#251 - Joby Martin // Why Forgiveness Sets You Free At Christmas

Summary

The Daily Blade: Joby Martin & Kyle Thompson
Episode #251 - Joby Martin // Why Forgiveness Sets You Free At Christmas
Date: December 17, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this poignant Christmas edition of The Daily Blade, Pastor Joby Martin offers a powerful reflection on forgiveness, emphasizing its transformative power during the holiday season. Drawing from Matthew 18 and personal insights, Joby encourages listeners to practice radical forgiveness—not simply as a feeling, but as an obedient act modeled by Christ Himself. This episode is designed to equip Christians, especially men, to win at Christmas by releasing the burdens of resentment and embracing the freedom found in forgiving others.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Forgiveness as the Heart of Christmas

[00:20–01:40]

• Joby challenges the common saying “Jesus is the reason for the season”, redirecting focus toward those around us who need forgiveness as the actual reason Jesus came at Christmas.
• He explains:
  “Jesus came on a rescue mission to save sinners… because Jesus forgave you and me… we are called to forgive.” [00:45]

2. Biblical Framework for Forgiveness

[01:41–03:40]

• Joby reads Matthew 18:15–35, highlighting the parable of the unforgiving servant.
  • The story illustrates the vast mercy shown by the king (representing God) compared to the petty refusal to forgive by the servant (representing people).
  • Key quote from scripture:
    “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” – Jesus (Matthew 18:22) [02:15]
• Forgiveness is not about arithmetic but about a continual, generous act modeled on God’s forgiveness.

3. Practical Steps to Forgive

[03:41–05:00]

• Identify the Debt: Recognize who has hurt you and what was taken or owed.
• Name the Emotions: Write down the emotions attached to this hurt.
• Create a Debt Ledger: Be concrete about the injury before intentionally deciding to forgive.
• Memorable analogy:
  “When somebody has done you wrong and sinned against you, they have created a debt-debtor relationship… Like, if the person you can’t get along with this Christmas is your ex because she cheated on you, then she has created a debt–debtor relationship.” [04:23]

4. Resentment, Bitterness, and Freedom

[05:01–05:45]

• Joby warns that withholding forgiveness leads to bitterness:
  • “If you decide to withhold forgiveness, then that withholding of forgiveness will begin to ferment. And when things ferment, they stink. And you can get drunk on it.” [05:10]
• Resentment imprisons the non-forgiver, not the offender.

5. Forgiveness vs. Reconciliation

[05:46–06:10]

• Forgiveness is a unilateral commandment; reconciliation requires both forgiveness and repentance.
• “Forgiveness is a unilateral commandment. Reconciliation is something different. Reconciliation requires forgiveness and repentance. But regardless of what the person has done for you, because Christ has forgiven us, we must forgive one another.” [05:50]

6. Spiritual Ramifications

[05:55–06:18]

• Joby connects our struggle to forgive others (horizontal) with our trust in God’s forgiveness of us (vertical).
• “The Devil wants you to doubt forgiveness on a horizontal level because he wants you to doubt that God on a vertical level could forgive you.” [06:10]
• Emphasizes that, by forgiving, believers are set free, mirroring Christ’s forgiveness for humanity.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Joby Martin:
  “The actual reason for the season is the people that you need to forgive.” [00:34]
• On the cost of forgiveness:
  “When we do that, we will be the ones that are actually set free.” [05:45]
• A practical warning:
  “Anytime somebody walks around with resentment and bitterness in their heart, it is because often there’s been a lack of forgiveness.” [05:21]

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Important Timestamps

• 00:20 – Joby introduces the Christmas forgiveness challenge.
• 01:41 – Reading from Matthew 18:15–35, parable of the unforgiving servant.
• 03:41 – Joby offers concrete steps to practice forgiveness.
• 05:10 – Analogy of withheld forgiveness fermenting into resentment.
• 05:46 – Distinguishing forgiveness from reconciliation.
• 06:10 – Spiritual connection between forgiving others and believing God’s forgiveness.

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Conclusion

Joby leaves listeners with a practical and spiritual exhortation for Christmas:
“To win this year at Christmas, I implore you to forgive. Because Christ has forgiven us.” [06:17]

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This episode is a heartfelt, challenging call for believers to embody the heart of Christmas—freedom and reconciliation through forgiveness—regardless of the situation or season.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome to the Daily Blade. The word of God is described as the sword of the spirit, the primary spiritual weapon in the Christian's armor against the forces of evil. Your hosts are Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson, and they stand ready to equip men for the fight. Let's sharpen up.

[B]

All right. Day three in this Christmas edition of the Daily Blade on tips to win this year at Christmas. My tip for day three is this. Forgive. How many of you have seen the bumper sticker that says, Jesus is the reason for the season? And I know what people mean by that, like, Jesus is the point of Christmas. We're going to talk about that on the last day. But if you think about it, the actual reason for the season are the people that you need to forgive. You see, Jesus came on a rescue mission to save sinners. What we celebrate at Christmas is that Jesus made this landed invasion to come and rescue and redeem us. And here's the thing, that because Jesus forgave you and me, even and especially when we didn't deserve it, then we are called to forgive. You are going to be around some family members who have hurt you, who have done you wrong, who have sinned against you. You and I are called to forgive. I'm going to read a lot of Bible here. Matthew, chapter 18, verse 15. The Bible says, if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you. That every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him to be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. And again I say to you, if two, three of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them. Verse 21. And Peter came up to Jesus and said, lord, how often will my brother sin against me? And I forgive him as many as seven times. And Jesus said to him, I do not say to you seven times, but 77 times. Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him 10,000 talents. That's like trillions of dollars. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold with his wife and his children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, have patience with me. I will pay you everything. And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him his debt. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him 100 denarii. That'd be like 100 bucks. And seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, pay what you owe. And so his fellow servants fell down and pleaded with him, have patience with me and I will pay you. He refused and he went and he put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and they reported to their master all that had taken place. And when his master summoned him and said to him, you wicked servant, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had the same mercy on your fellow servant as I had mercy on you? And in anger, his master delivered him to the jailers until he should pay all his debts. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. So how do you win this year at Christmas? Is you forgive. Forgiveness is a unilateral commandment. Now, reconciliation is something different. Reconciliation requires forgiveness and repentance. But regardless of what the person has done for you, because Christ has forgiven us, we must forgive one another. Now, there's a lot of misunderstandings about forgiveness. People think forgiveness is a feeling. That's not what the Bible says. The reason that Jesus gives this story about the Master settling accounts is forgiveness is about settling accounts. When somebody has done you wrong and sinned against you, they have created a debt debtor relationship. You've got to identify who sinned against you. That probably shouldn't be that hard. Then you need to identify what they took from you, what they owe you. I would also encourage you to identify the emotions surrounding that sin against you. This is not the kind of thing that happens in a second, but in doing so, you will create a debt ledger. Like, if the person that you can't get along with this Christmas is your ex because she cheated on you, then she has created a debt debtor relationship. She owed you fidelity, she lied to you, she broke your heart. And then you write down the emotions that go along with it. That is a debt ledger. And they're in your hand. You hold the debt ledger. Now you get to decide what you want to do with it. And I'm going to warn you, if you decide to withhold forgiveness, then that withholding of forgiveness will begin to ferment. And when things ferment, they stink. And you can get drunk on it. And anytime somebody walks around with resentment and bitterness in their heart, it is because often there's been a lack of forgiveness. Now what Christ has done for us is even though we didn't deserve it, Christ canceled our debt. And in the same way we are to cancel one another's debt because he forgave us of all of our sin, past, present and future. And yet we have been called to forgive the people that sinned against us not necessarily be reconciled. That's a different talk. But to cancel that debt. And when we do that, we will be the ones that are actually set free. And sure enough, even if you cancel that debt, at some point in the future, some kind of feelings are going to pop up. And the Devil wants you to doubt that forgiveness can work on a horizontal level. And the reason he wants you to doubt forgiveness on the horizontal level is he wants you to doubt that God on a vertical level could forgive you. So to win this year at Christmas, I implore you to forgive. Because Christ has forgiven us.

[A]

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