← The Commercial Break
The Commercial Break
Trust Paris & Patty!
00:57:19
Ah, the early Bryan & Krissy years! We revisit some past St. Patty's day parties and discuss the history of Olympians getting it in. Thank you to our listeners <3 Bryan shouts out our listeners Grocery delivery We’ve got another Bryan story! The St. Patty’s Yuengling Party of the Century Bryan saves the day Savannah St. Patrick’s day Mystery helicopters! The Atlanta Olympics No sex allowed? There will be sex in the city of love! Bryan should have been an olympian LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us 212.433.3TCB text or leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Watch for Live Show info at www.tcbpodcast.com Hosts Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Christina A. Producer: Gustavo B. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Transcript256 lines
- [00:00]
Chrissy
Being a slut sounds so fun.
- [00:02]
Brian
Go sluts.
- [00:03]
Chrissy
I have every ambition of a slut with none of the follow through. Whenever it gets hot and heavy, I go, well, I could just sleep. I love to sleep. I'm a sleepy slut. My pillow doesn't have bad breath. My blanket doesn't have daddy issues. My sheets aren't going to try to choke me. But being a slut sounds fun. Going into town, tearing everything up, walking away in slow motion on a suit city explodes and my crotch is on fire. But I'm too tired. Does anybody want to have a sexy nap? Sexy nap.
- [00:38]
Brian
On this episode of the commercial break, out of some nobility, like Brian has some man nobility, right? I go, it's time to get Chrissy to safety. I go from Clark Kent into Superman and I'm like, I must get her to high ground before the tide sets in the of yingling and whiskey. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this wonderful show, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you, Brian, and best of you out there in the podcast universe. Hey, speaking of podcast universe, I just wanted to shout out to a couple of our listeners who have been writing in diligently like homework, homework we've assigned them and they've responded accordingly. Most of the class is failing, but there are a few of you ass kissers out there, teachers, pets, if you will, that are are dialing in. And I, I love it. I love to see it. I woke up the other morning and I saw a slew of text messages and I was like, oh, what did I say now? So we have this phone after years of complicated machinery, software installing phone lines into the floor, right? I thought, well, there's a new fangled thing called a cell phone. I should pro one of those. Like, who doesn't have a burner phone? It's 2024, right? So I got a burner phone for the studio. Very nice burner phone, by the way. Yeah. Am I gonna have to sell this, actually pay for a new microphone? So I got this burner phone for 212-4333. TCB goes right to this phone and then one of us will check it. One of us here at the studio. There's other people that check the text messages too that work with the show. Don't worry, your information's not going anywhere. Crazy. But the other morning I walked in just to, just to fiddle Around. It was the weekend and I, you know, you press your phone to see if you have any messages.
- [02:37]
Kristen
Yes.
- [02:37]
Brian
And then I saw all these messages and I was like, oh, shit. What did I say? That's what stresses me out. Mondays and this phone. Yeah, because there are a few people who are not afraid to call us out and have done so on a number of occasions, so.
- [02:52]
Kristen
But I welcome that.
- [02:53]
Brian
Yeah, sure, I'll talk about it. As long as it's not. As long as it's not making me look bad, I'll talk about it. It makes the show look bad. Ah, whatever. Who cares? But as my wife points out, the show is you partly Brian. You know that. Did you realize that I said, hey, listen, I'm not splitting hairs with you, babe. All right, so I want to shout out to our good friend Kaden. Kaden has been writing in for the last couple of weeks. Sounds. Sounds really nice. Like a nice guy. Yeah. And Kaden had lots of nice things to say to the show. I just want to read, if you don't mind, one of the text messages he sent me.
- [03:26]
Kristen
Go right ahead.
- [03:28]
Brian
He said, I know I'm just one of tens of listeners that you. That you guys have. I love you and Chrissy's camaraderie so much. I love the Mountain Monster episodes. Honestly, it's a toss up between Frankie and Mountain Monsters, but I have family that are a thousand percent bumpkin, so I can relate too. Since you guys have done Mountain Monster episodes. I've had friends over and we listen to you guys and we rave about the Chuck, Buck, Huck and Fuck episodes. One of the times recently, we actually had a Mountain Monsters watching party and we drank 40 to 50 beers listening to you guys. I'm not even kidding. I really want to see you guys succeed in the podcast ethos and looking forward to how much you grow. Much love, Kaden. Much love to you, Kaden. That's all I gotta say. And listen, we're also rooting for ourselves in the podcast ethos. We're also hoping we see some success, but you know, it's only taken five more years and we're going to get there, I'm sure of it.
- [04:18]
Kristen
And we also have bumpkin relatives somewhere down the line.
- [04:21]
Brian
We absolutely do. Say hello to our good friend Darren, who was recently listening to the Scuzzy Guy episode. Hey, Darren. Please tell Brian and Chrissy that the Scuzzy Guy's special episode is comedy gold. I've enjoyed the interview episodes, but listening to Brian tell a long story is always a perfect episode.
- [04:40]
Kristen
Was that the Chuck? What is that the chocolate Yuckles?
- [04:43]
Brian
Yeah, that is the Yuckles. I think that was the first episode that we did of that guy. What was his name? Yaz or John or whatever. Zahn or whatever his name is. The guy that's like, super down on his. All right. Actually, I feel like when I look at Jan or Zahn or whatever his name is, I feel like I'm seeing me five years from now up on some podcast conference stage. It took me five years to make this podcast, and now I'm giving it away for free. We want to say hi to our good friend Braden, who listens with his girlfriend, Allison. Allison loves you guys. We've been so confused at how many children you have.
- [05:24]
Kristen
So are we.
- [05:25]
Brian
Yeah, so somebody here wrote back. They said, first, thanks so much for listening to the show, and thank you for the kind words. The number of. The number of children Brian has is a closely guarded TCV secret, but it's safe to say he has more than 1, less than 5, obviously not 23, 16, or 11. So I'll address this right now. And then he also says that our YouTube channel is a little confusing. So let me address both. To which I completely agree. Completely agree. So YouTube. Let me address the first one. Let me address the last one first. Okay, so YouTube, recently, they invited us, like a lot of other podcasts. They invited us as a noted podcast, mean we noted that we were a podcast. They invited us to import our RSS feed, just like you would listen to us on any other podcast channel like Apple or Spotify, Google, which is going away, or, you know, cast, whatever. There's so many of them out there, just like you would listen on any of those players. YouTube is now allowing you to just import your show, just like we do on every other player to YouTube. But what that does is it creates its own video with a static image, and then you listen to it. And what's happening is those videos are getting mixed up with the actual videos, the videos that we record here in the studio. That's what's going on. So now it just looks like a big mishmash. And it's hard to tell which videos are videos and which videos are audio. So what I did was I turned off the RSS feed just to deconfuse it, because he's not the first person to say something about this. And my wife actually has said something about this, too. Astrid, who is like, quite frankly, 75% of why this show even gets on air at all. And she was Also very confused by it. I don't understand. Why are you doing this? It looks ridiculous. And I was like, okay, so we had a big tit for tat.
- [07:14]
Kristen
Why is YouTube doing that? Because I get it that maybe a lot of people listen through YouTube, but don't you just automatically think video, you know, know, moving video?
- [07:24]
Brian
You do what was happening previously to. During the pandemic. Shows like ours would come on, and then we would start uploading our. Our audio. We would make a video out of the audio. You just put an image, right? Say our cover photo. We just put an image, and then you upload a file with the audio in it. And that's how millions and millions and millions of people were getting podcasts where they were listening through YouTube. Some people think YouTube is, like the second or third largest podcast player out there, just the audio. So YouTube, in an effort to invite the podcast world onto YouTube, said, let's make it easy for you. You don't have to do anything. Just import your RSS feed. As soon as you release an episode, we'll update it. Blah, diddy, blah, diddy, blah. It's very confusing. And I love YouTube, but that is not. I don't want to do that because I want people to see us in all our glory, our beautiful faces, our faces for radio.
- [08:19]
Kristen
I think I might like the rss.
- [08:21]
Brian
I know you do. Chrissy would rather us do this show in dark, actually. And I know why. Because of me. She's like, I don't want to be associated with that guy. So listen, I turned off the RSS feed, and we'll figure out a way to fix it. We'll figure out some. Okay, we'll tape it together like we do everything else.
- [08:41]
Kristen
Get the electrical tape.
- [08:42]
Brian
Yeah. We'll get some super glue, and we'll fix it. But for right now, you don't have to worry about it because it's off. So that's first. Secondly, yes, I have a lot of children. Yes, I'm constantly making a joke. It started off as a joke, and now it continues to go. And so let's just keep rolling with it. Why not? There also is all. There is a little bit of me that gets a bit concerned about overzealous listeners. If you don't. If you don't mind. You know, people, like, could be driving down the street, and you'll see a sticker on, bumper sticker on the back, and it'll be like, stick figures.
- [09:15]
Kristen
Yes, the family.
- [09:16]
Brian
The family. Yeah. And then some of them, you put the names below, and I'M like, what in the fuck are you doing? Like your information is already not out there in the world enough. Now you're publicly and showing people how many children you have, what ages they are and their names. It's kind of silly to me. I mean, I guess maybe there's a point to it. I don't know what that point is, but it's kind of silly to me. And so at first it was kind of like, well, I don't want to broadcast about my, my children. I made that decision a long time ago. Like that's their life. I don't need to be right, you know, sharing their names and their information and all that stuff. But now it's just so funny watching everybody. Guess this is not the first time we've had this question. We've had it a lot actually. So just know my 12 to 22 children are doing just fine. And soon I will let you know exactly how many children I have. The last episode of the commercial break. Yeah, when they turn 27, I'll let you know how many of them I have. So stay tuned. That's 1,622,000 more episodes of the commercial break. You asked for it, you got it. So are wonderful. There's so many more wonderful listeners that I want to shout out. I don't have time for, for all of them. I had someone that mentioned they also love Walmart sweatpants. Oh, right, you remember we were talking about comfortable ones. Yeah. All right. So Jessica says, hey Brian, since you shared about your ultra comfortable sweatpants from Walmart, I'll share with you the secret of their leggings. They are ridiculous, ridiculously soft and comfy and they're seven between $8 and $13. They have solids and patterns. Not sure if they have them for men, but trust me, you need to get Astro to pair of these today. Chrissy, Tina and Brian's mom will all want some too. I'm not sponsored by Walmart. Picks of the couple of the patterns, the best leggings. That's Jessica. She sent those in some interesting patterns. Oh yeah, she sent me a picture.
- [11:09]
Kristen
She's got some space stuff, some tied up leggings.
- [11:13]
Brian
Leggings. What are we all going to twang today? We all got a twang. What happened? It's like our southern accents all of a sudden just fell on the show.
- [11:23]
Kristen
Bumpkin. Yeah, just came out.
- [11:25]
Brian
Well, I'm almost so broke I'm about to start putting old cars in my front lawn and selling off the spare parts. It's true story a True story. I'm out back wondering what I could sell. I'm like, well there's blue. Oh, she's not going to sell. No, there's a lot of kids. I recently heard about some lady trying to. Did you hear this story about the lady outside of a CVS trying to sell her kid for $500? Oh my God, yes. And then there was another story. I mean these are terrible stories, right? Luckily the kid was taken by, I don't know, say luckily, but taken by defects. Everything turned out okay. The kid did not get kidnapped or sold, but because the person who she offered to sell the kid to obviously went straight in and was like, that lady's trying to sell a child out there. Some other dude offered a hundred thousand dollars for some ladies kid at a Walmart or something. I'm telling you that Walmart, their, their pants may be comfy. I don't know what's going on in that parking lot. Walmart, go ahead, sell your kids here. Walmart, we have delivery. Your groceries will be there soon, we promise. Let me tell you about Walmart grocery delivery. One time we had a grocery. This is over the pandemic. One time we had a grocery delivery. This is not targeted at Walmart. This is targeted at this specific human being. So we, we order Walmart groceries. Yeah, right, Like a lot of people did all ordering groceries. No one went to the grocery store for, for a minute there. So we order groceries, you know, non contact. Leave it out in the driveway while it's raining, you know, please make a circle 15ft around the groceries with Lysol. You know what I'm saying? Exactly. We were all spraying down our groceries. Yes. Yeah, I'm probably going to die of some chemical related cancer from all that shit I was putting all over my body. But anyway, so, so we do this non contact delivery, the whole nine yards. So we're waiting and we're waiting and we're waiting. It's supposed to be here by five, let's say five o', clock. It's getting up on nine o', clock, it's dark outside. You know, the Walmart closes at 11. So we were like, wow, when's the one of the groceries coming? We hope they come today because we were really hungry, right? And so finally they come like 10 o' clock at night. It has been raining all day long, Chrissy. Raining all day long. The person I didn't see if it was a guy or a girl comes up, drops the groceries off as prescribed, then gets in their car, then does not one not two, but three 360 degree drives through my grass in order to get the proper position to get out onto the road. It was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever seen in my entire life. I was so pissed. First of all, I don't have grass, so you're ruining what little grass I have. Second of all, anytime it rains, just a mud pit back there. Third of all, I really don't care if you got to make yourself. If, if you. I'd rather you be safe than me have grass, right? So it's a very busy road I live on. So if you got to be safe, you got to turn yourself forward so you don't have to back out on the busy road. I get that part. But you could have done that in the first circle. You didn't need the second in the third circle. Mother fucker. I was on that phone with that Walmart lickety split. And you know what they did. Not a thing.
- [14:35]
Kristen
Right, well, you were at the mercy of just having somebody make a delivery.
- [14:40]
Brian
Yeah, listen, I just told them, I said, hey, you know, I understand the guy wants a guy or girl wants to be safe, but could you please, next time could you put a note on our account? Please don't drive three times through the grass. I mean, literally, the guy was doing three sixties in my grass. And I thought for a second, I thought, oh, here we go. I'm. I'm a part of one of these crazy videos. You know, I actually have a video of it because I was like, okay, here we go. I'm gonna, I'm gonna be one. I'm going, going viral. And no, I didn't go viral. I don't even think I posted it. But anyway, so she says these leggings are more comfortable than even the sweatpants, which I find hard to believe because those sweatpants have now been washed at least three times. And I'm telling you what, they're still maintaining, okay? They're maintained.
- [15:22]
Kristen
That is a consideration.
- [15:23]
Brian
They are maintained. Now they got some spots and stains because I bought the white pants, of course, and I'm a dumbass. I spill everything all over myself. I have this coffee cup, like this lovely commercial break coffee cup. The tumbler, right?
- [15:35]
Kristen
Oh, I love those, yo.
- [15:36]
Brian
That's. It's so. They're so good. And they keep everything cold. Me too. I go nowhere without my commercial break tumbler. And by the way, I've never been asked once what the commercial break is. Never that once.
- [15:51]
Kristen
Oh my God, I almost spit out my water.
- [15:55]
Brian
So I got that commercial Break tumbler. And I'm. And what I do is, you know, if the coffee. I like a lot of cream in my coffee. So if it sits there for a couple of minutes, got to shake it up just to make sure that you don't get any, like, weird, clumpy cream on the top of it, right? And so I shake it up, but there's always just a little bit of coffee left on the lid. You know what I'm saying? So if you walk anywhere in my house or look on any of my clothing, there's just little, tiny, little coffee spots everywhere, because I shake that damn thing so hard, the coffee goes flying everywhere. But it's not a lot of coffee, so I really don't notice it. So the other day, I'm walking around, I'm cleaning the house, and I go down the hallway, and I just notice splash pattern after splash pattern after splash pattern. Not really visible unless you're looking hard for it. But I was looking hard for it, and I was like, oh, my God, Brian, this is five years of you just splashing coffee all over the wall.
- [16:43]
Kristen
Meanwhile, the kids have left no marks.
- [16:45]
Brian
No. I yell at the kids anytime they look at the walls. I'm like, ah, no, no, no, no, no. Don't do that. I got a daughter, and she's one of those. She has not met a mess that she doesn't like. She has not met a mess that she can't make messier. You know what I'm saying? That's just her style that she just love. She will literally take a napkin, wipe her mouth off, and then throw it on the floor in the middle of the house. And I'm like, young lady, is that where the trash goes? And this is a response. Yes. I'm like, oh, okay. All right, then. Good luck getting him to clean up anything. Why, yes, it is. Thanks for asking, dad. You can now pick it up if you like to. That's where I put it if you need it somewhere else. Her perspective is everything. She. And I love it. I love it. I love that she's so independent. Yes. She has such a. Like, a fighting spirit. Yes, she does. Yeah. So anyways, I go. I have to go around the house with that Mr. Magic Eraser thing. Just scraping up my own coffee.
- [17:40]
Kristen
And, like, how does that thing work? It. Because it really does work.
- [17:43]
Brian
I'll tell you how it works. Would you like to know? It is extremely fine sandpaper.
- [17:50]
Kristen
Okay, that makes sense.
- [17:52]
Brian
So what it does is it doesn't really clean more as it does take off the Very top of the paint.
- [17:58]
Kristen
Like, you know, hundreds that it does come off.
- [18:01]
Brian
Yeah.
- [18:01]
Kristen
But I still. I was like, how does it just.
- [18:04]
Brian
It just works. Yeah, it just does. It's like very fine sandpaper.
- [18:08]
Kristen
Makes a lot of sense.
- [18:08]
Brian
Yeah. And so when you scrape it on a wall or something that's got paint, it doesn't take off all the paint. It just takes off just like a millionth of a millimeter of that paint, but enough of it to make the stain go away. This is Mr. Wizards World with Brian.
- [18:26]
Kristen
Let's go out to the yard and explode.
- [18:28]
Brian
Hey, listen. No, because I had a friend that got charged for that.
- [18:34]
Kristen
I know.
- [18:35]
Brian
Yeah, yeah, I remember that. That cured our woes. But he was also trying to, like, destroy a piece of heavy equipment. Yeah. When you're trying to, like, you know, bomb something, when you're actually trying to bomb something, that's a different story. Okay, so what I'd like to do right now, Chrissy, is I'd like to take a break. And when we come back, do I have a story for you.
- [18:55]
Kristen
Oh, okay.
- [18:56]
Brian
Straight from the headlines. I can't wait to discuss it because it's something I've been wondering about for a very, very long time. And finally we have some people making sense at the top. Somebody out there in the world is making sense.
- [19:09]
Kristen
Finally.
- [19:09]
Brian
Finally. And I'd like to discuss this with you when we get back.
- [19:12]
Kristen
Let's do it.
- [19:13]
Brian
We'll be back.
- [19:15]
Christina
What? Oh, hi, it's Christina again here to remind you to go to tcbpodcast.com for all things audio, video and TC, BDO. Give us a follow on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok @TCB podcast. And guess what? We have a new phone number. I know what you're thinking, but I promise this is the last he's phone number you will ever have to remember. So call us and leave us a voicemail or text us at 212-4333TCB. Once more for the people in the back. That's 212-4333TCB. Oh, and check out our YouTube channel at YouTube.com thecommercial break. That's all for now. Let's listen to our sponsors and get back to the show.
- [20:07]
Brian
All right. Ever since I heard this story in 1995, 4 or 5. Let me back up a little bit.
- [20:17]
Kristen
Okay.
- [20:17]
Brian
It's gonna be one of those Brian stories. So get your cup of coffee, kids.
- [20:19]
Kristen
Don't shake it, though.
- [20:20]
Brian
Don't shake it because it's gonna get, you know, have that magic eraser for two days. So there's helicopters flying over the house.
- [20:28]
Kristen
I know.
- [20:28]
Brian
And we think, we just thought we just heard gunshots. Not in this neighborhood. I better go check on Blue maybe. Blue? That dog is crazy. I'll tell you that story. Different episode. Remind me to tell you about the same. By the way, happy belated St. Patrick's Day.
- [20:46]
Kristen
Now, happy St. Patrick's Day.
- [20:47]
Brian
Remind me to tell you the story about the St. Patrick's Day party we had here for birthdays. Birthday. St. Patrick's Day party.
- [20:53]
Christina
Okay.
- [20:53]
Brian
Yeah. Don't worry, you weren't invited. You wouldn't have liked it anyway. So there you go. All right.
- [21:00]
Kristen
Speaking about St. Patrick's Day, I was, you know, musing on the years of celebrating St. Patrick's Day over the years.
- [21:08]
Brian
Yes.
- [21:08]
Kristen
You know, and as a kid, it's fun. And you know, you pinching people if they're not wearing green.
- [21:13]
Brian
Yeah. The people. That's me. I mighty.
- [21:14]
Kristen
The people with the green eyes were just automatically grandfathered into that.
- [21:19]
Brian
They just. They win. They're Irish. Yeah. And so.
- [21:23]
Kristen
Or they just had great eyes. But I was thinking about the different parties. I mean, you and I attended that one when I was worked at the radio station. So huge, huge party blowout. Everybody. I mean, it was crazy.
- [21:37]
Brian
I can't even begin to explain how insane this party was. I have pictures and I don't think one time both of my eyes were looking in the same direction. I'm being dead serious about this.
- [21:50]
Kristen
I remember getting there early because it was my client that was sponsoring it.
- [21:54]
Brian
Yingling.
- [21:55]
Kristen
Yingling. And. Yeah, and I mean, that's about what I remember is getting there and then the rest of it's a blur.
- [22:01]
Brian
It was absolute insanity. So I'll tell a little bit of this story. So I think the year was. Let me say it's 2009. 2008. No. 2008. Yeah. Seven or eight. Yeah. And yingling, the beer company, the great beer company from up in the northeast. Boston. Right. Are they from Massachusetts or Maine? Yeah, somewhere.
- [22:21]
Kristen
Okay.
- [22:22]
Brian
There's somewhere up in there.
- [22:23]
Kristen
It's not Maine.
- [22:24]
Brian
It's not Maine.
- [22:24]
Kristen
Okay.
- [22:25]
Brian
In the eastern half of the United States. Yingling has a brewery.
- [22:29]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [22:31]
Brian
Okay, so Yingling has a brewery and they are going to bring their beer down to Atlanta for the very first time in their 125 year history.
- [22:41]
Kristen
Everybody was so excited.
- [22:42]
Brian
Everyone was pumped about this because everyone who had ever been to the northeast and had a Yingling fell in love with Yingling. Right.
- [22:48]
Kristen
It is a good Beer.
- [22:48]
Brian
Yeah, it is good beer. So the moratorium has been lifted.
- [22:52]
Kristen
Yingling and I get the client, and.
- [22:54]
Brian
She gets the client.
- [22:55]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [22:55]
Brian
On behalf of the radio station. And their first big splash into the Atlanta is going to be sponsoring. Well, north of Atlanta. We're talking 40 miles north of Atlanta. They're going to be sponsoring a St. Patrick's Day party that spans three different parking lots and a huge, huge bar. And they have. It's raining, so there are tents everywhere. It's cold, so they have heaters out there. I mean, these guys did it up, right? This is a big fucking party.
- [23:24]
Kristen
Party, yeah. It was a big deal.
- [23:26]
Brian
We knew this was going to be the party of the century. How did we know that? We rented hotel rooms.
- [23:31]
Kristen
We did.
- [23:33]
Brian
In one of the. One of the parking lots that they used was a hotel parking lot. Part of a hotel parking lot. And we rented room. A room in that parking lot. I'll never forget. Yeah. So we get there at whatever time we go throw our bags into the hotel, check in into the hotel room, walk on over.
- [23:52]
Kristen
I forgot about the hotel.
- [23:56]
Brian
We walk on over, we get in one of those tents, and instantaneously, it's shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, beer, beer, beer, shot, shot, shot. Not the regular sized beers. Those beers that are like, you know, the yard beers. They're making yard yinglings. Okay.
- [24:12]
Kristen
We're shooting whiskey. Like Irish whiskey.
- [24:15]
Brian
We're shooting whiskey. They have three different bands playing at the same time. They were shooting Irish whiskey. Who does that? No one. That is a recipe for puke apocalypse. I mean, that is just gross. We probably have no food because the only thing we ever put in our bellies was beer until after three in the morning.
- [24:32]
Kristen
Yes.
- [24:34]
Brian
And they have three different bands playing in three different little areas. Okay, so there are other people at the radio station that are there also, and we're all having a good time and laughing it up and yucking it up and listening to the music. And there's one guy that's playing in this one particular tent. Like the least populated tent has one guy in the corner playing. But I know the guy, right? And I'm like, oh, I know that guy. That's a guy. I know that dude. He's. He's an old buddy of mine. You know, let me go up there and I'll tell him to sing some song. This guy put on a string of terribly depressing music. I mean, he just went on. It was like, you know, nothing compares to you into, you know, I don't know, into old Smokey Robinson Sad songs into country music. I mean, this guy was depressing the entire place. We were like, Jesus Christ.
- [25:21]
Kristen
Hence, the least populated.
- [25:23]
Brian
Yes. But luckily, one of the people I was with knew exactly the cure for this, and that was to throw up directly. They had, like, these tables, like these bar tables. These, you know, rented. Rent. A bar table. Yeah, yeah, those. You know, the ones that kind of go up to your chest. And this guy had just been drinking like we had. But as this music is playing, I'll never forget what he says to me. He looks at me. We're all standing around this table. There's like three or four of us. He looks at me and he goes, this is fucking depressing. And I was like, what? And he goes, fucking music. It's making me cry. You've seen the videos. You've all seen the videos on YouTube of the guys are just sitting there, and then all of a sudden the puke just starts rolling out their mouth and they're just trying to wipe it off like nothing happened.
- [26:10]
Kristen
Oh, God.
- [26:10]
Brian
This puke just goes right across the table, down onto the floor. Without a bit of irony, without a bit of irony, this guy says, I need a glass of water. I'll be right back. And we're all left there with depressing music and puke on the table. It was gross. This party just got crazier and crazier. And it ended in a hotel room where the ultimate craziness happened. Now, let me explain. Or with a good friend of ours, a rather popular radio disc jockey that. That was here, a lovely woman, and I won't mention names because I don't know that she wants this story, but I'm just gonna. I'm just gonna share part of this story, by the way. And so. So it's probably 2 or 3 in the morning, and I think the. The party probably goes till 4. I'm gonna say probably wrapping up at 3:30 or 4, something like that. It's getting late and there are still plenty of people there, and everyone is just as drunk as they can be. That he wasn't the first. First person to puke at that party, and he certainly wasn't the last.
- [27:09]
Kristen
Oh, yeah, there were multiple.
- [27:10]
Brian
And the later it got, the crazier it got. Like the bartenders are now drunk, the waitresses stopped coming around, you know, now they're drinking with everybody. It's all debauchery. It's like society just fell apart inside of this, right? It's being held together by some fabric of trust that no one's going to murder anybody else. Yeah. And these huge tents. We're all just trusting. I think the bartenders are trusting someone's going to pay their tab. I think the waitresses are trusting they'll still have a job in the morning. And I'm trusting that it's just going to take me at 15 yards to the hotel. That's all I got to do.
- [27:43]
Kristen
Oh, I guarantee that next day, there had to be plenty of people that had to come back for their credit card.
- [27:48]
Brian
Oh, yeah. I mean, if you're a bartender, you know, if you know, you know, right? There's. You oftentimes have many credit cards at the end of the night. You just know they're coming back tomorrow, right? So at some point, I look over and I see Chrissy, and she is like. She's got. Her head is almost on one of these bar tables. It's just swaying back and forth. And I'm like, some. Out of some nobility, like, Brian has some man nobility, right? I go, it's time to get Chrissy to safety. I go from Clark Kent into Superman. And I'm like, I must get her to high ground before the tide sets in. The tide of yingling and whiskey. So I grabbed Chrissy and I'm like, hey, you gotta go back to the hotel. I'm taking it over there. And you said to me, I think I'm gonna go home. And I was like, home? Where are you gonna go? How are you gonna get there? I'll drive. You'll drive, my ass. So I walk Chrissy across the parking lot, you know, and I go upstairs, I open the door, and I literally, literally drop her on the bed. I'm like, drop her on the bed. Face first, fully clothed, shoes on.
- [28:59]
Kristen
Oh, yeah, there were two queen beds. And yeah, he deposited me on one.
- [29:03]
Brian
But I was like, the party's not over yet. I can still hear them. I can still hear them talking today. Are you okay? Are you okay? That's what I said. Are you okay? You didn't respond. And I was like, ah, she's fine.
- [29:15]
Kristen
Drive on.
- [29:16]
Brian
I go back to the party, and we wrapped it up. And Chrissy, when I got back to the hotel room with our friend who was. Who was coming into the hotel room with us when the. When the two of us got back in there, we were literally, like, putting our hand in front of your face to see if you were still breathing. We were concerned because you hadn't moved, not one single hair. You had not moved. You were done for. You were toasted. You were fried. It Was unbelievable. I mean, we've seen each other in a lot of states of disarray, but this was one of the ones where I got concerned. I was like, oh, did she drink too much? She's gonna be hurting in the morning.
- [29:52]
Kristen
And I was.
- [29:53]
Brian
And you were hurting in the morning. But. But didn't we all go out to breakfast the next morning?
- [29:58]
Kristen
We had to check out and go get our credit cards. I know that parking lot was crazy. I just. Oh, wow. But so, really back to the whole. The years of St. Patrick's Day. So that's, you know, one thing that was craziness. That might have been the height of the crazy St. Patrick's Day parties I've ever been to.
- [30:18]
Brian
Oh, yeah. For me, for sure.
- [30:19]
Kristen
I've been down to the Savannah one and some different ones around Atlanta. But, yeah, that one was really crazy. But as of now, I just didn't do it. But I were like, cheers.
- [30:32]
Brian
I took my. We took our baby to the hospital. Yeah. We didn't take Chrissy to the hospital. We took the baby to the hospital. I'll tell that story in a different show, but it's too long to tell right now. But, yeah. I have been to Char. Savannah. Yeah. On a number of occasions for St. Patty's Day. I remember the first time I went to Savannah for St. Patty's Day. I feel like I had just turned 21. Or maybe I was 20 or 21.
- [30:57]
Kristen
Yeah. And I was kind of like a spring break.
- [31:00]
Brian
Yeah.
- [31:01]
Kristen
Kind of thing. Well, it's around spring break, too.
- [31:02]
Brian
So I remember feeling scared. Like, scared of going to Savannah's St. Patrick's Day because of how crazy I had heard it could get. Right. People could push, shove, fight, stuff like that.
- [31:13]
Kristen
Because they used to do the green or they do the greening of the fountains now. They have a ton of fountains and stuff. These squares.
- [31:19]
Brian
Yeah.
- [31:19]
Kristen
In Savannah. But they used to turn the river green.
- [31:22]
Brian
They do that in Chicago and Boston and all they used to do. I think they did.
- [31:26]
Kristen
They do that in Savannah for. For environmental reasons. But.
- [31:29]
Brian
Well, they still do it in. They do it in London. I saw pictures of it being done in London, and then I. Maybe they still do it in Chicago. If they don't do it in Chicago, that's a damn shame. But you're right. I mean, pouring all that dye into a river can't be good for you. It can't be good for the fishes. They can't see anything. Right. They have to see something. I mean, I don't know what a fish does, but Doesn't a fish have to do something with his eyeballs? I guess. I don't know.
- [31:50]
Kristen
They help. Yeah.
- [31:51]
Brian
One day a year. They're just really confused fish. But when I went to Savannah the first time, it lived up to the expectation that I had of it. It was absolute debauchery. I mean, debauchery. It was at a time when Girls Gone Wild was the most popular DVD out there. And there were so many tits, so much. So many guys making a fool themselves, so many people throwing up. So much drinking. I mean, just like. Honestly, like, just crazy drinking. The second time I went there, I got brave and I took LSD. Oh, on St. Patrick's Day. That is one way to do it. And let me tell you, it's not the right way to do it, because I did not last long down in Savannah. I actually curled up in a ball in an alley about half a mile away from the most, you know, the most populous part of this party. I literally found my way to an alley and I hid there until I knew it was safe to return back to the hotel. It was insane. It was insane. But now as an adult, it's like New Year's Eve. It's like a lot of Halloween. I was never really into Halloween anyway, but in New Year's Eve is always. I like New Year's Eve, but I don't nev. Never wanted to go pay $900 to be at a hotel party. Do you know what I'm saying?
- [33:09]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [33:09]
Brian
And so I feel like St. Patrick's Day is lost its luster just a little bit for me, certainly, but I feel like it's lost its luster in general just a little bit.
- [33:20]
Kristen
Yeah, I agree. I haven't. It's. Or maybe I'm just not tuned into it anymore, but I used to see way more celebrations, parties and things.
- [33:29]
Brian
Yeah, but it's also on a Sunday this year, so that's kind of. But I'll tell you what, I went down through one of the, like, local squares, you know, the little townships that are around here, little cities where people partying. They were partying.
- [33:40]
Kristen
Okay.
- [33:40]
Brian
Yeah, they were party.
- [33:41]
Kristen
Still alive.
- [33:42]
Brian
Still alive and well. There's a lot of families, so it wasn't. Didn't look like that kind of craziness. But then I look on Instagram and I see the regular post. Who is it? Flogging Molly. The Foggy Molly's or who's the other big Irish band?
- [33:54]
Kristen
You too?
- [33:54]
Brian
I lost my leg when I lost my leg. I should know this as an Irish Person, but I have no idea. Yes. U2 is the other Irish band that I can think of. Sinead o'. Connor. Yeah, there you go. But she just passed away. But, you know, listen, as you get older, I think you start to realize that oftentimes the things you think are going to be the most fun turn out to be the least fun. And it's really the nights that come out of nowhere that are the most fun.
- [34:28]
Kristen
That's true.
- [34:28]
Brian
Yes.
- [34:29]
Kristen
That really is true.
- [34:30]
Brian
So, like now in my life, when a new episode of Love is Blind drops on a day I'm not expecting, I'm like, fuck, yeah. Got my bear when I lost my leg. Come on, babe, get in bed, join the other 10 kids that are already here, and let's listen quietly. We'll watch Love is Blind with the closed captions on.
- [35:09]
Kristen
I know it's true. I come home also, I tend to think, like, okay, been there, done that.
- [35:14]
Brian
Oh, yeah, yeah. Leave it to the young kids.
- [35:17]
Kristen
Yeah, exactly.
- [35:18]
Brian
Leave it to the 21 year old. Absolutely. I don't have that much piss and.
- [35:23]
Kristen
Vinegar in the morning.
- [35:24]
Brian
Yeah. And the way that, you know, I. I hate to say this, but I just got to be honest. Crowds for me right now are kind of a big no, no. Unless I know everybody's going through security. Right. Because it just makes me a little bit nervous. There's so much bullshit that goes on these days, you know, you can't go anywhere without, you know, some taking out a gun and popping off, but which.
- [35:45]
Kristen
Might have just been what happened down the street.
- [35:48]
Brian
Yeah, it might have just. I don't know. But apparently the helicopter flying around my house, maybe they're coming for me. I don't know. Who knows? Put the commercial break down and walk outside with your hands up and your microphones off. We've had enough.
- [36:09]
Kristen
We've had many complaints.
- [36:11]
Brian
We've had many complaints. You're under arrest for disturbing all peace. You're. You're under arrest for disturbing any chance of peace. Can you please go back down to one episode a week? Put the microphone down and go back to one episode a week. Where's the fun in that? Where is the fun in that? So I didn't even get to telling my story that I wanted to tell, but that's the way the commercial break works. No, no, no. I'm glad we addressed that. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's good, it's good, it's good. I'm glad. I'm happy. I'm happy about how it all turned out. See, it's the best days that come out of nowhere, the best stories that come out of nowhere. But I do want to talk about what I have to talk about.
- [36:56]
Kristen
Okay.
- [36:57]
Brian
Because I've got some important things to say about this, and I think the world is changing for the better and I'd like to share it with the rest of our audience.
- [37:02]
Kristen
Okay.
- [37:03]
Brian
With the other three people that are listening to the commercial break right now. But let's do that after this. Take a break and we'll be back.
- [37:13]
Christina
Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath. And now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right. It's 212-54333, TCB. And you can text us anytime you want or you can call and leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram @thecommercial break and on TikTokcbpodcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com Now, I'm going to thank G one more time that we have sponsors. So thank G. And here they are.
- [37:55]
Brian
All right, you ready for me? My, my little story?
- [37:57]
Kristen
I am ready.
- [37:58]
Brian
All right. Or just laughing at something going on in the studio. Don't mind us. We're just being a bunch of idiots. All right, so let's back up to the year 1990, if you will, Chrissy.
- [38:15]
Kristen
Okay.
- [38:15]
Brian
I'm a young buck. I'm just starting my life here in Atlanta.
- [38:19]
Kristen
I'm picturing you as a horse or.
- [38:23]
Brian
A dinosaur with short arms, galloping free around. And I'm in the car and it's probably nine. I know it's got to be earlier than that. So maybe 8 o' clock in the morning, 7:30 in the morning. And like almost everybody else in Atlanta, we are tuned in to the International Olympic Committee's announcement of who will be hosting the 1996 Summer Olympic Games. And to almost nobody's surprise, but it was nice to hear it anyway. Atlanta, you'll never forget these words if you lived in Atlanta during that time. And the window is the city of Atlanta. And everybody, we were in traffic and all the horns start honking and people are pumping their fists out the window. I was on my way to school. I know that much because I was in my dad's car and my dad was like, oh, wow, that's really exciting that's going to be, it's going to be a big deal for the city, right? And we'll, we'll get some tickets to go, we'll find a way to go to some of these events. And I'm like six years from now, shit. I mean, you know, that's a lifetime. That's like half my life at that point. Right. But I was excited nonetheless because I felt like this is going to be a great thing in general. I didn't know why, but I knew it. But then as we got closer to the Olympics, I learned about something that I thought was rather strange. And that is, you know, they build these Olympic villages. Anytime that someone gets a bid for the Olympics, one of the things that they do is they build massive infrastructure projects to support that. All the events, all the events, those games, that one or two weeks in the summer or in the winter when those things are going to happen. Here in Atlanta, we built stadiums, we built swimming pool, we built aquatic centers, we built equestrian centers, we built hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of apartments in downtown Atlanta referred to as the Olympic Village that are now Georgia Tech dorms. And you know, all this construction, like the city was just growing right in front of your eyes. It's. And it has never stopped, by the way.
- [40:31]
Kristen
It hasn't.
- [40:33]
Brian
If anything, it's gotten faster. The pace has gotten faster. The buildings are getting taller, they're getting, it's getting more dense. But anyway, what I heard really surprised me, and I heard this when I was in the car with our friend Paul. You're still at the age where you're scared of pussy. The guy that I was painting for, right, that was going to get me a job at the Olympics selling T shirts that change colors when you got water on them. We sold zero T shirts.
- [40:57]
Kristen
But you did hook up with two models.
- [40:59]
Brian
I did hook up with two models. That's right. For a few minutes until they kicked me out of bed. Right. So what I heard on the radio was controversial in my mind. And that was there was no sex allowed inside the Olympic Village.
- [41:16]
Kristen
Oh, I forgot about that.
- [41:18]
Brian
None. It was a rule. You could not have sex with other athletes. You could not have sex at all. If you were an athlete staying inside the Olympic Village, you were not allowed, it was non permissible for you to have sex relations with anyone inside of that Olympic village. And the thought prevailing, thought, I think was number one. There's this kind of weird notion that's out there. Maybe it's true, maybe it's not, that you hold your shot, you Compete better, right? And take make of that what you will. And then there's this. There was this other fear that STDs were going to run around the Olympic Village. Now my thought was you're asking a bunch of really kids in their prime, some of them in their sexual prime, right, to not have sex. This is like the best thing that'll ever happen to them. You got to have a little icing on the cake. You're about to meet other very fit, right people who understand what you've gone through. You know, non stop practicing and all this other stuff. This has got to be like a big party for you. I mean, show up ready for game time, but party your ass off. The rest of it. It's supposed to be a big party, especially for the people who are making it interesting for the rest of us. Yeah. And so it really surprised me to hear that this was a rule. And now it's been a rule ever since. And only last Olympics did they start dispersing some condoms outside the Olympic Village, knowing that this was going to happen anyway in the hopes that they would be keeping people safe. Well, the Paris Olympics have finally. Leave it to the Parisians.
- [42:50]
Kristen
Leave it to the Parisians. I want to say. Leave it to the fucking Parisians. Yes.
- [42:53]
Brian
Yeah. They know. They know. Everyone wants to get their dick wet, right? Even if you don't have a dick, still want to get it wet. That's what you want to do. Because that is what you do when you're young and fun and you know, having a good time. Like, that's what you want to do. You want to hook up with people. And what a great opportunity to hook up with people from all around the world if you choose true, right? So finally, Paris. The Paris Olympics. They have lifted the intimacy ban for athletes inside of the Olympic Village. You want me to read this to you? Okay. From TMZ Sports, one of the most reliable investigative reporting out there. Don't be fooled by the TMZ in front. This is hard hitting news right here. I don't know why. I actually like Harvey. I actually like that guy Harvey. I don't know why. Yeah, I find him to be funny. Okay. 24 Paris Olympics lift intimacy ban 300,000 condoms now available for distribution.
- [43:55]
Kristen
300,000.
- [43:56]
Brian
Wow.
- [43:57]
Kristen
Go if you're gonna go.
- [43:59]
Brian
If you're gonna go. Go hard. Yeah. Do it. Literally. That's insane. That's insane. I mean, I don't know how many actual athletes there are, but I can't imagine more than 10, 12,000. I don't know. Right?
- [44:15]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [44:16]
Brian
I mean, how many sports are there? What are you expecting? Geez, I hope you got your sewer systems ready.
- [44:23]
Kristen
Everybody that's, like, affiliated with them, too. I don't know.
- [44:27]
Brian
Yeah, I don't know. I guess they're just assuming 300. Everyone's getting laid 10 times. Yeah, that's. Whoa. Wow. Well, I guess you've got yourself covered. Literally. Okay. Sex is not prohibited at the Olympics. This time around. The intimacy ban has been lifted, and the Olympic village will be stocked with over 300,000 condoms. And Harvey, put four exclamation points after that. That's what a good.
- [44:52]
Kristen
That makes it journalist does.
- [44:54]
Brian
That's right. Makes it true. Remember, bangin was banned at the Tokyo Olympics due to the COVID 19 pandemic where athletes had to practice social distancing. And to enforce the rule, Jimmy hats were provided, but they were not told to use them. They were told not to use them. They were told not to use them here. Hey, we'll give this to you to stare at.
- [45:16]
Kristen
I'm trusting that you won't use that.
- [45:17]
Brian
I'm trusting you won't use that. This is for whacking off only. We want to keep the jizz stains to a minimum on these rented beds. But coronavirus regulations have largely been lifted, giving the competitors a green light to get busy this summer. It is a very important. It is very important that the convil. The conviviality. What is conviviality? That means happy celebrating that the conviviality here is something big. I guess you're expecting a lot. Yes, said the director, Laurent. The village, which will house over 14,000 athletes and staff, will give out 300,000 condoms, enough for each person to have sex multiple times per day, in addition to other amenities. What other amenities are you giving them? Lube. Is that what. Lube Strap ons, I guess. I don't know. Yeah.
- [46:11]
Kristen
Handcuffs.
- [46:12]
Brian
Yeah. Working with the athletes commission, we want to create some places, some places where athletes will be able to feel very enthusiastic and comfortable. Wow.
- [46:20]
Kristen
Sextons.
- [46:21]
Brian
Yeah, it sounds like Michaud here is, like, encouraging it. This guy's been planning the whole village around a big, like, you know, a sibian or something. He's ready to get a big sex swing in the middle of the park. With all that sex. With all the sex and competition, the village is making sure to provide beds that can support £550 and a lot of food. Speaking of the food, the village director says they'll have nearly 400 yards of buffet stocked with food from across the world, fucking and eaten. Fucking and eating.
- [46:56]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [46:56]
Brian
And competing. That's it.
- [46:58]
Kristen
Yeah.
- [46:59]
Brian
That's what they got. 400 yards of buffet. That's amazing. That's four football fields of buffet. Where are they fitting that?
- [47:07]
Kristen
I don't know.
- [47:08]
Brian
God damn. I should have paid more attention as a child to my sports, you know, activities. I wish I had. You know I swam for a while, right? Yeah. And you know, those. I don't know if any of you have ever been on this. If you were on a swim club. Were you in a swim team?
- [47:23]
Kristen
Yeah, I was.
- [47:24]
Brian
You were. Do you remember like the endless days of practice and then the meets that went on for six hours in the afternoon, in the night time, it was a so hot. And everybody, you know. Now the 400 by 100 by two under sevens.
- [47:36]
Kristen
Yes.
- [47:36]
Brian
Now the 400 by 400 by 100 by two under ones. It's like it goes on forever. They do like it does a hundred different, you know, competitions at these meets. And they do these meets like every week. It was obnoxious.
- [47:50]
Kristen
And I was never the announcer for.
- [47:53]
Brian
Oh, he was. He was. Didn't that go on for hours? It does. Oh my God, I can't even imagine. But I should have paid more attention. Now I think I one time came in fourth in one of those competitions. I was like as close to the glory as I got. But if I had just tried a little harder, if I just swam a.
- [48:11]
Kristen
Little longer, practice a little longer, practice.
- [48:13]
Brian
A little longer, if I had towed my dad's boat more often across Lake Allatoona here in Georgia, then I just would have been a little bit, a little bit closer to that dream of being an Olympic athlete. Because this really sounds great. And you know what? After giving your entire fucking life up to the sport, to the glory, to your country so much, you should have 400 yards of buffet and 4,000 condoms with a tub of lube ready to just get licked every night. I mean, honestly, this should be the moment.
- [48:43]
Kristen
I can't wait to hear the stories that come out of this.
- [48:46]
Brian
Well, you know there's going to be one. Well, Ryan Lochte ain't there, so it's not going to be that interesting. Remember when Loch D was around sucking and fucking and you know, getting. When he get mugged one time in a gas station and they figured out that he was trying to buy drugs or something?
- [48:58]
Kristen
Yeah, that was in Brazil.
- [49:00]
Brian
It was in Brazil. Listen, if you can't be at a random gas station in the middle of Rio de Janeiro. No. Trying to buy Blow off somebody, you're going to get hurt. And that's what happened. But he said, they stole my cell phone. They stole your cell phone? They stole your cell phone because that's where you were texting somebody to buy drugs and you threw it down the sewer or whatever. Anyway, I think you, you go your entire life just focused on one thing and this one moment presents itself that two weeks or three weeks or whatever it is should be the absolute time of your life in every way. Conviviality all over the place. I didn't even know conviviality was a word.
- [49:37]
Kristen
Yeah, I love that word, too.
- [49:38]
Brian
You do? Oh, well, look at that. Why are you so much smarter than I am? Why am I the one talking on this show so much? Why don't you talk here? Your turn. You do it now.
- [49:50]
Kristen
I like just interjecting.
- [49:54]
Brian
What did you call me or. You said one time, I'll be your emotional support host. I thought that was pretty funny.
- [50:03]
Kristen
I said, I will be here for emotional support if you need me to.
- [50:07]
Brian
She's my emotional support co host. Yeah. Why don't you just. We'll put on a vest for you. I'm going to get you a vest. Please don't touch the emotional support co host. But I, I, I do think this is an idea whose time has come. I mean, obviously I remember these bands have pretty much. Yeah. Installed at every Summer Olympics ever. And let's be honest about it. I mean, God bless the Winter Olympics. And I love to watch the Olympics. I love that fucking loose rouge and that goddamn curling and I mean, I'll stay up all night long watching that curling. I don't know why, but it fascinates me. And I mean, can you imagine if you're a curler, you're an Olympic athlete, and you don't even have to look like an Olympic athlete. You just can be whatever, you know. All you have to do is get on one knee and slide that thing down, Right? Yeah. And do a lot of sweeping. Yeah, that's right.
- [51:01]
Kristen
Specific person that does that.
- [51:02]
Brian
It takes all kind. What about those guys do the big shot put. Right. They're sometimes they look like athletes. Certainly they're big boys and girls. Right. But the weight on them also helps them, you know, throw that thing down there or whatever they're doing. But let's be honest about it, the Winter Olympics doesn't get as much hype as the Summer Olympics for one reason and one reason only. Women's gymnastics.
- [51:24]
Kristen
Oh, right.
- [51:25]
Brian
That's it. Right now there's so Many other sports. I mean, there's a million other sports they play. I like watching the water polo.
- [51:30]
Kristen
What do you like? I like the gymnastics and I do like the ice skating for the winter.
- [51:36]
Brian
For the winter?
- [51:36]
Kristen
Yeah, yeah. I like the snowboarding, skiing, downhill skiing and the bobsled. I like, I like all of those. But yeah, the, the, the summer ones.
- [51:46]
Brian
Summer ones. The, the biggest.
- [51:48]
Kristen
I mean the track.
- [51:50]
Brian
Track and field. Oh, yeah, that's another one. Track and field and gymnastics. I love track and field. I love it. I get excited about the Olympics, I really do. Because I know at least for two weeks I have something to watch 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Oh, yeah, of course it is. And now it's in Paris, so there's six hours ahead of us. So, you know it's going to be on from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. It's going to be non stop coverage. You know that NBC paid like whatever it was, two and a half billion dollars or some shit like that for, you know, coverage through 20, 30 or. I can't remember that. I bet they make every dime back. I bet they make every dime back.
- [52:20]
Kristen
Yeah, because then that's how it's also running on everything. Because it's like cnbc, NBC, msnb, msnbc.
- [52:27]
Brian
I think MSNBC is going to be probably preoccupied this summer with the rematch between. I saw a post today, I don't know who it was, but there were two old wrestlers one time, like got back in the ring one time for an exhibition. It was like Hulk Hogan and somebody else. And they took their bodies like the picture of them, you know, the, the pre fight or the pre wrestle. So they took their bodies and they put Biden and Trump on top, the heads on top. And I was like, yep, that tracks. I know, the rematch, the Rumble in the Jungle. Yeah, I get excited about the Olympics. I just, there's something about it that makes me like happy. I turn on the TV and I'm like, oh, look at these people. They're doing great things.
- [53:11]
Kristen
Yeah. What's the one time too when all of these different countries and come together?
- [53:17]
Brian
Yeah. People generally are a little bit more convivial, if you will, when the Olympics is on. Let's hope that stays true this summer. This is going to be an interesting summer, kids. Kids. An interesting summer indeed. So, yeah, good luck to the athletes. Good luck. I hope you all get to use your allotted 10 condoms. Well, no, that's 10, that's 15. That's 20 condoms per. 20 condoms. Yeah.
- [53:46]
Kristen
You gotta stay Per.
- [53:47]
Brian
Yeah. I don't think I've ever used 20 condoms in two weeks. Have you? No. That's a lot. Yeah, that's a lot. Yeah. 21 EPMs. But that's stretched out over a month. We're talking about two weeks here. That's really compressing my timeline. And at my age, I shouldn't be lifting anything. Ferris Bueller, he's quite a little. Yeah. Hey, I want to. Thanks. Thanks again to Margaret Cho.
- [54:17]
Kristen
Thank you.
- [54:18]
Brian
Go back and listen to the episode. It was just yesterday, so you can't miss it. It's right there. It's right behind you. Oh, no, it wasn't.
- [54:24]
Kristen
I got confused.
- [54:25]
Brian
It wasn't yesterday. I'm sorry.
- [54:27]
Kristen
But thanks to Margaret.
- [54:28]
Brian
But thanks to Margaret Joe, no matter what, she'll be on soon.
- [54:30]
Kristen
Yeah, thanks to Margaret.
- [54:33]
Brian
Margaret Joe came in and we had a wonderful time with Miss Joe. You'll get that episode next week. I'm sorry, I'm totally confused as to where I'm going or what I'm doing. Don't mind me. I'm just an old puttering man. I just puttering around.
- [54:46]
Kristen
Margaret likes to put her.
- [54:47]
Brian
Yeah, I like to put. I. She likes to put her. She's a putter. That's right. And. And you know what? I could be like the third presidential nominee. I could honestly, I could talk in circles and say nothing. And I could do that all day long. Don't worry about me. All right. Go to tcbpodcast.com. that's where you get all the information about the show. You can watch all the video, listen to all the audio. All there, one location, tcb podcast.com. you can also get your free piggy fronting sticker. Piggy fronting, piggy front sticker.
- [55:22]
Kristen
All you gotta do, get your leggings on.
- [55:23]
Brian
Get your legs on. Get that pink front sticky.
- [55:28]
Kristen
Get to pop off. Popping.
- [55:30]
Brian
Get the paw paw popping in that limping village. I'll tell you what, it's gonna be a hootin good time. I got a bunch of rubbers. Rubbers. That's what we used to call. Call it. Hey, you got any rubbers? Yes, I do. I was 14 walking around with a condom in my wallet. Why? Why?
- [55:49]
Kristen
Just in case.
- [55:50]
Brian
Just in case. So get your free piggy front and sticker by hitting the contact us button on the website. Then give us your address, we'll send you a sticker. It's that easy. We would love you to be on the commercial break. It's your turn now. You talk. I'm done. Now you talk. 212-4333 TCB. That's 212-4333 TCB. Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. But most importantly, we want you to come on the show, ask for our advice, tell us a funny story. Just generally have a good time. You gotta text us and let us know at the commercial break on Instagram www.YouTube.com the commercial break for the interview episodes. Okay, Chrissy, I love you.
- [56:33]
Kristen
I love you.
- [56:34]
Brian
And best to you. Best to you. Outside, outside there out in the podcast universe. Until next time, we will say, we do say. And we must say goodbye, Sardi in the morning.