Let's Be Nosy!

Summary

The Commercial Break: “Let’s Be Nosy!” (Feb 28, 2024) — Detailed Episode Summary

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Episode Overview

In “Let’s Be Nosy!”, Bryan Green and guest co-host Christina (editor-in-chief, standing in for regular co-host Krissy, who’s on vacation) serve up their signature improv-comedy banter. The episode meanders through internet oddities, contemporary dating drama (especially the sinister side of dating apps like Hinge), musings on modern romance, run clubs, and a healthy dose of behind-the-scenes podcast Q&A. As ever, Bryan and Christina inject irreverent humor and self-aware commentary on pop culture and the chaos of everyday life, blending listener questions with personal anecdotes and a touch of earnest cultural critique.

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Main Topics & Key Discussion Points

1. Lawsuit Against Match Group & The Gamification of Modern Dating

• (01:27) Christina shares a story about a class-action lawsuit targeting Match Group (owners of Tinder, Hinge, Match.com) for allegedly predatory, manipulative, and addictive app designs.
• The lawsuit claims Hinge’s “Designed to be deleted” slogan is false, accusing the app of intentionally locking users in a “pay-to-play loop.”
• Commentary on “rose jail” (premium in-app currency required for meaningful matches), with Christina describing the process as “socially embarrassing.” (04:01)
• They debate whether the legal system can do anything about the addictive gamification seen in both dating apps and broader internet society.
  • Quote (Bryan, 05:09): “The gamification of everything is happening...and there is a price to be paid.”

2. The Real Value (and Absurdity) of Premium Dating Features

• (08:34) Christina balks at Hinge’s $49.99/month subscription cost: “I wouldn’t even pay that to go to a gym, babe.”
• Bryan jokes that people will pay for streaming services and whack off instead—“I could pay for all the streaming apps, whack off and never have another date.” (08:48)
• Discussion on pre-COVID dating apps vs. post-COVID monetization strategies, and how the user experience has shifted from free and open to paywalled and frustrating.

3. Alternatives to the Dating App Grind – Social Clubs & “Nosy Matchmakers”

• Christina details her burgeoning membership in “run clubs” as a healthier, more natural way to meet people.
• (09:56) Anecdotes about couples who successfully met on online dating platforms prior to their paywall-heavy redesigns.
• The duo exchanges nostalgia for the times when friends would organically “set each other up.”
  • Quote (Bryan, 24:53): “I think the world needs more nosy aunt matchmakers. Do you know what I’m saying?”
  • Christina: “The best way to go on dates is to have people set you up with their friends.” (25:07)
  • Bryan: “Friends need to be nosier in our lives...we can’t let them succumb to the Hinge trap of consumerism dating.” (25:16)
• Lighthearted but genuine frustration with dating apps creating artificial friction for social profit.

4. Musings on Run Clubs, Slow Runners & Social Dynamics

• Christina recounts being the “slow” runner in her club (“I have been humbled. I am not fast. I am, in fact, very slow.” 16:55).
• Stories about the different support levels among run club groups and the experience of being left behind (17:04).
• Discussions about “ideal running form,” barefoot running “foot gloves,” and bonding while running at a conversational pace.
  • Bryan: “You should run at a pace where you can talk the entire time.” (23:39)

5. “Ask TCB” Listener Q&A Segment

• (29:21) Bryan and Christina dive into a variety of listener mail, offering both comedic and sincere takes:

A. The Slow-Mo Sex Relationship Conundrum

• Listener writes in about dating a guy who’s eager to go slow—emotionally and sexually—even though they’re spending most nights together and meeting families. No sex (except oral for her), no clear communication.
• Christina: “He’s not giving you a reason why...for me, couldn’t fall in love with someone without...making sure.” (34:11)
• Bryan’s advice: “It’s ultimatum time...You either have to tell me what’s up or no more getting around it...because it’s about your comfort level too.” (38:24)
• The hosts stress the need for open communication and the willingness to walk away if compatibilities aren’t aligned.

B. Ghosts, Teresa Caputo, and the Afterlife (40:30)

• A listener asks if Bryan “believes in ghosts,” or if he’s just “shitting on the whole thing” due to his critiques of celebrity psychic Teresa Caputo.
• Bryan: “I don’t not believe in ghosts. I’m just open to the idea that anything is possible. But Teresa Caputo is not the person getting these messages.” (43:05)
• Christina: “We will roast her until she’s off the air.” (42:16)

C. Podcast Numbers & Business Transparency

• Commonly asked: “Do you really have no listeners?”
• Bryan: “Of course we have listeners. It’s Christina, my wife, and my father. Those are our three listeners.” (44:02, joking)
• Actual size discussed only in relative, not absolute, terms; clear pride in a loyal, if niche, audience, and frankness about being “just fine” and not widely recognized.

D. Behind the Scenes — Ads, Sponsors & Show Production

• Why fewer ads? A combo of technical, back-end decisions and the desire for a better listening experience.
• Sponsors sometimes send free products, but endorsement is honest; favorite sponsors mentioned include Rocket Money, Magic Spoon, and Travelocity.
• Christina: “I use Rocket Money and I really like them.” (54:00)
• On coming up with episode content: “It’s not as much work as you might think...it’s like bar talk with a best friend that drifts wherever the night takes it.” (49:41)

E. Dream Guests & Favorite Episodes

• Top past guest favorites: Felicia Day, Heather McMahon, Joanna Hausmann (“three-way tie”). (56:04)
• Dream guest: Conan O’Brien (specifically called out by Bryan).
• Christina cheekily claims her favorite guest moment is herself (55:47).

F. The Roe v. Wade & Alabama Embryo Ruling Discussion

• (63:22) Listeners request their take—prompting a rare, serious political segment:
  • Both hosts firmly advocate for reproductive rights: “The moment that I get a vagina and a uterus, I will start having a strong opinion about this. But until then, it is a woman’s right to do whatever it is she chooses with her own body.” (63:23)
  • Christina: “If you’re voting Republican, you’re truly just voting against people...it’s just insane.” (64:51)
  • Bryan sums up: “If you’re going to be a pro-lifer, then do it from conception to grave—you cannot sit there and be a pro-lifer and vote down penalty.” (65:24)
• Express frustration over hypocrisy in politics and the exclusion of women from decisions about their own bodies.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• (04:01) Bryan (on “rose” feature in Hinge): “You have to give a rose to somebody to get their attention...it’s like a special item...but socially embarrassing.”
• (08:48) Bryan: “I could pay for all the streaming apps, whack off and never have another date...for $49.99 a month.”
• (24:53) Bryan: “I think the world needs more nosy aunt matchmakers.”
• (25:14) Christina: “The best way to go on dates is to have people set you up with their friends.”
• (38:24) Bryan (to listener on relationship issues): “This is ultimatum time...be ready for the conclusion [he doesn’t want to have sex with you].”
• (43:05) Bryan (on ghosts): “I don’t not believe in ghosts...I’m open to the idea that anything is possible. But Teresa Caputo is not the person getting these messages.”
• (44:02) Bryan, joking: “Of course we have listeners. It’s Christina, my wife, and my father.”
• (54:00) Christina: “I use Rocket Money and I really like them.”
• (63:23) Bryan (on Roe v. Wade and Alabama embryo ruling): “The moment that I get a vagina and a uterus, I will start having a strong opinion about this. But until then, it is a woman’s right to do whatever it is she chooses with her own body.”
• (66:52) Christina: “The only other thing I will say about it is about all the IVF stuff...all these Republicans then were walking back their word, trying to be like, ‘we are strongly for IVF’...and it’s all bullshit.”

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:27 — Hinge lawsuit / Match Group predatory practices
• 04:01 — “Rose jail” and embarrassment of app features
• 08:34–09:15 — Outrage over Hinge’s $49.99/mo fee
• 09:36–12:41 — The rise of “run clubs” and alternate ways to socialize
• 24:53–25:45 — The pros of nosy friendship matchmaking
• 29:21–41:29 — Ask TCB Q&A, including the “no sex” relationship letter
• 43:05 — On ghosts, Teresa Caputo, and skepticism
• 44:02–45:47 — Podcast listener metrics and business
• 49:41 — Content creation behind the scenes
• 54:00 — Favorite sponsors & Rocket Money endorsement
• 56:04 — Favorite guests and dream interviews
• 63:22–68:02 — Discussion on Roe v. Wade, abortion rights, politics
• 69:28–end — Show closing, how to interact/participate

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Episode Tone & Language

• Irreverent, snarky, honest, tangential, occasionally earnest
• Openly self-deprecating about podcast size, celebrity status, and cultural relevance
• Freely uses current slang (“slay queen,” “get your nut,” “handy J”) with a wink, and maintains a casual, unfiltered conversational style

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For Listeners New and Old

Whether you’re here for cringe dating app stories, hot takes on modern romance, raw opinions on women’s rights, or just unfiltered friendship banter, this episode is peak TCB: a cheesecake-factory sampler of humor, pop culture, and real talk. If you’ve never tuned in before, you’ll get their essence: honest, out-there, with a low B.S. bar, and always a casual, rowdy, and deeply human escape from everyday life.

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Best to you, and best to you out there in the podcast universe!

Transcript

[A]

Every day at least 50 times, I say, well, this can't be. And then to my shock and dismay, it continues being. And I've just been wondering when something is going to be done about that.

[B]

On this episode of the commercial break.

[A]

I'm thinking in my later 20s, have I, like, met someone out and then gone on a few dates with them? I don't think so.

[B]

Here is. This is. I was explaining this to somebody a couple days ago. I think the world needs more nosy ant matchmakers. Do you know what I'm saying?

[A]

Absolutely. I said this the other day.

[B]

Nosy matchmakers. Yes.

[A]

We are one woman. I love that.

[B]

Go queen.

[A]

I slay queen.

[B]

Go slay queen. Go queen. Get off on it. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Yeah, boy. Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green and this is our editor in chief, Christina. Christina, best to you.

[A]

Best to you, man.

[B]

Best to you. Out there in the podcast universe, I always wondered if it was editor and chief or editor in chief. And then, yeah, you just got to read the actual. Read it on msnbc. Editor in chief. I don't know what that means, but, you know, I'll roll with it because they say it's official. She's the chief editor. She's the chief editor in charge. She's the chief in charge.

[A]

Oh, you're damn right I am.

[B]

Oh, yes. Christina was just reading me a very. And telling me about a very interesting story. Now, maybe not relevant to those of us who are old and marri. That may be more relevant to those of us who are young and single. Christina, do tell about the Hinge lawsuit because I'm very interested. I have a lot to say about this.

[A]

There is a little. There's a little lawsuit flying around against the Match Group, which is like tinder, match.com and hinge.

[B]

I didn't realize that they owned so many of them until you started telling me this story. I mean, I think I did know that Match owned Tinder, but I didn't realize they owned hinge. Match.com it's.

[A]

I don't know. It's crazy there. So basically I'm reading from the Washington Post, just so you guys know, but it says there's a class action lawsuit filed February 14th. Six dating app users accused Match Group of having a predatory business model and deliberately employing psychologically manipulative features to ensure they remain on the app perpetually as paying subscribers.

[B]

No shit.

[A]

And they're saying it violates consumer protection laws because it intentionally designs the platforms with addictive game like design features which lock users into a perpetual pay to play loop that prioritizes corporate profits over its marketing promises and customers relationship goals. And further later on it goes to.

[B]

Say one to say something about like false advertising.

[A]

That's. Yeah, it's just further down in the article. So it says. The lawsuit also accused Match of violating laws on false advertising and defective design, saying its apps are trying to entrench users on the app and prioritizing profits over marketing promises because their entire thing especially hinges slogan is designed to be deleted. But they accuse the app of inspiring users to do the opposite.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

It's true.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

My experience, that's true.

[B]

Well, your experience says a lot because you came on and told us about this. You said that Hinge puts people in rose jail, quote unquote jail. Let me repeat for those who don't know what Christina was talking about. I don't know, 40 episodes ago at this point, 700 episodes ago, years ago. Yeah, she's on Hinge. And in order to communicate with some people or to let them know that you're thinking about them, I guess to get ahead of the line, you would send them a rose of which you're allowed one per week. Correct. And then that rose indicates that you're the cream of the crop, you're the best of the bunch. You've given your rose to somebody. It's like a special item you give to them to let them know you're at the top of their list.

[A]

Right. I assume also like socially embarrassing.

[B]

Totally, completely. Like you have to give a rose to somebody to get their attention. Or is it that you get the.

[A]

Roses and that's that you get the roses by paying. It's like, oh, if you're paying for this.

[B]

Yeah, if you're paying for this, then the indication would be. Or maybe the stereotype would be what a loser. Why are you paying for embarrassing? Okay, gotcha. You know, I, I shared this and I'll share it now is that I believe that there is not legally a lot of water to hold here. Like, I think that this happens. The gamification of everything is happening. This is essentially a social media company and even though dating is their game, that's it's a social media and social media has been gamified forever and ever likes, hearts, dislikes, when that was a thing. You know, you don't pay for those things, but they are social currency in a way. And I don't that Hinge is doing anything illegal, immoral maybe, but an Embarrassing, probably. And absolutely, you know, making dating tough on everybody. Yes. But is it illegal? Probably not. Because when you think about it, like I was giving this example, you go to Disney World, in every commercial that you see for Disney World, these people are running around the park without anybody around them. There's like 30 people in the entirety of Magic Kingdom and they're getting on every ride and they're having a magical day and they're looking at the fireworks right from the front of the castle and no one's crying and no one is crying. And if you have ever been to Disney World or any Disney related park, or any theme park for that matter, then you know, that is horse shit. They are going to charge you $700 to get in you and your family, $700 just to get in the park. And then they're going to make you pay additional money to get to the front of the line. And everybody who's standing in the line looks at those assholes and goes, what? What? Huh? What happened there? And then everybody who is in the line, the FastPass line may feel one of two things. Either fools for not paying, you know, where's your pocketbook? Or number two, I'm embarrassed that I'm getting in front of all these people who have been standing in line for four hours. The gamification of everything is happening and there is a price to be paid. So is it illegal? No. False advertising maybe?

[A]

That's what I'm going to say. I was going to say, I think the false advertising thing is really where they actually have a shot. Because I, I mean I've been complaining about this for years that their slogan is designed to be deleted. And I think they're full of shit.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because they literally like, they won't show you the people who you are most likely to connect with based on their algorithm. They will not them to you unless you pay for it.

[B]

Well, now that is false advertising.

[A]

You have one chance to send a rose. But like the thing is, I mean sending a rose is embarrassing anyway. But like, at least in my, in my view, I'm sure a lot of.

[B]

Other people feel the same way.

[A]

But that's personal to me. But like if you have to pay to see the people in your standouts in rose jail who are your most compatible or your most likely to be in your league to like people to like you or whatever, if you have to pay to see them, then it's not designed to be deleted. It's designed for you to pay for it. Yeah, well, which is like bullshit. So it is bullshit.

[B]

And now listen, okay, so this is like, this is consumerism at its finest, right? It is essentially, I give you stage capitalism. Yeah. I give you the teat, but the milk will not come until you pay, until you bite off on putting your credit card down. And this is what always happens with everything, right? We all got on Facebook and then Facebook inundated us with advertisements and misinformation and, you know, propaganda from nation states, third world nation states. I mean that's. And that's the way it always happens. You get hooked on the free, you pay for the better. And this is the way consumerism has been working forever and ever and ever, and especially in the age of the Internet, when essentially their game is, is showing you who you could potentially be matched with. They're in their minds and their shareholders minds. Why wouldn't we charge you extra to be then? Okay, so, but when you're telling people that this is what's going to happen regardless if you pay or not paying gives you some additional perks. But regardless, we're going to make sure that you get the people that you're intended to be hooked up with. And they purposely behind the scenes withhold until you do pay. And then when you do pay, it's a much better experience. And you're like, well, fuck, I guess I have to pay next month too. Then you're like, I have to pay next month too.

[A]

So also like the, the chart that the actual money is ridiculous.

[B]

49. 99amonth money.

[A]

So much money. I wouldn't even pay that to go to a gym, babe.

[B]

No.

[A]

And I could meet people there.

[B]

No, this is, this is like 4990 month is.

[A]

That's like, girl, get a grip, sister.

[B]

I could pay for all the streaming apps, whack off and never have another date. And I would be happy for 49.99amonth. That's a lot of money. That's a lot of fucking money. Can you imagine PCB tried to charge.

[A]

Somebody, oh my God, you guys wouldn't even get $5 a month on Patreon.

[B]

We couldn't get a $99 a month when we did it. We couldn't get a dollar 99amonth. I mean, come on. 49.99.

[A]

In what world? Like, are they crazy?

[B]

They are crazy. That's the thing is that they have this product that everybody's hooked on and they know that you're not going to tear yourself away from it because it's one of the only ways that people meet each other in romantic or potentially romantic situations these days. Scary. The world is a big, bad, ugly place. After Covid, I'm not sure anybody has left their house.

[A]

Run club.

[B]

Run club. Are you in a run club?

[A]

I'm in two run clubs.

[B]

Oh, cool. I like the idea of a run club, actually. I think that's cool. I saw.

[A]

Yeah. I'm in so many clubs right now.

[B]

You should be. That's a good thing.

[A]

Well, I'm trying to be very social. I'm trying to expand my circle, if you will.

[B]

I met a couple yesterday and they were married for, I don't know, a decade or something. They. They met on one of the, you know, match on eharmony. One of those. I forgot which one it was. But one of the ones that's been around for a while. I have friends, I have family members who have met on those and are married still to this day. There are. There are love stories to be had inside of these applications, and there are people who meet and then really fall in love. That's right. If you have the 49.99 to pay. That's insane. That's insane.

[A]

Paying for dates. But that's not something I'm in the business of doing.

[B]

Yeah, okay, fair enough. But like match match.com and eharmony.com and those other ones, they've always been paid services. I believe it's just Tinder and Hinge and. Okay, Cupid and some eharmony.

[A]

You know what you're getting into.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

But with Hinge and Tinder and Bumble, they did not start that way. And, like, we all have been using them since they started.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the people who, like, actually who I know, who've been married or been in relationships that started on those apps started before their algorithms started getting predatory. They're all people who met, like, before COVID on the apps where this.

[B]

Go ahead, Go ahead. No, go ahead, please finish your sentence.

[A]

I was just going to say anyone who's met after, or anyone who's been using it, like, post Covid is like, what the fuck is this?

[B]

Yeah. Was it better pre Covid or during COVID Why? Because it was absolutely free. There was no roses. You just did your thing.

[A]

There was probably, like, some cost. But it wasn't. It wasn't like it is now. It was like you had a lot more like 2018, 2019. It was way more just like regular dating app.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like you were just swiping through people, seeing what you liked. You're the people who would, like, you were in your purview. So, like, there was no issue in getting to the people. The problem is now you go on hinge and you can't even get to.

[B]

People who you like because they're hiding them behind a paywall, essentially. Yeah, yeah. Like I do understand, like I'm, I'm not, you know, I'm not on the side of corporate entities every time, but I do understand that this, the AI technology that they use, the huge amount of data and servers that they use, the complicated machinery that is connecting someone with an other people they like based on their preferences and who they've chosen in the past, that's expensive stuff. And so you got to pay for it somehow. And okay, I'll get ads. That's it. That's what I'm like.

[A]

Do advertisement.

[B]

Well, you know, you say do advertisements and I agree with you. Do advertisements, right. Every third swipe, or every fifth swipe or every tenth swipe, you have to watch a 30 second commercial, right?

[A]

You do get ads on Bumble sometimes.

[B]

Oh, you do?

[A]

I think it's ads. Sometimes I swipe through and I'm like, what? And it comes up with something else.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then I'm like, oh. And then I just kind of swipe.

[B]

Past, just do it like Instagram and allow the users to pay to have their. Their shown. More like an ad. But it says sponsored, right? Or it says paid for, you know?

[A]

Yeah, that's what I want to see.

[B]

Listen, when I was a young man, many decades ago, many hundreds of decades ago, I do remember when I was A young man, 42, long before the wheel was invented, in 1777, back when, back when Antarctica was. Was green. Which is weird. I watched this. Anyway, I'm not gonna get into it, but I do remember that there were often, and I say often, probably twice a year when you would listen to the local radio stations, news stories about a gentleman who would put his advertisement, his classified ad for himself, right? His, his essentially dating profile up on a billboard somewhere in Atlanta or around, I'm not even kidding. And they would do this usually around Valentine's Day. It was like a Valentine's Day Christmas type thing. And they would always have these like, you know, human interest stories where guys would be putting their selves up on a billboard and saying, you know, I'm single, ready to mingle. I'm six foot two. I'm 110, whatever it was. 110 pounds, six foot two. That's really skinny. Ye.

[A]

Incredible, incredible work.

[B]

Tiny. Tiny. You're just tiny. You can't get a date because you look like a boner.

[A]

Like a pencil even. Like billboards are expensive.

[B]

They are expensive. But I mean, 49.99amonth times five years, right?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You could probably get a billboard for 3,000 bucks. So here's what I'm saying is that like, it's just like, I don't know if you've noticed this about Instagram and we are as guilty of this as anybody. When we have a good clip, sometimes we boost it. But now I'm noticing that the most ridiculous of things are getting boosted. Like, hi, I'm Dave and I like, I play guitar for the last three weeks and here's my music. It's like, good for you, Dave. You should put yourself out there. I agree with that. Go for it. You got $10 to waste. Go do it, dude. Shoot your shot. Got it. Get it. Oh my God. But can the apps also work this way where like, if you really want to get in front of additional people, just have an ad, but let the gut, let someone pay for it individually on a one off basis. Like, okay, I'm going to put my profile out there for the next three weeks. It's going to cost me 100 bucks and then I'm going to get shown to not just people that I like, but everybody in my area. Right. Or at least as many people as $100 pays. That's a more, I think transparent way to do this, is allow somebody to boost themselves.

[A]

And I think so too.

[B]

Yeah. And then let the marketplace decide whether or not that's something interesting. And in my opinion, if you tell people that you're going connect them no matter what for free, we're going to get you, we got you covered. And then, but if you really want us to get your back, if you really want the full service experience, go ahead and pay 49.99amonth. That's bringing you in. And then it's, it's just by hook or by crook. And I understand the position that match.com is in. They have to make money. They can't do this for free. But at the same time, I do agree that like switch bait and switching all of a sudden is probably a shitty thing to do. This is not going to be, this is not going to hold weight legally, I guarantee you, unless they have false advertising and that can be false advertising.

[A]

Thing might, but we'll see.

[B]

But here's where it's really going to hurt. I think there's two things that are going to happen. Number one, a larger conversation about what it is to find a romantic partner in the year 2024. And number two, more conversation and scrutiny around these dating apps, which can leave a lot of people miserable. A lot of people miserable. I mean, isn't it just fucking suck to be single in 2024?

[A]

I mean, no.

[B]

Okay. All right. And maybe I'm wrong, but, like, that's.

[A]

Part of the reason I feel like why I don't really use the apps anymore is because I'm like, my life is fabulous.

[B]

Yeah. And you got the run Club. Like, you guys at the Run Club or girls. You guys are girls. You're in two run clubs. Your odds are for you.

[A]

Right now. Here's the problem. Coming back from a knee surgery, right? I have been humbled. I have been humbled. I am not fast. I am, in fact, very slow. And the last time I went to the run club.

[B]

Are you, like, the slowest out there?

[A]

I went to the run club. I lost them.

[B]

Yeah, they. They all. They all ran faster than you. Everyone. Whoop. Ran away.

[A]

See, See, the first. The first time I went to the run Club, there was someone. They were, like, sending people back to us to, like, check on us.

[B]

Oh, make sure that. How nice of them.

[A]

And it was so sweet. It was honestly, like, it was a little bit patronizing, but I personally loved it. Yes. Slay, like, coach me. And they were being so encouraging. And, like, I just want to chat when I run, so it was great to have someone to, like. Like, you know, chat with, whatever. And my friend, she was struggling a little bit more, and so she couldn't chat as much as I wanted to, obviously. So then this time we go. And there was a different. Like, it was mostly a pretty different group of people, and it was a different, like, leader. And there was no one coming back to check that we were still with.

[B]

No. They were like, fuck that.

[A]

So we were. We were on our own little ride.

[B]

But when you say we, was it, like, you were with a slower group?

[A]

I had a friend come with me.

[B]

Oh, that was nice of her to stay with you.

[A]

We're both slow, and so it was just two of us basically running the whole time. But then we got back to the coffee shop after, like, where we were like, the Run Club is sponsored by.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And we all get, like, free coffee. And so then we hung out with the group a little bit there. But it's a little bit of a shame for me right now because I'm just not fast.

[B]

I get it. I get it.

[A]

But look, if you guys want to join A slow runners run club.

[B]

Now let me ask you a question. If you could pay 49, 99amonth and get someone to push you in a wheelchair with the fast people, would you do that?

[A]

No.

[B]

I guess that defeats the purpose of run club, huh?

[A]

Yeah, well, we'll see. I'm joining a trail running club, so we'll see what happens there. Because you kind of have to go. They said there's a slow group there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I was like, cool.

[B]

Trail running, you got to take it easy. You have to take it easy.

[A]

Yeah, you have to go slow. You can't go fast. You can trip. And I am delicate.

[B]

You're like a, I see you a delicate flower over there. You know me, if I'm an enterprising single young man and I'm attracted to somebody, you know what I'm doing? I'm keeping up pace with them. Slower, faster, whatever. I mean, I'm not a fast runner either. I like to run, but I, I don't run at any pace. I mean, I'm really, really slow. But I'm old. I want to take it easy. I'm not looking for new hips. No, I'm not looking for a new hip at 50, which one of my uncles had. My uncle had like, he had to get his hip replaced at 50 because he was running all the time. Like every morning, every night he would be out running and the doctor was like, you got to stop it. You're killing your hips. And it's a terrible, terrible. Running is eventually a terrible thing on your body. Unless you're from one of those tribes somewhere who ran across the desert for days on end.

[A]

So good at running.

[B]

Yeah, they're so good at running.

[A]

But that's like, they say like you are, are supposed to run. Like that's like ideal running form. Like what the people, those people would do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So it's like very like small steps.

[B]

That's what I do. Yeah.

[A]

So people, when they're like super fast like you and bouncing up and down a lot when they're running, I'm sitting there judging, going. They are expending way too much energy. You know what, I could do this for 25 miles.

[B]

It's crazy. So I had been running for like when I first started running a decade ago, let's say I couldn't run a quarter of a mile without completely being out of air. But I was also just had quit smoking cigarettes. So I think that had something to do with it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's part of. I had never conditioned my body to do this. And so then I started gaining some stamina. And I was up to a mile and then 2 miles and then I was doing 5k every single day. And that didn't take long to do that. That was like, maybe like a six month period. Right where I finally was like built.

[A]

I mean, when you truly work on it, it comes.

[B]

But I had been running at the same particular place almost every morning or when I ran and I would run around the. And I noticed that there was a gentleman older. I know, but I liked it, so. Yeah, but you get addicted to it.

[A]

Same time every day. A woman never.

[B]

Well, listen, I don't think. No offense to myself, but I think this is the guy anybody's looking to. Sex traffic. I'm just saying I think there are better options out there.

[A]

Maybe. Maybe you're the scary one on the trail.

[B]

Maybe you never know. What does a bad guy look like? I'm not sure. So just a guy. I had. No. Yeah, just a dude. Thanks.

[A]

I'm a delicate flower.

[B]

You are a delicate flower. So I had noticed this guy was running. He was a little bit older than me and he was running too, but he was running different than I was running. I was running the, you know, American way you learn in school where you're just clod hopping around, is bouncing up and down and fast as you can. Yeah. But I had noticed this guy and he was running like, almost like he was walking really fast, very smooth, very small steps, arms not swinging all over the place wildly.

[A]

Ideal form or.

[B]

Ideal form. And so I started fashioning my run after this guy because I noticed that what he was doing. So then I. My friend goes, one of my friends who also runs says, you gotta read this book on running. Right. He started running barefoot, like in these barefoot shoes. Do you know what I'm talking about? Those ridiculous things that people wear. Yeah.

[A]

That's what I like to call a red flag.

[B]

Totally. Why are you wearing. Why are you wearing foot gloves to run?

[A]

Little like.

[B]

Yes, the foot gloves.

[A]

They actually have socks also that are like toe socks or running. They're like ninja or something.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

But I imagine that that's actually pretty good for your toes.

[B]

It probably is, but I just can't do it.

[A]

Too much self respect.

[B]

Yeah, me too. I'm just like, I don't care. I'm married. No one's looking. I'm not looking for anybody. No one's looking for me. But I'm embarrassed by the foot sock. Like, I just don't want to do that. Yeah. Anyway, so he Said, you got to read this book. Like, he sends it to me on Amazon. I start reading it. You know what? The guy is one of these runners who ran across the desert from this particular tribe. Like, he wrote, wrote this book. And he said it's not about extending effort. It's about being in the pocket. You get comfortable with a small, steady pace, and you just sit there. Your breathing is comfortable, your arms are comfortable, your legs are moving, like almost gliding across the. You know, don't. Yeah, pull your knees up toward your chest.

[A]

My own little slow runner.

[B]

Good for you. This is.

[A]

I want to be able to run where I can talk the entire time. Well, I want to talk at you for the two and a half hours we are running this half marathon. I want to be chatting the entire time.

[B]

You know what it says in the book?

[A]

Podcast.

[B]

You know what it says in the book? It says you should run at a pace where you can talk the entire time.

[A]

That's really good for cardiovascular health.

[B]

Yeah, listen, you're not getting an argument for me, but here's the question. Bringing it back around. Here's the question. Like, do you. The less rely on the apps and more lie on social media interactions in order to find romantic partners or potential romantic partners?

[A]

My goal this year.

[B]

Good.

[A]

I, like, I think I want to not use the apps and I want to try and meet people in real life.

[B]

I think.

[A]

I don't think I've ever been out on a date from, like, meeting someone organically. No, I'm trying to think. I don't know.

[B]

You never been like a.

[A]

Like a. Oh, no, that's not true. That's not true.

[B]

You had to have met somebody in school or something. Like.

[A]

Yeah, well, I was thinking, like, after school, but then again, I did meet someone, like, after college who, like, I went out with, like, a few years later or whatever.

[B]

But okay, that's organic.

[A]

Like, I'm thinking in my later 20s, have I, like, met someone out and then gone on a few dates with them? I don't think so.

[B]

Here is. This is. I was explaining this to somebody a couple days ago. I think the world needs more nosy and matchmakers. Do you know what I'm saying?

[A]

I said this.

[B]

Nosy matchmakers. Yeah.

[A]

We are one woman. I love that.

[B]

Go queen.

[A]

I slay queen.

[B]

Slay queen. Coin. Get off on it.

[A]

No, I literally said this the other day. I was like, the best way to go on dates is to have people set you up with their friends.

[B]

Totally agree.

[A]

Other people, they know. That's.

[B]

That's it you, our friends need to be more nosy in our lives. We can't let them. We can't let them get succumbed to the hinge trap of consumerism dating. What we need to do is just have more nosy fucking friends. That's what we need.

[A]

Be nosier.

[B]

Hey, I noticed you haven't gotten laid in a while. There's this cute girl that I know and she's. She's probably crazy, but so are you. So the two of you ought to go out on a date. And hey, maybe you can get a hand job out of it. Maybe she gets off to everybody's having a good time, Go for it. And that's it.

[A]

Do you want to know something awful about hand jobs? Just I heard someone the other day refer to a hand job as a handy J.

[B]

A handy J.

[A]

A handy J.

[B]

Well, that's just. That's new lows. You got to call.

[A]

I was like, I'm going to barf.

[B]

I think. Yeah, it's called a hand shandy. Thank you very much. Let's all settle down.

[A]

Where I heard that Run Club.

[B]

Run Club. That's where all the bullshit is happening at Run Club.

[A]

It was a story about someone.

[B]

I feel like now I'm missing out. I need to join the run club.

[A]

You need to join a run club, Brian.

[B]

I wish, I wish, but I don't have time. I have a run club. It's called 18 Children at the House. Yeah, the commercial break is a run club too. That's a gerbil run club. We're just spinning on a hamster wheel going absolutely nowhere. All right, we've over talked, but that's what two podcasters will do. So let's take a break and then we'll be back.

[A]

Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath. And now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right. It's 212433. And you can text us anytime you want or you can call and leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok CBpodcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com now I'm going to thank G one more time that we have sponsors. So thank G. And here they are.

[B]

You know what? I keep getting on Instagram ads for Bleaching my. Are you getting these?

[A]

Oh, I'm not, but I probably will now.

[B]

It's a company also. Give them a shout out. Why not? Because they're brave enough to get some information.

[A]

I'm actually curious about this.

[B]

It's called Musely. Musely. M U S E L Y. Musely. Oh, yeah. No, not like.

[A]

Not like.

[B]

Yeah, Mucil. Yeah. What's that called? Museum Musli. Is that what it's called?

[A]

It's called Muse.

[B]

Isn't like a granola or something. It's like a weird granola that the king eats.

[A]

Like a grainy granola.

[B]

A grainy, weird granola. And I think my grandma used to eat that for sure. Yeah, weird. Anyway, so it's. It's just an ad and it's. I've been getting it, I don't know, every day for like 40 days. And it says, the perfect Brian. The perfect peach is possible. All you have to do, erase dark spots in private areas with prescription skin care formulated by dermatologists.

[A]

Is that for bleaching your ass or is that for taking care of something? Like scars from, like, HS or something?

[B]

No, this says. What is the private cream? It's a prescription cream formulated to treat dark spots in the anus, underarms and genital area. So.

[A]

But his dark spots, that's like. Is that like hyperpigmentation or is that actually just. I don't know, your butthole?

[B]

Listen, and I only know this because I've had 72 children in the last six years. I only know that assholes are generally different colors. I don't know, like, I'm looking at my own. Right? But when you wipe a baby's butt, it's generally a different color than the rest of their skin, but I think that's pretty normal. And I'm not really sure why we would need to bleach our assholes. Unless. Unless you're spending a lot of time.

[A]

Down there out here watching too much porn.

[B]

Listen, listen. I don't know who these kids are that think that bleaching the asshole is going to make you any more attractive. If you are willing to go into an asshole, you are willing to deal with what is around and in the asshole.

[A]

I think you're worried about what it looks like.

[B]

Not at all. Turn the lights off like the rest of us, please. No one wants to see that. I just happen to be down there.

[A]

As long as you're. As long as it's a clean asshole, then I think you're good to go.

[B]

I don't disagree with you. Okay. But beyond the assholes in my Instagram musings, let's get to some ask TCBs that have been filling up the inbox for a very long time because I didn't know how to check the inbox properly. And so now I'm just getting to them after months and months of them being out there.

[A]

That's why I roast you on the liners, Brian.

[B]

That's it. She is good at one thing, and that is roasting me on my own show. All right, so, by the way, lots of great feedback about Astrid being on the show the other day. Thanks everyone who wrote in. Most people said they enjoyed Astrid busting my balls, so there you go. I feel like I'm the villain on my own show. You are. I know.

[A]

That's like a song from Crazy Ex Girlfriend. It's like I'm the villain in my own story.

[B]

I definitely am. I definitely am. And that's okay. You know, Vince McMahon was the heel in his own WWF and look how things turned out for him. Just fine.

[A]

Bringing awareness to being the villain.

[B]

Yes. Somebody's got to be the villain. Let it be me. You know what I do? I preempt the villainous. I preempt all of the negativity I'm going to get anyway, so I hurt myself before someone else can hurt me.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But onward and upward. Let's get to some ass TCBs that have just been compiling or piling up for, I don't know, probably six months. Who cares? We're getting to them now. That's all that matters.

[A]

Yeah. And you get my opinion and not Chrissy's.

[B]

There you go. Chrissy will be back. By the way, anybody who's wondering, Chrissy's just taking a little vacay. She'll be back. Chriss. He's on a little vacay.

[A]

She's literally, like, in Jamaica on a beach.

[B]

She was drinking on a beach. I think she has. I think she is now back in the. In the general continental United States area. Okay, more to follow. I'm not really sure what's going on there, but we'll. We'll. We'll catch up with it when it's time. Okay, so first let's go to. You know, the reason why I saved some of these questions, too, is because they're more direct about the podcast. Like, bring down the veil a little bit. Tell us what's going on behind the scenes, Brian, please. And we. I feel like we do a good job of that anyway, breaking the fourth wall on the show. We're not too precious about the commercial break because there's nothing to be precious about. But here's one that is more of a story slash question, which we get a lot of these also. Okay, so Tal in Sioux City. I am assuming. I am assuming that is Sioux City, South Dakota, and not Sioux City, Iowa. But I don't know because she didn't say. I've been dating a guy for six months. He's such a great dude. I've fallen for him. But we're in our late 20s, and the dating scene has been tough on both of us. This is just exactly what we were talking about. We've both been cheated on multiple times and both of us have what have had what we consider shitty, toxic relationships. Joined the club, doll. But the last three months are slow. Oh. So we decided to take it slow, both emotionally and sexually. But the last three months or so, we've been getting pretty close. Spending the night together almost four or five nights a week, going to friends and family events together, and even the parents. Honestly, I am not so sold on the idea of marriage in general, but he is making me think twice. All that said, I have one big concern. We have never had sex of any kind, except for oral. And he went down on me, but he didn't allow me to go down on him. I am totally respectful of his space and comfort level with sex, but I'm a bit worried at this point. He has had sex before, like with his last girlfriend just a year ago. So he does have sex. He's not a virgin. He's not religious, so this is not a religious thing. He has a penis. I've seen it and felt it. It's. It seems to work just fine. She says, okay, thanks for the update, but he just won't go there. Every time I think we are close, he shuts it down. He just keeps saying, let's slow down and make sure this is both what we want before we make a mistake. So I'm like, really, dude? It's just sex. I mean, it's sex between two caring people who have been taking it really slow in the first place. And anytime I ask him about it, he shuts down the conversation with a joke. Joke. Or he changes the subject. Brian. Chrissy. What the fuck? Brian. Christina. What the. What would you all do? Horny and helpless in Sioux City. Love the show. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Your heart and soul.

[B]

Bless your heart and soul. Well, this is a conundrum, and I can see why it's not based on religious reasons. It's not based on the fact that he doesn't want to have sex because he considers himself a virgin. Whether that's really. You know, some people are newly anointed virgins. They say, now, I'm not having sex until the right person comes along or ever again. And it certainly is. I think you're taking the right tact here. Like, it's certain you're being respectful and of his comfort level and his space. Six months is a long time. I think for two consenting adults, it's a long time to withhold sex. And I would also be concerned at this point. And if he shuts you down when you're trying to talk about it, I would be doubly concerned that not only are you not having sex, but he won't allow communication about your comfort.

[A]

Yeah, that's my thing is, like, he's at the end of the day, he's just not communicating, but he's not giving you a reason why. And like, his reason could be like, I just, I don't want to do it until this point. I don't want to do it until I'm in love with you or something. For me, couldn't fall in love with someone without, you know, making sure.

[B]

No way. Well, I fell in love with Astrid. I'm sure of it. Before I even ever physically met her in person.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

But it did not. We did not abstain for long after we had met in person. And when I say long, I mean days. Right. And that was just so that we were in a place where her, you know, her family wasn't around. Like, there were. There were like, mitigating factors. You know, her. Her mom was in town, or we were. I was staying at a hotel, whatever the deal was. But once we had the chance, once we had the comfort level and the space to do it, it happened. And that is because I will not be in a long term relationship with somebody unless I understand that we're compatible on multiple levels. Doesn't have to be a perfect fit on all levels, but it has to. There has to be some feeling. And it sounds like they get it on. So there is some. Yeah, like something going on there, clearly.

[A]

Like, they fancy each other. It's just a matter of, like, why does he not want to go there?

[B]

Like, he just doesn't even want a blowjob. Really. He doesn't even want to blow.

[A]

Actually. I have had partners who are not interested in oral. I understand.

[B]

I have been with women who I am not interested in oral from, but. Oh, that was me well. Well, it just means that, like, not to. On anybody else's abilities, but sometimes it was, like, a little toothy. It wasn't my favorite experience with that particular person, so I chose to do something else. It wasn't because I was like, you're a bad head giver, and I'm never getting ahead from you. It was just like, it's not that enjoyable that way, so it's okay. Let's do something else. Yeah.

[A]

Like, what the is he gonna say?

[B]

Well, she had a crack pipe in her mouth, and it burned the tip of my dick, so I couldn't do it. God. No.

[A]

What?

[B]

No, it was just, you know, some people have. Okay. Some people fit, and some people don't. Yeah, fine. Okay.

[A]

I've had a partner who, like. Like, was just, like, I just don't really like it. It doesn't really do that much for me. Like, it's just not really for me. So I can understand, like, this guy. If he's not really into it, that's fine. But it's also, like, then how is. Like, what is how. Where is he driving his pleasure? And, like, the playing field doesn't feel super even right now. And it feels like he's making it that way. And it kind of feels like him withholding sex is, like, maybe for a way to.

[B]

Like a power play. Yeah, well, maybe you might be right. Don't know. It's hard to tell because we don't hear his side of the story. Right. And we don't know enough of the details because that's literally all she wrote.

[A]

If you told her what was up or, like, I'm just not feeling emotionally ready for that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or it's okay.

[B]

Or, listen, I've had some really bad sexual experiences, and it gives me PTSD or whatever the case is. There's lots of different reasons. Absolutely. And so now I would say this. This is ultimatum time. And not in the most gentle of ways. And I'll say ultimatum in a bad way, but this is the time when you say to your friend, your boyfriend, sounds like you guys are serious. You've met the parents, you're sleeping together four or five nights a week.

[A]

She said she's falling for.

[B]

She's falling for him. She's saying she's reconsidering the ide idea of marriage for him. Like, that's a pretty big deal. Don't do it.

[A]

Well, hey, we're not interested in the shackles of marriage, okay? I. I'm just saying I get where she's coming from, okay?

[B]

Fair enough. And I understand the idea of marriage is not for everybody. And marriage, you probably. I would say that 50% of people, as proven by statistics, should not get married. Yeah, they should not get married. Take your time on that one. You don't have to rush into marriage or. Or get married at all. You can live a perfect, wonderful life together without ever having a piece of paperwork.

[A]

Number one piece of advice is don't get married in your 20s.

[B]

No, I agree with that.

[A]

Wait, I agree with 30s.

[B]

Yeah, 30s, 40s, 80s. Figure it out later on down the road. But here's the thing. Ultimatum time. This is when you say, okay, listen, I don't know what his name is, but let's say it's Bob. Hey, Bob. Because he sounds like a Bob. Let's say, hey, Bob.

[A]

Hey, Bob.

[B]

Hey, Bob. Say, Bob, we're either going to talk about it or we're going to do it. It. But there's no more getting around it. So you either have to tell me what's up and not that, you know, we're taking it slow, because I no longer am comfortable taking it slow. Because it's also about your comfort level, too. If you want to have sex with Bob, get it, girl. You have to not force yourself on him, but you have to be the one to press the issue to a conclusion that is satisfying to you and be ready for the conclusion is, I don't want to have sex with you. You. So it's time to break up. Because that might be the conclusion. But it's better that he tell you that now than a year and a half from now when you've been absolutely frustrated to all to know, get out. You have, you know, no. No outlet to have your big O. This is in a critical moment for you, too.

[A]

Well, she's getting her big O.

[B]

Apparently so. Well, I mean, we don't know her.

[A]

Nut, which I must respect.

[B]

That's crazy. That's just crazy to me.

[A]

Get your nut is one of the grossest things that I say. I. I say it a lot.

[B]

Yeah, get your nut.

[A]

I say, girl, get your nut.

[B]

You could be talking about a squirrel. Get your nut, squirrel.

[A]

Get your nut.

[B]

I say it all the time to the kids. I'm looking at that. Squirrels getting his nut. He's got his nut. He's digging it in the ground.

[A]

But, yeah, so she's obviously getting her nut. But it feels like a weird little power play. So I think the bottom line is you gotta, you know, break down that barrier. You gotta get the communication flowing. And if that Means that you're gonna break up, then you have to be okay with that.

[B]

I agree. I think we're. I think we're all on the same page here. Is that it is a little strange that Bob has withheld this long not even getting any. He's not even, apparently. I don't know, but it sounds like he's not even getting off. That's another thing that would have me, like, if I'm. I'm 90% worried. Yeah, I'm 90% worried about communication issues, but I'm 10% worried about where is he getting his nut? Where is he getting his nut?

[A]

Where is his nut?

[B]

Nut. Where is his nut? Is he jizzing? And with whom is he jizzing? This is. These are my concerns. I'm concerned for Bob.

[A]

Yeah, he got her, but he's not jizzing.

[B]

Yeah, well.

[A]

And as we know, 21 EPMs a month, critical. Well, that's right, obviously.

[B]

That's right. 21 EPMs. So if you guys are four or five nights a week together, that means you're spending 20 nights together where there is no jizzing. What is going on? I need Bob on the show immediately. Immediately. I'd like to talk to Bob privately at 212-212-4333. TCB. All right. Okay, so let's get through some of these other ones. Susie from Massachusetts says, brian, you talk a lot of shit about T. Caputo. I mostly agree with you about Teresa, but do you believe in ghosts or the afterlife? Because it sounds like you're shitting on the whole thing. No, I'm not shitting on the whole thing, and I've never said that. What I've said was if there are ghosts. If there are ghosts or spirits, energies, afterlife, if there's any of that that's visiting us. I don't think they're choosing Teresa Caputo to be the vehicle upon which they give their message. That's what I said. Do I believe in ghosts? I've never seen one, so it's hard to believe in them.

[A]

Never had a paranormal experience?

[B]

Yes, I have had a paranormal experience. Yes, I have. I've had sleep paralysis. I've seen things in the night. I've had.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Yeah, you did. Yeah, I know that story.

[B]

I did have energetic communications that I would consider telepathy. In weird ways. I've had all kind of unexplainable things happen to me. And I am open to the idea that anything can happen. Anything. What I do know to be true for myself. For myself. Only is that Theresa Caputo is not the person that's getting these messages and delivering them to anybody. She is a huckster who is doing a circus trick. She is a scammer, and she getting her money and congratulations. But I think she does it to the detriment of other human beings. And that I don't care for. So I don't care on people's pain.

[A]

And so we will roast her until, you know, she's off the air.

[B]

Yes. So do I. Do I. Which should be soon. I hope. She's on, like, the 18th iteration of her show.

[A]

She's on another show.

[B]

It's crazy. She just keeps on rehashing the same show.

[A]

Don't know how she is booking this. Like, honestly, her manager is incredible.

[B]

Her manager is incredible. My guess, Christina, My guess guess is she's getting very little money for the show. Like, the production costs are paid for, and she makes like maybe 15, $20,000 an episode, which in the grand scheme of things is not that much. But what she is doing is she's filling the seats in the auditorium, which is what really makes her money. So this is essentially a big promo tool for To. To her tool for her to work.

[A]

Well, just so you know, I'm going to start charging you 15,000 per episode that I'm on.

[B]

I don't think we made $15,000 on the last six months.

[A]

So, you know, that's my rate.

[B]

Yes. Okay, here we go. So let me. Let me cap that by saying, do I believe in ghosts? I don't not believe in ghosts. That's. That's all I'm guess how I'm going to put it. I am open to the idea that anything is possible, anything at all. Okay, one more. Then we're going to take a break, and then we. And then we'll go back, get back to more of these. Okay. Todd from Spokane says, I like that you pull the curtain back behind the podcast biz. And you're always saying that TCB has no listeners. I assume this is in jest, but I am a listener and I have a few friends that listen to you also. So here's the question. Is it true that you have no listeners and how many people do listen to the show? Well, we actually. Yeah. Todd, Todd, Todd. Do you think we could do 500 episodes of the commercial break for a week if we had no listeners? Of course we have listeners. It's Christina, my wife, and my father. Those are our three listeners.

[A]

Get downloads for me. No, I know that's not true. I AM subscribed.

[B]

It's okay. Yeah, I am subscribed too. But you got to keep on re engaging that subscription now because Apple changed the way they do things. But Todd, of course we have listeners. Yes, we have listeners. There are listeners that you wrote in where you are a listener. You have friends that listen. You know that there are listeners. But yeah, I'm not going to share. How many listeners is not important. It's a vanity metric anyway, I don't care. I enjoy doing the show. And, and we on occasion get a paycheck from some companies who we have worked with in the past. So there you go.

[A]

Also, I will say every time I tell people who I work for, they are like what I've never heard. And I'm like, yeah, don't worry about it.

[B]

Yeah, don't worry about it. You don't even have to look into it.

[A]

Important. It's probably not your demographic.

[B]

No one knows the show, the commercial brand.

[A]

That's how I like it.

[B]

Yeah, but honestly, you have to think about this. We aren't on tv. I'm not Jimmy Kimmel or Fallon or, you know, a host on late night television show.

[A]

Celebrity podcast.

[B]

We're not celebrity podcasts. So we have a very limited scope upon which people would know us. And you could, with the amount of people that listen to us, you could literally go through life and probably never meet another commercial break listener. But that doesn't mean we have no listeners. It just means we don't have a lot of listeners, comparatively spread out. Let me tell you this. Joe Rogan has 157 million people. People, million downloads. Sorry, not people. Million downloads every single month. We have somewhere south of that. How does that, does that narrow it down for you, Todd? There you go. Conan has 28 million or something along those lines. I think we have somewhere south of that. Yes, Christina's podcast. We probably have somewhere south of that.

[A]

No, not true. Go listen to my podcast.

[B]

What's the name of that podcast before? What's the name of that podcast? Podcast.

[A]

It's called to all the rom coms We've loved before.

[B]

And we talk about rom coms and.

[A]

We'Re very cute and fun.

[B]

It is a pretty funny show. So go listen. All right, so let's take, let's take another break and then we'll be back. We'll answer a few more questions. We'll be back.

[A]

I know you're already on your phone, so pull up Instagram and follow us at the commercial break and then follow us on tick tock@tcb podcast. Done. Perfect. Thank you. Since you're at the rest, why not text us hello at 212-4333, TCV. Or if you've got some drama in your life, a little fun story or anything, really. We're desperate for content. Call and leave us a message at 212-433-33, TCV. And don't forget to check out tcvpodcast.com because that's got it all. Speaking of having it all, let's listen to our fabulous sponsors and get back to the commercial break.

[B]

Okay. Back here with Christina doing some Ask a tcbs.

[A]

So I love your let's get back to the show voice. I'm sorry. I just have to say it every time. Like, hey, we're back to the show.

[B]

And we're back. Yeah, I know. And you know what I realized I'm.

[A]

Back here with Christina.

[B]

Do you know what I used to say? I used to go like, and we're back. Talking about this or that. And we're back. In case you missed it. And I'm like, no. How would anybody have gotten to this point in the show unless they were listening to the this point in the show? It's such a ridiculous thing to say. Why do I have to recap? I know. And we're back. It's my 19.

[A]

It just makes me giggle. Every time I'm editing the show, I'm like. It says, and we're back, boys.

[B]

And we're back.

[A]

Anyway, sorry.

[B]

No, I agree with you totally. And so go back and listen to some. When I was. We do what's called live editing. So I actually pull. I actually run the commercials during the show. I run the brakes, and then Christina edits it afterwards to make sure it's nice and touched, tight and listenable. But when I do that, I don't know why, it's like I go into 90s game show host mode. I'm like, and we're back. Who cares if we're back?

[A]

You kind of do it on your ads too, though, which is a little bit funny.

[B]

Yeah, but that's, you know, we call it the commercial break. So I figure I give it a little commercial flavor. I'm also pulling the curtains back. I also really don't care for most. Some people do it really well, but most podcasters start running their ads in the middle of the show. They just start mouthing off about, you know, whatever mattress they're doing, and it lasts for three and a half minutes, and they try and wrap it into the content poorly. Yeah, the Content poorly. And so I decided from the beginning not to patronize my listeners and put music beds and make it like a commercial so that they know that it's a commercial and they can choose to go there if they want to and not do that to the dissatisfaction of some of my sponsors. I am not Mr. Let's roll it into the content for 48 minutes. Let's make a whole episode about mattresses that you get in a box. It's like, okay, dude. All right, all right, okay. So Laquita, in from Chicago, Illinois, home state, hometown, says, how do you prep for the shows? I love how many different topics y' all cover on each episode. How do you come up with the ideas? This is a question. I get a lot off air, actually, because no one actually listens to the show, so they just asked me how I come up with the ideas for the show. It's a mishmash of a lot of different things. You gotta trust me that there's not. It doesn't. There's not as much work as you might think going into content ideas. And if you really listen to the show, you probably understand that is that literally, since we do four shows a week, I put. Pick my. Put my finger on whatever magazine, you know, news online magazine I'm reading. I go, oh, that's an interesting story. And then we talk about it. Or if I have a story to tell, usually based around something that's happened in my life. It's not. It's not that it's not as difficult as people think it is, but it does consume a lot of time to come up with content ideas. But once you get the content ideas, you just roll with it. It's not that difficult.

[A]

Full of, like, you, like me. It's really easy to just talk, mouth.

[B]

Off for an hour. And if you listen to some episodes, Christina and I know you know this because we have done it ourselves. Recording episodes is that one idea. Idea will literally go for an hour, but we lose that idea in the first five minutes, and then we end up somewhere completely different.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So imagine.

[A]

That's fun.

[B]

I think it's fun too. Imagine, Laquita, that you're at a bar talking with your best friend. You guys, guys, girls, whatever, have had a few beers, you're talking with your best friends, and all of a sudden, two hours has passed and you forgot what you were talking, what you started talking about, but now you're ending on whatever. My boyfriend hates me or I hate my boyfriend or whatever. It's like a circular conversation that Just never connects back to the beginning. It's not all that difficult. Thank God that, you know, Christina and I and Chrissy, you know, we could talk all day long if we wanted to. Shane, Not Shane Gillis, by the way. Shane in Indianapolis asks, I've noticed you guys don't run as many commercials as you used to. That's a good thing. But why? How did you all decide to reduce the ads? Do sponsors give you free shit? And who is your favorite sponsor?

[A]

You have answers to that?

[B]

I have answers to this. We don't always choose to run less ads. See, here's how it goes.

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

Yeah, I know this is like, I gotta be delicate about this one. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I just know some of the answers.

[B]

Yeah. So let's put it this way. The show used to. We. You put an electronic ad marker in the show where you want the ads to go, usually, always coinciding with the break. So Christina does her neat little liner, and then you hear ads. Most of them are producer red, meaning somebody else reads the commercials, and we run them just like a radio ad would. Those commercials are injected into the show by a hosting company, our hosting platform. That hosting company has 100% control over whether or not an ad goes into an ad slot based on the inventory they have available or where you're listening from, or maybe if you're male or female or whatever. Whatever. It's targeting, just like every other online advertising. But we also, I think, got a little crazy with the ad markers for a second there, and we had a few too many. So we paired them back when we moved to Odyssey, who is our new, new network. We paired them back a little bit. Make the listening experience just a little bit better. Makes also our revenue a little bit lower.

[A]

And that's okay.

[B]

I got a little slutty I got a little slutty I gotta admit it, I do say I got a little slutty. Well, we weren't getting any other kind of ads, so I was like, well, why the fuck? Yeah, we needed to be slutty. We wanted to be slutty. That's what we wanted.

[A]

Had to be slutty.

[B]

That actually, yes. Like, I'm sure a lot of people who do jobs, you know, they're like, well, while we're doing it, we might as well make some money doing it. But I think we're good. We're now at a good, manageable, you know, five, six ads per show over the course of an hour, hour and 15 minutes, which is five or six minutes. So it's not that big of a deal. I don't think. If you have a problem with this Shane, then you're certainly welcome to write back in.

[A]

Shane yeah.

[B]

Do we get free shit? Shane Fucking Shane. Thanks for opening up the can of worms, Shane. Do we get free shit? On occasion doesn't happen as often as you would think it would. But of course some sponsors would like you to, to know their product very well. So they send stuff ahead of time. 99.9% of the time when, when I read an ad or Christina reads an ad or on the rare occasion that Holy reads an ad on those occasions, these are products that we like, we use or would use. And in the occasion that we don't yet use the product, oftentimes we will be asked if we need the product to try or to test. So that's how that works. And if they, if we say yes, then they will send us some. So some. I would say it's probably a good 60, like maybe 60, 40, 60% of the time we already use the product and then 40% of the time we use the product before we read the commercial so that we know what to, you know, so we can say good things about the sponsor. That's how it works. That's how it all works. Influencers, everybody. That's how it all works. Who's my favorite sponsor so far? That's a great question. Who is my favorite sponsor? Okay, go. I.

[A]

Well, I have to say I use Rocket Money and I really like them.

[B]

Rocket Money is great. Yes, I have used them.

[A]

I love Rocket Money. I use it. I used to use like my own like personal spreadsheet to track all my finances.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I really liked it because I it, I love spreadsheets but it is a lot of work. And the nice thing about Rocket Money is that it does like take a lot of the work out. And I like looking at my like month to month, what I spent on this, what I spent on this especially like I had a lot of medical expenses last year so it's really helpful for me to like look through all of that and like doing my taxes.

[B]

And deducting this episode sponsored by Rocket Money.

[A]

I'm just saying. No, I like Rocket Money and yeah.

[B]

Yeah, I like Rocket Money too. Magic Spoon has been a favorite because we do like their food. I actually like Magic Spoon cereal. So I eat it.

[A]

Cereal and cream.

[B]

Cereal and cream. It defeats the purpose of Magic Spoon but when I the healthier cereal it totally defeats a burp. It does help a little. I like Magic Spoon and then There we did one for. Who did we do one for? I don't know. There was like a. There was a travel company that we did one for one time. I can't. I wanna. I don't want to say it wrong. I think it was Travelocity and I do use Travelocity.

[A]

You've talked about that on the show, so.

[B]

Yeah. So there you go. Okay. That's. You know, all of our sponsors are favorite sponsors while they're sponsoring the show.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

All right. Dab. Dab. His name is Dab. I'm assuming this is a he Dab. D A B in California. I'm really enjoying your guest episodes so far. Joanna has been my favorite. Who has been your favorite on the show and why? Who is your dream guest and who would you. And not who's your dream guest and who would you love to have on the show? I'm assuming that's one question. Who's your favorite guest so far?

[A]

Me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think I'm gonna go Felicia Day.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She's my queen or no Heather McMahon.

[B]

Heather McMahon. Yeah.

[A]

She's my icon on. Well, I've loved her for a really long time, but I would say Felicia day and Heather McMahon up at the top.

[B]

I think there's a three way tie here with one. Okay, I'm with you. With one. Moving a little bit higher than the others just because, you know, it's weird when you have a guest and they're just. They're people like the rest of us and you never know how they're going to react or behave. We're meeting for the first time. It's like literally we're meeting them for the first time and they don't know who the commercial break is. Just like most of the people out in the world don't know who the commercial break is. So sometimes people take a while to get warmed up and in those ca. But then there's like people that you meet outside in your normal course of activities. They're like really friendly and right off the bat you hit it off and you're like, wow, this is a great guest. I would say Heather, Felicia and Joanna have both been. Have all three been wonderful guests on the show. Blair has been a wonderful guest. Rose Bud was awesome.

[A]

Yeah, everyone's.

[B]

Everyone's been really great. Steve O was fantastic. I love talking to Steve O. And he really got into it and.

[A]

He was interesting every different person.

[B]

But I think, like, as far as like connecting with somebody, like feeling great about the interview while it's happening, I do think Joanna takes a little bit of the slice of cake just because. And I don't want to say that any of the other people were bad. They weren't. But Joanna and I share something, and that is the love of Venezuelan culture. She's Venezuelan. I'm just a guy who, like, who wants to be Venezuelan. But I really enjoyed Joanna. I thought she was great.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, so that, that's it. Who would I like to have on the show? There's lots of people that I would like to have on the show. I think Conan o'. Brien. I think Conan o' Brien would be a good guest. I think that, you know, you know who I have all, you know who I think that I would love to have on the show. Well, I'm going to be careful about this one.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah, I just want to be careful about this one. I'm trying to think about whether I should say this out loud as I think we probably could get her as a guest in the. I'll tell you off air. How's that? Let me, let me not jinx myself, but Conan, Conan comes to mind just because I think he is kind of a. He's been through a wacky journey as a late night talk show host and now is like one of the most respected or famous podcasters out there. Just from like a. We do the same thing. You are obviously much better and much richer. I am. I would like to pick your brain about it. I think Conan would be a great person to sit down with and talk to. I've also heard interviews where he really, like, opens up and it's, he's, he's a very tender, empathetic, interesting human being and I think I'd like to have him on the show. There is a female equivalent that I would like just as much. But I will tell you off air because I think we're, we may actually try and get her as a guest. So I don't want to jinx it. Yeah, I don't want to jinx it. I don't want to say anything where she, like, they're talking about me already. I don't want to go on the show. But stay tuned. Okay. Steve in Atlanta says, why don't you all do a live show here in Atlanta? That's where you're based. Why wouldn't you just do a live show here in Atlanta? I'm sure you could fill the theater. I could bring my T shirt.

[A]

That's fun.

[B]

I have a T shirt cannon. I could bring it and make Frankie B. Shirts and shoot it. Into the audience. Yes, Steve. Okay.

[A]

Steve is a real one.

[B]

Steve is on fire. Steve, I'll tell you what.

[A]

You rent my Run Club.

[B]

Steve's probably in your Run Club. He's one of those guys up front not sending people back. Yeah, no.

[A]

Steve was like, leave her behind.

[B]

Steve's too worried about lubing up his T shirt gun when he gets home. That's right, Steve. We're, we're working on it. Like, we're working on it. Just know this. I do believe there will be. I do believe there will be commercial break live shows and I do believe that 2024 might be the year when, when a few of those at least happen. So stay tuned. And of course, if a live show, we will of course do one in our home city because it's probably the only one I can be assured will fill the audience. The audience. And you could be one of those people, Steve, right there. And we're not talking about theaters. I think we're talking about clubs. That's where we're going to play. You can't.

[A]

Bars.

[B]

Yeah, Dive bars. They could imagine that. I rent out the Fox theater. I know, but then only 100 people show up out of 5,000. What am I going to do? I'll never work in the stall again. People will be like, well, there it goes.

[A]

That Brian Green, big loser.

[B]

That's right. All those listeners. Hate listeners, apparently. Yeah. Or I feel like I know I'm going to get tick tocked like that. Like Trump did that one time where all the young kids just buy up the tickets and no one shows up. Yes. That was the ultimate rug pole and I loved it. I'm sorry, whatever you think of whoever. I loved watching Trump get a rug pull on him. I just thought it was brilliant. I thought it was great. Grand. Steve, we're going to do it. I, I think it's going to be this year. And Atlanta will be on the list, I promise you. Sola. Dad in Arizona. I'm putting this in just to give my wife back a little bit from all the hell she gave me last week. Brian, her name is Soledad. That's a cool name. Like, the only other Soledad I know is Soledad o'. Brien. Doesn't she work for CNN or something? Soledad o'.

[A]

Brien. I don't know.

[B]

She's a news reporter. Soledad says, brian, I have a little crush on. On you. I love it when Astrid is on the show and I'm not a home wrecker. I'm actually happily married for seven years, but I Have you on my freebie list. Freebie list. You know what the freebie list is? Who is on your freebie list? Who's on my freebie list? Well, now you, Soledad, because you're apparently the only other person in the world that wants to have sex with Brian Green. I think I've got Dua Lipa on there. I think I've got Dua. I do love me some Dua Lipa. Who else was on there? I think Jennifer Aniston at one point was on there. But I'm. I do love me some Jennifer Aniston. You know, there's other. There's other women. I certainly find a celebrity women that I find attractive. And, yeah, I don't want to share that with everybody. That's my personal. I don't want to share with everybody because then I know what's going to happen. We're going to get one of these people, like 12 years from now on as a guest, and someone's going to pull the tape and be like, yeah, he wants to. Fucker. Yeah, I know you. Exactly. That's what I got to be.

[A]

Careful. I'm going to roast you on TikTok, Brian.

[B]

All right, now, I'm putting this one in here because I have strong feelings about this, and I believe that Christina will also, you know me. Now, preface this. We never talk about politics on the show. It's a purposeful choice that's made because I believe that we all need a break from it from time to time. And opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one. They all stink. You can go listen to many places for political opinions and punditry. The commercial break is. Is a free zone where you just don't have to worry about. For the most part, you'll pick up on it if. If you listen enough, you'll pick up on our leanings, but you get it. But this listener sale. S a Y L. I'm assuming this is a woman, but I really have no idea. From New York. I know y' all stay out of politics, but I have to ask, what is your opinion of Roe versus The recent decision on Roe versus Wade and the Alabama ruling that I. That embryos are children? I think you are ruining, ruining, ruining a woman's right to do anything with her own body. It's an ultimate power play. And it's up. And I will.

[A]

Stupid.

[B]

Yeah. I will say this. The moment that I get a vagina and a uterus, I will start having a strong opinion about this. But until then, it is a woman's right. To do whatever it is she chooses with her own body. And, and I also know what the struggles are like for fertility issues and to shut the door on hundreds of thousands, maybe millions of women and men, men and men, women and women having children in this country is a godamn shame. And I don't know who this judge is on the Supreme Court who's out there talking about God's plan and God's this and God's that has no place in politics. And he should be immediate, immediately, immediately taken off the bench. In my opinion. Even the Republicans who brought this on themselves, Trump being separated from the Washington.

[A]

State for a reason.

[B]

Yeah, even the Republicans realized exactly two and a half minutes after that happened that, holy shit, what have we done? And goddamn right what have we done? You know what you've done? You've pissed off at least 52% of this country and this will come back to bite you in the ass, as it is in every election since Rose v. Wade was overturned. And, and you're getting your comeuppance. And I'm not. I'm not. I voted Republican. I have voted liberal Democrat in my life. I voted independent in my life. But I'll tell you what, not like this. I won't fuck. No, it's just crazy. It's insane. You're insane. You people are insane. What are you thinking at this point?

[A]

It's just like we're too far past any sort of like, with the human right rights, human rights violations and women's rights and health care in general. We're like, way too far past to not vote Democrat, in my opinion. Because, like, if you're voting Republican, you're truly just voting against people. You're, you're voting against, like, letting people live and letting people like, have their fucking life. Yeah, it's just insane. You're just on. You're also voting, like, for guns and for killing children and.

[B]

Well, listen, this topic and this top topic only if you are going to be a right to life, human being, if you're going to put life above all else, then do it from conception to grave. From conception to grave. You cannot sit there and be a pro lifer and vote down penalty. Yeah, vote for the death penalty. Deny people access to modern health care or any kind of health care whatsoever. Welfare, you cannot do that. That is absolutely hypocritical. But that doesn't serve their purposes right now. So that's why they vote yes on one thing and no on the other. And I say they. I mean these, the very extreme People who have the idea that this is good policy, it never was, it never is. Is the country won't be the same after Roe v. Wade. And I think the people who have brought this on are going to see that the country is not going to stand for it. This is a losing issue. This is a losing issue. You should absolutely have the right to do whatever you want with your body. And if you want to vote about it, then you have to have a uterus to vote about it. How's that? That makes sense. If you're going to put policies in place, then have people with uteruses make those policies. That's it.

[A]

Just the fact that like the people who are voting on this and who are voting on our rights and our bodies are, you know, median age, 58 year old men.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's just that you don't, you just don't have the right. Sorry.

[B]

Well, I agree with.

[A]

The only other thing I will say about it is about all the IVF stuff going on right now. Because I mean, I think if you've heard me on any of these episodes, you know what I think? But it was just the fact that all these Republicans then were kind of walking back their word, trying to be like, no, we are strong, strongly for IVF for all this stuff. But then they had actively voted and worked for this bill that had no exclusions for ivf, IVF in it when they were all about, you know, oh, we're pro life.

[B]

It's all hypocrisy.

[A]

Bullshit.

[B]

It's all hypocrisy.

[A]

Sick of their shit.

[B]

Well, listen, I'm sick of all of it, to be honest with you. This happens on all sides of the aisle, but this issue alone is one that I think. Trump. No, not this issue. This issue issue is going to Trump all, including Trump when it comes time for people to vote for a president in 2024. And I think that this is just, this is crazy. Like there has to be some balance.

[A]

Restored to the universe in a dystopian society.

[B]

Well, we're getting there.

[A]

All right.

[B]

That's the one political question I'll take for the entire year.

[A]

Done with it really end on a low number.

[B]

I'm already upset now. Going to walk into my rest of my day just completely torn up and furious. Furious. So crazy. Everyone's crazy. Yeah.

[A]

I hate this, being a woman in America.

[B]

Well, listen, I got daughters and this is what really makes me. I mean, have a wife, I have daughters. This makes me incensed. It just makes me incense to think that you know other people are going to have control over.

[A]

It should make everyone incense.

[B]

Well, it doesn't, but it does sense make. Make most people incense. So that's a good news. The good news is it does make most people incense, but it doesn't make everybody incensed, apparently. I don't know. I don't know. Anyway. All right. Okay, there you go. You got all your questions answered or not all of them, but you got some of your questions answered. We'll get to more of them down the line. Chrissy should be back shortly, whenever that is. She's gonna be back, I promise, very soon. And yeah, what else was I gonna say? I was gonna say one more thing, but I can't remember. Okay, so go to TCPodcast.com so you find out more about the show. All the video, all the audio right there at one location. Well, all the audio, most of the video right there at one location. DCB podcast.com if you would like your free piggy fronting sticker, go to the website, hit the contact us button. There's a little drop down menu. It says I want my free sticker. You drop in your physical address and then away. It will go straight to your hands. In seven to 12 months it'll be right around the corner. Don't worry, you'll get it.

[A]

That's called efficiency.

[B]

It's called efficiency. We only have one staff member here, so. No, it's me. You can also dial us up. 212-4333, tcb. That's 2124333, tcb. Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. Ask tcb, ask Brian's mom. All that stuff goes into the bucket. Text us. Or you can leave a voicemail. If you leave a voicemail, just be mindful that I may use your voice on air. So don't give us any like identifying information like I'm 32, I'm Caucasian, I live in one two three main street. Yeah, Christina. Christina will dox you. Don't worry. Yeah, no, I'm kidding. Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB, podcast on Twitter, Tik Tok and YouTube.com the commercial break. Thanks, Dr. Phil. Until next time, Christina. That's definitely all I can do for today. But I will say this best to you, best to you, and best to you out there on the podcast universe. Until next time, Christina and I must say, we do say and we will say goodbye. Sam. Ra.