Mmmmm..Norish Princess!

Summary

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The Commercial Break – “Mmmmm…Norish Princess!”

Date: August 28, 2025
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Oatley
Guest Mentioned: Jamie Kern Lima (clip), Brett Gelman, Dusty Slay

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Overview

This episode of The Commercial Break features Bryan and Krissy catching up after a short break. Through their signature chaotic, off-the-cuff banter, they riff on topics like parental involvement in schools, 90s and 2000s youth mischief, comedian guests, and the shockingly weird royal family drama from Norway. The hosts also react to cringe-worthy pop culture interviews (notably one with Jamie Kern Lima) and deliver their satirical takes on parenthood, streaming wars, and why Netflix has "broken" television. Comedian Dusty Slay and actor Brett Gelman are discussed as recent guests, and the episode's highlight is an irreverent deep-dive on the Norwegian royal family’s tabloid-worthy scandals.

The tone remains irreverent, spontaneous, and full of side tangents, "embracing its chaotic, unpolished charm."

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

School Days & Parental Involvement

(04:49 – 23:26)

• Bryan recounts a string of illness in his house, poking fun at parental paranoia over "MRSA" and school gossip.

• Both hosts reflect on how parental involvement in schools has skyrocketed since their childhood:

  • Bryan mocks the number of school meetings and parent-teacher conferences, recalling the dread associated with these events.
  • Bryan: "Why do we have a parent teacher conference? What could you possibly know about my kid yet? You’ve seen him for five hours!” (07:13)
  • Krissy talks about her mother’s PTA involvement; Bryan’s parents were less engaged.
  • Conversation shifts to changing generational norms—parents are now more present, sometimes veering into "helicopter" territory.

• Notable Quote:

  • "Just one water slide in my life, just one encephalitis-filled, mud-flopped, dead-grass-filled, swampy water slide, and my whole educational career could have been different. I could have been a doctor or a lawyer or a QuickBooks expert—or an accountant." — Bryan (23:19)

School Mischief & Discipline: Then vs. Now

(08:09 – 16:36)

• Reminiscing about school, Bryan admits to being a "total shithead," though more mischievous than malicious:
  • Anecdote about pouring pixie sticks into an air conditioner on a field trip.
• Discussion about disciplinary systems (demerits, detentions) and a strict, universally disliked “disciplinary officer.”
  • Bryan: "There was a disciplinary officer... a former nun...her job was running around making people miserable." (14:46)
• Smoking on campus—reflecting on how different things were in the ‘90s:
  • Krissy: "I remember the smoking happening in the bathroom." (15:39)
  • Both recall how odd it sounds now to have “smoking areas” for high schoolers.

Catching Up on Comedian Guests

(28:37 – 36:45)

• Recent guests: Brett Gelman and Dusty Slay.
  • The audience response to Dusty Slay was enthusiastic, with listeners texting after the episode.
  • Bryan’s review of Dusty’s special:
    “If we’re going to give it a score, I’m going 8.75 out of 10.” (32:10)
  • Krissy: "That's a high score."
  • Discussion of style: both appreciate clean comedy when it’s smart and genuinely funny, even if that's not "their thing."
  • Brett Gelman’s new show: The hosts describe it as “the weirdest thing” they’ve seen, a “horror comedy drama with a little of the occult.” They are honest about finding it entertaining-yet-bizarre, and “not sure it’s right up their alley,” but recommend listeners give it a try.

Streaming Wars & The Death of Traditional TV

(36:45 – 46:16)

• Netflix’s "Stranger Things" is set to premiere during the holidays, and the hosts joke about how it will disrupt family time.

  • Bryan: "It takes some real fucking cahoots to say, you know what we're going to do? We're going to ruin your Christmas, we're going to ruin your Thanksgiving, and on top of that, we're going to ruin your New Year ..." (36:48)

• Briefly discuss "The Paper," Peacock’s new “Office” spin-off, and the difficulty of capturing the magic of the original.

  • Reference to other TV spinoff successes, like “Better Call Saul,” and the rarity of lightning striking twice.

• Broader discussion about TV being “officially broken,” with streaming/podcasting as the new norm.

  • Jimmy Kimmel not renewing, Conan O’Brien’s pivot, and how "the media landscape will never be the same."

Insufferable Influencer Banter: Jamie Kern Lima & Meghan Markle

(49:24 – 52:44)

• Hosts react live to a viral podcast interview between Jamie Kern Lima and Meghan Markle.
  • Bryan calls it "the most insufferable conversation ever."
  • Cringe-laden clip where “affirmational” words like “yet” are endlessly repeated ("I can’t do it… YET!") (51:45).
  • Bryan’s sarcastic quip: “Yet. Oh, such a powerful word ‘yet,’ Chrissy. We haven’t gotten that 20-million-dollar contract… yet. Neither of us have been to jail yet… It’s insufferable." (52:22)

The Wild Norwegian Royal Family Saga

(23:27, 49:24, 52:44 – 64:10)

• The highlight of the episode: the Norwegian royal family’s ongoing “chaotic, tabloid-level drama.”

  • Bryan explains the strange case of the Norwegian crown prince’s son—born from a one-night stand, frequently arrested, recently accused of serious crimes.
  • Also, the princess’s unconventional marriage to an American “shaman” and self-proclaimed alien who claims to be able to regenerate his limbs.
  • Ridicule at the expense of tabloid culture and the eccentricities of European royalty.
  • Netflix is filming a documentary about the Norwegian princess and her "shaman" husband.
  • Bryan: “He claims to be from outer space—a different universe. He’s clairvoyant and he’s here to save the world. He’s a guru, a clairvoyant guru out of California. He is a wild, wild character and he’s marrying… the royal family.” (55:38)

• The hosts joke repeatedly about getting Princess Martha Louise and her shaman husband on the podcast.

• Krissy: "I love this. Yeah, I’m gonna turn on my alerts for that one." (58:05)

• Commentary on generational differences, race, and the peculiar specifics of Norwegian culture and scandal.

  • Bryan: “God, you’re Norrish. The Norrish royals are crazy. They’re insane!" (57:58)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Bryan, on school meetings:
  "What are we doing the first day of school? Is it just, like, a setup? What is going to happen?" (16:49)
• On clean comedy:
  "Gay porn, straight porn, I could really do either or as long as it's good, you know what I mean?" —Bryan (31:29)
• On podcasting's rise:
  "Conan needs a friend [is]… just like we do. He has exactly the same amount of cachet that the commercial break does!" (45:07)
• On the Norwegian royal shaman:
  "He claims he can regenerate his own body... Who hasn't met their wife in a past life?!" —Bryan (58:36, 60:56)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• (04:49 – 16:49): School days, parent conferences, childhood mischief
• (28:37 – 36:45): Comedian guests—Dusty Slay, Brett Gelman; reviews and reflections
• (36:45 – 46:16): TV/streaming, Stranger Things, Office spin-off, “broken TV” thesis
• (49:24 – 52:44): Meghan Markle/Jamie Kern Lima podcast mockery
• (52:44 – 64:10): Main event—Norwegian royal family drama, shaman husband revelations

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Conclusion & Final Thoughts

Bryan and Krissy maintain The Commercial Break’s signature spontaneity, irreverence and “cheesecake factory” blend of topics. Listeners get:

• Relatable stories about the perils and paranoia of modern parenting
• Candid reviews and insights for fans of stand-up and streaming
• A hilarious takedown of influencer podcast culture
• A rabbit hole deep-dive into royal absurdity, capped with a plea to someday interview the shamanic Norwegian princess and consort.

As always, they close with gratitude to fans, reminders to join via socials, and an enthusiastic sign-off.

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This episode is a ride—equal parts childhood nostalgia, comic interview wrap-up, pop culture skewering, and tabloid oddity news, seasoned with the hosts’ signature self-aware humor and comradery.

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Transcript

[Brian Greene]

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[Jamie Kern Lima]

Hello.

[Brian Greene]

Hello.

[Wallet (Personification)]

How are you? Oh, I'm your wallet. And I'm so excited too.

[Brian Greene]

Well, I'm trying to make it real here, if you don't mind.

[Wallet (Personification)]

I get it. I understand. I'm sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to remind you that Taylor and.

[Brian Greene]

Travis are getting married.

[Wallet (Personification)]

And there's gonna be posters and T shirts and double albums and streaming and pay per view weddings and Time magazine and People magazine and. And shoes and jingle jangles and wristbands. Oh my gosh, I'm gonna get such a workout. You better ask for that increase of credit.

[Brian Greene]

Thanks.

[Wallet (Personification)]

You're welcome.

[Brian Greene]

Thanks.

[Wallet (Personification)]

I'll be back real soon. I'm sure.

[Brian Greene]

On this episode of the Commercial Break, the Jamie Kern Lima show podcast. Okay. All right. If that's not confusing enough. Also a guest shark on Shark Tank, best selling author and founder of IT Cosmetics. Okay, her voice, pretty big is now a lot of people have said this about me too, so I'm not throwing stones in a glass house, but her voice drives me crazy. It is a valley girl with all of that. What do they call that? Throat.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

Whatever it is building their confidence and their self esteem. A word that I use a lot with them is yet you know, and how to reframe things for a kid when they're like, I can't do it. I can't do it yet.

[Chrissy Oatley]

No, I'm not.

[Brian Greene]

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the Commercial break. I'm Brian Greene, this is my dear friend and the co host of this show, Chris and Joy Oatley. Best to you Chris.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Best to you Brian.

[Brian Greene]

Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Good to have you back in studio. Yes. After a little absence, short week last week. Little absence. My wife was very upset with me because yesterday I mentioned that we had MRSA running around the house and she said, what will all the people at the school think? And I said we're covered in open wounds. What do you think they think we have leprosy. No, I'm kidding. It's all done. It's all gone. We're all good. We've now recovered from our, our bout with staph and encephalitis and staff infection. We did. It was kind of a perfect storm. I think we might have picked it up at Disney and then got worse when we went down to south Florida in 107 degree heat with 99.9% humidity.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. Nothing grows there.

[Brian Greene]

Nothing. Not a thing.

[Chrissy Oatley]

No kind of viruses?

[Brian Greene]

No. You? I had property in Florida because somebody else that I knew was rich and paid for it and I was in charge of managing it. Not because I was like some big, you know, real estate mogul, but for a short period of time I had real estate down in Florida. And the things you would have to do to even the inside of the property to ensure that literal dinosaur fungus would not grow on the inside of your toilet was amazing. You were constantly using harsh chemicals to ensure you couldn't open the door. Like it was a whole thing. So yes, South Florida is full of flora and fungi, if you will. Flora, fauna and fungi. Chrissy. But I'm happy to report that it's all gone. Yes, the three Fs, the fucking, the fighting and the forgetting. It's all gone. Everybody's feeling better now. Everyone's on the mend. I think all the open wounds have managed to close themselves. But I'll tell you what I noticed when I went. You know, I've been to 16 to 17 different school related activities in just the last two weeks. Why the kids haven't even been in school for one day and we need a parent teacher conference. What could you possibly know about my kid yet? You've seen him for five hours and let me. And maybe they want to get prepped and let me. So let me give you the lowdown. They're going to be terrible. They're going to tax your every nerve. They're miserable.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, yours are not.

[Brian Greene]

I love them. Yeah, you have to go to so many meetings at the beginning of the year. Orientations and teacher meetings and security and what do we do with this? And tornado drills. And it just seems like a lot.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Of it seems like it's a lot.

[Brian Greene]

More than when we were precursor activity to just going to school. Like, I don't remember my parents ever going to any kind. Maybe they did and I just wasn't aware of it. I think maybe an orientation, like the.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Orientation and parent teacher conferences, but.

[Brian Greene]

God, I hated those parent teacher conferences, Chrissy. Nothing filled me quite like dread after the fourth grade because I remember angel, so. But were you really.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I was.

[Brian Greene]

Were you a prissy student? Like a. I was a good student. Prissy Prancer, as I like to call my daughters. You're Prissy Prancers in there and you do everything correctly. Let me share with you that I was not. This may come as a surprise to anybody who listens to the show, but I was a total shithead. And while I wasn't like a troublemaker, I didn't go out and like, you know, beat up kids. I wasn't a bully or anything like that.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I just got into mischief.

[Brian Greene]

I was mischievous. Yes. I found that the only kind of attention that I would get was when I was being funny or clownish. And so I would do that, not in a disruptive way, but. But that would lead to mischief that then would lead to some kind of trouble. Like 20 to 50 pixie sticks in a hotel air conditioner on a overnight trip. On the one overnight trip we took in all of grade school.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, that's kind of an honest kid mistake though, really. I mean, you just don't. You don't. You can't grasp at that age that stuff really will cause damage to things. Unless you did know that and you did it anyways.

[Brian Greene]

I think I was a pretty sharp tool. I don't know what happened over the years. I've lost that, but I think I was a pretty sharp tool. I think I understood that what we were doing in the moment was not the best thing that we could be doing. And it most likely would be frowned upon should anybody figure it out. What gets me every time. And I guess I don't know what we would have cleaned it up with, but we did all this damage to this hotel room and then thought nothing of cleaning it. We actually left it that way for everybody to find in the morning. We fell asleep on the pizza and pixie stick covered, you know, beds, and then woke up in the morning Thinking.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Hopped up on all that sugar.

[Brian Greene]

That's what I think it was. I think it was just a sugar high. And the sugar will give the kids a high, that's for sure.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Greene]

But I dreaded nothing, nothing more than a parent teacher conference night. I dreaded it because I wasn't the best student academically. I didn't apply myself. I very rarely did my homework, if ever. And the teachers, while I always felt like I had some kind of relationship with the teachers. See, I like to make the students laugh, and then I like to make the teachers laugh too.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

So I think they thought I was a friendly kid. But you know, parents only suffer so much bullshit. Like adults only suffer so much bullshit from kids. Like, I know my kid will avoid brushing his teeth all night long if he can just have a conversation with me about Disney or he can make me laugh or he can point out something that he's done. But I see right through it. I see what you're doing. That's right, you're avoiding your. Of brushing your teeth. So eventually the suffering of the. They will suffer no more. And so I just remember that distinct feeling of dread when my parents would say, so and so is coming to babysit you because it's parent teacher conference night. And then I always knew there was going to be a lecture after they got home, shortly after they got home, after the babysitter was shuffled off back to her house and my dad came in the door. I knew it was gonna be a sit down conversation. And it happened almost exclusively every time after fourth or fifth grade. By the time I got to high school, I don't even think my dad bothered showing up anymore.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Parent teacher conference meetings.

[Brian Greene]

I think he felt like, why am.

[Wallet (Personification)]

I taking this chip?

[Brian Greene]

Why am I, why am I responsible for this? He's a grown man. Let him do his own thing.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I don't really remember them in high school.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, maybe. Oh, maybe that was just my parents being called in individually.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Right.

[Brian Greene]

Maybe that was just my dad being called in individually. I do remember, I do remember my parents being called in.

[Chrissy Oatley]

There was a particular time that you stands out.

[Brian Greene]

I think I've told this story. Maybe I have. And I'll share, I'll share. In case I haven't. I was a freshman. I had a English teacher, like, you know, English literature teacher. She was on the younger side. I still remember her name. I won't give it here, but she was on the younger side. So maybe she was in her 20s and she wasn't like, you know, hot for teacher. Kind of hot. But she was one of the younger teachers at a Catholic school. And so I think some of the guys thought that she was attractive and she was friendly with some of the girls.

[Chrissy Oatley]

She was like the cool teacher.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, she was the cool teacher. And I remember me and this teacher had a connection. I think she gave a shit about me. I think she knew that my home life was a little bit troubled at the time. She reached out, she tried to help. I remember a couple of different occasions when there were outside school activities where she would be like a football game or there was a waffle. You know, we would go to Waffle House all the time, smoke cigarettes and drink coffee. She would show up on occasion there. It wasn't unusual at that time. Listen, this was different kind of petoing. It wasn't like, you know, Jeffrey Epstein kind of thing. It was just like, you know, light slap on the ass kind of, you're light P doing, if you will. And she. She showed up at the Waffle House on a couple different occasions and would sit there while we were smoking cigarettes and talk to us. And so she was the cool teacher. But when we got to sophomore year, I ended up in her class again for English Lit. And halfway through the year, I remember that my parents were called in. My mom went to the school, and about a week later, I was. I was moved out of that classroom into a different teacher's classroom.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh.

[Brian Greene]

And my mom, without explanation, they just said, you've got a new. You know, Brian, you're going to a new. You're going to this class now for. And I thought, what? I like that teacher. Why am I doing that? It's just a change of schedule. That's the way it is. That's what you're going to do. Okay. And my mom told me a couple weeks later that when she was called in, she was called in because there was some discomfort around the relationship that the teacher had specifically with me and that they felt it was best that I be in another classroom.

[Chrissy Oatley]

The authorities, the higher ups, the school, the school had some reservations.

[Brian Greene]

And I don't know if that came from the teacher herself or. I mean, I was certainly wasn't like hitting on the teacher. I mean, 15 years old, am I hitting on a teacher? I wasn't hitting on the teacher. I believe this may have been coming from other people in the school. Maybe she was getting a little too close for comfort at times with some of the students. And I was targeted. You're part of the group. I was part of the group. And of course I was part of the group. I was always part of the group that was targeted for discipline. Yeah, yeah. I was like a poster child for discipline. They had a disciplinary officer at my school. Like, did you have one of those at your school?

[Chrissy Oatley]

I don't really remember that. No.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, I remember we had a demerit system. Did you have a demerit system?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, I remember, like the kids getting an in school suspension, like that kind of thing.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, no, so we had demerit. So, like, if your tie wasn't a certain length, if you were not in your classroom within a minute of the bell.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. Demerits.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. If you were smoking a cigarette in your car, you could get demerits and like, three demerits equaled, I don't know, you couldn't go to the football game or something, you know, five demerits was a detention.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Sure.

[Brian Greene]

Ten demerits was an in school suspension. Or you could go straight to suspension and don't. Do not pass. Go. Yeah, yeah, that was one of those things. That's right. And so there was a disemponary officer that was like. Her job was to run around. And she was like a former nun. Her job was to run around making people miserable, essentially. I remember her name, too. And she was universally disliked by everybody at the school. Of course she was. But especially universally disliked by the troublemaking crowd of which I was a part.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Your crew.

[Brian Greene]

That's right, by my crew. She had eyes on us all the time. We all the time. She would go to cars and look for packs of cigarettes is what she would do.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Wow.

[Brian Greene]

Even though it was not particularly uncommon. This is how old I am. It was not particularly uncommon at that time for high school students to smoke cigarettes.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, no. I remember the smoking happening in the bathroom and stuff like that.

[Brian Greene]

At our campus, at our high school campus. The year before we got there was the year that they banned smoking on campus. They had long time ago banned smoking inside the building.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

But the students could still go outside into the common area or outside into the front of the school, Outside the front of the school and smoke cigarettes. So that my freshman, and sometimes in my sophomore year, you could still find people out in the lawn in the front of the school smoking cigarettes. The seniors and the juniors. I think the seniors got an exemption. They were smoking cigarettes. But all of us smoke. Everybody smoked cigarettes. It seemed like at some point or another. But because you could not smoke them on the campus anymore, if you were smoking in your car, then you could get a demerit. And I remember that lady walking around our cars trying to see if she could find cigarette boxes, you know, boxes of cigarettes so she could potentially give us a demerit. Fucker. I mean, honestly.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, I guess it was her job.

[Brian Greene]

It was her job. So I don't have to worry about any of that. None of my kids are over the age of, you know, eight, so I'm not worried about that quite yet. Yeah, but I'm already at parent teacher conferences. Right. You know, I don't particularly know what we're talking about the first day of school. What are we doing?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Is it just a kind of set up? What is going to happen?

[Brian Greene]

This is very much both the schools that all the children attend. There's two different schools because they're in two different age groups. They, they're very, they have a very family feel to them. And so everyone is very involved. And I like that. I think that's very important. It's something I did not have with my parents. The schools I went to were not like that. They didn't have class moms, they didn't have any of that stuff. Right. They have room mothers. The PTA wasn't non existent. Parents would just sometimes get together in groups and do stuff for fall festival or whatever. But very few of those things happened either. But at one particular school that one of some of my children go to, it's like every weekend there's a different thing. Yeah, we went. So it's a, it's a half week, right? It's the start. It's a half week. You have one day as orientation.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Ease them back in, ease them back in.

[Brian Greene]

Then the next day they go to school. But it's a fun day and they're there and they're figuring out their classrooms. They're not really doing much. And then the next day is a full day of school and they're kind of getting used to any new classrooms, new teachers, new students. Everyone's having a good time, saying hello to each other. And, and in those three days, the parents have like three different things to attend. But then on Friday night there is a picnic, like a family picnic. All these grades come and we're going to put out a huge inflatable water slide. Bouncy houses, bouncy houses. We're going to cook hot dogs, we're going to have food, games, activities. The teachers are going to paint faces, we're going to play music. And all the kids are just going to go out there and party. And one of my Kids comes home super excited about this, but I'm clueless because I don't. Do you think Brian pays attention to that calendar? No, he does not. But he's like, we have to go. We have to go. And I think to myself, what are we talking about? I don't know anything about a family fun night. I have plans. I have to put you to bed. I have to put you to bed. How could we? This is bedtime. How can we do this? But we go and it's like, a ton. The kids are fucking having such a great time. They're out there in the mud and the grass and riding down this, you know, water slide that's full of additional cell manila and encephalitis and eating hot dogs and getting their faces painted and running around with their friends. And I just think to myself, this was not my education. This was not my experience as a child. And if I had had even a touch of this, like where my parents came to the school and they were involved in family fun night and painting faces and having hot dogs and going down water slides, that maybe I would have enjoyed school a little bit more. Maybe it would have been something I actually would have looked forward to attending.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Absolutely. I remember my mom was involved. She was like room mother once or twice, and she'd put together things and. Yeah, there were. There was pta. There was a lot of stuff. My dad wasn't that involved, but my mom was.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, but your dad was working, right?

[Chrissy Oatley]

He was. And there were three girls, and. Yeah, it was a lot.

[Brian Greene]

So your mom was a part of the school. She was, like, in touch. She was there.

[Chrissy Oatley]

She was in touch. Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. I think that also has something to do with my personal relationship with school and whether or not I felt like it was something I, you know.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

Family. Ish. Even though I went to a Catholic school. Right. I mean, let's be honest about it. I went to a Catholic school. It's not like, you know, Catholic schools have a reputation for a reason.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. There's a bunch of Mormon fuzzy.

[Brian Greene]

It depends on which teacher you have. And I think things may be different now, but back then, there were still nuns and priests that were teaching inside of the school. I'm sure there are still priests and nuns that are somewhat attached to the school.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

But back then, it was more like a. Kind of like a military.

[Chrissy Oatley]

It kind of sounds like it every time you talk about it.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. It wasn't, like, warm and fuzzy and I just don't remember. Maybe there were a bunch of after school Activities for families and stuff like that and we just didn't happen to go to them. It was also 20 miles away from my house so I think my dad was just kind of tired. At the end of the day he's like, I'm not driving all the way. Yeah, fucking down down to take you to family fun night. I'll cook some hot dogs here. I'm going to go up and watch the Bulls game and you can crank up your guitar and annoy the rest of the house. How's that Brian? Okay. But I just look at these schools now and I think to myself this is, you know, for whatever shitty things are going on in today's society and the education system is broken and it's, you know, a place is really terrible. There are certain things that I think we've made leaps and bounds on and one of those is the parents are involved.

[Chrissy Oatley]

The involvement. Well I think that's a generational thing too.

[Brian Greene]

I think you might be right about that.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. Because I think you know, with the generations before it was kind of like eh, go out and play and do your thing and mommy's going to take her helpers.

[Brian Greene]

But mommy's taking her little helpers. Yeah, I'll be here smoking cigarettes.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, exactly. So I think it's just a different mindset too especially too with the advent of social media, you know.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, true.

[Chrissy Oatley]

There's got to show those cute pictures.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, there's a fucking WhatsApp.

[Chrissy Oatley]

You're going to be shamed if you don't.

[Brian Greene]

There you go. And listen, you know I all valid great points. I also think that now parents in general are more involved in their parent in their students life for some good and some bad. I understand that, you know there could that you got to be careful about helicopter parenting and that's a real fine line and sometimes I don't even know where it lies. I'm not claiming to be an expert on that. I'm sure aside baby my children at times too much and then I'm sure I'm probably like my dad in some ways in other places. But school is not a drop off zone. Right. It's a place where you, you're accepting my children. That's my flesh and blood. Like I, I want to be involved in some way shape or form and I get it. Not every parent can be like that. Sometimes you just have to go out there and hustle and make a living and make sure your kids are also financially taken care of. It's not for every parent to be that involved in in school. And if we couldn't go to the family fun night because something else was more important, we wouldn't have gone. Yeah, but I went. And I just like, I'm making the comparisons in my. Always comparing my own experience to my children's experience and thinking to myself, holy shit, just one water slide in my life. Just one encephalitis filled mud flopped. You know, dead grass filled, swampy water. Water slide. And my whole educational career could have been different. I could have been a doctor or a lawyer or a QuickBooks expert.

[Chrissy Oatley]

An accountant.

[Brian Greene]

An accountant. All right, well, listen, last week we had a ton of fun because we only recorded for like one hour last week. So we had a ton of fun doing nothing, basically. But we got a lot of great feedback about two of our guests. I'd like to talk more about them, Chrissy, if you don't mind. Brett Gelman. And then we followed it up right, with Dusty Slay. And then I want to talk about the royal family of Norway, who are causing quite a stir. Have you heard about all of this?

[Chrissy Oatley]

I've heard a little bit about some.

[Brian Greene]

Stuff, but there's some very bad boys and girls in Norway in that Norway. Some criminals, straight up criminals. What's that?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Are there affairs going on or affairs.

[Brian Greene]

And nor and princesses marrying dun dun dun dun black guys. But then there's like real, like, you know, rapists and stuff like that. So Norway, listen, we were all paying attention to Harry and twiddle and twaddle over there, having, you know, having a fight in the front grounds of Windsor Castle. And what we should have been paying attention to was Norway. That's where the real drama is happening. We'll take a break. We'll talk more about it.

[Rachel (Voice of God)]

Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on tcb. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue. Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears. And I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail. Speaking of mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to tcbpodcast.com and visiting the Contact Us page. You can also find the entire commercial break library audio and video, just in case you want to look at [e-mail] Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-4333, TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Tell us how much you love us, and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you could make fun of us. That'd be fine too. We might not air that, but maybe. Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text. We'll respond. Now I'm gonna go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break.

[Brian Greene]

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. I'm out on our little break. I'm over at the local coffee shop and I'm talking to one of the people behind the counter and they say, I want to start my own podcast. To which I reply, you already have more listeners than we do. But their question to me was, what do I need in order to launch a podcast? Three things. A microphone, an idea, and a website. And our good friends at Squarespace, they have the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're creating content, selling something, offering a service, or just want to keep people informed about your comings and goings, you can build your website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. And if a website is a building block of a business, what's the building blocks of the website? Two things in my opinion. Number one, design. You gotta have a good looking design and Squarespace has a collection of cutting edge design tools that anyone can use to build a website that fits your brand perfectly. Number two, building block, you have to be found. As I've often said about podcasting, if you want to be heard, you have to get found. No different out there on the World Wide Web. In search engine optimization is the key to doing that. While some companies and services may charge thousands or tens of thousands of dollars for search engine optimization, it's included with every single website on Squarespace. And the great news about all of this is you do not have to be some designer, programmer, search engine optimization expert. Squarespace is designed to help me build a website and if I can do it, you can do it. I'm really not all that smart. Go to squarespace.com commercial to save 10% off your purchase of a website or domain using the code commercial and start building your business or grow the one that you have or refresh that multibillion dollar conglomerate squarespace.com commercial and when you're ready to launch, make sure to use the code commercial. And thank you to Squarespace for always being a sponsor of the commercial break.

[Lena Dunham]

Hello, it's Lena Dunham. I host A podcast called the C Word with my dearest friend and historian.

[Brian Greene]

Of bad behavior, Alyssa Bennett.

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[Lena Dunham]

It's a chat show about women whose.

[Brian Greene]

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[Lena Dunham]

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[Chrissy Oatley]

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[Brian Greene]

Okay, so last week we had two different guests that we pushed out. You know, we recorded Dusty on Thursday. We usually takes us at least a week to get the guests interviews out just because of all the editing that needs to be done and video and stuff like that. But we decided to flip it around real quick and we've only had Dusty out for a day and people are really excited about Dusty Slay and his interviews. We have a lot more Dusty Slay fans than I would have anticipated that we have.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I really liked him a lot.

[Brian Greene]

Did you check out Wet Heat?

[Chrissy Oatley]

I did some of it. I haven't watched. I haven't had the chance to watch the whole thing.

[Brian Greene]

When Astrid asked me about a year and a half ago or whenever. When did the Nate Bargazzi special come out? About a year ago?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, about a year ago.

[Brian Greene]

Okay. So about a year ago Astrid said, you want to do a Netflix and chill night with me and we'll watch Nate Bargazzi. I like him now. I knew Nate was the guy from Naetland. I knew Nate was a very popular comedian. I'd seen many, many of his social media reels. But he never really struck me as like my favorite comedian. And that's I'm just an honest opinion, right? I was always like, yeah, he's funny, you know, but you know, sometimes you just like you vibe with a certain type of comedy or music or whatever.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Huh.

[Brian Greene]

It wasn't that instant. I didn't fall in love. It wasn't love at first sight, Chrissy. Okay, but then Astrid said you wanted Netflix and chill with the Nate special. And I said, okay, you know, sometimes you got to watch stuff because your. Your wife likes it or your husband likes it. So we watch that special, and it takes me about 20 minutes to even get into what's going on, because Nate does that. He's at least in this special. He started off so slow and plotting and thoughtful and pensive and a lot of space in between words. And I thought to myself, okay, well, I guess we're in for a night of, you know, six seconds in between each word Nate's gonna say. But by 20 minutes in, I was really laughing so fucking hard. Because Nate uses his body, his eyes, and his words economically in a way where he's. It's like we're fish. There's a hook in our mouth, and he's yanking us in the. Exactly in the direction that we want to go. He's a. A tactician, as I. As I think. As I think. Yeah. As I believe Dusty is. And he really got me not one or ass in the entire thing. I don't think. I don't think there's any curse words in it. Which, again, not. Is not my. Like, I wouldn't say that I'm. I'm a guy who likes clean comedy necessarily. If it's good, it's good.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, that's the thing. I don't feel like I'm one way or the other. But, you know, if it's funny to me, then. Then it's funny.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, that's right. It's like, you know, gay porn, straight porn. I could really do either or as long as it's good. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Exactly.

[Brian Greene]

Usually women porn when it's gay, but you don't understand what I'm saying. Okay? So the same thing happened to me with the first Dusty Slay Special, and now the second Dusty Slay Special. I think it starts off a little bit more poppy. He's less economical with his words. He's not as slow and thoughtful as Nate is. Nate's got a very unique delivery, but Dusty's very good at what he does. And I thought, that's special. If we're going to give it a score, I'm going 8.75 out of 10.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Okay?

[Brian Greene]

If, like, you know, George Carlin at the Met is like a 10 out of 10, or Mitch Hedberg is a 10 out of 10, then I'm going 8.75. 8.75, Chrissy.

[Chrissy Oatley]

That's a high score.

[Brian Greene]

It's a high score, but he's got to have some room to improve there because, you know, he's got a new hour and we got to see what he does there.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, he's already doing new stuff.

[Brian Greene]

He's already doing new stuff on tour. So I just wanted to share with everybody. I think it's well worth an hour and some change of your time to go watch Dusty's special. And I don't usually. I mean, sometimes we do, but it's not every guest, it's not every comedian where I go and follow up with another recommendation to go watch his special. But I thought it was. I thought it was very good. And people apparently like him. People apparently like him because they're texting right away. That's another thing is usually don't. People don't text at all. But now that we have Dusty on, they want to text us, tell us how wonderful Dusty is.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, I'm so glad we were able to make it work.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, I'm so glad something finally got you to text the commercial break. Thanks for that. And then Brett Gelman. And what do we say about Brett Gelman that he hasn't already said himself about himself? Brett Gelman is a star in one of the most popular shows on Earth and people instantly recognize him and they got very excited about Brett being on the show. Stranger.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. And I have to say, I watched his show that he was talking about during the interview.

[Brian Greene]

I did, too.

[Chrissy Oatley]

It is interesting.

[Brian Greene]

I like Brett.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I love Brett. And I loved parts of the special. That's not a special. What, six episodes?

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, I think that's being very judicious. I think that's being very judicious.

[Chrissy Oatley]

It was very different, but he's still him in it. And so that part was funny. And there were certainly some other parts. It is. It's like nothing I've ever seen before. Horror, comedy. Horror and comedy.

[Brian Greene]

Horror drama, mystery and a little of the.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Of the.

[Brian Greene]

Not the occult, but a Kadristomy, if you will. It's a cadristomy on Amazon.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Supernatural, maybe.

[Brian Greene]

Yes, they're in there. It. Brett told us, you know, we spend a few minutes with the guests before you. Before the part you hear. And then after the part you hear usually, you know, saying salutations and greetings just to make sure that, you know, we're not totally raw dogging the interview. We want to say, hey, welcome to the show. I'm Chrissy. I'm Brian. Here. How's. Here's how it's going to go. Let us know if there's anything you do or don't want to talk About. And usually that leads to a little bit of rapport beforehand. And Brett said to us, I've got this new show. I've been toiling with it for five years, and finally somebody bought it. And I'm telling you right now, it's probably going to be the weirdest thing you've ever seen in your entire life. I've been. I'm very proud of it, but I don't exactly know how to explain it. You know, it's a vampire drama, murdered comedy. And I'm like, oh, okay, right up my alley. Sounds right up my alley. But I'm not sure it was right up my alley. I'm just being honest.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I know.

[Brian Greene]

I thought it was. It's watchable, for sure.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I can see why it took a while to sell it.

[Brian Greene]

I can see why some executives sat in a room, watched it, and thought to themselves, huh, huh? How are the analytics going to deliver this one?

[Chrissy Oatley]

I like the fact that there was no previous form. It was a formulaic show.

[Brian Greene]

No, that's for sure. It's not a. It's not a Seinfeld episode. It's not a show about nothing, that's for sure. It's a weird, strange mishmash of a bunch of different stuff. And I think there are some moments to great effect. But then I think there are some moments and maybe I just need to watch the thing all the way through.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, yes.

[Brian Greene]

Did you watch it all the way through?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, Jeff did. I left him with it because I had to go be somewhere. He was like, really? Then. Now I have to continue watching this to see what happens.

[Brian Greene]

And did he finish?

[Chrissy Oatley]

He filled me in when I got back, and he was like, yeah, it continued down the same vein.

[Brian Greene]

Well, listen, Brett was great, by the way.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Brett is incredible.

[Brian Greene]

Brett is great. And there's going to be hits and misses, and not everybody's going to like everything. And I think Chrissy and I in some ways have this similar sensibilities, so maybe it's just not for us. But you go watch it.

[Chrissy Oatley]

You go watch it.

[Brian Greene]

Art is interpretive, very interpretive. And Brett is. Been in so many things. Just all the stuff that he did on Adult Swim I think makes him worthy of any conversation and welcome back anytime. But then on top of that, his Stranger Things turn, which I'm excited to.

[Chrissy Oatley]

See that coming up. It's going to take up the whole holidays. Right?

[Brian Greene]

That's what I. That's kind of the reason why I brought this up is because, you know, we put a reel out and then I thought about this one more time. It takes some real fucking cahoots's, some huge banana leafs for the executives at Netflix to say, you know what we're gonna do? We're gonna ruin your Christmas, we're gonna ruin your Thanksgiving. And on top of that, we're gonna ruin your new year by releasing the world's favoritest show on those three days so that you have no time to spend with your family. And everybody's gonna be watching Stranger Things because that's what's going to happen.

[Chrissy Oatley]

And maybe it together. Maybe that was their thinking.

[Brian Greene]

Hey, listen, that too. But there's going to be guys and girls who want to watch football and have to make a big decision about which one. I guess the good news is on.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Streaming you can play at any time.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, I wonder. There's probably a lot of guys out there who are going to watch Stranger Things first and then watch the football game on repeat. I mean it takes a lot of balls to put this up against the sports and the other traditional things that you watch on Thanksgiving like football, basketball, on, on Christmas, the Thanksgiving Day parade, New Year's Eve celebrations, or all of the bowl games that'll be on January 1st. This is a, this is a, this is a fuck you to the conventional entertainment industry, I think is what this is.

[Chrissy Oatley]

When you've got a hit milk it.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, but you got to know, you gotta, you gotta know for sure you got the numbers to compete, to pull people away from other stuff. And so Netflix must. And they don't give away their streaming numbers. So you don't really know. Are a billion people watching every season? Are the 300 million people. But I think if I'm not mistaken, Stranger Things is one of the most streamed television shows in history. I think, you know, Seinfeld and other stuff like that certainly have. In the Office they came out with.

[Chrissy Oatley]

A new office or a new type of office show. Did you see that? It's called the Paper.

[Brian Greene]

Really?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. And so it's about, you know, they're doing that same documentary style thing.

[Brian Greene]

Is this the follow up that what's her Name was talking about on our show? Is it by Greg Daniels?

[Chrissy Oatley]

I don't know but it's like it's very, very similar take on this. And the Oscar plays a role in it too.

[Brian Greene]

Oh, he does?

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. I just watched the trailer for it the other day.

[Brian Greene]

The Paper show. Let me see the follow up to the Office. The Paper one season. And where is this going? Where can we see this? Chrissy.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Peacock, maybe I don't even know for sure that's actually out yet? Cause I went to go watch it, and I think it's coming soon.

[Brian Greene]

Alex Edelman is in it. This is the official following up on the story. The Office. The documentary crew that immortalized Dunder Mifflin Scranton branch discovers a disappearing Midwest newspaper and the publisher trying to revive it with reporters. This mockumentary files that follows the daily lives and dreams of blah, blah, blah.

[Chrissy Oatley]

It looks pretty funny, but it's on Peacock. It's be hard to recreate that same magic.

[Brian Greene]

There's going to be no chance that they recreate that. I'm gonna get. I'll give it a chance.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I'll give it a chance too. Like I said, Oscar's in it.

[Brian Greene]

Okay, ready? Let's listen.

[Chrissy Oatley]

And I like the one that Oscar's like, no fucking way I'm doing this again.

[Brian Greene]

Okay. Innovate sells products made out of paper, toilet tissue, toilet seat protectors, and local newspapers. And that is in order of quality.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

Here is one of my articles I'm particularly proud of.

[Brian Greene]

I'm scrolling and I'm scrolling and I'm learning a lot. Okay.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

All right.

[Chrissy Oatley]

It's got potential.

[Brian Greene]

I'm 30 seconds in and I see where this is going. All right. Okay. I'll. I'll give it a. A Jander. The thing about. The thing about, like, I hope it does great. It's hard to make magic happen twice, to lightning strike twice in the exact same tone and texture that it did. Few movies have done it. Even fewer television shows have done it. I mean, think of a sequel television show that's really, really done well. Which one is that? You know, I. I can't think of it. Spongebob Square. I mean, I don't know. I don't know which sequel television show that I can even think of that did well at all. So my opinion is, like, go for it. You know? West Wing is one of my favorite television shows of all time.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yes.

[Brian Greene]

And for decades now, almost, they've been talking about rebooting the West Wing.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Better Call Saul. That I can think.

[Brian Greene]

Okay. Okay.

[Chrissy Oatley]

But it's very rare.

[Brian Greene]

It's very rare. And even though the stories marry at the end, you know the ending point, you see where it's going. You understand what the end is going to be. It is so original. It is. There is so much difference in the two television shows besides the one character or the couple characters that marry those universes. It is so much different in a lot of ways that. But it stands on its own. You could never watch Breaking Bad and watch Better Call Saul and only would need to understand the ending of Breaking Bad. Maybe the last five episodes. Four episodes. But this seems like a carbon copy. But then again, the Office was a carbon copy of another television show called the Office.

[Chrissy Oatley]

This is true.

[Brian Greene]

And did much better than the original Office. Even though a lot of people point to the original. I didn't like the original Office. That was my.

[Chrissy Oatley]

The mine. It wasn't my thing either. I tried.

[Brian Greene]

I thought it was a little mean spirited where there was something very soft and sweet about. And I.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, the Steve Carell. I mean, that's the thing. You get Steve Carell with the original Office and he's just. He's one of a kind.

[Brian Greene]

Steve Carell.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. It's hard. It's gonna be hard to drop that type of character into the new one.

[Brian Greene]

Jim, Pam, Steve, Dwight Schrute. And then fill it in with all the background characters that did such a fucking fantastic job. Each and every one of them becomes their own little nugget, their own little jewelry. You want to hear what they have to say each time they pop up on screen? You're happy that they're there. There's not a dud in the group. Like even Kelly Kapowski. Oh, I want to see Kelly Kapowski.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah. No, all of them were fantastic.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. So here's to hoping that they find the same kind of chemistry. But that chemistry also. There's a magic that happens there. What's her name? What was her name was on the show.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yes.

[Brian Greene]

Meredith. I can't remember her name now. Why can't I remember her name? Anyway, Meredith. The lady who played Meredith was on our show and she said, if I had one regret in life, it's that I didn't sit in those moments. Sit in that. Like when we were filming, when we were there, when we were the hottest thing since sliced bread, and realize what a magic moment this really is. That you don't usually get this twice. Right. All these people making this kind of television history in a way that is really gelling and you just kind of sit there and absorb it. So here's to hoping.

[Chrissy Oatley]

We'll see.

[Brian Greene]

I hope.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Sorry I took you off topic, though. We were just talking about streaming. Streaming and shows and the Office.

[Brian Greene]

Yes. Well, here's what I was going to say about. About streaming. My larger point about streaming and television is that the television is really finally, officially broken. It's just broken. Late night television is soon to be gone. I don't think Jimmy Kimmel will renew his contract. We already Know what's happening at the Late Show. The great, great Late show with Stephen Colbert is unfortunately. We can all argue about reasons, but is unfortunately no longer going to be around.

[Chrissy Oatley]

He's got to pop up somewhere else.

[Brian Greene]

He will be on a podcast, and it will be on video, and he will be probably as popular as. Conan needs a friend. It. You know, Conan did the right thing.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

Conan went where the. The. Where the viewership was. Earballs. Were. And he has largely made a ton of fucking money and gotten all the cachet that he needs doing a podcast, just like we do. He's. He has exactly the same amount of cachet that the commercial break does. Yes, Conan, open invitation to come on the show. I don't even think I. You know, we get a lot of people on this show, but I don't even think Conan's people accept our phone calls when we say, hey, can you go get Conan? I don't even think they return emails because they see us as a threat, Chrissy. That's why. Really? Okay. But everybody's gone. Stern is probably likely the old guard of television and radio. Television and radio are officially dead. Podcasting, vodcasting, whatever the fuck we're calling it these days, is the new medium and streaming. But Netflix accomplished something that I think even they may not have intended to do, and that is break television. It will never be the same again. And I say that because late night is a beloved format, but it hasn't been relevant in years. Yeah, and Jimmy Kimmel.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Well, a lot of people aren't watching the main networks anymore, except for sports.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, that's it. And that's really the only reason television exists. Those, like, channels exist. Reruns, sports and prestige tv. That said, if you give them a reason to come, like a Breaking Bad or a Better Call Saul, you'll get them to show up once a fucking week. Otherwise, stream it and try and figure out how to get someone to pay 499amonth for it. We tried to get someone to figure out how to pay 499amonth for this. We got one. One subscriber, one guys. Now, granted, that was episode 10 when we were trying to do that, but. All right, we're way past the break. Let's take a break. Shop tcb, podcast.com. the window is closing this Friday, so if you do not order your march by March your merch by this Friday, then unfortunately for you, you will not be able to order the merch. And don't come at begging and asking me whether you can get the merch. And do you have any extra? Because we won't. We don't. We're not giving it to you. You. You have to buy it this time, but maybe next time we'll give it to you. Okay, we'll take a break. We'll be back.

[Rachel (Voice of God)]

Let me do something Brian has never done.

[Brian Greene]

Be brief.

[Rachel (Voice of God)]

Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break, text or call us 212-4333 TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Visit our website tcbpodcast.com for all the audio, video and your free sticker. Then watch all the [e-mail] thecommercial break and finally, share the show. It's the best gift you could give a few aging podcasters. See, Brian, that really wasn't that difficult, now was it? You're welcome.

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[Brian Greene]

You know we have all been paying attention to Harry and Bob or whatever the other guy's name is and their wives and all the mischief that they've been up To. We have all been paying attention to them entirely too much, in my opinion. I said this one, you know.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah, I agree. I'm a big royal. No, like, obsessive royal person.

[Brian Greene]

But you know what I can get into? I can get into Meghan Markle with that girl on that podcast. Have you seen those clips going around? Let me. I'll play one for you. Okay, let me play one for you, Megan. Podcast. Interview. Interview. I don't even have to put her last name. It'll already know who I'm talking about. Here you go. Quote, unquote, the most insufferable conversation ever. Are you ready for this? Okay, here we go.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Great.

[Brian Greene]

Here's part one.

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

First question. Because I think in friendship, it's so important, and I think so many people also have this question for you is, you know, Megan, how are you? And are you okay?

[Brian Greene]

That's so kind.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I am.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

I'm better than okay. How are you?

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

I know you always make it about me today, which, by the way, I just have to say, you are the most generous friend. You show up for your friends today, I just get to talk about you. I'm excited.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Who is that?

[Brian Greene]

How are you doing? This is a girl that. I have no idea. We. I had no idea this. This person existed. Hold on. Let me see. Jamie Kern Lima, the host of the Jamie Kern Lena Show Podcast. Which is a terrible name for a podcast. The Jamie Kern Lima Show Podcast. Okay. All right. If that's not confusing enough, also a guest shark on Shark Tank, best selling author and founder of IT Cosmetics.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Okay.

[Brian Greene]

Her voice, pretty big is. Now, a lot of people have said this about me too, so I'm not throwing stones in a glass house, but her voice drives me crazy. It is a Valley girl with all of that. What do they call that? Throat. Whatever it is, you're building their confidence.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

And their self esteem. A word that I use a lot with them is yet, you know, and how to reframe things for kids when they're like, I can't do it. I can't do it yet.

[Chrissy Oatley]

No, I'm not good. Well, anyways, look, we're focused on her now. Let's.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

The more that you put into practice these ideas of like, put yet at the end of nearly every sentence and you feel like there's still hope and a promise that you can do it.

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

Yes.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

But when I type that to my children before I go to bed, guess what? Like, I'm teaching that to them or I'm reinforcing that, but I'm also reinforcing it for myself.

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

Yes.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

Like I don't know Yet.

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

Yet.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

I'm not sure.

[Jamie Kern Lima Interviewer]

I was just gonna say that applies to every adult. That applies to me right now. All of us.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

Yet. Oh, such a powerful word yet, Chrissy. We haven't gotten that 20 million dollar contract yet. Chrissy. No one, neither of us have been to jail yet, Chrissy. We haven't died yet. Yeah, it's on. It's in sufferable. So while we're all paying attention to these folks, guess what's happening in Norway.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Do tell.

[Brian Greene]

Nor the real drama. Okay.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I mean, it's cold there. They've got a cool train, I think that goes up through the Arctic Circle. They've got the northern lights. Give me some good stuff.

[Brian Greene]

Norway sounds like a great place, right? Home of beautiful, beautiful people, but apparently. And home to some of the most popular royals in the world by population. They are extraordinarily popular with their population, which is a very small population, by the way. Not a ton of people live in Norway.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I didn't realize they had royals still.

[Brian Greene]

They do. And don't ask me how it works. I don't know if it's a royal republic. I don't. Who fucking knows? I don't. I don't know. But Spain still has royals. Did you know that? But the son of Norway's crown prince, who is not, he's not a direct descendant of the royals. He is from a one night stand that she had with a formal former criminal before she met the friend. Oh, okay, this is, this is dramatic as it could come, but he's been in the spotlight since he was a child and he's been in trouble since he was a child. He's been arrested for drugs. He was arrested for assault. He's been, he's, he's been in all kind of trouble. Just yesterday he was arrested on four count. Him. Four counts of grape. I'm not going to say the word because then it'll get banned. Four counts of grape.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, I see what you're saying.

[Brian Greene]

Yes. And essay. So figure that one out too. This is how all the kids are doing it these days, so you don't get banned by YouTube. He admitted to causing bodily harm to a woman while he was under the influence of cocaine and alcohol. And he additionally had to pay restitution after he trashed an apartment that he was renting. This guy is like completely out of control. There's a picture of him.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh yeah, yeah, I've seen stuff about him.

[Brian Greene]

Anytime you got the dual earrings still in 2025. Either that's a Norway thing or you're just a troublemaker. I mean, I don't know anybody who wears two earrings anymore. But. Okay, but then that's not all, because then the sister of the Crown Prince is 48 years old. And about a couple years ago she came to America and she met a black man. A black man, right, is probably enough to cause a holster in Norway, I think. Now, I don't know, because I'm not claiming that Norway's a racist country. I don't know. I'm sure they have their prejudices just like every other country in the world, but you can imagine that the white is snow. Norway royal family.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I was gonna say they might just have a prejudice against anybody that's not blonde.

[Brian Greene]

True. That's true. Blonde and blue eyed, right? And I don't know that to be the truth either. I'm sure there are black people who live in Norway and are living, you know, perfectly fine. I'm not, I'm not gonna put words in anybody's mouth, but this has caused quite a stir amongst the tabloids and all this other stuff. And not only is there is this a mixed couple in a very stodgy royal family, but then go one step further and this guy claims to be a non human alien who can regenerate his own cells, limbs, eyeballs. He claims to be from an outer space, a different universe. He's clairvoyant and he's here to save the world. He is a guru, a clairvoyant guru out of California. He is a wild, wild character and he's marrying or married into the royal family. So now a direct descendant or a descendant. Not a direct descendant, but a descendant for the royal family where they spent over three and a half million dollars to get married in the beautiful slopes of Norway where Stevie Wonder played at the wedding. Okay, Stevie fucking Wonder. I love you, Stevie. I love you. Get your bag. Play that wedding with the alien regenerative.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Why not?

[Brian Greene]

It's insane. The story is insane.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Go off Norway.

[Brian Greene]

Go Norway. It was your time to step up. We haven't heard much from you in the last couple years.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Let's get some other royal scandals going on.

[Brian Greene]

The last time we heard from you, there were a couple of other American men running around trying to repopulate your. Wasn't that in Norway where all those ladies bought that sperm from that.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, was that in Norway?

[Brian Greene]

Was Norway or Sweden? Was it Norway or Sweden? I can't remember.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I thought it was Norway, Denmark or something like that.

[Brian Greene]

They were up there somewhere in the Nordic. And this is just awesome to be. I mean, I think this is so funny. And now the whole royal family's like popularity is just plunging and people are. People who were for the royals are now against the royals and the tabloids are going wild and the whole family is under scandal and scrutiny. I mean like we were. We're paying attention to Charles bickering with, you know, the two boys. And what we should have been paying attention to the whole time was the Norway. How do you call it? The Norrish. Are they Norwegian? Norwegian. There you go. Norrish.

[Chrissy Oatley]

They're Norrish.

[Brian Greene]

God, you're Norrish. The Norris royals are crazy. They're insane.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I love this. Yeah, I'm gonna turn on my alerts for that one.

[Brian Greene]

Let me see if I can read more about this, about this guy for you. Hold on one second.

[Chrissy Oatley]

I do remember reading about this, but all I saw was he was maybe like a self help guy.

[Brian Greene]

He's a self help guru. A life coach. Yeah, he's a life coach. But then he claims he can regenerate his own body.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Always goes well for those people that claim that.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, listen, I. I don't even know.

[Chrissy Oatley]

He might be the first though. Who knows?

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. Royal scandal wedding. Hold on one second. Yes.

[Chrissy Oatley]

How the Norris.

[Brian Greene]

Martha Louise's wedding. How? Princess Martha Louise's wedding to us. Shaman has stirred up Shaman.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Even better.

[Brian Greene]

Princess Martha Louise, 52 will marry celebrity shaman. I think this was. Yeah, I think this was last year. They got engaged. In 2019 and 2022, she dropped her duties as a royal to work on the couple's commercial interest. Let's see who is. I want to find out more about the guy. Local media locked out of the wedding. But it's rumored that Stevie. Netflix confirmed it's creating a documentary that follows the couple's story. Yes, good for you, Netflix. You may have broken tv, but at least you got the good documentaries they do. All right, and then who is this guy? We gotta find out the drama surrounding the wedding. To be fair, when Princess Martha got engaged, no one expected a run of the mill wedding. The daughter of King Harald and Queen Sonja, the fourth in line to the Norwegian throne, has always lived an unconventional lifestyle. A self proclaimed clairvoyant and alternative therapist. She once.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Oh, so she was already in that.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah, she was already in that world. She once opened up an angel school that taught healing techniques as well as how to contact your Celestial. Celestial.

[Chrissy Oatley]

She's the Teresa Kaputu. The Norway of the Norish.

[Brian Greene]

Yes. After much criticism in 2019, the Royal Court confirmed she would no longer be using her title as a princess during her business activities. In 2022, she stopped doing royal activities altogether. Meanwhile, Verrett, her husband, has battled accusations of promoting pseudoscience and has a long history of legal troubles. During the pandemic, Verrett came under fire for selling a medallion that he argued could ward off COVID 19. Yet even with all this considered, the lead up to the nuptials is causing more of an unexpected stir. Odd behavior, for instance, Verrett told news outlet. Although the couple was introduced by a mutual friend, they'd actually met in a past life.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yes, duh.

[Brian Greene]

I. Who hasn't? Yeah, I find I have memories of us in Egypt and she was my queen and I was a pharaoh, he told People magazine, the most reputable of magazines yet. Soon, papers began accusing the shaman of spreading misinformation. He's been talking about removing bad spirits from children, said a journalist for the Norwegian newspaper. In 2021, he left me a series of voicemails and tried to convince me of the existence of the Illuminati in Norway. It's kind of. It's kind of important that people know just how far outside the normal he is. Before I met him, Martha told Vanity Fair. I never thought there was any racism in Norway. Normally, the press office of the royal family will share images of a wedding to multiple news outlets at no cost due to public interest. However, the couple has insisted, hasn't said, decided to only give one publication an exclusive for their wedding. That will be with hello. Magazine.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Good old hello.

[Brian Greene]

They sold their wedding photos apparently for millions of dollars. This has caused quite the uproar with the press. To avoid conflict, the head of communications of the royal family has said that the rest of the Norwegian family will refrain from taking other photos at the wedding. Wow. It's just like that's the whole thing. Yeah, it's a. These. These two I want. These are the two I want to have on the show.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Definitely.

[Brian Greene]

I love you Dusty, but before I get a follow up with you, I want to have Queen Martha on the show. Yes, yes, Bella, make it happen. Make it. So Bella doesn't listen to our show, but if Bella did, I want Queen Martha and Vet on our show and see what's going on. I want to talk to them in their past lives and see what kind of.

[Chrissy Oatley]

They seem interesting spicing things up.

[Brian Greene]

Hey listen, there is a. There is a. A podcast out there and I'm not going to name the podcast because I. The guy has supposedly 13 million followers on Instagram, but I think about half a million of those might be real. If you know who I'm talk. If you know. You know, I K Y N K dy. And I think he's a total charlatan. But anyway, he has all these people on who claim they were past lives and they can, you know, speak to angels and weird beings. And he always makes these, like, clickbaity type reels. But every once in a while, I see a reel from his account and I'm like, I would like to have one of those people on. There's like, the people who speak it. They're in past lives and they're speaking as if they're the person in the past life.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Right, right, right.

[Brian Greene]

You know, kind of like, who's that famous person who did that once? What was her name? Wasn't there the lady who said she was the queen of. She was. Who was it? Not Mariel Hemingway. Not Marielle Hemingway. Do you know, I'm talking about.

[Chrissy Oatley]

She did say something about past life stuff.

[Brian Greene]

Yeah. Wasn't she like, you know, Cleopatra or something in a past life? And she showed up on Barbara Walters as Cleopatra. I think that stuff is so wild and I'd love to hear more about it, especially if it's the Queen of Norway. You. I mean, you just can't get much better.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Yeah.

[Brian Greene]

So anyway, the royal family of Norway, we're keeping an eye on you. You are on the radar of the commercial break. For good, bad or indifferent, we have you in our sights.

[Chrissy Oatley]

All right, I like it.

[Brian Greene]

Keeping an eye on it.

[Chrissy Oatley]

You can be the royal correspondent. Correspondent.

[Brian Greene]

I am going to be the royal correspondent Norway edition. Yes, I'm calling in. I'm calling in Queen Martha and Prince Verith for a parent teacher conference. Yes. Come to the commercial break. Come do the commercial and try and be on time. Respect our time. Okay? All right. No one's going to get that anyway. While we're speaking about it, since we were speaking about it much. Many thanks to Dusty Slay for coming in and to Brett, quite frankly, Dusty Slay dot com. Go listen to the interview. Watch the special. You know how to do it. When you get your gear, tag us in Instagram and we will throw you up on the Instagram. And we're going to be giving away some additional free merch, but you got to make sure you tag us on Instagram to do that. 212433 3TCB 212-433-3822. Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. We've been getting so many text messages. Chrissy, nice words for you. Nice words for Astrid. Mainly ignoring me and then telling us that they have in fact bought the merch. I got South Georgia Sean and a bunch of the regulars just letting us know that they're supporting the show. So very sweet of all of you.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Thank you.

[Brian Greene]

We really appreciate it. And I'd like to get South Georgia Sean on the show soon because he has some stories about catching an alligator or something.

[Chrissy Oatley]

He's gotta have just a wealth of stories.

[Brian Greene]

He sent me a picture the other day.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Day.

[Brian Greene]

And in a totally unmarried kind of way. He's a handsome dude. I'll show you the picture. He's a handsome dude. Not what you would expect. You would not expect this to be South Georgia Shaw. Anyway. All right. TCBpodcast.com that is the website. You can pre order the merch there. Also all the audio, all the video right there from one location at the corner, commercial break on Instagram to tag us and keep up with us and all that good stuff. And YouTube.com the commercial break for all the videos the same day they air here on the audio. Go follow and subscribe. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for now, I think. So tell you that I love you.

[Chrissy Oatley]

And I love you.

[Brian Greene]

That's to you. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say and we must say.

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[Chrissy Oatley]

Thanks for selling your car to Carvana. Here's your check.

[Brian Greene]

Whoa. When did I get here?

[Jamie Kern Lima]

What do you mean?

[Brian Greene]

I swear it was just moments ago that I accepted a great offer from Carvana online. I must have time traveled to the future. It was just moments ago.

[Chrissy Oatley]

We do same day pickup.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

Here's your check for that great offer.

[Brian Greene]

It is the future. It's. It's the present.

[Jamie Kern Lima]

And just the convenience of Carvana. Sorry to blow your mind.

[Brian Greene]

It's all good. Happens all the time.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Sell your car the convenient way to Carvana, pick up. Times may vary and fees may apply.

[Brian Greene]

What does possibility mean to you? Um, that's a hard question. Something that you can strive for. That I'm able to.

[Chrissy Oatley]

To do anything I set my mind to.

[Brian Greene]

You're confident in yourself and you believe in yourself.

[Chrissy Oatley]

Stuff that you could achieve.

[Brian Greene]

I feel it's. Sarah.

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[Brian Greene]

Shoes are a huge part of that. They are the most important part of my style.

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[Brian Greene]

Anything is possible. Dsw Countless shoes at bragworthy prices. Imagine the possibilities. Sam.