyone was like, huh? Like UNC didn't have a better record than, you know, University of West Virginia. University of West Virginia certainly should have had more consideration than unc. And everybody was calling it a big scandal. And I was reading about it, and it does kind of feel like there's some weight to the conspiracy theories, I guess, as the athletic director for the unc, for the UNC sports division, you know, the athletics.

[Reaper]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Is on the selection committee. And he got paid some money, and he paid some money. Like there's this. It's all just follow the fucking money. Which is unbelievable to me. I mean, listen, it's not the fault of the kids at unc. They're just trying to play some basketball and they're excited about getting into the tournament. And they won their game last night on this, like the. They call it the first four, which is like a wild card. They won, I guess, silencing some of the critics. But it just goes to show that everything these days is bought and paid for. Every fucking thing. Capitalism is taking its final dying breaths. I think we're realizing that it only works for a few. It doesn't work for the many. And it's just like. It's so incredibly transparent what's going on here. And no one seems to give a shit. I guess no one stops it. No one cares. I don't know. Again, no knock on the kids from unc. They playing basketball and they're excited to be in the tournament, but so were the kids at the University of West Virginia. They deserve their shot too. And I don't know, there's gotta be a way that they can level the playing field or something. Having a selection committee with athletic directors on it doesn't sound like the most.

[Reaper]

Doesn't sound very fair and balanced, does it?

[Brian Green]

No, it doesn't. And you know, fair and balanced.

[Reaper]

It's the FOX News.

[Brian Green]

It's the Fox news of basketball selection committee. Yes, for sure. And this, this, like, kind of parlays into another point that I wanted to make about bought and paid for Anora, this movie that took the world by storm. And, you know, you saw it.

[Reaper]

I did.

[Brian Green]

You said, hey, listen, this wasn't life changing for you.

[Reaper]

It was a great movie. But yeah, no, it wasn't like, oh, my God, this is the best movie ever.

[Brian Green]

No, I have seen very few of those movies that like, changed my life, but I have seen them. I do know what you're talking about, right?

[Reaper]

You know, when, you know.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Pink Floyd, the Wall. High on acid. Changed my life in so many ways. I still can't watch that movie without seeing trails. I mean, it's like, weird. I tried to watch that a couple months ago. Yeah, it was on one of the streamers or Pluto TV or something. I tried to watch it and I was like, oh, my God, I feel like I'm tripping. I feel like my face is melting. Oh, no, wait, that's just the tanning bed. So I'm reading about Anora and let get this. Okay, so Anora wins all of these Academy Awards and the Academy Awards are voted on by the Academy. The Academy is made up of, I think, 12 or 1300 people. Actors. Yeah. Give me more money and you win. The Academy is this mysterious group of human beings. Actors, actresses, you know, producers, directors, technical people. I don't know how they pick the people. Yes, it's been the biz bullshit. Some in the biz bullshit. And they, I think, have up to a couple weeks ahead of the show to cast their votes. Well, listen, Anora was made like two years ago. It came out a year ago. It didn't change. An order is not changing from month number three to two weeks before the Oscars. You have to. It's got to be in the calendar year. So we have at least a month to watch this. This. This movie. Why do they wait until the very last minute to submit their votes? Well, here is why. And you may have seen this on a website like Variety or Hollywood Reporter. You may have seen. For your consideration.

[Reaper]

I've seen that there's a movie named for your. Consider a Christopher Guess.

[Brian Green]

The Christopher Guest. That's right. Funny. For your consideration, is someone buying a $10,000 banner ad to target one of the two separate Academy members who will visit that website on any given day? Why is that? Well, because there are big marketing campaigns that the studio heads put on to first of all, get their movies nominated and then second of all, once nominated, get them to win an award. Because winning an Academy Award has a very lovely, what they call Academy bump. And that means even if you're nominated, but certainly if you win, even if you win, like best technical blowjob fluffer on set, you're going to see more people watching your movie. Because that is a notable effect that happens. It's a rise in viewership based on winning an Academy just nominated. But then if you win, then you get a big bump, of course. And if you win one of the big awards, you get a huge bump. This movie cost 3, 4, 5 million dollars to make. It was a very small budget.

[Reaper]

Low budget.

[Brian Green]

Yes. And everyone went around talking about how small a budget. And we made it, you know, gonzo style and here and there and on set and on location and in these places in New Jersey. So this movie doesn't cost much and then it doesn't make much. I think it made like $40 million worldwide. So, yes, it's a success in the sense that they spent a little bit and they made more. But guess how much they spent on marketing this movie to the Academy?

[Reaper]

I don't know.

[Brian Green]

Almost $20 million.

[Reaper]

Wow.

[Brian Green]

X x. The amount of money that it took to make the movie is what they spent gifting the Academy Award members, I guess wining and dining them, maybe sending them elaborate gifts and taking them on trips. I don't even know. But they're allowed to do it. They're allowed to do it. It's actually frowned upon if you don't. So the reason why they wait till the very last minute to submit their votes is because they want to see how many hand jobs they're going to get. They want to see before the show.

[Reaper]

Things they can get out of it.

[Brian Green]

Wow. Unbelievable. Nothing is sacred anymore. Nothing.

[Reaper]

Yeah, it's not that surprising. Unfortunately.

[Brian Green]

It doesn't. It shocked me, but then for. For like half a second, and then I was like, oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[Reaper]

Totally.

[Brian Green]

They spent more money. Other film this year, marketing to the Academy, any other film. And $20 million is a lot of cash when you're talking about a thousand people that you're trying to target. That's what I do. Quick math in my head. That's $4 million per Academy member if I do that. Minus the one carried three and a half million dollars per Academy member that you're spending marketing your film for an Academy Award. And guess what? It worked. There you go. I did not see one of those movies. That one, Dune two, Wicked, which I.

[Reaper]

Haven'T seen either one of those. But then I saw Nora and I saw Conclave, and there's another one I want to watch the Brutalist. But it's three and a half hours.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it's as long as Adrien Brody speech, first of all. Second of all, I got to, like, gear up. Yeah, we got to take vacation days to watch the Brutalist.

[Reaper]

Block out half a day.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I got to find babysitters to watch that movie. There's very few. Few movies I want to get that invested in. Wicked was two hours and something odd long. I enjoyed it. It kept bouncing along. So I thought, oh, okay, there you go. Dune 2 was a lengthy movie.

[Reaper]

Like the Dunes.

[Brian Green]

You could give me more of that all day long. I do like the Dunes. I'm a Dune kind of guy.

[Reaper]

I need to watch a Dune.

[Brian Green]

You gotta watch it. You have to watch. It's so good and it's so beautifully shot. And the special effects don't look like special effects. It does. They don't give it away. The guy rides a big giant worm and you don't know. You're like, oh, where did they get a big giant worm from?

[Reaper]

Because it's so Realistic in the Never Ending Story.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Atreyu.

[Reaper]

Atreyu.

[Brian Green]

Arturo. He's Italian. He's from the planet of Attilia. Arturo.

[Reaper]

Arturo.

[Brian Green]

So funny.

[Reaper]

You wrote the big flying. I brought you the thing. The statue.

[Brian Green]

I know. It's a dog. What was the dog's name? It was Atreyu and Falkor.

[Reaper]

Falkor.

[Brian Green]

Falkor. That's right. Well, Neverending Story 2 was my favorite.

[Reaper]

I did not see that.

[Brian Green]

Oh, what a piece of trash. What a piece of trash. That was clearly people trying to make a couple bucks off the. The popularity of that movie. I saw that movie in the theater. Scared the out of me because, you know, there's some pretty heavy moments there in that film. But it had boobs, so I like the laser boobs. Laser tits. I love the laser tits. I was all about. It's the first time, I think my mom tried to cover our eyes. And I was like, oh, no, no, no. But my mom got me those nachos. You know, they give you a plate of stale chips. And then they had them. They used to have this. They don't have this anymore because I think they realized it was causing dysentery around the world. Yeah. It's very messy. You would press. You would take that plate of chip, like a little basket of chips. Yeah. And then you would put it under, like, almost like a soda machine, but press the button and cheese would come out. Like cheese Whiz or whatever. Hot cheese. And I. You know. Yeah. My mom was like, what do you want? I'm like, oh, give me the nachos. And she gave me the nachos. And halfway through the movie, I ended up puking all over the back of a seat. Oh, no. Yes. And so I still cannot have that kind of cheese because it reminds me of the bad taste coming out of my mouth.

[Reaper]

Well, that's not a bad thing. That cheese, I don't think is really good for you.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's not cheese. They call it cheese, but it's not really cheese. Yeah. But anyway, Back to Dune 2 is so beautifully shot, so well done. You could give me more of that all day long. That could be four hours long. And I would like it because it's just so good. It's so well acted. Timothy Shalom Zendaya, who could be in anything. She could literally stand still. And I'd enjoy watching her because first.

[Reaper]

Of all, she's really good.

[Brian Green]

She's physically. She's beautiful. She's really appeasing to the eye. But then she's Versatile. She's a really good actress and. And that combination. She has all the things she can do anything and I love it. I love her in Euphoria. I love her in all the movies. She's been just a great actress and I can't wait to see what she does in the future. And Timothy is no slouch himself. He's really good and he's very versatile himself. And then you add in all the, you know, all the other. Javier Bordem and all the other people who are in the movie. It's really well done. And you know, they have that HBO television show, the one based on.

[Reaper]

You talked about that. I haven't seen it.

[Brian Green]

Mother hens, the chicken hens. I don't know what they call them. The Illuminati. I'm not the Illuminations. The mothers who go, you know, the women who go around that planet, you know, whispering in people's ears and making them do things. They made a whole television show about that clan of women that. And how they got to be so powerful and all this other stuff. But because it's not directed by the same person, acted by the same people and they have the same budget to make those kind of visual effects and they don't have the sand worms running around that you can ride. It doesn't feel as weighty or as urgent or as present or pressing.

[Reaper]

Totally different.

[Brian Green]

Totally different. Completely different. I tried to get into it, but you know, I was like, I got seven Little Johnson's to watch. I'm going to be on Max. Let me watch 7 Little Johnston. But you know, there's. It's two and a half hours for the brutalist is too much brutalist as far as I'm concerned.

[Reaper]

Three and a half hours.

[Brian Green]

Three and a half hours. Holy shit.

[Reaper]

Look it up. I'm pretty sure it's. That's why I was saying it's like a half a day.

[Brian Green]

Oh, no, I'm not doing that.

[Reaper]

Yeah, that's not something.

[Brian Green]

Do they have intermission?

[Reaper]

I think they do have an intermission.

[Brian Green]

What you must at three and a half hours long. Dances with Wolves had an intermission in the theaters, if I'm not mistaken. They took like a 10 minute intermission because it's four hours long. So I mean, how can you. How can one person sit for four hours? I haven't to pee or throw up or get more nacho sauce or whatever.

[Reaper]

Where does it say the link?

[Brian Green]

Just ask Chatty GPT Say, how long is the brutalist?

[Reaper]

How long is the movie? The Brutalist three hours and 35 minutes long.

[Brian Green]

No fucking shit. I thought it was two and a half hours long.

[Reaper]

Three and a half.

[Brian Green]

Oh my God. No wonder Adrien Brody took so much time. I mean, geez, seven minute, you know. Congratulations speech is nothing compared to three out, almost four hours. That is dance. That is Dances With Wolves. Let me see here real quick. I just want to see something. Let me. Let's open up another page here.

[Reaper]

You gotta block out four hours of your day.

[Brian Green]

You really do watch that.

[Reaper]

Or evening.

[Brian Green]

Oh yeah. You got. You have to prepare for that. How long is Dances with Wolves? I think it's 3 1/2 hours long too. Great movie, fantastic movies. 3 hours and 1 minute long. This is an X. What?

[Reaper]

It's an extra 34 minutes long.

[Brian Green]

They're telling an entire lifetime of a guy that went out west and danced with the wolves in three hours and one minute. And you can't get the brutalist in in under three hours. It's four hours long. Oh, no, I don't know. I can't do that. That's. No, thank you.

[Reaper]

Yeah, that's at least a two parter.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, make it wicked. Brutalist and brutalist. Brutalist and more brutal and ouch. Brutalist and ouch. Part two. I don't know. I mean, I just like there's no way. I'm not in it. I'm not in for three and a half hours. That's. That's three separate nights of watching.

[Reaper]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

Television for me. I can maybe get 45 minutes in a day of straight watching television. And there's just no way. 3 hours and 35 minutes. I thought it was 2 hours and 35 minutes. And I was convinced I'm not going to watch it at that.

[Reaper]

That was already too long.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that was already way too long for me. The problem, the challenge for directors and writers and producers these days is that prestige television is so good and you have to compete for those eyeballs. And you can tell an entire story in 8, 10, 12 hours of television in a way that used to be done on a big screen in two hours. And there has been a trend lately to make movies shorter and shorter. So. But now I'm seeing it's moving in the other direction because I do think in their mind, like, okay, I wrote the Brutalist. This could be a really good prestige television show. Or I can try and fit the story in in one movie. But even wicked, two and a half hours long or two hours and some change. And it's still. There's still a part two so really they filmed, you know, five hours of content because they filmed it all at one time. So there's going to be another part two. So that's the challenge is you're trying to take a movie and have it compete with these streamers. And these streamers have endless hours that they can dedicate to a storyline. And so I think that's why, it's my opinion why. Anyway, and the studios are probably more willing to do it because they say, well, okay, it may take extra money, but if we can get it on the big screen, that's where we really can make a lot of cash. When the streamers, it just gets lost in a sea of other content. And no one really knows, you know, what's going on. So anyway, no one really knows what's going on. Anyway, It's welcome to 2020. I am in the biz. I'm a big TV guy now, making moves. I got a treatment out there. Anybody want a treatment? I got a treatment. Not. Not for your Uzi penis. I got a treatment like a television treatment. And if you work at television and you want a treatment, give me, text me up there, whatever that phone number is. All right, let's do this. Let's take a break. And when we get back, I have not only do I have next door posts that I've been collecting, I have plenty of Ask TCB's relationship style. So we'll let you take your pick. Or maybe we'll get to both. Maybe we'll just mix them up together and so why don't we take a break and when we get back, we'll do it. All right.

[Jordan Robinson]

Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on tcb. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue. Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears, and I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail. Speaking of mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to tcbpodcast.com and visiting the Contact Us page. You can also find the entire commercial break library audio and video, just in case you want to look at [e-mail] Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-4333, TCB. That's 212433, 3822. Tell us how much you love us and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode or you could make fun of us. That'd be fine too. We might not air that, but maybe. Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text. We'll respond. Now I'm gonna go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors. And then we'll return to this episode of the Commercial break.

[Karen Doubletree]

This episode is sponsored in part by Chime Checking.

[Brian Green]

A few years ago, I was doing.

[Karen Doubletree]

My end of the year bookkeeping and I got got white hot when I realized that I had spent hundreds of dollars in banking and overdraft fees on one of our checking accounts. An unexpected monthly bill comes through a check that's been sitting out there for a while and wha bam. 35, 45, sometimes even $50. No thank you. That stuff adds up over time. But when you open a Chime Checking account, you can be one step closer to a better financial future because with no maintenance fees, fee free overdraft of up to $200, or you can get paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Chime Checking will have you covered and you can make progress on those financial goals that sometimes are hard to achieve. A Chime Checking account allows you fee free overdraft. With Spotme, you can overdraft up to $200 without any fees. With Spot Me when you set up a qualifying direct deposit, are you feeling a little stressed a couple days before your paycheck comes? Well, get my pay. When you set up a qualifying direct deposit, you can make your payday any day. Make progress toward a better financial future with Chime. Open your account in two [e-mail] commercial that's chime.com commercial Chime feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp NA or Stride Bank NA members. FEIC Spot Me eligibility requirements and overdraft limits do apply. Fees apply at out of network ATMs. MyPay eligibility requirements do apply. Credit limits range from $20 to $500. $2 fee applies to get funds instantly. Chime Checking account required. Go to chime.com disclosures for more details. And thanks to Chime Checking for being a sponsor of the commercial break, I'm.

[Chris Oley]

Jordan Robinson, host of the new podcast the Women's Hoop Show. Each episode I'll be joined by a rotating group of women's basketball experts to talk wnba, college hoops, the new unrivaled league and the shifting landscape of the sport. The game is growing and so are we. Listen to and follow the Women's Hoop show and Odyssey Podcast available now for free on the Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Karen Doubletree]

This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. As a lifelong entrepreneur and a current small business owner of a mediocre comedy podcast, I do earnestly get excited when I get to share a tool or a resource that I use to better my business. And along with being a longtime entrepreneur, I am a longtime customer of Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online, whether you're scaling a larger business or you're just starting out. We are currently helping one of our family members build a website on Squarespace. And like everybody else in the world, they want to use video to highlight their products and services. Squarespace makes that easy by allowing you to upload and organize your videos, create stunning libraries, and even monetize that content by adding a paywall. And now Squarespace even offers business loans. You can get fast, easy finance through Squarespace Capital. And if you're approved, it'll be in your bank account in three to four business days so that you can grow quickly. Of course, all loans are subject to credit approval, but just the knowledge that Squarespace is now trying to help business owners and entrepreneurs in many facets of their business journey puts another check mark on my personal endorsement. So go ahead, check all this out for [e-mail] commercial and you'll get a free trial. And then when you're ready to launch, you can use the offer code commercial and you'll save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's squarespace.com commercial. Then use that offer code commercial to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. And thank you to Squarespace for continuing to support entrepreneurs like myself and the commercial break.

[Brian Green]

I can see greasy little paw prints all over my table here. And I'm wondering exactly which one of my children has, I mean, they come in here all the time and I, and I like, I like to have them in here. You know, my dad was one of those guys that like went in his office was his office and he never let us in. It was all off limits. But he had all the twinkly, winkly, sparkly things in there. And that's of course, sometimes what I wanted to play with. He had the computer long before computers were in, generally in homes. And so we liked that office. But he was a no go zone. No, no zone for us, for the kids. But I'm telling you what the. I don't want to be that dad. So I invite My children in here. But every time, I end up spending an hour and a half reconfiguring the studio. Because the one rule is don't touch the equipment. And the one thing they do is touch the equipment. Even when I'm here, I'll be like, I'll turn my back for two seconds and they're over here pressing all the.

[Reaper]

Buttons in here without. Without the equipment.

[Brian Green]

Well, they do gymnastics. They make movies. Sometimes I let them talk in the microphones to make their own show. That'll never get hurt. You know this. They're taken after Daddy. They, like. They see Daddy doing something and they take after. All right, so. So your choice. Ask TCB next door. What do you want to do this segment?

[Reaper]

Let's sprinkle in a little next door.

[Brian Green]

All right, let's do next door. Bam. People are idiots where I live. All right, this is Nextdoor. I have now taken the Nextdoor app so I don't have to scroll through nextdoor. Saving them doesn't make any sense because I still have to scroll through all of them. So I wrote them down here. And I also found on the Internet a place where some people are posting their favorite Nextdoors. So I'm kind of. I'm taking it to some from there and some from local. And I've been collecting them over the last. I don't know, since the last time we did this a month ago or a month and a half ago. And here we go. You ready?

[Reaper]

I'm ready.

[Brian Green]

Could everyone please be quiet for a couple of days? I'm trying to catch up on sleep, and it's very loud. Sure, sure, Grandma Greta, no problem. Shut up. Hey, by the way, Grandma Greta, I feel you. I wish everyone would shut up too. I got those fucking landscapers out here now. They're here at 6 in the morning.

[Reaper]

It's crazy nice.

[Brian Green]

For the past three weeks, a cat has been following me on my daily walks. I'm worried the owner may have trained the cat to follow people, and now he's lost his way. Picture of cat not included, by the way. Not included.

[Reaper]

You can't train a cat.

[Brian Green]

No. You can't train a cat. No. Those creatures are weird. Yeah, they're. It's like having a wild squirrel in your house. You just hope that they don't attack. I was watching this video the other day, this YouTube video, and it was like, there's two cats and a dog in the house, and a kid is getting a snack in the kitchen. It's like a. It's like a One of those in home cameras, right? So the kid's getting a snack in the kitchen, and one of the cats is at his feet, turns around, knocks into the cat on accident. The cat freaks out, screams, you know, and runs away. And the other cat. And he hits the other cat. Well, the other cat attacks the first cat and then runs and attacks the kid. He's like, you know, biting and scratching the kid. And then the dog comes and knocks the kid over, attacking the cat. It's chaos.

[Reaper]

I love watching this.

[Brian Green]

And I was like, oh, no cats for me. No, thanks. On my 2.5 mile walk with my dog, I saw a total of 13American flags. I was hoping to see more. What's wrong with this country?

[Reaper]

I was hoping to see more.

[Brian Green]

This is from my side of town, by the way. You saw 13 and 2.5 miles. You were hoping to see more. I'm out of butter. Can someone please help me? And call Walmart to deliver to this corner naming the streets. I will be around all day. I'll be all day. Can someone please call Walmart for me? Me? Sure, no problem. Random question. Does anyone have a dash hound I might be able to take a picture with? That's creepy. That's creepy. Something's going on there we need to know about. Hey, out of curiosity, does anyone know what day Covid ended? Sure. January 14th. Kid, you're all good. Please shut up. Hi, neighbors. I'm Patrick. That's all.

[Reaper]

It's like the starfish.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Blocked channel. Here we go. Urgent help. My son visited and blocked Fox News on my TV. I don't trust digital or anything. ITunes. Fox is all that should be allowed in my household. How can I unblock Fox? I told my son that I'm taking him out of the will and he needs to put Fox back on my tv. Please help immediately.

[Reaper]

Oh, my God. Did anybody respond?

[Brian Green]

No. Well, I didn't put any of the responses unless I thought they were really funny. I don't think actually this had any. I think this is, like, fresh when I saw it. But I'm sure this is coming from my mom's retirement home. I'm sure of it. I found a can of beans. They are Bush's brand. Bush's Best, to be exact. They were found on this street last night. If you lost a can of beans, tell me what kind of flavor they are and you can pick them up.

[Reaper]

Just for, you know, security's sake.

[Brian Green]

Wow. Yeah, just. Just to make sure. Bean owner. Yes, Please show me a receipt and I'll be happy to Give them back to you. I really can't keep them. I have too many beans already. To which someone said, do you have a picture? Do you have a picture? I don't know if they're trolling or not, but that's a pretty funny comment. Anyone have anything new to argue about? I'm sick of politics and pandemic. Anyone have some strong opinions on the best actor or who should play the next Batman or which band is better than the Beatles? Anything? I'd like to have a conversation. I think you're just lonely, bro. Yeah, talk to Chad, GPT. He'll have an argument with you. She he. It. The they. Hi, all. Now, we all use devices connected to the Internet and whatnot. And my grandkids come over and they use their phones and their iPads, too. Well, the other day my grandson went to connect to the WI fi and our neighbor's router is named all the cops are buttholes. Now, my wife is very upset. She started crying. She was upset that our neighbors are rude and using words like buttholes. Any idea. Any thoughts on how I should approach the situation?

[Reaper]

Well, first of all, you can't. You can see that you don't know where it's coming, which house or apartment it's coming from.

[Brian Green]

It's probably some dude in a van stealing your credit card information.

[Reaper]

He doesn't have a. He definitely doesn't have a flag. American Flag, Yes.

[Brian Green]

Is it possible to sue the networks for harassment? TV networks, some commercials, Southwest Airlines, Progressive Insurance, Geico and Medic and Medicine commercials appear over and over again. And I'm starting to feel harassed. Please don't tell me to mute or change the channels. I am asking specifically about the logistics of suing the networks. You're asking for legal advice on Nextdoor. Hey, listen, I don't know. People have won money for stupider shit. Trust me, that's true. Yeah. An arrow just landed in my backyard. I'm very concerned. My dog was barking an arrow. Where do you live? Sherwood Forest. What are you doing over there? My dog was barking his head off in the backyard, and my husband went out to try and figure out what was going on. And this woman was standing on something in the neighbor's yard. Her head was peeking above our fence, telling us the arrow had accidentally shot into my yard. It was a 2.5 foot arrow. Wow, that's a big one. And she was trying to tell my husband, yeah, it's not dangerous. Don't worry. I have my own kids and animals in the backyard. What would you do Tell your neighbor to stop shooting arrows in your backyard.

[Reaper]

She's probably practicing her archery.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, she's bad at it, but she's practicing. I. You know what I would do? Stay out of the yard for a few days.

[Reaper]

That's best.

[Brian Green]

To the person who assumes my cat is homeless. Oh, I think this might be related to the other one. Ready? Okay. To the person who assumes my cat is homeless. He's not. Recently he has been coming in looking especially groomed. And he is a rough and tumble cat from lives outside. His fur feels luxurious. Luxurious. But I'm salty because he doesn't let me brush him. I saved him from the needle and adopted him about six years ago. So please leave my cat alone. Stop taking care of him.

[Reaper]

The one that. The one that was.

[Brian Green]

The one that was walking.

[Reaper]

Please stop taking care of him.

[Brian Green]

Suspicious driver. The last few nights my husband has had reason to be driving. Has had a reason to be driving around the city at 2 or 3am Three of the nights he has seen cars. One on each night, all different. They come from major streets in and out of our neighborhoods. They drive slowly around houses. One stopped in front of a house, but he didn't see anyone get out while he was there. He followed the car and after it took a left into our neighborhood, it sped up and ran the light. Does anybody see these suspicious cars? Also, should we pursue? Should we pursue? Yeah, everything. Everything turns out great when you pursue random, strange cars at three in the morning. That's exactly the advice the cops would give you.

[Reaper]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Have you heard of my story about chasing my own stolen car down into the east side of Atlanta? Yes, but I had the cops with me, so that was a little bit different. I work for Lyft as a driver and I usually work late night hours to give people rides home from the bars. The last few nights I've noticed the same old man following me around in his car at 2 or 3am I think he's stalking me. I tried to switch to my wife's car the next night, but he found me. And he still followed me to customers, houses and through other neighborhoods. I finally got scared and ran a red light to get away from him.

[Reaper]

Is this the same car that the other people were saying?

[Brian Green]

Right. Exactly. Who knows? I don't know. These are two. No, this is not connected. But then he says, can anyone help me find this man? Not pictured. Sure. You don't give any description about your car, his car, the neighborhood that you were in?

[Reaper]

Why would you need that?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, exactly. I was at this restaurant And I saw two kids, one of which had a trench coat on and the other and standing on another one's shoulders. I think they were trying to pass as adults to get alcohol. That's gotta be a joke. That's gotta be a joke.

[Reaper]

Yeah, that's like out of a movie.

[Brian Green]

That's a good one. I like that one. Cheers to you, sir. That's a good one. To the neighbor who mows their lawn every single day. Please stop. It's grass, not back hair. I agree with you, bro. I got a guy who blows leaves in the middle of summer. There's no leaves. Stop it. Does anyone else hear that humming noise at 3am or is it just in my head? The comment is, do you have your TV on at night? He responds, yes, goes, unplug the tv. Lost Roomba. My Roomba was clean.

[Reaper]

A rogue Roomba.

[Brian Green]

I had my rogue. I had my Roomba cleaning an area rug that's outside of my porch. It escaped under the fence. If anyone sees it, please return it. What are you doing to that Roomba? Dude? You fucking it. That Roomba had to get away from you. The squirrels in my. Squirrels in my yard have been acting awfully suspicious lately. Anybody else notice this?

[Reaper]

What is suspicious?

[Brian Green]

What are they doing? What are they doing? They're filming X rated squirrel porn. They're whacking each other off in the backyard. Offering a free couch, slightly used, may contain my cat.

[Reaper]

You should put up one that said that.

[Brian Green]

I thought the same exact thing. Did anyone else see that guy dressed like Victorian times at the grocery store? I know this is a weird question, but do you believe in time travel? Because I think he might have been a time traveler somehow. I want to think this is a troll, but I think it's probably not.

[Reaper]

Probably it's real.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. To the person who keeps putting their mail in my mailbox. I know where you live. My dog keeps escaping despite the invisible fence. Does anyone know of any invisible fence recommendations? And the other guy goes, well, I'd help you, but it's kind of hard to see. It's good to know there's some friends out there. You know what I'm saying? That there are all these crazy people. There's some friends out there. To the person who took my lawn gnome during my garage sale. That wasn't for sale and I want it back. Okay, we'll get it right back to you. Found a pineapple on my porch this morning. Does anyone know what this means? Is anyone missing a pineapple? Yes, I do know what that means. That means Someone wants to fuck your wife. Whoever decorated the stop sign with the googly eyes. Please stop. It's confusing drivers. Is it really? As if. As if your entire life that sign, shape and color has not been embedded into your brain. Someone keeps ringing my doorbell at 2am and leaving a rubber ducky on the porch. What does this mean? I don't know, dude. That actually sounds kind of scary.

[Reaper]

Yeah, that is.

[Brian Green]

Who's playing the bagpipes? It's very beautiful, but it's very early.

[Reaper]

Oh, that was you, Brian.

[Brian Green]

I know.

[Reaper]

Practicing for Lord of the Acid.

[Brian Green]

That's right. Lords of the Acid Live. Philip Savina, Lords of the Acid. Watch Brian have a complete anxiety meltdown on stage while playing the bagpipes. While playing the bagpipes backed by Mike Gordon from Fish. I found. Found one shoe on this street. If you're hopping around looking for it, let me know. Someone keeps stealing my cat's toys from the porch. I guess we have a cat burglar in the neighborhood. Does anyone have a unicycle I can borrow? Asking for a friend. There's one more here. Okay. Oh, no. That was it. Okay. All right. So that was it. That was all the ones I got. Those were good.

[Reaper]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

That's good. Thank you. Internet, you win every time. Internet, you win every single time. All right, let's do this. We'll take a short break, and when we come back, we'll do some ask TCB's relationship style. So if you've been waiting to get this question answered for a year, I'm gonna get to it.

[Reaper]

We're here.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. We're here for you. We're here for you. I want to leave enough time. I don't want to, like, be responsible for anyone's shitty relationship. So I just wait a long time till I'm sure it's already worked itself out, and then give the advice, and hopefully you'll have taken it by then. All right, we'll be back.

[Jordan Robinson]

Let me do something Brian has never done. Be brief. Follow us on Instagram at the commercial brief break. Text or call us 212-4333. TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Visit our website, tcbpodcast.com for all the audio, video, and your free sticker. Then watch all the [e-mail] the commercial break and finally share the show. It's the best gift you could give a few aging podcasters. See, Brian, that really wasn't that difficult, now, was it? You're welcome.

[Chris Oley]

Where'd you get those shoes easy. They're from dsw. Because DSW has the exact right shoes for whatever you're into right now. You know, like the sneakers that make office hours feel like happy hour, the boots that turn grocery aisles into runways, and all the styles that show off the many sides of you, from daydreamer to multitasker, and everything in between. Because you do it all in really great shoes. Find a shoe for every you at your DSW store or dsw.com if you've been struggling with your weight, Mochi Health is here to help. Mochi Health is a long term weight loss solution personalized to fit your unique needs and goals. Meet one on one with board certified obesity doctors and registered dietitians who are on a mission to listen. Eligible patients can Access custom formulated GLP1 medications at an affordable set price and get them delivered to their home each month. Take our free [e-mail] and use code AUDIO40 at checkout for $40 off your first month of membership.

[Brian Green]

All right, so I have a bunch of Ask TCBS relationship related that I have had forever. I mean, some of them are. I know, guys, I'm sorry, but honestly, sometimes it just takes me a while to get to it. And you have to. I have to compile them. The TCB hotline is a great idea if we actually had a way of managing all the text messages that come through in like one neat, nice little package. And I know they have apps that do this for us, but honestly, sometimes they get buried. You know, buried, buried, buried, buried, buried. And then I have to go back to it, and I have to go, oh, that's right. That person asked a question and whatever, blah, blah, blah. You get it. We're unorganized here, okay? One idiot running the ship. It's Two Ding a Lings and a Yingling. All right, so as you see, drinking. Yeah, well, that's the name of the last episode. I put. A Ying a Ying a Ling. Wait, Ying a Lings Twins. Ying a Lings Darcy sings. And Two Ding a Lings. Don't think I like that. Okay, all right, so you want funny ones or you want more serious ones? You want me to mix them up?

[Reaper]

Yeah, you gotta mix them up. They're all funny.

[Brian Green]

Okay, here, here's one. Now, I'm, I. I think this is serious, but I'm not 100% sure. And so you can tell us, Thomas, you can tell us. Text me and let me know if this was a serious question. But we got this a long time ago when we reviewed about the lady who thought she was a cat and the guy who was dating her. Remember, the girl was, like, 20 years old, and he was, like, 56 years old, and she was, like, super slinky and sexy, and he had her running around the house like she was a cat. Milk? Yeah. Pissing in a litter box and all kind of crazy shit. Hey, guys, I just love the show, but I have a quick question. My girlfriend of two years has recently decided that she, in fact, is a cat. Now, I think this might be one of those people who, like, they think they're an animal. Do you know what I'm talking about? This is, like, hot right now. It's a trend for these kids to believe, truly believe, that they are an animal. They can morph into an animal. They can do this. Not for me to say whether or not you're an actual cat, but okay. She's now hissing when she's mad. She naps in weird places curled up like a ball. And last week, she wanted to drink milk straight from a bowl on the floor. I saw you guys do this episode, and believe me, this is true. People do do this. Do I need to call a therapist, or do I just lean into it and buy her a scratching post?

[Reaper]

Well, first of all, do you like cats? Are you a cat person?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. First of all, do you have a litter box? If you have a litter box, it's all good. Don't worry about it. Listen, milk is a lot less expensive than a fancy restaurant, so I'd say lean into the things that are positive about this. If she's hissing at, I don't know, you like your back scratched? You like someone making muffins on your chest in the morning. Hey, listen. There you go. You got it. All right? And, you know, I guess it's cool, dude.

[Reaper]

I'll do it for a little while.

[Brian Green]

But if all of a sudden. If all of a sudden she woke up and started acting like a cat, you probably want to get a therapist involved. But I'd let it roll for a few days, you know, see if there's some kind of weird sex you can have.

[Reaper]

That feels good.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it feels good. All right, let's go to a serious one. Yeah, I wouldn't worry about this too much, and you're not giving us a bunch of details, but if she, like, literally didn't just, like, flip a switch and become crazy cat lady overnight, then I just say it's a mo. She's having a moment. She's into a fetish or whatever it is and let her roll with it for a little while. If it's not harming anybody, then who cares? Although it is a little strange when your girlfriend goes, can you pour me some milk? Into a bowl and lapping it up. That's what my kids do. My kids are weird, though. Children are strange. All right. My partner never apologizes, even when they are clearly wrong. Okay, so Tammy says she loves the show. I've been with my partner for three years, and I'm starting to notice a pattern. They never apologize, even when it's obvious they have messed something up. They'll either double down, change the subject, or somehow make it my fault. I'm exhausted from having the same argument over and over. It never gets through. There's never an apology, even though there are situations where she has clearly been wrong all this time. Is this a red flag or am I being sensitive as she's telling me that I am? Well, Tammy.

[Reaper]

So she's gaslighting too.

[Brian Green]

Yes, she's gaslighting. She's never apologizing. Listen, I have said this before on this show. The number one lesson I have learned about relationships and life in general, Know which hills to die on and which ones not to. Even when I'm right sometimes or I feel that I'm strongly right, I let it go. I let it go and I say, okay, that's fine, because there's. I'm not going to be a right fighter. Right. Fighting leads to so many fucking arguments, it's not even funny. And so if it's a small. Yeah, it makes life harder. So if it's small shit, just leave it alone. Who fucking cares if it's big shit? Like, you're like, she's really in the wrong. Yeah, that's. That's a problem. And that is that, you know, you might have to go to therapy for that one. And this is not the place to get therapy, that's for sure, Chrissy. And I don't know from shinola, but I would say that, like, if she really never apologizes and she's doing things or saying things, are arguing things that are clearly in the wrong, like in, like, black and white reality, everyone would go, oh, yeah, you're in the right. She's in the wrong, and she just refuses to apologize. That's a certain kind of illness. It's called right fighting. And it drives me up a wall. Anybody who's a right fighter drives me up a wall. So, you know, you got to just decide whether or not this is a big enough deal to you. Yeah, something you can live with or something. You can't. Oh, this is Janice. Janice says every single night. My husband is. For the last two years, my husband starts their dinner conversation with. So today I was on cryptocurrencytrader.com. my husband has become a crypto bro, and I cannot take it. I haven't. I won't. And yet he won't stop. Last night, I caught him. I caught him trying to make NFTs out of some of our wedding photos.

[Reaper]

What?

[Brian Green]

And he has become the person I despise the most. An uninformed. An uninformed moron. What would you do? Oh. So Astrid and I have had this conversation.

[Reaper]

You have?

[Brian Green]

No, not about NFTs. No. Not about crypto. No. This is the argument that we have had, given the whole situation with Love is Blind and then Unmarried at First Sight and then a couple of other television shows that we either have in the background or we've watched together. There have been breakups due to political differences. Like, I don't think I could be with this person because this is what they believe. And the question that's always gone on in our mind is how in 2025. And then there's, like, specifically some people in our inner circle who have divided households, and they're, like, recently divided. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like, in this last election, one went one way, one went the other way, and now it's causing a bunch of drama. At least that's what I hear. It's causing a bunch of drama. And some people are really struggling how they wrap their heads around how this supposed idiot is living in our house. No matter what you think the other side, clearly everyone is very tribalistic right now. And how do you ignore what one side of the fence is doing supposedly to our country? No matter what side of the fence you are on, you probably demonize the other side for what they supposedly are doing to our country. And how do you have a marriage with that person where you got to interact with them every day and they clearly don't think the same way that you do. Can you do that? And I think the intention of the question is this is where she's going with it. Like, he's become this dude that I just dislike altogether. Like, kind of this amalgamation of all these, you know, kind of a lug nut, so to speak. Right. How do I deal with that? Get a divorce. That's what I'm gonna say. That's my advice to you. Get a divorce. Call a divorce attorney. That's it. I don't know. I don't know how you do that in 2025. If it was me, I don't know that I could deal with having someone so diametrically opposed to everything that I think is right and good and live with that. I don't know. I don't know how you do that. You're a better woman than I. Yeah, I don't know.

[Reaper]

I mean, this is a. This is. We're talking about, like, getting into crypto. So, I mean, I guess if you really love this person and you want to make this. This work, I guess you could maybe dip your toe into crypto a little bit. Maybe kind of try to see it from their point of view, see what they find so intriguing about it. But if you don't really care for this person, this is a good way. This is a good out.

[Brian Green]

This is a good out. This is a great out. You wait, he wasted my money on crypto.

[Reaper]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

But I'll share with you. I stripped some of the politics from this. But this goes deeper than just crypto. Crypto is like just kind of example. Okay, so that's why I kind of went off on a rant there. I probably should have added that at the beginning and not at the end, but, you know, you get what I'm.

[Reaper]

Saying is like, you know, you understand really, really hard.

[Brian Green]

Listen, is the dick good? Because if the dick is good, maybe you just ignore some of it. Yeah, yeah, but you guys have been together for a long time. The dick can't be that good. You know what I'm saying? Like, eventually we all get used to the dick. I had a friend, same guy who said, you're at that age where you're scared of pussy, used to say the following. Show me a hot girl and I'll show you a guy who's sick of fucking her. Right?

[Reaper]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And never truer words have been said. And it replace the girl with he, they, them, whatever it is, it's true. Show me a hot guy. I'll show you a girl who's sick of fucking him. Right. It's just the way that it goes eventually. And so, I don't know, you gotta just kind of.

[Reaper]

For a woman even, it's. It's very emotional too, so tied to that person. Not even just so physical. So I can see how that would be affecting many other parts of many.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Yeah. It's in your head. It's in your living room. It's at your dinner table. I don't know if. And especially if you won't shut up about it. Yeah, maybe you just say, listen, we don't believe the same thing, so let's.

[Reaper]

Not talk about it.

[Brian Green]

Just talk about the bills.

[Reaper]

Can you pay them with the crypto you just bought?

[Brian Green]

That's it. Okay. My family's girlfriend is treating me like an outsider. I'm summarizing these, but so that we get a little teaser beforehand. I'm dating my. My. I've been dating my girlfriend for over a year, and her family still acts like I'm some guy she met yesterday. I try to be friendly. I offer my help at family events. I step in when I can to be there in certain situations where I feel I need to be there, but they barely acknowledge me. Meanwhile, her sister's boyfriend, who she's been with for less than two months, is practically groomed for sainthood by the family. Should I say something to my girlfriend or just accept the fact that my family isn't my biggest fan yet? Well, it's not starting off great, bro. No, I was gonna say, you gotta find a new girlfriend. Sorry, gotta say it. You gotta find a new girlfriend.

[Reaper]

I can't believe that she also has not brought it up.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. This is like, you guys have been together for a year and you haven't talked about this.

[Reaper]

Yeah, it seems like maybe she would even be like. Yeah, I'd noticed. There's a big difference.

[Brian Green]

Is she even your girlfriend, or are you just showing up to your friend's random events and hoping that things turn out okay? Yeah, yeah. You gotta have conversation about stuff like this. You get. Should you mention something. You should have mentioned something the first time it happened. Absolutely. Gotta communicate about these kind of things. But if her family doesn't like you and she's involved with her family a lot, there is zero chance it's going to work out well in the long run. I'm sure there are certainly exceptions to that rule, but not that I've seen. Yeah, not that I've seen. Listen, I was married. I've been married twice. And you know this if you listen to the show. My first wife, I. I loved her immediate family. And I think for the most part, at least up until the very, very end, when, of course, you have to pick a side. They liked me too. Right. But it was just three members of the family. Mother and the other two, the brother and the sister. And we seem to all get along very well for a very long time.

[Reaper]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And then one side of her extended family, I really enjoyed their company. I felt like we also got along very well. I Think they would. At least I would hope they would say the same thing about me. But there was the other side of the family, like, you know, the other side of the extended family. It was clear I was not the chosen one. They did not want some scrappy, you know, in their minds, libtard, even though I wasn't. But that's what they assumed about me. Libtard, poor, you know, wearing a chain around his wallet kind of guy. They wanted some French aristocracy, you know, they wanted some French aristocrat to come in. And yeah, there's some preppy, went to the right schools, did the right things, you know, worked at the hedge fund kind of guy. And I just wasn't that dude. I was never going to be that dude. But it was clear from the moment that I met them, and they even made that known, like, out loud at family events. So I felt very uncomfortable around that side of the family. I was never good enough enough for this lady in their eyes, was my impression. And since they said it out loud, I'm pretty sure I was getting that one right on the nose. And that never sat well with me. And I'm not sure that if they. We had stayed married 20 years in that. That things would be great between us because I think I would feel very shitty about all of that, you know, just not fitting into their family. Like, I think I. I don't think it would have been a good feeling now. It gave me a complex, and I still have that complex to that day. Thanks. Thanks. Ex wifey and your extended family, you know who you are. I don't need to tell you, of course. I really hope that my ex wife isn't listening to the show, but she probably is. She probably is. You know, if you've got an ex boyfriend or girlfriend that does a podcast four days a week, you're probably gonna tune in every once in a while too, just to find out. Just to say, yep, I made the right choice getting a divorce from that guy. I sure did. All right, let's do two more. One more, one more, one more. I adore my girlfriend, but he eats like a literal trash panda. He's hunched over the coffee table the other night, gnawing on a rotisserie chicken like a caveman. He refuses to use napkins, instead wiping his hands on his own shirt, or worse, sometimes the kitchen towel. Do I stage an intervention or just start feeding him on the porch? Okay, stop being silly. Your boyfriend doesn't have manners. Manners is something that gets taught to you as a child.

[Reaper]

He become your Boyfriend?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. How did he become your boyfriend? Did you not notice that he was slopping up his food like an idiot? I mean, listen, young lady, you, manners are something that get bred into you at a very young age. And you, it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks, trust me. And I am beating my children over the side of their head with the manners thing because so many people in this day and age don't any respect. Manners, chivalry, none of it. And I'm sorry, I still believe in that kind of stuff. I think it makes you a well rounded human being that can adjust in any situation.

[Reaper]

Manners matter.

[Brian Green]

Manners do matter. And if your guy doesn't have manners and he's over the age of 20, it's going to be really hard for him to start picking them up. Now, small things can change big and all of the stuff is not going to change at one time. So my advice to you, find a new, new boyfriend. That's all you gotta. That's all I gotta say.

[Reaper]

Definitely don't feed him from a trough or whatever she said.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, feed him outside. Okay. Just get a new boyfriend. Don't bother. Put him out on the porch. Don't put him out on the porch. Just don't bother having him around. Okay. All right.

[Reaper]

I do love those sdc. We gotta do more this second.

[Brian Green]

Oh, I got more. I got more. So we can do more. I got lots more. Okay. Well, I'd like to thank. Well, I'm trying to adjust my glasses here. They look good. Oh, thank you very much. Thank you very much. I'd like to thank our guest this week, Aaron Weber, one more time. He was great. And on a second listen to the show, I think he was really great on the show actually. Aaron Weber's new 30 minute comedy special produced by Nate Bargazzi is available on, on YouTube links in the show notes. Go listen to the episode on Tuesday. He's really funny. He's, he's just a good guy. He's also got some tour dates coming up so you can go to Aaron Weber.com and check him out. If he's coming into a town near you, go see him. He's one of these comics you're not going to pay 500 to go see. It's probably 30 bucks for a ticket. You can sit in the front row.

[Reaper]

Yeah, he's funny.

[Brian Green]

Get yourself a couple drinks and have a good day.

[Reaper]

If you're Nashville, maybe look him up.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, he's at Zane Zanies a lot is what I've noticed. He's the Zany's regular, so that if you're there, go check him out. And the Nashville Comedy Fest is coming up here in a couple weeks as this is being released. So if you're up in Nashville, go see that. Go say hi to our good friend Veer Das. Tell him the commercial break said hello. He'll probably run from the stage. Who? Oh, those guys. Yeah. Okay. All right, thanks. I got a therapy session in a couple minutes. I'll talk to my therapist about it. Hey, listen, we did the best that we could given the circumstances. We were newbies and we're still newbies, but we haven't, we haven't gotten much better, according to some people on YouTube. I'll share that on tomorrow's episode. Oh, yeah, remind me to tell you about Kathleen Madigan and her rabid fans who dislike me with a passion. Wow. Okay, I don't care. Whatever. I care, but I don't care. It's all too confusing. TCP podcast.com all the audio, all the video right there from one location. You can also get your free swag drop down menu on the contact us button says I want my free sticker. Give us your physical address and we'll send you a sticker. 212-4333 TCB 212-3822 Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas or leave us a voicemail at the commercial break on Instagram YouTube.com thecommercial break for all the videos the same day. They air here on the audio. Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.

[Reaper]

I think so.

[Brian Green]

I love you.

[Reaper]

I love you.

[Brian Green]

Best to you and best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say we do say and we must say goodbye.

[Reaper]

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