TCB Infomercial w. Kyle Kinane

Summary

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The Commercial Break – TCB Infomercial w/ Kyle Kinane

Date: April 23, 2024
Podcast: The Commercial Break
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley
Guest: Kyle Kinane

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Episode Overview

In this TCB Infomercial episode, hosts Bryan and Krissy welcome comedian Kyle Kinane for a lively, chaotic, and insightful discussion that spans polyamorous “polycule” relationships, childhood origins, the state of stand-up comedy, the glory days of hair metal, and bizarre life experiences. True to TCB’s “Cheesecake Factory of comedy podcasts” spirit, this episode blends twisted humor, nostalgic anecdotes, and self-deprecating wit with candid reflections on adulthood, relationships, and the stand-up grind.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Polycules and Relationship Chaos

[02:30–07:40, 10:27–12:59]

• Bryan and Krissy break down the polycule phenomenon, mashing up “polyamorous” and “molecule” to describe multi-person webs of open relationships:
  • “It just sounds like dicks and vaginas flying everywhere and everything in between.” – Bryan Green (04:34)
  • Both hosts voice curiosity and bewilderment, referencing diagrams with “nesting couples” and complicated hierarchies.
• Kyle’s take:
  • “It’s a sex thing.” (11:00)
  • “You just kind of horn around... And I mean that with no shame. That is your choice.” (11:30)
  • Jokes about how open relationships often mean a relationship isn’t truly working, and compares polycule attempts to “timesharing your love and affection”: “Much like regular timeshares, it ends in disaster for everybody involved.” (12:42)

2. Nostalgia, Family & Growing Up Midwest

[13:03–16:38, 20:07–24:23]

• Kyle’s upbringing:
  • Raised in "obligatory Catholicism," attended CCD (Sunday school) while parents skipped church.
    • “We had to do this when we were younger. Now you gotta do it, and nobody’s happy.” (14:00)
  • The college journey: Community college, flunking out at UIC after two months, then several years at Columbia College Chicago—“Goldilocksed” the whole experience.
  • Both hosts share misadventures in college, poking fun at academic failure and prioritizing parties over studies.
• Hair Metal & Music Memories:
  • Kyle’s first concert: Poison and Warrant. Big admiration for Tesla as “just a solid band.”
  • “You never think of a whole mall getting destroyed… I bought the Guns N’ Roses cassette, and it had the parental advisory. They let me buy it anyway. But I was at the mall with my mom…” (22:25)
  • Host and guest bond over music, tapes, and the thrill of owning forbidden albums.

3. The Stand-Up Comedy Grind

[29:49–58:48]

• Comedy Roots:
  • Kyle discovered stand-up via Johnny Carson and late-night TV specials, thought a "comedy club" was just a room full of people laughing.
  • “I just thought a bunch of maniacs were packed into a place laughing in each other's faces.” (44:36)
• First Steps:
  • Auditioned at Zanies for the HBO Aspen Comedy Festival, learned the open-mic circuit by observing courage over raw talent:
    • “I always looked for who was the least funniest... that’s the most courageous person here. If they can be that unfunny and come back every time, then I can do it too.” (48:26)
• Bombing & Experimenting:
  • Still gets nerves, embraces unpredictability, and values spaces in Portland where he can “eat it in front of people.”
  • “If nobody knows you and you bomb, they forgot about it. But if somebody that they know…” (50:31)
  • Draws a clear line about experimenting during free shows vs. paid club gigs.
• Club Life & Respect for Service Staff:
  • Marvels at waitstaff in comedy clubs: “Those are like Green Berets ... Seal Team 6 to me.” (55:44)
  • Comedians are “just a component in a restaurant,” there to “move mozzarella sticks and drinks.”

4. Relationships & Adulthood

[38:08–43:31]

• Avoiding Marriage:
  • Together with his girlfriend for ten years, intentionally unmarried: “You can’t get divorced if you don’t get married.” (38:26)
  • Pokes fun at societal norms and the impulse to fix relationship trouble by “getting engaged” or “getting a ring.”
• Personality & Comedy Philosophy:
  • Kyle describes himself as a “militant hippie,” committed to leaving the world better than he found it but admits to occasional “road rage.”
  • On comedy: “I only like comedians that come out like, ‘I was a piece of shit and I did this wrong.’ … that’s more honest to me.” (41:56)
  • Talks about self-awareness, humility, and why being the butt of your own jokes is more authentic.

5. Suburban Life & Pandemic Relocation

[24:27–32:30]

• Pandemic triggered a move from LA to Portland for more space and a slower pace; touches on the pros of suburbia (“acreage for 12 children,” jokes Bryan).
• Discusses “barrel saunas” and weather talk as markers of aging.

6. Mind-Altering Experiences

[59:32–63:16]

• Quickfire on spirituality:
  • “God’s gonna turn out to be math, and I’m bad at math… But much like math, I don’t get it but it's keeping things together.” — Kyle (60:10)
• Mushrooms, but no ayahuasca (so far):
  • Host Bryan shares a personal ayahuasca experience that ended his first marriage after a shaman’s blunt advice: “If it doesn’t change you, you’re a better man than I am” (62:27)
  • Kyle: “If I’m going to cry and shit myself, I better be a better person for it after the fact.” (63:09)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Polycules:

  • “It just sounds like dicks and vaginas flying everywhere and everything in between.” – Bryan (04:34)
  • “Much like regular timeshares, it ends in disaster for everybody involved.” – Kyle (12:42)

• On Stand-Up Philosophy:

  • “I only like comedians that come out like, ‘I was a piece of shit and I did this wrong.’” – Kyle (41:56)

• On Comedy Clubs:

  • “Any comedian with an ego, just remember, you help sell chicken fingers. Calm down.” – Kyle (58:34)
  • “Philosophize me some spinach dip while you’re at it.” – Kyle (58:54)

• On Moving to Portland:

  • “It was more like, ‘Let me try and pivot and enjoy this slower pace. Let me see if I can do it.’ And I had no problems.” – Kyle (25:45)

• On Self-Reflection and Family:

  • “My mom will call, and I’ll be like, I gotta take 30 to 40 minutes. I’ll be back in two hours. I don’t even know when I’m gonna get out of this hole.” – Bryan (30:10)
  • “So I’ve been putting a lot of thought into these barrel saunas…” – Kyle, joking about inherited rambling tendencies (31:28)

• On Spirituality and Psychedelics:

  • “God is going to turn out to be math, and I’m bad at math.” – Kyle (60:10)
  • “If I’m going to cry and shit myself, I better be a better person for it after the fact.” – Kyle, on ayahuasca (63:09)
  • “Nothing says ego death like subscribe.” – Kyle, on people filming their ayahuasca retreats for Instagram (65:07)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Polycules explained and pondered: 02:30–07:40, 10:27–12:59
• Kyle’s Midwestern upbringing: 13:03–16:38
• Hair metal nostalgia & growing up in the ‘80s: 20:07–24:23
• Life as a working comic, club culture, bombing: 29:49–58:48
• Relationship talk and philosophy on marriage: 38:08–43:31
• Spirituality, mushrooms, ayahuasca tales: 59:32–63:16

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Thanks and Where to Find More

• Kyle Kanane’s special Dirt Nap: Watch free on the 800 Pound Gorilla YouTube Channel
• Tour dates and more: kylekinane.com
• The Commercial Break: All links and episodes at tcbpodcast.com

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Tone: Irreverent, self-aware, as friendly and unpolished as the TCB brand promises.

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This episode is perfect for fans of stand-up, weird relationships, ‘80s nostalgia, and anyone who likes their comedy honest, a bit messy, and full of good-hearted digs.

Transcript

[Kyle Kinane]

My. My favorite action movies of a current day and age that we're in are the Fast and the Furious movies. Those are my favorite ones. Arguably. We know they're the dumbest ones out there. They're dumb. They know they're dumb and we know they're dumb and we're still like, give them to me. How dumb are the last one was called fast x for Fast 10.

[Brian Green]

There's 12 of them.

[Kyle Kinane]

On this episode of the commercial break. Kids birthdays. Love a good Paul Giamatti impersonator.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brian Green]

I talking to my wife about our upcoming kids birthdays and I was like, I don't know who we're gonna get. Spunky the clown chuckles. I'm not sure. And she was like, paul Giamatti, Brian. All the rage on TikTok. Have you seen the Kyle Kanane impression?

[Kyle Kinane]

She's listen, T's turning 8 and her favorite movie is Sideways. That's right. So if we just could make this dream come true. The next episode of the commercial break starts.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this crappy podcast, Chris and Joy only. Best to you, Chris. Bestie.

[Chrissy]

Brian.

[Brian Green]

Best you out there in the podcast universe. Yes, we sure do think we're funny. All right, here we go. Cheesecake Factory. A podcast back online. TCB infomercial today with one of my personal faves, Kyle Kanane. Are you excited? Okay. All right. Just making sure that you're still there with me.

[Chrissy]

Chrissy was like, follow up with something else.

[Brian Green]

Chrissy was like, wait, we have a guest.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Love Kyle. His brand new special out on the 800 pound gorilla YouTube channel. It's called Dirt nap. He's got a number of other specials, hours of comedy out there that you can watch. You know him? Go to our YouTube page, YouTube.com the commercial break. And you can watch us interview Kyle Kanane. You will know him instantly, probably just by his voice because he was the voice of comedy central for a long time. Did you know that?

[Chrissy]

That's right. I was reading that.

[Brian Green]

There you go. Look, you're studying up. I'm proud of you, Chrissy. I'm proud of you.

[Chrissy]

Thank you. And I noticed that he was also too on the green. What is it? The big city green.

[Brian Green]

Big city greens is so hot right now.

[Chrissy]

I mean, we're. I'm. I'm so hot right now with my nephew who's 8 and loves that show.

[Brian Green]

My. My kids.

[Chrissy]

I'm like, I guess who I'm interviewing. No, you can't listen to the podcast, but for future, you can know.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, but I tell my kids this too. I've interviewed these people like Reggie was on a kid's show. Reggie Watts was on a kid's that my kids love. We've had a couple Big City Greens people in now. Big City Greens is all the rage. And if you have children, then you know. Yeah, it is really funny. Wow. Disney Junior wasn't like this when I was a kid. I didn't even think Disney Junior was funny when I was a kid. Now I'm an adult and we all think it's funny. They're really doing a great job over there. Big City Greens. Check it out. But more importantly, 800 pound gorilla on YouTube. Dirt Nap is the brand new special. Kylekinane.com he will be in with us in just a few minutes. But before we do that, I do have to address one topic that you sent me. This is actually Chrissy sending me some content ideas and I love it. Polycule. Yeah, we are finding out all about polycules. Polycule is the word mashed together. The word polyamorous and molecule mashed together to make polycule. How that has any relation to what it actually is, I have no idea. But, you know, whatever's good with you, it's fine.

[Chrissy]

Fine to their own, be fine to their own. But it sounds very complicated to me.

[Brian Green]

Oh, man, does it sound. I get a headache just thinking about it.

[Chrissy]

So 20 or more people that are in a polyamorous relationship, in some cases.

[Brian Green]

A lot of people in these. And the polycule is not like polyamory, where you have multiple consensual, non monogamous relationships or partners. It's where you all, like multiple partners. Have partners. It's all a big. They call it. It's really actually hard to describe because they can't even describe.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, they say that in the article.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, they don't even know what it.

[Chrissy]

Is like a community. And everybody's just loving.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I mean, they describe it. They kind of like one lady had a diagram. I think it was on Reddit or one of those things. They had a diagram and she put it together and it looked like a V. And she had like what they called the nesting couple, which is the original starter couple. Starter couple. There was a. There. Some of these don't have hierarchies, but some do. And they had a hierarchy and it.

[Chrissy]

Was all molecules are different.

[Brian Green]

All molecules are different. I mean, I just, like, this just blows my mind.

[Chrissy]

I know, it's pretty fascinating.

[Brian Green]

It just sounds like dicks and vaginas flying everywhere and everything in between. Clean. I don't even know, like, the FedEx guy, but the FedEx guy on the rear.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Hey, FedEx guy. Thanks for dropping off the package. Can you drop off your package in my wife's best friend's cousin? We're all part of a polycule. You don't mind if I videotape it, do you? I'm just gonna touch your ass a little bit. Is that okay with you? Okay, Cool.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I don't get it, but I'm all about it.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Amen. I mean, that's way too adventurous for a guy like me. I mean. But I do. I appreciate, in some. On some level, I appreciate what's going on in those Polycula relationships.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, exactly. No, I know, Like I said, each to their own. Whatever works.

[Brian Green]

Astron and I have been together for years.

[Chrissy]

It'll work until it doesn't.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. It'll work until it doesn't. And I can guarantee that it probably doesn't work on a lot of levels. Like, there's probably a lot of infighting and arguments that go on, don't you think? Probably. But, like, Astrid and I can't agree on anything for an entire day. How do these people agree on, you know, whose partner is going to be with who, and jealousy issues. And if you're in a Polycule, I desperately want to talk to you. Desperately. Yes. Not to make fun, not to poke fun.

[Chrissy]

No. Just to learn.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I have genuine curiosity and I would like to learn. So hit us up on the phone line, because I'm just. I just love to talk to you for 15 minutes, and you can try and explain exactly what this. What this is. Because when the New York fucking Times can't even give you a description, you know that it's something way too complicated for everybody to think.

[Chrissy]

Right?

[Brian Green]

Like what? Huh?

[Kyle Kinane]

Right.

[Chrissy]

I know. I didn't even get through the whole article because I was just confused after a little while.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. You know, there's. I find that a lot in life is that I can't even get through the whole article anymore. You know what I'm saying?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

If it's like, Trump or Biden, I can't even get through the whole article. I already feel upset and depressed. If it has anything to do. I mean, let's face it, we're inundated with a lot of information. And polycules are inundated with penises and vaginas, and it's Hard to really wrap your testes around exactly what's going on in a situation like that. So when the people in the polycule have a hard time describing what the polycule is, but they just say in this one particular article, 20 or more people involved in one big and growing or shrinking or whatever relationship where everyone kind of swings with everybody. Heterosexuals, homosexuals, pansexuals, all kind of sexuals. The. All the sexuals. You. If they can do this right, then I will believe in communism. We can just go, just be communist. We'll all just live in one big polycule and see how it works out. Right?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Am I right?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

If you can figure out something as basic is not making your girlfriend or boyfriend jealous as you're having sex with the FedEx guy who just walked in the polycule, you can figure out anything. I am sure of it. I'm going to ask Kyle about this. What do you think we should ask Kyle?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, because he's got to take a stance.

[Brian Green]

He's got to take a stance. We can't let Kyle go without him falling on one side of the table or the other. As far as polycule is concerned, I say, yay, Polycule. But will Kyle say, nay, polycule? I don't know.

[Chrissy]

We will see.

[Brian Green]

We've got to ask him. So, Chrissy, I've got an idea, and I'm just gonna throw it by you.

[Chrissy]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

Why don't we take a break and then through the magic of podcastrin, then we'll just zoom him on in here. It's kind of like zoom. We'll zoom him on in here and he'll be able to talk with us and all the friendly people that are listening to the podcast.

[Chrissy]

And Brian, I love that idea.

[Brian Green]

I thought you would. All right, we'll be back with Kyle Kinane.

[Christina]

I know you're already on your phone, so pull up Instagram and follow us. Hecommercial break. And then follow us on TikTok.

[Brian Green]

Done.

[Christina]

Perfect. Thank you. Since you're at the ready, why not Text us hello at 212-4333, TCB. Or if you've got some drama in your life, a little fun story or anything, really. We're desperate for content. Call and leave us a message at 212-4333, TCV. And don't forget to check out TCVpodcast.com because that's got it all. Speaking of having it all, let's listen to our fabulous sponsors and get back to the commercial break.

[Brian Green]

And he's here with us. Now, Kyle, thank you very much for showing up on the show. Thank you for coming to our show.

[Kyle Kinane]

You bet. Yeah. I had to go all the way to my basement to be on your show.

[Brian Green]

Kyle. Kyle, you got your brand new special out dirt nap on 800 pound gorilla on YouTube. I took some time, watched it last night. I got to tell you, as already told you once before, but I'm going to repeat it so that the people listening can actually hear it. It's probably one of the best hours of comedy I've watched this year. And. And we do watch quite a bit of comedy for. For the show. But you're, like, prolific, too. You just did another hour of comedy like a year ago, didn't you?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, well, this hour, most of this hour and the last hour were all kind of came up together. They were all kind of. They're not necessarily about the pandemic, but it was just about. I was writing a bunch of stuff. There's a lot of new things happening in life, and so I, you know, had a lot to pull from, so I just had a lot of material on deck. So put the one hour out last year, and this is the second hour of that nice writing, writing spree I had over the pandemic.

[Brian Green]

So. Good. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna try do your jokes or tell your. Or, you know, quash your special. I gotta tell the audience, though. Ten of the funniest minutes of comedy of 2024 is Kyle talking about the Fast and Furious franchise. Go watch it on YouTube. Okay. Inquiring minds want to know, where do you stand on the very controversial topic of polycules?

[Kyle Kinane]

Polycules.

[Brian Green]

Polycules sounds like molecule or polyamorous. But no, we've put them together and now they're a polycule. So I'm just wondering, where do you stand on this? It's very important that you take a stand.

[Kyle Kinane]

Wait, it's a. It's a real. I mean, it's a lot of cues.

[Chrissy]

It's a lot of something.

[Brian Green]

So here's what a polycule is. A polycule is like polyamorous relationships, but it's many different relationships that come together as one. It's like a beehive of dicks and vaginas, as I think is how I interpret.

[Chrissy]

Seems very complicated getting together.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's a sex thing.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I guess. Or like a relationship thing. We just read about a little community. Yeah. Now we're stumped ourselves, actually, on. On how it works. It's like they're polyamorous, but Instead of just, you know, having multiple girlfriends or multiple boyfriends, they have like multiple relate. Like the FedEx guy could be involved. You never know. Like, they have a big diagram. They put it together and they explain where people go and we can have sex.

[Kyle Kinane]

So. So it's not. I mean, and I don't. I don't mean this disparaging, but it's just. You just kind of horn around.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

That's it.

[Kyle Kinane]

And I with. I mean that with no shame. That is your choice.

[Chrissy]

We're good with that, too.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's just a fun. I like the term.

[Brian Green]

Me too.

[Chrissy]

Poly for anything.

[Kyle Kinane]

Anytime the cat wouldn't come home. Cat's out, horn around.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I used to think that polyamorous meant was like French for your. Your marriage isn't working. But now I understand that non monogamous, you know, non monogamous consensual relationships are a big deal.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And apparently since the pandemic when everybody opened their drawers, I've never heard any.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. Anytime somebody's like, oh, yeah, we're like in an open relationship, like, you're just not broken up yet, that's all.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Never. I've never seen one that's.

[Chrissy]

I know.

[Kyle Kinane]

I don't lasted long, you know.

[Brian Green]

No, we talk about that.

[Chrissy]

Why did they get married to begin with?

[Brian Green]

I don't know.

[Chrissy]

Kind of do your thing.

[Brian Green]

I have friends that had the best of intentions with polyamorous relationships. Like, they really were like, non monogamous. We love who we love. We're going to do what we do. We can integrate. And three months later, they had divorce attorneys sending letters back and forth to each other and came off the brink. Only because they stopped having relationships with other people.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. Let me timeshare my love and affection and see how that works out. Much like regular timeshares, it ends in disaster. It ends in disaster for everybody involved. Nobody's happy. They tried it. It sounded great on paper.

[Brian Green]

It did.

[Chrissy]

Yep.

[Brian Green]

Have you ever had a timeshare?

[Kyle Kinane]

No.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

I've never had a threesome. Real by the book kind of fella.

[Brian Green]

How did you grow up that you grew up like, I feel like you and I are twins because you grew up just a short hour and a half drive from me. Born just around six or seven months difference from me. And then also probably a different hospital completely. So in my mind, we're like twins. Did. Did you originally. Yeah. Original. You grew up in Addison, didn't you?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. Yeah. Where's this hour and a half away you're discussing Oak Forest.

[Brian Green]

Well, hour and a half if you take the traffic. Oak Forest, which is down near Oak park and Oak Lawn. All the oaks are together down there.

[Kyle Kinane]

The cluster of oaks.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, the cluster of oaks.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

How did you grow up? Did you grow up in a particularly religious family or.

[Kyle Kinane]

No, no, the kind of obligatory Catholicism that was pretty. Pretty big in the area. Like, you're gonna. We didn't. I didn't go to Catholic school, but I did go to ccd, so. Sunday school.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I went to that, too.

[Kyle Kinane]

And so then my parents didn't go. Like, I would. They would drop us off for cc. Like, why are you going to church? Like, we already went. Like, we. We had to do this when we were younger. Now you got to do it, and nobody's happy. Nobody's happy about it.

[Brian Green]

Are you kidding me?

[Christina]

Wait.

[Brian Green]

Your parents would drop you off at ccd, but they wouldn't go to church at the same time. They'd be like, no, this is just something you gotta do on your own.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. They're like, this is your. We signed you up for this. You don't go. We went. We went when we were younger. You gotta go.

[Brian Green]

Nothing.

[Kyle Kinane]

That's what church is about.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Listen, it's perfectly safe in there with all the priests. Don't worry about it. Yeah, fine, young Kyle.

[Kyle Kinane]

See you in three hours. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And then when did you. Did you go to college? Did you have the college experience? Chris and I were several. Oh, yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Really? Really. Goldilocks. The whole college experience. Just kind of had to try a few on. I went to. I went to College of DuPage Cod State out there in Glen Ellen, Glendale Heights. I loved. I loved. That was community college. I loved it. And I only went for a year because I was like, well, community college is great. Regular college is gonna be even better. I made it about two months at UIC before I failed out.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. And then we said, yeah, like we knew Kyle was gonna fail out.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, of course. You knew. One of those. A dropout had to be in there somewhere. And then. And then I went to Columbia for five years.

[Brian Green]

Oh, then you went to Columbia. You followed that up with Columbia?

[Kyle Kinane]

Everybody follows it up with Columbia. Not New York. Columbia.

[Brian Green]

Oh, okay.

[Kyle Kinane]

No, come on. You're from Chicago. No, the liberal arts. You don't need a high school diploma. Columbia, Columbia College, Chicago.

[Brian Green]

If you Goldilocks, your college education. I don't even know what I call my college education. I showed up for a few classes and then decided that cocaine sounded much better than any classroom that I was in.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, that's where the real ideas. Yeah, that's a real marketplace of ideas. It's in this bathroom of this club.

[Brian Green]

Technology in the future are right here on my nostrils and my brain. We're gonna change the world right here. And tomorrow, all I'm gonna want is a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich and a nap. I promise you.

[Kyle Kinane]

I got all the. You're not gonna believe this, you guys, but I just found all the answers.

[Chrissy]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

The string theory. I figured it out. It's a polycule.

[Kyle Kinane]

They're in the bathroom at Medusa.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, we were talking about. I was just talking with a friend of mine. We had Steve O. On, and he was explaining to us that he did one night he had like a five hour cocaine bender with Mike Tyson. And I was like, yeah, I still can't believe that. And I'm like, why would. Yeah, how was that? And he was like, oh, he's the sweetest, nicest guy. I think cocaine is such an anxiety inducing experience. In the first place. At least at my age, it probably is that I would be so nerv. To be stuck in a bathroom with Mike Tyson all.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I only see like a. Like a pit bull, like just a train fighting. You can just see one. One trigger that freaks him out. And you're in a stall with them.

[Chrissy]

I know, right?

[Kyle Kinane]

Enclosed space.

[Brian Green]

And he uses those bricks to just pound your ass in.

[Chrissy]

Is that fight still on?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it is.

[Kyle Kinane]

Oh, yeah, he's gonna. Yeah, he's got a. He's got to fight. The. The YouTube fell.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

What's his name? Aaron Carter?

[Chrissy]

No, Jake Paul.

[Kyle Kinane]

Honestly, it might. It might be.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

I don't know who's.

[Brian Green]

Who out of that group, but it's Jake Paul, right?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I think so.

[Brian Green]

Jake Paul. I. I can't imagine. First of all, I can't imagine Paul Gatti.

[Kyle Kinane]

Paul Giamatti is gonna fight Mike Tyson. This is insane. This is insane.

[Brian Green]

I give Giamatti a one in a one in a hundred chance.

[Kyle Kinane]

I saw his training videos. He's working for it. He's working real hard for it.

[Brian Green]

You know, they announced Giamatti.

[Kyle Kinane]

I don't think I could do it.

[Brian Green]

Get out of here. Get out of here.

[Kyle Kinane]

Mike. What do you want to do with this? Mike, Come on. That's the worst impersonation of Paul Giamatti anybody can ever.

[Chrissy]

I know.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's really as I'm doing. I'm like. I don't know what he sounds like.

[Brian Green]

He sounds like that.

[Kyle Kinane]

I've never tried. I've never tried to Be Paul G. Body in my life.

[Brian Green]

I don't know. He might have a career in it. So.

[Kyle Kinane]

Kids, kids, birthdays. Love a good Paul Giamatti impersonator.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I was talking to my wife about our upcoming kids birthdays, and I was like, I don't know who we're gonna get. Spunky the Clown. Chuckles. I'm not sure. And she was like, paul Giamatti, Brian. It's all the rage on TikTok. Have you seen the Kyle Kanane impress?

[Kyle Kinane]

She's. Listen, Tawny's turning eight and her favorite movie is Sideways.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Brian Green]

So.

[Kyle Kinane]

Can make this dream come true?

[Brian Green]

Her favorite movie is Sideways. Cause it reminds me of mommy and.

[Kyle Kinane]

Daddy and also my fictional child. And that joke was named Tawny for some reason.

[Brian Green]

Because you're down in the basement learning ZZ Top licks with your Tawny poster.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. It's the white snake. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Somebody had to keep those cars clean.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Brian Green]

She did. With her ample breasts, her ample bosoms.

[Kyle Kinane]

Somebody had to. Yeah. Writhe around. I wonder if David Coverdale was a polycule.

[Brian Green]

I.

[Chrissy]

You know, I would think so.

[Brian Green]

You gotta imagine, polycules started, like all good things probably in the glam rock days of the 80s. Were you like a glam rock. Were you like a glam rock guy when you were growing up?

[Kyle Kinane]

I loved it. I was. I grew up on the back end of that. And the beginning. End of grunge.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, me too.

[Kyle Kinane]

So I had to like, bridge the. Yeah. Bridge the gap. But I. I like the. The late 80s, like, hair metal scene. I loved it. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. So let me ask you a question. So were you, like, which hair metal bands were your favorite? Name one or two.

[Kyle Kinane]

The first concert I ever went to was Poison and Warrant.

[Brian Green]

Holy. Yeah. Yeah. The Rosemont. Oh, God.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. I liked. I still think Tesla's a respectable band.

[Brian Green]

I have to agree with you. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

They never. They were just a good rock band. They didn't go like crazy with the hair and makeup. Solid band. Went and saw him a couple years ago.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. So you. So when Guns N Roses comes out, I'm going to see if we have similar experiences when Guns n Roses come out and you're just a young Kyle Kinane there in the suburbs of Chicago. What do you think about Guns and Roses? Like, blow your fucking mind.

[Kyle Kinane]

I remember when Guns N' Rose. So that was, I think, 1986. But then it was. It took a couple years for a sweet child of mine to. Really.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I think like 88 or something like, get out.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, and I remember. Oh, yeah. I remember that song playing. I remember a kid that, like, I thought. A kid that I thought was cool was in the. The parade, like, the Community Days parade. Boombox on the float and he's playing Sweet Child of. I'm like, this guy can't even get any cooler. And he got cooler. I mean, he's already cool. He's in a parade and they let him have a boombox and he's just gonna play Guns N Roses. Coolest guy I've still, as I describe it now, show me a cooler guy than that.

[Brian Green]

I just imagine, like, it's just the guys riding down the float parade and all the parents are, like, screaming and covering the children's ears. This world is falling apart.

[Kyle Kinane]

It may as well be my. Yeah, this bad boy doesn't G and F about what people think of him.

[Brian Green]

Tipper Gore. Is that the correct.

[Kyle Kinane]

I bought. I wound up buying the tape at Stratford Square Mall, which is currently about to be destroyed.

[Brian Green]

Oh, really?

[Kyle Kinane]

I follow some subreddits about the Chicago suburbs. They're like, yeah. I'm like, well, like, you never think of, like, a whole mall getting destroyed.

[Brian Green]

No. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Like, they're always, like, inside of it, there's always the functioning parts. And this is like, oh, no, they're gonna tear down small. But I bought the Guns N Roses cassette, and it had the parental advisory, and they let me buy it anyway. But I was at the mall with my mom, and I was like, mom, check out what they sold to me. And she's like, ah, it says Prince. I don't know if I should let you listen to this. I'm like, well, I bought it, so there's nothing.

[Brian Green]

You can do what you do.

[Kyle Kinane]

She didn't get. She didn't give a.

[Brian Green]

She didn't give a. My parents wouldn't let me get. Like, when that big parental advisory thing came out, I remember my first two tapes. Beastie Boys and Run DMC are the first, like, tapes that I own. My parents got them for me for Christmas. But there was, like, something that I want, like, Huey Lewis in the news or something. I wanted Huey Lewis in the news. And my mom said, during that time. What's that? Yeah, he was huge. Please. He's huge now. Yeah, a good Hugh Lewis. A good Huey Lewis concert.

[Kyle Kinane]

Only news I want to listen to.

[Brian Green]

That's right. So. But my mom said, mom, you know, Santa brought me or whatever. I don't even know if I knew the Santa was real or not at that Time. But I'm like, hey, I didn't get the Huey Lewis in the news one. And she says, yeah, it's too adult. Adult for you? And I said, it's too adult for me. And then I had run DMC and Beastie Boys as the two tapes that I did show up with, but I.

[Kyle Kinane]

Think they met adult. Like, this is what adults. It's not like mature maturity levels. Just like you're too young to be like, to turn into this guy.

[Brian Green]

You're too young for freeform jazz exploration. I'm sorry, it's just not you. You don't want watch public television.

[Kyle Kinane]

Comes with a free copy of Turbo Tax. Like, oh, this just. Yeah, quick. That's just not going to be fun for you. It's not going to be enjoyable.

[Brian Green]

So how did you end up in. In Portland?

[Kyle Kinane]

We.

[Brian Green]

Your wife's from there, right?

[Kyle Kinane]

It's. It's. We define it. We let the spirits define it. Yeah, we were in LA. I was in LA for 17 years. That's where we met and were together. And then the pandemic happened and we had a chance to. There's a house that like her and her brothers co own that was going to be empty for the time being. Like right at the beginning of pandemic.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

You want to come up here and occupy this place? Like. Yeah, yeah. Get out of a major city and have a yard and.

[Chrissy]

Right.

[Kyle Kinane]

A yard to drink beer in and just kick back while everything seems to crumble for a little while.

[Chrissy]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

I mean, you talk about this on the special, you give it. You give it some time. But yeah. One of the things I had a question about with the special is you say, you know, a. It's. I just felt like it was time to go back to the suburbs. Right. Chill out a little bit and, you know.

[Chrissy]

Change of pace.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, change of pace, you know. Yeah. Go from, well, 4 ounces of coke to 3 ounces of coke a week. I get it. I'm on the same path. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's all downers out in the burbs.

[Brian Green]

Trying to wake up.

[Kyle Kinane]

I gotta wake up early, work on this yard.

[Brian Green]

So do you. Go ahead. So what?

[Kyle Kinane]

Oh, no, I was gonna say, yeah, I don't. It was more like we. The choice was not made for us, but like, oh, I'm going to go to the suburbs. Let me try and pivot and enjoy this slower pace. Let me see if I can do it. And I had no problems.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, me neither. I did the same thing, but I have 12 children, so, yeah, I have 12 children, and they're all really young, and it's hard.

[Kyle Kinane]

You need acreage for 12.

[Brian Green]

I got. I got a little bit of acreage, and I got a pool and a place to lock them away when I'm irritated with them. So I feel like that's. That's the best.

[Kyle Kinane]

So do you really have 12 or you be having me on.

[Brian Green]

I'm the king. We.

[Kyle Kinane]

Listen, we started with Polycule. I don't know what kind of weird.

[Chrissy]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, sure.

[Kyle Kinane]

So I don't know what kind of stuff you got down into. Down in Oak Lawn or wherever you're from that Amish country already. You already have, like, a bunch of kids and no zippers. I don't know what's going on down there. That's why they have all those kids. No zippers, nothing to keep the genitals in.

[Brian Green]

When we. When my wife and I were driving around. I'll tell you the story. When my wife and I. Because everybody asked this, and I don't think I've ever said this on the show, but my wife and I were driving around and we see these stickers on the back of the car. It's mom, stick figures. Mom, dad, you know, Kyle, Joel, whatever. They. They actually put the amount of children that they have, the sexes of the children, through the stick figures. And then some of them even have the names of the children on the bottom of them. I'm like, how ridiculous is that? Why would you just broadcast that to the world? So when we got this show, I started fooling around. And every time I say how many children I have, it's a different number. And so no one really knows how many children I have, but the answer is three. I have three children.

[Kyle Kinane]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

But they're all under five.

[Chrissy]

Seems like 12.

[Kyle Kinane]

Seems like that's. Yeah, all under five. I do the stick figure people. I always wondered how dark you can make those. Like, if you had, like, the mom and dad, like, two kids and then just like a little tombstone.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Like, I just. Just, like. Just to see if you can mess with, like, how much you can mess with people. Like an abortion tally on there or something.

[Brian Green]

Not anymore, Kyle. Can't do it anymore. No more abortion.

[Kyle Kinane]

This is Tawny, this is Toby. And this is a marker to remind me that I just wasn't ready. I was a freshman in college.

[Brian Green]

Just put little tombstones, like mom, dad, little tombstones. Sorry for all the drama.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I had to get my degree first.

[Brian Green]

It was a long night at the sorority. Do you find. Do you find as you're getting older. I'm just asking a question because I think this is. You find as you're getting older that you talk more about the weather.

[Kyle Kinane]

You know what? It's such an easy thing to bring up. That's not divisive.

[Chrissy]

True.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, true.

[Chrissy]

That is very true.

[Brian Green]

I didn't think about it.

[Kyle Kinane]

I don't think. I, I don't. You know what? I think I, I, I think I'm. I'm a bit from a family that there's no such thing as dead air.

[Brian Green]

Ah. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

So I think it is. That's where it comes into play when.

[Brian Green]

You talk about your mom on this latest special on dirt nap on YouTube. 800lb gorilla. Go watch it. Now, when you talk about your mom, that and your dad, that's like a super familiar scene to me because my mom is the exact same way. And my dad used to tell her, you're going around your ass to get to your elbow. Tell the end of the story. Like, he would tell her. He would be like, vicki, you're going around your ass to get to your elbow. Let's just wrap it up, could we? But she would spend days on the phone with people and just yammering about what? And they were the neighbors. They were, like, right next to next door, and they would get together all the time, and yet my mom would find another two hours of conversation with them after they had already been talking for two hours. And so it's.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's its own gift.

[Chrissy]

It really is.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it really is. And now that. Go ahead.

[Kyle Kinane]

I was gonna say that my friend has a phrase. Instead of going around, ask, get your elbows. Because I asked you what time it. I asked you what time it is. Not how the watch works. That was his way. That's his way of saying that.

[Brian Green]

And when my mom calls, I feel like, like you do when mom calls, it's like, oh, God. I mean, Chrissy knows this. My mom will call, and I'll be like, I got to take 30 to 40 minutes. I'll be back in two hours. I don't even know when I'm gonna get out of this hole. I'm not even sure. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. And it's. I, you know, I try to acknowledge that, like, oh, it's just somebody's got a lot. They just. They built it all up, and they're happy to talk to you.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

So I try not to be. I try not to be rude. Sometimes I find myself being rude. Sometimes it's a gentle bumper bowling ourselves to the end. And we were talking about this. And this was the subject we were reaching for here. But I know I wind up doing the same thing because my girlfriend called me on it. Because the special I did before, I talk about how my mom will just say these things that seemingly come out of nowhere. But then two weeks ago, I woke up, my girlfriend woke up, I was already up, and apparently the first thing I said is, so I've been putting a lot of thought into these barrel saunas. And that's the first thing she didn't know that I'd been laying awake for an hour and a half looking up barrel saunas on my phone, just waiting for her eyes to open so I can be like, Anyway, I've come to a conclusion on the barrel songs.

[Chrissy]

I was looking into those things too. They look pretty cool.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. It's not necessarily what you want to hear about when it's the first time you open your eyes to greet the day good morning. Yeah, I know this is what you were dreaming about. I wonder if Kyle's come up with a decision about barrel songs.

[Brian Green]

How does she call you out? Like, what is. Like, is she just like, hey, honey, honey, listen, it's too fucking early for the rambling. Can we just like put it away, Let me get a cup of coffee, we'll get back to it.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. Or if, if it's, you know, if I've been on the phone with my mom or something, like, oh, she just says stuff and she'll just be like, well, yeah, barrel saunas. All right, Touche. Appreciate it. It's keeping me in check and I value that.

[Chrissy]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

Well, now I have a question. What is a barrel sauna? Because like the actual barrel that you.

[Kyle Kinane]

Just like heat up, it look, it's, it's. It looks like a giant wine cask on its side.

[Brian Green]

Oh.

[Kyle Kinane]

It'S a little door on the end and you just sitting there and. Yep, it's a sauna. Yeah. I got real into them being in Portland and we had a gym membership or they had a nice sauna. And the winters here are pretty gloomy.

[Brian Green]

I can imagine.

[Kyle Kinane]

So it was like some sort of body warming effort. Hot tub or sauna, probably going hot tub. Even though the other week I was pretty stoked. Hot tubs just more. It just lends itself to that polycule lifestyle. I agree with you so much.

[Chrissy]

I'm picturing people with wine.

[Brian Green]

But I've drinks, I've taken a stance. Yeah, I've taken a stance as of late. And that is, is I only want to go into a hot tub where I understand. The chain of ownership. Right? It's like, kind of. I don't know, It's DNA evidence inside of a courtroom. I want to know the chain of ownership, who owns it.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's like a. It's like a bitcoin validation.

[Brian Green]

I want to see your ether ledger. Do you get into bitcoin? No.

[Kyle Kinane]

No. By the time somebody explained it to me, it was up and down and gone already. My buddy, who knew about it 14 years ago or 12 years ago or whatever. I wish I would have listened to him.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I know. It just seems too late now to figure it out.

[Brian Green]

My little brother had this kid that we grew up with. He was like. Derelict would be a nice word to say, but he's a very nice human being. I think he means well, but I'm not sure. All the cylinders fire, and so he would do stupid shit like, you know, take a pound of heroin from one state to another with a gun because someone told him to do it and make a thousand dollars.

[Kyle Kinane]

You're like, he would do stupid. I'm like, oh, yeah. Wacky hijinks.

[Brian Green]

I know.

[Chrissy]

I didn't expect that.

[Kyle Kinane]

Felony trafficking, okay. That's crazy.

[Brian Green]

Murder.

[Kyle Kinane]

It's crazy. This crazy ragamuffin and his hijinks. I know when you said, he'll dispose of a body, I was like, what?

[Brian Green]

He's spying for the Iranian government? That's silly. Little guy. He's always up to something, but he would just get himself in these, like, okay, criminal situations. Whatever I call them, what they are. Criminal situation. But, you know, he was dumb. He was just like. And I don't say dumb. I want to. I don't want to make the guy feel bad if he's listening, but he was just a little like. Yeah, he couldn't really put all the things together sometimes times. So he. He moves out to California, and then, because he had a warrant in California, he runs down to one of the islands. I can't remember. One of the Virgin Islands. And. And in the Virgin Islands, he meets a guy who is setting up a server farm inside of one of the houses in this location where he lives, in this neighborhood where he lives. So they're at the pool or at the bar or whatever, and he says, hey, what are you doing? I see all those, you know, big boxes showing up at your house with all the electronics. He says, I'm mining bitcoin. And he goes. He's like, what the is bitcoin? This is years ago. He goes, what the is bitcoin? So he explains it and then this guy, on the advice of his next door neighbor, whoever lives wherever he lives, he says, you know, get yourself some of these servers and start mining, and I'll even front you the money for it. You can give me whatever 30% or whatever it is. So the guy is now, he sold a lot of that bitcoin. He got in very early. He sold a lot of that bitcoin, and he now never has to work a another day in his life. I swear, if you would have looked at him 25 years ago, you would have been like, just pray he makes it. I just pray he makes it. He's. He's not doing. He's doing stupid. I just pray. In the castle. Yeah, he's got a house there, and he's got a house here, and he's got a house.

[Chrissy]

What happened to the warrant?

[Brian Green]

He paid an attorney to go take care of it. He got like an attorney Cash money, money.

[Kyle Kinane]

Took care of the warrant.

[Brian Green]

Money, money, money.

[Kyle Kinane]

But that's kind of awesome. But you think about like it is the people that gamble or would take a risk on some wilder ideas that, you know, nine out of 10 of them are foolish and don't work. But it's the fortune favors the bold kind of scenario where, yeah, everybody else just doing what you're supposed to do and not taking any risks wanted a piece of it way too late.

[Brian Green]

But I unfortunately, am not bold, so I take a lot of risks. But it's on the dumb side. I'm buy low. It's fine.

[Kyle Kinane]

That's right. Buy low. Lose proof that you own the shares in the first place. Forget about it. Call it a wash. That's. I think that's how I go.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

You know, I used to have Disney stock. My grandparents, my grandma would buy Disney stock for us for our birthdays and for our Christmases for, like, I don't know, the first 12 years of my life, they would buy Disney stock. Buy Disney stock. And back then you would get like a piece of paper in the mail. It'd be like, you know, hey, Disney stuff. Yeah, Shares. Can't for the life of me find that paper. Can't for the life of me find that paper. But I am almost sure that I would not be four episodes a week on this.

[Kyle Kinane]

I was gonna say, man, I don't know how much does. It might pay off like a new Nissan Sentra. I don't know. What you got? How much you got?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's kind of what I got. All right. That's the level of podcast we are Nissan. Damn.

[Kyle Kinane]

Y' all can afford Nissan Sentras?

[Brian Green]

It's tough out here for a podcaster. I know you're not.

[Kyle Kinane]

I only go once a week. I'm not buying Nissans. Not getting Japanese made off of it.

[Brian Green]

How long have you and your. Your girlfriend bed together?

[Kyle Kinane]

We will be celebrating ten years in a few weeks.

[Chrissy]

Oh, congratulations.

[Brian Green]

Congratulations, Kyle.

[Kyle Kinane]

Ten years of avoiding marriage.

[Brian Green]

Do you really just feel like. Like leave it up to whatever it's called? Is that kind of your take on it? Is like, we're together, we don't need to prove to anybody else. Have a piece of paper, none of that bullshit.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. You can't get divorced if you don't get married.

[Chrissy]

True.

[Brian Green]

Wow. What a really smart take on that. That. I wonder if I could take that to my wife.

[Kyle Kinane]

Smart. I don't think that's. I think it's smart. I think it's. I just like the people that, like, you know that somebody's gonna get divorced and, you know, they want to just be married. It's like, just date somebody.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Just be with them. Why do you need the legality? Like, why do you love court so much?

[Brian Green]

I think a lot of people get stuck in their heads. It's like, yeah, we should break up, but instead, let's get engaged, because that's the next natural step. It's like, you know, you're dating, and then it becomes more serious, and you have that honeymoon period, and then you're like, well, let's move in together. That'll be fun. We can do that and play house for a while. And then, you know, you get irritated with each other. You should go to therapy, but instead you get a ring. And I just feel like that's. That's like, the mistake that some people make. I know. I made one like that.

[Kyle Kinane]

Exactly like that. You talking about your current marriage?

[Brian Green]

No, my current marriage is lovely, but I'm twice married, so. My first. Yeah, I just think we probably. Oh, you are.

[Kyle Kinane]

No, for you.

[Brian Green]

For round two. Yeah, round. Round two. And I'm not doing another one. I'm way too old for that. My. My back will give out if I have to do another honeymoon night. You know what I. I. You know what I like about you, Kyle?

[Kyle Kinane]

You.

[Brian Green]

And I don't know if I'm getting. If I get the right take. I'm about to analyze a little bit. I see you as, like a. Like a militant hippie. Like a hippie, but a guy who's got a real. Like, you got pointy edges. Right. You. You have your Opinions and, and you try and like navigate the world in a kind and aware way, but if something was to make you upset, you'd, you'd let people know. Am I getting that right?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I try to. My first. I, I wish. With the exception of road rage. I don't know, this isn't like I'll get, I get angry about stuff and it's never like at the end of the day me going, yeah. And I was right. It's always like. I remember how you just yelled like that in the car for no reason. You let these things take away your happiness.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

You let one turn signalless driver eat up 4, 4 hours of your day. So yeah, it's, it's. I just, you know, it's a, it's an ongoing quest to not leave behind a worse place than you found it. You know, the campground rules. So I guess that's pretty hippie. Yeah, leave it, leave it cleaner than you found it.

[Brian Green]

I really do appreciate that attitude though because I think that the world could use a little bit more of it. And I don't know, you come across as like a real nice self aware guy who also happens to be fucking lame.

[Kyle Kinane]

No, it's. I, I guess I, I could be a dick. I know I can be a real dick. I think that's the, I think that's the whole, that's the engine of all the comedy.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Is we like with comedy, every comedian gets to like paint the picture whoever they, whoever they want to be to the audience. And it's the ones that like. I don't agree with anybody that comes out as the hero when they're telling their own story.

[Brian Green]

Ah.

[Kyle Kinane]

I only like comedians that come out like that was a piece of shit and I was a fool and I did this wrong. Like that's what I like, like that's more honest to me.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I think I'm with you. Like I, I resonate more with self effacing people who can look at themselves and like, you know, they can be the butt of their own joke and, and braggadocious. And we have experienced this just on the show ourselves. We've had a number of comics on and I just think the ones. There's a few that, that came out, you know, with. I don't know how to say this.

[Kyle Kinane]

Their.

[Brian Green]

It was a hard name. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Name, name, name.

[Chrissy]

Do you name name.

[Kyle Kinane]

Come on the commercial break time. Well, there was a Hollywood minute.

[Brian Green]

Well, I'm telling you what Joan Rivers was an. I'm just saying that Joan Rivers was an. So there you go, I speak of the dead. But sometimes you can just tell, like, you know, they, they, it's, they have a hard time fitting the head on the screen. But then there's people, I think, who, who can laugh at themselves and are self aware about it. Like, you know, and I think that to me is, I can relate to that more than someone who just comes out and bloviates for, for an hour.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. I, I, I'm, I'm the only subject that I'm qualified dissecting.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. That's fair enough.

[Kyle Kinane]

I'm, this is the only thing I'm an expert in is being who I am. I'm not an expert in anything else. So I can't talk about stuff. And you should do it like this. And this is how the world should be.

[Chrissy]

I'm like, where did you first develop your love for comedy or, you know, just to want to try this out?

[Kyle Kinane]

I was my, I used to go, I always say it was like, I saw it on the Tonight Show. Johnny Carson. First I saw Stand up and then I had cable, we had cable TV at an early age. There's like all like the late night specials that were on. And so I was watching, I didn't even know what, I didn't even know where you did it real. I thought it existed only in television. Like a TV show.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Like, I didn't know there was stand up comedy clubs. I'm a little kid, I don't know about nightclubs.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And then they're like, well, there's these people there. And there was a comedy club that was not far from my house growing up. I just remember asking what the building was. I don't know if they had it painted outside like comedy club. And I asked my parents, like, what the comedy club. Like, I know what comedy is. Like. Oh, people just go in there and laugh. I'm like, what a stupid sounding building. I honestly thought it'd be like instead of a dance club, people were just.

[Brian Green]

Like.

[Kyle Kinane]

Like, it still doesn't make sense. It wasn't explained that there was somebody in there telling jokes to make the people laugh. I just thought it was a bunch of maniacs were packed into a place laughing in each other's faces. All right, well, it's music. You dance to music, so you laugh at a comedy club. I guess.

[Brian Green]

I don't know.

[Kyle Kinane]

So it's still, I still need to get a real good idea how that stuff worked.

[Brian Green]

I'll take a nitrous oxide on Ice place.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, yeah. It's just a bunch of giggling idiots over in that room on the side of the highway. So then I found out, you know, I obviously learned that, you know, Zany's and there's the other comedy clubs and read in a newspaper when I was working, I would work at a gas station to read all the newspapers that came in for that day. And there's one like open casting call for some comedy festival at Zany's downtown. I'm like, well, you're on college number three and you work in a gas station and you deliver pizzas. Maybe you gotta get over yourself and try out some of these dreams that you had. Cause nothing else you're doing is looking great.

[Brian Green]

Nice. You're a fifth year Columbia student. You got everything going for you.

[Kyle Kinane]

Fifth year, that seven year total on college, if you're keeping track. They made me graduate Columbia. Like you took in a credits. You're getting a bachelor's degree. I don't want. I don't want one because then I just have to leave here and get a job and then everything's just gonna suck for the rest of my life. I got my graduated. I just moved to la. I'm like, I may as well have a shit life out on the coast.

[Brian Green]

I could see the student advisor. Kyle, Your time's up here.

[Kyle Kinane]

My friend.

[Brian Green]

As much as we love you. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

You've been in college for seven years. Years. You were gonna get one of these. I'll fail a class. Just watch me.

[Brian Green]

I'll start all over. Let me start all over.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, yeah. I'm changing majors. It doesn't matter.

[Brian Green]

You're getting a bachelor's degree in what? We don't know. But you're leaving this campus.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. It really was like general studies or some.

[Brian Green]

Was it general studies? Is that what the. That's.

[Kyle Kinane]

It was. It was set like with a focus on creative writing, but it was just real. The most Columbia college bachelor degree you could get.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

The most liberal arts bachelor degree.

[Brian Green]

It's fucking funny. Wait, was so like Zany's was your first? Did you just decide, hey, I'm gonna go give this a shot. Why not?

[Kyle Kinane]

I did that. I did that open mic or that, that showcase they were having for a festival and it was like there was comics that drove in from all over the midwest to trial for what would wind up being the Comedy Arts Festival. U.S. comedy Arts Festival in Aspen, which was a very big hbo. Yeah. Which I wound up going to and bombing spectacularly in 2007.

[Brian Green]

So did you really? Like, like it was just a miserable day on stage.

[Kyle Kinane]

I just didn't do well. It wasn't. Yeah. I think I got drunk, I felt the pressure. I just didn't do well.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And that would. That would have been eight years. But so, yeah, so I did that. And then at Columbia, I saw a guy that I saw at the Zany's thing and I'm like, so you do comedy in town. This is pre Internet, or at least pre me knowing what the Internet.

[Chrissy]

Right.

[Kyle Kinane]

And he's like, oh, yeah, you go like the Chicago Reader. And here's a list of open mics. And you go to these, you sign up. And he told me what to, like, where to go. And so once I started going, I started. I went to open mics for like, I think three or four months. I just went and watched before trying because, yeah, I'm like, I'm not gonna be the funniest one here. But I always looked for who was the least funniest.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And then saw that they would come back week after week and I'm like, that's the, like, that's the most courageous person here. If that person can be that unfunny and come back every time, then I can do. I can do it too. Because I'm not competitive for the top. I just need to. To see that I might not be the worst.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

To get me to try something.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that. You're right. You're so right about that. Like, first of all, never done standup comedy. So I give all the. Like, I just think there's a lot of respect in going out there and walking that razor's edge every time. You just never know what you're going to get.

[Kyle Kinane]

There's not a lot of respect.

[Brian Green]

Well, you're getting some for me.

[Kyle Kinane]

I'll tell you.

[Brian Green]

But it's like that seven foot walk to the microphone. I mean, you just. Do you still get those, that anxiety, those nerves? Does it still feel like there's a rush going out there on stage?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, there's. I mean, especially when it's like, okay, here's new material, or I want to try and like, you get locked in like, oh, this kind of works. And you can get a little tone deaf to if it's really working or if like, oh, I have the cadence of a joke. I said it in the form of a joke and people laughed. But did they laugh because it was funny or they're laughing because, like, oh, here's the rhythm of the evening that we're in.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And so I can find myself going, oh, here's the hour that I have planned, and I'm kind of going through the motions on it. Everybody's laughing where they're supposed to, but I'm not feeling it. So then that's what I was like, ooh, we gotta change it up. We gotta start with a different joke. We gotta do that. And then you're still a little nervous and excited to. Yeah, it's still unpredictable. That's what's awesome about it. It's still unpredictable. I still bomb.

[Brian Green]

Do you really, though? Do you, like, really bomb?

[Chrissy]

I think a lot of comedians do that, you know, just to try stuff out. We were talking with Margaret Cho, and I know. I've heard Amy Schumer say she bombs, too, and does stuff around in la. And that's how you figure it out, you know?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, it doesn't feel good. And then if you are doing well, you get a little bit of a reputation. If you do well enough in comedy, like, oh, this person's funny, because people know you. But then you don't get to bomb. Yeah. Like, if nobody knows you and you bomb, they forgot about it. Oh, if somebody that they know. That's why Portland's great. Like, Portland, I just get to practice and, you know, eat it in front of people and then. But they know. They know what kind of show they came to.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, they understand that. Generally your batting average is pretty good. But it's fun to get out there and work on things. And sometimes things hit and sometimes things miss.

[Kyle Kinane]

If it's a. If it's a free show, I'll mess around. People paid to be there. I don't want to go goofing around when somebody paid some money to see some comedy.

[Brian Green]

But Kyle Canane does free shows in Portland. Let's get.

[Chrissy]

I know.

[Brian Green]

I want airline tickets. How many times a week are you doing? Are. Do you do sets?

[Kyle Kinane]

I mean, I. It's like, I was in town last weekend, so I had a spot Friday and Saturday, but there's spots, you know, 15 minutes, 20 minutes here, there.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Once I'm on the road so much that I'm not really clamoring for stage time here in Portland.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

So once or twice every couple weeks, I'd say if. But if I'm home, if I'm going to be home for a stretch, then I'm. I'm hanging around at the shows. I'm seeing if they need anybody.

[Brian Green]

Sure.

[Kyle Kinane]

But right now, I'm gone every weekend doing comedy. So when I come home for the few days between, I'm kind of. Kind of just chilling out yeah.

[Brian Green]

So that. This is a question I ask a lot of folks because I'm really generally curious is that, do you still. Do you enjoy the traveling part of it, or is it just like, that's part of the job? I'm just, I'm going in, I'm going to see a hotel room, I'm hanging out at the club and you know.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I wouldn't say. I wouldn't say enjoys the word, but I'm not bothered by, like, I know people are like, oh, you gotta go to the airport and fly every weekend. Like, I just, I don't know how you can do that. Like, I don't know how somebody sits in a car for at sometimes over two hours.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

A day. That's 10 hours.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Like, I don't know how you do that to go. And are you going to a job that you like?

[Chrissy]

Right.

[Brian Green]

Probably.

[Kyle Kinane]

I'm going to the thing. Yeah, I'm going to the thing. I'm going to the place where my childhood dream came true. So any little. Any little bump in the road to get me to do comedy, like, hey, remember what you're doing this weekend. Remember, Remember that you're going to go tell jokes for a living.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Maybe we're not so bothered about the middle seat right now.

[Brian Green]

Where do you go? And do you try and like, just a minutiae question. Do you schedule around the weekends or does that just happen to be when the shows are, you know, can get sold and if the weekends are the times to do the shows?

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I mean, that's how. So for a long time I would, I would travel like a band.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

I would try and be like, well, put me. I'll go to the Southeast for two weeks and then let me just do a different city every night like a band does.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And that guy, you know, I got to play a lot of weird, smaller towns and that's. I got built up a good, like, kind of grassroots following from doing that early on.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And then because, you know, early on, they'll try and book you in a comedy club. Well, comedy clubs are, you know, the 300, 250. 300 seats. 250 on the smaller side.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Some of these clubs, like 400 seats and you're doing five shows in there.

[Brian Green]

Geez.

[Chrissy]

Wow.

[Kyle Kinane]

So that's, you know, there's your 2,000 tickets.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

And that's. And if you. And if nobody knows you and you're selling 30 tickets or something, it doesn't feel real good when you look at 30 seats. In a 400 seat theater. Sounds. I was like, well, why don't I sell 30 tickets at some weird improv theater that I'll come through and do on a Tuesday night, Then Wednesday I'll do the same thing in another city three hours away, and so on and so on. Yeah. But I did that enough that, okay, now I got a following, which is cool. And I can actually sell these tickets at comedy clubs. And comedy clubs, traditionally, they're like Thursday through Saturday or Friday through Sunday now. Because that's when people get the babysitters and make that sense, their night out. Yeah. And comedy clubs have really, I think, come a long way from even the, you know, 20 some years I've been doing comedy. They're kind of like, they were like. They all kind of collectively up their game for the most part. And not the kind of like corny money laundering spots.

[Brian Green]

Right.

[Kyle Kinane]

Comedy clubs. Not to say I don't know what they're doing behind the doors in these offices, but they're, you know. Yeah, you get decent food, you get. You know, I went to see a buddy the other night and me and my friend were both commenting because in the darkness of the comedy club, you see a server holding a tray. Like it looks like, you know, 18 pint glasses full of it. And they're moving in the dark right in between and operating quietly. And it's crammed together. It's not like a restaurant where it's space. I'm like, that is. Those are like Green Berets to me. Or servers in comedy clubs. They're like Seal Team 6 to me.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I think you're right about that. It's like when I go to the comedy clubs, I also have taken note of how stealthy they are. The service staff are.

[Kyle Kinane]

Oh yeah, just SR71 swooping in with like, how much. How much weight is that? I've never, I never worked in a restaurant, so I never know. Like. And that, like, that's what gives me anxiety. I'll go on stage in front of 400 people with new jokes, it's fine. But don't make me bring drinks to them. Cause then you got drunks, like, oh, that one's mine. I'll help. And they don't realize it's balance and everything. I just panic. Even on stage, when you see it, I will panic. Cause I'll see the tray going through. I'm like, oh my God, please be careful. Like that. That takes my attention away from my own for sure. So tip those people. When you go to a comedy Club.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. God bless. I mean, amen. You for sure. I went. Who. Who was it that I went. I went up. Pete Davidson was, like, working on material, right? And so he went to this smaller club a little bit outside of Atlanta. Not the world's nicest place, right. But it was a place, and they had, you know, places packed. There's probably 200 people in the room, and they're. It's like person to person, back to back, butt to butt, nut to butt. And they have these 12, 13, 14 service members who are just, like, going through the crowd, taking orders, because that's where these. These clubs, in a lot of cases, make their money. They have to. They want to sell food, they want to sell drinks. And this girl has a tray of, I don't know, wine and something, and she spills it. And what I think would even in a restaurant, take away attention. Like, everybody would turn and go, oh, that happened. Yeah, this the way in which her and the staff just kind of got together real quick, cleaned it up, and were gone. It was almost as if no one even heard that. This glass just broke in the middle of the opener's set. And I was like, wow, these are really good. And then, you know, you think that people are, like, leaving a dollar with some change on the table, and I'm like, come on, guys. You at least ordered $20 worth of food. Give the guy a five. Give the girl a five. Please stop that.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, I think the gratuity is worked in as it should be. Built in for the. But those. Yeah, they're just. That brings me that.

[Brian Green]

Ugh.

[Kyle Kinane]

I hold my breath. I'm on stage. I hold my breath when I see the lights catching a full train. I mean, it's. Comedy. Clubs are restaurants. I work in a restaurant every weekend.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's true.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, that's what it is. I mean, we can try and make it seem like, oh, it's art, man. What a truth to the people. I am a component in a restaurant.

[Brian Green]

You were the entertainment. You were there to keep them there longer so they have them in a good spirit, so they drink and eat.

[Kyle Kinane]

That's one way to do that. I am there to move units.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kyle Kinane]

Move those moz sticks.

[Brian Green]

Just like anybody in a Polycule is just reminding everybody we're bringing it back to Polycule.

[Kyle Kinane]

Any comedian with an ego, just remember, you help sell chicken fingers. Calm down, Calm down. Tell me more about how you're a philosopher.

[Brian Green]

Oh, man, he's got the number. I think he knows what I'm talking about. I think he knows what I'm talking about. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Philosophize me some spinach dip while you're at it.

[Brian Green]

Conjure up somebody. Mustard.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Kylekinane.com is where you can go to tickets to his tour. There's also a link to his brand new special dirt nap on the 800 pound gorilla channel of YouTube. Kyle, personal favorite. I've really enjoyed your comedy for a while, and I think you're doing God's work out there.

[Kyle Kinane]

Thanks. That was my intent, was to do God's work.

[Brian Green]

Hey, I think we're just here to help.

[Kyle Kinane]

I mean, it's not obvious, but I am trying to spread the word of the Lord.

[Chrissy]

That's right.

[Brian Green]

Hey, real quick, because this is a question you should just answer real quick. What is your take on. On, like, God spirituality? Are you like, I believe in God kind of guy? Not believe in God real quick. No, real quick. Don't worry about it. I'm just kidding.

[Kyle Kinane]

Hey, Jesus is all right with me. Yeah. I don't know. I'm still. Yeah, I'm still in the fun stage of just taking mushrooms and there you go being, like, trying to be all right with whatever somebody else's interpretation is.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I.

[Kyle Kinane]

You know, I think it's gonna be. God's gonna turn out to be math, and I'm bad at math.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, me too.

[Kyle Kinane]

But much like math, I don't get it. But it's keeping things together, so. Right on. Somebody's putting these equations together to make sure the sky doesn't fall, so. Okay, then.

[Brian Green]

Right on. Keep on taking those mushrooms. Oh, and I. I read somewhere or heard somewhere, somewhere that you did ayahuasca, too.

[Kyle Kinane]

I did not.

[Brian Green]

You did not. Do I?

[Kyle Kinane]

No, I was tired. I was. I was talking with another podcast. Neil Brennan does. Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Okay.

[Kyle Kinane]

People are taking that and they're quitting the booze.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

Doing all kinds of stuff.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. That's God's work right there. Ayahuasca.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. I mean, I've. I've thrown up off of plenty of drinks. I don't need to do it again.

[Brian Green]

It's. And trust me, it's. Ayahuasca is not like a. Being drunk. It's not a bad hangover. It's like death a million times over, so isn't that the point?

[Kyle Kinane]

Have you. Have you done it?

[Brian Green]

Have you. Yeah.

[Kyle Kinane]

What did you. Did your life change for the.

[Brian Green]

Yes. I would share with you that it certainly did. And we got divorced. Yeah. That's why.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah. Actually. Oh, really?

[Brian Green]

Here's a funny thing. So I go to Go to do ayahuasca at this ceremony. It's funny to me, maybe not to my ex wife, but I go to this ceremony and you know, we're, we're there and we're supposed, we're doing this like it's a three day retreat. And so the first day, it's a lot of meditation and all this other stuff, getting ready for the ceremony, like with a shaman. And we go outside and the facilitator is like, listen, go outside, stare at the trees, connect with earth. Whatever you do, just. You don't, don't smoke cigarettes, don't talk to each other because we're trying to stay in this little bubble of our own headspace. But this guy who I know comes over and he looks at me and he goes, where's your fiance? And I said, oh, this is not for her. This is not her type of thing. Right? She's not coming to this. And he goes, interesting. And I said, why is that interesting? And he goes, well, I just don't think the two of you belong together. I think you should think about that on your journey. And I was like, oh, okay, thanks for the. I'm not even kidding. I still know this guy to this day. And in that journey, he was right. I mean, at the end of the day, the guy was right. He was right. But that ayahuasca experience just. It's hard to explain. And I know a lot of people will say this, it's hard to explain, but it's like you can see the molecules around here, you and how they all intertwine. And then you also die a thousand deaths. And that death and birth process just can give you a. I mean, if it doesn't change you, I, you know, you're a better man than I am, I guess, but it certainly changed me. For sure. But there is a lot of throwing up and yelling and screaming and, you know, sweating and.

[Kyle Kinane]

Which it could be any weekend, so why not have a transformative experience on top of it?

[Brian Green]

That's right. Listen, Zany's on Saturday, ayahuasca on Sunday, back in Portland by Monday you'll be.

[Kyle Kinane]

Listen, if I'm going to cry and myself, I better be a better person for it after the fact. That's right.

[Brian Green]

If I have to bring extra underwear for this journey, it better do something for me.

[Kyle Kinane]

And I just don't want to. That's. I'm not getting kicked out of IHOP for no reason. This time, you know.

[Brian Green]

Go. Can I? Thank you so much for joining us here.

[Kyle Kinane]

Thank you guys. It was a good time.

[Brian Green]

You know, we say this a lot and. But we actually mean it this time. I would love to have you back because. Yeah, I would love to have you back. I think there's lots more to talk about. We could have fun. So will you.

[Kyle Kinane]

We just got to the ayahuasca thing.

[Brian Green]

It's an important part, so we would love to have you back, and I will make sure that that happens. Happens. If you're agreeable to it.

[Kyle Kinane]

I would love to. I. I owe. I. I'm years overdue for an Atlanta visit.

[Brian Green]

Oh, and if you come to Atlanta, come on in. We'll slide up. Yeah. Do you. Have you been to Atlanta recently or on this tour or. No, no, no.

[Kyle Kinane]

I'm. It's just if for no reason. Atlanta's always great. It just didn't. Didn't put together on this. This year's bookings.

[Chrissy]

All right, nice.

[Kyle Kinane]

I was playing Variety Playhouses where I would play Variety.

[Brian Green]

Right. That's a great room.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, Love it.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's a great room. Down a little.

[Kyle Kinane]

Five points. But I'll be. I'm. I'm long overdue, and I love Atlanta, so.

[Christina]

Nice.

[Chrissy]

We'll come back in when you come.

[Brian Green]

I'll buy you dinner, Ayahuasca, and you can come in the studio and hang out with us. If you're gonna throw up, throw up with a friend. You know what I'm saying?

[Kyle Kinane]

Let's roll the cameras. You know, let's make it count. If you're not getting the. If you're not getting the views on it, why are you even doing it?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, content.

[Brian Green]

Well, I see these videos on Instagram now of people doing the ayahuasca ceremony, like down in Costa Rica or, you know where, Columbia, wherever they are. And it's like, you know, a hundred white people, hippies from the United States, all freaking out on a back porch somewhere, and of course, they're filming it for Instagram. It's like Jesus.

[Kyle Kinane]

Yeah, yeah. Nothing says ego death like subscribe.

[Brian Green]

That's right. Yeah. So thanks, Kyle. We appreciate it. It. Thank you for joining us today.

[Kyle Kinane]

Thank you, guys.

[Brian Green]

What?

[Christina]

Oh, hi, it's Christina again, here to remind you to go to tcbpodcast.com for all things audio, video, and TCBDO. Give us a follow on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTokcbpodcast. And guess what? We have a new phone number. I know what you're thinking, but I promise this is the last TCB phone number you will ever have to remember. So call us and leave us a voicemail or text us at 212-4333, TCB. Once more for the people in the back. That's 212-4333, TCB. Oh, and check out our YouTube channel at YouTube.com thecommercialbreak. That's all for now. Let's listen to our sponsors and get back to the show.

[Brian Green]

Well, there you have it. We got our answer on the Polycules from. From Kyle. He says yay to polycule, but not for him. That's what it is. And I say yay. That's like double yay. Kyle stands on it. Not for me. I'm too small of a person to get involved in such a big situation. You know what I'm saying? I got my hands full over here. What am I gonna do? Like, I need to get. Be getting more people pregnant. Speaking of pregnancy, hear all these people getting pregnancy pregnant on WeGovy.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, I did those Olympics.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I'm concerned for a few of my friends. I mean, I don't know, but I don't know if babies in the mix. I don't know if baby's the thing they want to do. But you never know. You might. You might pop out a wegovy kid, and that's. That's something we should all pay attention to. As far as I'm. I never asked Kyle about Wegovy, which I'm. Or Ozempic, which I meant to ask him about. Why? I don't know, but I just felt like it. Kyle's looking slim and trim in his new special. He looks good. Like, he looks, you know, know, healthy. And he has got that beard. I like the beard. I think the beard does him good.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he's got, like, the Portland look going on.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I guess when you live in Portland, it kind of soaks into you, huh? I think it's hard to live in a place like Portland and not let it rub off on you a little bit.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

It's like living in San Francisco or New York or Miami. If you live in Miami, you're gonna get. You're gonna feel a little Latino or Latina when you leave. Right. If you're living in New York, you're gonna have a little bit of an edge. You live in Chicago, you. All of a sudden, you're eating hot dogs and. And pizza. That's way too big. If you live in Portland, you know, you get a little crunchy. Yeah. And I'm not opposed to that. I mean, as. As we discuss ayahuasca and Portland Go like peanut butter and jelly. You know what I'm saying? I think if Kyle really wants to do it, he can probably find a. Find someone who can conjure him up some ayahuasca. So let me repeat, just for those of you who have not heard it yet or who are not paying attention when I said it. Pay attention, class. Let's go. KyleKanane.com is where you find out more information about all of his show dates that are coming up. And he's got quite a few going. May and June, you can go to 800 pound gorilla, the channel on YouTube, watch lots of great comedy. But right there, right in the front, right now is his brand new special called Dirt Nap. It is well worth the hour and 12 minutes, I promise you. It's hilarious. I know I said this to him, but I got to tell the audience one more time. You got to watch the 12 minutes, fast and furious. And then. And then he goes in on his mom and it's just, it's hilarious. You got to watch that. And then file Kyle on Instagram and all that good stuff. You can. By the way, you can watch special and find all that other information on his website, Kyle Canane.com. i really appreciate that he came in here last minute.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, it was a lot of fun.

[Brian Green]

And what a great guy. And put him on the back list. He's coming back.

[Chrissy]

He's coming back.

[Brian Green]

Now you'll know who we don't enjoy interviewing when we don't ask them to come back. Or you can go back and listen and figure out who we didn't enjoy interviewing. No, I'm kidding. We enjoyed.

[Chrissy]

We loved everybody, for sure. I've had fun at all of them.

[Brian Green]

I have. In my own little way. Each of them has been an adventure in and of itself.

[Chrissy]

Exactly.

[Brian Green]

You know what I'm saying? You never do know. You never do know.

[Chrissy]

A lot of times they're one way on stage and then, you know, interviewing them may be a little different than you thought, but that's good.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. As Neil Brennan said in his new Netflix special, which I hope you've watched by now, but if you have and go watch it, Neil Brennan said, you don't want Kevin Hart to be humble. You don't want your basketball stars to be, you know, choir boys. That's not. That's not what they're built for. They're built for speed and destruction and. Or comedy, as it turns out, you know, or acting or whatever it is. So there you go.

[Chrissy]

It's been fun.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. It's been fun. So Kyle canane.com. he's on the back list. Let's do this. Let's tell the audience how they can find out more information about us. Which is more important. Tcb podcast dot com. That's where you go. You find out more information about the show. All of our tour dates are up there too. All of them. Every one of them. If there's a tour date in the future, it's going to be on the website. Just know that you can watch all the video, you can listen to all the audio or tcb. Tcbdo, as Christina likes to say. You can hit the contact us button for your free TCB sticker. All you got to do is hit the contact us button. Drop down menu. I want my sticker. Give us your address away. It will go. You'll have it in a couple of weeks or months or however long it takes to get to you. We want you on the show to talk to us. Please dial 212-4333 TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Text us, let us know what you want to talk about. Ask tcb. You need our advice face you have a question, comment, concern, whatever it is. If you want to be on the show, we'll get you on the show. But you gotta text me or text somebody and let them know. Let them know what you want. Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on tick tock and YouTube.com what? Chrissy, the commercial break, all of our interviews up there and selected episodes. We sure do hope you give us a subscribe. All right, Chrissy. I know that's all I can do for today.

[Chrissy]

I think so.

[Brian Green]

But I'll tell you that I love you.

[Kyle Kinane]

I love you.

[Brian Green]

I'll say best to you, best to you. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. And that includes Kyle Kanane. Much appreciated. Until next time. We always say, we do say we must say good Goodbye, Sam.