Hotel! Motel! Harry Denton's!

Summary

The Commercial Break – "Hotel! Motel! Harry Denton's!"

Release Date: August 23, 2024
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley

Overview

In this improv-heavy, nostalgia-steeped episode, Bryan and Krissy riff on everything from 80s-90s dating game shows (specifically, "Love Connection") to messy celebrity news and overpriced concert tickets. The tone is breezy, irreverent, and self-aware—the podcast at its most "Cheesecake Factory"—as the hosts gleefully unpack pop culture oddities, relationship drama, and bygone nightlife (notably San Francisco’s legendary Harry Denton's). The main portion centers on watching and reacting to cringey "Love Connection" clips, mining them for perennial awkwardness, mid-80s etiquette, and culture shock.

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Key Topics & Discussion Points

1. Bennifer's Breakup & Paparazzi Realities

[00:21–02:47]

• Bryan opens with mock, deadpan "Breaking News" about the end of Ben Affleck & Jennifer Lopez’s marriage:

  "Why did you marry Jennifer fucking Lopez? She’s never not going to be famous till the day that she dies. She will have paparazzi following her and probably you too, Ben. It's just the way it is."
  – Bryan (01:20)

• Both hosts joke about overreacting to the breakup, with Krissy pretending to be devastated.

• Bryan pokes fun at celebrity life expectations versus reality:

  "He [Ben] seems like just a normal dude, right, trying to make his way through life, you know, getting sober or... dealing with his demons like all of us."
  – Bryan (01:44)

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2. Concert Ticket Prices & 90s Nostalgia

[03:04–09:51]

• Discussion of Green Day (and other 90s band) struggling to sell tickets in Atlanta.

• General laments about post-pandemic ticket prices and overabundance of reunion tours:

  "There’s only so much that someone can regale us with the early 90s music... I don’t have tens of thousands of dollars to spend on these, and there’s some of those bands I just don’t care if they got back together."
  – Bryan (08:46)

• "Live events" have become expensive and saturated.

• Bryan notes, “There are some Frappuccinos at Starbucks that cost more money than it's gonna cost to see us live. That's no joke." (04:30)

• The wedge salad and “half wedge” tangent—mocking dinner ticket packages with sad portions:

  "Have you ever eaten a whole wedge? …There is no human that’s eaten a whole wedge salad."
  –Bryan & Krissy (05:14–05:22)

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3. Separating Art from Artist – Michael Jackson & Matthew Perry

[10:10–18:51]

• Bryan’s kids discover Michael Jackson, sparking a deep-dive on whether it’s possible to “separate the art from the person.”

• Krissy: “But sometimes it’s hard to do…” (10:54)

• Bryan recounts awkwardly dodging deeper questions from his kids:

  "Mainly, is it a boy or a girl?...I don’t know, who’s to say? I think it’s a boy. Right? And that’s the question they keep asking."
  – Bryan (11:35)

• Shifts to news about Matthew Perry’s death and the “ketamine queen” prescribing him excess drugs:

  “If you're already selling on the black market, you're not thinking that.”
  – Krissy (15:29)

• Bryan is scathing on unethical medical professionals:

  “You just say, oh yeah, no problem, I'll give you another hundred vials knowing that you just went through 100 vials in a week. In a week. Dude, slow down. You're going to kill yourself.”
  – Bryan (15:54)

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4. Main Event: Love Connection Nostalgia Watch Party

[19:06–59:07]

Setting the Stage: 80s/90s Dating Games Are Wild

[19:06–23:44]

• Bryan marvels at the Love Connection format: Physical addresses exchanged with near-strangers before blind dates, and the absence of modern safety concerns.
• Krissy and Bryan recall their running bit about how everyone on these shows seems to age rapidly:

  "People aged really quickly back then. Or we're aging really slowly."
  – Bryan (20:14)

First Clip: Robin & Kurt – The Disaster Date

[23:44–40:11]

• Kurt, described as monotone, slags Robin for not being “deep,” then backhandedly compliments her body and pays nothing—not even his hotel.

• Robin claps back, calling him boring and exposing his lack of manners and mooching:

  "I had to get myself down there, too."
  – Robin (39:26)

• The infamous Harry Denton's nightclub makes an appearance:

  "We went to a nightclub called Harry Denton's, which is one of the classiest nightclubs in San Francisco."
  – Robin (28:02)

• Bryan riffs on Harry Denton’s, imagining cocaine-use policies and spritzed glass straws—a running joke.

• Audience loves Robin for standing her ground (modern read: she rules, he sucks).

• Notable Bryan burn:

  "This guy sounds like a miserable prick who, you know, needs to find someone that lives up to his terribly high standards."
  – Bryan (38:23)

Second Clip: Bob & Olinda – Skydiving on the First Date

[41:14–58:23]

• Bob opens with sexist comments about women drivers, then reveals himself to be “confident” (arrogant).

• Audience picks Olinda as his date—her sister deems Bob "the biggest jerk in history."

• Bob takes Olinda skydiving for their first date (!) and gives her a back massage by the pool beforehand.

• More awkward narration as Bryan and Krissy break down the sweaty, strange sequence of events:

  "Let’s break this down for a second… He has a bad impression with the sister, then comes, picks her up. They're going skydiving. They drive to the desert where there is a pool. She takes off her shirt. Then he's walking around trying to get into trouble, and then he decides to come over and give her a massage."
  – Krissy (52:12)

• Olinda is unphased and positive; Bob gets sick after one jump, but both say they'd do it again.

• Chuck Woolery seems relieved the story didn’t end in flames; Bryan quips about their future:

  "Love it. I doubt it, Bob. Seemed like a real...I don't think she's gonna stay with him. Yeah, I just don't.”
  – Bryan (58:25)

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5. Recap & TCB Live Promo

[58:23–end]

• Bryan laments the impossibility of tracking down Love Connection contestants now.

• The episode wraps with plugs for TCB’s upcoming live shows in Florida—Dania Beach Improv and The Funny Bone in Orlando—and the usual plea for reviews and social follows.

  "Don't buy from any scalpers who are trying to charge thousands of dollars for the Commercial Break tickets. You can get them pretty cheap..."
  – Bryan (60:23)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• [01:44] Bryan: “He seems like just a normal dude, right, trying to make his way through life, you know, getting sober or... dealing with his demons like all of us.”
• [04:30] Bryan: “There are some Frappuccinos at Starbucks that cost more money than it's gonna cost to see us live. That's no joke.”
• [13:41] Krissy: “I guess I didn’t realize that ketamine was addictive.”
• [20:14] Bryan: “People age really quickly back then. Or we're aging really slowly.”
• [28:02] Robin: “We went to a nightclub called Harry Denton’s which is one of the classiest nightclubs in San Francisco.”
• [38:23] Bryan: “This guy sounds like a miserable prick who, you know, needs to find someone that lives up to his terribly high standards.”
• [52:12] Krissy: "Let's break this down for a second... They drive to the desert where there is a pool. She takes off her shirt. Then he's walking around trying to get into trouble, and then he decides to come over and give her a massage."
• [60:23] Bryan: “Don't buy from any scalpers who are trying to charge thousands of dollars for the Commercial Break tickets. You can get them pretty cheap...”

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Highlighted Segments with Timestamps

• Bennifer and Paparazzi: 00:21–02:47
• Concert ticket chat & wedge salad tangent: 03:04–09:51
• Michael Jackson/Matthew Perry/art vs. artist debate: 10:10–18:51
• Introduction to "Love Connection" nostalgia: 19:06–23:44
• Robin & Kurt trainwreck date ("Harry Denton's!"): 23:44–40:11
• Bob & Olinda skydive date: 41:14–58:23
• Show wrap-up and TCB Live promo: 58:23–end

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Overall Tone & Takeaways

• The hosts expertly walk the line between wry nostalgia and contemporary sensibility, especially in deconstructing Love Connection’s dated (often cringey) gender dynamics.
• Harry Denton’s comes alive as both a real and imagined monument to an earlier, sleazier, "classier" nightlife.
• “Love Connection” serves as endlessly fertile ground for riffing on social mores, TV history, and how time/age warps our view of the past.
• Bryan and Krissy’s chemistry shines as they volley one-liners, offer half-serious personal takes, and break down truly bizarre dating moments.
• The episode ends on a high-energy pitch for TCB’s upcoming live tour and with the classic sign-off:

  “Best to you, best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time—Chrissy and I always say, we do say and we must say…bye!”

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This episode of The Commercial Break is a prime slice of the show’s self-aware, pop culture-obsessed comedy. Whether you’re old enough to remember “Love Connection,” or just delight in the ridiculousness of retro dating norms (and present-day concert sticker shock), Bryan and Krissy’s banter makes for an endlessly entertaining, unpredictably insightful hour.

Skip the Crappuccinos and spend some time at (the much cheaper) TCB Live—just don’t expect the salad wedge to be full-sized or the hotel to be included!

Transcript

[Brian Green]

This is where the aliens is at. They think the aliens is up, them is down. Aliens is in the sea. The aliens are in the sea. Look at a crab in the face the next time you eating it. On this episode of the commercial break, we're gonna come on down to Harry Denton's, the classiest nightclub in all of San Francisco.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

We're at Harry Denton.

[Brian Green]

There will be no dropping of the beat, young lady. Here we play smooth jazz and smooth jazz only got cocaine use our cocaine. Glass straws available, spritzed and desanitized for your liking. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is a dear friend of mine and the co host of this silly show, Kristen Joy Odley. Best to you, Chris Best. Brian Best, you out there in the podcast universe. How are you? Thanks for joining us. Breaking news not at all. Breaking Ben Affleck and Bennifer. Bennifer is no longer Chrissy. And I know you're very sad about this. Yeah, I know this is. This rips the life from your cold dead heart. Yeah, I would normally.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Warning, yes.

[Brian Green]

I would normally not even mention Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, but I read a very interesting article where people said, people they, they said the people that they, the people, the people around them said that Jen and Ben almost immediately started having problems. Like as soon as they got married they all started falling apart and they stopped talking to each other and stopped hanging around and all this other stuff because Ben was surprised at all of the paparazzi attention that they were getting and he was looking to live more of a quiet life. Why did you marry Jennifer fucking Lopez? Yeah, no, she's never not going to be famous till the day that she dies. She will have paparazzi following her and probably you too, Ben. It's just the way that it is. And I like Ben. I think he's a very nice guy. At least he seems like it. Actually he doesn't seem like a nice guy. He seems like a guy like just a normal dude, right. Trying to make his way through life, you know, getting sober or deal dealing with his demons like all of us. And I like Jen seems perfectly pleasant. I don't think she's Jenny from the block. Don't think she has been for a while. But I do believe that it's kind of foolish to think that you're not going to have paparazzi.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, I can't believe that would have been a major point that he was thinking Was gonna happen.

[Brian Green]

No, no, no. So silliness, silliness abound Jen and Ben. What will we do, Chrissy? What will we do?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I don't know. I really am. I've been, you know, I've been crying in my pillow.

[Brian Green]

I know you have. Chrissy called me last night. She said, bennifer, I can't take it. Bennifer's no longer. And I said, it's okay, Chrissy. We still have the Green Day concert.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And then I parked right up, and.

[Brian Green]

Then Chrissy was like, thank God we have Green Day to look forward to. Love Green Day. Think they're great. I really do. I think a lot of their songs have just been transformative and great and that kind of like, post grunt. I mean, they were really. Came along along with grunge, but they were like, you know, punk rockers when punk rock wasn't all that popular at that moment. But I noticed that they're having some troubles selling concert tickets.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, they are?

[Brian Green]

I think so. Because, you know, you get those ticket master things on your Instagram and your Tik Toks and all that, you know, buy tickets now. Buy tickets now. Buy tickets now. And I always go to check and see how many tickets are actually being sold. I do. I'm so fascinated by it.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Mainly because I'm afraid of how few tickets we're going to sell to our own show.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Just asking you.

[Brian Green]

So I'm like, is the live event, you know, industry doing well or not doing well? Because there's mixed. There's mixed conversations going on right now. Some people saying that it's just a matter of how expensive everything is because everybody's out there trying to do live events, post pandemic. And then there's a lot of people who are saying, no, the industry is seeing a slump because things are so expensive and because everyone has shaken out all that need to go see concerts and spend money on this type of stuff. So they're being very particular about who they go see. And I just don't imagine that the commercial break is going to be at the top of anybody's list. I hope so.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

But hopefully we're in that price point. Oh, yeah. I mean, listen, cost prohibitive.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. There are some Frappuccinos at Starbucks that cost more money than it's gonna cost to see us live. That's no joke.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Unless you get the dinner and the tickets package.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, the dinner and tickets. Well, then it's two Frappuccinos. There you go. But it's like endless fish sticks or something. I don't know what it is. It's something.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

You'll enjoy it with half a wedge.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it'll be good.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And handheld something.

[Brian Green]

A handheld drink, like a. A free Styrofoam cup. I don't know.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I was asking Jeff. I'm like, what does the handheld mean? He's like, yeah, you know, I think it's things you can pick up. Oh, easily.

[Brian Green]

Like a little handheld appetizer.

[Olinda]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Okay.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Mozzarella sticks. I don't know.

[Brian Green]

Chicken tenders.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, chicken tenders.

[Brian Green]

Chicky tenders, as I call it, for the kids. You want some chicken tenders?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I like the fact that you get a half a wedge. At first I thought, well, half? Why half? But then I thought to myself, chrissy, have you ever eaten a whole wedge?

[Brian Green]

No.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And no, I have not. I would like a half.

[Brian Green]

There is no human. That's a whole wedge salad.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Half sounds good.

[Brian Green]

Well, if you give me enough bacon and dressing to get through the entire wedge. But it never works that way. There's enough to get through the very top leaf, and then you're done. And it's like, well, I don't want to eat just set lettuce. That's kind of boring. It is true. I'm waiting for the chef that says, just gob it there. Like 17, you know, strips of bacon, lots of blue cheese dressing, lots of Roquefort crumbles. And then we'll give them enough to get through the whole salad.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I'm gonna test this out. I think I'm gonna start. Ask half a wedge, extra dressing.

[Brian Green]

Yes. That's a good idea. There's a restaurant that I love here in town that's been around.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I love a good wedge.

[Brian Green]

I do, too. I just love a good wedge salad. But even at the restaurants where I worked where we served wedge salads, I always. There was no one ever finished them. Because that last quarter of a half a head of lettuce, the core is. There's no more dressing left. What are you going to do? I know there's nothing to do. So if a chef was smart. Actually, if a chef was smart, you just chop up the lettuce, make it like a regular. Like a regular salad, and then throw enough dressing in there to spread the whole thing.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Well, I think that is a thing. But there's something satisfying about cutting through the wedge.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. And, you know, it's all juicy and watery. It's just basically water. That's all it is. Yeah. I'm gonna have a glass of water with some blue cheese and Bacon. It's basically how I feel about it. But it is crisp and refreshing. And you go, wow. You know, nothing like a summer afternoon when you're all schizing out there with your sweaty, nasty self, and you walk into a restaurant, nice air conditioning, and they have a wedge salad, and you go, oh, that sounds refreshing. That's fatty bacon with creamy blue cheese dressing on it. Nothing says.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Nothing says a glass of Giant. That's a perfect lunch.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Or the buttery taste of a Chardonnay, if you will. Was that there's a Chardonnay out there with the name Butter in it?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, there is.

[Brian Green]

And I can't remember the name of.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

It, but I think it's just butter.

[Brian Green]

It's just butter. Butter Chardonnay. Okay, all right.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I think it might be butter.

[Brian Green]

It's something butter Chardonnay. And I'll tell you what, when I worked at that steak restaurant, we sold so many bottles of that, especially during the summer.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Green]

Because I think there's something about the word butter in a chardonnay that makes it sound like. And again, this is counterintuitive. You don't think of butter and summer, like, light and refreshing. Goes together just like wedge with creamy blue cheese, extra Roquefort and bacon. Doesn't sound refreshing, but it is. For some reason. It really is. And so there was a lot of butter nut Chardonnay being sold. Butter, but butter. But Chardonnay. Ah, yes. Straight from the assholes of the grapes in California. So anyway, I was looking and I. It looks like there are a lot of tickets available to our show. To our show for the Green Day tickets. And I would have thought Atlanta would have been a stronghold for Green Day, but not. But then again, every third day, there is some kind of 90s revival tour going on. The Smashing Pumpkins Alive.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I mean, they're all banding together and doing their. Their circuit.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, they're doing their circuit. And I think there's only so much that someone can regale us with the early 90s music that we're. I mean, I don't have tens of thousands of dollars to spend on these, and there's some of those bands that I just don't care if they got back together. You know what I'm saying?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Like live. Great album. Throwing Copper for you young people. Check it out. It's a. It's a band back from the 90s. Great album, throwing Copper. But I don't remember a single song that came after that. And I don't want to sit through, you know, all their new stuff to occasionally get a song from throwing Copper. I just don't want to pay a hundred dollars to go do that. And then I forget who's touring with them. But then you got Blink 182. And then, you know, the people who were growing up in the 80s, you got motley Crue, you got Guns N Roses, you got Poison, you got Rat. I mean, Rat. Who was asking for the Rat reunion? Honestly, it just goes on and on and on. It's deep and deep and deep. There's so many concerts, and especially when you live in a town like Atlanta, every day there's another big name, you know, either revival act or current act. And it's. It's too much. There's. I remember a lot to choose from.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Like when I was growing up, when I was a teenager, it was like there would be months with no big concerts. That way, when you had the big concert, you had to go to it. You knew who it was, you were waiting for it, you were anticipating it.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And it was a whole other game back then anyways. There wasn't music on demand.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's true. That's true.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

There wasn't all of that.

[Brian Green]

So, yeah, I'm waiting for that Chappelle Round to come in town, and then I'm gonna go. Yeah, I'll get crazy. I'll go get front seats, front row tickets, and the meet and greet. I'm gonna get the extra Rhone package. I'm gonna get the Roan Dome package.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

That's what I'm gonna do.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, she's really good, actually liking her shit. Yeah, I really am. You know, one of my kids is getting into Michael Jackson.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, okay.

[Brian Green]

And so this is a real dilemma for me because Michael does have some really good music. I mean, the guy, yeah, was a very talented musician. No matter what you think of his personal life. Take him just as a musician, as a creative force. He was a creative.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Separating the art from the person.

[Brian Green]

Separating the art from the person.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

But sometimes it's hard to do.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, sometimes you get. It gets the things that people say about them as a person gets so intense that it's hard to separate the music from the person, the creation from the person. And in this case, it is hard for me to do that. So my kids, for some reason, it was on some cartoon or some movie out there with a Michael Jackson song. And now my kids, a. One of them in particular, but a couple of them, they're really into Michael Jackson and they're asking a lot of questions about Michael Mainly, is it a boy or a girl? And I'm like, I. I don't. You know, it's kind. I don't know. Who's to say? I think it's a boy. Right. And that's the question they keep asking repeatedly, is it a boy or a girl? Because of the album covers. I don't think they know.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, okay.

[Brian Green]

But they're so young that, you know, there's just like. They just have these stereotypes in their mind about what someone looks like. But, you know, what do I say, Chrissy? What do I say about.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Is he a boy or a girl? Or about him as a. Oh, him as a person. I don't think you have to go too deep into it. But they're. I mean, if they're not asking the question, did he molest children? Then you don't have to go there.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, yeah. Or I could say he's a fiddle diddler and. Never proven in court. Never proven in court. But it is.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I can see your dilemma.

[Brian Green]

My dilemma is, you know, I don't know, I just feel.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Well, they're too. They're just too young to, like, delve into everything. As they get older, they can find out more. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Put me in the hot seat. And having to make a determination about whether I want my children listening to Michael Jackson or not. I'm like, how about some Huey Lewis in the news?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

The thing is, with Michael Jackson songs, I mean, they're so ingrained.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

So ingrained.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

In the fabric of everybody.

[Brian Green]

And listen, when you hear a song from Michael Jackson, you know, if you're at a party or a wedding or something like that, it's not like I stop and, like, protest the song. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, oh, that's a good one. You know, Billie Jean comes on.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I don't go, well, he was tickling that kid's anus one night while they were in pajammy jams up in his room. I don't do that. But at the same time, I don't know, it just feels. There's a little weirdness that goes on with there. You know what else is weird? Speaking of famous people who kind of had their personal life may have sometimes overshadowed their creativity. Was that Matthew Perry? Have you been reading about this? That is.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I mean, I've read up so far as to the Ketamine Queen being caught.

[Brian Green]

Insane. Yeah. That is insane.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Really crazy.

[Brian Green]

It is really insane. And now they're saying he was on quite the bender. Like, he. This assistant has now, I guess some of this stuff is coming out of the police interview. This assistant is saying that he was on quite the bender this has been going on.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

The bender of ketamine.

[Brian Green]

The bender of ketamine and potentially other stuff. There were.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I guess I didn't realize that ketamine was addictive.

[Brian Green]

I think when you're an addict, anything that makes you feel different, right? Anything. Anything that gets you out of your current anxiety or headspace can be addictive. And if it feels physically good, anything can be addictive, right? I mean, it feels good to eat, and a lot of people are addicted to eat. It gives you endorphins or whatever. But Matthew Perry was in a really bad way. And it makes me very sad to think that even the people who were around them were just like this kind of scuzzy.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, I saw that one was like, just like a drug dealer from the streets or something.

[Brian Green]

And a drug dealer from the streets. There's paramedic. Like a paramedic who was like.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

They were charging him $2,000 a file.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

What are the places that you go to when you're sick?

[Brian Green]

And urgent care.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Urgent care. It was an urgent care doctor.

[Brian Green]

Oh, he's. Yeah, he's going to jail for a long time. You can't be doing that, like, out the back. And then he called another one of his doctor friends because he realized he was prescribing way too much ketamine. People were going to catch on. So he called another doctor and started, you know, having him write prescriptions and then fill in the vials and all this other. It's just like, you know, I don't know. I'm not saying that drug dealing is the worst thing in the world. People have to make a living. There's lots of people that we know, famous and otherwise, that have at some point in their life been a trafficker of something that is legal, illegal. Right? Like you're a weed dealer. I don't think you should go. You're not going to go to hell. But when you're selling ketamine to someone who's not a trained medical professional and you understand that there could be very dangerous consequences to that, do you stop for one fucking second and think, this guy just bought 100 vials of ketamine from me last week. Do I need to give him another hundred vials?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And I think if you're already selling on the black market, you're not thinking that.

[Brian Green]

As a doctor, I think as.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

You cry, I mean, you. If you first cross the threshold of going into something that's technically illegal, then, yeah, you're probably just in it for the money, right?

[Brian Green]

No, I'm asking a question as, like, as a human being. So if you are.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, you mean just like, just a human being, not, like, doing something wrong.

[Brian Green]

Just doing something wrong. Like, do you have no scruples? Do you have no morals? Do you question nothing at all? You just say, oh, yeah, no problem. I'll give you another hundred vials knowing that you just went through 100 vials in a week. In a week. Dude, slow down. You're going to kill yourself. Like, I don't know. I understand what you're saying.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

D just keeps delivering.

[Brian Green]

D delivered to me all the time, but I never asked him for 10 pounds of cocaine and then asked him for another 10 pounds of cocaine. You know what I'm saying? Well, maybe I did a couple of times. But listen, that's my. Very few people die of cocaine, right? I don't know. I just think to myself for a second, like, he's a doctor. He took a hit.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, the doctor part of it makes it.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Worse.

[Brian Green]

That's crazy. It really is just, to me, like, insane. You don't think for. You know who you're selling to because you've met him in person. You know you're selling to. You know, he's in a bad way. Three weeks before his death, the. The assistant had seen him go into some kind of, like, convulsions or something and just froze up.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

He was like, yeah, a seizure.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, like a seizure. That was really scary. And the doctor saw him, like, had to see him or whatever. And the doctor was like, you have to slow down, but here's another 10 vials of ketamine. Like, it's just insane to me. Don't. Don't up while you're up, okay? Matthew wants to buy some ketamine. Okay? Have him come into the office, check him out, take his blood pressure or something like that. You know what I'm saying? Do something. It's just crazy. And it's not that I have some super affinity to Matthew Perry. I don't. I saw friends like everybody else. Congratulations, great show. But when you know someone is in a terrible, terrible way, like, is the 2000 extra dollars really going to change your life? You're already an urgent care doctor. You probably make a pretty good living for yourself. Just.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, I don't think so. I mean.

[Brian Green]

Oh, man, Chrissy.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Somebody with just no conscience.

[Brian Green]

No. None whatsoever. Well, we know that because he texted the. Whoever he texted the ketamine queen or whatever. How much will this moron pay? How much will this moron pay? I hope that doctor goes to jail for a long time. I really do.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I do, too.

[Brian Green]

Because usually I'm not like, I'm not one for the war on drugs. I think it's just a silly, dumb, stupid thing. But this is a clear cut case of no conscience and just willing to do anything for the next buck, despite how anybody, how anybody may be affected. And that part, to me, I guess, is the part that feels sad. And I just. I don't know, I wish that some. I wish he had just thought about it for a second because then maybe, maybe the problem.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

The problem, the, the even the, the sad. The other sad part of that is that if he didn't do it, somebody else probably would have. Yeah, that's what I found. Somebody else.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's true. You know? Yeah, I mean, I do know that too, but what am I talking about? Who cares at the end of the day? I mean, I like Matthew Perry, but I guess you're right. He was going to kill himself regardless, you know what I'm saying? You can't stop somebody from themselves.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

At the end of the day. Speaking of love and joy and happiness, it's Friday and I'm. And I. It's been a while since we have done a Love Connection video.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I'm so excited. I really am. I love.

[Brian Green]

I love the Love Connection too. And you know, I just. We shook it out for a while. We had like, you know, five, six episodes on Love Connection in season number three. I think it was a couple in season number four. Four.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And what season are we in now?

[Brian Green]

I think we're in 20. Season 32. I don't know. I don't know. Matthew Perry's doctor keeps on giving me ketamine. I'm not really sure. He says, no problem, we're on season five.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

That's what I thought.

[Brian Green]

So we're on season number five. We're in year number five of this shit. No, year number four of the year number four. We're in year number four this season number five. And so we kind of overdid it. Season three. Even though I thought it was very funny. Every time we did it, I know four. I sprinkled them in and then we had. I don't think we've done one in season number five. Could be wrong, but I don't believe we've done one of these in a long time.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

It's been a while.

[Brian Green]

Love Connection, the old dating show from the 80s and 90s, Chuck Woolery. What the. Chuck, We've met so many great personalities on. On the love. Watching these old love connection videos.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Like, how many people that look way older than they are?

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah, that's where we. Chrissy and I determined that people age really quickly back then. Or we're aging really slowly. One of the two we met Brad Grundle. Scundle. Remember we did Brad Gunderson, that douchebag. So I felt like it came up on my algorithm the other day, and I said, we. We got to do at least one. We got to do at least one in season.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, we got to throw one in there.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. So let's do this. Let's take a break, and when we come back, we'll review a couple. I got two of them for you. A couple?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Two and two.

[Brian Green]

Two and two. We're going to do two and two today. Let's review a couple of love connection videos. We'll be back.

[Announcer]

Okay, you guys, I have an idea. Why don't we take a break? Gotcha.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

This is the break.

[Announcer]

And you already know when you hear my sexy voice, it's time to whip your phone out and follow us on Instagram or skip the ads at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCV podcast. And of course, you know, if you want to get involved, you can always give us a call or text us at 212-4333, TCB. That is 212-433-3822. And guess what? I finally have information on TCB Live. So the links are in the show notes. But let me tell you right now, you can come see us at Daniel beach improv on Tuesday, September 24, or at the Funny Bone Orlando on Wednesday, September 25. It's gonna be fab. So go buy your tickets and we'll see you in Florida.

[Brian Green]

All right. You know it. You love it. The love connection. And there may be some people listening to this show. I imagine a chunk of the audience listening to the show who has no idea what the love connection is. Back before Flinder and Tinder and lonely fans and all this a bumble stumble and all this other shit that you're probably having a hard time finding love. There were actual games on TV like. Like dating games on TV where people would get connected. Now, here's the most amazing thing about this. We've said this a lot, so I'll be short about this. This love connection. Chuck Woolery, who's the host, would bring a man or a woman out on stage. Then they would have three choices to pick from. They'd have a little couple of videos that they would watch and they choose who they wanted to go on a blind date with. Then they would give them their physical address and they would go pick them up from that physical address. Can you imagine doing this in 2024? It would be liability central. So I'm just letting you know that this is so dated. I mean, it's so dated. And so is a lot of the language they use and all this other stuff, but we find it so funny. What the fuck? Chuck was the very first video of Connections video that we did. And we're super excited now to bring you more Love Connection here on the commercial break. Let's start with. I don't know, we should start with here, Chrissy, though. I got two of them.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, this guy looks interesting.

[Brian Green]

Let's start with this guy. And there they like. I also wanted to let you know, there often times in the Love connection, which are 30 minute episodes, they would do one full dating cycle. Like a guy, a girl would come out, they would choose, then they would bring him on stage, they would talk about the date that they went through, and then they would decide whether or not they wanted to go on a second date. And then they would introduce you to the next person. But you'd have to wait until the following episode to hear about the date. So sometimes you kind of. It's like a little. You'll see the person and then they come back the next episode. This is, I think is one of those. Oh, I should actually turn the volume.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

So we can hear it. Why not?

[Kurt]

Started out by me giving her a phone call. And I guess I realized pretty quickly we weren't going to have anything in common. Well, I mean, I like women who are deep. And she just didn't seem like a deep kind of person. She seemed more like the kind of, you know, woman who probably knows all the colors of lipstick, but couldn't tell you who the Vice President of the United States was.

[Chuck Woolery]

Whoa.

[Brian Green]

Getting right into it here. I think it's the next video. He is coming out strong. So what we're seeing is a guy who is wearing a brown blazer with a Hawaiian shirt on under it. He's wearing what I'm sure is lipstick. And he's.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I think you've got makeup on.

[Brian Green]

He's got makeup on. And his hair starts halfway back on his head. A half moon and it's curly. Yeah.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, what's your side of this phone conversation, Robin?

[Robin]

Well, I thought he had a monotone voice.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, she's supposed to say, like. I mean, she's not gonna be like. But, oh, I loved him.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. He was so cute. I just thought he was the sweetest thing.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

From the moment she comes, guns blazing.

[Brian Green]

By the way, Chuck asked him, what's your first impression of her? And he says, well, I like women that are deep. Is that your first impression? Did you have to wait a couple dates to get that? I mean, honestly.

[Chuck Woolery]

Yeah.

[Robin]

Sounded very boring. And that's how he turned out to be.

[Brian Green]

Get him, girl.

[Kurt]

Okay. She's kind of half living in San Francisco, half living in San Diego right now. And I'm in San Diego, so.

[Brian Green]

You'Ll.

[Kurt]

Have to ask her about that. But she suggested I come up to San Francisco for the weekend. You know, at least.

[Brian Green]

San Francisco for the weekend. Chrissy?

[Olinda]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

You want to come up here for the weekend?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Hey, I don't know.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Stay at my place.

[Brian Green]

I don't like you. You're not very interesting. I find you boring. Would you like to come up for the weekend? Stay at my house?

[Kurt]

The trip will be.

[Chuck Woolery]

So you arrive at the airport. Is she there to meet you?

[Kurt]

She's there to pick me up.

[Chuck Woolery]

What was your first impression of her?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I can't imagine.

[Brian Green]

I cannot imagine. I cannot imagine making a B.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Somebody from the airport I just spoke with on the phone.

[Brian Green]

Imagine meeting someone on Bumble and then saying, come on down for the week.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Stay the weekend.

[Brian Green]

Of course I have done this, but.

[Kurt]

I can't imagine a little disappointed in her video. You know, she looked cute, but she was. She looked a little bit older in person than her real age.

[Chuck Woolery]

She did.

[Kurt]

She did have a good body, though. I will give her credit for that.

[Brian Green]

Oh, do give her credit for the good body. What a chauvinist pig. Yeah, she looked a little older. You all look a little bit older. I just gotta let you know. What are you, 22? You look like you're 47.

[Kurt]

Though I really do have to say, you know, it's a shame she doesn't work out a little less in her body and a little more on her mind.

[Brian Green]

What a dick.

[Robin]

Yeah, you don't deserve to know my mind. You.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

You're stuck now for a grand weekend.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I love the women. I love the women in the audience. They're going crazy. Wow.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, Robin, what did you think when I saw him?

[Robin]

Oh, I thought he was so fine and he was just gorgeous. The man of my dreams.

[Brian Green]

Not. Oh, snap. That was a bad burn back in early 1990. Yeah. That biting sarcasm.

[Chuck Woolery]

So here you are in the airport and you're deciding to do what?

[Kurt]

Well, she had already kind of planned out the whole date.

[Chuck Woolery]

She had? Oh, that was nice.

[Kurt]

And step number one, were you appreciative.

[Chuck Woolery]

Of that or were you you still kind of thinking oh I wish I.

[Robin]

Was out with this your hotel too.

[Chuck Woolery]

What did you say?

[Robin]

I said tell him who paid for your hotel.

[Kurt]

Robin paid for the hotel. I will give her credit for that.

[Brian Green]

What do you mean? Well, you're giving her credit for her body and for her credit card.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

What in the. Dude, if you're going to come up there, you got to pay for your own hotel. Can you imagine? I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't understand.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

At least there was a hotel involved.

[Brian Green]

Though I have to say you're right about that. Yeah, by the hour.

[Chuck Woolery]

She paid for your hotel?

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chuck Woolery]

Excuse me just a minute.

[Brian Green]

Why?

[Robin]

Oh, I just thought I.

[Brian Green]

Next to.

[Robin]

We went to a nightclub called Harry Dentons which is one of the classiest nightclubs in San Francisco. And there's.

[Brian Green]

Oh good old, good old Harry Dentons. We're gonna come on down to Harry Dentons the classiest nightclub in all of San Francisco. There will be no dropping of the beat, young lady. Here we play smooth jazz and smooth jazz only got cocaine use our cocaine room glass straws available spritzed and desanitized for your liking.

[Robin]

Tell attached to it.

[Brian Green]

Wait, Harry Dentons has a hotel attached to it? I want to go to Harry Denton. Why don't we have a Harry Dentons here? Is this kind of like in Panama City where Club La Villa was connected to the Holiday Inn?

[Robin]

Yeah, to it. I thought it would really nice experience and gee manito, I mean I can't.

[Chuck Woolery]

Believe that you you weren't more than just giving her credit that you weren't really impressed and appreciative of that.

[Kurt]

No, I was appreciative and I thought that was very nice.

[Robin]

Thank you.

[Brian Green]

Where are the manners? Is everybody else who out there who has kids teaching their children manners? I just want to know this because I beat it into my kids heads. Please and thank you. Please and thank you. Open the door, hold the door, do the things you know.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Robin]

When he called me, when he called me from the hotel he build it to the room on my credit card.

[Kurt]

I did, I called.

[Brian Green]

Oh I did not. I did not. I probably did but I didn't realize it. I also had some champagne and a Latin gay lover. I also build that to your credit card phone in the room.

[Kurt]

I did not Ask to bill it to the credit card.

[Robin]

Used your credit card from the room, didn't you? Yeah. Your calling card.

[Kurt]

Don't you have told me to call you from the room the next.

[Brian Green]

Next morning?

[Robin]

Did I say to bill it to me?

[Brian Green]

Okay, now I think we're splitting hairs a little bit. You put the credit card down for the hotel room, it's going to get billed to the credit card. Yeah.

[Kurt]

You think about.

[Brian Green]

Can you. Can you imagine going down. Yes.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

A calling card calling. You've got a calling card.

[Brian Green]

Oh, what, am I selling marijuana on my pager? The calling card.

[Kurt]

I just used the phone that was in the room. I'd be glad to pay you back for the phone call.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

We're getting hostile now, but what do you expect when you come out out with honestly, guns blazing?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. You come out and you call someone not deep and you know, they could work on their mind and they're not their body. And I mean when you do that, you're setting yourself up for confrontation. I mean, I also understand this is a television show and the reason probably why it was so popular is because people got to see the train wreck, like all the drama and all that stuff. But let's, let's take for assume for a second that Chuck Woolery is gone, that you know what, the Chuck is somewhere else. And if this is like real life and you're having this conversation with a friend of yours, you're being. You're trying to be somewhat considerate. Yeah, she's not my style. She's not my type. She's very nice. She paid for the hotel room. We had an okay time. Yeah. Probably not a second date. Like just be a little bit congenial.

[Chuck Woolery]

Left and went straight to the air or straight to the hotel and then to the, to the club.

[Kurt]

No, we actually went out to dinner. She had picked the restaurant. She seemed fascinated by the fact that. That this restaurant had light fixtures that looked like breasts.

[Robin]

That was why you wanted to go.

[Brian Green]

No, no, no.

[Kurt]

You suggested the rest.

[Brian Green]

No, no, no, no. You suggested girly. You suggested. Don't you try to get this on me. You suggested the tits and the lamps. I wanted to see phallus, big penises. That's what I was interested in. I told you from the beginning I wear lipstick, give good blowjob, drawn.

[Kurt]

You told me it had light fixes that looked like breasts and you seemed to think that was a good idea. But the bottom line is the light fixtures didn't look like breast, so it really doesn't.

[Brian Green]

The bottom line was the French onion soup was delicious.

[Robin]

And you were disappointed.

[Kurt]

Sorry, Cho.

[Robin]

Now, what happened after a restaurant, very good food.

[Chuck Woolery]

Did you enjoy the food in the restaurant?

[Kurt]

Oh, the. The food was good. You know, conversation went nowhere. We had nothing in common. But the food was good.

[Robin]

Thank God I don't have anything in common with you.

[Brian Green]

Snap. People are going to church because she's standing up for herself. And you got to remember this is like 1988 or 1999, and attitudes were completely different back then. I love it. I love this. So.

[Chuck Woolery]

So what happened after.

[Kurt]

After dinner, for some reason, she decided to take me to a wedding reception. I don't know. Maybe she felt like we weren't gonna go. You asked me if I wanted to go by saying yes.

[Robin]

If you wanted to see Treasure island, we could stop by.

[Brian Green]

It's.

[Kurt]

There's nothing on Treasure island to see. It's a military base.

[Brian Green]

Why are you going to a wedding on a military base? Do you know the people? And by the way, Brad Grundenberg also took his date to a wedding, too.

[Kurt]

Yeah, you asked me to go to the wedding reception. I tried to be polite by agreeing, but then you showed me off like an animal in a zoo, introducing me to each table.

[Announcer]

I didn't show you off.

[Kurt]

Hi, this is Kurt, my love connection date. Hi, this is Kurt, my love connection date.

[Brian Green]

What did you want her to say? What were you expecting? Hi, this is Kurt, my long lost cousin. Hi, this is Kurt. We met on the. I. I don't know. I don't know. Just chat line. 1-800-Chat. I don't know, Robin.

[Chuck Woolery]

I mean, you know, it was.

[Brian Green]

It was.

[Robin]

It's true. Part of it's true. I was not showing him off. I was making sure everyone knew that I didn't choose this gu.

[Brian Green]

I want audience shots.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I know sometimes they do show the audience sometimes. Yeah.

[Chuck Woolery]

You know, I gotta. I gotta tell you something, Kurt.

[Brian Green]

As. As.

[Chuck Woolery]

As unsophisticated or unintelligent as you think this woman is, she seems to have a razor edge to her mind.

[Kurt]

She chose not to use it on the date. Well, we went to a bar.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Something must have been going right, though, at the same time for them to go, like to the club or to the dinner than the club, then the reception.

[Brian Green]

I mean, here's the question.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I mean, if I'm her, I'm like, I'm not feeling well.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, well, it's 2024 when it's perfectly acceptable to ghost people. But here's the question. If you go out on a date, we actually had someone Wrote in with this question. What's doing? Ask TCB soon. Someone actually wrote in with this question. If you go out on a date, like you're talking on the phone or you're connecting via, you know, DMS or ims or whatever, you know, I don't even know what they call it anymore. Messaging, whatever it is, and you connect a little bit. You've had a couple of interactions and you feel like it's. Now it's time to meet somebody in person and you make a plan. Like, let's go to, I don't know, Six Flags, and then we're gonna go out to dinner, and then we're gonna go to this bar that my friend owns. Well, yeah, I'm, you know, I'm pretending like we're 18. Okay. So you, you, you just. And then you pick somebody up and right off the get, it's not. You're not connecting like you were offline in real life. What do you do?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

That's where I was trying to say I'm not. I wasn't saying ghost them. I would say I'm not feeling well.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, well, that's ghosting them. You're just making an excuse for. Oh, it's not totally ghosting them. It's not like going to the bathroom and not showing back up and leaving Marlin with the bill.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. But that's a really tough position to.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Be, not feeling well. I'm so sorry. Like, like, you know, it's just the way it is.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I say, my vasectomy's acting up. Yeah, that's what I say. I tell that to ask her all the time. My vasectomy is acting up. I'll see you at home.

[Kurt]

A very low cut dress. She did ask me if she should wear a sexy dress, and I said yes. But this was really low cut. I would say inappropriately. So all the other people in the bar were very classily dressed, as she says. It was a classic classy bar. And so all the male eyes I noticed were on one place and it wasn't on, you know, her face.

[Robin]

It was a very.

[Brian Green]

Well, what are you complaining about, dude? She's wearing a low. You asked her to wear a sexy dress, and then she wears a sexy dress, and then you're worried about other people looking at her. That is the highest compliment anyone can pay to your date is if there's. If they're looking or looking them up or down, male or female, which I get a lot. And Astro gets irritated.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I walk into a room, I float on My. My silver starred penis into a room.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Heads turn.

[Brian Green]

Heads do turn, Chrissy. For all the right reasons, let me tell you. Is that. That does the commercial break. I can't believe he's at another PTA meeting. He shouldn't show his face in public.

[Robin]

Very classy dress.

[Brian Green]

It.

[Robin]

It was not low cut. It was just.

[Kurt]

There was a lot hanging out there, Robin.

[Chuck Woolery]

Oh, how did this date end?

[Kurt]

Oh, well, you know, it was going nowhere. So, you know, the hotel.

[Chuck Woolery]

No kidding.

[Kurt]

The hotel was right next to the bar. So, you know, I went up, went to bed, and, you know, she came and picked me up and took me to the airport the next day. And that's really all there was.

[Brian Green]

Well, it also sounds like you're Mr. Fantastically Exciting, like you're not excited about anything that's going on. She takes you to the restaurant with tits. You're not exciting. She meets you at, you know, she. You're talking to her on the phone.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

She's not the deepest person. She arranges, picks up from the airport.

[Brian Green]

You use her credit card to call somebody. I mean, you're not. There are some people on this earth, I think, that are not pleased with anything, no matter what it is. Like, there's not one good thing that he said about her in this entire thing, except for, I will give her credit, she paid for my hotel room. That's not a. That's not like an attribution of a human being. That's someone just being kind and saying, let me pay for it. I'll get it. And, you know, by the way, in 1988, that's particularly forward. I think this. This woman sounds perfectly lovely. She does, I would find. At least for me. And I think you're this way too. I find something interesting about almost everything that I do. Right. And mainly for entertainment on the show. But yeah, but I do. It's just the way my mind works. Like everything's funny or there's something interesting or someone has something interesting about them. This guy sounds like a miserable prick who, you know, needs to find someone that lives up to his terribly high standards.

[Robin]

Well, there was a little bit more. Well, if I have to describe Kurt, the one word I could not use would be gentleman. He was a slob. He threw away a yogurt container in my car. He stuffed it in between the door and the seat, and it got yogurt.

[Bob]

All over the place.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

How did a yogurt container. Container get mixed into this whole thing?

[Brian Green]

And why are you choosing to eat yogurt in someone's car? On a date? What are you doing? Astrid does this all the time. But we've been married for a decade. What's going on?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Like on the go with 30 children?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, of course. Yeah. You're gonna.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I mean, this is how. I have no idea how. Hopefully Chuck asks. Does he ask, where did the yogurt come from?

[Brian Green]

Where did the yogurt come from?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Because you don't just keep yogurt in your car.

[Brian Green]

No, you don't.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

So it had to have been.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's something you get at the Holiday Inn Express. It's one of those gogurts or something. I got a gogurt. Mind if I eat it?

[Kurt]

Robin, I spent more than 200 on that trip. That's a lot more than you spent, so I wouldn't complain.

[Robin]

I had to get myself down there, too.

[Chuck Woolery]

I. I gotta get out of this.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, get out. Pull the rip cord.

[Brian Green]

Chuck always pulls the ripcord. That's why we said. What the. Chuck, you don't ask any follow up questions. That's. You're the worst, Chuck. I mean, you're the best, but you're the worst. And you were the best, and now you're the worst. I mean, there's a whole thing going on with you I don't understand.

[Chuck Woolery]

Yeah, got you. Let's see the audience pick. This was a disaster.

[Brian Green]

Oh.

[Chuck Woolery]

They thought you made the right choice. They like Robin.

[Kurt]

Well, they were sure wrong, Chuck.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, Robin, G, I. You know, you've come all the way down here from San Francisco and spent more money. I certainly appreciate you coming on the show. You seem like a nice person to me.

[Robin]

Thank you. I had a great time. I loved it.

[Chuck Woolery]

Sorry we didn't make a love connection for you.

[Brian Green]

Okay, sure.

[Chuck Woolery]

Like to see you under different circumstances.

[Brian Green]

Over. Thank you. Like to be back. Yeah, get Robin another day. For God's sakes, Chuck, let's do something for Robin. She had to deal with Mr. Stodgy Ass over here. All right, let's take a break and then we'll do more Love Connection when we come back.

[Announcer]

Hello, my fans. I mean, Brian and Chrissy's fans. Boy, have I got news for you. We are officially coming to Florida for TCB Live. That's right. You can come see Brian's bald head shining under the stage lights at Dania Beach Improv, Tuesday, September 24, and at the Funny Bone in Orlando on Wednesday, September 25. If you can't make it to see us in person, text us or call us at 212-4333, TCB and leave us a little love note instead. As always, please, please, please follow us on Instagram hecommercial break and on tiktokcbpodcast. Our content is shot link good. So get after it. And you already know I put every single one of those links in the show notes. You're welcome.

[Brian Green]

All right, and we're back. We're having fun with Chuck Woolery here on the Love connection. I've got another video for you. Let's check it out. And I'm gonna skip through the video calibration here.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Green]

Oh, this guy's a total drive. It's.

[Bob]

Well, you know, it's like women drivers. Now, I don't think all women are bad drivers, but some are. You'll be on. You'll be on the road and you look over and you'll look at a girl and her head's bopping up and down like, you know, the blinders on. No reason at all.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

They're, you know, they're just enjoying themselves.

[Brian Green]

Just having some fun. You'll be riding down the road. You know what I'm saying, Chuck? And then someone will be smiling, you know, if you just want to. Gonna grab them by the neck, smash their heads onto the steering wheel, chop them up, put them in a freezer and bury them in your backyard. You know what I'm saying, Chuck?

[Bob]

Her car will be sticking out in the road. Some guy will, come on, hit the car.

[Brian Green]

I see this all the time. I see this every day. Some bimbo's got a back end of a car sticking out. Some other dude hits it. She's smiling, he's bobbing.

[Bob]

Ticket the girl walk away, Scott clean. But if she head wasn't bobbing up and down, down.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And she'll walk away, Scott claimed, obviously.

[Brian Green]

Have you ever seen this?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, exactly.

[Brian Green]

Under what circumstances are. What roads are you traveling? That's what I want to know.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

He. He just stopped and watched the whole thing happen.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God, this guy's a douche.

[Chuck Woolery]

But, you know, in all fairness, don't you think some men are like that as well?

[Bob]

Absolutely.

[Chuck Woolery]

Oh, okay.

[Brian Green]

So they're usually gay, Chuck. Gay completely.

[Bob]

But no, I'm not completely biased, but I'm mostly biased.

[Brian Green]

I'm about 99. Sure.

[Chuck Woolery]

Now, you say a lot of women find you arrogant. What exactly do you mean by that?

[Bob]

Yeah, I can't imagine confidence in myself and my abilities. And it's, you know, take it. Take. Take it or leave it.

[Chuck Woolery]

You are what you are.

[Bob]

If they like it, then that's fine. If they walk away Then no, I don't take it personally.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, anyway, going to show you the women.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

He's gonna make some girl a happy woman.

[Brian Green]

I, I want to see how many divorces he's had since 1990.

[Chuck Woolery]

Be forget you're going to pick the woman that you think's best for him.

[Brian Green]

Here we go.

[Chuck Woolery]

First, suanne, she never kisses on a first date. She will kiss on a second date unless it's a lunch date. Now she doesn't.

[Brian Green]

What? That's a very specific rule. I'll kiss on the second date, but not a lunch date. It's too early in the daytime.

[Chuck Woolery]

Mind paying when she goes out and she thinks that some men talk too much. Here's an example of that. I guess.

[Brian Green]

They have to fill it up with, with, with unnecessary conversation. Like there can't be silence. They're not comfortable with just not saying anything. Okay. We're having a good time. Sounds like an episode of the commercial break. You can just be quiet for a few minutes.

[Chuck Woolery]

And next, Tina, her favorite opening line is, hi, I'm Tina. How do you like me so far? She says that she.

[Brian Green]

That's actually a good one. I like that. I'm going to use that. Parent teacher conference meets a lot of.

[Chuck Woolery]

Men at the gym. And unlike Suanne, Tina refuses to ever pay for a date. And here's why.

[Brian Green]

What was that? Why is there a moaner?

[Olinda]

I think it's important that a date pays for me. I mean, I could not imagine paying for a date simply because I think that shows that whether or not they're capable of providing for you 10 years down the line when you have three kids.

[Announcer]

What?

[Brian Green]

Wow. Okay. Just goes to show you, not all, it's not all men that have backwards thinking.

[Chuck Woolery]

Finally, Olinda Olina moved here a month ago from Seattle. She claims that she won't date a man with a, with a mustache or bad teeth. Now she recently spotted a great looking man at a club. And here's how she got his attention.

[Olinda]

As he was making his way through this narrow.

[Brian Green]

How old did it say she was? 27. Jeez. Wow. She looks like Chelsea Handler. How old is Chelsea handler? In her 50s.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I think she is 50.

[Brian Green]

Chelsea looks great.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

She looks amazing.

[Olinda]

He was making his way through this narrow aisleway that I was sitting on. I just stuck my foot out and tripped him and he didn't fall all the way down, but he stood up and. Or he straightened himself out and we all started talking and we decided that was a really good way to meet guys. So I've tried to change that now.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

But that's led me to be on this dating show.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

It worked out so well.

[Brian Green]

And now I cause every third guy I meet to go to the emergency room with a broken skull.

[Chuck Woolery]

All the way down. But he had big knot on his shin. Okay, those are the three women Bob had to choose from. Time for you to vote. Make your choice now.

[Brian Green]

By the way, have you ever seen the movie in the Incredibles? The Pixar movie? The Incredibles?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Okay, this guy looks like the father from that. He's got this huge chin. It's sticking way out.

[Chuck Woolery]

Who would you say?

[Brian Green]

3. 3. I know what's best for everybody.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Hey, here's where it shows the audience. And they're choosing like they're picking the.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, the old. Pick a meter that they have in front of them.

[Chuck Woolery]

We're gonna take a break. When we come back, we'll meet the woman that Bob selected here. Everything that happened on their date. Two and two. Be right back.

[Brian Green]

That's simply the best thing ever.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

It really is.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. There's commercials in here, so I'm just gonna speed for.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Oh, a commercial for a Ouija board.

[Brian Green]

A Ouija board. Because, you know, I guess. And then a turkey cake. Oh, and then. Have you been hurt? Lawyers Medical Arts Training Center. Oh, presto. What's presto? Oh, oh, I think this is just a commercial. Oh, Kmart. And then you go to Walmart. Kids R Us. There's so many good commercials in the 80s.

[Chuck Woolery]

All right, we're back. Bob's going to tell us who he picked.

[Bob]

Well, I chose a Linda.

[Chuck Woolery]

Haven't seen each other since the date. We always hear both sides say hello to Linda Brown.

[Brian Green]

Hi, Linda. Oh, they had a good date. He wink. He winkled at her.

[Olinda]

Yeah, he.

[Brian Green]

He tinkled on her.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

He gave the finger. The finger Tingle.

[Brian Green]

Twinkly fingers. Who does that? The twinkly fingers. I do that to my children.

[Chuck Woolery]

Says hi. Mix up at home.

[Brian Green]

Back.

[Bob]

Back there.

[Chuck Woolery]

And Bob will start us off.

[Bob]

Well, I called Olinda up, spoke to her sister. Her sister was a little short with me, but a little short. A little short. She was a little rude, but a little rude.

[Brian Green]

But I punched her in the face when I got to the house. So I felt much better about everything.

[Bob]

I called. I didn't even leave a message. I called back and actually I left a message saying, hey, this is our love.

[Brian Green]

I didn't even have a message, but I called back and left a message.

[Chuck Woolery]

Did your sister form an impression about Bob? I mean, she tell you? I talked to this Guy. And boy, was he.

[Olinda]

Yes, she formed an impression. She called me up at work and said, olinda, you have been chosen by the biggest jerk in history. She felt really sorry for me, Chuck.

[Chuck Woolery]

Oh, did you agree with that?

[Olinda]

Well, the first time I spoke to him, I already had this in my mind. And he got on the phone and he said, hey, hope you don't have any hangups. You know, get my drift? He's like doing all this stuff and I thought that. I just thought, oh, my.

[Brian Green]

Hope you don't have any hangers. Get my drip. God, that sounds like the kids today. Give it a little dibble. God.

[Olinda]

So, yes, I did have a really impressible. That was real depressed.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, phone is not your strong suit. We find that out. So now what happened?

[Bob]

Well, I went over. We decided to go skydiving.

[Chuck Woolery]

Go skydiving?

[Brian Green]

Right. Skydiving?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

On your first date. Wow. Pulling out the big balls there. Skydiving. That's skydiving. I mean, it's an adventure.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Meet me at the airport. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

You want to get together? Meet me at the airport. No, not that one. The one in the field with the 30 year old plane. I'm gonna jump out the back of it.

[Chuck Woolery]

And now. Have you ever done this before, Linda?

[Olinda]

No, I never have at all.

[Chuck Woolery]

So just a first date on Love Connection.

[Brian Green]

Great.

[Chuck Woolery]

Let's go. I mean, that's kind of.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Chuck can't believe it. I can't believe it either too. And by the way, what do you talk about when you fear for your. And your fear for your life? How are you getting to know somebody?

[Chuck Woolery]

I assume he came to your place. Did he? Did you. Did you form a different impression?

[Olinda]

Yes. I was walking down the stairs and he had his back to me. And then he turned around and he described himself as, you know, in the worst way. Possibly because he turned around and he looked great. He had big blue eyes and he was smiling like a nice, normal, happy guy. So I thought, okay, maybe this can work.

[Brian Green]

And I. I don't know what you're seeing. I'm seeing like mass murderer vibes from this guy.

[Olinda]

I don't know, looking forward to the skydiving. So my spirits went up.

[Chuck Woolery]

What'd you think of her when you saw her?

[Bob]

Oh, she looked great. Pretty eyes, pretty hair.

[Chuck Woolery]

What have you seen her in a parachute?

[Brian Green]

Oh, absolutely. Exactly what I was thinking. Chuck. Wait, I see her wrapped up in a parachute in my trunk.

[Chuck Woolery]

Bunk, you're going.

[Bob]

So we drove on out to the desert. That's where they do the skydiving.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And she. You know, the whole way they do.

[Chuck Woolery]

It over the ocean, they just give.

[Bob]

You a second chance over la. But I got out.

[Chuck Woolery]

You get to the airport, I guess, right?

[Bob]

And, you know, you don't get there and jump right on the plane and jump out. There's a lot of time where you just sit and do nothing. Oh, so for like, three hours.

[Brian Green]

Lucky.

[Chuck Woolery]

You had a date, right?

[Bob]

Yeah, we had.

[Chuck Woolery]

They had.

[Brian Green]

I'm having a hard time getting. Connecting on a human level with you, Chuck, out there.

[Bob]

So we actually sat around the pool. We sat around the pool and she took her shirt off and.

[Brian Green]

Oh, hey now. All right, this is getting spicy. I like this.

[Chuck Woolery]

Well, now, you made it sound like she. You made it sound like she took her shirt off and there's nothing underneath.

[Brian Green]

Come on.

[Bob]

She had, like, a little top.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chuck Woolery]

What a. Linda.

[Brian Green]

What?

[Olinda]

I had a. I had a top on, a tank top, and I had a sweater, a cardigan over it. It was 110 degrees, so I was wearing shorts and I had this little tank top on and I took my cardigan off.

[Bob]

It was a little Chuck. It was little talk.

[Brian Green]

It was little Chuck. Let me describe it. Nipples hanging out everywhere. Oh, Chuck, if you could have seen. Excuse me or Linda, we're talking for a second. The men are talking. Oh, Chuck. I had a man. Johnson, the size of the desert sky.

[Bob]

Right, but.

[Chuck Woolery]

So you're sitting around the pool and.

[Bob]

And personal.

[Chuck Woolery]

I heard you cough back there. Linda, he didn't mean you had a little top. He meant that the top was little.

[Olinda]

Right, Right.

[Chuck Woolery]

There may be no good way out of this.

[Brian Green]

You know what I mean?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

John's hair looks like the Wolf Man.

[Brian Green]

I know. His hair is so done. It's sticking up a foot above his head.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Head of the side.

[Brian Green]

I know. And it's got like this. I don't know, like this porcupine look to it in the back.

[Bob]

I was sitting there and her back was to me. Because, you know, I was wandering around, you know, trying to get into trouble.

[Chuck Woolery]

Trying to see your top.

[Bob]

And so I saw her sitting there and I walked over to her. I put my hands on her back and I just felt her just melt.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it felt so good. It was the best thing since my last murder. Chuck, you know what I'm saying?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

This is a bit bizarre day. Let's. Let's break this down for a second. Okay, first of all, Amy on the left, connection. Then he has a bad impression with the sister, then comes, picks her up. They're going skydiving. They drive to the desert Where? There is a pool.

[Brian Green]

There's a pool where? At the airport?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah. She takes off her shirt. Then he's walking around trying to get into trouble, and then he decides to come over and give her a massage.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, he's trying to see underneath her tank top is probably what's happening. And then he goes and gives her a massage. Like, this is. Is. Yeah. This is weird. I don't think. I don't think this would fly in today's day and age. But you never know. I mean, you know, if you're really into somebody, I guess maybe.

[Chuck Woolery]

Is this a correct assessment of what may have happened to Linda?

[Olinda]

I think that's that arrogant thing coming out again, Chuck, because it was really nice. He came up behind me, gave me a little back massage, but I don't. I think I was melting because it was 115 degrees, maybe a little bit.

[Chuck Woolery]

So now let me ask you something. You guys are. You got a lot of time before you jump in the airplane. This is kind of like your father spanking you and saying, oh, wait a few hours and think about it, you.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Know, Your father spanking you.

[Brian Green]

What you talking about, Chuck? The producers are probably going crazy right now. They're like, chuck, Chuck, get out of. Chuck, Chuck, get out of this. Chuck.

[Chuck Woolery]

Is he getting a little nervous about it? Are you nervous? Or is it his? Is it your first jump?

[Bob]

My first jump.

[Brian Green]

Oh, so both of you.

[Olinda]

We were really nervous. He was so nervous. He was running all around the place because he couldn't sit still. And he was, you know, going into every building and trailer and jumping up and down and.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

See, I would think that in order to suggest this as a first date, you have done this.

[Brian Green]

I would think that if you were even thinking about skydiving and it's something you would do all on your big.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Boy self with somebody you love or trust or whatever. Your best friend. Not a first date.

[Brian Green]

No. I mean, I can't even believe she said yes. If I had never been skydiving. Not with someone I didn't know. No, thanks. I mean, I did do it with someone I didn't know. I actually got on the back of someone I didn't know, or they got on the back of me or however.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Right. That was a tandem.

[Brian Green]

That was a tandem jump. But this is a little. This is a little strange for a.

[Olinda]

First date, but it was a fun sort of nervous. So. Okay, it was good.

[Chuck Woolery]

So now you get on the airplane.

[Bob]

Well, you get on the airplane, you go up to 12, 000ft and you just Jump out. Just jump out.

[Brian Green]

Great description. Thanks. You want to drag that out a little bit more, give us a little bit more color contour. We get on a plane and get up there and just jump.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

That's great.

[Brian Green]

Thanks, Chuck. Bye, everybody. Good night.

[Bob]

And it's awesome.

[Chuck Woolery]

Seems like there should be more to it than that, doesn't it? It's awesome.

[Bob]

You're on the ground, but before you know it, you freefall for like 60 seconds and you're just. It's just over.

[Chuck Woolery]

So you free fall for a whole minute.

[Bob]

Right. It's incredible.

[Chuck Woolery]

Wow. How much does this cost to do this?

[Bob]

About 150A person.

[Chuck Woolery]

150A person? A little more than we gave you, isn't it?

[Brian Green]

So. So now how much do they give them?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I don't know. Apparently there's a date budget.

[Brian Green]

Jeez.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah, it's not even 150.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, not even 150. It seems like a. Not a lot of room for maneuvering there.

[Chuck Woolery]

Is there any romance going on here before or after the job?

[Bob]

Well, right before we jumped, I walked over to and I kissed her.

[Chuck Woolery]

And I wish may been your last kiss wife.

[Brian Green]

So. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Like, what?

[Kristen Joy Odley]

And he wished her luck. Good luck. I hope I see you alive later.

[Brian Green]

Good luck. I hope you have life insurance for your parents. Good night.

[Chuck Woolery]

Really?

[Bob]

I trusted my.

[Brian Green]

I was going to murder you, but I figured this is the better way to go.

[Bob]

Instructor, though.

[Chuck Woolery]

Yeah, well, your instructor has nothing to do with the shoot opening.

[Bob]

No, you're absolutely.

[Chuck Woolery]

So after the jump, everything's great and you love jumping it, right? But now, is there any. Is it get any more? Roman?

[Bob]

Well, we get down and we decide to have a few drinks and just kind of. Kind of get the nerves out of us. You know, our hands were shaking. It was like, you're on five those.

[Chuck Woolery]

Nerves with some, you know, strong drink.

[Bob]

So we're in, we're inside, and, you know, we're drinking. And it's still out at the jump site.

[Brian Green]

Right.

[Bob]

And.

[Brian Green]

What is this? Where is this? I wish I would have done my plane jump out of this place. They got a bar and a pool and hot chicks hanging around trailers you can jump in and out of. I don't know what's going on here. It's awesome.

[Bob]

I give her a kiss, you know, and she kisses me back, you know, no hesitation whatsoever. She just leaned right into it.

[Brian Green]

He's telling the story, and she's like, giving looks like, not exactly how all this happened, Chuck.

[Chuck Woolery]

So how'd the Date end well, it.

[Bob]

Was a long day, so I drove her up to her place and, you know, she got out of the car and we kissed good night, and I said, see you on the show.

[Brian Green]

You're a great gal, and I hope.

[Bob]

To see you again.

[Brian Green]

Good.

[Bob]

And that's about it. Great date.

[Chuck Woolery]

Real good day. I thought you were gonna get shot down in flames, Bob. I swear I did.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I thought so too. I could have swore also.

[Chuck Woolery]

Surprise. I'm happy for you.

[Brian Green]

Let's take a look and see the audience.

[Chuck Woolery]

Right over here. Oh, they chose 53%.

[Brian Green]

You think he'll ask her out on the second date? Of course he will.

[Chuck Woolery]

So you want to ask her out?

[Brian Green]

We'll help supplement your date. Oh, Linda. We're gonna climb the face of Mount Everest for our second date.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Mount Gilfinjaro.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. We're going scuba diving to the Titanic.

[Bob]

You like to go out again?

[Chuck Woolery]

I'd love to come on out, Alinda, but.

[Brian Green]

Oh, it was a. As well that ends well. Oh, she's very short.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I didn't expect that. So now.

[Chuck Woolery]

So now would you. Would you do this again?

[Olinda]

I would do it again. I had such a great time.

[Brian Green]

You would?

[Olinda]

I would.

[Chuck Woolery]

Now let me ask you, after you. After you did your skydive. I've never done this. After you did your skydive, did you sit there and think, let's go up and do it again right now?

[Bob]

Oh, absolutely.

[Brian Green]

Oh, you did.

[Olinda]

I did. But he got sick.

[Brian Green]

He did.

[Chuck Woolery]

Oh, macho Bob.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chuck Woolery]

I'm sure. Thanks for coming on the show. We enjoyed having you.

[Brian Green]

Oh, you too. Love.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

First, I wonder if you're still together.

[Brian Green]

Love it. I doubt it, Bob. Seemed like a real. I don't think. Think she's gonna stay with. Yeah, I just don't. But who knows? You never know. Sometimes I try and find the follow up on these people. Like, what are they doing now? There's people like Brad Garner Grundenberg, who wanted to be in entertainment in the first place. So they're out there. They've done stuff. You know, he's a podcast. He's got a podcast. He had a podcast, Whatever. And then there's people that are really hard to find. I will tell you that most of the people, most of the Love Connection videos that you find, mind, are put up by the people themselves who went on. Like, this was my time at, you know, this is when I went on the Love Connection, but I guess that's how it works. Like, you know, I don't know that there's a Lot of demand for the Love connection on YouTube. Some of them have hundreds of thousands of views. It just depends. Yeah, yeah. That one guy who sometimes we use the clip of who's like, I do it all day long. You know what I'm talking about? That guy. Guy, he's got. There's millions of views on that. I like to think of ourselves as the reason why. That was a gym. That was a gem. That was our first. You never forget your first, kids. You never forget your first. All right. Chrissy and I are just a month, short month away from being in Dania. Dania Beach. Oh, my God, Brian. Cannot get that right. I can't. Cannot. Dania Beach Improv on the 24th of September. We would love to see you there. Tickets available lots of different places on the website of the Dania Beach Improv itself. There's a link in the show Notes down below. You can find it on our website. You can go to Instagram, link in bio. Please go buy yourself some tickets. We would love to see you. If you do buy your tickets, let us know. Know 212-433-3822. That's 212-4333. TCB. We can't wait to see you there. And we can't wait to see you the very next night at the Orlando Funny Bone. At the Bone. We're gonna be there. And you can also get your tickets in the same places I just mentioned. Don't buy from any scalpers who are trying to charge thousands of dollars for the commercial break tickets. You can get them pretty cheap at the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on tick tock and YouTube.com the commercial break. Oh, tcbpodcast.com I forgot to mention the website. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.

[Kristen Joy Odley]

I think so.

[Brian Green]

But I'll tell you that I love you. I love you best to you. Best you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time. Chrissy and I always say. We do say and we must say goodbye. Sam. Sa.