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Jon Stewart
You're listening to Comedy Central. They're on their feet. Look at that.
Larry David
It's very humbling. Who's the worst guest you ever had on this show?
Jon Stewart
The worst.
Larry David
The worst. The absolute worst guest.
Jon Stewart
I've been here 10 years.
Larry David
I want to give them a run for their money tonight.
Jon Stewart
You think you could do that?
Larry David
I think I could try.
Jon Stewart
I had some bad guess.
Larry David
I really think I'm up to it, Bishop.
Jon Stewart
Desmond Tutu. Really drunk off his ass.
Larry David
Wow.
Jon Stewart
You know who was not good? Democratic Senate leader Harry Reid. We had him on the show and he was, like, in a coma.
Larry David
Really?
Jon Stewart
It was so weird. He. Are you familiar with him?
Larry David
I know. I know who the majority leader is. Yes.
Jon Stewart
If only you'd been in Times Square for us. He'd written a book about his life. I was asking him about his life, and it was literally as though I was telling him a story he'd never heard before. Look at the house you grew up in. And he was like.
Larry David
Well, I'm from Brooklyn.
Jon Stewart
Are you from Brooklyn?
Larry David
Yes.
Jon Stewart
Are you?
Larry David
No. I was just telling you about my life. I. I remember my life.
Jon Stewart
Yeah, you do remember your life. You're from Brooklyn.
Larry David
Yeah, but I could be worse than Harry Reid. We'll see.
Jon Stewart
I don't think you're going to be worse than Harry. Already I'm having a much better time.
Larry David
Is that right?
Jon Stewart
Already.
Larry David
Good.
Jon Stewart
How are you doing otherwise? Are you. You would like to be the worst guest? First of all, Curb youb Enthusiasm is a great show and I. But why lean back?
Larry David
Do you mind if I lean back? Does that bother you?
Jon Stewart
It doesn't bother me at all.
Larry David
How about my foot up over here?
Jon Stewart
I don't mind.
Larry David
Is that a problem?
Jon Stewart
It's not very sturdy.
Larry David
Are you jealous that I'm not wearing a tie?
Jon Stewart
I am somewhat jealous that you seem very fit. You almost seem athletic. You see, you have, like, an athletic build to some extent.
Larry David
Can I tell you something?
Jon Stewart
Please.
Larry David
People are a little surprised by my athleticism when they see it, when I demonstrate it. For example, if we were playing basketball and a guy like that, you wouldn't know what to do. You'd be stymied. I go around you so fast, you go, chief Larry David, he can play basketball.
Jon Stewart
Let me tell you why I would have been stymied if you had done that.
Larry David
Yeah.
Jon Stewart
Because I don't know. I don't play with a ball that small. You were doing the gesture. You were working with.
Larry David
Yes.
Jon Stewart
Could you be playing with a ping pong ball? You'd say, ha, ha. And I would be stupefied.
Larry David
So you feel if I went like that.
Jon Stewart
Yes. Now I feel we're playing that ball.
Larry David
That's hard to mime, though, because your hands go. Yes.
Jon Stewart
No, it's got no definite space, but please, put your feet up. Up. No one has. That is.
Larry David
Have you ever done this before?
Jon Stewart
No one. No one has put their foot up.
Larry David
Can I tell you something?
Jon Stewart
Yes.
Larry David
I'm a little concerned that I don't have the right sock length to do it. I'm going to try. I want to. Well, just let's. Let's look at the sock length, because.
Jon Stewart
What color are the socks? Also an issue.
Larry David
It's a beigy. But the thing is, you can't show any skin at all on, you know, ever in life. Right. When you cross your legs on a man, you can't do that. Let's see. I've got the sock length. Yeah. Yeah. I've got the sock length. Yeah. You.
Jon Stewart
You're very. You know what? I would say that you are, if I may.
Larry David
Yes.
Jon Stewart
Not just athletic. Aristocratic to some extent. I see you have a suede shoe. A suede sneaker.
Larry David
Okay.
Jon Stewart
That's very, very bourgeois.
Larry David
Wardrobe. I didn't pick it up.
Jon Stewart
Is that true?
Larry David
Yes. Wardrobe. Yeah. Everything I'm wearing is wardrobe. I still.
Jon Stewart
In your life, you have a person that picks out your clothes?
Larry David
No, I steal it from the show.
Jon Stewart
Oh, yeah.
Larry David
They buy it and I take it home.
Jon Stewart
What would you wear?
Larry David
This. This Wardrobe. Wardrobe.
Jon Stewart
All of it.
Larry David
Underwear. I got the underwear.
Jon Stewart
Would you have them do the underwear? Is that stepping up your relationship with wardrobe to a more intimate place to say to them, you know, I enjoy.
Larry David
Yeah, I could go Hanes 34. I could say that. Yes. I haven't done that.
Jon Stewart
Giving your druthers. Is this the outfit that you would or do you feel. Are you costumed, do you feel or in life? Is this your show? Are these your show clothes? And right after this, you're like, I can't wait to get this pullover off so I can put on my tuxedo. What would you do?
Larry David
I walk out of the house with this and I'll wear it all day.
Jon Stewart
Yeah, you'll stay with it.
Larry David
I'll stay with it.
Jon Stewart
You won't get a grass stain playing in the yard or anything.
Larry David
John, this is me. You're talking to me. But you know something? I'm not talking to you.
Jon Stewart
What?
Larry David
I'm not talking to you. That's not how you dress.
Jon Stewart
You're right. This is. You know what this is?
Larry David
Yeah.
Jon Stewart
This is. I Run a funeral parlor at night. And so I always dress there because when you see the families and they're obviously grieving and you don't want to show up obviously looking like a Balvy ball.
Larry David
Yeah. Can I do something now? As only a friend would, Please. Your collar's up a little bit.
Jon Stewart
Is that true?
Larry David
Yeah, yeah.
Jon Stewart
They were telling me that earlier. And it's. You know what that is, if I may say it.
Larry David
You got a runaway collar. Yeah.
Jon Stewart
No disrespect to you. It's a signal I send to my children every night. Let them know. I say, kids, watch your daddy. And if you see, I'm going to take one aspect of my clothing that is so sweet and I'm going to roll it up. Carol Burnett had this.
Larry David
Yes, I know.
Jon Stewart
I. I don't know what it is about talking to you, but I would like a piece of cake right now. I don't know what it is. I honestly feel like Passover is over. And now we're gonna have a piece of cake.
Larry David
Bring it out. Come on, let's nosh. Yeah.
Jon Stewart
I remember. You know, Saturday Night Live is grueling.
Stephen Colbert
Yeah. You hosted. You were great on the show.
Jon Stewart
I was tremendous. I was. Maybe I was so good. They said, don't, don't come back. You would shame the other hosts. But, you know, it's. I don't know if people realize the difficulty. You guys are putting on a 90 minute play. Yeah.
Stephen Colbert
That's a long show every week.
Jon Stewart
And it was crazy to see just the sets and the makeup and the costumes and the writing and just how much had to come together. Yeah, technically.
Stephen Colbert
And the crew never messes up. They never accidentally put up the hooker set for the president sketch.
Larry David
They never mess up.
Jon Stewart
Is that the error that everyone's trying to avoid?
Stephen Colbert
Nobody ever enters the Oval Office in a hamburger outfit. Always get it right.
Jon Stewart
Hamburger outfit in Oval Office. Done. I'm submitting it.
Stephen Colbert
You know what's so funny? When I was doing Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon, we started and then. And you were doing this and all this press, you know, this show's like so popular and exploded. And there'd be all these press things that said, like, Jon Stewart, America's best fake news anchor.
Jon Stewart
Sorry about that.
Stephen Colbert
And I was like, I'm kind of the only other fake news anchor. Cause Jimmy's like a sketch comedian and Colbert wasn't doing his thing yet. And I was like, dag, dag, America.
Jon Stewart
It's kind of a two man horse race at that point. But now you got Colbert nipping Out our heels. And I'll tell you what. I've seen that kid. He's the future of fake news.
Larry David
That's.
Jon Stewart
That's what I'm thinking.
Stephen Colbert
When I was at Second City, I was at Second City in Chicago back in the day. And when I first got there, I was a student. And Colbert and Steve Carell were on the main stage, and we used to go watch them all the time. And one of the two. I will not say which one was a notorious Ladies man. And I will not say which one.
Jon Stewart
Can I guess?
Stephen Colbert
Okay, but I'm not going to.
Jon Stewart
But let me guess. Neither was it.
Stephen Colbert
One of the two was very popular with.
Jon Stewart
Here's what I believe. I believe both could be flirtatious. I believe Colbert could seal the deal.
Stephen Colbert
I'm not going to say. I can't say.
Adam Sandler
I believe.
Jon Stewart
At the end of the day, Carell would say this. I don't want to go to Bennett's.
Stephen Colbert
You know, Colbert would be there with the acoustic guitar.
Jon Stewart
Exactly. He'd be up there with the. With the harpsichord. How you been?
Adam Sandler
I got. And I just. I came out here. I want to remember three things to tell you.
Jon Stewart
Tell me.
Adam Sandler
I can't remember any of it.
Jon Stewart
I can't remember any of it.
Adam Sandler
I got none. I got none. How are you, pal?
Jon Stewart
You look good. I'm doing very well. How is the. The corduroy seems thick. It seems thick for this.
Adam Sandler
I had corduroy pants on, too. And somebody said, don't wear corduroy and corduroy. So I switched it up. This is a whole new thing. My wife has been going out and getting me new clothes. Cause I look back at my old thing. You know, I've been on television a long time, and I've been wearing the same clothes literally on every show. So she went out and got me this corduroy shirt, this other flannel one, and a T shirt.
Jon Stewart
But see, I would. And again, this is nothing against the wife, but that is not. That's not a shirt you're wearing. That is clearly some sort of coat shirt hybrid. That's not.
Adam Sandler
This is in New York. Because I was going and she was being nice, and I knew I was going to be cold. Also, I don't try on things. I refuse to try on things. So, like, when I go to a store, she goes, hey, you want a. And I just get it. And then it's either too big or too tight, but I have to wear it anyways.
Jon Stewart
Cause now it does seem like underneath the new.
Adam Sandler
It's an older shirt.
Jon Stewart
Shirt, jacket or shacket.
Adam Sandler
But that's why I had it buttoned to cover the oldness, to show the wife respect.
Jon Stewart
That's the key to a happy marriage. It's those types of compromises.
Adam Sandler
Thank you.
Jon Stewart
At what point in that. Cause I've been married. We've been married probably around the same amount of. How long you been married?
Adam Sandler
I've been with the same girl, 14, and married about seven or eight, right?
Jon Stewart
Oh, very similar. I've been with my wife for about 15 years, married for 10, and I am just getting to the point where I don't have to change my outfits.
Adam Sandler
This is a new thing. She was cool about it in the beginning and then started realizing, you know, she dresses nice. And I have the two daughters who yell at me for not dressing nice.
Jon Stewart
Right.
Adam Sandler
So that became like a factor in the house. When I would come downstairs in the morning and all three of them would say, please don't. Then I said, all right, go get me some new stuff.
Jon Stewart
You know, you know what I get in the house. And this is new as well. Daddy, I don't like the way you smell.
Adam Sandler
That's not you. Their nose is stronger at that age. But yeah, no, no, my kid. If she'll say, brush your teeth a little better, Brush your teeth a little better and maybe I'll kiss you.
Jon Stewart
That's nice, though. And also concern for your health because plaque, one of the bacteria, one of the leading causes of all kinds of distress, they're finding these days.
Adam Sandler
Absolutely.
Jon Stewart
So I very much. I appreciate that. That's nice of her to do that.
Adam Sandler
She loves her dad.
Jon Stewart
You say she, but only one loves the dad. The other. Cause you said there's three.
Adam Sandler
The other one is young enough to get past the stench and get right in there and start kissing me.
Larry David
Oh, that's nice.
Adam Sandler
The five year old that just goes. This is really horrific what I'm smelling right now.
Larry David
All right.
Jon Stewart
I appreciate, though, the use of the vocabulary. Horrific. And the.
Adam Sandler
That was giant. That was giant for the sandman.
Jon Stewart
Oh, is that true?
Adam Sandler
Horrific was as good as it gets. Horrific. And metamorphosis is a nice one.
Jon Stewart
That is a nice one.
Adam Sandler
That's all I got.
Jon Stewart
Are you gonna stick around and watch the Jet? I know you're a big Jet fan. Are you gonna around and watch?
Adam Sandler
I would like to see that. My kids want me to get back to la. They demand that I. I come home. I said, it's one extra day. If I could see the Jets Pats game, you can watch it on television. They said, so I'm going to go home.
Jon Stewart
And, and when was the last time you made a decision? That's a good one, Johnny.
Larry David
When? When?
Jon Stewart
I mean, I mean you're wrapped in corduroy. You can't watch. I like, you're like a shell of yourself. I mean it's, you're like a microwavable in that thing.
Adam Sandler
Here's what happens. My kids fall asleep maybe 9, 9, 8, 39. Maybe at 10 the wife falls asleep maybe 1 from 1 to 6. It like it's bananas. What goes on, you guys gotta see. I put on my old clothes and lay there.
Jon Stewart
Sandler.
Adam Sandler
Yep.
Jon Stewart
That's when the boys come over to the house.
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Larry David
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Summary of "TDS Time Machine | Jon Stewart Talks to Comedy Icons - Part 2"
Episode Release Date: February 18, 2025
Podcast: The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Hosts: Jon Stewart and The Daily Show News Team
In the second part of the "TDS Time Machine" series, Jon Stewart engages in lively and humorous conversations with iconic figures from the comedy world. This episode features interactions with Larry David, Stephen Colbert, and Adam Sandler, delving into their experiences in the entertainment industry, personal anecdotes, and light-hearted banter about everyday life.
Jon Stewart kicks off the episode with Larry David, exploring the challenges and memorable moments of being a guest on "The Daily Show."
The duo humorously discusses the dynamics of hosting and being a guest, highlighting moments when interviews don't go as planned.
A significant portion of the conversation revolves around personal style and wardrobe choices, with Larry David and Jon Stewart playfully critiquing each other's attire.
Larry David on Wardrobe:
Jon Stewart (02:04): "I am somewhat jealous that you seem very fit."
Larry David (02:12): "People are a little surprised by my athleticism when they demonstrate it."
Jon Stewart’s Fashion Choices:
Larry David (03:42): "Yes. Wardrobe. Yeah. Everything I'm wearing is wardrobe."
Jon Stewart (04:03): "Would they do the underwear? Is that stepping up your relationship with wardrobe to a more intimate place?"
Their dialogue showcases a blend of self-deprecating humor and camaraderie, shedding light on how personal style plays a role in their public personas.
The conversation shifts to the intricacies of producing a successful comedy show, with Jon Stewart reflecting on his time hosting "The Daily Show."
Challenges of Hosting:
Jon Stewart (06:00): "Saturday Night Live is grueling."
Stephen Colbert (06:04): "Yeah. You hosted. You were great on the show."
Production Insights:
Jon Stewart (06:27): "It's crazy to see just the sets and the makeup and the costumes and the writing and just how much had to come together."
Stephen Colbert (06:36): "And the crew never messes up. They never accidentally put up the hooker set for the president sketch."
The guests provide an insider's view of the demanding nature of live comedy production, emphasizing the meticulous planning and teamwork required.
As the episode progresses, Stephen Colbert and Adam Sandler join Jon Stewart, bringing their unique comedic perspectives to the table.
Their exchange highlights their roots in improvisational comedy and the impact of early experiences on their careers.
Sandler humorously discusses his reluctance to try on new clothes, the influence of his wife on his wardrobe, and the dynamics of dressing to please his family. The conversation delves into the humorous challenges of balancing personal style with family expectations.
These quotes encapsulate the playful and candid nature of the conversations, offering listeners a glimpse into the humor and rapport shared among the hosts and guests.
In this episode of "The Daily Show: Ears Edition," Jon Stewart masterfully orchestrates conversations that blend humor with insightful reflections on the comedy industry and personal lives. Through interactions with Larry David, Stephen Colbert, and Adam Sandler, listeners are treated to a behind-the-scenes look at the art of comedy, the importance of personal style, and the everyday challenges faced by comedy icons. The episode stands out for its engaging dialogue, relatable anecdotes, and the charismatic presence of its legendary guests.
**For more episodes, visit ParamountShop.com. Listen to "The Daily Show: Ears Edition" on your preferred podcast platform and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount+.