Trump Claims Iran War Is Won, But Hegseth’s New Recruitment Standards Say Otherwise | The Kid Mero

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Episode: Trump Claims Iran War Is Won, But Hegseth’s New Recruitment Standards Say Otherwise | The Kid Mero
Date: March 26, 2026
Host: Josh Johnson, with Desi Lydic & Kid Miro
Guest: The Kid Mero (comedian, radio host)

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Episode Overview

This episode dives into U.S.–Iran war updates—focusing on Trump’s conflicting declarations of victory, Iran’s refusal to accept a ceasefire, and bizarre new U.S. military recruitment standards under Pete Hegseth as the U.S. struggles for fresh recruits. The show lampoons the current state of military policy, politicians’ cringe-inducing attempts at podcasts, and closes with an engaging, funny, and heartfelt interview with Bronx-raised radio icon The Kid Mero, covering New York’s radio culture, radio vs. podcasting, and supporting homeless youth.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Trump Declares Premature Victory in Iran War

• Segment: [01:22–05:52]
• Trump claims the Iran war is “already won,” but Iran rejects the U.S. ceasefire and insists the war will end on their terms.
• Despite Trump’s claims, more U.S. troops are being deployed to the region—a contradiction to the supposed “victory.”
• The confusion is expertly satirized by Josh and the team, playing up the absurdity of “winning” a war while simultaneously escalating troop presence.

Memorable Moment:

Josh Johnson: “You don’t like to say you won a war. Isn’t that why you fight a war? Be proud of yourself, Mr. President, you ended another war—and this is the one that you started.” [04:19]

2. U.S. Military’s Desperate New Recruitment Standards

• Segment: [05:52–11:23]
• The Army is raising the maximum enlistment age from 35 to 42, and relaxing standards around prior marijuana use.
• Pete Hegseth extends deadlines to reinstate ex-service members discharged for refusing the COVID vaccine.
• Josh and the team lampoon the desperation in lowering standards for recruits (joking that “anyone” is now eligible, including stoners and even “13-year-old Jewish boys” post-Bar Mitzvah).

Notable Quotes:

Josh Johnson: “So you gave people a deadline to reenlist and they didn’t take it. And now you’re still extending the deadline to get them back. You are not the one with power.” [08:13]

Josh Johnson: “Now for completely unrelated reasons, the US military is lowering its standards. Cause we need a ton of troops… Uncle Sam needs literally anyone.” [10:19]

3. Politicians Flop at Podcasting & Social Media

• Segment: [12:32–19:36]
• Recaps cringe-worthy efforts by politicians (Joni Ernst’s “McFlurry” puns, Andy Beshear’s unauthentic “cast rules”, Ted Cruz recounting first dates at James Coney Island and even singing live).
• Mockery of bi-partisan cluelessness when attempting to reach voters online.

Memorable Moments:

Desi Lydic: “Oh, nothing is less authentic than you calling someone boo. That’s a word for black women and gay men in 2011. Why can’t you just talk like a real human being?” [16:16]

Desi Lydic (on Ted Cruz singing): “Well, Ted, your shirt might have been wet, but I promise you, your date was not.” [17:51]

• Concludes with an earnest plea to politicians:

  Desi Lydic: “If you’re a politician looking to reach people and think you need to start a podcast—don’t. Please don’t.” [18:56]

4. Interview: The Kid Mero—New York Radio, Culture, & Community

• Segment: [21:32–34:46]
• Origins & Style: Mero reflects on his journey from Bronx kid listening to Hot 97 to becoming the host, describing the cultural shift and personal impact:

  Kid Miro: “Going from being a kid listening to it in the back of a car, doing things as a teenager my mom would not approve of… then being the guy on the mic is crazy.” [23:12]

• Radio vs. Podcasts: Discusses the differences, authenticity, structure, and interaction. Radio offers more curated experience and frenetic live calls; podcasts are “vibey” and often less structured.
  • Hilarious anecdotes about the oddest early morning callers.

  Kid Miro: “The 6am callers are not like the 9am callers… If you’re calling Hot 97 at 6am, it’s either for your shift, you’re a billionaire (which is a lie), or you might be a psychopath.” [25:33]

• Engagement: Attributes listener openness (sometimes oversharing, like confessions about drug use) to his own charismatic upbringing and experience dodging trouble.
• Hot 97 Legacy: Feels both the urge to innovate and a responsibility to honor the station’s roots by uplifting NYC voices.
• Timberland Boot Lesson: Kid Mero gives Josh a crash course in “how to tie Timbs the New York way”—embracing messy style and using double-soled (not “boneless/nugget”) Timbs.

  Kid Miro: “If you got single sole Timbs, it’s like a McDonald’s chicken nugget—with no sauce.” [32:13]

• Activism: Mero is a vocal supporter of Covenant House, a charity for homeless and at-risk youth in NYC/NJ, connecting it to his background as a teacher and Bronx upbringing.

  Kid Miro: “Them helping kids and teens get their feet under them, get housing, get education, get food… It’s amazing—I do whatever I can for them.” [34:33]

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Notable Quotes & Time Stamps

• Josh Johnson:
  “Should I or shouldn’t I go to Times Square in my sailor outfit to kiss random women? Mr. President, I thought we won.” [05:38]

• Desi Lydic:
  “Joanie, Joanie, Joanie, don’t do that. You’ve lost all your McDignity. Your kids are gonna stop MC talking to you.” [13:21]

• Kid Miro:
  “I got five stars on WikiFeet, y’all.” [33:05]

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Important Timestamps

• Trump's 'Victory' and War Reality Check: [01:22–07:44]
• Military Lowers Standards/Recruitment Ads Parody: [07:44–11:23]
• Indecision Analysone – Politicians’ Podcasts: [12:32–19:36]
• Interview: The Kid Mero (Hot 97, NYC culture, activism): [21:32–34:46]
• Timberland Boot Demo: [29:00–33:14]

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Overall Tone & Takeaways

The episode is sharp, fast-paced, and irreverent—perfectly blending biting satire, pop-culture references, and real policy issues. The comedic skewering of U.S. military policy and political media blunders offers insight beneath the laughs. The Kid Mero interview showcases the heart and humor of New York, with an authentic perspective on community, legacy media, and giving back.

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Summary for New Listeners:
Even without listening, you’ll get a sense of this episode’s playful takedowns of bizarre political theater, genuine affection for New York radio, and the resilient optimism of community advocates like Kid Mero. If you want political comedy with depth—and to learn how to properly lace your Timbs—this is an episode for you.

Transcript

[Josh Johnson]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart choice. Make another smart choice with Auto Quote Explorer to compare rates for multiple car insurance companies all at once. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance and affiliates not available in all states and situations. Prices may vary on how you buy Monster Energy.

[Kid Miro]

Everybody knows White Monster, Zero Ultra, that's the OG it kicked off this whole zero sugar energy drink thing, but Ultra is a whole lineup now. Now you've got Strawberry Dreams, Blue Hawaiian Sunrise and Vice Guava. And they all bring the Monster Energy punch. So if you've been living in the White can branch out. Ultra's got a flavor for every vibe, and every single one is Zero Sugar. Tap the banner to learn more. You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central. It's America's only source for news. This is the Daily show with your host, Josh Johnson.

[Josh Johnson]

Welcome to the Daily Show. I'm Josh Johnson. We got so much to talk about tonight. Politicians somehow make podcasts even worse. Pete Hegseth has a thing for older men. And Trump declares victory prematurely. So now Iran's gotta pretend to finish, too. So let's get into the latest updates on the war in Iran. Nothing bad can happen.

[Kid Miro]

It can only good happen.

[Josh Johnson]

The war in Iran is everywhere. It comes up in financial news because of its effect on oil. It comes up in celebrity news like when chaperone's bodyguard made the ayatollah cry because he looked at her. And now the war is even creeping its way into the weather.

[Kid Miro]

Our eyes right now, weather wise, are in the Middle east because they have an unusual system that's developing. Gonna be bringing heavy rain, possible tornadoes. They could be looking at some haboobs developing.

[Josh Johnson]

Excuse me, Al, what did you just say? Her boobs. Her boobs are developing. Al, be a professional, all right? Call them by their scientific name, habrestices. Am I the only one who doesn't know what he's talking about?

[Kid Miro]

And that's your latest weather tonight. To be clear, I just learned something new. What exactly is a haboob?

[Josh Johnson]

Thank you, Craig Melvin. Very brave to admit on live TV that you've never seen a haboob, let alone felt one. I'm right there with you, brother. All right, so what is it? It is a massive dust storm.

[Kid Miro]

If you remember Mission Impossible. Tom Cruise running after that storm, ahead of that storm.

[Josh Johnson]

That's a haboob. See, now I get what you're talking about. I would understand the news a lot more if they told me what Tom Cruise movie it pertains to, I need them on the news. Like what America is doing here is like an impossible mission, like Tom Cruise in the movie Magnolia. So now we all understand haboob means sandstorm. So you can keep your mind's eye the gutter. And. And just so you know, after the haboob, there will be a bukake of rain coming around. These are all weather terms, but okay, aside from this dust storm developing into a voluptuous woman, how's the war going? President Trump in the Oval Office yesterday said he's already won the war.

[Kid Miro]

Well, I think we're gonna end it. I can't tell you for sure.

[Josh Johnson]

You know, I don't like to say this.

[Kid Miro]

We've won this. This war has been won.

[Josh Johnson]

You don't. You don't like to say you want a war. Isn't that why you fight a war? Be proud of yourself, Mr. President, you ended another war and this is the one that you started.

[Kid Miro]

Like,

[Josh Johnson]

That's like double points, you know? But you heard the man. We won this war. I bet Iran's begging for a ceasefire right now.

[Kid Miro]

Breaking news. Iran's state backed media now says Tehran will not accept a ceasefire.

[Josh Johnson]

Iranian official's quote is that Iran will end the war when it decides to do so, when its own conditions are met.

[Kid Miro]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Josh Johnson]

You can't end the war. We ended the war. All right, you trying to start another war? Cause I'll fight you and then I'll stop fighting you when I feel like it. Cause the war is over. You heard the President. We won. We're bringing the troops home. More than 1,000 additional troops from the 82nd Airborne Division are heading to the Middle East. They'll be joining thousands more Marines, sailors, and other American troops already on their way. Oh, shit. We're sending more troops? That doesn't sound like the war is over. This is very confusing. Should I or shouldn't I go to Times Square in my sailor outfit to kiss random women? Mr. President, I thought we won.

[Kid Miro]

We've won. Let me say we've won.

[Josh Johnson]

Of course we won. Those troops are obviously going there to help set up for the victory party. You know, you ever try to set up a bouncy castle with just 1,000 troops? Now that's an impossible mission, like Tom Cruise and Jerry Maguire. And besides, 1000 troops isn't even that many. It's actually the lowest thousands of troops you can have. If this war was really ramping up, the army would need a lot more People than that, you know, they'd probably be trying to get new recruits.

[Desi Lydic]

The US army making some changes to try and draw more recruits. The army just increased the maximum enlistment age to 42.

[Josh Johnson]

That's up from 35. Oh, shit. We're letting 42 year olds sign up for the military now? They're gonna have to change the name from Operation Epic Fury to Operation why does my back Hurt? I must have slept on it funny. Because the likelihood of a 42 year old being great at war is like any person being great with nunchucks. Some people will be good, but most are gonna hurt themselves immediately. Bruce Lee. Incredible. My Uncle Conc. Are we sure we won? It's not even a little close.

[Kid Miro]

It's not a close battle. They're totally defeated.

[Josh Johnson]

I don't know what it is about you saying it a third time, but I believe you. All right? We gotta be winning this war. You wouldn't lie nonstop. You're the President.

[Kid Miro]

Look.

[Josh Johnson]

According to People magazine, and apparently the US military, 42 is the new 35. And that's probably all the soldiers were gonna need anyway. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced an extension

[Kid Miro]

to bring back service members who refused

[Josh Johnson]

the COVID 19 vaccine. We're extending this to make sure anybody that wants to take advantage of it has additional time to take advantage of it. Maybe you were waiting to see whether we meant it or not. We do. Oh, shit. That doesn't sound good when the Secretary of Defense is telling you I know you didn't wanna take the COVID shot, but what about getting gunshot? So you gave people a deadline to reenlist and they didn't take it. And now you're still extending the deadline to get them back. You were not the one with power. I've been through this entire thing before. My ex left me and I told her she'd be back in a week. And sure enough, a year later, I got a wedding invitation. So just to recap, the military is now trying to recruit middle aged people and anti vaxxers who don't even want to come back. As long as they're not trying to bring in anybody else, maybe we're winning this war.

[Desi Lydic]

The army also changing some regulations to let people enlist without a waiver if

[Josh Johnson]

they have a single conviction for possession of marijuana or drug paraphernalia. Okay, this is bad. This is. This is bad. We've been at war a month and you're already down to stoners. Like that Harold and Kumar movie. Mission Impossible 4 Ghost Protocol. We must be desperate because I'VE never seen a pothead take a puff and then be like, I want to somebody up. I wouldn't even trust a stoner with any mission. Unless that mission is. You need to locate the Ayatollah and tell him the greatest movie ever is Interstellar. I'm starting to think the war isn't won. And if we're still fighting, the army's recruitment videos are gonna get a lot more desperate. Great news, America. The President says we won the war. And now for completely unrelated reasons, the US military is lowering its standards. Cause we need a ton of troops under 18. We'll take you under 16. You're in 13 in Jewish. You're a man now. Mazel tov. Your grandpa will be so proud. And he'll be right with you because we're taking the olds. Drug conviction. No problem. Just gave birth. We'll take you both. Two lazy eyes. You can be a pilot. Why not? Uncle Sam needs literally anyone. Disney adults. Carnies, Trekkies, Canadians. Those grown men who are into My Little Pony. We'll take you no questions asked. Even though we have tons of questions. We'll even take stoners.

[Kid Miro]

Whoa.

[Josh Johnson]

How can it be Middle and East? So head to your local recruitment center. In fact, screw it. Just go straight to that base in Qatar and be all you can be. Or it just be.

[Kid Miro]

We'll take it.

[Josh Johnson]

When we come back, we'll catch up on all the podcasts you're gonna wanna ignore. Don't go away. Uh, are you stuck staring at your W2? Are tax refund worries holding you back? You probably have fom the fear of messing up the fix using TurboTax on Intuit credit Karma. They find every credit and deduction to help you get every refund dollar you deserve or your money back. It's time to overcome your fear of messing up and get your taxes done right. Start filing today in the credit Karma. Welcome back to the Daily Show. The midterm elections are just a few months away, so to analyze all the campaign stories, we turn to Desi Lydic in our indecision analysome.

[Desi Lydic]

I'm Desi Lydic. Let's get into the indecision analysone. Wait, guys, can we get rid of that hyphen? No. Sorry, the wrong nevermind. The midterm elections are a few months away and everyone knows the best way to reach young voters is through social media. That's why politicians like Senator Joni Ernst are cranking out content. And it's going about as well as you think. There is a McFlurry of folks that are rushing to the Golden Arches to feast on fast food paid for with food stamps provided by snap. It may sound crazy, but I'm not McRibbing you. Oh, Joanie, Joanie, Joanie, don't do that. You've lost all your mcdignity. Your kids are gonna stop MC talking to you. Also, nothing says I've definitely been to McDonald's like pairing the visor with vintage Chanel. So relatable. But of course, aging Republicans would struggle with social media. Democrats on the hand also struggle with social media. I know I should sleep, but the voices in my head go, sorry, I cannot hear you.

[Kid Miro]

I'm kind of busy.

[Desi Lydic]

Honestly, how did you get that wrong? That's the Lady Gaga song that uses real words. But if you watch those cringe fluencers and thought to yourself, I wish this was longer, then you're in luck, because politicians everywhere are getting into the podcast. Take Tim Burchett, Republican Congressman and King of the Hill character, who I'm sure has a podcast that delivers the gravitas and stature worthy of a U.S. congressman.

[Josh Johnson]

Welcome back to another episode of Tennessee Talks. Today, I'm very much honored to be joined by my good friend Bobby Alloway, who owns Alloway's Hot Rod Shop. What the.

[Desi Lydic]

Bobby Alloway, the owner of Alloway's Hot Rod Shop? Oh, no way Burchett can top that.

[Josh Johnson]

East Tennessee native. My good Buddy, Randall Turkey McNew. Turkey. Thank you, brother, for being here.

[Kid Miro]

Well, thank you.

[Josh Johnson]

Appreciate you so much.

[Kid Miro]

It's a pleasure having been here.

[Josh Johnson]

Yes, sir. And we got here Tater, his boy, who's with us.

[Kid Miro]

Oh, my.

[Desi Lydic]

You got Turkey and Tater. Did their boy Green bean casserole have a scheduling conflict? I have so many ques. What is going on here? Okay, why is the guy in the suit in the lawn chair and Tater and Turkey are in the high back leather chairs? By the way, I love the wide shot. The camera guy's like, hey, you want me to crop out their bare feet? No, no, no, no, no. Stay wide. People come for the tater, but they stay for the toes. But Republicans aren't the only racking up tens of listeners on the Internet. The Democrats have their own lightning in a bottle. Andy Beshear, the governor from my home state of Kentucky. Make me proud, Andy.

[Josh Johnson]

Hello, everybody, and welcome to the Andy Beshear Podcast. This is our pilot and first episode. To make sure that we provide that real show for you, we've made some ground rules. We call them the cast rules number One, be authentic. You be you. Boo.

[Kid Miro]

Oh. Oh, God.

[Desi Lydic]

You broke the rule while telling us the rule. Oh, nothing is less authentic than you calling someone boo. That's a word for black women and gay men in 2011. Why can't you just talk like a real human being?

[Josh Johnson]

Number two, talk like a real human being.

[Desi Lydic]

Yes. Yes, do that. Show us you can do that.

[Josh Johnson]

Now is the time for my Kentucky accent, where I talk about things that are going on that just aren't right or in my accent that just ain't right.

[Desi Lydic]

New people thought Kentucky didn't have robot technology. Andy, you're the most popular Democratic governor in the country. People love you. I am begging you, end your podcast before people discover your podcast. Finally, let's move on from someone with no Riz to someone with no Riz. Ted Cruz. He hosts the most popular podcast by a Republican, and it's got everything you never wanted.

[Kid Miro]

When I was in high school, my,

[Josh Johnson]

like, first date that I would take

[Kid Miro]

girls on was to James Coney island, right? And get, like, chili cheese dogs because

[Josh Johnson]

I can't stand people who are pretentious. And it's impossible to be pretentious when you've got, like, cheese dribbling down your shirt.

[Desi Lydic]

Well, Ted, your shirt might have been wet, but I promise you your date was not. Honey, no girl's gonna go to second base with you when they just watch you go to third base with your hot dog. But if you thought hearing Ted Cruz talk was insufferable, wait till you hear him sing.

[Josh Johnson]

A man's got a heart, hasn't he? Joking apart, hasn't he? Can a fellow be a villain all his life?

[Kid Miro]

All the trials.

[Josh Johnson]

Now, I'm not worried about it. I think you retire.

[Kid Miro]

I know it's better to settle down

[Josh Johnson]

and get meself a. And you remember it. Wife will cook and sew for you and come for you and go for you and go for you and nag at you. The finger. She will wag at you.

[Desi Lydic]

Thanks for coming in, but we're going to go in a different direction. Thank you.

[Kid Miro]

You can go.

[Desi Lydic]

I love how his co host was like, okay, that was good. You can stop now. Oh, there's more. There's more. Okay, let's settle in. I just know karaoke bars put up photos of Ted Cruz the way grocery stores put up pictures of shoplifters. So, look, the midterms are only a few months away. If you're a politician looking to reach people and think you need to start a podcast, don't. Please don't. Just don't, okay? Go out and connect with voters, talk to people. And above all, don't forget, talk like

[Josh Johnson]

a real human being.

[Desi Lydic]

Couldn't have said it better myself.

[Josh Johnson]

Thank you, Jesse. When we come back, the Kid Mural

[Kid Miro]

will join me on the show.

[Josh Johnson]

Don't go away.

[Kid Miro]

Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney Plus. Let's go get ready for a new case.

[Desi Lydic]

We're the greatest partners of all time.

[Josh Johnson]

New friends, Gary the snake and your last name, the snake Dream team. New habitats. Zootopia has a secret reptile population.

[Kid Miro]

You can watch the record breaking phenomenon at home. Zootopia 2 now available on Disney Plus. Rated PG. And right now you can get Disney plus and Hulu for just 4.99amonth for three months with a special limited time offer. Ends March 24th.

[Josh Johnson]

After three months, Plan Auto renews at $12.99 a month.

[Kid Miro]

Terms apply.

[Josh Johnson]

Going outside is so in. During Spring Fest at Lowe's. For a limited time, get extra big deals on select Holland Pavers. Three for $1 plus, save $70 on a char broil performance four burner grill now $179. And chef up shareables for your whole crew. Picture perfect patios and good food. Yes, please. Our best lineup is here at Lowe's, valid through 3:30, while supplies last. Selection varies by location. Paver offer excludes Alaska and Hawaii. Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight is a comedian, writer and host of Mornings with Miro on Hot Night 7 and the victory Light Podcast. Please welcome the kid Miro. Hey, man, thanks for being here.

[Kid Miro]

Thanks. Thanks for having me.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. You are an absolute, like, powerhouse institution of talking in my ear.

[Kid Miro]

My kids say that too, man.

[Josh Johnson]

Really?

[Kid Miro]

Yeah. Everybody by. My mother, by the way, spouse, everybody's like, you talk too much.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, I wasn't thinking that. I more just mean like, you enjoy it? Yeah, I love it. I love it. Thank you.

[Kid Miro]

I need to hear that sometimes. Yeah, 100% I need to hear that. No,

[Josh Johnson]

I'm a huge fan of it. Sometimes I'll even hope that when I say the thing in my head, it sounds like you. Like when I'm feeling extra confident, I sound like you.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

In my head.

[Kid Miro]

Yo, what up? Yeah, I'm Josh. What's good?

[Josh Johnson]

That's perfect.

[Kid Miro]

That's it for New York.

[Josh Johnson]

So I'm wondering, with Hot 97, with you taking over the show, there are a lot of people that are saying that it feels like New York radio again, you know?

[Kid Miro]

Yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

What do you think it is that you're bringing that makes it like, feel re New Yorkified.

[Kid Miro]

You know what it is? I think growing up listening to it as a kid, you know, growing up in the Bronx, listening to i97 every day. You know, I'm a elder millennial. You know what I mean? This is, you know. Yeah, shout out my elder millennials. That didn't. It wasn't. You didn't have an ipod. You had an MP3 player. You know what I'm saying? And, you know, since I didn't have MP3 player money, you know, we were listening to the radio, which was a cultural, you know, touchstone. And going from being a kid listening to it in the back of a car, doing things as a teenager that my mom would not approve of. That's why we're not saying it on air to then being the guy on the mic is crazy.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

It's like watching Superman save somebody and then being like, yo, Superman's like, yo, hold this cake. Yeah, yeah, you're the guy now.

[Josh Johnson]

So now, knowing what you know, do you get on the rail sometimes? Like, stop doing that in the back seat.

[Kid Miro]

I do. I leave you little hidden messages, man, on the side of it. I'm like, yo, stop. Stop that. Stop doing that. Yeah, don't call. Don't talk to your mother like that. You know?

[Josh Johnson]

So now, in this era that is so podcast heavy, what is it that you think radio provides for the listener that podcast doesn't?

[Kid Miro]

I think podcast is just, like. It's very vibey. You know what I mean? It's just like a vibe fest. It's just like if we just. If I just went up there and sat next to one of y' all and was just like, hey, what's up, man? How you doing? What'd you have for lunch, man? You know what I mean? Let's talk about it. And it's just. There's kind of like no real structure. Unless it's victory light, baby. We got mad structure over there. Okay, but, you know, it's kind of like this, where it's like, you know, you have. You know, you have a meeting, there's production that goes into it. There's more. It's structured. You know, I thought it was gonna be four hours of me just up there being like, yo, traffic on the FDR's bad. Yo, here's yo, yo, here's some new French Montana. I'm the Camaro. And it's not like that at all. Actually, podcasting is probably a little bit more exhausting because they're just going straight through, whereas radio, you know, you got a couple breaks here. You know an insane caller that you gotta dump. You know, you know, local law, commercials, you know, things like that. Top Dog law.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah,

[Kid Miro]

dog is crazy. Top Dog.

[Josh Johnson]

Now, do you. When you, when you're doing the show, are there calls that we haven't heard because they're so insane you can't air? Can you tell us about, bro?

[Kid Miro]

I had a lady call in and say, she said, mero, I love the show, man. I love the energy that you bringing. My name is Casey, I'm from Brooklyn, but if I hear that Mother Kendrick song one more time, I swear to God, I'mma do something crazy. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was like, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What do you mean by that? Like, you know, when you say something crazy, what does that mean? Are you gonna like, mix mayonnaise and ketchup or are you gonna murder somebody? Like there's a. You know. But yeah, no, there's been a lot of like. And then also just people that, like, the earlier it is, the weirder it is. Cause, like, the 6:00am callers are not like the 9:00am callerS.

[Josh Johnson]

No, that makes sense. That makes sense because for them, I think there's a reasonable amount of time that a person will stay awake and there's a reasonable amount of time a person will wake up. And I feel like the people who wake up super early, it's for three reasons. They either have to.

[Kid Miro]

Mm hmm.

[Josh Johnson]

They're on that made up billionaire schedule. There's no way billionaires are actually like, I just don't believe that. You have all the money in the world. You get up early.

[Kid Miro]

You get up. No, that's not true.

[Josh Johnson]

That's crazy.

[Kid Miro]

That is a lie.

[Josh Johnson]

So it's either they have to for their shift at their job, they're billionaires, or they might be psychopaths.

[Kid Miro]

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's usually the latter.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

You know what I'm saying? If you're calling into Hot 97 at 6:00am so when you.

[Josh Johnson]

So when. So when it's 6:02 and you see

[Kid Miro]

the call button, I'm like, yo, pick it up, let's see who it is. They go, hey, this is John from Brooklyn. I'm blind in one eye, the weather is terrible. Who are you voting for in the midterms?

[Josh Johnson]

I'm like, I'm like, yo, my man,

[Kid Miro]

we're on the radio. Like, this is. Everybody's hearing this. This is not just. This is not. We're not Pen palate.

[Josh Johnson]

Do you think. Do you think it's because you, like, bring people in so well that they feel like they're just talking to you even when they're on the radio?

[Kid Miro]

I think so, man. I think so. And I think, honestly, like, it comes from having strict parents and having to spin out of trouble, you know, by being charismatic. You know what I'm saying? So making people feel comfortable enough to tell you. Yeah, yeah, I smoked crack before I got here. And I'm like, wow, you did not. You did not need to tell me that. That was between you and your provider.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. You know, it's a lot of you just taking sort of open confessions.

[Kid Miro]

Listen, I went to Catholic school. I was kicked out, you know, but now I know what the other side of the confessional booth feels like.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. And they went to, like, seminary. You were just being yourself.

[Kid Miro]

I was just out here. Yeah. I went to the bodega.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

You know, not the seminary.

[Josh Johnson]

And so with Hot 97 being such an institution, when you come in, do you feel like there's a lot of new stuff that you want to do, or do you feel the sort of responsibility to uphold what people are expecting?

[Kid Miro]

A little bit of both. You know what I mean? Because there is, you know, people like you said, like, oh, Meryl, you made New York sound like radio. Sound like New York again. And I'm like, thank you, guys. But there's also, you know, it's New York.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

It's a very eclectic city. So, you know, you got rappers that are, you know, mainstream, and then you got some that are not. I was trying to just highlight New York as a city, you know what I mean? Have, you know, people, like designers shout out to Daire de Rafa, like, just New York City kids. Cause I'm a New York City kid, so it feels good to me to kind of, like, uplift other people from the city and, like, kind of showcase them. Cause there's a lot of talent out here.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah, absolutely. Wow.

[Kid Miro]

Okay.

[Josh Johnson]

You being a New York City kid. Yeah, right. And me having made 10 years living in New York,

[Kid Miro]

that means you get free health insurance forever.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, that's good to know. Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah. I had a request at Penn Station, though. At Penn Station.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, health insurance at Penn Station. Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

From a random guy who's gonna have

[Josh Johnson]

no health insurance at all.

[Kid Miro]

You're insuring the opposite of your health.

[Josh Johnson]

I have a special request. I'm 10 years in New York, and I. I've never owned Timbs before.

[Kid Miro]

Never? Never.

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. Never.

[Kid Miro]

Not even in this what would they call it? A bomb cyclone?

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. No, Tim's in a bomb. I bought some Tims.

[Kid Miro]

Okay.

[Josh Johnson]

And I'm hoping that you can show me how to tie them New York way.

[Kid Miro]

Yes, okay. Absolutely.

[Josh Johnson]

100% right.

[Kid Miro]

Yes.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

Boom. All right, so you see how you have all the Of.

[Josh Johnson]

Of these.

[Kid Miro]

I believe they're called eyelets.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

You know what I mean?

[Josh Johnson]

Yep.

[Kid Miro]

You would think I have to use all of these. You don't. You know, you just go across the first row like that.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay, let's see the first row. All right?

[Kid Miro]

And you hold it up, make sure it's even. Right?

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

And then, you know, give me a number from one through four.

[Josh Johnson]

One through four?

[Kid Miro]

Yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

Three.

[Kid Miro]

Three. All right, so let's go on the third eyelet. Let's go on the third one.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

Move another one around.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

All right. And now. So now we're just gonna follow that pattern. We're gonna skip.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, we're just gonna skip. Okay. Got you. Wow. What if I had said four?

[Kid Miro]

You know what I mean? Then it. You know. Cause realistically, you're not even supposed to tie these. You know what I mean? You're not. You're not. You're not demoing a house. You know what I mean? You're just standing in front of the building, so, you know, and the tongue has to be very elongated. You know what I'm saying?

[Josh Johnson]

Right there. Get it out.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah, yeah. The less neat it looks, the. You know.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, really? Okay.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay. 100.

[Kid Miro]

Cause you're supposed to buy them tight. It's how you show that you're a wealthy person in New York City.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay, so you.

[Kid Miro]

I buy one of these every season.

[Josh Johnson]

And then the tongue. Is it true that the tongue's like,

[Kid Miro]

kind of like, you know.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

You know. You know when you can. Like when you're, like when you're in the back of an Uber, you're real up and you're like. You're breathing through your mouth. You're like. That's what the tongue should look like. Very relaxed.

[Josh Johnson]

Got you. So the. Cause the Uber thing hasn't happened to me per se, but, like, not yet. Yeah. Yeah. Let me see. Okay. So really, really, like, laid back, like. Yeah.

[Kid Miro]

You know what I'm saying?

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

And this always stays on. You would probably think that this comes off. It does not. It's a badge of honor.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay. You know what I mean?

[Kid Miro]

You could. You write free whoever you know that's in jail.

[Josh Johnson]

All right?

[Kid Miro]

You go, whoever your girlfriend's name, you

[Josh Johnson]

know, your dog If I write my girlfriend's name, will they think she's in jail?

[Kid Miro]

Bonus. Bonus points. And also shout out to you because you got actual Timbs, the double soled Tims.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay?

[Kid Miro]

Oh, yeah. Yes. That is very important. You know, you don't want to have the boneless Timbs out here, you know?

[Josh Johnson]

Why are they called boneless?

[Kid Miro]

Cause they don't have the. This is the bone. Right?

[Josh Johnson]

Yeah. Gotcha.

[Kid Miro]

You know what I mean? And then this is just breading, you feel me?

[Josh Johnson]

So if I got the other ones, they'd be like nuggets.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah, it would be a McDonald's chicken nugget.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

With no sauce.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, geez. So dry.

[Kid Miro]

No. Yeah, very dry. Don't do the single soul Tim's, y'. All. If you're here. If you came here to watch Josh do his thing and you're on vacation in New York City, he said no. Kid Marrow said to buy some Tims. Don't do the single bingles.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay?

[Kid Miro]

Get the double sold.

[Josh Johnson]

Amazing.

[Desi Lydic]

Thank you.

[Josh Johnson]

Thank you so much. And so when I. When I actually step into them, it's okay to just have the tongue out

[Kid Miro]

all over the place.

[Josh Johnson]

Let people see some ankle.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

Show it off a little bit.

[Kid Miro]

Roll your jeans up a little bit, you know?

[Josh Johnson]

So this is about showing foot.

[Kid Miro]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Johnson]

Okay.

[Kid Miro]

Yeah, it's very lucrative. Yeah, I didn't realize that it's very lucrative.

[Josh Johnson]

No, there's a lot of money in showing off feet.

[Kid Miro]

Listen, I am. I got five stars on WikiFeet, y'. All.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, well, thank you so much for this.

[Kid Miro]

This is.

[Josh Johnson]

I got the knowledge now and everything. So you are a powerhouse advocate for Covenant House of New York and New Jersey. Can you tell people what Covenant House does?

[Kid Miro]

So Covenant House, shout out to Pam Sandonado. Covenant House is a charity that works with unhoused youth. Okay? So kids who are on the street, you know, have no place to go, essentially, you know, homeless, you know. Really? I said unhoused. Cause that's like, the new cool way to say homeless. Homeless. But, you know, homeless seats, basically. And growing up, you know, having friends who were in shelters who, you know, and then being a teacher later on in life, you know, having students who would come in every day, and I'm like, damn, why are you so tired, bro? Like, why? And it's like, oh, I didn't sleep last night. You know, I slept in a shelter, like, or I slept in a dangerous situation, or I didn't sleep at all. So, you know, that kind of hits home to me. So. So them helping kids and teens kind of like get their feet under them, get housing, get education, get food, get the things they need to, like, you know, become productive members of society. You know what I mean? It's amazing, you know, So I do whatever I can for them.

[Josh Johnson]

Absolutely.

[Kid Miro]

Anytime. Whatever they need, I got them.

[Josh Johnson]

Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you so much for being here with me. Thank you.

[Kid Miro]

It's wonderful to have you.

[Josh Johnson]

Thank you. Moyes with Miro Monday through Friday from 6am to 10am on Hot Night 7, the Kid Mural. We're gonna take a quick break, but

[Kid Miro]

we'll be right back after this. Thank you so much.

[Desi Lydic]

So good, so good, so good.

[Josh Johnson]

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[Desi Lydic]

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[Josh Johnson]

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[Desi Lydic]

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[Josh Johnson]

Join the NordicLub to unlock exclusive discounts. Shop new arrivals first and more. Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite Rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.

[Desi Lydic]

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[Josh Johnson]

That's our show for the night. Now here it is, your moment of Zen.

[Desi Lydic]

While many are making their way to their destinations, the they'll see ICE agents walking around the terminals at Newark Airport.

[Josh Johnson]

Oh, they're right there. All right.

[Kid Miro]

They're good.

[Josh Johnson]

They're here to help.

[Kid Miro]

They're not bothering nobody. As long as they can check my bags and get me on my flight, I'm good to go, right? I want to get to the Bahamas. I want to out of here. Explore more shows from the Daily show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch the Daily show weeknights at 1110 Central on Comedy Central. Schedule and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount.

[Josh Johnson]

Plus,

[Kid Miro]

This has been a Comedy Central podcast.

[Josh Johnson]

Quick pause. Something useful for you. Love fishing. TikTok isn't just for young people. It's full of real tips, better knots, better baits, better catches. Quick videos from people who actually fish. Download TikTok now.