I'm Enlightened, Not You!

Summary

The Commercial Break – Episode Summary

Episode Title: I’m Enlightened, Not You!
Date: November 20, 2024
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley

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Overview

This episode of The Commercial Break is an off-the-walls exploration of cultish spiritual movements, the disaster of Netflix’s live boxing event, and the duo’s lives as parents, internet critics, and enthusiastic southern diners. Bryan and Krissy playfully unravel the recurring theme of con artistry in New Age spirituality and share their comedic takes on pop culture, streaming fails, and everyday family chaos—all with their signature improvisational humor and irreverence.

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Major Discussion Points

1. Netflix Fight Night Fiasco

(00:49–20:31)

• Early Technical Troubles:
  Both hosts report abysmal streaming quality during Netflix’s live boxing event (the Jake Paul vs Mike Tyson card), especially before the women’s fight. They joke about blaming Bryan’s dad’s “one G internet” before realizing the problem was widespread.

  • Notable Quotes:
    • “They cannot do live to save their fucking lives.” – Bryan (01:18)
    • “I’m trying to figure out who does live worse, Elon Musk or Netflix.” – Bryan (01:20)
  • Bryan’s dad gets confused about Twitter/X, thinking you have to “tune into a Twitter.” (04:13)

• Women’s Fight Steals the Show:
  The Serrano vs. Taylor bout impresses Bryan and Krissy with its intensity, grit, and drama—especially after a gruesome headbutt-induced cut.

  • Quotes:
    • “These two women had the biggest balls in the entire stadium all night long.” – Bryan (06:53)
    • “They were going at it… there was blood everywhere.” – Krissy (06:58)
  • Netflix’s cameras repeatedly zoom in on the cut, which genuinely grosses out the hosts.
    • “You could see her skull. It was gross.” – Bryan (07:43)

• Jake Paul vs. Mike Tyson: The Letdown:
  The actual headline fight is described as a flop, with Tyson appearing unfit and Paul holding back out of respect.

  • Quotes:
    • “Jake Paul and Mike Tyson was the biggest flop. Geraldo tried to find Capone vaults. It was fucking shitty.” – Bryan (09:10)
    • “I mean, you could tell almost immediately it was a joke.” – Krissy (11:48)
  • Hilarious aside: The world gets a full view of Mike Tyson’s jockstrap-clad behind on live TV, sparking instant memes.
    • “For a 60-year-old guy… what a great ass.” – Bryan (11:04)
  • Paul’s restraint in not knocking out the aging Tyson is noted approvingly, albeit couched in the show’s usual sarcasm:
    • “Somewhere down in him it said: this is my hero, and I’m not gonna knock him out.” – Bryan (15:57)

• Criticism of the Pay-Per-View Model and the Influencer Economy:
  Discussion of ring girls as influencers and the spectacle-centric mediocrity of modern boxing promotion (plastic surgery shout-out included).

  • “The winner there is the plastic surgeons, because holy shit.” – Bryan (15:21)
  • “Everybody ends up rich but you.” – Bryan (39:12)

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2. Spiritual Grifters & The Cult of Enlightenment

(27:25–41:53)

• Review of ‘Breath of Fire’ Docuseries:
  Bryan and Krissy dissect the Netflix/Youtube documentary on Guru Jagat and the modern resurgence of Kundalini yoga, examining how cultish leaders manipulate spiritual seekers.

  • “It’s as old as time. Someone becomes a guru, a cult starts, someone gets rich, and it’s not you.” – Bryan (35:26)
  • Guru Jagat’s rapid turn to conspiracies (5G, lizard people) after financial troubles is lampooned.
    • “She freaked out and she got super conspiratorial ... This is where a lot of this started, like a seed of this.” – Bryan (34:35)

• New Age Grifts Paralleled with Prosperity Preachers:
  The hosts observe that whether it’s Kundalini, yoga retreats, or televangelists, the scam is the same: “You get rich by making me rich.”

  • “Isn’t it amazing how all of these people preach that you can get rich by making me rich? It’s fucked up.” – Bryan (32:56)

• Fraud in Historical Context – Yogi Bhajan:
  Yogi Bhajan’s cons—including a fake office supplies scheme—and sexual abuse history are covered, with irreverent quips about his supposed yogic powers.

  • “Karma doesn’t work through the phone.” – Krissy (29:57)
  • “He didn’t even do yoga. This ancient secret yoga … was never ancient nor a secret.” – Bryan (30:42)

• Lessons Learned:
  Light-hearted but pointed advice about personal agency and skepticism toward spiritual hierarchy.

  • “Why do I need to pay you [for enlightenment]? The devil’s always in the details.” – Bryan (39:12)

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3. TCB Announcements and Housekeeping

(23:10–26:44)

• Holiday Episode Schedule:
  The podcast will run fresh episodes through the holidays, including the “12 Days of TCB” (Dec 13–25), and feature recommended charities.

  • “Because I have to pay for my powder coffee, so we have fresh episodes all holiday season long!” – Bryan (24:03)

• Season 6 Plans:
  TCB will go live on Twitch in 2025, allowing real-time audience comments (and heckling).

  • “We’re either going to be a runaway hit… or it’s gonna be the funnest place to go make fun of two idiots talking.” – Bryan (26:44)

• Other Podcast News:
  'The Office Ladies' now on Odyssey. TCB boasts about their own dedication by poking fun at their (lack of) audience numbers.

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4. Life, Parenting, and Southern Living Mishaps

(42:27–57:44)

• Rug Store Story – Mistaken Yelling:
  Bryan embarrasses himself by yelling at his kids, only to have a store employee think he’s being shouted at and come running over.

  • “Get your ass over here right now! I never felt so embarrassed in my life.” – Bryan (47:00)

• Skin Cancer Cream Woes:
  Quick, comedic aside about dealing with the side effects of a facial treatment, with a callback to a recent meeting where Bryan’s face looked “like it was melting off.”

  • “It looks like I have a terrible sunburn with blisters… excuse my melting face.” – Bryan (48:27)

• The Smoking Pig Experience:
  A lengthy, funny description of a family outing to a Clemson BBQ institution, including writing on the restaurant’s walls with permanent marker and the kids staring down strangers.

• Deep Southern Accents and “RBB and B”:
  Hilarious misunderstanding with a security guard who refers to Airbnb as “RB and B,” confusing Bryan and Astrid for several awkward moments.

  • “He was RB&B-ing us the whole time. RB and B. That’s the way it goes.” – Bryan (55:29)

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5. Weekend Recaps and Restaurant Reviews

(55:30–58:59)

• Krissy reports a rare romantic date night at Southern Belle, a local restaurant with Southern food.
• Both joke about their Atlanta “zones” (ITP/OTP), city traffic, and how nobody wants to live with them.
• Standard comedic boasting about their own content output versus 'The Office Ladies.'

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6. Closing Bits and Community

(59:08–61:09)

• Shoutouts to comedian Ron Funches, playful self-promotion for TCB’s social channels and stickers.
• Announcements about more video content on YouTube/Spotify.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You don’t need a guru to point you in the right direction… when you start deifying somebody, then you’re getting into real gray area where you’re vulnerable and they are powerful.” – Bryan (37:46)
• “Why are those ring girls still in there? Why do they still do that?” – Bryan’s dad, relayed by Bryan (15:06)
• “If she did something illegal, she should shirk responsibility… but it’s 2024 and that seems to be in vogue.” – Bryan (36:56)
• [On being caught yelling at the rug store:]
  • “I just was screaming. I’m so sorry.” – Bryan (46:58)
• “I'm not going to do Yogi Tea anymore if they don't get the money… If it's just enriching some 60 year old white dude with a long beard and a headdress, then I'm not doing it.” – Bryan (41:04)
• “Why can’t I have my own religion, Krissy?” – Bryan (40:19)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:49–20:31 – Netflix boxing event meltdown & commentary on women’s/meme-ified moments
• 27:25–41:53 – Guru grifters, ‘Breath of Fire’ documentary, Yogi Bhajan, prosperity scams
• 23:10–26:44 – Housekeeping: upcoming series, Twitch plans, podcast world tidbits
• 42:27–48:27 – Parenting mayhem: rug store mix-ups, skincare oversharing
• 48:59–58:59 – Family BBQ adventures, RB&B confusion, weekend recaps
• 59:08–61:09 – Community/closing, plugs for Ron Funches, TCB channels

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Tone & Style

The hosts’ banter is loose, self-effacing, and full of playful pop culture digs. Conversations bounce irreverently between serious critique (New Age con artists, cults) and slapstick personal anecdotes. Even spiritual warnings come with an eye-roll and a punchline, making the show an accessible and comedic take on sometimes heavy topics.

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Summary for New Listeners

This episode is a prime example of The Commercial Break’s mix of comedic improvisation and skeptical deep dives. It’s a blend of modern pop culture critique, self-aware confessions about parenting and adulthood, and gleeful ridicule of internet and streaming oddities. Newcomers will find the hosts endearingly unfiltered and ready to lampoon any “enlightened” authority who puts profit before people—and possibly themselves along the way.

Transcript

[A]

Cause we're better than everyone else.

[B]

On this episode of the Commercial break. You know the story, okay? It's as old as time. Like someone becomes a guru, a cult starts, someone gets rich, and it's not you. Yeah, that's it, Right.

[A]

Yes, Correct.

[B]

All right. There you go. And no one gets spiritual enlightenment because everyone's butt hurt because they were in a cult. Now they have to get out of it and pay for therapy and all that. Elevator.

[A]

Right, right.

[B]

The next episode of the Commercial break starts now. 30 in the morning. Oh, yeah. Guys and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the candy to my Amanda, Kristen Joy. Totally. Best to you, Chris.

[A]

Best to you, Brian.

[B]

Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Wow, wow, wow. What a weekend. I mean, what a Friday night.

[A]

I know.

[B]

For Netflix. What a shit show. What a shit show for Netflix. The PR disaster they deserve. I'm sorry. Love Netflix. They bring us a lot of guests and we. And there's. I love their support of comedy. I think they've changed the landscape in a lot of good ways and then some bad, but they cannot do live.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Save their fucking lives.

[A]

Like the second time.

[B]

This is the second, third, fourth time. I'm trying to figure out who does it, who does live worse, Elon Musk or Netflix. I'm just, I can't decide. My dad and I watched the fights. I know you were watching too. We were texting back and forth.

[A]

Uh huh. Or when we could.

[B]

Yeah, when it was available.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean. So let me give you a little. So I tell my dad when we get first thing, I said, dad, we got Netflix, right? He's like, we got Netflix. We're good. It's installed on my tv. I said, okay, great, fantastic. He's got this new fangled. My dad spent money on a tv. I'm so proud of him.

[A]

So proud.

[B]

Big, nice flat screen, 4K, you know, the whole thing. So proud of him. And so he's got the little Netflix button on the remote. And so it turns out he does have a Netflix account. I was just shitting you guys. But anyway, so we turn it on right as it gets started at 8 o'. Clock, everything is fine until right before the Taylor Serrano fight. And then shit starts going haywire. I mean it. But here's the thing. So we're at my dad's house, two of the kids are on iPads. My stepmom is in the other room watching TV. Astrid's, you know, looking for studio chairs in 4K or something. I don't know what she's doing down there. I got my phone connected to the Internet that like we're not exactly in the middle of civilization with my father. So I thought maybe he's got like that old, you know, one G Internet going on. He's like, dad, I think it's just your Internet's congested. So we run around the house making everybody get off the Internet, get off the Internet. And no improvement whatsoever. It's sticky. It's like 102p. You know what I'm talking about? I said to dad, I go, this is how you guys used to watch fights, like in 102. Quality. Like it was, it was just fuzzy and weird. It looked.

[A]

I know I kept like getting out of Netflix, getting back into it, cuz I thought that was the problem. I didn't know. I mean, it would freeze, stop, whatever.

[B]

So I did all the things that my, you know, technologically advanced calcium filled brain knows to do, which is basically back out of Netflix, turn on another show on Netflix to see if it has the same problem. And what I found, my dad was watching the Diplomat at some point, so. Which is a great show. So good. So good. I love that Kerry Washington. Is that her name? No, no, Kerry Russell. Carrie Russell. Oh my God, what a. What a smoke show. And such a great actress.

[A]

Yeah, it's a great show.

[B]

She was so good in. In the Americans. Did you watch the Americans?

[A]

But I kind of want to go.

[B]

Back and go watch the Americans. So good. One of my favorite television shows. Anyway, I back out, I turn on the diplomat, perfect 4K quality. And then I go back to the live and it's another fuzzy, weird, pixelated bullshit. And. And all they're doing is talking like the Common. You know who is doing the Common? Who is that? Who was the lady who was doing the Amber Rose?

[A]

No, Rosie Perez.

[B]

No, not Rosie Perez, but the lady who was on the panel with the. The beautiful black girl with the curly hair. Was that Amber Rose?

[A]

No, that's not Amber.

[B]

Okay, I. I don't know what I'm talking about. Anyway, Kate something. Anyway, I don't know. So the. So we're watching it. Okay, great. You know Rosie Perez, that obnoxious announcer who will not shut the up to save his life. Y. I don't know who that was. You see his hair? That guy looked like he like, he's like a Vegas dinner show guy who just like rolled into. Rolled into Texas Stadium and decided to do some commentary on the, on the fights. He was really obnoxious. I'm sorry. I gotta say, he. He drove me crazy.

[A]

And then he had Cedric the Entertainer, too.

[B]

Love Cedric the Entertainer. I thought Rosie did great.

[A]

Rosie did do great.

[B]

Roy Jones Jr. I thought he lended some great perspective though, the commentator, whatever that twad Blue in the bl. Whatever his name was. And Roy Jones kept on fighting about Tyson biting his glove, but whatever. Okay, we'll get on with it. So. So before the. The ladies start fighting, it's like, turns into a shit show. Then we're. Then I'm getting kicked out. Chrissy and I are texting each other back and forth. I start going on. On X, which my dad has no clue how X works, right? So I'm on X. I'm like, look, Dad, X everybody. There's like millions of people, you know, there's like 4 million people complaining about this right now. He's like, how do you do that? What channel is that you got on there? On the. On the X. How do you. How do you tune into a Twitter? And I'm like, dad, you don't. A Twitter. You tune into a fight. What are you talking about? And so we're just. I'm just going through the list. Yeah. And I'm watching how many people are complaining. With so many funny memes. It's. It's just lovely. I just. Netflix is falling on its face. And so I start telling my dad. I'm like, we're gonna have to watch this tomorrow. Like, there's. I don't. I don't know how we're gonna get through an entire fight like this, but we power through and we watch this fight between Amanda Serrano and Kate Taylor. Katie Taylor. I have never in my life. And I'm a guy who will tune into the big boxing events. It's not my favorite sport in the world, but I understand that there's something a little bit majestic about boxing, about two people beating the tar out of each other and then smacking hands in the end and saying, you know, good fight. There is something like a little majestic. And I think it's just a boy in me who, like, you know, I don't know something about it. And I like listening to the commentators talk about strategy when it just looks like they're really just beating the shit out of each other. But apparently there's strategy to it. These two women put on a show like I have never seen in any boxing match ever.

[A]

It was incredible.

[B]

If you did not watch this and you have the stomach for it, go rewatch the Serrano Taylor fight on Netflix. And you are in for such a treat because these two women had the biggest balls in the entire stadium all night long.

[A]

They really did. I mean, they were going at it. I mean, there was the cut that happened on the face, and there was blood everywhere. It was nuts.

[B]

Round three or round four? Katie Taylor head butted, and I don't think on purpose head butted Serrano. And it opened up a wound above her eye on the. On the outside of the eyebrow. Oh, stitches. Yeah. To super clip that.

[A]

I know. I was like, God.

[B]

And she started bleeding immediately, and it just got worse from there. It was grotesque. It was hard to look at. And then Netflix, in their infinite directorial wisdom, decided to pan in on that cut. Any chance how many people threw up? I mean, you.

[A]

I know. I thought I was going to see, like, her skull.

[B]

Yeah, you could see her skull. It was gross. It was gross. And I think they probably could have handled that a little bit. If it was me in the directorial booth, I probably would have showed it from a little bit further away. Not so close. But they were showing the cut guy, like, sticking stuff in there. And.

[A]

Yeah, that makes me shiver.

[B]

My dad and I. And I am not too squeamish about blood in general. Pimple popping, yes. Okay. But blood, not really. But I had to turn away. It was. It was. But after the third or fourth round after that cut happened, these two just got within one foot of each other any chance they could. And smash for smash, hit for hit, pound for pound, they beat the shit out of each other. And these punches were landing with force. And each one of them, one would do a combination. Right, left, left, left.

[A]

I know. I kept thinking was somebody was going to go down.

[B]

Somebody had to go down.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I thought to myself, I was. I told my dad, I'm like, someone's going to die. This is Rocky 4.

[A]

I know.

[B]

This is Rocky 4. When they just start beating the shit off each other, and it becomes a contest to see who's going to die first. Yeah. And I was like, somebody throw in the towel.

[A]

I know.

[B]

We were mesmerized by this fight. And thank God. Thank God that Netflix or whoever had the wisdom to put this fight on before Jake Paul and Mike Tyson. Because Jake Paul and Mike Tyson was the biggest flop.

[A]

It really was.

[B]

Geraldo tried to find Capone vaults. It was fucking shitty.

[A]

It was. And we saw Mike Tyson's ass.

[B]

I mean, I know everybody's seen this meme right now, but I. I think I woke people up in the house, like Everybody was sleeping except for me and my dad. And maybe my stepmom was up somewhere, but she was in the other room trying to, you know, not bother our Internet, our Internet connection. But halfway through the Serrano Taylor fight, in one of the in between rounds, they go to the locker room, the locker room where Mike Tyson's son is interviewing Mike Tyson right before the fight. And so all you see is this chest up shot of the two guys. And he's saying, hey, dad, what's gonna happen tonight? You know, my. Is this a fight or just have some fun times? It's all in good fun, you know, I beat the shit out of him, you know, whatever he's saying, okay, sweet moment. They give each other a hug and Mike Tyson kisses his son. I thought it was a very sweet moment. Like, you know, dad, you're about to die. I love you. And as Mike turns around to walk away from the interview, the camera guy pans out and Mike is walking away in a high waisted thong.

[A]

Well, is it. Was that a jockstrap? It's a jockstra, yeah.

[B]

But all this shows is just his naked ass.

[A]

I know. I go, oh my God, I just saw his ass. And Jeff was like, what? What?

[B]

Had to rewind. I was on the floor, my dad was like, what was that? And I go, dad, that was Mike Tyson's ass. And he goes, is that on purpose? I go, I don't think so, dad. I really don't. I think it took the director too long to cut. I think he forgot to say switch to three.

[A]

Ye really funny.

[B]

Becoming the world's instant, an instant classic meme all over. I had to go to Twitter immediately where people were just on it like left and right. And I mean, first of all, gotta say, for a 60 year old guy, almost 6 year old guy, what a great ass.

[A]

Looking good. My.

[B]

Yeah, mine looks worse. And I'm much younger than. But second of all, what a up of Netflix. And then we get to the big show, you know, Jake Paul comes in spraying his brother, spraying deodorant all over him and some car. Did you see that?

[A]

The car situation?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And the spray.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. This deodorant, I mean, come on, guys.

[A]

And the car, like really, you aren't rich enough.

[B]

You gotta spray the. You gotta spray your deodorant all over your brother. You think your brother is about to go in the ring with Mike Tyson. You think he wants deodorant all over him? I mean, whatever. Oh, God, just terrible. From beginning to end. I wish.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, you could tell almost immediately.

[B]

That it was the joke.

[A]

It was, yeah. It was basically Jake Paul just not hurting him.

[B]

Well, I mean in the. Yeah. You could tell from the beginning that Jake was, it seemed to not be taking this all that seriously. I mean the car, the entourage, which by the way, I don't know where they find these bodyguards, but God damn, are they big. Did you notice? I thought, well, let's these guys get in and fight because these are the real heavyweights. Some of those bodyguards were like 10ft tall, 600 pounds of pure muscle. It looked, it looked. Does Jake Paul need that kind of security? Maybe he does, I don't know. Anyway, so he comes out razzle dazzle, the whole nine yards and then Mike Tyson can barely walk to the ring and he just comes out by himself, looking a little scared, if I'm being honest. And from the moment the bell rings, Mike gets in there, lands a couple of punches and they look like they, he, it looked like Jake got hit. Like he, he felt it, but he just, he was planted in the middle. It's like his legs were sewn to the ground. Mike Tyson, he couldn't move on his back foot. No. And, and Jake, between the height and the reach advantage, Jake Paul just, he could have destroyed Mike quite frankly, because Mike was just a sitting duck. And I'll give Jake one piece. Like, I don't want to tell you that Jake is winning me over, but Jake, I turned the corner just the tiny bit on Jake over the weekend and I'll explain why. He's getting paid a lot of money and everybody wants to see the show and everybody wants to see somebody drop somebody. That's why they're there. But it becomes pretty apparent by round number three that Mike is in no condition to fight anybody, let alone Jake Paul. I mean maybe like a 59 year old against a 59 year old, maybe Mike then where they're just both kind of standing there not moving like, you know those snow, those snow snowmen that you blow up during Christmas put out in your front. Yeah. They kind of bobble back and forth. Yeah, that would you Mike in that, in a snowman, I mean that would be a good fight. But Jake Paul, no, Jake's in peak physical condition and he is really big and he has a great reach and he has knocked people, a lot of people out.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And you could just tell that he's.

[A]

30 years younger too.

[B]

Yeah, he's, he's what, 28 years old? He's like 27 years old. That's the, that's peak physical condition when I was 27 years old. I kind of look like I do right now, but I could have been in peak physical condition now I'm, you know, now I'm just lucky to get up by 8 o' clock in the morning. This was not. The joke was on Netflix. The joke was on all of us. And Jake pulled off one of the greatest promotional con jobs ever, quite frankly.

[A]

And, well, he had a lot to do with the women's fight beforehand. And in fact, on that little documentary series leading up to the fight that I watched last week, he was talking about the.

[B]

I saw it.

[A]

He was like, that's the one I'm really interested in.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And quite frankly, that was the one.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, that was it.

[A]

Or that. And the ringside girls, Boobs, yes.

[B]

They looked like they were about to pop, like balloons.

[A]

The camera. But I mean, the boobs on either side were. Would be flanking the person that they were talking to.

[B]

Yeah. Ring girls in 2024. I mean, I get it, but my dad was like, why are those ring girls still in there? Why do they still do that? And I'm. I don't know that, to be honest with you.

[A]

They're all influencers.

[B]

They are all influencers.

[A]

Yeah, we look. We were looking at stuff the next day.

[B]

Wow, the winner there is the plastic surgeons. Because holy shit. I told my. My dad even said, those things look like they're going to pop. They did look like they were going to pop. They were in those. Those tops were so tight, the boobs were just. They couldn't go anywhere else. Once the third round was over, it was like, abundantly clear that this was not, not great for Mike Tyson. And as a matter of fact, the commentating crew, especially Roy Jones and Rosie Perez, they really had a lot of concern for Mike. They were like, this is not good. Like, he's not doing well. And he kept biting his glove like he was sucking his thumb or something.

[A]

Did you see that?

[B]

Yeah, it was a little weird. But here's why I turned the corner a little bit. Jake, in being the showman that he is being kind of the circus, this, I don't know. Like, he's the guy who the circus runs around, right? He's the circus master. He's the. What do they call it? The ringleader. He's the ringleader, he's the tent master. He puts on the show and I bet inside of him being the problem child, quote, unquote, the best thing that he could do for his career and to make himself more of A shit show is to knock Mike Tyson out. But he didn't know somewhere down in him it said, this is the respect. This is my hero, and I'm not gonna knock him out. Yeah, yeah. This is my hero, or at least my boxing hero. And I'm not gonna knock him out. I'm not gonna do him a disservice, even though it would do me a service. I'm not gonna do him a disservice and I'm not gonna, you know, go completely easy on him, but I'm just let me hit him a few times and then we'll get out of this. Yeah. The fight went so quick. It was no more than 30, 35 minutes long because they did two, six. Was it six or eight two minute rounds? I think it was a two minute rounds. 16 minutes altogether. A minute in between each. Each round. It was just. It was over and done with. And you could tell that the crowd inside of the AT&T Stadium was highly disappointed in what was going on. They were booing. There was almost no cheering going on whatsoever. Can you imagine paying $43,000 to get inside of that?

[A]

Is that how much?

[B]

Actually, I didn't see any tickets for sale on the floor. When I looked like five minutes after this show started, I looked. They had so many tickets available up in the upper seats. You could get in the. You could get in the stadium for like 60 bucks. But if you wanted to get down in the lower bowl, it was a couple thousand dollars.

[A]

I can imagine.

[B]

I didn't see any seats available for the on the floor seats. And so I imagine those were all promotional tickets given away by Netflix and sponsors and all that other celebrities and all that other stuff. But this was just like, it was kind of disappointing from beginning and the Tyson fight was disappointing for beginning. And Netflix is obviously terrible at doing live.

[A]

They should just give it up something because in the end it did all work fine. But it was leading up to it, it was really bad.

[B]

When you have the thing everybody is talking about, you have to have so many servers ready for that network traffic. You can't just scale it the moment that it starts happening. And I think that's what was going on. They said like 60 million, about 60 million people were probably streaming it live across the world. You had to be ready for 100 million people doing that. And they just weren't ready. The network, it just got congested and they didn't like. It took them an hour to fix it because it wasn't until about the fifth round of the Women's fight. Did things start getting a little bit more clear now to their, I guess, credit? I'm not even sure I would give them credit for this, but to their credit, by the time that Paul and Tyson started, it seemed to have been fixed.

[A]

Yeah, it does.

[B]

But when everybody started jumping on right before the Serrano fight, it just, it was a shit show for at least 45 minutes to an hour. Shit show. Kicking me off. Scrambled television. Very blurry and freezing. Freezing. Slow. Pixelated.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And so. And to some degree, and I told my dad this, I said, I'm kind of glad this is a little bit fuzzy because I don't want to look at that cut anyway. I just don't want to look at that cut anymore. That cut above her eye was just gross. And then what about afterwards when Serrano was talking shit about Katie Taylor headbutting? They said, oh, they do it dirty. She just headbutts everybody. I don't think so. I think she was just fighting. That's my opinion. She just leans her head in and just starts fighting. What, those two women. I will pay a hundred dollars to see that rematch. A hundred dollars. I would definitely do pay per view to watch those two fight again. Yeah. Jake Paul and Mike Tyson. There will be no rematch. However, the word is, is that Tyson and McGregor are talking about that fight. Tyson and I mean, not Tyson, Jake, Paul and Conor McGrego. Now that MMA style, now that, that'll be good, is a fight I will watch on YouTube after it's done because Jake's not going to get me twice. There's no way. But at least Conor McGregor is kind of close to his age. What's Conor counter, 35 or something? Yeah, I mean, at least Conor McGregor would put on a fight. He has the legs to put on a fight. So mad respect to Mike Tyson. You're still the greatest that ever lived. I don't care. This is just a little pockmark on you, you know, just a little pock mark on an otherwise exemplary boxing record. And Jake, I give you a little bit of respect, but you did pull one of the greatest boxing con jobs ever, making everybody believe that this was going to be the fight that they needed to watch. And I sure am glad that I did, but for not the reasons I thought, you know, Exactly.

[A]

No, it was different than I thought.

[B]

I wasn't disappointed that even though I have 34 children who wake up at 5:15 in the morning that I stayed up till 2am to watch all of. What time did you get to Bed?

[A]

Yeah, it was 1:32.

[B]

Yeah. By the time I took a shower and got in the bed, it was about 2am and my lovely wife let me sleep. Been so I first time since I can remember. I mean, I think I slept to like 10:15. That's amazing. And you have children. Yeah, 10:15. Life is good. And when you sleep till 10:15 and you don't have calcium as an excuse anymore, that is a fantastic day at the office. So, all right, let's take a break. Lots more to talk about. We'll be back.

[C]

Brian might have just said it's time to take a break, but some of us have to work right now. And by work, I mean gently nudge you, nay beg you to follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok CBpodcast. Because, listen, the more followers we get, the more clout I get with Chrissy and Bryan. If you've got something to say, give us a call and leave us a voicemail at 212-4333, TCV or shoot us a text. One more thing. Check out our website, tcvpodcast.com where you can find all of our audio and video and. And even request a new sticker from the Contact Us form.

[B]

Bye. Okay. A little house cleat. Little house. A little housekeeping. Before we get started, I'm going so fast this morning, my mouth is. My mouth can't keep up.

[A]

It's that powdered cold coffee.

[B]

Oh, it's that powdered cold coffee. That shit is full of caffeine. But not full of taste, I'll tell you that much. I mean, my wife came to me like a month ago, a month and a half ago. I love Starbucks. And the only reason why I love my Starbucks is because it's very close to the house. It's like I can walk there. So I have no, like, particular allegiance to Starbucks. It's just a familiar taste that I like the taste of the coffee, it's fine. It does the trick. And it's fully caffeine, right?

[A]

Yeah, my wife.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. Everybody. And the cold brew coffee there is pretty good. I mean, I do have to say it's pretty good. Is it as good as I've ever had? No, but it's pretty good. So my wife starts telling me about this TikTok Rage, the Nescafe cold brew powdered coffee, right? It's. You just put it in a cup, you put some water and ice in there, the cream, sugar to your taste. She started telling me about this and she's like, listen, we could really save a lot of money on start because I spend, what, $2,000 a year on Starbucks? I don't have $2,000. American Express would like that $2,000 back. So I'm like, okay, I'll give it a try for the sake of the family and do my. You know, every once in a while, Astrid goes around tightening up the belt, and it's good to do. My coffee is the first thing to go. And all of my British extensions on Amazon Prime, Brit Box, and Acorn tv. She's like, are we still watching those? And I'm like, every night. And she's like, do we really need them? I always feel guilty. It's like she makes it sound like it's food in the children's mouth or Brit Box. I'm like, are the kids gonna eat? Probably not. Well, just one more month of Britbox, if you don't mind. They look fine. They look fine. You can see their ribs. They're kids. The ribs will be fine. There goes that microphone. I'm getting a new one when we change the studio. Swear to God, I am. It's decided, Astrid. No more food for the kids. I need a new microphone. So. So I try that Nescafe, that cold brew coffee. And, you know, she buys it, and she made one the first time we got it in the. In the mail or Amazon or whatever, and it was really good. And since then, I have not been able to replicate how good it tasted because I keep trying different combinations, and it just doesn't taste all that good to me. And it does taste powdery, like, it tastes like powder.

[A]

And the powdery stuff is hard to get right. You have to be able to mix it the right way.

[B]

Is that it? Maybe I should take one of those. Like, she has a blender, like the coffee blenders. Maybe I should take a coffee blender and do it that way. Anyway, not what I wanted to talk about. Little house clean cleaning. House cleaning. Little house cleaning going on here. Okay, let's do some house cleaning. All right, number. Number one, 12 days of TCB. First of all, we're going to be doing fresh episodes through the entire holiday season. I know a lot of podcasts take off time during the holiday season. Some don't even send any episodes out. I can't believe that that's a dumb thing to do. But anyway, they do. We won't, because we. Because I have to pay for my powder coffee. So we have fresh episodes coming at you all holiday season long, including the 12 days of TCB. The 13th through the 25th. We'll do some special stuff in between there. We'll talk about a few charities that we like in the hopes that we can raise some money for that. We've gotten suggestions. We'll take a few of those suggestions. We'll put them out there. Also, we've. I've done a little research, trying my best to make sure we're not, you know, sending money to Jake, Paul. And number one, that's about our schedule. Number two, the Office Ladies is now on the Odyssey app, anywhere you can find your podcast, really. But they are here with Odyssey. And now the Office Ladies are. You know, they were.

[A]

I love those Office Ladies.

[B]

Yeah, they're so. I. I really do like the show. It's a rewatch show, or it was a rewatch show. They've now been through all the Office this episode, so now they're going to do more of like, kind of like a thing like we do, you know, chitty chatty. They're going to take comments and questions from the listeners. I'm not getting paid to say this. I'm just sharing with you that the Office Ladies are now on Odyssey. We're happy to have them on our network, and for what reason, I don't know, but they're happy to. They're happy to be here, too. So go check out the Office Ladies. And then number three, it has been decided in season number six, which will start early next year in January, we will be doing an episode of the Commercial break during the weekdays. I'll. I'll tell you more about this when the time comes during the weekdays on Twitch. So we will be recording an episode live that you can tune into, comment, ask questions, tell us how terrible we are, all that good stuff right there live. So you'll hurt our feelings.

[A]

While that's exciting and scary at the.

[B]

Same time, anytime we do anything tech, with technology or where people can actually tell us how bad we are while it's happening, right? It's gonna be. Yeah. We're either gonna be a runaway hit. There's three things are gonna happen. It's one of three things, but we're.

[A]

Going to run away.

[B]

Yeah. Runaway hit. Yes. All the audience is going to run away. We'll have, like, one Twitch lip follow like we have on all of our live shows so far, or number three, it's just gonna be. It's gonna be the funnest place to go make fun of two idiots talking. Twitch is a tough place. I've been to a lot of those Twitch channels. And if you're not doing what they want you to do, dude, it can be a real shit show, I imagine. Yeah, I imagine some little teenager is going to find us, like, randomly, and then he's going to tell all his friends, this is the best place to talk shit about two old white people. Yeah, but whatever, we'll take it. We'll take the listeners. Okay, what did I want to talk about? I wanted to talk, ask you if you had seen the end of Breath of Fire.

[A]

I did watch Breath of Fire.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yes, I did watch the end of it.

[B]

You watched the end of Breath of Fire. And tell me more about what you thought about this young lady.

[A]

I don't know. Yeah, Guru. Yeah. I mean, the fact that she died, I knew that was happening.

[B]

Right.

[A]

We knew that from earlier episodes, but, you know, you didn't know what manner she died, what happened. It's a little suspicious. I can kind of see how some conspiracy theories might have grown from this because she was really off the rocker. I mean, it was 20, 20, 2020.

[B]

And.

[A]

Yeah. And so she then couldn't do the live shows. She couldn't make money anymore. She was in trouble. What was the thing too, with the. Did she meet somebody?

[B]

She met a guy, and she fell in love with the guy very quickly. Like it was a very fiery relationship. Someone called it an intertwining of two narcissistic personalities driving the worst in each other. Right. And they don't focus on him a whole bunch. And maybe that's because. Because legally they, you know, they don't want to be liable for anything they say about him. And where is he? What happened to him? Yeah, okay, so, yeah, so she dies in the end of a rather strange. Like she breaks her leg and then she gets a pulmonary embolism and dies of a heart attack weeks after she had the surgery for that broken leg. Now, she did fly from. She broke the leg in Germany. She flew back. We're talking about this Breath of Fire, this young lady who took over Kundalini Yoga or took the. Kind of. Of took the banner and ran with it.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Kundalini Yoga. From the guy who started it, who was Yogi Bajran back in the 60s and 70s, and he had hundreds of thousands of followers. He started Yogi Tea. He started many, many businesses, actually. But it. What we Learned in the 90s and early 2000s after a book was written about him is really he was a serial sexual abuser who was also a con artist artist who made a lot of businesses that simply conned People. That's it. Including one where they would call. This is the craziest. They would call offices in the 80s and they would be like, you're out of printer paper. And they would be like, oh, we are? Yes, you're out of printer paper and we need to refill it. And they would be like, oh, okay, okay, I'm sending 50 boxes of printer paper. Sounds good to me. They would invoice them and then never send the paper. They were just like. They were literally blind. Calling people offices and telling them they needed office supplies.

[A]

And a part of that too, was that apparently. Apparently the. The yogi guy said, karma doesn't work through the phone.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So I'm okay to stand people.

[B]

When you use technology. Don't worry about it. Yeah, doesn't worry. So this guy was. He was really. And we also learned that Yogi. The Yogi himself, Yogi bg. Yogi BG didn't even do yoga. Didn't even do yoga. And this ancient secret yoga that he brought to the world, Kundalini Yoga, was never ancient nor a secret. Something he made up almost whole cloth, taking pieces from other things he had learned as a Sikh back in Pakistan. So this is. And. And listen, if you've ever done Kundalini yoga, then, you know, there is something to this. So whatever he stumbled upon, he stumbled upon something.

[A]

I mean, any breath work is a real thing.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

I mean, it can help you relax, it can help you, you know, get excited.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Make your. Make you kind of lightheaded and give.

[B]

You a hot, hard one too. Yeah.

[A]

So breath works a real thing. But. But yeah, it was under a false premise that this was some ancient thing.

[B]

Yeah, Listen, so here's the point. The guy was a con artist, basically, and he did not such great things. Now, a lot of the people that followed him went on to do great things in the world, but he himself. So it's hard to. It's hard to throw the baby out with the bathwater. But this young lady, about 10 years ago, 12 years ago, went to LA and started reinvigorating the Kundalini Yoga, I guess, practice by opening up a studio in la. And it became the most trendy, fashionable thing. And she became.

[A]

Celebrities were going. Madonna was there, Demi Moore, all these people.

[B]

And she became a guru herself. People really started following her. She was doing. She took advantage of social media. She was doing lives. She was doing YouTube, she was doing all this other stuff. And people really started following her. But in 2020. But she was all, excuse me, she was also Known to spend money with. Abandoned.

[A]

Yes, she would.

[B]

And people were getting conned is the only way to say it. If you went to Level 1, then you had to go to Level 2, then you had to go to level 3. Sounding familiar? Scientology had to go to Level 4. The more money you paid, the more.

[A]

The closer you.

[B]

The closer you got spiritual enlightenment. Yes. And the more money you would pay, the more access you would get to her. That's right. That is such horseshit and against everything. If you really pay attention to this kind of new age spiritual movement, it's really. She would call it prosperity yoga or prosperity meditation. Prosperity yoga.

[A]

Prosperity preaching.

[B]

Yes. By the way, the Buddha would. Would walk 50 miles in a day to sweep someone's front porch for a grain of rice. Yes, that's it. And he didn't expect that grain of rice. He. If you really take this back to all of these, like, lineages, this is abhorrent to anything that they preached or practiced. I'm not saying you have to, like, like, you know, whip yourself on the back in order to, like, you know, get spiritual.

[A]

Same with the prosperity preaching within the Christian world.

[B]

Isn't it amazing? Isn't it amazing how all of these people preach that you can get rich by making me rich? That's up. And it's just like, think about that for one second before you write the check. Listen, people should get paid for the work that they do. $5 for a class of yoga. 25, whatever. It is cool. But the fact that she wanted people to follow her, give her money, and be empowered, it's just, like, should be a red flag altogether. And in 2020, when everything shut down and her money started going away because people could no longer go to these conferences and all this other stuff, she freaked out and she got super conspiratorial and she started. The vaccines are going to awaken with the 5G waves. This is where a lot of this started. Like a seed of this. It gets amplified in this community, a community that I know very well. It gets amplified in this community because of people like Guru Jagat. As a matter of. Maybe because of Guru Jaga, she starts talking about crazy skinwalker aliens running around and lizard people, you know, controlling the world, and pedophile rings that extend through the entire, you know, universe. And it's like, hold on, hold on. I thought we were just meditating here. I didn't realize. I didn't realize. I didn't realize science wasn't science. Yeah, but it is here, where you have to be careful because a Lot of times in New Age spirituality, they will claim that the reality is not reality. It's your reality, and you get to make it. And don't listen to anyone else's reality. Fine, great. But really what makes reality is that the all of us, rather than having our own realities, walking around in a psychedelic haze, is that we can all agree on some things are actually happening as we see them together, like science and math and it's raining and like, you know, people are getting saved by this or that or people are dying because of this or that. Truth is truth. It's facts. That's our connection to each other, is if. When we can agree on these things, it's a. It's a. It's a system of trust that we're all seeing and doing the same things and getting some similar results. But Guru Jaga just throws all that without the baby with the bathwater when her money goes away and decides that everyone is an alien. It was crazy. Yeah.

[A]

It really took a turn.

[B]

It did. And so history repeated itself. She started becoming a con artist. Notice, telling people to work for free, taking their money, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. You know the story. Okay. It's as old as time. Like, someone becomes a guru, a cult starts, someone gets rich, and it's not you. Yeah, that's it, right?

[A]

Yes, correct.

[B]

All right, there you go. And no one gets spiritual enlightenment because everyone's butt hurt because they were in a cult and now they have to get out of it and pay for therapy and all that other good.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Which is another cult, according to Guru Chaga. But let's go. Let's move on from it. Guru Jagat goes to Germany. As all this is going on, like 2022, she. She runs to Germany to do, like a. A meditation retreat, and she falls in the shower. She breaks her ankle pretty badly, breaks her leg. And she refuses surgery in Germany for whatever reason, probably because the skin walking aliens are the ones that are doing the search. They're trying to kill her. And she decides to fly back to LA to have the surgery. And the doctors are like, don't do that. Of course you don't do that. You've got a compound fracture. You need to have surgery immediately or you could have all kind of terrible things could happen, but she does it. She survives the flight, she gets there, they do the surgery, everything's fine. They have her on blood thinners to hopefully avoid an embolism. But an embolism, quote, unquote, happens a couple weeks later, and she dies of A heart attack. It's left very open ended. Right. But the documentary tries not to skirt into conspiracy theory land too much. It doesn't want to be what it's essentially ascribing not to be in it. So it wraps it up a little neatly where people are saying, well, we want to believe that she's still alive, but the truth is, you know, there's a death certificate and she's probably dead. But you wonder.

[A]

Yeah, you do kind of wonder. It was kind of, and I don't mean to say sound callous saying this, but it's kind of convenient that she just died.

[B]

Well, yeah, if she's really dead, then it sounds callous, but if she's not dead, if she is in fact living somewhere else and just has avoided responsibility, then, you know, know it's not callous. It's, it's whatever. So I'm not here to say one way or the other, I don't know. I don't know Guru. I don't know anybody who's connected to her directly. Yeah, I don't really care, to be honest with you. I mean, should anybody care honestly, if you spent your money to go to those things? If you felt better in the moment. Well, you felt better in the moment. If you gave guru Jagat $6 million and she's no longer responding to your phone calls, well, that's a different thing altogether. Yeah, but if you spent, you know, a thousand dollars on a retreat and it made you feel better in the moment, well. Well, then that's on you, isn't it? And you got something out of it. You felt better in the moment. You know, I'm not saying that if she did something illegal she should shirk responsibility, but it's 2024 and that seems to be in vogue. So that's just good. Exactly.

[A]

It doesn't matter anymore.

[B]

Yeah. Wow. You don't need a guru to point you in the right direction. There are lots of books and you can go to retreats and you can go to classes and you can commune with like minded people and do like minded things and have fun. But when you start deifying somebody, then you're getting into real gray area where you're vulnerable and they are powerful. And then if you, if they are so great and they have attained some kind of enlightenment here on earth that you're looking for, why. Why are they so much better than you are? Why are they so much different than you are? How did they do it? But you can't un. You pay money. How did they all of a sudden get anointed, but you have to pay a bunch of money or, or do all these tasks or suck them off or whatever it happens to be. To get there. Think about that for just one second. If they did it, why can't you? If they did it without paying anybody, getting molested, you know, conning somebody into spending lots of money, if they did it, why can't you? The truth is you can. So. So I'm not sure that anybody in the commercial break audience, you know, would be vulnerable in this way. But I'm just sharing in case there's someone, like, on the outskirts of one of these, like, weird New Agey, or maybe not even New Agey, you know, Christian, whatever. Why do you have to give all your money to them so that you can do what they did, which is become rich on their own? Can't you just like, you know, save that money? Like, okay, you want to give to the church because they're, you know, giving to homeless people and you like that idea. Or, you know, it's Christmas and some of the kids don't have presents and you're going to give some gifts. I get all that stuff. I do all that stuff. But I don't give my money endlessly to somebody who claims to have some kind of enlightenment that I don't have and I never have. And I'll tell you why. Because I just asked the simple question, why can't I? Why can't I do that? Like, can't I do that on my own? Why do I need you to do that for me? Why do I need to pay you to do that for me? Me? The devil's always in the details. It always is. And the reality for a lot of these New Age places is they blend reality and truth so that they can get something out of you. That's it. Everybody ends up rich but you. And that's, at the end of the day, what really drives me crazy about some of these places. Everybody ends up rich except for me. Why not me? Why can't I have my own, own religion? Chrissy?

[A]

Well, it's another scam. And there's a million of them out there, so this one just happens to involve yogi.

[B]

That's.

[A]

I really like yogi tea too. And now I don't know.

[B]

I know. Well, and they never really tell you whether or not those ladies are getting the money or not, because if they were, there's like a whole harem of women with the original yogi Bajrat. There's a whole harem of women who signed NDAs before he died. And if they signed the NDA, they got 50% of his wealth indefinitely, like for life as long as they were alive. And some of the women decided to the NDA. I'm going to write a book or I'm going to tell my story about how I was abused.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so Yogi T is one of the things that they would benefit from if they were in fact getting the money. But no one ever specifies in the documentary whether or not they're going to get into that. Yeah. Because I'm not going to do Yogi Tea anymore if they don't get the money. I'm not buying Yogi Tea if it's just enriching some, you know, 60 year old white dude with a long beard and a headdress, then I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it for a guy in white robes. I'm not doing it.

[A]

I'm gonna look into it.

[B]

Yes. But if it's going to those ladies who are abused, and that's a different story altogether. I'll drink Yogi tea till I'm blue in the face. While we're on it, send money to Chrissy and Brian care of gofundme. We're broke.com gofundme your enlightened we're broke.com job. We'd love to have your money. All right, let's take a break. We'll be back.

[C]

In case you guys were wondering, I am currently trapped in the closet in the studio being forced to record liner after liner and I never get to leave. So help me by following us on Instagram at the commercial break and on tik tok@tcb podcast and go to our website tcbpodcast.com for more information about Brian and Chrissy and access to our massive catalog of video and audio episodes. Now please text us at 212-4333, TCB. And tell Brian and Chrissy to let me out of the closet.

[B]

Alrighty. You know I told you we went to my dad's house this weekend.

[A]

Yes, you did.

[B]

So we are. So we had a great time. You know, dad and I watched the fight and then we woke up on Saturday and then we went and bought some, some accoutrements here for the studio that we're changing for the 55,000 time. My, my stepmom was like, do you guys change that studio often? And I go, well, we change the wires pretty often because you can see we paid a guy to come in here and professionally clean up these wires and this is what we ended up with. If I can show you a shot.

[A]

Of that right now, it is a hot mess back there.

[B]

Just the thought of undoing all those wires and doing them again is making me, like, sick to my stomach. I was in here last night staring at them and going, I have no clue. I don't even know where to start. I don't know where to start. I really don't. Last time I had to put a piece of tape around each one and name it, which is probably what I'm gonna have to do again and then do it. But I'm not paying anybody to do it again. Because if this is what I got when I paid, I can do that on my own. I can do Nightmare on my own. I don't need it. So we were up in the, you know, South Carolina, Clemson area. We went to this. To this rug store, right? And we go to this rug store and it's pretty empty. It's like a. It's like a rug outlet. It's where they make area rugs. And so we're buying one for the new camera angles that we're going to have. We're buying, you know, just to look a little pretty. And so Astrid's were all looking at rugs. It's this huge room with all of these rugs. Some of them laying on these big tables, some of them hanging up on those big, you know, like, it looks like a picture book almost. You can move them and they do it.

[A]

Yeah, they move. They're hanging.

[B]

Yeah, they're hanging. And they're huge and they move. And you can, you know, pull them and then they open them up and see what they're looking like. So it's huge. It's empty. There's no one in there. There's like, maybe two other people in there and a couple of people who work there. And in the corner, they have this little house for the kids. Like a little playhouse for the kids, little play area for the kids, right? We've been there before. This is like the 18th rug we've bought because Blue manages to ruin every fucking rug that we have. And the prices are right. A couple hundred dollars for these huge rugs, and that's the right price when you have kids and. Or blue. Blue, because blue's gonna ruin it. You know, she is. Just don't spend a lot of money on it. So we go in here and, you know, the kids are kind of wound up. And so it's like, okay, let them run around and have Some fun. There's no one in here. Whatever. What can they do? They can't damage anything unless they decide to take a. On one of the carpets. Like, you know, and they're pretty good children in the first place, so they're not, you know, they're just running around having fun. So I'm at one end flipping through carpets, and my kid is at the other end. I see him running all the way to the other end. It's like football field long. Oh, yeah, building.

[A]

They're huge.

[B]

And I see him and he's like. He's so cute. One of my kids is so curious about everything. There's an office door that's open, and I can see him like. Like, kind of moving his way into the office, probably to get on the computer and Google, like, Disney cruise or something, right? Yeah, he wants to. He's. He's desperately trying.

[A]

Looking for a tv. A computer?

[B]

No, he's desperately trying to book himself on a Disney cruise. Every time I turn around, around, he's on the Disney cruise website, trying to figure out how he spends dad's credit card to get on one of those cruises. Which is cute, but it's annoying that. Hey, stop. Get off. Stop it. So he's at the other end and he's peering in. Yeah, he's peering in, and there's, you know, a couple people that have worked there are milling around. And I'm at the other end and I go, hey. Hey, you. Hey. Get out of there. Come here. Get over here. Get over here right now and get over here right. I'm just yelling that to them. And all of a sudden I see out of the corner, like, my peripheral vision, that someone is, like, running toward me. And I'm like, what's going on over there? And then I'm yelling, now, let's go. And this guy comes running up and he goes, yes, sir. Chrissy, I am dying a slow death inside. As I realized.

[A]

You thought he was calling me. You were calling him?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Get over here. No. Hey, stop that. Get over here. This guy. This guy had no idea. He thought I was yelling at him, and he come running over. He came running over and I was like, oh, my God, dude. Oh, my God. I go, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm so sorry. I was talking to my kid over there, and he's like, oh, that's all right, man. I thought you needed me. And I go. So I just was screaming. I'm so sorry. He's like, well, I just thought you needed something real quick. I was like, I need this.

[A]

No, get over here.

[B]

Get your ass over here right now. I never felt so embarrassed in my life. Meanwhile, my skin is falling off my bones. So I'm taking this, like, fluorosaurusil or whatever it is. I don't know. Have you ever taken this?

[A]

No. You were trying to tell me about it last week.

[B]

My stepmom was taking it too. It's called the orange. Oral? No, it's a cream. Oh, you couldn't eat. You couldn't do this. Oral.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. It will kill you. It's radiation. It's chemo for sunspots. Like when you have fair skin like I do, and yet you love to bake in the sun for hours at a time without sunscreen. Then as you age, you get these sunspots which are. Look like freckles, but they're not really freckles. They can have a little texture. Like they can just be a patch of rough skin. It's essentially a form of skin cancer that's not deadly like it does. It's not going to kill you. It's. But your cells get a little, like the skin gets a little rough. Just tiny little patches of rough. So you put this cream on your face for like, three or four weeks, depending how the doctor tells you to take it. And over the period of the first couple of days, it starts to get a little red. The spots start. It's amazing because it only targets those particular cells and it starts to get a little red. And then after a week or so of using it, all of the sudden your face is just, like, melting off. It looks like I have a terrible sunburn with blisters. That's what it looks like. And it's horrible and it feels really painful. And then it doesn't look great when you're staring up close. So you and I went to that meeting on Friday, and the first thing I wanted to say was, excuse my melting face. Excuse my melting.

[A]

I noticed you had a little something on your cheek there, but that's it. Yeah.

[B]

Other than that, now it's already starting to go away. It gets nasty, it gets really angry, and then it goes away. And when it goes away, you stop using it. Right. When it starts to heal itself, then you stop using it. Using it. But it's really. So anyway, so there I am standing there like this pockmart. Looked like I got beat up. Got, you know, like, just yelling at people in the empty warehouse. It was insane. Like, it was. I was just so upset. So we go, and then we go and we have some food at this barbecue place. Which is it, you're saying?

[A]

It was really delicious.

[B]

The smoking pig in Clemson. I'm gonna give them a shout out. The food there is just delicious. It's a great place.

[A]

Barbecue.

[B]

Yeah. They have all this. They have this huge yard out front with, like, these old. Old train containers, like shipping containers. And they have a bar. They have a couple bars outside. They have train container on top of train container. And then they have all this stuff for the kids and adults, which you see a lot of, like, the young, like, college kids are there, you know, drinking and playing.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Yeah. They have a big fire pit with, you know, going. So it's cold outside. And then they have all this stuff the kids can do. So we let them run around, and then you. You go and eat. And then they have this thing, which I just think. Think I thought about this. We've seen this so many different places, but now I think about it, it's brilliant. They let you take a permanent marker and write on the walls. Oh, and Nomad. Whatever you want to write, wherever you want to write it, on the. The decorations on the door sills, on the tables, on the chairs, wherever you can write.

[A]

Permanent marker.

[B]

Permanent marker.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So there are tens of thousands of names, little quips, little drawings all over the walls, up and down, in and out of this place. That's not that old. It's probably six or seven years old, this place. And so the kids start getting fascinated by this, and they want to write. I thought about this. It is entertainment. It will keep you coming back because, you know, you're like, next time you're in Clemson, you're like, let's go check out our signature. And then you never have to repaint the walls, you know, or. And it can hide any dirty spots that you have, either, right? Yeah. So the kids and I are writing out. You know, we're running all over the restaurant, writing stuff all over the place like a bunch of mor. Morons. And one of my daughters, the baby is. So we're eating at this table in this room. And then there's a table behind me, so. Or actually in front of me, behind Astrid, who's sitting facing me. And then the baby is sitting next to Astrid. Well, she's big enough to stand up, and she talks and walks and all that stuff. She stands up at the beginning of the meal. There's a table sitting there with three people who are just trying to enjoy their dinner. And the baby stands up, up and is staring directly at that table. Now, I love children. So if that was me on the other table, I would just have fun with this the entire meal. I would love it. Right? It would be great. But I think these people are kind of like, maybe they're in. Maybe they're having a conversation about something serious. Maybe this is like, not the time for them to play. I'm not saying that we're being dickish about it. They weren't. But you could tell that it was just getting a little bit annoying. But I could not convince my daughter to sit down and stand straight. She just kept on getting up and looking, not saying a word, just pants. Staring them down to the point. At one point, I noticed that one of the guys kind of turned his chair away from her. And I thought, my kid, this is trouble. Wherever we go. I'm yelling at kid. I'm yelling at everybody in the carpet place. Yeah. Now, you can't have a comfortable meal around my kids. They have this putt, putt out back. My kids are putting golf balls everywhere. They can't. Like in their pockets, in the. Their shirts. They're trying to steal the golf balls. I'm like, you can't do that.

[A]

This place sounds like a big playland.

[B]

It's love. It is. It's lovely. You gotta go. I mean, it's. I mean, if you ever go, you gotta go. It's. It's wonderful, the smoking.

[A]

I pass through there when I'm going up to Greenville.

[B]

Well, you should go stop by, Take the kid. The kids would love it. I mean, I know it's like a far drive to go just for a meal, but the kids would love it. I know they would.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Excuse me. I take my glasses off since my skin is literally growing in around them. Yes. It's melting. Melting. It's. It. Okay. This is the last two more days, and then I'm done with this because it's burning. It's really hurting at this point. But the funniest part about this, this night, which we just had a great night, then we went, we got some ice cream. And every, you know, 8 o' clock at night, kids are ready to go to bed. We pull up to my dad's place, which has a gate, and there's a couple gates. There's a couple gates there. It's one of those huge neighborhoods on a lake. And they. The front gate, which you have to go. You either have to call on the back gate or you have to go in through the front gate and check in with the security guard. But we have a pass so we usually go in the front gate. So we go into the front gate, and the guy is sitting in this security house, right? And he gets out and he. Yeah, the hut. That's right. Probably with a heater. A shitter.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it smells like Doritos. I can only imagine. Right. But listen, these guys are getting paid 15 an hour to basically not do it. I mean, who's he gonna stop people through? Yeah, who's really. Someone with bad intentions is really going to be stopped by a gunless security guard at a shitty little hut at the top of a hill. No, of course not. But he comes out. Guy I've seen a million times before. Like, you know, every time we go there, this guy's. At some point during the trip, this guy's checking us in or checking us out, and the guy is like, hey, y'. All. Y' all there for the RB and B? And I go, what? And he goes, y' all coming in for the R B? And I go, and no, no, I'm going to a different, different, different house. It's not an R bang bay, is it? And I go, RBB. RBB? What is RBB? And he goes, RB and B. You know, the RB and Bs, the ones you rant. And I go, airbnb. That's what I say, rbb. I'm like, rbb. What is it? Rp? This guy had that Southern accent where you almost can't understand what they're saying.

[A]

You can get into that in the Carolinas.

[B]

Yes, sure. In the Carolinas. There's some people who speak with that. Yeah, Air is R, and then, you know, bear is bar, so you don't understand a word. Chrissy. We were sitting there for, like, 30 seconds trying to misunderstand each other.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Our baby. And I'm like, arby's. Did he. I look at Astrid, I'm like, did he say Arby's? Oh, Astron is even more coolest, because if there's one thing that trips up Astrid, it's a Southern accent, I'm sure. Really trips Astrid up. She. If it's very thick, she has a really hard time. Fair enough. Like, if we go to certain places in Spain where the, like, where all of a sudden everything becomes a instead of a. It's really difficult to understand that Spanish. I already have a hard time doing it. Anyway, so this guy is RBBS US, like, for 30 straight seconds, and I'm like, I don't have any clue what's going on. But he was rbnbing us the Whole time. RB and B. There's a bar over there with the R B and bay. RB and B. RB and B, kids. Rb. That's the way it goes.

[A]

That's the new one.

[B]

Yeah. What'd you do this weekend?

[A]

Jeff and I had a little. Well, Friday night. We watched the fight, obviously, a little love making. Saturday we did. We had a date night.

[B]

We did.

[A]

We did.

[B]

Good for you guys.

[A]

We had a date night, went out to a fun dinner, got a little dressed up and enjoyed ourselves.

[B]

When was that? Saturday night.

[A]

Saturday night.

[B]

Oh, where'd you guys go?

[A]

Go? We went to Southern Bell.

[B]

What's Southern Bell? Never heard of that one.

[A]

Yeah, it's down there in my, you know, little bubble of. Of downtownness.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. You don't know. At a meeting outside the perimeter, which is the perimeter, the 285 that circles the town. It's a highway. That's just a circle. That's all it is. And Chrissy had to go just outside the perimeter for a meeting the other day.

[A]

Fish out of water.

[B]

She didn't know what to do. She was like, do I need a pass?

[A]

Where am I?

[B]

Yeah, she had. She. She brought her passport check into the restaurant with their passport.

[A]

Well, we've got such great restaurants downtown that we kind of just tend to stay in that little zone, which I think a lot of people do in Atlanta. Stay in their zone, no matter where that is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just because the traffic is crazy and you can't just. There's so much new stuff all over, you can't try it all.

[B]

Yeah. I am not snobbish one way or the other. I get it. Like, there's some people who live outside the perimeter who won't go inside the perimeter. It's the same way. It's otp. Itp. I don't play that game. Like, whatever, wherever it is. And I've lived downtown and I've lived outside the perimeter. I've lived in every part of this town. I've had 34 different residences because no one wants me.

[A]

We have.

[B]

Yeah, no one wants me or you. But Southern Belle. Was it good? What kind of food was it?

[A]

It was really good. Well, it was Southern inspired.

[B]

Go figure.

[A]

And, yeah, it was just. It was lovely food. I, you know. Sal, Fried green tomatoes.

[B]

Some love me a fried. Good fried green tomato.

[A]

Yeah. There was a pasta dish. I don't know. It was. It was delicious and the atmosphere was lovely. It's right there next to the Landmark theater. So. In that plaza, Druid Hills area. No, no, I'm Sorry, not the Landmark Theater, but the Plaza Theater.

[B]

Oh, the Plaza Theater.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Got it off ponce. Right. I used to live right there. I lived right there. I walked there all the time. Is that. Is opera diem still there there?

[A]

Yeah. Well, that's over by the Trader Joe's.

[B]

Okay. Yeah, yeah, that's on the other side. That's over by the Trader Joe's. Wow. Lovely. Good for you. Congratulations. Little love making with Jeff. Congratulations to Jeff.

[A]

Jeff.

[B]

Congratulations, Jeff.

[A]

Then we watched football yesterday.

[B]

Oh, you did? Yeah. Jeff says, blew off a little steam. Congratulations to Jeff. Watched a little football yesterday. Watch football on Saturday. Yeah, I watched football on Saturday and.

[A]

It was a big Tennessee Georgia game, which Tennessee lost.

[B]

They did. They didn't. Georgia looked really good in that game. But, yeah, so I. I told my dad, I go, oh, the Georgia game's on, dad. We should watch it. And he go, I didn't know you liked football. I didn't know you even understood what football was. And I was like, yeah, dad, every once in a while I watch football. And he's like, ah, go, I don't watch. Whatever. He didn't believe me. Even my dad doesn't think I'm a man. He's like, ah, whatever.

[A]

Hi, Brian.

[B]

What can you do? I'm just a boy. Just a boy trying to learn the world.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

All right.

[A]

You're doing a good job.

[B]

Thank you. All right, well, it's Wednesday, and now that we've talked about our everything from the weekend for the weekend, we gotta understand that's how we record. Thanks to Ron. Funches for bunches and bunches of funches is. Here it is. Ron was great.

[A]

He was.

[B]

He is great. I do love me some Ron. Everybody had told us how wonderful Ron was and not. It wasn't even pretend. Not true. It was like, so true. It wasn't even funny.

[A]

Was a lot more intellectual than I would have thought. And I liked it.

[B]

Yeah, I just thought he was a very sweet man. I. He was really nice. And you could not believe how excited my kids were when I told them. I talked to Cooper from the Trolls. Oh, my God, they were through the room. Anyway, no, go check out all of Ron's stuff. There's links in the show, notes from Tuesdays. Check out the Office lady, now available on the Odyssey app. Wherever you get your podcasts. Congratulations to their new new deal with Odyssey. Hopefully we'll sign a new deal with Odyssey similar to the Office ladies very soon.

[A]

Oh, yeah, we've got to.

[B]

I don't know how much they got paid. But I think we're worth quite a little bit more actually. Yeah, we put out three times as.

[A]

Much content if they do or anyone.

[B]

Else, or anyone else in the entire podcast landscape. There you go. All right. TCB podcast.com that's where you go for more information about the show. You get all the audio and all the video right there, one location. And you get your free TCB bumper sticker. All you got to do is hit the contact us button, drop down menu. I want my free sticker. Give us your physical address and away it will go. Pretty soon every episode of the commercial break will be available on YouTube. Congratulations. We'll let you know when that is, but we're gonna get back to it. For a while there we had a streak there for about four months where we had every episode up there but for various different reasons it didn't work out. But here we are back again, doing it again. So.

[A]

And Spotify stuff, right?

[B]

We're going to be putting all of our videos on Spotify sooner rather than later. I will let you know when that happens. We're right now we're peppering some videos in there to test it and as soon as we can get it worked out, then I'll let you know. And all the videos will be available on Spotify at the commercial break on Instagram tcb podcast on tick tock YouTube.com the commercial break 2124333 tcb okay Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for right now.

[A]

I think so.

[B]

But I'll tell you that I love you and I love you best you best to you, best you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I do say, we will say and we must say goodbye. Save that.