The Commercial Break – "Not All Of Us Are Well..."
Podcast: The Commercial Break
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley
Release Date: August 16, 2024
Episode Overview
This episode of The Commercial Break dives into the hosts’ pet peeves about hypocrisy and stupidity in social media and news, tangents about relationship roles (“trad wife”), and comically honest stories about the idiocy of everyday life—especially on the road. With trademark unseriousness, Bryan and Krissy riff on politics, influencer culture, reality TV, and why sometimes it’s best to just let that guy pass you on the highway. If you’re here for structure, keep moving: this is classic TCB chaos with unfiltered banter, a couple of R-rated recollections, and rants that are both genuinely funny and sneakily thought-provoking.
Key Discussion Points
1. Social Media Hypocrisy & Influencers
- Bryan’s Rant: Bryan rails against hypocrites on social media, particularly those who disparage “influencers” while behaving the exact same way.
- “The truth is, is that I hate the fucking hypocrisy. That’s what drives me goddamn crazy.” – Bryan (02:45)
- Not Naming Names: Both hosts highlight that Bryan won’t call out individuals publicly, preferring to lampoon the “type” rather than specific people.
- Owning Your Flaws: Embracing imperfection, Bryan presents himself as "warts and all" and calls out the performative perfectionism in online spaces.
- “I am who I am. Ugly spots and all, warts and all. I’m not perfect. I’m not the perfect human being… But I admit it. I know it and I love myself for it.” – Bryan (03:22)
2. The State of News and Broadcast Dumbness
- Mocking News Anchors: Bryan mercilessly parodies a hapless news anchor and their dumb questions, revealing how low the standard is for televised political discussion.
- “Do we think that warmer temperatures have something to do with this hurricane? No, we don’t. Get off the air. Move along now.” – Bryan (05:50)
- Hate-Watching as a Hobby: Both hosts admit they hate-watch cable news just to gawk at the stupidity, self-aware of the irony.
- “One of the faults of Bryan Green. I wish I could shake, but I can't shake it.” (08:52)
3. Internet Trolls, Comedy Podcasts & Sexism
- Podcast Roast Shows: The hosts discuss discovering a podcast whose sole purpose is to trash other podcasts and guests. Bryan is bemused and Krissy bemoans the ever-present haters, especially towards female comedians.
- “It seems like any time that we have a female comic on here, it’s really weird… always some jackhole that's got to make a comment about how she's not funny.” – Bryan (13:30)
- “We're in the last throes of super machismo.” – Bryan (16:06)
- Gender Roles vs. Communication: The duo discuss relationship roles, modern vs. traditional (“trad wife”) dynamics, with levity and a “do what works for you” attitude.
4. Relationship Roles & 'Trad Wife' Culture
- Mutual Roles: There’s a back-and-forth on why Bryan and Krissy’s relationships work: roles are based on preference, not expectation.
- “There are roles… but I think it's because we've communicated that that's what we want to do.” – Bryan (20:18)
- Trad Wife Trend: Krissy admits to spiraling down Instagram ‘trad wife’ pages with anthropological wonder, while Bryan sees it as “fetishized.” Both agree everyone should do what suits them as long as it’s their choice.
5. Absurdly Honest Anecdotes
- Childhood Sexual Curiosity: In classic TCB overshare, Bryan hilariously recounts the adolescent urge to hump everything, relating it to public news about J.D. Vance and “the couch incident.”
- “At 13 years old and you’re a boy, you’re pretty much sticking your dick in anything…” – Bryan (21:38)
- “I got a tickle in my pickle. I got a wing wang in my bing bang daddy.” – Bryan (23:26)
- DIY Failures: Bryan’s tale of “fixing” the dishwasher is a comedic highlight.
- “I was down there for seven minutes twisting that thing forever before I realized… you had to hold the lug nut!” (15:11)
6. Pop Culture & TV Recommendations
- Instagram Oddities: They trade stories about following eccentric creators, like “Florida Woman,” and how going political can kill an account’s appeal.
- TV Hot Takes: The hosts discuss their current viewing:
- Tokyo Vice: Highly recommended as “so fucking good,” though maybe a bit slow at times. (32:07)
- Brassic: “It’s like an adult British Goonies if the Goonies grew up to be thieves.” – Bryan (36:09)
- Presumed Innocent, Love is Blind, 90 Day Fiance, House Hunters International: All cameo with varied enthusiasm.
- “I thought Brassic was like an adult British version of the Goonies. But imagine the Goonies were thieves.” – Bryan (36:36)
- “Love off the Grid” and other reality TV are dissected, with TCB’s usual blend of judgment and fandom.
7. Bryan’s ‘Epiphany’: Road Rage Isn’t Worth It
- The Existential Moment: A family road trip and an escalating “race” with a stranger leads Bryan to a realization about the futility (and danger) of competitive driving.
- “I am the dumb, dumb, dumb who knows this intellectually, but cannot emotionally control himself enough not to play stupid fucking games… with sleeping children in the car.” – Bryan (53:35)
- “Do I really think for one minute that when I pass somebody like that… they’re going home… with tears in their eyes and going, he got me?” – Bryan (52:52)
- From Rage to Reflection: A near-collision and an accident scene hammer home the message: winning on the road is meaningless compared to keeping your family safe.
- “My dick’s not going to be any bigger no matter how fast I go. It’s just not.” – Bryan (58:35)
- Krissy’s Proud: “I am so proud of you.” – Krissy (58:56)
- Practical Takeaway: Both agree: Slow down, let others pass, and value what (and who) matters.
8. Recurring TCB Themes & Community
- Meta Jokes: The hosts embrace being "just FINE" and the butt of podcast jokes.
- “I’m sure a lot of podcasters look at us and go, at least I’m not The Commercial Break.” – Bryan (10:32)
- Show Meta: Christina pops in for show news and self-aware, comedic promo spots, cementing the in-joke “pretty, pretty princess” character. (45:29)
- Audience Engagement: Heavy reminders about their upcoming live shows and ways to connect.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|---------|-------| | 02:45 | Bryan | “The truth is, is that I hate the fucking hypocrisy. That’s what drives me goddamn crazy.” | | 03:22 | Bryan | “I am who I am. Ugly spots and all, warts and all… But I admit it… and I love myself for it.” | | 05:50 | Bryan | “Do we think that warmer temperatures have something to do with this hurricane? No, we don’t. Get off the air. Move along now.” | | 13:30 | Bryan | “It seems like any time that we have a female comic on here, it’s really weird… always some jackhole that's got to make a comment about how she's not funny.” | | 16:06 | Bryan | "We're in the last throes of super machismo." | | 21:38 | Bryan | “At 13 years old and you’re a boy, you’re pretty much sticking your dick in anything…”| | 23:26 | Bryan | “I got a tickle in my pickle. I got a wing wang in my bing bang daddy.” | | 36:09 | Bryan | “I thought Brassic was like an adult British version of the Goonies. But imagine the Goonies were thieves.” | | 53:35 | Bryan | “I am the dumb, dumb, dumb who knows this intellectually, but cannot emotionally control himself enough not to play stupid fucking games… with sleeping children in the car.” | | 58:35 | Bryan | “My dick’s not going to be any bigger no matter how fast I go. It’s just not.” | | 58:56 | Krissy | “I am so proud of you.” |
Important Timestamps
- Intro & Hypocrisy Rant: 00:00 – 04:00
- News Anchor Parody/Dumb Questions: 04:02 – 09:00
- Podcast Haters / Sexism / Female Comics: 10:21 – 16:06
- Trad Wife & Gender Roles: 17:37 – 21:14
- Hilarious TCB Overshares (Sex, DIY, etc): 21:14 – 25:00
- Social Media Follows, TV Talk (Tokyo Vice, Brassic): 25:51 – 41:00
- Reality TV, Content Recommendations: 41:06 – 44:11
- Bryan’s Driving Epiphany: 46:22 – 59:30
- Emotional Wrap, Key Life Lesson: 59:30 – End
Tone and Takeaway
Expect irreverence, overshare, meta-commentary, and genuine self-critique. The vibe is loose, occasionally explicit, and always laced with the sense that life’s absurdities are best handled with a joke, a confession, and giving yourself—and others—a break.
Final wisdom?
It’s all chaos, so slow down and let someone else win the race for once. Nobody cares, and your family will thank you.
Contact & Upcoming Shows:
- Live in Dania Beach, FL (9/24) & Orlando (9/25), 2024
- Instagram: @thecommercialbreak
- TikTok: @TCBpodcast
- Website: tcbpodcast.com
- Text/Voicemail: 212-433-3822
Best To You Out There In The Podcast Universe!