TCB Classic: The Meta Best Of Frankie B!

Summary

Summary of "TCB Classic: The Meta Best Of Frankie B!"

Podcast Information:

• Title: The Commercial Break
• Host/Author: Comedy Podcast | Commercial Break LLC
• Episode: TCB Classic: The Meta Best Of Frankie B!
• Release Date: June 3, 2025

Introduction In this special episode of The Commercial Break, hosts Bryan Green and Chrissy Hoadley dive into a humorous and critical exploration of Frank Bernardo, popularly known as Frankie B., whose content has garnered significant attention and ridicule. This episode serves as a meta-best-of compilation, showcasing some of Frankie's most infamous segments focused on detecting cheating in marriages.

Overview of Frankie B.'s Content Frankie B. is portrayed as a YouTube personality offering dubious advice on identifying signs of infidelity in one's spouse. His approach is characterized by exaggerated paranoia, sexist remarks, and nonsensical tips that blend pseudo-advice with over-the-top theatrics.

Key Discussions and Critiques

1. Frankie B.'s Advice on Detecting Cheating

   • Frankie's Tips: Frankie presents a series of "telltale signs" suggesting that sudden changes in a spouse's behavior—such as altered social media activity, increased gym attendance, improved appearance, and changes in routine—are definitive indicators of cheating.
     • Notable Quote: “[00:02] Brian: Are you buying a home in California? Yeah. It can feel like trying to solve a puzzle with a hundred missing pieces...” (Note: This initial quote relates to a commercial break advertisement and is not directly part of the main discussion.)

2. Hosts' Reactions and Humor

   • Bryan and Chrissy’s Mockery: The hosts express skepticism and amusement towards Frankie's advice, often breaking into laughter over his absurd claims and over-the-top delivery.
     • Notable Quote: “[02:03] Brian: Hey there cats and kittens. As was completely predictable, absolutely unavoidable and probably much needed. There is no way in hell you're getting a new episode of the commercial break today...” (Sets the tone for the episode's deviation into Frankie's content.)
     • Notable Quote: “[05:03] Frank Bernardo: What is going on, everybody?” followed by “[05:04] Eddie: Whoa, whoa. What's going on, everybody? I've been taking steroids since I was 27 years old...” (Hosts react to Frankie's exaggerated self-introduction.)

3. Exaggerated Claims and Satire

   • Frankie's Over-the-Top Assertions: Frankie claims alarming statistics about infidelity, such as “53% of all wives cheat on their husbands,” which the hosts immediately challenge.
     • Notable Quote: “[85:07] Frankie: I would guarantee you’re not just watching a Frankie Beat video randomly if your wife is not cheating on you...” (Frankie presents questionable statistics.)
     • Hosts' Interjection: “[86:00] Chrissy: What? He did...” (Highlighting the absurdity of Frankie's claims.)

4. Critique of Frankie's Methodology

   • Lack of Concrete Advice: The hosts criticize Frankie for failing to provide actionable or realistic advice, instead offering vague and contradictory tips that confuse rather than help.
     • Notable Quote: “[45:19] Frankie: So if you were a man, 60, so you’re looking for a woman, 10 years younger, how hard is it? How small?” (Frankie's unclear guidance on age preferences.)
     • Chrissy’s Commentary: “[50:56] Chrissy: Frankie's so afraid of getting cheated on that he needs to see what's going on 24 hours.” (Mocks Frankie's obsessive nature.)

5. Hosts' Personal Takeaways and Satire

   • Humorous Strategies: Bryan and Chrissy propose absurd and humorous alternatives to Frankie's advice, such as hiding one's phone or experiencing over-the-top paranoia.
     • Notable Quote: “[26:00] Chrissy: I love you, Frank. Call me 470-584-8449. Leave a message.” (Satirical take on Frankie's solicitation for engagement.)
     • Notable Quote: “[75:43] Eddie: If you say let's get cranking, one...” (Mocking Frankie's clichéd phrases.)

6. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

   • Reflection on Frankie's Impact: The hosts conclude by highlighting the entertainment value of Frankie's content, despite its lack of genuine substance. They emphasize the chaotic and unfiltered nature of The Commercial Break as a stark contrast to Frankie's scripted and exaggerated advice.
     • Notable Quote: “[126:03] Chrissy: I don't know. I did.” (Bryan acknowledges the humor derived from Frankie's antics.)
     • Final Remarks: “[125:55] Brian: It should also be noted that that is the longest episode in commercial break history...” (Wraps up the episode by referencing the extensive parody of Frankie's content.)

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Bryan Green: “[02:35] Brian: Don'T go all that well either.”
• Chrissy Hoadley: “[05:26] Chrissy: That's two welcomes in one minute. Just want to let you know that.”
• Eddie: “[08:14] Frankie: Think.”
• Frankie Bernardo: “[15:14] Frankie: She's doing cheating is not cheating. Let me tell you something. Cheating is a way to a better marriage if you're a man.”
• Chrissy Hoadley: “[28:08] Thumbtack: You just realized your business needed to hire someone yesterday?...”
• Eddie: “[37:03] Eddie: Have you. How do you smell?”
• Frankie Bernardo: “[54:04] Eddie: You better have it. You better have a rock hard penis the second you walk in the door.”
• Chrissy Hoadley: “[74:02] Frankie: It?”

Final Thoughts "TCB Classic: The Meta Best Of Frankie B!" offers a satirical and comedic take on Frank Bernardo's misguided attempts to offer advice on marital fidelity. Through witty banter and sharp critiques, Bryan and Chrissy highlight the absurdity of Frankie's claims, providing listeners with both laughter and a critical perspective on dubious self-help content. This episode underscores The Commercial Break's commitment to blending humor with insightful commentary, making it a relatable and entertaining escape for its audience.

Transcript

[Brian]

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[Brian]

Hey there cats and kittens. As was completely predictable, absolutely unavoidable and probably much needed. There is no way in hell you're getting a new episode of the commercial break today. There's 13 of them that we just.

[Chrissy]

Did over the weekend.

[Brian]

So go listen to one, if not all of those. If you haven't already. To be frank, TCB's endless day kind of went off without a hitch. That is very much unlike anything we have ever done outside of the box. Well, let's be honest, inside the box too.

[Chrissy]

Usually the episodes of the commercial break.

[Brian]

Don'T go all that well either. But Chrissy and I just want to say thank you one more time to the hundreds of comments and text messages, phone calls and well wishes from across the states and across the world, if you will. Yes, that's right. One guy in India texted in to tell me I was doing such a good job and he read my resume and has a job for me where I make over $10,000 an hour. And if I wasn't obligated contractually to.

[Chrissy]

Do this show, it's likely I'd take him up on the offer.

[Brian]

When I asked the new encyclopedia of the commercial break Chat tcb, what is the most talked about and requested topic on the commercial break? Coming in at number three was our good friend Frankie B. It's no surprise that during the Endless Day we got a lot of text messages early in the day asking us if and when we would touch on Frankie B. And did toward the end. And while there hasn't exactly been a waterfall of new content from Frankie B, we did get a few short videos from him over the last month. However, there was a time in Frankie's history and in the commercial breaks history when there was a new video out almost daily. As my grandfather said, that made for good groceries and Chrissy and I ate on those groceries and ate on those groceries and ate on those groceries. So when I asked Chat TCB if I was to run a classic episode to give the listeners a exactly what they want, it referred me to this episode, episode 73, which is kind of meta. Because episode number three is a best of TCB. Maybe one of our first and the best of is all about Frankie B. It's essentially all the segments of Frankie B that we had done up until that point in one episode. So at the expense of being meta meta, I am going to run that episode almost unedited to. So everything you hear after this intro is from early 2021. I will only adjust it in two ways. I will cut out the old phone numbers so you don't call them and I will add in Rachel's liners where she tells you where to go currently so you're not texting some guy in Iowa named John who won't give me my phone number back anyway. That's a joke you won't get unless.

[Chrissy]

You listen to tcb's Endless Day.

[Brian]

I'm gonna be screaming right in your face from the very start of this episode. And excuse the audio quality cause in 2020, a long way from where we are today, we will be back Tomorrow with a brand new episode of the commercial break. Until then, bye.

[Frank Bernardo]

What is going on, everybody?

[Eddie]

Whoa, whoa. What's going on, everybody? I've been taking steroids since I was 27 years old and I just did two lines of cocaine and I took some Red Bull right before I got out of here.

[Frank Bernardo]

And welcome to another video. If you're new here, welcome. My name is Frank Bernardo.

[Chrissy]

That's two welcomes in one minute. Just want to let you know that.

[Frank Bernardo]

This channel is geared.

[Chrissy]

Frank Bernardo is who we're listening to. I just. I want to make sure that we know who we're listening to.

[Frankie]

I want to do a double welcome.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, welcome. I'd like to welcome everybody. We want to welcome you. How welcome. How welcoming can we be? Welcome. Just say welcome for all guys out.

[Frank Bernardo]

There, 50 and above who want to up their game, look and feel better about themselves. So gentlemen, at any time during a video, if you like what you see, if you find it informational, hell, if you even get a good laugh out of it, do me a favor, give it one of these and hit the subscribe button.

[Chrissy]

Not only do I want to subscribe, but I'm horny. I'm just horny because of this guy talking. I want you to know that Frank's chant. If you can find Frank Bernardo's channel on YouTube, he's got many, many videos. He'd like his. I can't. You can't see it because you're listening to this on a podcast. Unless you're watching YouTube. And I can't play it because it's someone else's YouTube video. I mean, I guess I could, but he has a. He has a channel and he focuses on entertainment, fitness, food, women, grooming, fashion styling, men with low T, Men with low T and erectile dysfunction. This guy, his opening montage has all. It just comes up and it says, Frank Bernardo, fashion.

[Eddie]

Frank Bernardo, grooming fashion expert.

[Chrissy]

He's an all round expert on everything over 50. If you have a dick. Here we go.

[Frank Bernardo]

So you don't miss my upcoming videos. So, guys, you found this video for a reason. All right? Maybe you are suspecting your wife is cheating and does it happen? Absolutely. You see?

[Eddie]

Absolutely. Absolutely. Is your wife cheating on you? Absolutely. You found this video for a reason. You found this video for a reason. Your wife asked for a divorce.

[Frank Bernardo]

Yes, unfortunately, we always get labeled as a cheaters. But guess what? Our wives are actively cheating as well.

[Eddie]

This is like a huge assumption to make.

[Frankie]

Like, I mean, is he talking to me?

[Eddie]

I think he's talking to everybody.

[Chrissy]

Oh, well, doesn't even bring Henry into this conversation because then we got two nuts talking at the same time.

[Frank Bernardo]

Oh, yeah, they're sexting other guys. They're going on dates. They're having full blown affairs. Guys.

[Eddie]

Wait.

[Chrissy]

Women are having full blown affairs?

[Eddie]

Is this true?

[Chrissy]

Not in my country. This guy's out of his mind. What is he talking about? Women are sexting and having full blown affairs. Women do not even have phones.

[Eddie]

This is crazy talk.

[Chrissy]

This is crazy business. This guy is out of his gourd.

[Eddie]

Keep going.

[Chrissy]

I'm having good laugh over here.

[Eddie]

Okay, okay.

[Frank Bernardo]

Eating is cheating. If you feel that something's not.

[Chrissy]

Cheating is not cheating. Let me tell you something. Cheating is a way to a better marriage if you're a man. And cheating is. It does not even think.

[Frankie]

Think.

[Chrissy]

There's a word for it in my country. If a woman's doing it, I think it's called jail.

[Eddie]

That's what it's called, jail.

[Frank Bernardo]

Not quite right. Come on, guys, use your head. You got instinct you're feeling in your gut. Chances are she's cheating on you. If you know the signs of a cheating wife, you can figure out what to do before the bad news hits you.

[Eddie]

Wait, hold on, wait. Figure out what to do before the bad news hits you.

[Brian]

But you.

[Chrissy]

If you find out your wife is cheating, you can find out what to do before you find out your wife is cheating.

[Eddie]

You can literally roll back the hands of time. Nothing like I'm gonna show you how to time travel right now.

[Frankie]

Nothing like a paranoid husband.

[Eddie]

This guy sounds like a mix between Alex Jones and Dr. Phil. And he's saying it as if all women are cheating. Women are out there sex messaging. They're having full blown affairs. They're literally sucking dick on the street corner. Your wife's vagina is getting pounded right now in the gym and you don't even know it. This guy sounds like he's been through.

[Chrissy]

Many failed marriages, by the way. I'm just making an assumption, Frank. I'm sorry if I'm wrong.

[Frank Bernardo]

Without further ado, let's get into tip number one, that you might have a cheating wife. You disappeared from her social media. There used to be pictures of you and her lovely dog.

[Eddie]

I would say that Frank's probably right about it. If you. If you are not on her social media anymore.

[Frankie]

Now it's a new dude.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

If you've been replaced by another guy on social media, your wife's probably having.

[Frankie]

An affair with that guy.

[Eddie]

You probably also missed the divorce proceedings or the Paperwork still in the mail. I mean, come on, Frank.

[Chrissy]

What are you talking about now? Listen to how Frank talks about social media. This just cracks me up.

[Frank Bernardo]

Vacations, daily stuff, grandkids, children.

[Eddie]

Grandkids. She's got grandkids with another wife. With another man. If your wife has grandkids you don't know about, she's probably cheating on you. You don't say, Frank. Tell you it isn't so.

[Frank Bernardo]

You'Re gone. Why is that? You're being ghost.

[Frankie]

You're being ghosted by your wife.

[Chrissy]

You're being ghost. It's ghosted, Frank.

[Eddie]

It's ghosted. Not you're being ghost. What is this? This is the episode of Casper.

[Chrissy]

I know.

[Eddie]

If you have Nico on your homepage, you're getting cheated on. Your wife is having an affair with a ghost dog. She's literally taking it up the ass from a dog that doesn't exist.

[Frank Bernardo]

Why is that? Well, she wants to appear single. She wants to appear that she's not having a relationship. That's always a monster. Sign is if you get ghosts.

[Eddie]

If you get ghosts on social media.

[Chrissy]

You'Re getting cheated on social media.

[Frank Bernardo]

Chances are she wants to appear single and something's up. Tip number two, that your wife might be cheating on you.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, we were just on one.

[Frankie]

Okay, now we're going to.

[Eddie]

I felt like we had, like, five.

[Chrissy]

Different things in there. This video is only four minutes long, by the way. But the second I started watching it, Hoadly, I was just like. I was sitting here at midnight last night laughing out loud. I'm sure my children woke up because I was laughing out loud at this guy. His videos are. They're all precious. We're gonna have to check in with Frank many times. This is the beginning of a fruitful relationship with Frank. I love you, Frank. Call me 470-584-8449. Leave a message.

[Frank Bernardo]

Look at her cell phone, gentlemen. Now, she's always had to ring her volume up on loud, which I'm sure she had for years. Especially if you have kids and you're out at a restaurant, you're out at a function, she's gonna want to hear that phone ring. And then all of a sudden.

[Frankie]

Hold on.

[Eddie]

If your wife has ears, she's cheating on you.

[Frankie]

Wait. I mean, the assumption that you're. What? Like that all women want their phone on loud all the time. And then all of a sudden, if you start turning her ringer to silent to you in a restaurant.

[Chrissy]

In a restaurant. I mean.

[Frankie]

Yeah, all of a sudden, she's Courteous. And she's cheating.

[Eddie]

If you're watching Ave Maria at the local orchestra and she's turned her phone off, you're cheating. Call the divorce attorney.

[Frankie]

Quick. Take a picture and post it to Facebook.

[Eddie]

That's right, post it to Facebook.

[Chrissy]

Of the two of you because you've been ghost.

[Eddie]

I dated this girl. She never called me back. I got ghosts. Ghosted. Put an Ed back there. You one.

[Chrissy]

He's. Okay, just let me continue.

[Eddie]

Because he. He's.

[Chrissy]

He's funny in and of himself. We probably don't even mean to make jokes.

[Frank Bernardo]

Notice that that phone has been on the silent mode for quite a while. So she switched. There's a reason why. Because she doesn't want you asking questions.

[Frankie]

I thought he was gonna say he doesn't want. She doesn't want you, asshole.

[Eddie]

Yes, if your wife doesn't want you. If your wife doesn't like you, it's likely you're being cheated on.

[Chrissy]

Just the audacity. I mean, this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. He says if your wife has her ringer on and then she turns it off.

[Frankie]

Like his personal story.

[Chrissy]

It is his personal story. Of course it is. Look how charged up this guy is. I mean, again, he's been on steroids and cocaine since the 80s. But, yeah, you should see this guy. He is just, like, built like a rock house. He's from. I bet $1,000 he's from Chicago. With that accent.

[Eddie]

Hi, guys. Hi, guys.

[Chrissy]

He sounds like my mom. He's like the male version of my mom.

[Frank Bernardo]

So if that ringer is on the silent mode, chances are she's hiding something.

[Eddie]

If you are at a function, she's hiding the ringtone because she doesn't want to hear it. You right, idiot.

[Chrissy]

Everyone turns on and off the ringer. That's not a thing. It's not a thing.

[Frankie]

Mine's off right now in the studio.

[Brian]

If I am.

[Frankie]

Yeah, I'm cheating on.

[Chrissy]

Mine's probably off. I should check that. You're cheating on me if I turn off my ringer. If you're having an affair. I'm not saying that I am, but if you're having an affair, it's not about turning on and off the ringer.

[Frankie]

It's really not.

[Chrissy]

It's really not. You're missing the whole fucking point, Frank. It's about not calling them, you know, not making evidence whatsoever. Right? You have a secret phone number, like 470-584-8449. Call me, Frank. I want to talk to you live on There.

[Frank Bernardo]

If you are at a restaurant and you see her fidgeting on that phone a little bit, all right, she grabs it. You don't hear a ring.

[Chrissy]

You.

[Frank Bernardo]

She hears, she feels the buzz, she feels the hum. She knows she's getting her call in there. And then 10, 15 minutes, she's gonna wait, she's gonna want to go to the bathroom, she's gonna want to contact that person. Don't let her take her phone. Get a reaction out of that. See if she gets jumpy. See if she gets fidgety. Tell her just leave the phone right here.

[Chrissy]

Go to the restroom, see if she gets jumpy. See if she gets fidgety. Kidnap her, hold her hostage there in the restaurant. What a chauvinist.

[Eddie]

What a but a fuck.

[Chrissy]

Oh, I cannot imagine the drama would be caused if I told Astrid to leave her phone at the table when she went to the bathroom for no particular reason except for my fucking paranoia.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Frankie]

I would be like, okay, yeah, that's crazy weird.

[Chrissy]

Holdy, I want you to leave your phone right there. And if you get fidgety about it, I know you're cheating on me. That's great dinnertime conversation, by the way.

[Eddie]

You should do that.

[Frankie]

She grabs it real quick. Grabs it real quick.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I know.

[Frankie]

Can you imagine being this exactly happened to him?

[Eddie]

This.

[Chrissy]

Had this, this whole thing happened to him and only in hindsight did he.

[Eddie]

Realize that all of those things were signs that he was being cheated on.

[Chrissy]

After he's had five years and six 20 year old girlfriends to think about it?

[Frank Bernardo]

Yeah, you'll watch it. And if she does, that's your chance to go through her phone and see who's calling her.

[Eddie]

That's your chance to break the law right there.

[Frank Bernardo]

Wife might be cheating on you.

[Eddie]

Number three.

[Frank Bernardo]

Sudden she's at the gym every day. She only used to go maybe one or two days a week.

[Eddie]

Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank.

[Chrissy]

It's all coming together now. Frank, I starting to understand what exactly happened to you. Your wife was fucking the pool boy.

[Frankie]

Right in front of a trainer at the gym.

[Chrissy]

Exactly right in front of you. And you were too busy at Hair Club for Men that you didn't realize what was going on until it was too late. But that doesn't mean that every woman that goes to the gym is cheating on her husband. That's a ridiculous connotation. No, this connotation even makes sense in that.

[Frank Bernardo]

Yes, okay, 40 minutes, okay? In and out. Now all of a sudden she's up the game. She's there five days A week?

[Eddie]

Five days a week.

[Frank Bernardo]

We did go to the gym. She really didn't care what she looked like. She had her frumpy clothes.

[Frankie]

Wait, hold on. Just pause this for one second because. Let me just. Let me just say.

[Chrissy]

Clarify.

[Frankie]

So if she was just going one or two days a week, she didn't give a shit.

[Chrissy]

Shit about how she looked like.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

That's why she was going to the gym. To get fatter.

[Frankie]

You don't go at all.

[Chrissy]

At all. You don't give a shit what you look like. You're never going to, by the way, going to the gym one or two days a week is a big fucking effort.

[Frankie]

It is?

[Chrissy]

Yeah. To get out of the house and go to the gym, first of all. And now he's saying.

[Frankie]

And then maybe she got into it and liked it.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Maybe she's feeling good about herself. Maybe she's a human being, Frank.

[Eddie]

Maybe she wants some self respect. Maybe she wants to get out of.

[Chrissy]

The hole that you've dug her in the backyard to live.

[Frankie]

She's married to you.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. A true story, Frank.

[Frank Bernardo]

No makeup, hair pulled up. Didn't give a crap what she looked like. Now all of a sudden, she's bought some new gym clothes. She's got her makeup all about hurry.

[Eddie]

She has her own money. She's using a credit card. She knows how to go. She knows how to pay a bill. This is crazy.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I know. Signs a woman is. Is cheating on you.

[Eddie]

She learned how to drive a car.

[Frankie]

How to speak.

[Eddie]

Yeah. She talks in sentences. She can write a text message. She uses the bathroom without permission. She gets out of bed before you tell her it's okay. She doesn't say yes when you tell her to put on her handcuffs. She speaks in public without approval.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Hair is pretty. She's taking more time and getting ready to go to the gym. All right. There's a reason why she's trying to impress someone. But don't get too hung up on that.

[Rachel]

She could.

[Frankie]

Wait, wait. Don't get too hung up on that part. You just said was the worst. Was like the worst part. But don't get hung up on that part. Has he got a fourth one?

[Chrissy]

He's got a seventh one. We're only halfway through. I'm sorry, but it's just.

[Eddie]

It just gets.

[Chrissy]

It's so funny.

[Frankie]

I feel bad for people that believe it, though.

[Chrissy]

Baby there have got to say baby, like you're my wife. I'm sorry about that. That was so rude.

[Frankie]

You're cheating on Astrid.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. And you're cheating on Jeff.

[Eddie]

We've been busted.

[Chrissy]

We've been having an affair. This whole front of everybody, this whole time, they thought we were doing a podcast.

[Frank Bernardo]

Her routine in the gym because she wants to impress somebody outside that gy. Therefore, she's not going to care what she looks like at the gym. She's still up in her routine. Why? Because she's trying to impress somebody else. That's what women do. All of a sudden, they find a guy. Might be a younger guy. Oh, my God. I'm a little bit overweight. They're gonna get in there and they're gonna. They're gonna pound it.

[Eddie]

They're gonna found it.

[Frankie]

They're gonna pound it. It might be a younger guy. I mean, this is this guy's life story.

[Chrissy]

This is literally. This guy is telling you what went.

[Frankie]

What happened?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, this is.

[Frankie]

The wife started cheating on someone, started cheating on him with someone from the gym that was younger and that would get up and he would. She would go to the bathroom and talk to him.

[Chrissy]

You are spot on. This guy is so emotionally immature that the only way that he can deal with the emotions of what happened to him, which is unfortunate. Frank, if your wife really did. Yeah. Sorry about that. But now you're just so angry and bitter about it that the only thing you can do is go on YouTube and make public videos that showcase you and hot young women.

[Frankie]

Welcome.

[Eddie]

Yeah, welcome. Hi.

[Chrissy]

Oh, I was waiting for him to break through a wall. Like the fruit punch guy, the kool aid.

[Eddie]

Kool aid to the brick wall.

[Frank Bernardo]

You're gonna want to look their very best. Pay attention to that sign, gentlemen. Tip number 40.

[Frankie]

If your wife is pretty.

[Frank Bernardo]

That's a mess.

[Chrissy]

That's a bad sign.

[Frankie]

It's terrible.

[Chrissy]

And when you say pay attention, gentlemen, it sounds like. Frank, you. There's nothing you haven't paid attention to. I mean, being with you must be like 24 hour a day school monitoring or something.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

If you. If she takes off her ankle. Ankle monitor without giving.

[Eddie]

Without giving you notice, you're in trouble.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Wife might be cheating on you, so all of a sudden, she's not telling you what's going on in her life. There's a disconnection. You know, a woman who is cheating subconsciously, they disconnect from you. They're worried about the other person. You're the last thing on their mind. So if you feel that disconnection, chances are, gentlemen, her mind's on someone else.

[Chrissy]

Number five, if you feel a disconnection from your wife, you have bigger problems.

[Frankie]

I would feel a disconnection from Frank if I was married to him.

[Eddie]

I feel a disconnection from Frank and.

[Chrissy]

I'm just, yeah, I'm just a guy listening on his, on his YouTube channel.

[Frankie]

Feel disconnected from him.

[Chrissy]

But I want you to hear. So this is. I, I leave, I've left this whole thing intact basically. So I want you to listen because there's a reason. He just said if a woman stops paying attention to you, then you're in real trouble. But listen to, we'll listen to a future point and see how. Why Frank is contradicting himself all through.

[Frank Bernardo]

This video that your wife is cheating on you. All of a sudden she's dressing a lot nicer. I don't care if it's for work again, the gym or going out with friends. Before it used to be very casual.

[Frankie]

Again, the gym.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, again the gym. So, so we know that his wife met her mistress Mr. At the gym or mistress. Could have been a mistress. You never know. Yeah, Frank is really, he's sore. Maybe the woman just wants, has some self respect.

[Eddie]

Like maybe she just wants to dress up nice.

[Chrissy]

Did you ever think about that? No, Frank didn't think about that because Frank has an emotional block right in his head. It's like a two ton barbell sticking.

[Eddie]

Sticking through Frank's spinal cord.

[Chrissy]

He's Abdullah, mumbla, blah blah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Casual outfit, conservative top, nothing, nothing crazy. All of a sudden, guys, all of.

[Eddie]

A sudden her tits are hanging out. She's got cleavage, she's got nipple rings.

[Frankie]

It's summer.

[Chrissy]

She's wearing bad chest.

[Frankie]

She's not wearing her overall prison uniform.

[Eddie]

She's got a thong bikini that she wears to pick up the kids from school.

[Frankie]

Yep, that's the sign.

[Frank Bernardo]

We got some heels, some hot slacks, maybe a nice hot little cleavage. Well, guess what guys? Is that for you? Hell no. She's trying to impress someone else. Tip number six, that your wife might be cheating on you. All of a sudden she's mis. Generous. You're getting some home cooked dinners, you're getting random gifts.

[Eddie]

You're getting blow jobs at the dinner table.

[Frankie]

The mashed potatoes.

[Eddie]

You're getting mashed potatoes left and right. You're getting a pinky in the asshole.

[Frankie]

That makes no sense.

[Eddie]

That makes no sense.

[Chrissy]

Frank, you just said that if she stops paying attention to you, if you feel disconnected, that's a sign. But now the sign is if she's paying attention to you.

[Frankie]

Home cooking.

[Chrissy]

That's right. You know, right before Frank's ex, one of Frank's ex wives delivered Him. I feel like this probably happened multiple times to Frank, actually. I feel like Frank is like a six wife kind of guy, and they get younger each time he gets married. Like, right? Yeah, right. Similar to Larry King. Had nine wives. That's crazy. Nine lives. And nine lives. I feel like right before she handed him the divorce papers, she gave him a blowjob with a pinky in the ass. And he was like, wow.

[Eddie]

Never had that before.

[Frankie]

That's great. Yeah.

[Eddie]

By the way, why are you going to the gym so much? I noticed your phone was on silent.

[Frankie]

You got those hot slacks on. Yeah, I've been saying you wear those hot slacks.

[Chrissy]

I can see Frank's head just, like, struggling to figure out what's going on, you know?

[Eddie]

You were cheating on me. Really? All those silent messages. All that time at the gym, all the. All the nipples showing, outfits you wore, all those times you went out with your friends and you forgot.

[Frankie]

Silence.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God, Frank, you're getting special.

[Frank Bernardo]

Treatment, and you haven't even argued. Well, why is that?

[Eddie]

And you haven't even argued.

[Frankie]

Oh, my God, this guy.

[Eddie]

Living with this guy must be like a.

[Chrissy]

Just a roller coaster.

[Frankie]

Ask you, where did he. Does he profess to have any kind of degree or.

[Chrissy]

Oh, no, no, no. Not that I saw.

[Frankie]

Just the experience.

[Chrissy]

I'm only a couple of episode episodes. There's episodes. I'm only a couple episodes into. Frank, like, Frank has 75 videos.

[Frankie]

Oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

And so there's so much more to dig in here. And so I have a feeling that in season two, we're at least three Frank episodes. Yeah, like, I'm putting it on the calendar. We got to be three Frank episodes. Whether that be a Patreon episode, a regular episode, whatever. This is just classic, classic Frank. This is like classic douchebaggery. This is the definition of a fucking lug nut.

[Frankie]

Why does he have so many videos? And why does he think he's.

[Chrissy]

Because he's talking about fashion and dining and, you know, grooming. He literally talks about grooming like he cuts his own hair. I mean, it's just. Okay, let's continue with this, and we'll get to more Frank videos at a different time. Gentlemen.

[Frank Bernardo]

She's guilty. She feels guilty, and she psychologically needs to make this up to you. So this makes them feel better by doing things for you. Tell.

[Chrissy]

I have a feeling, Frank, that whoever cheated on you had no. They had no urge to feel better about themselves. They were probably like, you're getting what you deserve, you chauvinistic fuck. Twa.

[Frankie]

I mean, he's on the YouTube doing videos all day.

[Chrissy]

Well, he's doing that to get back.

[Eddie]

Women have cheated on him to show them that he's doing fine. Hi, I'm Frank.

[Frankie]

Welcome, welcome.

[Eddie]

I feel great about myself. Welcome, welcome.

[Frankie]

Do you have low T?

[Eddie]

Do you have low T? Are you suffering from erectile dysfunction? Try out the Pravacur 3000 penis bump. This video is sponsored by Pravacur O' Hare Jackrabbit Vibrating cock ring with extender. With the extender. I love it.

[Frank Bernardo]

She's all of a sudden doing all this stuff for you. Pay attention because that's a backdoor cheat sign. Tip number seven, that your wife is cheating on you. And guys, this is is obvious as hell, but we're going to talk about it anyway. If she's upped her going out game, whether it's with friends or at work, all right, that's a huge.

[Eddie]

If your wife gets friends, you're if.

[Frankie]

You'Re in trouble, she's going to work every day. Boom.

[Chrissy]

I have a hard time believing that Frank ever let his wife out of the house for work. Yeah, yeah, sure.

[Eddie]

You can have a job.

[Chrissy]

Honey, polish my balls.

[Eddie]

Polish my balls.

[Chrissy]

You make this rather snappy, won't you? I have some very heavy thinking to do before 10:00.

[Rachel]

Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here. Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-4333. TCB. That's 212-433-3388. 22. Feel free to call and yell all you want. Tell Brian I need a raise. Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans or tell us a little story. The juicier the better. By the way, we love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves. Also give us a follow on your favorite socials at the commercial break on Insta TCB podcast on TikTok. And for those of you who like to watch that came out wrong. We put all the episodes out on video, YouTube.com thecommercialbreak and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show, your free sticker, or just to see how pretty we look. Okay, I gotta go now. I've got a date with my dog. No, seriously, Axel needs food. Today is pork chop day.

[Thumbtack]

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[Brian]

There cats and kittens. I want to tell you about a podcast from Headgum I think you're going to like. It's Handsome with Tig Notaro, Fortune Femster and May Martin. Two of those people have appeared here on the commercial break. The third is conspicuously absent and I will be following up. Every week the Handsome hosts field a question from a friend and attempt to answer it together, covering every subject you could think of, from psychic experiences and reoccurring dreams to secret talents and favorite pop divas. Along the way, Tig, Fortune and May tell plenty of stories and just generally have a ridiculous time. Sound familiar? Both Chrissy and I listen to this show and exactly like the commercial break, they get questions from people like Jennifer Aniston, Paul Simon, Conan O' Brien, Tom Hanks, Shirley Ralph, Melissa McCarthy and other notable listeners. Just like the commercial break does. Handsome is a great podcast with two of the three hosts being some of our favorite guests and I will work on May Martin. Subscribe to Handsome wherever you listen to podcasts and check out the full episodes on YouTube. New episodes drop every Tuesday and Friday. Headgum.com handsome for a full episode list.

[Eddie]

Avoiding your unfinished home projects because you're not sure where to start.

[Thumbtack]

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[Eddie]

Don't know the difference between matte, paint, finish and satin or what that clunking.

[Chrissy]

Sound from your dryer is. With Thumbtack, you don't have to be a home pro, you just have to hire one.

[Thumbtack]

You can hire top rated pros, see price estimates and read reviews all on the app. Download today.

[Frank Bernardo]

Huge red flag that is the number one single biggest red flag is more going out time. They could come up with excuses that they have work related duties to do after work. But if she's never done them and all of a sudden she's required to be there, I would definitely change. Her friends want to see her more.

[Eddie]

All of a sudden she's making her own money. You're fucked.

[Frankie]

Yeah, she's got friends from the gym.

[Chrissy]

She's got friends from the gym and from life and school. Friends.

[Eddie]

If you allow her to have friends, you're screwed. Bury her back in her hole in the backyard. Make sure the ankle monitor has extra batteries. God. Charge that ankle monitor while she's in bed. Double check the gps. Make sure it's working. Backup generator on the ankle monitor. Tie a backup generator to the ankle monitor. You could get ghost. Get ghost. It's like get lost, but get ghost. That's the new. That's our new term. We'll say get lost, and somebody will be like, get ghost. That means take me off your Facebook page forever. If you're married and your wife takes you off her Facebook page and blocks you, you're probably getting cheated.

[Frankie]

Why blocks you on Facebook?

[Eddie]

She doesn't want to wear the handcuffs out to the grocery store.

[Frankie]

Goes to the gym and has friends.

[Eddie]

Yeah. You're up, man.

[Frank Bernardo]

Deciding to go out. It doesn't happen. Guys that. They just like you doing that. You know, we can't do that as men because women are going to pick up on that, you know, 1, 2, 3, agree. But they think we're stupid. Okay. Use the same psychology they use on us back in them.

[Eddie]

What in the good is he talking?

[Frankie]

I don't know. I just tried to block it out. No, I tried to. To follow him.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Honey, Give me a kiss.

[Eddie]

Sure.

[Frank Bernardo]

I'm giving kiss. She wanted to smell if I had alcohol on my breath or if I had any type of.

[Eddie]

On my breast. If I had crackle around my breath.

[Frankie]

If his wife is asking him if he has alcohol, his brother wanting to smell his breath, he. He's had a problem before.

[Chrissy]

He's had this problem.

[Frankie]

Something has happened.

[Eddie]

It's been sober five years. Five years after I. My fifth divorce. I learned my lesson after my 12th DUI. Yeah.

[Frankie]

That's not the first thing you go to.

[Chrissy]

No. No, it's not.

[Frankie]

No. If there hasn't been an issue in the past.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. And listen, if you. If you need to come home without alcohol in your breath, because that's a.

[Eddie]

Demand of your wife, you got bigger problems than whether or not she's cheating on you. You got to go to rehab, dude.

[Chrissy]

It just makes no sense.

[Eddie]

This is not adding up, Frank. You're telling your life story.

[Frankie]

She's made a home cooked dinner for you.

[Eddie]

She's giving you a blowjob.

[Frankie]

She needs to smell your breath.

[Chrissy]

She needs to smell your breath first. Frank, you're telling your story in a top 10 list.

[Eddie]

And it's so transparent. So transparent, man.

[Frank Bernardo]

You do the same thing to them. See if they get nervous, see if they're giving you resistance. Okay, check out their.

[Eddie]

See if they're giving you resistance. This is 2021. Where are we living in Iran? See if they give you resistance. If they give you a resistance. Hit him over the head with a hand.

[Frankie]

God. Whoa.

[Eddie]

Clean up the evidence. Call the state police, tell them it was an accident.

[Frank Bernardo]

Demeanor. You're gonna pick up right away.

[Eddie]

Right away.

[Frank Bernardo]

Conclude today's video.

[Chrissy]

Oh, thank God.

[Eddie]

I don't know how much more I can take. Frank.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God, dude. That's the creepiest, creepiest, creepiest thing. I mean, listen, it's great entertainment. You got to hit. Here it is. Frank Bernardo, for those of you that don't know, is an expert in all things over 50. He's an all things over 50 kind of guy. He's going to tell you about grooming, style, the gym. Women love low T, high T, under T, estrogen. Frank has lived a life, and Frank wants to share those experiences with Everybody, with all 1200 of his subscribers. And so he puts out these videos on a regular basis. And I just find them to be the funniest thing I've ever seen. Not because I don't believe that men over 50 should live and live a life. I mean, I'm. I'm right around the corner, right? I'm.

[Frankie]

Before I know, it's that he's the man to tell them how to do it.

[Chrissy]

He's the man to tell him how to do it. And with horrible advice to Booth. You ready? Let's get into this video. We're going to talk about dating in your 50s. Ready?

[Brian]

Here we go.

[Frank Bernardo]

Gentlemen, in today's video, we're going to talk about dating over the age of 50. Let me ask you a question. How many guys out there between the ages of 50 and 60 are hitting the dating scene again? I know. At this time of our life.

[Eddie]

I know. At this time of our lives.

[Frankie]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Eddie]

It's as if we're dead.

[Frank Bernardo]

Hey, man, don't feel bad. There's millions and millions of men our age out there that are hitting the dating scene.

[Chrissy]

Frank has done research himself, and he knows that there's millions and millions of men over 50 that are hitting the dating scene right now as we speak.

[Frank Bernardo]

Nothing to be ashamed of. But let me ask you a question. Are you prepared to date? Do you remember how to date?

[Eddie]

Does your dick still work?

[Chrissy]

Do you remember how to date? I mean, I get it. I get the premise of the question.

[Frankie]

Yeah, yeah.

[Eddie]

But are you prepared? Like what, you gotta get a kit together or something. Pack a back. Make sure you get a lunchbox. Get a lunchbox. Get a backpack. Get ready for dating. Get a prescription.

[Frankie]

Back to dating time.

[Chrissy]

Back to dating.

[Eddie]

Here we go.

[Frank Bernardo]

Do you remember how to look? Do you remember how to.

[Chrissy]

How to look? I mean, unless you're blind, I'm sure you remember how to look, right?

[Eddie]

Is that how it works?

[Frank Bernardo]

Dress. How's your grooming?

[Eddie]

Have you. How do you smell?

[Frankie]

I mean, it's a whole thing that he's. Checklist.

[Eddie]

You smell like a horse's. Horse's throat.

[Frankie]

Don't do that.

[Frank Bernardo]

You've been taking care of your body. Are you in shape? Are you ready to make a great first impression?

[Eddie]

Are you ready to make great first love? I'm here to show you how. Do you remember the mating ritual?

[Frankie]

Quick, get in shape and shave.

[Chrissy]

Get in shape. Shave your body. Yeah, that's right. Get your Viagra. Get your nose hairs.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Get a lunchbox together.

[Chrissy]

Sounds like Frank is gonna climb Mount Everest, not go on a date.

[Frank Bernardo]

Well, guys, if you.

[Chrissy]

But by the way, if the intended purpose is to make people relax about going back out into the dating scene. Frank, you're doing the exact opposite. You're making people scared of going in the dating scene.

[Frankie]

I don't remember how to look.

[Chrissy]

I don't remember how to look.

[Frankie]

I'm not ashamed.

[Eddie]

I haven't put deodorant on since 1983. I don't even know what a boner isn't.

[Frankie]

Living in a cage.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. What do women look like?

[Eddie]

A vagina. What's that? You mean their flower?

[Frankie]

Women are showing things above their ankles.

[Chrissy]

Well.

[Eddie]

That'S amazing.

[Frank Bernardo]

You're not doing all the above then. You're already behind the eight ball, remember?

[Chrissy]

Sounds like Frank knows what an eight ball is. If I'm just being honest about it.

[Frank Bernardo]

Women you're seeking at this age, it's not their first rodeo, their expectations, they're through the ceiling. They're all looking for their dream man. The last man, the man to finish out their life with.

[Eddie]

What are you talking about, Frank? They're ready to die.

[Frankie]

Would die with a man.

[Eddie]

They're looking for someone to come to their funeral. They're looking to go casket shopping with you. They're looking for you to pay for the retirement village.

[Chrissy]

The Frank, come on, give somebody some hope, man.

[Frank Bernardo]

Here's another big pitfall that you're going to run into if you do get on the dating scene. What are you looking for?

[Chrissy]

Probably a woman, my guess. Yeah. Or a man.

[Frank Bernardo]

You're looking for a younger woman, right?

[Chrissy]

Okay, here we go.

[Eddie]

Ready?

[Chrissy]

Now Frank automatically starts going off the charts. Now I want to tell. I want to preface this by saying I've seen this video a couple times. Frank is going to start talking about a younger woman in the. By saying that if you're looking, if you're 60 and you're looking for a woman in their 50s. But we all know what Frank means. Frank means if you're 50 and you're looking for a 22 year old. Yeah, right. Because if you watch his videos, that's all he hangs around is like, you know, girls in their 20s and 30s. So Frank is trying not to be creepy, but trust me, there's, there's a creep factor here.

[Frank Bernardo]

Come on, we're human in this video.

[Eddie]

Come on.

[Frankie]

He says human.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, human. He also said asham of. There's no Ed on the end. It's like a shame of. Don't be ashamed of. So Frank goes, come on, you know.

[Eddie]

We'Re all looking for younger women. Come on, we're human. Come on, we're pedophiles. I mean, what the.

[Chrissy]

Frank, I get it. I understand, right? We're all looking for. We're all looking for the younger model right when we get. When we're single. But it just starts to sound a little creepy when you put it like that.

[Eddie]

Come on, we're human.

[Chrissy]

Or ooman. Think that guy from the Oatley commercial.

[Eddie]

It's like milk but for oomans.

[Frank Bernardo]

I'm going to show you just how hard it is to get the younger woman in this video. I'm going to set your expectations to where they should be in this video.

[Chrissy]

There's a couple things about a YouTube video that you should know. These type of YouTube videos where you're giving information like this, you have to set up. First of all, you should make your, your intro much shorter than this. I mean, he's been already talking for two minutes and we don't, we haven't even started the video yet. Second of all, you set expectations about what you're going to deliver during the video, right? Like we set expectations that we're going to deliver nothing. So everybody is clear that if nothing Comes out of it correct. But Frank is now setting the expectation. He's going to show you, you know, how to date, how to groom, how to do all this. I promise you, in the next day, six minutes of this video, Frank is going to show you none of that. He's just going to start talking and go down a rabbit hole. So just get prepared.

[Frank Bernardo]

I'm going to teach you how you get dates and how you won't be disappointed chasing the younger girls. Don't miss it.

[Chrissy]

Okay, now here's Frank's theme song, which is like.

[Frankie]

Oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, if you could just see the beginning of it. I mean, I'm gonna put it right up here in a little box right here. So if you're seeing this little box right here, go to YouTube. What's that?

[Frankie]

Is it metal?

[Chrissy]

It's metal, but it's more like Foo Fighters type bullshit, right? But it's not Foo Fighters, I can guarantee.

[Frankie]

I don't know if you wanna date.

[Eddie]

When you're 50 years old. Yeah, Frank's gonna show you how. If he wants a tits right in your face.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, Frank's gonna show you how.

[Eddie]

No erection. No problem. Frank's gonn.

[Chrissy]

I mean, this is something straight out of 2001, right?

[Eddie]

This is Limp Bizkit type. What are you waiting for?

[Brian]

Get out there and live your life.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Get to the bars. Hit on younger, attractive waitresses.

[Brian]

It'll never fail.

[Frankie]

Follow these.

[Eddie]

You'll never fail.

[Frankie]

If you're never gonna tell you.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Eddie]

I can't tell you because I have the inability.

[Frankie]

You'll have to buy my kit.

[Eddie]

That's. I practiced this video seven times in front of the mirror. Still don't know what the I'm talking about. Just angry. My wife left me for the pool boy.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God, such bad music. So bad. What's going on, everybody?

[Eddie]

Wow. I got scared last night when I was listening on the headphones. I was like, whoa, don't yell at me, Frank. Because he's like.

[Chrissy]

He's got this little opening and then he comes right at you and his face is like, what's up, everybody?

[Frank Bernardo]

Welcome to the video. If this is your first time here, my name is Frank Bernardo. This channel is geared.

[Chrissy]

Okay, Frank, you already said welcome to the video a couple times earlier. And I know that, you know, you. You're just trying to put it all together. And I've done the same thing. I'm guilty of it, right? Saying welcome and hello a couple different times. But you don't need to welcome people to the video when they're three and.

[Eddie]

A half minutes in.

[Chrissy]

Frank, don't do that.

[Frankie]

Everybody got distracted.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, call me Frank. I'll consult with you. I'd love to have you on the show, actually, if you somehow have seen this video, I'd love to have you on the show at the commercial break on Instagram. Hit me up under you.

[Frank Bernardo]

All guys out there, 50 and above, who want to up their game, look.

[Chrissy]

And feel better, who want to up.

[Frank Bernardo]

Their cock about themselves in grooming, fitness, fashion and lifestyle.

[Chrissy]

Grooming, fitness, fashion and lifestyle.

[Frank Bernardo]

Yeah, guys, before we get into this video, you know the drill.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God, Frank, we're art. Like we're six and a half minutes in. Can we already get to the video? He's made us a promise.

[Frankie]

We're getting to the drill.

[Chrissy]

We don't know the drill because Frank just keeps on saying, we're getting to the drill. Like we.

[Eddie]

Let's get started. Let's get started. Let's get started.

[Frankie]

You know the drill.

[Eddie]

You know the drill. No, I don't know the drill.

[Chrissy]

I don't know. You haven't told me. Come on, get to it.

[Frank Bernardo]

If you found this information useful, give it a thumbs up. Subscribe so you don't miss more videos on my series of dating over 50. So, gentlemen, I just wanted to put together a quick hit video for you just so I could save you lots.

[Chrissy]

Frank, if.

[Eddie]

A quick hit video that's already six and a half minutes in.

[Chrissy]

You've welcomed us four times. You promised us what you're going to tell us. You've told us what the story is. You've told us to subscribe to your channel. Now let's get to the content. Come on, Frank. What I want, I'm so interested out of men under 50, over 50. Get that 20 year old woman. They're looking for time.

[Frank Bernardo]

A lot of aggravation, a lot of embarrassment and to save you a lot of humiliation because these are all.

[Eddie]

I'm going to save you humiliation by doing it for you. I'm going to be humiliated for you.

[Frank Bernardo]

All the things that you're going to incur, you know, when you're looking for a younger woman. So let's set some parameters right here. When I say younger woman, let's. Let's go realistically here. Ten years younger, that a good number.

[Chrissy]

Frank, we know what number you're really talking about. It's 30 years younger. Yeah. No man in his 50s or 60s who's like Frank is sitting there going.

[Frankie]

Who'S subscribed to this?

[Chrissy]

Who Subscribed to this channel.

[Eddie]

That's right. Good one, Chris.

[Chrissy]

High five. All right. I'd like that. Yeah. Catch us on YouTube to catch that. High five on YouTube.

[Frankie]

Welcome to the video.

[Chrissy]

Welcome to the video. Welcome to the car. It's like a Dr. Phil show.

[Eddie]

It's just.

[Chrissy]

He just keeps going to break. Never get to the point. You're right. People who have subscribed to this video, I can guarantee you, when you say younger woman, what is in their head is not somebody in their 50s. It is somebody in their 20s or maybe 30s. Maybe 30s.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Let's say you're a man, 60, so you're looking for a 50 year old.

[Chrissy]

Come on, Frank, don't bullshit us.

[Frank Bernardo]

First and foremost, if you can get a girl 10 years younger, God bless you, you're doing quite well. If you can get a girl five years younger, you're doing quite well. All right, so you're going.

[Eddie]

If you can get a girl 40 years younger, you're doing awesome.

[Frankie]

There's a gold star.

[Eddie]

Yeah. You're my hero.

[Frank Bernardo]

After that younger woman, how hard is it? How small?

[Chrissy]

I don't know. How hard is it? That's what she said. What's that?

[Frankie]

Why do you have to go?

[Chrissy]

Why do you have to go younger? Why can't you go? Well, he explains later on in the video why you can't go older.

[Frank Bernardo]

Close the window. Can you get her? You can, but it's hard. And this is why it's hard. Let's reverse this. You're on the dating site and let's just say a woman 10 years older than you clicks on your dating site and she says, you know what? I find you interesting. I find you sexy.

[Eddie]

How do you feel? What? She says, I find you interesting.

[Chrissy]

I wish that opening line would come my way on when I wasn't dating. I find you interesting and sexy about that.

[Frank Bernardo]

How do you feel about a woman 10 years older than you looking at.

[Eddie]

You, coming after you, that she's close to the grave? I don't have anything to do with her. I'm not going casket shopping with that old witch.

[Frankie]

Subscribe to this video and you can get any woman. We're talking any age. You're doing well.

[Chrissy]

If you get something with a vagina, I consider that in the plus section. Yeah, but hey, or a penis. Who knows? Who knows what? Oh, yeah, listen, I think this advice pretty much this, this kind of advice, this kind of clarity from a man with such wisdom transcends sexual preference. It doesn't matter. Transgender, you know, gay, straight, whatever.

[Eddie]

It is.

[Chrissy]

Frank's advice is stuff you can take.

[Eddie]

To the bank, you can consider it gold.

[Chrissy]

You.

[Frank Bernardo]

You get it? What's your thought process? Are you going to respond to her? Are you going to say, fuck no.

[Eddie]

No, you old hag.

[Chrissy]

If some woman texted me and said, I find you interesting and sexy, and I went, fuck no.

[Eddie]

What if I could see Frank at.

[Chrissy]

The bar, like at the bar, and he's got, you know, these 20 year old waitresses just basically taking his money right out of his hand, you know, tipping them $100 at a time.

[Eddie]

Because that's who Frank is. And that's how I get younger women, right?

[Chrissy]

And then some old lady comes up and goes, wow, Frank, I've been watching. I find you sexy and interesting.

[Eddie]

No, get out of here. Get out of here. The old hag. Who do you think I am? I'm Frank Bernardo. Have you seen my YouTube channel? I have 600 subscribers and 400 videos, all highly produced. I spend 10 grand a piece on those videos to get a camera crew. And every.

[Frankie]

I bet I cover band from the Foo Fighters.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, and the COVID band. Yeah, that's right. And the Foo Fighters look alike band. I wonder. I wonder how he licensed that music. Like, you know, YouTube's very strict about that stuff. I wonder what song that actually is. I'll look into that.

[Frankie]

It could have been crazy. I'll find you the answer for Frank.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I guess it could.

[Eddie]

Like an out of work band from the 2000s.

[Chrissy]

And Frank's like, can you guys get.

[Eddie]

Back together and do that one hit? That was awesome. I want that to be my theme.

[Chrissy]

Song because Frank was 30 back then.

[Eddie]

She's too old.

[Frank Bernardo]

I don't want anything to do with that.

[Eddie]

I didn't want anything to do with that dried up vagina. What do you got going on in there? Cobwebs.

[Chrissy]

Gross.

[Eddie]

I want to get with his hot tail right here.

[Frank Bernardo]

That's probably the response you're gonna do, right? A 70 year old coming after you. And you're 60. I don't want anything to do with that.

[Eddie]

Geez. Okay, Frank, we get the point. God damn. Make everyone feel warm and fuzzy. I mean, please, Frank, you're not dead. You're 70.

[Chrissy]

Fucking Christ.

[Eddie]

What dating advice do you give to Those who are 70? Yeah, you're dead. Don't bother.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God. I. I think that probably half of the 1200 subscribers are doing exactly what we're doing.

[Frankie]

What we're doing.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I would imagine there's many other podcasts. Yeah, it's just Too good. It's too good. He's setting up jokes every five seconds and you just can't help.

[Frank Bernardo]

And you get that. What do you think that woman 50 year old is thinking when you click on her dating site that you like or that you find her interesting? What do you think she's saying.

[Eddie]

Frank?

[Chrissy]

What she's thinking is, oh, my God, a man my age is actually not.

[Eddie]

Looking at 20 year olds. He wants to have.

[Frankie]

Yes, a meaningful relationship. Possibly. But here's something that I would suggest to Frank even before we get to the profile. Clicking on that's. How do you set up a profile? I mean, if you're of a certain age.

[Eddie]

Yeah, how?

[Frankie]

I mean, that would have been helpful to have maybe a little tutorial on that.

[Chrissy]

You know what? I think you and I should do a show where we combat some of Frank's bullshit. Yes.

[Brian]

Right.

[Chrissy]

We should do a seven signs of a healthy relationship that you're not being cheated on. And then you know how to date in your, you know, whatever, 30s or 40s. Listen, here's the point. Frank is like, Frank has made us a bunch of promises at the beginning of this video. We're already, we're already seven minutes, six or seven minutes into this, and he has yet to talk about any of them. All he's doing is giving his opinion about what would happen if a 70 year old decided to click on his profile. Not your profile, his profile. Because one thing Frank is, is very transparent. If Frank is saying it, it means he feels it.

[Eddie]

Right?

[Chrissy]

Not that the whole world feels it, but that he feels it.

[Frankie]

Okay.

[Frank Bernardo]

You think she's calling up her girlfriends?

[Eddie]

Oh, Allison, guess what?

[Frank Bernardo]

I have a 16 year old after me.

[Eddie]

Do you think a 20 year old is doing that? Guess what? I got this old hags giving me $100 of pop every time he comes to the bar.

[Frankie]

Exactly.

[Chrissy]

You know that guy with the greasy.

[Eddie]

Hair and, and he's wearing, says he.

[Frankie]

Knows Foo Fighter 2.

[Eddie]

He's wearing the Tommy John jeans. He's got that band that follows him around playing music all the time. I bet Frank just has a band behind him. Like the mariachi band, but like the old Foo Fighters.

[Chrissy]

Like the COVID band.

[Eddie]

I want to get it. Come over.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Hey, guys, can you play my theme song real quick? There's a hot girl over there. I'm going to walk into the room with my tight jeans and my, my muscle shirt, my hair slicked back. I'm wearing Drakkar.

[Chrissy]

Oh.

[Eddie]

Remembered your car.

[Frankie]

I did.

[Chrissy]

What a scourge on the earth. Yeah.

[Eddie]

I don't even think it exists anymore.

[Chrissy]

It must. There must be somebody with an old bottle of your car. If you've got a bottle of Drakkar.

[Eddie]

Can you please send it to me? I'd like to remember how it smells.

[Chrissy]

Because I remember that my friend got his. Like I was 12 or 13 years old and my friend Philip got a bottle of Drakkar from his parents. But I didn't wear cologne because my parents didn't give us cologne. Right. And that's not. We couldn't. It's just that we didn't.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

And like we sprayed that shit on us as if like.

[Frankie]

I remember young guys doing that around the age of.

[Eddie]

That's right.

[Chrissy]

We thought that it was like a light for insects. Like it was a magnet.

[Eddie]

Really. What it really was was a force field against getting laid.

[Frankie]

Exactly. It's like, whoa, that is really strong. You stay over there and I'll talk.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, that smells like donkey pits. What is that?

[Eddie]

Did you rub bear shit on yourself? Because I don't know, it smells a little weird. That's Dracarna, Oregon.

[Chrissy]

I never even know how to say it.

[Eddie]

The car, new air.

[Frank Bernardo]

I can't believe it. It's my lucky day. I got a 60 year old jumping for joy. She's calling family members. I really think that that's happening. Do you really think that she's getting excited? No, but if you are a good looking man.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God.

[Frankie]

Why are you throwing in the family members? He's calling family members.

[Chrissy]

Frank's just like over exaggerating to make a point here. But the truth is is it doesn't matter what age you are and what age you're going after if you're someone you're excited about.

[Frankie]

Exactly.

[Chrissy]

Doesn't matter how old they are.

[Frankie]

Interesting. Sexy. Sounds like a good starting point.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, absolutely. I agree with you 100%.

[Frank Bernardo]

That takes care of himself. You might get a response. But how many guys our age looked apart are in shape? You better be spot on to even.

[Eddie]

Gross.

[Chrissy]

This is all gross. It's also gross.

[Eddie]

You better be spot on. You better have a rock hard penis the second you walk in the door.

[Frankie]

Muscle shirt.

[Eddie]

That's right. Absolutely.

[Chrissy]

Holy.

[Eddie]

You do your testosterone regimen?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Double up on your testosterone regimen. Take two Viagra.

[Frankie]

That's spot on.

[Chrissy]

That's spot on. Yep.

[Eddie]

You better have it. You better shave every hair off your body. You better look like a 20 year old porn star when you get into the bedroom so she knows you're rock hard and ready. How excited she's gonna call her friends when she finds out you need a full erection.

[Frankie]

Family.

[Eddie]

He could get a full erection. No penis bump or anything. He's not a cat.

[Frankie]

The only downside is there's a huge grease stain on my pillow.

[Eddie]

Listen, you know, you give a little, you take a. You can't do that, Frank Bernardo, it's against the rules.

[Frankie]

Read the rules.

[Eddie]

Read the rules.

[Frank Bernardo]

Frank, get that woman to respond to you. You know what I like to compare this to? How many you gentlemen out there have a business did you ever send out?

[Chrissy]

Oh my. We still haven't answered one question. He still hasn't answered one question about how you prepare yourself. He said you better be spot on. What exactly does that mean? You told him to get in shape. What do you expect? Everyone's just going to get up and start lifting weights.

[Eddie]

They don't have a life, they're just kids.

[Chrissy]

They're gonna start spending all day at.

[Eddie]

The gym, at the hairstylist, making videos.

[Chrissy]

About my ex wife cheating on me.

[Eddie]

I mean, like, come on, Frank.

[Frank Bernardo]

Mailers. Let's just say you sent out a hundred mailers if you get one.

[Eddie]

Mailers. I send out mailers. What are you talking about? What kind of business do you own?

[Frankie]

Lawn care?

[Eddie]

A pizza.

[Chrissy]

Pizza place.

[Eddie]

A Domino's?

[Frankie]

Yeah, mailers only work very, very strategically these days.

[Eddie]

You put a picture of Frank Bernardo on there naked.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

You're gonna get everyone to open up to see what that. What's in that package.

[Frankie]

Look who's mailing me.

[Eddie]

Yeah, it's Frank Fernando with the erection.

[Frank Bernardo]

On response. Out of a hundred mailers. You did real good. That's a law of average. I like to compare this dating stuff to sending out mailer for every hundred girls you click on that are 10 years younger than you. If you get one of those women to respond, you did a good job.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God.

[Frankie]

Got it. But tell us.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, but how do we do it?

[Eddie]

How do we do it? You promised us and guess what?

[Frank Bernardo]

It's just a response. It's not a date. Now you gotta work it and convince them from that point.

[Frankie]

What?

[Frank Bernardo]

What makes you at 60 so different, so special than any 50 year old that they can get?

[Eddie]

What are you talking about?

[Frankie]

You are talking in fucking spiraling.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he's way spiraling. And the part that makes me upset, Frank, is that you probably paid a production company a lot of money to record this video and edit it for you, right? I could be wrong about that. But I'm just assuming the quality of the video. And we have friends that do this. And it's like $10,000 for three videos, right? And so that's 3,000 video. $3,300 a video. And no one has told you that. You're just rambling on and you're not getting to the fucking point, Right?

[Eddie]

You get a response.

[Chrissy]

It's just a response.

[Eddie]

Now you got to work really hard. Now you got to convince them you're not an axe murderer.

[Frankie]

Contact a direct mail.

[Chrissy]

Okay, so tell them how to convince.

[Eddie]

You know, when you send out mailers for dates these days, you get very little response. I don't know what's happening. Back in the 80s, I used to get a ton of pussy just sending out mailers. I'd put a picture in my face and I'd say. I'd say, no, low T here.

[Frankie]

And I just call now.

[Eddie]

Call now. 1-800-Frankie V. You see how hard this is? No, I don't because you're not telling me.

[Frank Bernardo]

You see how the window's real small? What I'd like for you guys to do is.

[Eddie]

Oh, here we go.

[Chrissy]

Okay, an action. Here we go.

[Frankie]

An action something.

[Chrissy]

You ready?

[Frank Bernardo]

I would love for you to set realistic goals.

[Eddie]

Okay, I'm with you. Let's go. Let's set some goals. Okay, here it goes.

[Frank Bernardo]

Realistic expectations.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

Okay. You could start out at 50 on the young side, but maybe go. This is going to sound crazy. Maybe go 50, 60.

[Eddie]

You lost me again.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God, Frank, you just keep.

[Eddie]

On giving the same example we. First of all, we know you're not.

[Chrissy]

Talking about 50 year olds. You're talking about about 20 year olds, first of all.

[Eddie]

Second of all, what is some magic number between 50 and. Why do you keep on saying that.

[Chrissy]

There'S a magic number between 50 and 60? There's a small window. Let's set some goals.

[Eddie]

You're not doing any of it. I haven't learned a. No, I haven't learned a thing.

[Frankie]

Jackie Weaver, he hasn't even told us what brand to use for like a shaving tool.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Frankie]

I mean, just start there, Frank. Give me something.

[Eddie]

Give me something. What kind of. Should I be taking something I can tell my dad she's ready to hook.

[Chrissy]

Her dad up with Frankie B. But Frankie B.

[Eddie]

So far hasn't given us jack shit.

[Chrissy]

Except told us that.

[Eddie]

That if a woman checks her phone at dinner, she's cheating on you. And the 50 year old woman that's getting hit on by a 60 year old is going to call her parents and tell her, hey, Mom, I got a 60 year old on the hook. I can. I can die in peace.

[Frankie]

Yeah, that's great, Jill. He's my forever man.

[Eddie]

That's great, Jill. I wanted for you as a 60 year old man. Now I can die.

[Frankie]

You've done it.

[Rachel]

Okay. You're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at tcb. It's pretty simple. Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute. Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid too? You know you do. Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-4333 TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You can be on the show too. Just call and say something, anything. Or text us and we'll text you right back. Promise. Then head over to tcbpodcast.com and get your free sticker. It's your constitutional right to a sticker. And we must abide. You get the point? Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and watch all the episodes episodes on [e-mail] the commercial break. Best to you and Astrid. Especially Astrid.

[Eddie]

What is dedication? The thing that drives me every day as a dad is Dariana. We call him Dayday for short. Every day he's hungry for something, whether it's attention, affection, knowledge. And there's this huge responsibility in making sure that when he's no longer under my wing that he's a good person.

[Frank Bernardo]

I want him to be able to.

[Eddie]

Sit back one day and go, we worked together. We did a good job.

[Thumbtack]

That's dedication.

[Brian]

Find out [e-mail] brought to you by.

[Eddie]

The US Department of Health and Human Services and the Ad Council. I am so excited for this spa day. Candles lit, music on, hot tub warm and ready.

[Natural Cycles]

And then my chronic hives come back again in the middle of my spa day. What a wet blanket looks like another spell of itchy red skin. If you have chronic spontaneous urticaria or csu, there is a different treatment option.

[Frankie]

Hives during my next spa day.

[Natural Cycles]

Not if I can help it. Learn [e-mail].

[Frank Bernardo]

That opens up a 15 year window. And you find good looking, beautiful women in their 60s. Early 60s. You can. And here, take it from me, you could find women in their 60s that are far better looking and in far better shape than women in their 50s. They're.

[Frankie]

Take it from me.

[Chrissy]

Take it from Frank.

[Eddie]

You could take this advice to the bank. What advice? I don't know, because he hasn't given any. But take it from Frank, there are hot women in their 60s, 70s and 80s. It sounds like a radio station he's giving.

[Chrissy]

There's a radio conference contest.

[Eddie]

Hot women from the 60s, 70s and 80s. We're playing all the hits from yesterday and today on Frankie V. Fashion, lifestyle, grooming, cheating, grooming, dating. Women in their 50s out there.

[Frank Bernardo]

There are women out there that take care of themselves. So open.

[Eddie]

There are women out there that take care of themselves.

[Chrissy]

You don't say you are such a.

[Frank Bernardo]

Chauvinist parameters because you might find the of your dreams in her early 60s.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

You notice how his voice raises the more bullshitty he gets.

[Frankie]

I'm also confused because I feel like in the very beginning he was saying just target the 50 year olds.

[Chrissy]

He did.

[Frankie]

Now he's now open it up.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he said you want to date the younger women because we're just human. That's all we're going to look at is the younger women. Now we're going to open it up now. We're not going to go 10 years, we're going to go 15 years one way or the other. So you can get down to 45 or you can now down to 70.

[Frankie]

Averages his old.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God, Frank, you just dying. You're killing me bud.

[Frank Bernardo]

Hey, that's only two years older than you. Just open up everything and you're going to save yourself.

[Chrissy]

So Frank is basically doing a complicated math problem with women and he's teaching us here online how to do algebra with Matt with women's ages and still I don't know what the answer is.

[Eddie]

Because I never figured out what the question was.

[Frank Bernardo]

A lot of disappointment from not getting a date. And let's just say you are able to land that date. How hard do you think it is to get a second date with a 50 year old?

[Chrissy]

Oh my God, Frank, you just need. You got to give people advice here bud. You got to step in with some actual like advice. You you're assuming that someone can get a first date based on the non information that you've given them so far.

[Frankie]

They've opened their age range.

[Chrissy]

Basically what they have to do is they have to take and make a graph chart, put their age right here.

[Eddie]

And go 15 ways of this. 15 years this way or 15 years that way.

[Chrissy]

That's the advice you given them so far. Frank is a math equation.

[Frank Bernardo]

Again, you better be spot on.

[Eddie]

You. What does that mean? What does it mean to be look the part?

[Frank Bernardo]

Everything has got to work. It's got to be perfect for that woman to jump up to that Level?

[Chrissy]

What level?

[Frankie]

I don't know.

[Eddie]

What are you talking about?

[Chrissy]

What happened?

[Frankie]

Where are we on the ground?

[Eddie]

I bet Frank is like for a woman to jump up on this, you got to be spot on. By level I mean my bald penis that I've been working with the pump every day, raising my tea and raising my pee. You know what I'm saying, Chrissy? That's advice you can take to the bank. There you have it. I. Look how he says it. There you have it. No, there you have nothing, Frank.

[Frank Bernardo]

All right? And a lot of women, you know, a lot of guys think just because they got the money, you know, they start flashing the money. I, I would not go there because there's a lot of women that are, they're on to that game.

[Chrissy]

Oh, they're under the game of a rich guy spreading and showering them with money.

[Eddie]

I'm on to you. You want to take me to the male guys this weekend? I am on to you. No, sir.

[Chrissy]

I'm not going to be tricked by that one again.

[Frankie]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chrissy]

Do you know how many nice gifts good dinners. That's right. I had a man who bought me a yacht once and I will not be fooled again. I will not be gifted one more Mercedes.

[Frankie]

You got me.

[Eddie]

I will not be gifted one more Mercedes.

[Frankie]

That's right.

[Chrissy]

It will not happen. Okay?

[Frank Bernardo]

They're not going to be bought. So I would. There are women out there that will, okay? But the majority of them.

[Eddie]

I'm going to disagree with you, Frank. I'm going to disagree with you, bud.

[Chrissy]

And that works both ways.

[Frank Bernardo]

By the way, your money, when you're. Especially if you do meet a woman 50 years old or, you know, 10 years younger than you, don't start talking about money. Don't start talking about what you got. You're trying to buy them, you're trying to impress them. Let them ask you when they're ready.

[Frankie]

How much money do you make? Right?

[Eddie]

How much money do you have in.

[Chrissy]

Your wallet right now?

[Eddie]

Is this stick up?

[Chrissy]

You thought it was a second date. You were so spot on. I gave you a second date, but now it's just a hold up.

[Eddie]

What the fuck are you talking about, Frank?

[Frankie]

That's really. Dude, right now.

[Chrissy]

You drank too much Red Bull this.

[Eddie]

Morning or whatever it is you do, man. Just.

[Chrissy]

This guy has non linear thought. This is literally word vomit right now.

[Frank Bernardo]

Because what they're gonna do is they're gonna feel you out. They're gonna ask.

[Eddie]

Oh, I bet they're gonna feel you out, Frank. They're gonna feel you right out the door.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

A lot of questions. They're tricky. They're sneaky.

[Eddie]

They're women.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God.

[Frankie]

Whoa.

[Chrissy]

Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank.

[Frankie]

What are they even being sneaky about?

[Eddie]

Frank? They're sneaky. They're. If you're giving them money, they're gonna take it and use it. They're sneaky. They're women. They're gonna ask you questions. Trust me. I know a lot of women and they ask questions.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

When they say.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, when they. Trust me. Watch this. You. They walk in the door for the second date. First, they're gonna ask a question like.

[Eddie]

How is your day? Don't say a word. It's a trap. They know you have money. When they ask you those kind of questions. When you say, my day was great, they're gonna know you're loaded. But they're on to you. They're on to you. They know you're about to give them money.

[Chrissy]

Frank, you're out of control, bud. First of all, I want to say you're kind of cute, Frank, and kind of funny. Until you make comments like, they're women.

[Frankie]

Yeah, they're sneaky. They're women.

[Eddie]

You're a douche. There you go. You're Frank. You're Bernardo.

[Chrissy]

You're a douche.

[Frankie]

Yep.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Come on, Frank. Leave that kind of out of the videos.

[Frank Bernardo]

They're gonna surprise you. Sneak attack.

[Brian]

Meow.

[Frankie]

Bam.

[Eddie]

Bam. They're gonna jump through your window at all hours of the night and day and surprise you with question to give you that money back that you gave them. They're gonna come in with the keys to the Mercedes and go, I'm on to you. You're gonna be like, whoa. Yeah, it didn't work. I was gonna give her that Mercedes. She jumped right in the window. Scared the hell out of me. Sneak attack.

[Frankie]

Sneaky.

[Eddie]

I've had two heart attacks already from women jumping out of the rafters. They just come out of nowhere and ask you a question. Yeah. How was your day?

[Frankie]

But he said, specifically, don't tell them. Let them ask you questions. But then when they ask you questions, was that when you're supposed to back off or.

[Eddie]

I don't know.

[Frankie]

Where are we on the grass?

[Eddie]

I'm having a hard time following Frank here. I don't know.

[Chrissy]

I'm trying to keep up, Frank.

[Eddie]

I really am.

[Frank Bernardo]

This is how they do it. But if you're a guy that presses money, money, money, money, you're gonna be gone. All right?

[Eddie]

Because you're gonna be gone. What?

[Frankie]

Although you said you're gonna be good.

[Eddie]

No, you're gonna be gone. You're gonna be good. No, he said you're gonna be gone, which is the opposite of what's gonna happen.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Come on, Frank. You know, any. Anybody wants to have a partner that's stable and that, I mean, if you.

[Eddie]

Have no money, you're in there, you're.

[Frankie]

One step ahead of the game.

[Eddie]

If you're living in your ex wife's apartment like I am, you're good. But if you got plenty of money, you're fine. If you have a yacht and two cars, women are gonna go, I'm on to you. They're sneaky, they're sneaking.

[Frankie]

They can tell.

[Eddie]

They can tell when you got money. They're gonna leave real quick.

[Frankie]

They're gonna be gone.

[Eddie]

Yeah. You'll never get that second date if they know you have money. So hide it. Dress like a homeless person. But you know, a homeless person that smells good with muscles.

[Frankie]

It makes no sense.

[Eddie]

It makes no sense. I love Frank. These are the best video I could go on all day.

[Frank Bernardo]

I'm trying to buy them and they're going to be on to that. So all I'm trying to say here.

[Eddie]

He's trying to wrap it up.

[Frank Bernardo]

What?

[Eddie]

Yeah, like what are you trying to say? Frank, please give us a clue. Is it.

[Frank Bernardo]

Is. If you open up your parameters, okay, you're gonna get dates. If you pin it to just 10 years younger guys, you're going to be disappointed. You're going to be frustrated.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God.

[Frankie]

So the whole thing, we're at the.

[Chrissy]

End of the date, we're always, we're.

[Eddie]

We're date range and surprise questions and sneak attacks.

[Frankie]

And money.

[Eddie]

And money.

[Frank Bernardo]

Because you're not gonna get a lot of dates. So all I'm trying to do is get you to open up your eyes. Be realistic, okay. Don't be so hell bent on finding someone 10, 12 years younger than you. You might find someone your age, two years younger, two years older. That's going to work. And it's going to be very compatible for you.

[Eddie]

So don't be so hellbent on finding someone your age. Oh, it's your mind straight on.

[Frank Bernardo]

Especially if you're new to the dating scene.

[Chrissy]

All right, Most, trust me. Frank's been on the dating scene for.

[Eddie]

A long time.

[Chrissy]

And there's a reason why.

[Eddie]

Because he hasn't learned a thing.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

When you first get on there, yeah, we're gonna go attack the younger women and you're gonna be dead.

[Eddie]

With your money and your questions.

[Frank Bernardo]

Disappointed. So take it from me, open up your parameters, get some dates and just have fun with it. So, guys, that concludes today's video.

[Eddie]

Oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

Thank God.

[Frankie]

Thanks.

[Eddie]

Thanks for nothing.

[Frankie]

Was that a quick hit?

[Eddie]

Yeah, that was a quick hit video.

[Chrissy]

Just doing a quick kid video. Real quick. Quick.

[Frankie]

Get out your graph paper.

[Eddie]

22 minutes of your time.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Do you have your projector? And I don't mean the kind that actually projects. I mean like the projector for math problems, remember?

[Frankie]

Yes, the circle.

[Eddie]

Yes, the circle. Can you get out your calculus calculator?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, you're gonna need it if you found it informational. Well, I found nothing informational, Frank.

[Eddie]

I found it highly entertaining.

[Chrissy]

It's ready.

[Frank Bernardo]

So, gentlemen, in today's video, we're gonna go over five more sneaky signs that your wife just might be cheating on your ass.

[Eddie]

Gonna fuck your mind.

[Frankie]

What are you waiting for?

[Eddie]

What are you waiting for out there? Get it done.

[Chrissy]

I just imagine that Frank is like. This is his. Like, when his phone goes off in.

[Eddie]

The morning, this is the song that wakes him up. And he's like, what am I waiting for? I gotta go get it done. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna get it done today. I haven't worked in 12 years. I'm gonna go polish. I'm gonna go polish my Corvette again. Outside with my sh.

[Brian]

Oh, God.

[Chrissy]

You just got out of this song.

[Eddie]

What's going on, guys?

[Frankie]

I love it in the last part. He said, cheating on your ass.

[Eddie]

Cheating on your ass.

[Chrissy]

Wait, Frankie. This is so transparent that Frankie has been cheated on in this manner. Anything that Frankie says in any of these videos, I just imagine that Frankie has an ex wife that did exactly what he's saying you should look out for. Because how else would he know this information?

[Eddie]

You know?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, and it's. And it's so specific.

[Eddie]

If she takes out her phone at Ruby Tuesdays on a Thursday night at 7:45pm in booth number three, she's cheating on you. Booth number three in Rossdale, California. If you've got David Thompson, the pool boy, cleaning your pool every Monday and Wednesday and you working, those are your workout times. If she goes to the gym. If she. Remember, that was one, Right. She goes to the gym. Yeah, she goes to the gym. Half the women in America. What are you talking about?

[Frank Bernardo]

If this is your first time here, My name is Frank Bernardo.

[Eddie]

If you're a virgin, call me up.

[Frank Bernardo]

This channel is geared for all.

[Eddie]

I'll be gentle.

[Frank Bernardo]

All guys over the age of 50 who want to up their game, look and feel better about themselves in grooming, fitness, fashion, and lifestyle.

[Eddie]

How many more things can you focus on, Frankie? Like, let's just stick to one Fashion focus. Lifestyle. Photography. Theme parks. Mediterranean cuisine. Ring lights. Cameras. Televisions. Soundproofing. Guitars.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Chairs. I'm just.

[Eddie]

Now I'm just naming things in the studio. Lots of wires. Fire hazards.

[Frankie]

Remember the time the panel came down?

[Eddie]

Yes, I did. Or the fan was falling apart. Screws were falling from the fan. Oh, there's probably that kid who. You guys are dicks. I hope you die in your studio. I hope your fan decapitates you. It's true. My son comes in here and he has a shit fit every single time we come into the studio.

[Chrissy]

It's true. He just can't get. He doesn't.

[Eddie]

The only thing that he wants to do in life is be in the studio with Chrissy and Daddy.

[Frankie]

I know. It's the things you can't have.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Frankie]

That you want the most.

[Eddie]

So we had to lock the door. So we have a little lock at.

[Chrissy]

The top that you slide.

[Eddie]

Right? And my biggest nightmare is that the ceiling fan sets on fire and we can't get out. All the soundproofing goes afloat.

[Brian]

Flame.

[Eddie]

And we get out. It's like a White Snake concert. And then it's being broadcast. DCB episode 3312 the gang dies. You guys are. Oh, it works. Wow. I wanted you guys to die. And it worked.

[Frankie]

It did.

[Chrissy]

He wished it back to Frank.

[Frank Bernardo]

You know, but if you're a gentleman in your 40s, you know, don't turn the video off, you know, because I know.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, Listen, I know that I'm really.

[Eddie]

This content is geared toward people in their 70s, but if you're in your 40s. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on, hold on. I need your subscription. I'm almost there. I'm almost to a thousand. I bet. You know, when the odometer rolls over to 999, I've been there for 12 miles.

[Chrissy]

Don't worry, Frankie.

[Eddie]

So it's the commercial break.

[Frankie]

Exactly.

[Eddie]

We feel your pain.

[Frank Bernardo]

You know, 40 years old, you think you're the men of the world, and you know everything that's going on out there. And nothing could be further from the truth.

[Eddie]

When you're 50, that's when you know everything.

[Frankie]

Way to really. Really?

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Wait. If you're 40. Hold on. I got advice.

[Frankie]

You're an idiot.

[Eddie]

Look at my body. You're the kind of dumbass no one cares about. Excuse me. You're the kind of badass that no one cares. There are two kinds of badasses in the world. Me and the only other kids.

[Frank Bernardo]

So take this information, absorb it, utilize it.

[Eddie]

And what is it? A vitamin. Absorb it. I'm in the Frankie tank. Absorbing the information. It feels so good on my scandal sack. Can I dip my balls in? Isn't that advice?

[Frankie]

It really absorbs better that way.

[Eddie]

Yeah, that's right.

[Frankie]

Gets your blood faster.

[Eddie]

Your test, your tasty testicles, your taste bud, your testicle taste buds.

[Frank Bernardo]

Put it into play because it just might make you a little bit more wiser when you're a guy my age.

[Eddie]

How old is that Frankie you've never stated?

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Is that 50? I'm guessing 65 probably. And he looks good for 65.

[Frankie]

Yeah, no, he does, but I've. That's why he wants people to look.

[Eddie]

At his body, I guess whatever he's drinking like amniotic fluid or something and splashing it on his face every morning. I use pure placenta on my eyes.

[Frank Bernardo]

Gentlemen, so before we get cranking into this video and anytime you like it, anytime you like the information, anytime you think that this information is going to help you catch your cheating dog.

[Eddie]

Oh, I already left wife.

[Frank Bernardo]

Then smash that like button and don't forget.

[Brian]

Oh my God.

[Chrissy]

So Frankie is constantly talking about on other videos that are not as good auditory wise or I would play them, he is always talking about older men trying to be younger. Like he's in Mexico and he's talking about the right length bathing suit, right?

[Eddie]

And he's like, you know, I see these guys wearing them down around their ankles. That's a young guy. You're not a young guy. You know, don't try and be a young guy. And then I see guys are wearing way too short. That's a young guy. Don't try and be a young guy. It's got to be the right length, right? In between. And I'm like, what are you, a Catholic?

[Chrissy]

Enough.

[Eddie]

Done. You like checking girls skirts or something? What do you mean the right length.

[Chrissy]

For us for a bathing suit?

[Eddie]

Who cares, right? He's always talking.

[Frankie]

The bathing suit length isn't gonna be what the turning point is.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I know.

[Chrissy]

Some girl's not gonna sleep with you based on your bathing suit length, I can guarantee you. Right, but because when you get to.

[Eddie]

That age, it's just like, look at.

[Chrissy]

That bathing suit length. But he's always talking about how you shouldn't try and act younger. You should try and act your age. Like be your age and Then what he says is if you, if you smash that like button.

[Eddie]

What are you, 12 playing Fortnite? Smash that like button. Smash your face.

[Frank Bernardo]

Frankie, let's get cranking into this video.

[Eddie]

If you say let's get cranking one.

[Chrissy]

More time, you, you are dating yourself.

[Eddie]

By saying, let's get cranking. Let's get cranking.

[Chrissy]

You know what let's get cranking means?

[Eddie]

Scenes.

[Chrissy]

It's like when they had to crank.

[Eddie]

The cars, they would actually start them for the front.

[Frankie]

Right?

[Frank Bernardo]

Oh, there's a lot of you guys out there that are saying, you know what? My wife ain't cheating on me. Look at this. Look what's going on here. Why would she cheat on me?

[Frankie]

I guarantee you you're not just watching a Frankie Beat video randomly if your wife is not cheating on you.

[Chrissy]

That's right. That's right, Frankie.

[Frankie]

No, what he's saying, look what I've got going on.

[Chrissy]

Look what I've got going on. Look at this package. Look at the full.

[Frankie]

She would never do that.

[Chrissy]

That's right. I get up 13 times a night to pee.

[Eddie]

Got gray hairs on my pubes. I've been going to the tanning bed for 40 years. So my skin is like leather. I've got bulletproof skin. Why would she not want me? I get half an erection. Half an erection is full erection. It only goes to five. It's like that old speaker that's broken. You just need it to turn up a little bit louder. But it never does. It's like my cock.

[Frankie]

Why would she leave that?

[Eddie]

That's right. I've got a penis pump to help me get it there.

[Frank Bernardo]

I don't know. Do you pay attention?

[Eddie]

What was that?

[Frank Bernardo]

Are you affectionate? Are you romantic? Are you giving her what she needs? Financially, sexually? Oh, think about it.

[Eddie]

I will think about it financially. Have you paid for last night?

[Frankie]

Did you pay for last night?

[Eddie]

Your credit's no longer good here, sir. You're four fucks behind on paying us. Oh, Frankie. Financially. What does that mean? What is a woman supposed to leave you the second you can't afford everything?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I guess so.

[Frankie]

I think we're getting into another specific here.

[Eddie]

Frank used to lives with his mom in a one bedroom south side of Chicago. Are you? Are you best to you?

[Frank Bernardo]

What kind of shape are you in?

[Eddie]

Are you pretty bad shape? Things are not going great for me right now, Frankie. It's a really bad situation. I'm in bad shape, man. I'm playing Dungeons and Dragons in my dad's basement.

[Frankie]

Finding your videos?

[Eddie]

Yeah. I've been watching your videos on repeat for three years. Bad shape, Frankie.

[Frank Bernardo]

Taking care of yourself, are you? Making sure you're the best possible you you could be for your wife?

[Chrissy]

What generalized bullshit is this? Are you the best positive. You sound like one of those life coaches on Clubhouse.

[Eddie]

Are you the best you? Did you wake up this morning being the best you you can be? What is the best me I can be?

[Chrissy]

What the does that mean exactly?

[Frankie]

I mean, I get the general premise of it.

[Chrissy]

I do.

[Frankie]

Come on.

[Eddie]

Like you?

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Like, get up, be a good human. Like, you know, smile, let people in. In traffic.

[Chrissy]

I get all that, but what a bunch of generalized. Like, tell me exactly what I need to do to be my best.

[Frankie]

Yeah, we need specifics.

[Chrissy]

And what does it mean if you can't work out? You're not like you women shouldn't be with you.

[Eddie]

I don't get it. It's just like. It's just Frankie.

[Chrissy]

Here you go again, just giving us a bunch of pile on bullshit, you know, a bunch of platitudes that don't mean anything. And I guarantee you're not going to get to a point here.

[Eddie]

Yeah, guarantee you never get to the point.

[Frank Bernardo]

You want her to be that way, right? You want her to look good.

[Frankie]

You want her, but she can't go to the gym.

[Eddie]

Yeah, of course. But I'm the man. But I'm the man. That's the way it's supposed to be. I was built like this. I can't help it that God made me.

[Frankie]

You're being your best self now.

[Eddie]

You're being my best self. I'm being a man. I can't help it that God wants me to be the king of my territory. You're just lucky we're letting you vote.

[Frank Bernardo]

Just nice. You want her to be sexy. You think she doesn't want the same to you guys? Stop being complacent, all right? That's how you get yourself in trouble. Here's the facts.

[Eddie]

Facts. Oh, here he comes with the facts. He's breaking out the Google machine.

[Frankie]

Yep.

[Eddie]

I can guarantee no facts are going to follow.

[Frank Bernardo]

3% of all wives cheat on their men.

[Chrissy]

What was that? 33.

[Eddie]

Okay, 33%. Jeez, Astrid, are you still here? I'm gonna go check her phone immediately.

[Frank Bernardo]

3%. So let's talk about.

[Eddie]

Wait, he said 53.

[Frankie]

53.

[Eddie]

53%.

[Frankie]

I think that's a little high.

[Chrissy]

Okay, now.

[Eddie]

Now you got my attention, Frankie. Okay, now go.

[Chrissy]

Tell me more.

[Frank Bernardo]

If I got you and nine of your buddies together and I interviewed all ten of you guys. And I asked you, do you think your wife is cheating on you? Well, probably. I would say all ten would say no. But guess what? Five of you guys are wrong.

[Chrissy]

Whoa.

[Frank Bernardo]

Facts.

[Frankie]

Lay in the facts.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Where did you get this information from? Does the CDC give this information on their website? Because I don't know. That just seems like a high number.

[Frankie]

It does seem 50.

[Chrissy]

Like 5 out of 10 women cheat on their husbands.

[Frankie]

No.

[Eddie]

Huh.

[Chrissy]

I wonder how many men cheat on their wives. Yeah, that's a good question.

[Eddie]

Question.

[Chrissy]

But he doesn't have those facts readily available.

[Eddie]

That doesn't fit the narrative of this video.

[Frank Bernardo]

No 5 year guys. So room of 10. At least 5 of the wives are cheating on your husbands. Now think about that. Here's a figure. Think about 67% of all guys cheat.

[Chrissy]

67. So 7 out of 10.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Frankie]

Wow.

[Chrissy]

We are a bunch of cheaters.

[Frankie]

I know. And I'm thinking like, are the cheaters also cheating on each other?

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Because then the math doesn't work out. So some of these guys are going to.

[Eddie]

To men.

[Chrissy]

Which. Nothing wrong with that.

[Frankie]

Absolutely.

[Eddie]

But I mean you shouldn't do it while you're married. But.

[Brian]

Okay.

[Frankie]

But it's the statistical thing is kind of feeling more like there's the wife is cheating and the man is cheating.

[Chrissy]

Yes. The man is cheating and the wife is cheating.

[Frankie]

In that case, that's a whole other episode.

[Chrissy]

It's just swingers.

[Frankie]

It's just.

[Eddie]

Yeah, that's just swingers.

[Frankie]

Polyamorous.

[Eddie]

Which. Which by the way, we get a.

[Chrissy]

Ton of traffic on that episode from.

[Eddie]

From search results on Google likes.

[Chrissy]

Want you to know how.

[Frank Bernardo]

53 of all women cheat, 39 of men get caught. You want to hear something alarming? 48 of all cheating wives get caught. And in this video, I'm going to.

[Eddie]

Show you how you catch them.

[Chrissy]

Wow. We've been listening to this video now for 12 minutes and he. We're just getting to the part where he's actually. He said he was going to give us facts, but I'm not sure that those were facts. I just want to let you know that I have no idea that that.

[Frankie]

Information cite any kind.

[Eddie]

Of course he didn't. Hated his own life and his. 93 of my wives have cheated on me. If you got five. If you got 10 of my wives lined up in a room, five of them cheated on me. 5.31 cheated twice.

[Chrissy]

Oh.

[Eddie]

10 of my friends.

[Chrissy]

That's crazy. That's crazy.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Wow. I don't feel so great about marriage anymore.

[Eddie]

Now I'm kind of like, eh, I was feeling great about my wife. Now I'm like, ah, she's half of her is cheating on me.

[Frankie]

Half of her.

[Frank Bernardo]

Wife has become more judgmental towards your marriage or your relationship. One thing to note about a cheating.

[Eddie]

Maybe you're just a dick. Frankie. Maybe she's more judgmental because you're a. Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

In spouse. She's always going to try and rationalize her behavior. Always going to try and make out the your marriage is far worse than what it is. You know why? Because it makes them feel like cheating wasn't an option. I had to do it. It was so bad. They're getting all.

[Eddie]

Frankie has been in this conversation.

[Frankie]

Absolutely.

[Eddie]

He's repeating what he heard. I had to do it. Frankie, you're a dick. You're a misogynist. You're a fuck. Twaddle. You're an overgrown oaf.

[Frankie]

Justification.

[Chrissy]

I know. Poor Frankie.

[Frank Bernardo]

Oh, theatrical and dramatic on the marriage. They're judgmental. Everything you do is wrong all of a sudden.

[Eddie]

Because women are irrational. That's right. They only think with their emotions. They think with their vaginas, not with their heads. Women, man, they're like. I don't know, they're like crazy monkeys just running around your jungle screaming at things. And you're being irrational.

[Frankie]

Cheating on you.

[Frank Bernardo]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

We're men. We're like dogs. We sit, we roll over when we're.

[Frankie]

Told to and we cheat 67%.

[Eddie]

We cheat 40% more than women do. Because sometimes you just gotta find another dick to be with. You know what I'm saying? Why?

[Frank Bernardo]

Why all of a sudden? You know why? Because she's trying to rationalize her thoughts. She's wrong.

[Eddie]

She's trying to rationalize her thoughts.

[Chrissy]

What does that mean?

[Eddie]

I'm trying to rationalize my thoughts. I'm trying to think my thoughts. Okay. Frankie.

[Frankie]

Frankie. Oh, he's screaming.

[Chrissy]

I know.

[Frankie]

Oh, he's hot, dude. It's emotional. It's visceral.

[Eddie]

Oh, God. Poor Frankie. He just can't help help himself, you know?

[Frank Bernardo]

Women are a strange breed. They can actually train themselves in their mind to fabricate.

[Frankie]

Women are from strange breed.

[Eddie]

Women are from a third universe, strained breed. They have lizard people DNA. I heard it on Alex Jones.

[Frankie]

They've trained their brain.

[Eddie]

They've trained their brains. They could train their brains to make up up where we. Guys, we know we got everything clear. We see it clear as day. That wasn't a riot. That was some people having a nice day at the Capitol. What are they thinking? These Women, they're out of control.

[Frank Bernardo]

This, this marriage that just ain't working. So they can justify their ass cheating. Pay attention to that.

[Frankie]

Their ass.

[Eddie]

Their ass cheating. Their ass cheeking. It's what it sounded like. They could justify their ass cheeking. You have to justify them. They're just there.

[Chrissy]

Don't worry about it.

[Eddie]

Frank. You're on a roll today, Frank. My Golly's hot today.

[Chrissy]

2.

[Frank Bernardo]

The intimacy has faded. Hello.

[Frankie]

Hello.

[Eddie]

Who's Richard Simmons walking in the door? The intimacy is faded. Hello. Don't call me Shirley.

[Frank Bernardo]

Now this could be for a lot of reasons. You know, women are. Are very moody.

[Eddie]

So what the. Frankie, you are so bad, man. You are so bad.

[Frankie]

This is so awful.

[Eddie]

I know. Can you imagine, like, sitting down with Frankie and like, like on a first date and he's like. Well, you're just moody and irrational.

[Frankie]

You're trying to.

[Eddie]

To think your thoughts.

[Frankie]

Strange breed.

[Eddie]

Yeah, you're a strange breed. You're trying to think your thoughts. I don't think them literally. I don't think anything when I go to sleep at night. Not a thing. Crickets. You're just a whole bunch of moody.

[Chrissy]

You make this rather snappy, won't you? I have some very heavy thinking to do before 10:00.

[Rachel]

Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here. Do you ever get the. The urge to speak endlessly into the void, like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-4333. TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Feel free to call and yell all you want. Tell Brian I need a raise. Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans or tell us a little story. The juicier the better. By the way, we'd love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves. Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials at the commercial break on Insta, TCB podcast on TikTok. And for those of you who like to watch. Oh, that came out wrong. We put all the episodes out on video. YouTube.com TheCommercialBreak and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show, your free sticker, or just to see how pretty we look. Okay, I gotta go now. I've got a date with my dog. No, seriously, Axel needs food. Today is pork chop day.

[Frank Bernardo]

Tell tale sign, you know, if you're sexual.

[Eddie]

Telltale sign that your wife is sleeping with somebody else, as if she's sleeping with Somebody else and not you. You're going say, frankie, life has just.

[Frank Bernardo]

Been fading on a regular basis. Why is that all of a sudden? It's very easy. Gentlemen, open your eyes. She's getting laid from someone else.

[Brian]

Oh, man.

[Chrissy]

Could. Could it be that marriage is in is a marathon and not a sprint? And there are times when, hey, listen, you got to spice things up in the bed. There could be emotional problems. There could be depression. There could be problems.

[Frankie]

Money. There could be kids. Kids?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Have a kid.

[Chrissy]

You want to rip.

[Eddie]

You want to really put a kibosh on your sex life. Have sex and make a child. It's unbelievable. Then try and have sex while a child is sleeping in between the two of you. My dick isn't that long. Put your vagina over here. I'm just gonna hop over Matthias for a second. I mean, come on, Frankie, get it together.

[Chrissy]

There could be a million reasons why your sex life is slowing down.

[Eddie]

It's just, if you've been married for a long time, don't expect that you're.

[Chrissy]

Gonna get laid every second of every day. That doesn't happen like that.

[Frankie]

No.

[Eddie]

Take it from a guy who's been married twice.

[Chrissy]

I'll leave it there.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Frank Bernardo]

So she's constantly rejecting you. Open your eyes.

[Eddie]

So tip. If she's constantly rejecting you, you got bigger problems than sex, man. I mean, like, if you're. If you're like, hey, babe, you want to have sex? And she's like, that thing. Don't bring that thing near me.

[Frankie]

You're just moody.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, you're just moody.

[Eddie]

Ah, you're just moody. Don't bring those. Roll those testicles back up from the floor. Put it back in your pants. Best to you, scrundle fish. Scrundle foot. I just had this thought of frickin taking down his pants and his testicles roll out like one of those cartoon tongues.

[Frankie]

Yes.

[Eddie]

Oh, piss to you, Frankie. Oh, my God, I'm crying.

[Frankie]

His advice is really off.

[Eddie]

Frankie, just your cartoon character. I don't know what to say. That's it.

[Frankie]

I think that is it.

[Frank Bernardo]

Number three. They're constantly asking you to go take that trip. Why don't you go get away. Why don't you go visit?

[Frankie]

Possibly asking you to take a trip.

[Eddie]

Take a trip. Why don't you leave the house and take your furniture with you? Why don't you. Why don't you take half the stuff and sign this paperwork and take that trip you've been wanting to the other side of town in that apartment where you're going to live. Take that trip. What? Take that trip, possibly. Who says that? Hey, honey, I really want you to take that trip. But it's not. Start watching what you're drinking because she's probably poisoning you. Honey, I want you to get in the car and drive away right now. Test the brakes.

[Chrissy]

Oh, my God. What the.

[Frank Bernardo]

Emily. How about the golf trip with the buddies? You need to go. Gentlemen. There's a reason why she wants you gone so she could spend more time with the person she's cheating with.

[Eddie]

Oh, my God.

[Frankie]

So specific. This had to have happened.

[Chrissy]

Oh, this had to have happened to him. He is. Here's the thing.

[Frankie]

He went on a golf.

[Chrissy]

He thinks that his ex wife is watching this, right? And he thinks because he's. He's that self important. He thinks his. Because he doesn't think much of women, obviously. And he thinks that he's that important that his wife is now going to be watching this big YouTube star with.

[Eddie]

All 672 his subscribers, right? As he describes, without describing watching and.

[Chrissy]

Laughing and laughing and going, thank God I got half the house.

[Eddie]

Thank God I didn't sign that prenup because he was the douche I thought he was. Well, you know, it's kind of strange how I met him. Anyway, I was just sitting at the bar and he came up and said, hey, I'm your blind date. And I was like, no, you're not. And you're like, I know I'm not. I know I'm not your first date.

[Frankie]

Look at me in the eyes.

[Eddie]

Yeah, look at me in the eyes.

[Frankie]

Guys.

[Eddie]

Look at my body. Look at my body. He came in, he came in the bar like the Kool Aid man busted through the. Busted through the wall with his shirt off and was like, look at my body. Hey, I know I'm not your first choice, but I'm a choice. Oh, my God. Oh.

[Frank Bernardo]

So she's constantly push, push, pushing for you to take a trip.

[Eddie]

Trip constantly. What?

[Frankie]

Push, push, pushing.

[Chrissy]

I've never in my life as I have I ever.

[Eddie]

I've had lots of people cheat on me, but I've never had anybody push, push, push for me to take a trip. Constantly. Take that trip. Go. Are you back? You leave again. I bought your tickets to Mexico. They're on the table. I don't. Don't unpack, don't unpack.

[Chrissy]

And don't look in the shower because.

[Eddie]

The pool boy's there. Go back. Go back to Mexico. You know those whorehouses down in Costa Rica?

[Frankie]

Go to those.

[Chrissy]

I want you to go experience that.

[Eddie]

You only live once. Get out of here. See you later. I bought a ticket for you and the 19 year old babysitter. Head out to Mexico together.

[Frankie]

Take the kids.

[Eddie]

They only had one room available. King bed. Take the kids with you. Leave them at the airport. I don't give a it. Billy the pool boy's got a dick that's 12 inches long and it's curved like this. Not your flat half, half hard cock. The fire is not working. Take that trip.

[Frank Bernardo]

There's a reason why.

[Chrissy]

Oh, I bet there is.

[Frank Bernardo]

Do you ever notice that the routine might be changing? Especially if you've been in a long, long term.

[Eddie]

Do you ever notice she's spending more time with your divorce attorney?

[Frankie]

Yes, I mean that the reason.

[Eddie]

Do you ever notice she's moving stuff out of the house on a Saturday morning and packing the kids up to go on a nice long vacation with you? Without you. Something could be up.

[Frankie]

Changing the routine.

[Eddie]

She ever knows she's changing the routine.

[Frankie]

Open your eyes.

[Eddie]

That's right. She meets your next door neighbor for sex in the morning. She could be cheating on you. Might be.

[Frankie]

Possibly.

[Eddie]

Possibly. I mean, don't let your. Don't let your thoughts run wild.

[Frankie]

Don't be moody.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Listen, I don't say this to get you paranoid. I just want you paying attention to all the 300 different things that could mean your wife's cheating on you.

[Frank Bernardo]

Oh, marriage.

[Chrissy]

Let's face it.

[Frank Bernardo]

You have a routine and your wife has a routine. If all of a sudden that routine starts changing, well, there's a reason. Why, because she's making.

[Frankie]

I, I can't. I imagine that he's been in a relationship before. I mean, obviously it's not successful.

[Chrissy]

No. Yeah. I mean he would.

[Frankie]

He would say. He's saying is just doesn't make the sense.

[Brian]

Doesn't make.

[Chrissy]

I mean, listen, could all of this be construed as something to be concerned about?

[Frankie]

I'm sure the cheaters have displayed some of these.

[Chrissy]

Sure. In the history. In history.

[Eddie]

Yes, I'm sure.

[Frankie]

But it's not an immediate like she's cheating.

[Eddie]

Oh, this.

[Frankie]

Change your routine. What about living your best self?

[Eddie]

Yeah. What about living your best self and doing your thing?

[Chrissy]

And what about not having a routine? You know, that set of a routine that if she doesn't brush her teeth at new, you know, at you know, four in the morning every day. She's cheating on you.

[Frankie]

Exactly.

[Chrissy]

Sounds like you're just ultra paranoid or this has happened many times to you. These are all the different ways you have been cheated. On you. You thought back on it and was like, oh, that must have meant I should have paid attention.

[Frankie]

Attention to that. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. I mean, if she changes the routine.

[Frankie]

She's pushing me to go on a trip.

[Eddie]

If the routine change includes someone else's dick, then yeah, I can understand why. But otherwise, maybe she's. Maybe she's just a human and people.

[Chrissy]

Need to change routines. Don't ask.

[Frank Bernardo]

Time for the person that she's cheating with. So you need to pay special attention. Don't blame. Blow it off.

[Eddie]

Don't blow it off. Get a private investigator.

[Frankie]

Put a tracker on her car. Like, why'd you change your routine? What are you doing? Frankie said it. Frank. Frankie. I was watching this YouTube.

[Eddie]

You start with the right upper quadrants, usually when you brush your teeth, and now you're at the left quadrant. Are you our son's teacher? She's a woman. I know. Is that pubic hair? Is that pubic hair in your mouth? In your mouth. Or dental floss? I can't tell. Oh, it's dental floss, all right. I'm just checking. That's funny. That's funny. She usually gets into the bed around 7:05 and 7:12. You whore. You good for nothing slut. It's happening all over again. It's happening all over again.

[Chrissy]

Oh.

[Eddie]

I bet Frankie's life is, like, actually pretty sad outside these videos.

[Frankie]

I know. Yeah, he seems pretty rigid, too.

[Eddie]

Yeah. I mean, for. You know, for a guy who seems to get laid a lot or thinks again, it's like, that's. You know, people who are paranoid like.

[Chrissy]

This only get laid a lot. They don't have relationships that last for a long time because they are so jealous and so paranoid that every.

[Brian]

They can't hold a relationship because it.

[Chrissy]

Doesn'T work that way.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Not to mention it's exhausting.

[Eddie]

It is.

[Chrissy]

It's exhausting.

[Frankie]

It really is.

[Chrissy]

Why are we doing this forever?

[Frank Bernardo]

Okay, pay attention. If she's doing things different, her routine varies. She's going out more, she's dressing different, she looks different, she's coming home a little later.

[Eddie]

If your wife looks like a different person, if your wife is a different person, if your wife has hired an actress to come in the door, likely something's going on. Pay attention. Pay attention. I'm exhausted. I don't want to pay attention anymore in my marriage. I don't want to pay attention. I don't want to pay attention to anything that Astra does that's out of the ordinary. I chalk it up to she's a human being.

[Frankie]

Exactly.

[Eddie]

And I go, I love you. That's what I do. I go, I love you no matter what. Whatever.

[Frank Bernardo]

She got stuck at the office where she never got stuck before.

[Eddie]

By the way, who gets stuck at the office? You don't have the code to get out the door. I got stuck in the office. I'm stuck in the office. They won't let me out.

[Frankie]

Maybe she got a promotion.

[Eddie]

Maybe she got a promotion.

[Chrissy]

Maybe it's the big project she's been working on. Yeah, or maybe she's fucking Bob and accounts payable.

[Eddie]

Could be. I mean, it could be.

[Frankie]

Could be.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Possibly.

[Frank Bernardo]

Telltale signs. It could happen once in a while. I get that. But just pay attention to the pattern. You're gonna bust her ass out.

[Eddie]

You're gonna bust her ass out. What is that? You and your friends making up words now? You got phrases over there in Frankie V. Land. Busting her ass out. I'm gonna bust your ass out.

[Frankie]

If you were a clay one more.

[Eddie]

Time.

[Frankie]

Your ass is busted.

[Eddie]

If you brush your teeth from right to left one more time, I'm gonna bust your ass out. I got a tracker on your toothbrush. I know which way you're impression.

[Frankie]

Bust your ass out.

[Eddie]

Jennifer, we have to talk to you. Being. Why is Patty from HR in here? We should have to have a conversation with you. Last night when you were working late and Frank busted through the door without his shirt on and two ring lights saying, look at my body and I just busted your ass out, it really disturbed some of the other employees. I'm afraid. Afraid things aren't working. Oh, this is the third job in six months. Frankie showed up with a camera and a dolly When a key grip and two soundmen showed up in the office to set up for Frankie busting through the wall saying, I caught you cheating. I really am picturing this, but like with. With a bunch of cameramen around him and a dolly. Like one of those dolly that just pushes him through the wall so it looks like he's flying through the wall with his shirt off. Look at my body.

[Frankie]

I got you cheating.

[Eddie]

I got you cheating. Nope, just doing invoicing. Well, this is embarrassing. I'll be at the house if you need me. I'm gonna go back and make some dinner. Feel like Ty tonight. Honey, don't worry, I'll pay for the damage.

[Frankie]

Oh my God, Frankie.

[Eddie]

Oh, Frankie, you're one of a kind man. I'm gonna bust the wall out in your office trying to figure out what's going on. It's Me, Frankie B. Smash that like button. Smash that like button. While I smash to this wall and find my wife cheating. Nope, it's just inventory. Ah, shit. Hey, honey. Sorry. I'm really sorry. I apologize. I apologize, everybody. Hi, I'm Frankie B. And you see my. Have you seen my YouTube channel? It's for guys. Over 50 minutes of fitness, fashion, fun. I don't know, maybe photography, photography, home improvement projects. Maybe you've seen it. Here's a card.

[Frankie]

Smash that like button.

[Eddie]

Smash that like button. Okay, thanks, everybody. Bye. Then the dolly pulls backwards and all the guys file out of the hole. Janine, we're gonna have to talk about your husband again. I know. That's the third wall this month. Oh, my God.

[Frank Bernardo]

In the tip number five. Let's talk about.

[Chrissy]

Thank God it's almost over. I can't laugh.

[Eddie]

Anything.

[Frank Bernardo]

Most guys, when they get into their 50s, upper 50s, they get very complacent. They're not really paying attention to what's going on, the obvious signs, because you're. You're so caught up in your. Your own life, your routine.

[Frankie]

You always so caught up in yourself?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

You're so caught up in yourself. What are you doing all involved in yourself, thinking about yourself all the time. Yeah. He makes it sound.

[Chrissy]

He makes it sound like when you're.

[Eddie]

50, like someone turns off the switch and you're just like, I can't think about anything else. I used to be like, look at my body. And I'm like, look at my body. Look at. I'm so involved in myself. When you're at 50, they put you in a wheelchair in the old people's home. It's like you're 50.

[Chrissy]

It's 50.

[Frankie]

I know.

[Eddie]

Harrison Ford's making Indiana Jones doing his own stunts. He's 90. Come on, Frank.

[Frank Bernardo]

Your wife. Spouse for granted. And that's probably not a good thing to do, you know, if you choose.

[Eddie]

It'S probably not a good thing to.

[Chrissy]

Do to take your wife for granted.

[Frankie]

Your wife's boss. Your wife's spouse.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, your wife's spouse. Your wife's spouse.

[Eddie]

Hey, spouse. Hey, spouse. What's up with the cheating? What? I just noticed. I noticed that you put your hair in ponytails yesterday. That's not usual. I'm coming to your office again. Okay, fine. But don't bring the movie crew this time. But I already paid him for 12 videos. We're up to 900 subscribers.

[Frank Bernardo]

To ignore all the telltale signs. If you're good with that, then that's fine. But if you're Not. You need to open up your eyes. You need to start paying attention to what they're doing, all right? Especially if they know you're very complacent, very lethargic, very not caring.

[Eddie]

Look at Bob.

[Frankie]

Bob on care.

[Eddie]

Look at my husband, that fat Bob on the couch playing NFL Madden. Go ahead, whip your dick out right here. He's not gonna notice. He doesn't notice shit since he turned 50. He just lays on the couch eating Doritos, mumbling to himself something about the good old days. I remember when I used to get lots of. No, no, I don't care. Go ahead. The pool boy. I'm just thinking about myself.

[Frank Bernardo]

You're gonna walk all over your ass. You're.

[Eddie]

You're like, wow, what's up? Frankie's charged up in this video.

[Frankie]

Supercharged up. I think it's. It's very close to home.

[Chrissy]

Clearly this has happened to him.

[Eddie]

Him walk all over your ass? Jeez, Frankie, you're like shooting fish in a barrel.

[Frank Bernardo]

Okay? You're. You're easy. All right, Start calling them out.

[Eddie]

Start.

[Frank Bernardo]

Start asking what they're doing.

[Chrissy]

Start calling them out.

[Frankie]

What? Shooting fish in a barrel.

[Chrissy]

Shooting fish in a barrel.

[Eddie]

What's up, Janine? I know you can smell dick on your breath.

[Frankie]

Call them out. Bust her ass out.

[Eddie]

Call them out. Bust her ass out. What's up with the bite marks on your tits?

[Chrissy]

That's a floral print bra.

[Eddie]

Okay, Just keeping. Just want to keep you on your toes. I'm like a. I'm like a ninja.

[Frankie]

My eyes are open.

[Eddie]

That's right. I'm like a private eye ninja. When she walks in the house, I jump from. I jump from the top of the balcony and I'm like, what's up with that dick on your breath? Let me smell your breath. Is that dick? Is that the neighbor's cock?

[Frank Bernardo]

You're suspecting things. Okay, guys, just. Just open your freaking eyes. All right, guys, we're at the climax.

[Eddie]

And that is where the climax.

[Chrissy]

Jesus.

[Eddie]

The climax is the most important part. Not the end, Frankie. But whatever.

[Frank Bernardo]

Tip number five. And this is gonna be the last tip.

[Eddie]

But you just gave tip number five. I know.

[Frankie]

That's too.

[Chrissy]

Tip number five.

[Frankie]

And then he said something about 12 tips earlier.

[Chrissy]

No, I think it's five. But he said he did 12 tips earlier. That's the one we covered a couple.

[Frank Bernardo]

Months ago in this video. But it's the most obvious tip.

[Eddie]

All right, let's talk about these other ones haven't been obvious.

[Frank Bernardo]

This one's obvious about your wife's Cell phone.

[Eddie]

Have you noticed? Oh, here we go.

[Chrissy]

Frankie with the cell phone. Unbelievable. Frankie. It's like women can't use technology as they're cheating on you.

[Frank Bernardo]

Anything different in the way that she's being guarded towards that phone where before, her phone was laying out on the counter. When you go out to a restaurant or a bar, that phone is laying on the bar top or the tabletop, not hiding anything. Didn't care.

[Eddie]

All of a sudden, she sticks it in her vagina. It's like contrabaron in a jail. It's like she's smuggling drugs through Mexico.

[Frankie]

Oh, my God, Frankie. I mean, I really am.

[Eddie]

Put your phone on the table.

[Frankie]

Oh, my God. I need to see your phone right now.

[Eddie]

I need to see your phone right now. I'm sorry, who are you? I'm sorry. I'm Frankie B. I'm Frankie B. I'm your blind date. I don't have a blind date. Oh, you don't? You do now. Is that dick on your breath? Sorry. Just trying to keep you on your toes. I'm a cheating ninja. I know when women are cheating. I wish Fro could make a cartoon. Like, Frank is just, like, jumping all over the walls. Like. Like in the bathroom. He's, like, on this, holding his hands on the ceiling. And then he just jumps down while you're taking a shit, and he's like, let me see your vagina. Busted your ass. I knew it. You're changing your routine. You never shit in the morning. Who are you fucking? You're cleaning your bowels for anal sex. I know it. That'd probably get us kicked off Fireside. Just. That's an example. I wanted to throw that out there.

[Frank Bernardo]

That phone is hidden. It's in her purse, and it's on silent.

[Eddie]

There's.

[Frankie]

Isn't that the respectful thing to do when you're.

[Eddie]

I don't get it. I don't get what's going on.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Why.

[Chrissy]

Why you don't want your woman. You don't want anybody.

[Eddie]

You're a woman.

[Chrissy]

I know. I sound like Frankie is rubbing off on me. You don't want anybody. I mean, listen, leaving your phone out on the table with the down over to the side is appropriate. Right, But.

[Eddie]

But if you have a purse.

[Chrissy]

If I had a purse, I'd put it there, because that's just.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Why did her.

[Frankie]

Yeah. And with it on silence.

[Chrissy]

Frankie's so afraid of getting cheated on that he needs to see what's going on 24 hours.

[Eddie]

Using your phone right now.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

This guy.

[Chrissy]

I mean, the therapy bill this guy.

[Eddie]

Must have is huge.

[Chrissy]

He does go to therapy, though.

[Eddie]

He's probably thinks he's fine.

[Frankie]

He's giving self.

[Eddie]

Yeah, he's teaching the rest of the world how to be just as paranoid as he is. Instead of realizing that maybe he's taking.

[Chrissy]

A little bit over the edge, he's making other people feel exactly like he.

[Eddie]

Does so they fit his money. See? Told you. Everyone else feels the same way, too. You're just a crazy seventh wife.

[Frankie]

So moody.

[Eddie]

So moody with all your feelings and emotions and vagina. Yeah, stop bleeding everywhere. Okay, Go somewhere else.

[Frank Bernardo]

Mouth going on. Why is that all of a sudden? Does it make sense? I don't even have to tell you another word because you already get it, but we're still gonna talk about it.

[Eddie]

I have to say another word, but I literally can't shut up.

[Frankie]

We're still gonna talk about it.

[Eddie]

Since I was born, I literally can't shut up. It's a problem.

[Frankie]

Thank God you found a YouTube outlet.

[Eddie]

Oh, 1600 people.

[Frank Bernardo]

She's doing that because she's expecting a text from her significant other.

[Frankie]

She's got a code.

[Frank Bernardo]

If she's got a code on their phone, a lockout code to her. She never had it before.

[Eddie]

Come on, guys.

[Chrissy]

Whoa.

[Eddie]

They come like that? Yeah, they come like that. That's not her. That's Apple. Oh, my God. That's not her cheating. That's T mobile.

[Frankie]

Oh, she's texting her significant other.

[Eddie]

That's not a man. That's Verizon. She's not cheating. She's paying her ATT bill. I mean, come on. What the. Oh, Lord. Frankie, open your eyes.

[Frank Bernardo]

Call her out on that. Ask her why all of a sudden there's a lockout code. Well, in case it. I want to make sure no one getting my information.

[Eddie]

No problem.

[Frank Bernardo]

Give me the lockout code. The lockout code.

[Eddie]

Well, first of all, it's not called a lockout code.

[Chrissy]

What are you talking about?

[Eddie]

What, are you working in jail? It's a lockout code. It sounds like an 80s movie where they're, you know, they projecting technology in the future. What's the three digits for the lockout code? The world's going to blow up unless we have the lockout code. It's 1, 1, 2.

[Frankie]

I can't even imagine dating this guy. I mean, seriously, I would be like, whoa. I mean, get your phone out of your purse now and give me the lockout code.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I want your lockout code. We just met. I know, but you're cheating on me. If you don't. But. I know, but we're on the first phone call. I know, but I want to write it down just in case. Face, I'm the cheating ninja. I'm looking in your window right now. I just see Frankie, like, sticking to the window. Frankie with his shirt off, just says this, like, press, body pressed up against the window.

[Frankie]

Busting your ass out.

[Eddie]

I'm getting her lockout code.

[Frank Bernardo]

She won't give it to you, or she'll give it to you and she'll change it again. So she's super heavily guarded.

[Eddie]

Guarded, super heavily guarded. Fort Knox is super heavily guarded. A phone lockout.

[Frankie]

He's giving a lot of jail signals.

[Eddie]

Oh, my. I know.

[Frankie]

Like, guarded, buster ass out.

[Chrissy]

Super heavily guarded.

[Frankie]

He's been to the super lockout code.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Brian]

Oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

Frankie, chill out, dude.

[Frank Bernardo]

And she's never on it when she's anywhere around. You think about that. It's. It's the number one giveaway is a woman. Woman with that cell phone. So, guys, that. That's it, man.

[Chrissy]

That.

[Frank Bernardo]

That's all I got for.

[Frankie]

Wow.

[Eddie]

I learned a whole bunch of nothing.

[Frankie]

I think you should do the opposite.

[Eddie]

I feel so impressed. Let's see if he says, smash that, like, button one more time. That's my favorite thing.

[Frank Bernardo]

He says, I do got more, but.

[Chrissy]

That'S for I do got more proper English.

[Frank Bernardo]

For another.

[Eddie]

This is the king's English. I do got more. So smash that, like, button video.

[Frank Bernardo]

We covered five secret tips that your wife had.

[Eddie]

Secret tips. Secret tips. This wisdom has been passed down from cheating ninja to cheating ninja. I'm the sixth generation of cheating ninja in my family. We have caught all of our wives cheating on us. The curse of the Bernardo. The curse of those cheating Bernardos.

[Frankie]

Has.

[Eddie]

Been passed down Ancient Chinese wisdom from Bernardo to Bernardo, how to catch your wife cheating on you. Cause you know she is. I can imagine if I was married to you, I'd be cheating too, Frankie.

[Frankie]

I'd be cheating just to make him try and do all this stuff.

[Eddie]

I know. It's just fun at this point.

[Frankie]

Yeah. Let's see. If he asked you for my lockout.

[Eddie]

Code, I'd hire my own YouTube crew.

[Chrissy]

Let's watch Frankie.

[Frankie]

As he asks for the lockout code, he unravels. Yeah.

[Eddie]

As he comes unglued. A real time experiment to watch a man literally lose his. Let's watch a mess for the lockout code for the 43rd time tonight. Can I for lockout code? No. Please? No. Can I guess it? No. If I get the first number, right? Will you tell me?

[Chrissy]

No.

[Eddie]

I'll take care of you financially. No, I'm just a hooker. I'm only here for the night. You don't need my lockout code. Go on that trip you've been planning.

[Frankie]

You know what you should do? Get out.

[Eddie]

Get out. You know you should do. Leave. My favorite is if your wife changes her routine. Like if the moving truck is up.

[Frank Bernardo]

Front when you wake up cheating on you again. You know, guys, when we get into our age, we get a little bit complacent.

[Eddie]

We.

[Frank Bernardo]

We take our wives for granted. We're not always looking at things. I think it's just time to open your eyes. A little homework assignment for you guys.

[Eddie]

Oh, homework? From Frankie.

[Chrissy]

Let's.

[Eddie]

I'm gonna do it. I'll see if it works when she.

[Frank Bernardo]

Comes home tonight, tomorrow, whenever you see.

[Frankie]

Tomorrow or just whatever you see her next.

[Eddie]

Next time you see her, when the restraining order is lifted, when the judge lets you see her again, whatever.

[Frankie]

You see your wife again, just do this assaulter.

[Eddie]

Again with your verbal abuse. Start.

[Frank Bernardo]

Start thinking about the things I talked about. Just look. Just observe.

[Eddie]

I'm gonna be like this with astronomy. She's gonna be like, what's that look? I'm gonna be like, cheating ninja. Ancient Chinese secret. Ancient cheating wisdom from the Bernardo family. I'm looking at your.

[Chrissy]

Got me thinking.

[Eddie]

Tick on your breath.

[Frank Bernardo]

And if one of the five fall into place, it's like, okay. If two of the five fall into place, it's like, okay, right? And if three, we are there. I think you got her ass. Today's video. If you liked it or you thought this information was pretty darn good, smash that, like, button.

[Eddie]

Oh, my God. Who is he? Logan, Paul. Now, come on, Frankie.

[Frank Bernardo]

You have to hit that subscribe bell. And guys, I always.

[Chrissy]

Bell.

[Eddie]

Subscribe bell. What's that? What? It's a button. It's not a bell.

[Frankie]

Frankie, back to the jail.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I know. I bet Frankie has a bell at his house that he rings every time.

[Chrissy]

A new subscriber comes.

[Eddie]

He's like, ding, I got another one. And his neighbors are like, we don't care. Go fuck yourself, Frankie. Stop looking through my window. You can't have my wife's lockout code.

[Frank Bernardo]

I want you to remember one thing.

[Eddie]

Oh, another thing.

[Chrissy]

He never ends.

[Eddie]

He just never ends. He just keeps on going, going.

[Frank Bernardo]

Guys over 50, we're not dead. We're just getting started.

[Eddie]

You're getting started getting dead. Okay, gotcha.

[Chrissy]

What was that creepy laugh? I'm Frankie.

[Eddie]

B, the cheating ninja.

[Frankie]

Just getting started.

[Eddie]

This is the song I think of whenever I. Why you're Frankie B. Ready. I bet we could just like, take Frankie for a couple days around his apartment and just fast forward it and play this.

[Frankie]

That's a good one.

[Eddie]

Oh, my God, Frankie, you are.

[Chrissy]

Honestly, you are my best friend, buddy. You just. I just get endless amounts of entertainment out of you.

[Frankie]

It's great.

[Chrissy]

I don't know what else I can say. I don't know what else to do.

[Brian]

It should also be noted that that is the longest episode in commercial break history. Not the longest day that was Saturday, but the longest episode clocking in at almost two hours long. So very early on in the show's history, we had two hours of Frankie B. Material. You can never claim I don't know a good thing when I hear one. And you can also never claim that.

[Chrissy]

I don't beat a dead horse.

[Brian]

Because I do. All the time. Settle down. Not a real dead horse. I mean, not unless the horse was dead already. Then the horse isn't gonna feel it, Right?

[Chrissy]

I don't know.

[Brian]

Anyway, I'm opining. Cause I'm still a little stir crazy from putting out 12 episodes. Go listen to him. TCB's endless day. They're all in your inbox. And don't worry, TCB's next stupid stunt is right around the corner. Unless you think Brian is out of really bad ideas.

[Chrissy]

I have a ton of bad ideas.

[Brian]

And I'll tell you just right before I tell Chrissy. We'll be back tomorrow with a new episode. But you know what to do. Go to tcbpodcast.com all the audio, all the video right there at one location. Also, get your free TCB Endless Day sticker. Go to the Contact Us page. Hit the dropdown menu says I want my free sticker.

[Chrissy]

Send us your address and we will.

[Brian]

Send you one at the commercial break on Instagram. Please please follow us. TCB podcast on TikTok and YouTube.com the commercial break for all of the episodes, including TCB's endless day on video. And one last thing, if you're feeling froggy. 212-433-3822. That's 212-4333. Not 1888. Call TCB because John in Iowa has that phone number. Fuck you, John and the dead horse.

[Chrissy]

You rode in on.

[Brian]

All right, cats and kittens, until tomorrow, I love you. Best to you. And until next time, I will say, I do say, and I must say goodbye.

[Eddie]

Sam.

[Frank Bernardo]

It.