TDS Time Machine | Easter & Passover

Summary

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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Episode: TDS Time Machine | Easter & Passover

Date: April 5, 2026
Host: Comedy Central News Team, featuring Jon Stewart (referenced), John Oliver, John Hodgman, Beth Littleford, Samantha Bee, Desi Lydic, Michael Kosta

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Daily Show: Ears Edition uses the time machine format to look at how Easter and Passover traditions are celebrated in America, with a focus on religious and cultural contrasts, the intersection of identity politics, and the way national controversies often attach themselves to holidays. The team delivers trademark satirical commentary on headline events—spotlighting the White House Easter Egg Roll, the traditions of Passover, and recent conservative outrage over the coincidence of Transgender Day of Visibility falling on Easter Sunday.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Absurdities and Joy of American Easter Traditions

• The show opens with John Hodgman and John Oliver riffing on family Easter celebrations, poking fun at the blending of spiritual and commercial elements in modern American Easter, such as the mythology of the giant rabbit and chocolate eggs.

  • Memorable Quote [00:55]:

    "Remember how Jesus died for our sins and then came back as a giant rabbit who lays chocolate eggs? I haven’t been to church in a while." – John Hodgman

• Coverage of President Trump and President Obama’s White House Easter Egg Rolls, highlighting the surreal lineup of mascots and the lack of sense in the traditions.

  • [01:39]:

    "Standing next to the Easter bunny, I mean, sorry, I couldn't help it." – John Hodgman

• The comedic incongruity of singing the national anthem during such moments is lampooned.

  • [02:09]:

    "Americans sing the national anthem at the strangest times... standing next to the Easter bunny, that's where you're like, we need to honor this moment with a meaningful display of patriotism. Bunny, put your hilarious giant club over your heart." – John Hodgman

2. Passover Explained: Seder, Symbolism, and Underdog Holidays

• Senior Theological Correspondent Beth Littleford gives a tongue-in-cheek explanation of Passover, highlighting the dignity and rituals, and drawing contrasts with Easter’s commercial excess.

  • [03:12]:

    "Shalom to you, John, which by the way means hello, goodbye or peace. It’s the aloha of the Middle East." – Beth Littleford

  • [03:44]:

    "Passover is commemorated with a tradition filled feast which includes bread that doesn't rise, called matzo, because people were running from slavery in the desert. And crackers pack easier than loaves..."

• The team pokes fun at the heavy symbolism (bitter herbs, salt water) and the lack of kid-friendly Passover festivities compared to Easter's bounty of sweets.

  • [04:31]:

    "Can’t your food be less symbolic and more good?" – Beth Littleford

3. The Battle of the Holidays: Christian vs. Jewish Traditions

• John Oliver humorously bemoans the disadvantage Jews face in the “holiday arms race,” using personal anecdotes and meta commentary on Christian dominance in the cultural landscape.

  • [09:04]:

    "The key is the children, people. That’s what Christians have figured out. You get the children, you win."

• Imaginary pitches for making Passover more appealing to children, such as cartoon mascots (Passover Pete, the guitar-playing lion) and video games (Red Sea Redemption: The Wandering).

  • [14:25]:

    "I'm not saying we gotta go Jehovah's Witness on this thing, but what's wrong with thinking outside the box? We got a great story here. Moses parting the red seas. How have we not turned that into a water park? ... When the kids turn 13, we'll tell them the real story." – John Oliver

4. Holiday Collision: Easter Meets Transgender Day of Visibility

• The news team dissects the outrage from conservative pundits after Transgender Day of Visibility happened to fall on Easter Sunday in 2026.

  • [16:17]:

    "Yes, by total coincidence, Trans Visibility Day happened to fall on Easter this year, which seemed like, I don't know, good fit to me. I mean, Jesus did identify as the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Live your truth, Queen." – Desi Lydic

• Satirical analysis on how conservative outrage is more about visibility than calendar conflicts; exposes ignorance about both holidays.

  • [17:34]:

    "This is America, buddy. Every day is Christian Visibility Day." – Desi Lydic

  • [19:39]:

    "And the transgender community purposely chooses the day of Jesus' death or his resurrection. Whatever. Easter weekend." – Michael Kosta (mocking)

• Parody of Trump's vague religiosity and media talking points.

  • [17:53]:

    "I'm wondering what one or two of your most favored Bible verses are and why?" "I wouldn't want to get into it, because, to me, that's very personal. You know, when I talk about the Bible, it's very personal." – Trump (clip)

• The crew jokes about conservatives’ need to pit holidays against each other for maximum outrage and attention.

  • [24:27]:

    "The lesson we learned this week is that Americans appreciate holidays more when they're outraged. Which is why I believe we need to pit more holidays against each other." – Michael Kosta

5. LGBTQ+ Inclusion and Exclusion in Easter Traditions

• Flashback to earlier Easter controversies: President Bush’s exclusion of gay and lesbian families from the White House Easter Egg Roll.

  • [27:03]:

    "'That ain't right.' 'It ain't okay to be gay.'" – Protestors, imitated by Michael Kosta and John Hodgman

  • [28:40]:

    “Bible is very clear on this, John. In the Garden of Eden, the Lord hid eggs for Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.” – Samantha Bee (satire)

• Critique of the supposed sanctity of traditions and exclusionary practices, using humor to highlight hypocrisy.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• [03:10] Beth Littleford: “What a lot of us don’t know is that our Jewish friends actually celebrated a whole nother holiday called Passover, which to this day has retained its tradition and dignity and in my mind, blows Easter away.”
• [04:43] John Oliver: “What kind of freaky pagan cult drinks the symbolic tears?”
• [09:04] John Oliver: “The key is the children, people. That’s what Christians have figured out. You get the children, you win.”
• [13:41] John Oliver: “They got Tebow? Tim Tebow, superstar NFL quarterback, helping them celebrate Easter. He’s drawing like 20,000 people. ... Who do we have? Same guest every year. Elijah. He can't even be bothered to show up.”
• [16:17] Desi Lydic: “Jesus did identify as the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Live your truth, Queen.”
• [17:34] Desi Lydic: “This is America, buddy. Every day is Christian Visibility Day.”
• [21:16] Desi Lydic: “Trans Day of Visibility could have been on National Pasta Day, and they’d be like, this is an affront to fettuccine.”
• [24:27] Michael Kosta: “Americans appreciate holidays more when they're outraged. Which is why I believe we need to pit more holidays against each other.”
• [28:40] Samantha Bee: “Bible is very clear on this, John. In the Garden of Eden, the Lord hid eggs for Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.”

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Notable Segments and Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |:-------------:|:----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:48 | Opening banter; Easter and Passover as American celebrations and comedic fodder | | 02:33 | “World of Religion” headline; satirical wrap up on Easter/Passover by Beth Littleford | | 06:38 | John Oliver launches in-depth take on children’s holiday appeal: Easter vs. Passover | | 09:04 | “Get the children, you win” – importance of kid-friendly traditions | | 13:41 | Tim Tebow as Easter’s “special guest” vs. perennial Passover guest Elijah | | 15:40 | Desi Lydic previews the controversy around Easter and Transgender Day of Visibility | | 16:17 | Sharp, satirical take comparing the Holy Trinity to “living your truth, Queen” | | 17:53 | Trump’s classic rambling about his love for “the Bible” (clip) | | 19:39 | Mocking confusion about the meaning and timing of Easter by Michael Kosta | | 22:27 | Satirical “live from the White House” Easter coverage | | 24:27 | “Holidays are meaningful when they’re controversial” | | 25:14 | Flashback to exclusion of gay families at White House Easter Egg Roll | | 28:40 | Samantha Bee’s “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” parody |

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Tone and Language

The episode is quintessentially Daily Show: sardonic, irreverent, and rapid-fire with pop culture references, playful banter, and biting political satire. The correspondents use overstatement and absurd hypothetical scenarios to illuminate real social and political dynamics, keeping the conversation engaging and humorous even when tackling cultural conflicts and exclusion.

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Summary Conclusion

This special “TDS Time Machine” episode highlights The Daily Show’s ability to use comedy to dissect the collision of faith, tradition, politics, and identity in America. By comparing Easter and Passover, the News Team exposes the quirks and biases in how holidays are celebrated and weaponized in the culture wars—from sugary overindulgence to political one-upmanship and the perennial struggle for inclusivity. The show reminds listeners that American traditions (however nonsensical) are both sacred and up for relentless, satirical scrutiny.

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Transcript

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[John Hodgman]

Happy Passover and Happy Easter, everybody. Yeah, I hope you enjoyed it. Did you have a good one? Did you enjoy it?

[John Oliver]

Yeah.

[John Hodgman]

Spend some time with the family. Easter is one of my favorite holidays because I like, I get to chill with the family. We get to eat, you know, remember how Jesus died for our sins and then came back as a giant rabbit who lays chocolate eggs? I haven't been to church in a while. Anyway, Happy Easter, everyone. Let's catch up on today's headlines. Easter, it's an important holiday for any devout Christian. And also for President Trump, who celebrated today at the annual White House Easter Egg Roll.

[John Oliver]

President Trump standing by at 1600 Pennsylvania for that Easter egg role. At this moment, they are singing the national anthem. President Trump flanked by the first lady and the Easter bunny himself or herself perhaps.

[John Hodgman]

Oh, I love how the anchor said him himself or herself perhaps. Yeah, I still can't confirm if this mythical creature has a vagina or not. Not that sex is defined by genitalia. More on that at the top of the hour. Honestly, I like, this is one of those moments where I'm like, American traditions never quite make sense to me. Like we're all just supposed to pretend that that ridiculous creature belongs at the White House. Standing next to the Easter bunny, I mean, sorry, I couldn't help it.

[John Oliver]

I couldn't help it.

[John Hodgman]

I couldn't help it. Also, Americans sing the national anthem at the strangest times. Like, I get it. At sports, I get it completely. But standing next to the Easter bunny, that's where you're like, we need to honor this moment with a meaningful display of patriotism. Bunny, put your hilarious giant club over your heart.

[John Oliver]

It was a very busy weekend in the world of religion. And here with a wrap up is our senior theological correspondent, Beth Littleford. Beth.

[Beth Littleford]

Well, as we all know, America celebrated yesterday with the usual crass over commercialized assortment of chocolate, eggs and marshmallow peeps. But what a lot of us don't know is that our Jewish friends actually celebrated a whole nother holiday called Passover, which to this day has retained its tradition and dignity and in my mind, blows Easter away.

[Samantha Bee]

Now,

[Beth Littleford]

shalom to you, John, which by the way means hello, goodbye or peace. It's the aloha of the Middle East.

[John Oliver]

Shalom to you as well.

[Beth Littleford]

Thank you. Thank you, John. Now, I went to a seder at my Jewish friend Blyde's. Well, actually, she's half Jewish. And I discovered that Passover is so named because the angel of death passed over the homes of the Jews. Oh, you're a Jew. I'll pass you over.

[John Oliver]

That's very nice, Beth.

[Beth Littleford]

Thank you, John. Now, Passover is commemorated with a tradition filled feast which includes bread that doesn't rise, called matzo, because people were running from slavery in the desert. And crackers pack easier than loaves. There's also bitter herbs because the herbs they had to eat back then were in fact very bitter. And salt water, which symbolizes the salt water the ancient Hebrews used to symbolize their tears.

[John Oliver]

Well, Beth, I have to tell you, I'm very impressed with your research.

[Beth Littleford]

Thank you, John. You know, and I have to say that Passover is by far the most dignified of the holy days. And I've always been a big Jesus in heaven.

[John Hodgman]

Those herbs are bitter.

[John Oliver]

Well, it's bitter herbs. That's what they're, they're symbolic of the slavery. That's why they're.

[Beth Littleford]

Well, can't your food be less symbolic and more good?

[John Oliver]

Water?

[Beth Littleford]

Mary, mother of God, that's salty water.

[John Oliver]

Well, it's, it's, it's the symbolic tears. You don't really.

[Beth Littleford]

You don't get what kind of freaky

[John Oliver]

pagan cult drinks the symbolic tears?

[Beth Littleford]

What's next? Drinking of symbolic blood?

[John Oliver]

Isn't that what you guys do when you.

[Beth Littleford]

Oh, yeah, we do. But just to wash down the taste of the chocolate bunnies.

[John Oliver]

That's little Ford, everybody.

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[John Oliver]

well, let's begin tonight with the weekend's festivities. A big weekend for what we call Judeo Christians. Two major religious festivals at the same time. And President Obama celebrated both of them in what I believe is an attempt to convince people he isn't Muslim. Nice try. Nice try. Yesterday, of course, was Easter, which along with Good Friday, commemorates the death and resurrection of Christ. And this morning, the White House celebrated in the manner prescribed by scripture. In just about a half hour, they're going to start the 134th annual White House Easter Egg Roll. These are some of our friends here. The Power Rangers, Alvin, the Chipmunks, Wubba Wubsy Penguins.

[Desi Lydic]

Cat in the Hat has been trying to get on camera the entire time that you were talking about.

[Michael Kosta]

Here are the eggs.

[John Oliver]

Eggs.

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The eggs are here right now.

[John Oliver]

We got some Harlem Globetrotters. It's a great holiday for people who gave up LSD for Lent. You see all them too, right? Actually, this scene is true to biblical scholarship. I remember these characters from the Last Supper. If I'm not mistaken, that was One of you will betray me, Alvin. So the White House pulls out all the stops for Easter. Passover's the same weekend. Bring it. I'd like to wish a happy holiday to all those celebrating Passover. Led by Jewish members of my staff will retell the story of the Exodus. Listen to our youngest guests ask the four questions and of course, look forward to a good bowl of matzo ball soup. That's it. That's what Jews get. You get a huge shindig on the White House lawn for Easter with every children's character that has ever been invented, including this guy. Who the is this guy? Captain Planet. Oh, what's his super. He's Captain Planet. Hey, kids. My selling point for my people is we're gonna have soup. It's the Avengers versus the Jewish members of my staff. Hey, kids. Who wants to meet Debbie Wasserman Schultz? Where's everybody going? Look. And I get it. I don't want to say satyrs are boring, but this isn't a photo we're showing. It's video. Allow me to get personal for just a moment. As a father of mixed faith children who are exposed to both Christian and I can't help but feel that we Jews are getting our asses kicked out here. In fact, you know what, Jews? Camera three, What are we doing? We've already conceded defeat in the Christmas v. Hanukkah kerfuffle, seeing that the Christians are celebrating the birth of the their savior, and Hanukkah is acknowledging oil lasting longer than it would normally last. And to be honest with you, truth be told, there really is no gauge. I mean, how much oil was in there? Could have been eight days worth of oil. We don't really know. I mean, it could have been a very reasonable amount of oil to burn for. It's not the point. It's not the point. The point is this. There's no contest there. Hanukkah, Christmas, no contest. But we can't afford to lose this one too. The key is the children, people. That's what Christians have figured out. You get the children, you win. Let's check out both sides. Holiday pitch. Okay, kids, Easter weekend is an observation of Christ's crucifixion and resurrection. So ba bam, ba bam. A basket with candy. We got chocolate bunnies, we got candy eggs. We got chocolate bunnies who lay candy eggs filled with more chocolate. And how are Christians the one that came up with plastic grass, by the way? We're the ones with hay fever, but all right. It's cool. It's cool. Jews. What do we got? Well, we're celebrating our freedom from slavery, so ba bam, Let my people nosh. We could have gone with a freedom themed festival. Or instead we chose to focus on the slavery part of the dinner. Hey, five year olds. Basket filled with candy and jelly beans or horseradish still in root form. Would you like the treats a magical bunny brought you? Or a bone from a dead baby lamb? Don't worry, we used its blood to mark the door. Oh, which. Which egg am I gonna go for? The one filled with chocolate or the one filled with egg? Cause it's an actual egg. Cause that's what slaves ate. Taste it. Oh, wa. Make sure you dip it in salt water. It represents the tears of your ancestors. Oh, good. I see you're making more. Mishpocha. We gotta take it up a notch. They're crushing us. I'm not saying we lose our traditions, but we gotta adapt it with a slight nod towards recruitment. I'm not saying we gotta go Jehovah's Witness on this thing, but what's wrong with bringing a little zaz thinking outside the box? We got a great story here. Moses parting the red seas. How have we not turned that into a water park? Oh, wait. I'll see you over at the Red Sea Ride when I'm done building ice cream pyramids. We gotta do something. Did you see who the Christians booked this year as their special guest star on this Easter Sunday?

[Conservative Commentator]

A familiar face helping to deliver the Sunday sermon.

[John Oliver]

Quarterback Tim Tebow. They got Tebow? Tim Tebow, superstar NFL quarterback helping them celebrate Easter. He's drawing like 20,000 people to Texas. Who do we have? Same guest every year. Elijah. He can't even be bothered to show up. Obviously, it would be great if we also could get a superstar Jewish quarterback to deliver the Passover story. But my guess is a superstar Jewish quarterback is around the same likelihood as Elijah showing up. But let's at least compete with the make believe Easter bunny. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Passover Pete, the guitar playing, pizza eating l. Hey, kids. Hey, kids. Have your Passover pizza. Wham, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Now, I know technically you're not allowed to eat pizza during Passover. But technically, lions don't play guitars, and quite frankly, bunnies don't deliver eggs. So let's just say we suspend a little disbelief. When the kids turn 13, we'll tell them the real story. So we gotta step it up a bit. If you'll excuse me, I'll be playing the latest title in my hot new Jewish video game, Passover line. Red Sea Redemption. The wandering. It's a first person exoduser where kids can experience all the excitement of being lost in the desert for 40 years. Mmm. What's the. Left, right morning.

[Beth Littleford]

Ask for directions.

[John Oliver]

You know where you're going. Again, only 38 more years to go.

[Desi Lydic]

This past Sunday was Easter at the White House, which is an important holiday for President Joe Biden, who is also counting on a resurrection for his campaign. But unfortunately, this year, the timing of Easter caused a bit of a headache for Joe.

[John Hodgman]

The Biden administration is firing back at conservative criticism over the White House acknowledgment. Of the Transgender Day of Visibility, which

[John Oliver]

coincidentally falls on Easter Sunday this year.

[Beth Littleford]

The two days only coincided by chance. The Day of Visibility is held every year on March 31, while the date

[Samantha Bee]

for Easter changes year to year.

[Desi Lydic]

Yes, by total coincidence, Trans Visibility Day happened to fall on Easter this year, which seemed like, I don't know, good fit to me. I mean, Jesus did identify as the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Live your truth, Queen. Now, you wouldn't think that Easter falling on a holiday that's been on March 31st for 15 years would be that big of a deal, but conservatives process this like a child meeting the Easter bunny by losing their. I think everyone should be insulted by this.

[Samantha Bee]

The intentional nature of this, to me is.

[John Oliver]

I mean, I'm just gonna say it.

[Michael Kosta]

I think it's demonic.

[Beth Littleford]

They clearly want us to bow at

[John Oliver]

the altar of the trans community instead

[Beth Littleford]

of bow to God.

[Michael Kosta]

We can't have one day for Easter.

[John Oliver]

What the hell was Biden thinking when he declared Easter Sunday to be trans visibility? Such total disrespect to Christians. And November 5th is going to be called something else. You know, it's going to be called Christian Visibility Day when Christians turn out in numbers that nobody has ever seen before.

[Desi Lydic]

This is America, buddy. Every day is Christian Visibility Day. Yes, conservatives threw a hissy fit over this, including Donald Trump, who, by the way, is not exactly an authority on Christianity.

[John Oliver]

I'm wondering what one or two of your most favored Bible verses are and why I wouldn't want to get into it, because to me, that's very personal. You know, when I talk about the Bible, it's very personal. So I don't want to get into verses I don't want to get into. There's no verse that means a lot to you that you think about or cite. The Bible means a lot to me, but I don't want to get into specifics. The Old Testament guy or New Testament guy, probably. Probably equal.

[Desi Lydic]

Trump talks about Christianity the way I sound at every book club. Oh, my favorite part of the book. I'd have to say the title and the symbolism, all the symbols. Definitely not hiding from my husband and children. I also love that he says, I can't talk about it. It's too personal. Like, he also has an NDA with the Bible. Don't believe that horse face Bible. But that's my Trump impression. Thank you. Thank you. I'll workshop it. I'll workshop it. Trump aside, I have a question for the actual religious conservatives. Why are you so upset about this Trans Visibility Day? Had no effect on your Easter. Nobody was at church like, well, we were gonna celebrate the resurrection, but instead, everyone line up for your gender reassignment surgery. Please leave your penis in the collection basket. The anger just seems so contrived, Especially when the people who were the most outraged knew so, so little about the actual holiday they were protecting.

[Michael Kosta]

And the transgender community purposely chooses the day of Jesus death or his resurrection. Whatever. Easter weekend.

[Desi Lydic]

Yeah, you know, Easter. It was Jesus Quinceanera or the day he was forced to leave the Big Brother house. Whatever. I'll ask him about it the next time I go to the. You know, what's the place with all the lowercase t's hanging on half naked? Church. Church. That's it. Church. And you know what? The Fox audience deserves a higher level of con artistry than this Jesse Watters. If you can remember the green M&Ms. Entire sexual history, you can Wikipedia what Easter is. Look, I'm not here to pick a fight with Easter. Easter's great. Probably our best holiday featuring a bunny who crawled out of a nightmare. But the level of outrage over this is totally out of proportion to what ultimately was an innocuous scheduling conflict. I just. I wish I knew the real reason they were upset. Luckily, they left us some Easter eggs.

[Conservative Commentator]

It's absurd, and Joe Biden should be ashamed of himself. And all these people say, yeah, but this is the day we've always recognized Transgender Visibility Day. Well, recognize it another day. Not on Easter Sunday. It's an affront to the Bible, and quite frankly, it's an affront to biology. There are two genders. People can't just go in and out of one like a revolving door. It's not normal.

[Desi Lydic]

Ah, there it is. Thank you, least interesting man in the world for saying the quiet part out loud. They don't think Transgender Visibility Day should be moved. They think trans people shouldn't be visible at all. Trans Day of visibility could have been on National Pasta Day, and they'd be like, this is an affront to fettuccine. And for what it's worth, there's a false premise at the heart of this entire controversy, which is that there's even a conflict between trans people and Christianity to begin with. There isn't. In fact. The Bible doesn't say anything about trans people. It does, however, say to love thy neighbor and to not judge other people. And perhaps the most famous of Bible verses, please do not sell me for $59.99 to pay off your race fund. Amen. For more on this controversy, we Go live to the White House with Michael Costa. Michael, you were at the White House Easter egg hunt on Monday. What did you find?

[Michael Kosta]

Well, I'll tell you what I found, Desi. A ton of Easter eggs. Okay? And it turns out you didn't even have to hu. You just wait for the kids to find them, and you take them out of their baskets. It's like taking candy from a baby.

[Desi Lydic]

Congratulations. I mean, more about Easter being pitted against Trans Visibility Day. It seems like all this controversy ruined the day for the trans community.

[Michael Kosta]

Are you kidding? This was the most successful trans visibility Day in history. Fox News raised trans awareness for 500 straight hours.

[John Oliver]

Yeah,

[Michael Kosta]

and the best part is we'll get another round in a few weeks when Greek Orthodox Easter goes up against Greek Orthodox Trans Visibility Day.

[Desi Lydic]

Okay, but I don't think transgender. The transgender community wanted this kind of attention.

[Michael Kosta]

Well, look, I can't speak on behalf of the trans community. They've specifically asked me to stop doing that. But it seems to me that, anyway, a holiday can break through the noise, the better. There's just too many important days to remember. Easter, Memorial Day, Arbor Day, my kid's birthday, which is, like, every year, supposedly. It's too much. And there's no way to keep track of all these important days.

[John Oliver]

You know what, Desi?

[Michael Kosta]

They need to invent, like, a spreadsheet, but for days.

[Desi Lydic]

Like a calendar.

[Michael Kosta]

One of those things you drain pasta with. That'll never work, does it?

[Desi Lydic]

Okay, but what about conservatives who say this was an attack on Easter?

[Michael Kosta]

Desi, this was good for both holidays. When was the last time you saw people this fired up about Easter, AKA shitty Christmas? But now, thanks to this controversy, everyone, and I mean everyone except for Jesse Watters, knows what Easter is really about.

[Desi Lydic]

Okay, so you're saying that the clash of the two holidays forced everyone to appreciate the true meaning of each holiday?

[Michael Kosta]

Exactly. The lesson we learned this week is that Americans appreciate holidays more when they're outraged. Which is why I believe we need to pit more holidays against each other. Let's put Valentine's day on the 4th of July. Let's move 911 to Halloween. Let's move Mother's Day up against Juneteenth. Do you love your mom or do you hate slavery?

[John Oliver]

You gotta choose, Desi.

[Desi Lydic]

Michael, that is

[John Oliver]

a tough choice.

[Desi Lydic]

That is incredibly offensive.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, you see? It's already working.

[Desi Lydic]

Thank you, Michael. Michael cost everyone.

[John Oliver]

President Bush and his wife Laura were able to escape their political problems yesterday at the White House's traditional Easter celebration, complete with adorable kids, fun egg related Games. And my God, behind you, the rabbits. Look out. Look out for the. Oh, I'm so. Thought those were giant killer bunnies. The first lady kicked off the festivities in Washington.

[Samantha Bee]

We know that spring has arrived when

[John Oliver]

the White House lawn is filled with

[Samantha Bee]

children for the Easter egg hunt.

[John Oliver]

And summer in Washington is heralded by the vile, sulfurous stench of the unfound eggs. Fall. Fall, of course, brings the locusts. The terrible, terrible locusts, which give way to the icy death grip of winter. The hunt is on. Her remarks were interesting, but not as interesting as what the bunny was saying behind her. I think we also have that audio in Washington.

[Samantha Bee]

We know that spring has arrived.

[John Oliver]

Wrap it up, lady. It's hot as hell in this thing

[John Hodgman]

and I gotta open a Chuck E.

[John Oliver]

Cheese in a half hour. So an innocent ritual, a blessed respite from politics. Or not. This year, an organized group of gay and lesbian parents lined up early for tickets because the event is traditionally first come, first serve. But not so this year. Only VIPs and Katrina victims were allowed in. During the morning session that the President was at, the gay and lesbian families were greeted by a different group, these fine Christian soldiers who enjoyed a traditional Easter gay yell.

[Michael Kosta]

That ain't right.

[John Hodgman]

It ain't okay to be gay.

[John Oliver]

Okay, how about that isn't right? It isn't okay to be da. I'm sorry. I'm a stickler for grammatically correct hate. Now, White House correspondent Samantha Bee attended the Easter egg roll. She joins us now. Samantha, I get that the President considers himself a social conservative, but he meets with the children of Katrina victims and says he just couldn't be there for the gay families. He couldn't have met with them. Why is that?

[Samantha Bee]

Well, he wanted to, John. I mean, there's nothing he would have liked more than meeting with these gay parents and their soon to be gay children. But Katrina victims get priority. It's only fair. He did help ruin their lives. The least he and Laura could do is let them keep the commemorative T shirts.

[Desi Lydic]

Thank you.

[Beth Littleford]

This is so much better than having a home.

[John Oliver]

Sam, the Katrina issue aside, it seems like to an outside observer that the President purposely didn't meet with the gay families and denied them entrance while he was there and only let them come in after he left.

[Samantha Bee]

Well, look, John, I mean, there is a sense in many parts of this country that the Easter egg hunt is a sacred institution and should be defined by one mother, one father, a kid, and a spoon.

[John Oliver]

Bible.

[Samantha Bee]

Bible is very clear on this, John. In the Garden of Eden, the Lord hid eggs for Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.

[John Oliver]

Sam the Garden of Eden is the Genesis story. Easter and Jesus resurrection.

[Samantha Bee]

Okay, you're splitting hairs, John. My point is God doesn't want gays finding eggs. I don't know how many more ways he can say it.

[John Oliver]

Sam I don't think that God did say that.

[Samantha Bee]

Okay, well, it's a slippery slope, John. Once you let gays into the Easter egg hunt, they'll want to be there for the turkey pardoning and they'll be at the White House menorah lighting. And do you really want to live in a country where gays get in to see that thing they for the Jews around Christmas? Frankly, I'd rather be dead, Sam. Yeah, I would.

[John Oliver]

I really think you're taking this a little too far. No.

[Samantha Bee]

Okay, let me make it simple, John. For 130 years, children in frilly dresses have bent over to push pastel colored eggs with dainty spoons across an impeccably manicured lawn. Be a shame to see that tradition be gayed.

[John Oliver]

John. Thank you very much. Samantha. Samantha.

[John Hodgman]

Samantha Bee Explore more shows from the Daily show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch the Daily show weeknights at 1110 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. USAA knows dynamic duos can save the day, like superheroes and sidekicks or auto and home insurance. With usaa, you can bundle your auto and home and with up to 10%. Tap the banner to learn more and get a'@usaa.com bundle restrictions apply.

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