Take 'Em To The Liars Den!

Summary

The Commercial Break - Episode Summary

Podcast: The Commercial Break
Episode: Take 'Em To The Liars Den!
Date: January 18, 2024
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy (Kristen Joy Hoadley)
Theme: A laugh-out-loud dissection of modern pick-up artistry, life’s logistical headaches, and the absurdity of self-appointed internet experts (with a heavy dose of chaotic banter).

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Episode Overview

This episode blends Bryan and Krissy’s signature irreverent humor with a detailed (and relentless) roast of “Adam the Liar” (aka Adam Lyons), a well-known “pickup artist” speaking at the notorious 21 Convention. The hosts analyze, deconstruct, and lampoon Adam’s “techniques” for romantic logistics and “closing,” while weaving in their own parenting stories, pop culture quips, cryptocurrency jokes, and satirical asides about life’s daily hurdles.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Money Woes, Queef Coin, and Streaming Fatigue

• The show opens with tongue-in-cheek complaints about American Express, inventive cryptocurrency (notably, “queef coin”), and the endless maze of streaming services.
• Bryan riffs: “Do you take queef coin? Because I am rich in queef coin. I’ve got 3 million queef coin in my fart wallet. The safest place to put it.” (03:44)

2. Parenting Follies & Life’s Logistical Mayhem

• Bryan shares the chaos of a recent kids’ birthday, featuring an elaborate piñata and sugar-fueled rugrats almost causing a real-life Lord of the Flies.
• The hassles of digital streaming subscriptions and trying to explain platform equivalence to children (“Amazon Sing” vs “Netflix Sing”) fuels another round of comic frustration.
• Memorable line: “I feel like when I’m in a rugby game, and I’m like, whoa, whoa, whoa. I’m picking kids up by the scruff of their neck…” (14:37)

3. Dog Drama: Blue the Barky Dog

• Extended venting about Blue, Bryan’s neurotic, bark-happy dog and the resulting “Chinese water torture” sensation.
• Bryan on Blue: “It’s like I’ve got a hold of a bad colon problem where I just fart all the time. You know, I feel like I’ve got this dog. That’s how you came up with queefcoin.” (18:53-19:00)

4. Pick-Up Artist Nonsense: Adam the Liar at the 21 Convention

• Main focus: Recapping and mercilessly roasting “Adam the Liar’s” lecture at the 21 Convention, a PUA (pick-up artist) event for men seeking “dating mastery.”
• Adam’s advice centers obsessively on logistics: setting the mood, prepping the home, and ensuring music playlists, condoms, and even motorcycle helmets are ready—instead of fostering genuine connection.
• Bryan and Krissy ridicule Adam and his equally absurd comrades (“Spear,” “Sin,” etc.), drawing parallels to children playing make-believe or off-brand Marvel villains.
• Krissy’s take: “Are these—they’re like PUA names?”
  Bryan: “Of course they are… It’s like they’re like sixth graders, honestly.” (31:06-31:16)

Memorable Interludes:

• The logistics “advice” grows increasingly absurd: candles in the car, “condom on a string,” and prepping so much that “it takes me four days to prep my house.” (39:14)
• Bryan on Adam’s prep: “Pants down, condom on… I have my condom set up in a little loop. I run in the door, drop my trowel, run into the condom, fully hard, ready to go… Ferris Bueller before when he set up the room.” (39:13-39:57)

5. Broader Satire of PUA World

• The hosts emphasize how Adam’s advice doesn’t address actual social skills and is disconnected from reality.
• “If anybody in the audience is believing that this actually works, you’re a God. I don’t know a single woman… who are way smarter than this. They are not looking to sleep with you based on the lighting in your apartment.” (43:37-43:53)

6. Adam’s Gender Roles & “Cleaning Lady” Expectations

• Adam brags about his female friends compulsively cleaning for him when they visit—prompting outrage from the hosts:
  • Bryan: “You even take advantage of your friends and their kindness. That’s how you roll… You invite them over before you go out so that they’ll get irritated by your messiness and clean up. You take advantage of their OCD.” (49:18-49:23)
  • Krissy: “Who raised you, Adam? And how proud she must be.” (51:29-51:34)

7. PUA Party Stories—Believability at an All-Time Low

• Adam tells an improbable tale of his friend trying to orchestrate a party-threesome in the same hotel room while Adam sleeps. Bryan and Krissy highlight the story’s utter lack of sense.
• Adam’s “lesson”: logistics are the real barrier to getting laid, not social skills or personality.

8. Final Roast, Conclusions & Audience Takeaway

• The hosts conclude that Adam is a terrible source of romantic counsel and that logistics are irrelevant if you have no real connection—“Do the opposite of what Adam’s telling you to do.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments (With Timestamps)

Queef Coin & Fart Wallet:

• “Do you take queef coin? Because I am rich in queef coin. I’ve got 3 million queef coin in my fart wallet.” — Bryan (03:44)

Parenting Chaos:

• “I feel like when I’m in a rugby game, and I’m picking kids up by the scruff of their neck…” — Bryan (14:37)

On Blue the Dog:

• “That’s how you came up with QueefCoin.”
  “Queef coin, my friend, is gonna take off. If dogecoin got to a dollar, queefcoin is gonna get to two.” — Bryan (18:53-19:00)

PUA Names and Community:

• “They’re like sixth graders, honestly.” — Bryan (31:12)
• “You gotta go out and find Sin or Spear or Cheetos or Tire Iron…” — (33:05)

Absurd Home Prep:

• “It takes me four days to prep my house… Ferris Bueller before when he set up the room. I’ve got a string attached to a mannequin. I open the door, the mannequin falls over, the condom comes on, lube applied, Airwick goes off. Fresh scent. Maybe queef coin ready to go. Done and dusted.” — Co-host/Bryan (39:14-39:57)

On Adam’s 'Skill':

• “If anybody in the audience is believing that this actually works, you’re a God. I don’t know a single woman, and I know a lot of them… who are way smarter than this.” — Bryan (43:37)

Adam’s Housekeeping Gender Dynamics:

• “You even take advantage of your friends and their kindness. That’s how you roll.” — Bryan (49:18)

Why Listen to Adam?

• “I don’t know how, why, when, where anybody would take advice from this guy. But here’s my advice. Don’t take advice from this guy. He’s wrong about all of it.” — Bryan (62:36)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• [00:00–03:15] Opening riffs: hoe in spirit, queef coin, AMEX harassment
• [03:15–08:54] Streaming app complaints, parenting, "Amazon Sing" vs. "Netflix Sing"
• [08:54–16:41] Parenting, birthday party chaos, kids + sugar; Blue the dog saga
• [16:41–21:01] Dog talk wraps, queef coin/dogecoin riff, NFT bubble satire
• [23:22–26:51] Introduction to Adam the Liar and the 21 Convention
• [28:03–38:01] Adam’s “closing” advice; PUA community names; prepping pickups
• [39:13–43:29] Ridicule of PUA logistics, absurd home prep (lighting, condoms, music)
• [49:01–52:18] Gender roles, Adam’s female friends cleaning for him
• [54:56–62:36] Adam’s “threesome party” tale, why logistics supposedly matter most, final roast and show wrap

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Conclusion

“Take ‘Em To The Liars Den!” serves as a hilarious, biting takedown of self-styled “pickup artists” while offering listeners a candid, comedic view into Bryan and Krissy’s everyday mishaps. The episode is a fast-moving, infectious reminder that authenticity trumps canned “game,” and if you need queef coin advice—look elsewhere.

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For fans of improv, anti-guru humor, pop culture chaos, and the “Cheesecake Factory of comedy podcasts.”

Transcript

[Brian Green]

I may not be a practicing hoe.

[Adam the Liar]

But I'm a hoe in spirit.

[Brian Green]

On this episode of the commercial break, the guy said, I live two and a half hours away from the bar. You know what I would say?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Did you set up your music?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Did you set up your music? You set up your music. You need to get some candles, put.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Them in your car, light them up, get the music playing, keep the engine running, have a condom tied to two little strings. When you open the door, you slide right into it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Pants down, condom on.

[Brian Green]

The next episode of the commercial break starts now.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the CEO of cash Management, Kristen Joy Hoadley.

[Brian Green]

Best to you, Chrissy.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Best to you, Brian.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

[Brian Green]

You're doing a terrible job, by the way. Terrible job. Me? You're fired. Cash Management.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Just slips right out of my fingers.

[Brian Green]

It does, does. It's just a wild west of podcasting. Just always chasing it, never getting it. There you go. How's it going?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

How's it going, everybody?

[Brian Green]

Welcome back to this. Very well. I'll move on from that. I don't want to complain the whole episode. You know, you wake up in a mood sometimes.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah, I'm in a mood.

[Adam the Liar]

I'm in a mood.

[Brian Green]

I don't know why I'm in a mood. I'm just in a mood.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, let's be positive.

[Brian Green]

Probably has something to do with AMEX calling me every 15 minutes. Mr. Green, Mr. Green, you're 45 days late on your payment. Would you like to make a payment now? Well, you can press that button all you want. Pretty sure you're going to get the same answer from the bank.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Do you take. Do you take.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Do you take Visa?

[Brian Green]

Do.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Do you take queef coin?

[Brian Green]

Do you take queef coin? Because I am rich in queef coin. I've got 3 million queef coin in my. In my fart wallet. The safest place to put it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It is.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Let me talk to your manager over there.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You guys need to get on this leaf cloth.

[Brian Green]

Yes, this is Mr. Amex, manager. How can I. How can I. You know what the problem is? My kids keep playing with my damn thing. Hello. There we go. Hello. This is the manager of American Express. How may I help you? Mr. Green? Yeah, listen, I know I'm just a couple days late on that payment, but what I'd like to do is I'd like to offer you a limited opportunity to partner with my brand new nft Slash coin. Altcoin called queefcoin. I'm sorry, did you say queef coin? I did. Don't be alarmed by the name. This is all the rage. Essentially what you do is you take a real life queef and you put it into your Internet box and it comes out and it makes queef coin. I'm sorry, sir, if we just take a check, you're missing out on an opportunity. What if you pay me a thousand dollars to talk about queef coin? How would you like unlimited inventory on the commercial break? Yes, we've heard about the commercial break. I'm telling you what, we're going to pass for now, but call us back in a couple years when you start getting paid on that show.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You don't take queefcoin.

[Brian Green]

I said no to the kriefcoin. Okay, well, I'll call you back when I get some money. We would appreciate it. Thank you. Queef coin. Almost as valuable as dogecoin.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Dogecoin.

[Brian Green]

I looked at it. Chrissy and I were talking before the thing, and I'm like, I wonder what that dogecoin is at. I go, oh, it's at 81 cents. Wow. It really did. Well, what I missed was the point.081 cents. It's actually 8 cents is what it's at. But bitcoin is doing well because a couple of days ago or a week ago, however long it is, I don't. The time gets lost in this podcast.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I know. It really does.

[Brian Green]

It really does. We don't have like a normal 9 to 5 schedule.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I don't even think. Even though it seems like we work all the time, but whenever it was the sec, the Security Exchange Commission sent off a tweet. And the tweet said that they were going to approve regulations around some fund that had bitcoin attached to it. Right. Hedge fund around bitcoin, I think, is basically the premise of it. And then they immediately had to put out a press release saying that they, in fact did not do that. A hacker had done it. They had not put on to two factor authentication on their Twitter. So a hacker had gone in and made that announcement. They had no announcement to make around Bitcoin.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Then the very next day, they send.

[Brian Green]

Out the exact same tweet and said, this one's real.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It's like.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Are you sure? Are you sure?

[Brian Green]

Really? Now get. Now gear.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

This one's real.

[Brian Green]

This one's real. And so the price of bitcoin apparently is. Is rising again. Surging. Because now finally there's some they think there's some legitimacy. I do think that altcoin has its place somewhere. Decentralized banking has its place somewhere. Still don't believe in those NFTs? Still not buying into that? No, no. My new NFT collection, Queef by Brian.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Bye.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Bye, Brian.

[Brian Green]

It's gonna be like those. What are those tests that they give you? The warshack tests. It's just gonna be a bunch of warshack tests. Ever taking a warshack test?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The ones with like, the ink and the stuff?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, the blotted ink and stuff like that. You know, I've taken a couple of those for various reasons. Right.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Mainly my stability recommended.

[Brian Green]

And I always get really nervous that I'm going to say the wrong thing. It's really hard to say the first thing that comes to your mind.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I don't think there is a right or wrong. Isn't that right?

[Brian Green]

Well, if you say, like, you know, dog with his head chopped off. Now we're going to get a violent tag on YouTube.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Nothing's new there.

[Brian Green]

Nothing new there. They say, like a dog with its head chopped off. Clearly there's a problem.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's what I'm saying. I think it just provides insight into your brain.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. So I just say love to all of them. Love. Love.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

One love, Mom.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

One love.

[Brian Green]

Did we. Did you see the Bob Marley movie?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

You did?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

From years ago.

[Brian Green]

No, the. The new one. The new biography. The new movie that they put out. I. I've only seen the commercials a couple of times on tv, very sparsely. Right. Maybe like two times on tv. Don't know. That's a great question. Where is it? Because you would think that a movie about Bob Marley, like a biography, would do really well with a certain subset of human beings, that being most of us.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right. There's Bob Marley.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, he's Bob Marley.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, he. Well, there was one I know, when Jeff and I were first dating. So that would have been about 12 years ago that had just come out.

[Sponsor Voice]

And we went, oh, that was the documentary.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That was really.

[Brian Green]

I saw that. That was really good. Yeah, you're right. Barb Marley movie.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Barb, this guy's in conjunction. Because I'm gonna be going to Jamaica, mom.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah. Oh, February 14th, Valentine's Day is. Comes out.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, cool.

[Brian Green]

And it's called One Love. You're gonna.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Where is it playing?

[Brian Green]

At the movie theater, I guess.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, at the theater.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Not on the 1 billion streaming surfaces that I have a subscription to.

[Brian Green]

I'm sure it will go there eventually. Yeah, of course, you know We. We. Like, I had to get rid of a few of the streaming services, and now the kids, the only thing that they want to watch are the things that I got rid of. And I'm like, hey, listen, we. You really don't need another streaming service. You've got everything you need. With the 12 we already have. Do you need the extra six? Do we need, like, you know, I don't know what or whatever the it's called now. Like, do we really need that? And my son and one of my kids is just like, he's desperate to get on this one app that I canceled because I don't need to pay 25.95amonth, every month for another app which has the same movies. And then there's this other problem where the kids think the movie is different on each app. So you can get, like, the movie. Sing. Sing is a movie for kids, right? And they get.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It's a really cute movie.

[Brian Green]

It's a lovely movie. It's actually entertaining. I like this.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And the songs are good and all that other stuff. So you can get Sing on multiple different platforms, which you have to pay for it if it's anything, but I think Netflix or whatever. So my kids are desperate to get Sing on Amazon and DirecTV. And I'm like, guys, you have this movie already. Why would you need. No, it's not the same movie. It is the same movie. No, it's not. It's Amazon Prime. Sing, not Netflix. Sing. And I'm like, guys, it's not different. It's no different. It's hard to explain to these kids. I wish I could just speak their language. You know, they say, like, get down on their level and, you know, talk to them in, like, adults, adult language, but use words that they understand. Yeah, I'm down there trying to do calculus with my kid. Like, see, if you move over to Amazon and then you. Minus your bank account by 25.99, you take Netflix and you add 5.99 plus commercials that you have to watch, and then you move over here to HBO Max, where the same movie is playing, but for 22.95. Unless you have Verizon. And if you have Verizon, you get a free for six months that equals daddy's not spending any more money on singing.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I have you on my own a couple accounts.

[Brian Green]

You do? Yeah. And I, you know, I share all of my accounts with people. But now Netflix, of course, is. Is taking a stab at trying to reduce that. And I've actually, I think I'm a part of that because I've actually been kicked off of Netflix a couple of times, and I believe it's because people in Venezuela are watching my Netflix account. I probably shouldn't say that here on air, they're going to target me. Like anybody from Netflix is watching Netflix. If you're watching, I have a great television show idea for you. It's called the commercial break. So back to the Rorschach test. You take those Rorschach tests, and I just get nervous that they're gonna. They think that I'm weird if I tell them what I really think about that. Have you ever taken a Rorschach test for any reason?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, I mean, just kind of for fun.

[Brian Green]

Let's see here. Okay, ready? Here we go.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Are you gonna show me?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I'm gonna show you. I'm going to show you. Ready? What do you think of when you see that first word that comes to mind?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Like a wolf.

[Brian Green]

A wolf?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Okay, you're fucked. All right, now what do you. Now I want you to look at this one and tell me what you think you see. A bat. A bat. Okay. Yep. It's getting darker and darker. Things are. Things are looking problematic for Chrissy. All right, now I want you to.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Look at my animalistic.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Self.

[Brian Green]

What do you see when you see that one?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, yeah, that's like two hands.

[Brian Green]

Oh, two hands meeting together.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

See, I see an X ray of a penis in a uterus.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

That's what I see.

[Brian Green]

I'm not even kidding.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

So that's why I get afraid to.

[Brian Green]

Say the real answer. So then I just make stuff up like, you know, butterfly.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Puppy dog, rainbows, hearts.

[Brian Green]

And of course, the psychiatrist knows I'm lying. Yeah, that's probably more problematic for him. He's like dark thoughts, murderer. We had one of my kids birthdays over the weekend.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes, you did.

[Brian Green]

One of my children had a birthday. She's very young, and so it's a birthday that doesn't count in her mind because she'll never remember it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right.

[Brian Green]

It's only for the edification of the parents. So we allow the kids to invite some of their friends so that they're not bored. And then we rented this like little play place area, you know, like a little tiny play place where the kid slides and stuff like that so the kids could have fun. And Astor does the pinata.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

God, she's so good at those. I just was talking to her about her helping me make one for the boys.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah, you should have my nephews yeah, yeah.

[Brian Green]

I don't know how she does it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

But she was trying to tell me. Yeah, it's amazing.

[Brian Green]

It's amazing. It's actually a lot of work as I've watched her now construct. You know, I don't. Let me do the math. Quick in my head, 37 of them. She does it for my birthday party too. Oh. So we have this pinata and then we're in this like little party room where they have tables and food and stuff. And my father in law, who I. But I. And he finds a way to string the pinata up on the room. I mean, he's like banging stuff into the wall and he's got this pulley system going on and there's six ropes and one person holds this and the other one shakes that one and he pulls it back and forth. So it kind of moves up and down when the kids are trying to hit it, you know, gives them a little game to play. And he is the one who's having the most fun with this, by the way. My father in law has the most fun with the pinatas. He just loves it. He thinks it's so entertaining to watch the kids and try and get them to miss it. Yeah, right. Well, here's the problem. You got a bat like structure in one of these children's hands. They're ages 3 to 7 or 9. You know, they're like young kids and they swing so wildly because they have no idea how to swing. And all the other kids are in a circle. So we have to keep backing them up and backing them up. They want to inch in so they can get in on the action when it happens. Right. Well, some of these kids, I don't even think they've ever picked up a bat in their life. And understandably, they're probably too young, right? So they. So I got. Sometimes I got to help the kid, you know, go up there and grab their hand and help them hit it. But then some of these kids are just like, I don't know, it's like Motley Crue in a Hotel in 1984. They're just swinging wildly around the room. And I swear, Chrissy, I. I was really worried that I didn't have the kind of insurance I needed to cover this kind of activity because these kids were going at. Some of these kids were going at it and they were coming inches from the other kids heads. And I kept telling the kids I'd sound like a total asshole because I'm like, back up, back up, back up. And all the Parents are like, geez, settle down, dude. And I'm. You, settle down, because you're going to sue me if one of your kids ends up with a eyeball sticking out of his head.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

So then there's, like, one kid who is a little bit bigger and a little bit older than all of them. He is also much more aggressive, I guess is the word to say. Like, he's not afraid to get at it, you know?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

All the other kids are just like, little kid, you know, they're just kids and they're, you know, they're kind of hitting it with a little daft touch. And some kids are swinging wildly, but they're not swinging aggressively at it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right? Yeah.

[Brian Green]

This kid comes up. Oh, my God. Yes.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

He's like Bruce Lee. I mean, he's like. And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And he's screaming at it.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Somebody give.

[Brian Green]

That kid a Rorschach test.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I know. He was taking out his frustrations.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. And then he. And then he finally busted it open. I knew he would.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He was the one that did it.

[Brian Green]

He busted it open. So then Astrid's like. Astrid says, okay, now, Brian, spread it out. Don't let one kick in everything. Spread it out. Spread it out. Right. All the kids are in a thing. And I don't really understand what she's telling me. And I'm like, yeah, I'll spread it out on the floor. Let me. I'll open it up and it'll spread out on the floor. These kids are. It's like.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Like jumping.

[Brian Green]

Yes. They're playing for the national championship. I mean, grabbing each other's faces, hands and mouths. Kids kicking kids. Diapers coming off every. It's like a scrum. I feel like when I'm in a.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Rugby game, and I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Brian Green]

I'm picking kids up by the scruff. Their neck just like, we'll give you some. Settle down. It's crazy.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, yeah. When candy's involved, all bets are off.

[Brian Green]

Kids, once they get that taste of sugar, it is all over. It's game over. That's all they want. So we take our. So this whole thing happens and all that. We make sure that all the kids get the appropriate amount of candy. And then Astrid, smart girl, smart, human as she is, decides to do no candy for the gift basket. Gift bag. She just hands this gift bag. It's got some toys in it. It's got some art things you can do in it. And she hands him. And we go away. We get back Home. And the baby, the one who had the. The birthday.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

It's a tradition around the house that you get your first sugar when you turn 1 years old. That's when you get your first sugar. A little taste, you get a cupcake. Right. Or a piece of cake. You're a little tasty teener indeed. You should have seen it. We put the cupcake in front of her. Everybody's videotaping. It's a big crowd. And she's like, she sticks, she's very cautious. So she sticks her finger in there. She's like trying to figure out how to grab it. She's putting her hands around it but not touching it. Right. She's like, yeah. Going like this, afraid it's gonna explode or something. Right. She throws her hands back.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Finally she puts a finger in there and she's like, chrissy, it didn't take 15 seconds before this cupcake was directly in her face. She was like, we always.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That was a tradition in our house too, to let the kids just go, go at a cake.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You know, just dig their hands in.

[Brian Green]

It's so much fun. We have pictures like, of all the kids doing this and it's so much fun. But this one got wound up like a top. We put her down on the floor, she started crawling in circles. I'm not kidding you. She was just like going in circles. Round and round and round. Sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar. And of course Blue is over there just licking her face. Goddamn dog. Get away from her. Can't we leave it alone for a second? Come on, Blue.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Can we have one nice thing in this house, Blue, please? For the love of all the tolly.

[Brian Green]

Blue. Oh, I don't know what to do with her anymore. I really don't.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, you just, you're. You just have to accept things well.

[Brian Green]

So I know I do. I say let go and let God. Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Four years.

[Brian Green]

Four years.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And it's the same thing every time.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Blue, shut up.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Stop it.

[Brian Green]

Stop it. My mother in law told me I need to take a deep breath. And I'm like, you, do you know what? You know what Chinese water torture is? This is what this feels like. And I had to explain what water torture was. You know the drip, drip on your forehead. Right. So I had to explain that after some, I think the first four years of her life, I just accepted it as a part of having a dog. Then the next two, I started to grow more agitated and irritated. And now I think I'm in full blown sensory overload. Because anytime she starts Barking for no reason. I just go apeshit. I'm like, blue, shut up. But I. I say that to her, and then she barks at me.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

It doesn't do anything. And I'm not gonna hit the dog. Of course I wouldn't do that. Right. And I'm never gonna give her away because she's my dog and I love her. At some level, I love her. No.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

When she comes into the studio, she's so cute. She comes in and she just lays down.

[Brian Green]

She does.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And just Is so sweet.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, she's so sweet. And then second, it's.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It's to do with the door.

[Brian Green]

I think it's to do with her anxiety around me. If I'm not. If I'm being really honest. I think it's her anxiety around me. I think she has ident. She identified early that she imprinted. Imprinted on me. And anytime I'm, like, doing something, she gets anxious. Right? And she wants to know what's going on. She wants to be right at my feet, and she barks at me because she wants to alert me that she's not comfortable with the situation. But that could be just walking to the kitchen. It's like, I do this every day. It's okay. So sometimes I'm just trying to go get a bite to eat, and she's just barking incessantly me. And I'm like, jesus Jones, Blue, do you settle down for just two fucking seconds? Could we not have this? Can we not? But you're right. If I'm sitting here quietly doing my work, she'll sit at my feet, she'll lay on my feet. She won't do a damn thing. It's not until I get up, start walking or talking to somebody that she starts barking. So it's like I've got. I don't know. It's like I've got a hold of a bad colon problem where I just fart all the time. You know, I feel. I feel like I'm. I've got this dog.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's how you came up with queefcoin.

[Brian Green]

Queef coin, my friend, is gonna take off. If dogecoin got to a dollar, grief coin is gonna get to two.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Dogecoin's not at a dollar.

[Brian Green]

Well, it was at a dollar, I don't think. Actually. I never think it made it through a dollar. I think it was, like, $0.56 when, like, Mark Cuban and all those people were talking. Wasn't everybody in on dogecoin? For a second?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It seemed like it's some kind of coin.

[Brian Green]

I think it was a joke that kind of took on a. It was a joke that then became like a pyramid scheme that everybody got involved in. Let me buy a million dogecoin. It'll move the market. Then I can sell it at the top, and then everybody down below loses. And that's how these things go, because it's an investment. And not that, but I wish I could sell Blue. How do you put her on the market?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Maybe Blue could be the one NFT that makes money.

[Brian Green]

You know what? That's actually not a bad idea. So what do I do? Put her in the printer? Yeah, I just put her in the printer and sucker up as a JPEG. It seems like that's what some of these NFTs do. They're literally just like, you know, pictures that you put into a printer and then someone buys it for a million dollars. At least that was the promise of nft.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That was what was happening for a good little while. Like a year, Was it about a year.

[Brian Green]

I feel like all of 2020 and most of 2021 just was dedicated to NFTs. Every Twitter space, every clubhouse room, everything was dedicated to nft.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Cheers to anybody that actually made money.

[Brian Green]

I think there were a lot of people that made money. I think there were a lot of people made money. And then I think there were a lot of people who had money. Like they had NFTs that were worth maybe millions of dollars.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right. And now they're not.

[Brian Green]

Now they're not. That's right. The Internet is soiled, littered with people who lost their shirts on NFTs. And I. I really do, because had I had any money, I might have gotten into NFTs myself.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

But lucky for me, I don't have.

[Brian Green]

Any money, so I can't buy any NFTs. You can't lose what you don't have. That's just a reality. Am I right or am I right?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You're right. Right, right, right, right, right, right, right.

[Brian Green]

Right, right, right, right. Okay, let's take a break and we'll be back. Ugh.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Finally.

[Promo/Announcements Voice]

I feel like I was waiting forever for my turn to talk. Now that I have you to find all of our audio and video content and follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTokCBpodcast. Want it to be your turn to talk? Call us and spill the tea at 626askTCB3 and you may hear your voice on the show. You can also text us your tea at 855-TCB8383. And boy, do we love to hear it. Anyway, take a listen to our sponsors and let's get back to the show.

[Sponsor Voice]

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[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

All right, we're back.

[Brian Green]

Last episode, Chrissy and I, we're going through all of our favorites here on on the first couple weeks of the season number. We're going through some of our old favorites, some of the people we've been rusing on for a long time. And one of our favorites here is the pua, the pickup artist known as Adam the liar here at the commercial break. I think his real name is Adam Lyons.

[Promo/Announcements Voice]

It is.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

We dubbed him the liar.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

We dubbed him the liar Adam the.

[Brian Green]

Liar lions because some of the stuff he says is just way too outrageous to believe. I mean, honestly, if you thought some of my stories were unbelievable, you should hear some of this guy's stories. And you will because we're reviewing him at the 21 convention. The 21 convention is a place where men don't have to stand alone in the war against men.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

We looked it up.

[Brian Green]

Defeat your enemy by poking them in the vagina with your penis. I guess is how it goes.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I'm not sure.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, they have an app and everything.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, they have an app and everything. I don't think they do the convention anymore. Probably standing room only. It got so popular they couldn't have a place to fit it. But I love on the website how they have these, like, fake reviews. It's like four stars, you know, this guy is professional. Professional. What? I'm a professional.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The one was just. I loved it.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah, I loved it.

[Brian Green]

Oh, great. Wow. Who said that? They don't even have a name. It just says I loved it in quotations. Were four stars. I loved it. I loved it. Didn't learn anything, but it was a lot of fun to hang out with other guys in the war against women. Yeah, whatever it is. So last time we left off, Adam was telling us about the other puas who are going to be here at the 21 convention. He's giving a speech. It's like two hours long. We're obviously not going to go through all two hours, but I didn't want to leave you hanging because we just got through a little bit of it last time. So I thought we would go through some more of it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Today, here on this episode. Well, he.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He dropped a bomb that, you know, some of the other people out there cannot close. Can't close.

[Brian Green]

They can open a set.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

They can game.

[Brian Green]

You got to understand some of the verbiage too here. They could game. That's right. You got to understand some of the verbiage. If this is the first time. Listening to the commercial break, PUA is a pickup artist. Opening a set means you are hitting on a girl. It's like a cold open. Like you're walking like a cold sail, baby. Yeah. What was it? What?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The fish. Something fish.

[Brian Green]

Who lays longer. Who has a bigger dick, a fish or a chicken? I don't know what it is something about that. But Adam is explaining that the number one problem he's realized about the community of men who take advice from PUAs.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Is that people are taking advice from puas.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I think you missed.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's the problem. I see.

[Brian Green]

Me too. But the number one problem he's identified, the number two problem he's identified is that they cannot close, Meaning they cannot get in bed with a woman. Well, no shit, Sherlock. You think someone would pay $5,000 to show up to your shitty conference in Orlando. If they, in fact, had a gaggle full of ass around them, if their Tip was wet 24 hours a day, you think they'd be showing up here? No, they'd have too much time on their hands. Hands with women.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right.

[Brian Green]

That's why they're here. So automatically this guy is like a preacher, right? He's coming in and he's telling you what all the problems you obviously have are. I love when a preacher comes out and he says, you're broke.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Pray to Jesus. Well, everybody's broke.

[Brian Green]

You.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You have health problems.

[Brian Green]

Pray to Jesus.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Well, no.

[Brian Green]

I mean, it's just so obvious. But he's identifying with them. He's emotionally pulling them in by saying, I. I know what your problem is.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Is.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And he's also was. He was also posturing about how shitty everybody else is. But he just goes into this long story about, oh, my God, picking up a girl and she was down to lay that night or what?

[Brian Green]

Snl. Same night.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Night.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Lay snl.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And then he was having sex and his flatmate's bed. And then. Anyways, we're not going to get into it.

[Brian Green]

It was absolutely disgusting. Squirting and blood and all this other stuff. You don't even want to know about it. It's like the most dis. Opening story to tell in a speech.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

But he's like.

[Brian Green]

That'S where the real problems come in. He was explaining that the real challenges. That somebody had emailed him and said, it's such a challenge when I'm doing an opening set. And he said, no, the real challenges come when you're closing because then they.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Squirt all over you.

[Brian Green]

There's hazards, there's cleaning bills involved. He's such a dick. He's such a dick. Okay, so without further ado, trolling on the Internet, as you do, as I do like to do, let's get back in into Adam here at the 21 convention. He's going to talk about the next puas. The other puas that are at the conference gonna help these guys out.

[Adam the Liar]

Three people that I know don't have a problem with closing. And they're people that live in your area, so they're people that you definitely want to meet and hang out with. You know, like, one of them is Sin. Sin's a really good friend of mine, and I promise you, that guy does not have a problem closing.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

We literally tangled dicks on Tuesdays, they cross the. It's called Tiddly tick. On Tuesday, we cross the streams all the time.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

There's three people in your area. In your area you should be hanging.

[Brian Green]

What area is that? The western hemisphere. I mean, what is he talking about?

[Adam the Liar]

If you've met him, you'll know. You can see the kind of person he comes across as. He's not the kind of guy.

[Brian Green]

You can see the kind of person he comes across as not the kind of person he is.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

We have an Instagram reel that has almost a million views. And it's. What when I said one time, I said, don't you know what kind of person I think I am? Yeah, that's what he just said.

[Adam the Liar]

It's gonna freak out if a girl is lying down naked in front of him. You know, he's gonna. He's gonna. He's gonna go for it.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

He's gonna go for it. What?

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Okay, hold on.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

This guy. Sin. I guess.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

He.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

If a girl lays down naked, he's going to go for it.

[Brian Green]

He's going to. He's the kind of guy who's going to go for it. What is that the kind of guy that ends up in jail? I'm not sure. Sexual battery? What are you talking about? This is terrible.

[Adam the Liar]

He's going to.

[Brian Green]

He's going to.

[Adam the Liar]

He's going to go for it. Spear in Miami. He's.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Spear. What are these guys doing?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Spear in Miami.

[Brian Green]

Spear Sin and Lion over here. It's a triple threat.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Spear.

[Brian Green]

Spear.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Spear in Miami.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I open eye, open. He kidnaps Spear, gets him.

[Adam the Liar]

Somebody else who really doesn't have a problem closing. Whatever you may think of his methods.

[Brian Green]

Or by the way, these names sound like names from, like a kid's cartoon. Like the evil trio from a Sin.

[Adam the Liar]

Spirit.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

The lion, but Mickey Mouse is here to defeat them.

[Adam the Liar]

Way that he goes about or potentially his dress. I'm not gonna pick on him about his dress. He's a friend of mine, but, you know, whatever. He's a good friend.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

The point is, he's a good friend. I just like to, you know, tell.

[Brian Green]

Him how shitty he is all the time.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He was dressed the worst, but he's a friend. I love him.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

He's a friend of mine. I love him.

[Brian Green]

I love him.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

He's morally bankrupt, but I love him.

[Brian Green]

He's great.

[Adam the Liar]

He does Close. And the guy that from P Way training has been up here. Psych. But I know he's inside.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Psych.

[Brian Green]

Spears, Sin and lying in mystery. Let's throw in mystery.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I mean, are these. They're like pua. Names.

[Brian Green]

Of course they are.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Okay, so they're not like, hey, what's your name? It's Spear.

[Brian Green]

It's part of the attractiveness, I think, about coming into one of these, like, communities is that you get a cool.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

It's like they're like sixth graders, honestly.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Your Spear, your sin, your sin, your spike, your chlamydia.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You're a bad dresser already.

[Adam the Liar]

There's a guy that can close. They all live in Florida. That's really cool. I'm sure they would love me right now to pitch their programs. Don't just take them out for a drink. Get them drunk. They'll tear for free.

[Brian Green]

I'm sure they're happy to hear that. Rousing endorsement.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Don't worry about paying them. Just go get drunk with them. They'll teach you for free. They all live in Florida.

[Brian Green]

You don't say.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It's like 13 hours to go from tip.

[Brian Green]

I know. Yeah. It's the biggest state in the. I mean, it's the longest state, I think, in the country. Oh, yeah. Okay. I'm totally wrong. It's the seventh largest, richest state in the union.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

But you get the point.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

But there's three.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

In Florida.

[Brian Green]

Well, there's three guys you just take out and get them drunk and you are going to get laid. Laid. Laid.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

They'll teach you all their secrets.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. How wonderful these guys must feel. They're like, great. Bunch of are going to try and buy me drinks at the Chili's.

[Adam the Liar]

All three of those guys drink when they get a little bit of whiskey in them. Free lessons.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Take them out, get them drunk.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I don't even want to learn about game.

[Adam the Liar]

I just want to get you drunk and then start asking them. Take advantage of the fact they live in your area. It's a great thing to do.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

Like, especially as they really do know what they're talking about. But I want to help you.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I. I want to, but now that. But pay me, don't pay them.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

What a terrible.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Also, how are you supposed to get in touch with Sin? Like, I mean, say you're in Tampa.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And Sin is UP Orlando in St. Augustine.

[Brian Green]

What is he doing? Just riding around the bars looking.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Anybody seen Sid or Spear or Cheetos or tire iron?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'm looking for Spear or wheelchair.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I'm looking for one of those guys.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Spear in Miami.

[Brian Green]

Spear give you something while I am here.

[Adam the Liar]

And I want to take you through some steps of closing and there are some very big issues that. That people up.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Okay.

[Adam the Liar]

And I do want to. Excuse My French. I do want to help you, help you through this.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah. Excuse my friends. Now?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, now or earlier?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I was talking about.

[Brian Green]

I talked a menstrual story.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Oh my God, please. This guy is so disingenuous.

[Adam the Liar]

Honestly, the first thing you're going to realize is it's a logistical problem. I would say nine times out of ten the reason you're not getting laid is legit logistical problem. And this, this student comes up to me one day, he goes, Adam, I've got this problem. I can never bring a girl back to my place. So like, well dude, do you have a justified reason for it? You know, I start going through everything.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I live with my parents.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I'm currently living in a Motel 6.

[Brian Green]

With six other PUAs.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

We're in the program.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

It's me, wheelchair dabs, Signature and bull ride. We're all in there together. Now listen, just get us drunk and we'll tell you everything you need to know.

[Adam the Liar]

Yeah, yeah, I've got all that. I've got all that. And I was thinking, I don't understand why you can't get this girl back to your place. Like what's the problem? Like, like is there anything unusual about your house I should know?

[Brian Green]

He goes, oh yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

I live two and a half hours away from the nightclub.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

What?

[Brian Green]

Wait, this sounds strangely like a night that Chrissy and I had one night.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Didn't we take a two hour cab ride to a bar one time?

[Brian Green]

It's like $180.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

But we had to go for work.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I know we had to go for.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Work, but it was way.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, but we knew that driving 200 miles was not an option.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

We took a cab.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

We knew the alcohol was too inviting.

[Brian Green]

We were never going to get out of there. So it going to happen. So we took a cab all the way there and then we're like counting dollars to see if we had enough money to get the cab home.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You got a five?

[Brian Green]

I think we're up to 100.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I've got some change.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I know. I think we paid that guy in loose coins.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

If only queef coin.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, if only queef coin was around. Queef coin.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Who? Why is this? Why, why is this guy going two and a half hours to the nightclub, to the night, his nightclub?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Because Florida is the size of Amsterdam.

[Brian Green]

It's the size of Netherlands.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I mean there's probably one a little closer than two and a half hours. And yes, this makes sense. A girl is not going to come back to your. No, I'm being kidnapped.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Well, she's going to sober up in that.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

There's the Everglades.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I live in the middle of the Everglades at a gator factory.

[Adam the Liar]

Like that would be your problem. Then you have a logistical issue. And he goes, yeah, but right, if I've gamed her well enough, she'll just want to come back, right? Yeah, if you've gamed her well enough over a month, perhaps that two and a half hour journey is long and boring. At the end of a night of fun and drinking and merriment. It's enough to time to sober up. It's enough time.

[Brian Green]

It's enough time to sober up and realize what an you really are.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, you can't let him get sober.

[Brian Green]

Do you mind dropping me off here?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

It's the middle of the Everglades. I'll take my chances with the alligators. I got in the car and you played Rush. I knew it was over.

[Brian Green]

You ever heard of Rush?

[Promo/Announcements Voice]

I'm out.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

See you later.

[Adam the Liar]

Well acquainted that you could in the back of the cab on the way home, let alone wait until you get home. In fact, the cab is a better logistical offer than your house. You gotta plan it like, you gotta take into account these logistics. And I would say 90% of the time the thing that's fucking you up is logistics you haven't planned for them. Me, my logistics were always completely, perfectly flawless.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Always, always, always flawless.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

When I'm ready, this open is set. I can look over at Spear and Choo Cha and I say, hey boys, what's the plan if we game it out on a whiteboard there at the bar? I'm gonna rent a motel room next door. I'm gonna have a wheelchair ready for when she passes out. I'm gonna roll over into an ADA accessible room.

[Adam the Liar]

I set everything up to a T before I went out. Lights, music, everything was set up. And I'm going to take you through how I would go about setting things up before I left my house. You know why I didn't. Before I left my house, I did it so it would be ready for when I came home. I also put pressure on myself because I know that I've set up my house to be.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, he's not even saying, like getting her back to the house. I thought that was the problem.

[Brian Green]

That was the problem. But Adam is flawless. He's not addressing the actual question. All these guys taking lessons from Frankie B. Don't actually address the actual question. Talk around it. That's so many of our problems today in the United States have to do with talking around the actual problem. And this guy is a perfect example. The guy said, I live two and a half hours away from the bar car. You know what I would say?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Set up your music.

[Brian Green]

Did you Set up your music to set up your music? Did you?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Your music.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You need to get some candles, put them in your car, light them up, get the music playing, keep the engine running. Have a condom tied to two little strings. When you open the door, you slide right into it.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Pants down, kind of on.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

That's right. And they get a little bucket, a little, like, toy bucket. And as soon as you hit those strings, wings, it flies down. With lube, you got a condom ready to go in lube. You're leaving too many things up to chance. You gotta get it all prepped before you go. Takes me four days to prep my house. I have my condom set up in a little loop. I run in the door, drop my trowel, run into the condom, fully hard, ready to go. I jump on the bed, I grab her. I'm like Ferris Bueller before when he set up the room. I've got a string attached to a mannequin. I open the door, the mannequin falls over, the condom comes on. Lube applied. Airwick goes off. Fresh scent. Maybe queef coin ready to go. Done and dusted.

[Adam the Liar]

Me, when I come home to get laid, I know that if I come home without a girl, I feel really stupid walking through my house alone. So it always encouraged me to make sure I actually did something about it. But I brought somebody home.

[Brian Green]

I want to remind everybody in the audience, Adam is married. He's not even single. He's married. So he has no clue what he's talking about because he's married. He goes home to the same person every night. And he will tell you that he does.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Does.

[Adam the Liar]

And I'm going to take. Take you through it. What I did in my house was I set up the lighting so that by the front door, it was really, really light. But in my bedroom, there was a low glow.

[Brian Green]

Glow.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

You know those Halloween glow sticks? I put them around the floor.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

This is so.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's just telling about what he did, does or did or would do.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Again, this is not. You're not telling anything about getting the girl from there to your house.

[Brian Green]

This is why I never got late. I didn't get, like a ton of action when I was single, is because I would just turn off the lights before I left. That's what I would do. TV off, lights off. Just like My dad taught me, don't waste electricity. There's people on earth who don't have electricity. Turn it off. And then I'd come in and flip on the lights, like, what else you need to do?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I know.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

To the house, it was like tiered like this. So each room got lighter as you got to the front door.

[Brian Green]

The reason is it got lighter as you.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The front door.

[Brian Green]

What is this, Disney World? What are we on, Pirates of the Caribbean or what's going on here?

[Adam the Liar]

I had mood light on. When you walk into my house, the first things you do is turn the light switches on. It would kill any hope I had of creating that sexual movie mood. So I had the light bit on.

[Sponsor Voice]

By the front of the house.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

She saw me.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

She got me, I'm done.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Boom.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

That's why I have the Uber waiting outside. If she hits the light switch, I say, uber's outside, baby. Sorry, sorry I wasted your time.

[Adam the Liar]

She'd come in, it'd be bright. I'd be like, this is my house.

[Brian Green]

Oh, lovely.

[Adam the Liar]

I'm like, hey, let me take you through to the next room. As you walk down, the light lights a bit dimmer and dimmer and dimmer. You create that light, that nice little.

[Brian Green]

Mood swing goes through.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

If anybody in the audience is believing that this actually works, you're a God. I don't know a single woman, and I know a lot of them just like most of us do, who are way smarter than this. Yes. Like, they.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

They are not looking to sleep with you Based on the lighting in your apartment. They want to know. Yeah. Your tiered lighting. If they're looking to get laid, they're going to have sex with you.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

If they're not looking to get laid.

[Brian Green]

It'S not going to happen. That's. They're human beings just like the rest of us. And I do not walk into my house and decide, get a boner based on the light. I just don't. It's a fact. Well, maybe if the. Maybe if that bulb is sexy. It's got those nice curves, those old style light bulbs with the bubble butt. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, get me some right in that filament.

[Adam the Liar]

This thing is music. You guys bring a girl home. Like some people, especially poets, they're shocked when they bring a girl home.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

They don't know what's.

[Adam the Liar]

Oh, my God, she's. She's in my house. I better find some music. And then they're gonna spend half an hour looking through itunes. No good, no good, no good. I had a playlist set up specifically for bringing a chick home.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Specifically specific. Same nightly.

[Brian Green]

Who spends a half an hour.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

SNL playlist.

[Brian Green]

SNL playlist, same night, lay playlist. Who spends a half an hour looking through a playlist, figuring out what to play? No, Chrissy.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, no.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Half song only.

[Brian Green]

That's who does have song. I know you're a good dj.

[Adam the Liar]

The way it went through was the first few tracks were quite nice, upbeat club tracks that continued from the nightclub around the world.

[Brian Green]

Around, around, around, around, around.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Here, let me take you into the next bedroom.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Are Yellow Jack Johnson.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

That's.

[Brian Green]

Dave Matthews. Crash into me. Crash into me.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

And then Sha Day at the end.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Adam the Liar]

Slowly move down lower, lower, lower until about 12 songs down when it was.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Like.

[Adam the Liar]

Slow pumping music. Right. And that's. That's how it.

[Brian Green]

Since when is slow pumping music? Fucking drum and bass, kid.

[Adam the Liar]

I would have that entire thing going through my house and I just had this playlist. Now do not make this typical stupid mistake of calling your playlist Adam's fucking music. Okay? That's not cool. You go, I'm just going to put some music on. Adam's music.

[Brian Green]

Like.

[Adam the Liar]

No, I mean, it's my music, not whatever. It's bad. It's bad all round.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The fact that you're having to say this.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, he's just making this up as he goes along. He's just making it up as he goes along. He's trying desperately to string an hour of conversation together that makes any kind of sense whatsoever. And he's wasting time on side notes that this is not. These guys cannot communicate with the opposite sex because they have some kind of block. That's what they need to get rid of, is the block. You need to install some confidence in who they are as a person so that they feel confident to talk to other people.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah. Not tricks.

[Brian Green]

That's right. Tricks are not gonna do it.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

It might do it once, but it's.

[Brian Green]

Not gonna do it a lot, I promise you.

[Adam the Liar]

Cool. I think mine was called like Chill Out. That's nice name Chill Out. Like, that was a good name. So kind of a name for it. And then you just walk in. I go, I'm just gonna play whatever I was listening to earlier play. Oh, yeah, it's some rock tracks I was listening to before going out.

[Brian Green]

Whatever it is. Yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

So you've got that entire thing just easing over. The music's playing. The next thing you want to sort.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Out, well, let me make sure that your bed.

[Brian Green]

How do you get them back to the house? How do you open up the conversation? How do you make it interesting enough for the person to stay around 15 minutes so that you can actually get a phone number or have that conversation with them? You know what that's all about? What's in here, not what's out there.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And so he's. He's paying ATT attention, all the stuff that's out there, but he's missing the entire point because he doesn't know how to admit, how to get, how to make that point. He has no idea. No answers.

[Adam the Liar]

It's in a good state. You don't want her to come in to find some leftover stains from a girl that you had on all fours earlier. Yeah. Clean up. Keep your room in a nice state so when she comes in, it looks good. It looks like you're doing half yourself. I was talking earlier about the little clues that you'll give away to a girl that says you have no females in your life. A messy flat is one of them. When a girl comes into your apartment, if it's a state, she's going to be like, oh, my God, you need to tidy this up. I have a female friend that when she comes to my house, she cleaned the whole thing just because she couldn't stand to sit in dirt.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

This is a true gentleman right here. He let some human being come in.

[Brian Green]

And clean your apartment.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Friends.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Friends. I've been friends with Chrissy for 17 years.

[Brian Green]

Never once has she cleaned my apartment or my house. You want to know why I do it myself?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

I fend for myself.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Unbelievable.

[Brian Green]

All right, let's take a break and we'll be back with more whatever this is.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

In a little while.

[Brian Green]

Okay, I gotta take a break. A deep breath.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

What was that?

[Brian Green]

Oh.

[Promo/Announcements Voice]

Let's cut to the chase. We love you and we want to hear your sweet, angelic voices asking us for advice. So give us a call and leave us a voicemail at 626-ASKTCV3. If you're not ready for that kind of commitment, which I understand, send us a text and send instead at 8:55 TCB8383. And as always, don't forget to follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTokcbpodcast. And this wouldn't be a TCB promo if I didn't tell you to go to our YouTube channel, YouTube.com thecommercial break, to watch all of our amazing video edits. You can also go to tcbpodcast.com to find everything we have ever put on the website. Let's listen to some sponsors, and then we are back on track, baby. Love you. Bye.

[Brian Green]

All right, back with more Adam the Liar. Here we go.

[Adam the Liar]

Come over Thursday afternoon. She's like, why? I'm going out Thursday evening? And she'd be like, I don't get it. I'm like, no, it's fine. Just come over. I'll make lunch. And she'd sit there. She'd be sitting down. She went, oh, my gosh, your dishes. I just have to.

[Brian Green]

Have to do them.

[Adam the Liar]

Oh, all right.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

What a jerk.

[Brian Green]

What an with. God damn it, dude. Honestly.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I mean, even his friends.

[Brian Green]

You even take advantage of your friends and their kindness. That's how you roll. You invite them over before you go out so that they'll get irritated by your messiness and clean up. You take advantage of their ocd. Is that what you do? Like, you take advantage of all the other women in your life, you twad. Love you to come on the show, Adam. Them love it. Just please come on. Because we'll have a frank discussion about how bad you really are at this. Really. And I am no expert. I'm not claiming to be an expert, but I'm a human being. And all it takes is a human being to see what a job you're doing at teaching these guys how to approach the opposite sex or the same sex or whatever they're into.

[Adam the Liar]

Oh, my God, the hoovering. When was the last time you hoovered? No, I think. I think actually you were the last one. The hoover. Two weeks ago. Yeah, yeah, I'll do that for you.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

All right.

[Brian Green]

Okay.

[Adam the Liar]

And that was great. Like, that was the nice little relationship we had.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Here's your eggs sandwich.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah, I know.

[Brian Green]

I cut it into little soldiers for you, Adam. Here you go. You want a binky? You need a nap. Nap? Suck on my tits for a few minutes. This is the kind of relationship we had. He said.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Said.

[Brian Green]

This is the nice relationship.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Had.

[Brian Green]

Had, yeah. Unbelievable.

[Adam the Liar]

Clean my whole house. I'd go clubbing in the evening, come back, clean house, plan it out, make sure everything's right. Like women will they do that?

[Brian Green]

Plan it out.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Take advantage of all the people in your life before you hit the clubs, not after.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, God.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's throwing a wrench into everybody's playing now here too. They're like, I've got to find a female friend.

[Brian Green]

I gotta actually talk to people.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Find a female.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I gotta clean up.

[Brian Green]

I gotta clean up the Mountain Dew cups from my computer room. Unbelievable.

[Adam the Liar]

You've seen it. If you're talking to a girl, and your collar's like this. That kills them. I'm seeing there's, like, three girls in the room. I've got my collar like this, and they're going like this. All they want to do is come up here and fix it. They do. They groom people. They try and help you look better.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Right.

[Adam the Liar]

That's what they're specifically looking to do. So you're going to give away the.

[Brian Green]

Fact that's what women are looking to do. Groom you and clean your house?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, that's it.

[Brian Green]

Wow.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You're born that way.

[Brian Green]

Who raised you? Who raised you, Adam. And how proud she must be.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

Got absolutely zero skills with women if those little touches are wrong. The final thing that was incredibly important. I made sure that by. By the side of my bed were condoms.

[Brian Green]

Condoms. Condom.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, my God.

[Adam the Liar]

You had that problem. You bring a chick home, oh, my God. I got no condom. Anyone that nods at that, shame on you. That means you had no anticipation of getting laid. You assumed you weren't gonna get it. You were just like, yeah, I'm not gonna get laid, so I don't need condoms. Have condoms by the side of your bed. Jarrett's like, I've got it in my pocket. Actually, I keep it here. You gotta make sure you got them in the right place where you're gonna need them.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right?

[Brian Green]

Put them right where you need them.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I've got mine right here.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I want to stick one down your throat, Adam, and see what happens. That's what I want to do.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Do.

[Adam the Liar]

Another thing that I had specifically is when I went out clubbing, I used to bring my motorcycle helmet with me. I brought a spare. I brought a spare.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I brought a spare. And by motorcycle, I mean one of those sprees.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, my God.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

The things with two wheels and a.

[Brian Green]

Lawnmower just walking in with.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Okay, keep going.

[Brian Green]

I got to hear this.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Roadhouse coming in with two bicycle. Like, two motorcycle helmets.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Who's the other helmet for? I don't know.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Maybe you could be the legend girl.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

My friend just cleaned up my apartment. The lights are low, and I got my playlist ready to go. Are you ready? Hop on the bike. My back of my tricycle, and let's go. Ching, ching.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Bring an extra.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Oh, my God. This is too funny.

[Brian Green]

England.

[Adam the Liar]

It was illegal for somebody to ride as a passenger on a motorbike without helmet. If I didn't have a spare helmet, I couldn't bring her home. I said something about myself when I went out with two helmets. I said, I'm bringing a girl home.

[Brian Green]

You said something about yourself.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I mean, I can just see him.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Kind of hard to sidle up to the bar. Too big motorcycle helmets.

[Brian Green]

I mean, unless you have a place to put them. But I mean, I imagine he's walking in with them. They get stolen all the time. But now he's saying that it says something about you. And I can just see the streets of London packed with people on each side. And Adam's riding down with his little scooter. He's gonna get laid.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's. He's got two.

[Brian Green]

Two.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's got two helmets.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

He's got two.

[Brian Green]

He's the Queef Coin founder.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I say something about myself and I walk into a bar with two helmets. Either I'm gonna take someone home or someone just left one of the two, but it says something.

[Adam the Liar]

Two helmets. And every night I came back with a chick plan.

[Brian Green]

Of course.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Logistics.

[Adam the Liar]

Logistics is the one thing that will mess you up, okay? The one thing.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

It's the one thing that'll mess you up.

[Brian Green]

In the whole process of meeting a girl and finding the right one to bed, it's the one thing that'll mess you up. If you get logistics, if you just turn your lighting on correctly in the house before you leave, you're guaranteed to get laid.

[Adam the Liar]

I had this, this, this.

[Brian Green]

One of my.

[Adam the Liar]

One of my instructors turns up at my apartment, my apartment, my hotel room at like 2am with these four chicks and another guy and they come back and he comes up to me like, adam, are you sleeping? I'm like, I was. And he goes, okay.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

He comes up, I open the door and he goes, adam, are you sleeping? No, shithead, I'm at the door.

[Brian Green]

Are you sleeping? Yes, I'm sleeping while I'm talking to you here at the door. Dumb shit.

[Adam the Liar]

Good, I've got some chicks back to the room. I'm going to sell threesome. I'm like, I think it's going to be hard. He's like, why? Like, cuz I'm in the room. And he's like, yeah, no, be fine.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'll be fine.

[Adam the Liar]

I'll keep it quiet.

[Brian Green]

What?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Was he staying with you?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, dude, what guy can't afford his own hotel room? You guys are bunking up.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

The P community is not making you that much money. I bet she's making more money than the podcast community is.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's true.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I bet you that.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Adam the Liar]

Because the girls, back to the room, they spend an hour in the room trying to have a quiet party with no music, and then the girls Leave because it's a bit freaky. And the next morning, he says, what.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Happened to the guy? Well, he said, four girls and another guy.

[Brian Green]

Four guy, four girls, another guy. So now you've essentially just, you know.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Whatever hotel it is. There's like, two double beds.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

The Hampton Inn in Orlando.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. They're playing his ME Playlist, trying to get the lighting correct. This makes no sense whatsoever. This is why Adam is a liar. Yeah, because this makes no sense. You don't just go back to sleep and there's a bunch of people partying in your room. I mean, that's called passed out, not sleeping.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

There's a big difference.

[Adam the Liar]

Kind of what I did wrong.

[Brian Green]

What's that?

[Adam the Liar]

He goes, I shouldn't have brought him to the room. Said, no, you shouldn't have. It was really stupid. And I think in his head, he thought that bringing them to AFC Adam would make it easier to sleep with them. I don't know. I think that's. I think that was his thinking, and he was like, I want to have a threesome, and AFC Adam was my friend.

[Brian Green]

Afc AFC Adam.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I didn't know that was. Is that his name, Champ?

[Brian Green]

I don't know. AFC Adam. AFC Adam. What is that? I gotta know. I'm doing some homework on this one.

[Adam the Liar]

Yeah, roomy's in. So I'll bring the threesome to his room. Then I'll definitely get it. I'm sure that was, like, in his head, but, like, it doesn't work that way. Like, Poors can't. I don't have that.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Why?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, this is a lie.

[Brian Green]

Of course.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Adam would never be, like, sure, I'm still gonna go to sleep, but. Come on. Come on in.

[Brian Green]

No one would do that.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

No one.

[Brian Green]

No one. No, dude, we are grown adults. Get your own room, go home, whatever it is. I don't know. Or you're welcome to spend the night in my place, but you got to get rid of the seven additional people that are with you. It's a Hampton Inn. We're not staying at the High Roller suite in the Win.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Right.

[Brian Green]

Come on. Let's get it together. Welcome.

[Adam the Liar]

I bless this threesome.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Make it happen.

[Adam the Liar]

I don't have that. Not that I know of. So maybe Neil Strauss does. I don't. Okay. He's higher than me. I don't know, but whatever.

[Brian Green]

So he's higher than me.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Who's Neil Strauss?

[Brian Green]

I don't know.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's higher in the POA or pua.

[Brian Green]

The P. Oh, I think he's another famous PO like, mystery. Yeah. I think mystery is at the top. And then there's like, Neil Strauss, Michael Anthony, and then comes these lower, like, grade ones. I don't know. Somebody's got to come on and give me the whole rundown. I need an org chart. Is there an org chart?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

For the plot.

[Adam the Liar]

Logistical problem. He needed to take him somewhere where they would be okay with it. He had to go somewhere else. So logistics will fuck you up, man. So look after logistics. Like, if you can look after anything, look after logistics. Logistics can get you laid as well if you plan your logistics right. And we're going to talk about this. If you've got a justified reason to do absolutely everything, if you can justify bringing her back to your house and then you can justify playing the music and you can justify the sexual. It's all going to happen, happen. So logistics can.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Can be a great justify. I know.

[Brian Green]

What, why, why would you have to justify playing music at your own house? What's going on? Who do you need permission from? Oh, I guess there's an. There's an organization. You have to go to the top. You got to send a quick email, hit them up on Slack. Can I play the music?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

No, no, no, no. No reason to play music. Denied.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Are you justified?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Denied.

[Adam the Liar]

Beneficial thinking.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

All right.

[Adam the Liar]

She's not gonna make this easy for you because she doesn't want to be a slut. If she's making it easy for you, beware, okay? Because you're probably not the first person she's made it easy for.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's why you keep the condoms.

[Brian Green]

Why you keep the condoms next to your bed. That's right.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah. And he's the one who just told a story about the girl the same night.

[Brian Green]

Yes. And l. That he. 99,000 times. 99.9 of the time he does SNLS. So stupid.

[Adam the Liar]

These are really contagious, so be very careful. If she's making it that easy. You don't want it to be easy. You want it to be a challenge. You don't want a chick that's just going to jump on top of you and do whatever you want instantly. You want to work for it a bit. You want to make it happen.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

No, they don't.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

They don't.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

What are you talking about?

[Brian Green]

No human wants friction in that kind of situation. We, of course want it to be easy. And it flows and it's back and forth and everybody excited and you get all hot and bothered if you have.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

To work for it.

[Brian Green]

It feels. Yes, of course. You should work for love. That's not What I'm saying, But we're not talking about love. We're talking about a lay. If you go to a bar looking to get laid, I promise you the last thing you want is her saying no all the time.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

It just makes sense.

[Brian Green]

You think these guys came here to tell you how hard it's going to be?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

No.

[Brian Green]

They want the easy answers.

[Adam the Liar]

You've got to make sure that you're leading the situation. She ain't gonna do it. She doesn't want to be a slut. So you're gonna have to make sure that you. You're controlling these situations, guiding her through and making sure that you're. You're pushing forward for the next step. One of the best ways of doing.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Make sure you're ordering drink after drink.

[Brian Green]

After drink after drink. Pushing through to the next step. This is like a sales seminar or something. I feel like I'm at so bad. I feel like I'm at a sales conference at the old radio station.

[Adam the Liar]

I know is to be empathic. Now this is something that I've noticed makes great poers different from people that aren't great poor. It's the ability to observe someone's facial expressions and tone of voice and language and understand what emotion that person is feeling. I can talk to a girl and very quickly I can tell whether she's completely freaked out by me or if she's attractive. My experience of talking to so many women has helped me with that.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Is that most of them.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that most of them are freaked out by you.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

What other reaction would you get?

[Brian Green]

I don't know. Oh, my God.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

All right.

[Brian Green]

Exactly. All right. Okay.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I don't know that I can get.

[Brian Green]

A whole another section of this.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I know.

[Brian Green]

This goes on for two hours, by the way.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Afc, afc Adam.

[Brian Green]

Afc Adam with the SNL and the poise and Spike and Spear.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And Spear?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, Spear.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Who gave him that name here in Miami?

[Brian Green]

Spear in Miami.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Oh, my God.

[Brian Green]

This is insane.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

People.

[Brian Green]

I don't know how, why, when, where anybody would take advice from this guy. But here's my advice. Don't take advice from this guy. He's wrong about all of it. So far so good, Adam. You're wrong about all of it. Do the opposite of what Adam's telling you to do. A well lit home makes women, makes anybody feel comfortable. When you going home with a stranger, a well lit house is probably a good thing. All right. TCBpodcast.com is where you go to get your queef coin. You find out more information about Chrissy and I. You can read all the show notes, all the audio, all the video. It's right there at one location, tcbpodcast.com and if you'd like your free piggy fronting sticker, you can go there. You hit the contact us button. There's a little drop down menu. It says I want my sticker. And then you give us your physical address and we'll send it off. Don't be surprised when the sticker comes. Are you on mute? Are you on mute? Mute. I can't hear you.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Oh no, I lost Chrissy.

[Brian Green]

What happened?

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

All right, it's okay.

[Brian Green]

I'll finish the show. All right.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

626.

[Brian Green]

Ask TCB the number three. That's 626. Ask TCB the Number three. Find out more information about questions, comments, concerns. I'm totally freaked out that I can't hear you anymore.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

I. I know.

[Brian Green]

What happened to you? Oh, there you go.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Go.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Hello?

[Brian Green]

There you are. What happened to you? There you are.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Hello.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Okay. 626 stcv the number three.

[Brian Green]

Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. We're taking them all at that phone line. Text or leave us a voicemail. Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on tick tock and YouTube.com the commercial break for episodes, full episodes, full interviews and clips and every single day of the week. Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I think so.

[Brian Green]

So I'll tell you that I love you.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I love you.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Best to you, best to you and.

[Brian Green]

Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

That's all you get now. So go on.

[Adam the Liar]

And.

[Co-host (possibly a producer or another host)]

Sam.