Trump's Pervy Epstein Bday Card Released & MAGA Allies Run Cover | Patrick McEnroe

Summary

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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Episode: Trump's Pervy Epstein Bday Card Released & MAGA Allies Run Cover | Patrick McEnroe
Date: September 10, 2025
Host: Michael Kosta (with The Daily Show News Team)
Guest: Patrick McEnroe

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OVERVIEW

This episode of The Daily Show dives into recent revelations from the Jeffrey Epstein scandal, specifically addressing the release of a bizarre birthday card from Donald Trump to Epstein. The show lampoons the denials by Trump and his allies and explores how the MAGA ecosystem responds to such controversies. The second half pivots to sports, featuring an extended and lively interview with renowned tennis analyst and commentator Patrick McEnroe, exploring both the U.S. Open and broader themes in tennis.

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MAJOR SEGMENTS & KEY INSIGHTS

1. The Trump–Epstein Birthday Card Scandal (00:30–12:31)

• Context and Setup:

  • Michael Kosta introduces "the very normal and not shady handling of the Epstein files" and riffs on the improbability of what’s happening in the Trump–Epstein narrative.
  • The show highlights Ghislaine Maxwell’s lack of memory about Trump's involvement and notes her suspicious transfer to a cushy minimum-security prison after speaking with DOJ officials.
    • Quote [03:03]: "Come on, guys... Did you have to do the quid pro quo that fast? You could have at least waited a week..." — Michael Kosta

• Card Release and Media Response:

  • The Epstein estate releases the actual birthday card from Trump to Epstein.
  • Description of the card: A caricature of a woman's body and a cryptic, suggestive message: “We have certain things in common, Jeffrey. Enigmas never age. Happy birthday, and may every day be another wonderful secret.”
    • The signature—crudely placed below the figure’s waist—matches Trump’s distinctive autograph.
    • Quote [04:56]: "The future president’s signature is a squiggly Donald below her waist, mimicking pubic hair." — Michael Kosta

• Deniers and Signature Analysis:

  • The White House denies Trump wrote or signed the card. Eric Trump chimes in: "I've seen my father sign a million things. This doesn't look like his signature..." (06:22).
  • The Daily Show mocks the denial, juxtaposing the signature with historical Trump signatures that are clearly identical.
    • Quote [07:19]: "You’ll see all the basic shapes are exactly the same... It’s his signature. It’s his signature." — Michael Kosta

• Republican Deflections:

  • The GOP rushes to defend Trump, deflecting with reference to “auto pens” and, humorously, Joe Biden.
    • Quote [08:31]: “Anybody can do a signature. We’ve seen the auto pen has been used quite a bit with the Biden administration.” — Congressman Tim Burchett (paraphrased by Kosta)
  • The comedy draws a parallel between desperate GOP responses and the absurdity of the situation.

• Second Card & Social Context:

  • Another card from Epstein’s collection is revealed, referencing a “fully depreciated woman” and a fake check from Trump—a grotesque inside joke among Epstein’s circle.
    • Quote [10:05]: “I am shocked and frankly disgusted that Joe Biden’s auto pen did this also...” — Michael Kosta

• Memorable Comedy Bit:

  • Satirical ad for “Trump greeting card collection” pokes fun at the scandal and Trump’s penchant for merchandise (“Make America Greet Again”).

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2. SportsWar: US Open & Sports News (13:17–20:23)

• US Open Recap:

  • Michael Kosta and Roy Chang discuss recent audience behavior at the U.S. Open: "People are starting to drink honey deuces at 11 am. So I think it’s just New York." — (14:38)
  • Grand Slam tournaments reflect their host country’s personality—U.S. Open is rowdy; Wimbledon is stuffy; Australian Open “the ball spins the other way.”
    • Quote [15:04]: "We're loud, we're drunk. We're spending $6,000 a month to share one bedroom with four nonbinary tattoo artists, all named Devin." — Roy Chang

• Tennis Etiquette:

  • Kosta, a former professional tennis player, laments rude crowds and noise during matches, favoring the sport’s traditional decorum.

• NFL Opening Week:

  • Focus on Jalen Carter’s ejection for spitting on Dak Prescott: “Between the blood and the brain matter, spit is the cleanest liquid on the field.” — Roy Chang (17:17)

• Artificial Intelligence in Minor League Baseball:

  • Oakland Ballers use an AI manager and win; both hosts debate the pros and cons of AI in sports.
  • Kosta is wary, Chang embraces the evolution: “First, it was the curve ball, then it was black people, now it’s AI.” — Roy Chang (19:19)

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3. Interview: Patrick McEnroe on Tennis, the US Open, and the Sport's Evolution (21:29–41:14)

• Early Family Tennis History:

  • Patrick grew up in Queens, following his older brother John McEnroe into tennis after a coach recognized John’s talent.
    • Quote [24:27]: “He saw John at the tryouts and said... We're going to give him a scholarship. He's going to be number one in the world.”

• Personal Achievements and Sibling Rivalry:

  • Patrick reminisces about his ranking: "I didn't even know they ranked people that high..." — Patrick to Michael Kosta (22:38, joking about Kosta’s 860th ranking).
  • Talks about being world #28 in singles and #3 in doubles.

• US Open (Men’s): Sinner vs. Alcaraz Era:

  • McEnroe describes the new men’s rivalry: Carlos Alcaraz (Spain) vs. Jannik Sinner (Italy).
    • “I've never seen two guys play at this type of speed and tempo… these guys were raising the bar.” (25:48)
  • He highlights Alcaraz's charisma, versatility, and the intense rivalry: each player pushing the other for improvement.

• US Open (Women’s): Amanda Anisimova’s Redemption:

  • American Amanda Anisimova bouncing back from a brutal loss (6-0, 6-0) in a major final to defeat her rival later—sparking discussions of resilience and mental health.
    • Quote [30:14]: “She handled that with a lot of grace... She left the court for a couple minutes to gather herself. She came back, was really appreciative, and I think she... faced it head on.”

• Mental Health & Endurance in Tennis:

  • The growing openness in discussing athlete mental health ("I think it's really healthy that players are not shy about discussing it… Amanda’s a perfect example", 32:23).
  • Tennis teaches you to deal with loss and independence: “Most of the time you get your ass kicked, even when you're number 28 in the world.” — Patrick (38:46)

• US Open’s Changing Culture & Commercialization:

  • The shift from a pure tennis event to entertainment spectacle: “US Open has become more about the show, the entertainment value…” — Patrick (34:07)
  • Crowds are bigger, rowdier, sometimes at the expense of tennis tradition.

• American Men's Tennis Hopes:

  • Discussion on the long drought of American men’s champions; optimism about young players: “Taylor Fritz is the fourth or fifth best player on the planet, but he’s got Sinner and Alcaraz... before that, Djokovic, Nadal, Federer. That's the challenge.” — Patrick (37:18)

• Life Lessons from Tennis:

  • Both hosts reflect on what the sport taught them: resilience, handling failure, independence, and even (joking) lessons in cheating as kids.
    • Quote [40:54]: "Tennis really teaches you that independence you need... to be able to handle stuff on your own." — Patrick McEnroe

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NOTABLE QUOTES & MEMORABLE MOMENTS

• [03:03] Michael Kosta: "Did you have to do the quid pro quo that fast? You could have at least waited a week..."
• [04:56] Michael Kosta: "The future president’s signature is a squiggly Donald below her waist, mimicking pubic hair."
• [07:19] Michael Kosta: "...it's his signature. It's his signature. It's his."
• [10:05] Michael Kosta: "I'm shocked and frankly disgusted that Joe Biden's auto pen did this also."
• [15:04] Roy Chang: "We're loud, we're drunk, we're spending $6,000 a month to share one bedroom with 4 nonbinary tattoo artists, all named Devin."
• [19:19] Roy Chang: "First, it was the curve ball, then it was black people, now it’s AI."
• [24:27] Patrick McEnroe: "He saw John at the tryouts and said...We're going to give him a scholarship. He's going to be number one in the world."
• [30:14] Patrick McEnroe: "She handled that with a lot of grace...She left the court for a couple minutes to gather herself. She came back, was really appreciative, and I think she...faced it head on."
• [38:46] Patrick McEnroe: "Most of the time you get your ass kicked, even when you're number 28 in the world."
• [40:54] Patrick McEnroe: "Tennis really teaches you that independence you need...to handle stuff on your own."

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TIMESTAMPS FOR IMPORTANT SEGMENTS

• 00:30–12:31: Trump–Epstein Card Scandal & Media Circus
• 13:17–20:23: SportsWar (US Open fan behavior, NFL, AI in baseball)
• 21:29–41:14: Patrick McEnroe interview (family history, US Open, mental health, commercialization, American tennis)
• 38:46: Patrick’s reflection on the life lessons gained from tennis

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TONE & STYLE

As expected from The Daily Show, the episode blends sharp satire, factual analysis, irreverence, and candid interviews. The humor is self-aware and frequently cutting, but moments of genuine sports nostalgia and earnest reflection come through strongly in the McEnroe segment.

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CONCLUSION

This episode delivers a comedic yet incisive breakdown of the Trump–Epstein scandal, mocking the endless spin and denials with The Daily Show’s signature snark. The deep-dive interview with Patrick McEnroe offers tennis lovers rare insights—about top rivalries, mental health, and the changing face of professional tennis—while also maintaining the show’s fast-paced, irreverent style.

Listeners leave with a clear understanding of the Trump–Epstein news event’s absurdity and seriousness, as well as an appreciation for the high drama and humanity at the heart of world-class tennis.

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Transcript

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[Patrick McEnroe]

It's pretty boring stuff.

[Michael Kosta]

You might remember back in July, the Wall Street Journal released a bombshell report that Trump had given Jeffrey Epstein a creepy birthday card that suggested the two of them had a dark sexual secret. Although obviously any sexual secret is a dark sexual secret. No one's ever been like, don't tell anyone, but I like missionary. Now, of course, Trump completely denied this card even existed. And just to be sure, they even asked the woman who compiled all of Jeff Epstein's birthday cards. And luckily, she had 20 years of free time. The message is compiled by Epstein's accomplice, Ghislaine Maxwell, currently serving a 20 year federal prison sentence for sex trafficking. In a recent interview, she told Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche, the president's former lawyer, that she could not remember if Trump contributed a message to the book. Well, that sure is lucky for Trump. You know, he sent his deputy Attorney general to Privately talk with Ghislaine Maxwell while she's in a federal prison and she doesn't remember anything incriminating about him? Surprising. What a nice thing for her to say about the president without receiving anything in return. Right, right, right. Maxwell recently received a highly unusual transfer to a minimum security prison just days after her interview with the doj. Come on, guys. Come on. Did you have to do the quid pro quo that fast? You could have at least waited a week before. With the fence, you can just slide under. Look at this sign. What the kind of prison has a sign like that? Is this prison run by Texas Roadhouse? This looks like the sign for a church where the pastor plays an electric guitar. Also Camp Bryan. I think my parents took me there for vacation once when I was eight. That's the prison with the big water slide, right? It looks nice, but that place is brutal. Room Service stops at 10pm so there you have it. The media says there's a letter. Trump's people say there's not. So I guess we'll never know who's telling the truth.

[Carvana Salesperson]

Breaking news. For the first time, we are seeing an image of a letter signed by Donald Trump for Jeffrey Epstein's 50th birthday.

[Michael Kosta]

Okay, so we know who's telling the.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Truth.

[Michael Kosta]

But this is huge. Epstein's estate finally released the actual birthday card, and it's as creepy as you'd expect.

[Carvana Salesperson]

The drawing shows the outline of a woman's torso, breasts, and hips with a message that reads, in part, we have certain things in common, Jeffrey. And later, enigmas never age before the closing words. Happy birthday, and may every day be another wonderful secret.

[Michael Kosta]

The future president's signature is a squiggly Donald below her waist, mimicking pubic hair. Okay, okay, I know what we're all thinking. That's an excellent drawing, and I think Donald Trump might have a wonderful future as an artist. Look. Now, obviously, that's a crappy drawing, but as a student of history, one thing I've learned is when a certain type of person dreams of being a great artist, we should encourage that instead. Now, even without the drawing, that is a strangely cryptic birthday card. No. Enigmas never age. There's a wonderful secret. Although, to be fair, it could be totally innocent. We have certain things in common. Could mean anything. What are the things that we know about Epstein? He was a human trafficker. He was a pedophile. It could be any of those things. And I see why Trump's people denied that this card even existed. But now that we've all seen it there's nothing left for them to do except continue to deny it. The White House this morning flatly denying the President drew or signed the message.

[Carvana Salesperson]

The President did not write this letter. He did not sign this letter.

[Patrick McEnroe]

From what I see, it's not a signature. I've seen Donald Trump sign a million things.

[Michael Kosta]

This doesn't look like his signature to you? Nope. I can tell you my father does not sketch out card. Okay, okay. Hey, I'll give Eric Trump a pass. He has no way of knowing what a birthday card from his father would look like. But they're saying it's not Trump's signature. If only we had one to, I don't know, 1 million examples of his signature that we could compare it to.

[Carvana Salesperson]

The far left is the birthday book signature.

[Michael Kosta]

The one in the middle is a.

[Carvana Salesperson]

Trump signature from a 1999 letter to Larry King. And on the right is from a signed letter to Rudy Giuliani in 2001.

[Michael Kosta]

Or these from 1984 in a letter to the New York Times, 1995 to.

[Roy Chang]

A Palm beach official, 2014 in a.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Note to Keith Olbermann.

[Carvana Salesperson]

There's even an inscription in a Trump book that Epstein owned from 1997.

[Michael Kosta]

You'll see all the basic shapes are exactly the same. Yes, yes, I see. So if you look at the angle of the downward on the capital D, you can see that you don't have to do any of this shit. It's his signature. It's his signature. It's his. It is funny how they're fact checking one piece of evidence with another piece of evidence. These guys are like, if you look closely, Trump's signature on a birthday card to his pedophile best friend matches his signature on a note he wrote to his pedophile best friend. So we have his signature on this letter. It matches the signature on all of these other letters. Can you please just admit he signed the letter? Please just admit it. Do what's right, I'm begging you. About the Epstein case.

[Roy Chang]

Would the White House support a professional handwriting expert review of the document released yesterday to prove that it's not the President's signature?

[Carvana Salesperson]

Ms. Sure, we would support that. And in fact, I have already seen many forensic analysts of signatures coming out. I believe it was the Daily Signal that published a piece with three separate signature analysts who said that this absolutely was not the President's authentic signature?

[Michael Kosta]

Yes. No. Yes. I think we have a photo of the signature analyst who said this wasn't Donald Trump's. It's a credible source. It's a credible Source. This is actually embarrassing for you guys. Just denying it at this point is not enough. Does anyone in the GOP want to help Trump out here? Congressman Burchett. I mean, anybody can do a signature. We've seen the auto pen has been used quite a bit with the Biden administration. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about. Go from the signature to the auto pen to Joe Biden. But I bet you can get there quicker, though. Sure, these girls were underage, but you know who was overage? Joe Biden. Boom. Did it. Okay, so they. So they can't come up with a credible excuse, but the truth is, Trump can probably still wiggle out of this thing as long as new information stops coming up.

[Carvana Salesperson]

A second entry in the Epstein birthday book released yesterday appears to mention Donald Trump as well. The page was reportedly compiled by a member at Mar a Lago who included a photo of Epstein and others holding up a giant fake check purportedly from Trump to Epstein for 22,500 doll. The attached letter jokes that the check was payment for a deal in which Epstein sold Trump a quote, fully depreciated woman in 2003.

[Michael Kosta]

Wow. I am shocked and frankly disgusted that Joe Biden's auto pen did this also. But this is wild. This is wild. Trump was such a notorious creep that other people were. Were mentioning it in their birthday cards. I've never gotten a birthday card that was like, happy Birthday, Michael. Remember our high school gym coach who always let the girls have lunch in his office? That was crazy. Anyways, here's to another 40 more years, pal. Look, I'm not going to pretend that I completely understand whatever this gross inside joke is supposed to mean. All I know is it's very disrespectful to refer to someone as a fully depreciated woman. The correct term is a refurbished woman. Promax 13. But this. This whole Epstein birthday book has made me realize two things. One, this convicted sex predator got way nicer birthday cards than I've ever received in my entire life. I'm not a fan of the content, but you can't deny his friends put some real effort into it. On the way to my birthday dinner, my wife makes me stop at Walgreens so she can buy me a card. Sometimes it's not even a birthday card. Oh, thank you. I will have a great first communion. The second thing I realized is Trump is playing this thing all wrong. If he just admits that he wrote this card, everyone could move on. And then he could do one of his favorite things of all time. Find a way to make some money out of it.

[Comedy Sketch Voice]

You've seen stories about Donald Trump's perfect birthday card to Jeffrey Epstein. And thanks to the new Trump greeting card collection, you can send an equally perfect card for all of life's milestones. Congratulate the graduate in your life with the message, your future is bright, unlike our dark and hideous past, complete with a woman's body with pubic hair. And get ready for Mother's Day with a card that tells her, here's to a mom who did it all, including things that God can never know. And don't forget the pubic hair. And for the somber moments, we have comforting messages like, I'm so sorry for the death of your pedophile father. And for added respect, these cards have twice the pubic hair. So no matter the occasion, pick a card from the Trump collection and make America greet again. Donald Trump denies the existence of these cards. He's suing you for $10 billion.

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[Michael Kosta]

Welcome back to the Daily Show. I think I speak for everyone when I say politics drools and sports rules. For a full recap of the biggest stories in the world of jocks and straps, we turn to Sports War. Get ready for battle. It's time for Sports War, brought to you by gambling. Gambling, you're not losing money, you're winning debt. What's up, sports nuts? I'm Michael Kosta.

[Roy Chang]

And I'm Roy Chang. This is Sports War, the show where we are legally not allowed to agree with each other. So if I say defense wins championships.

[Michael Kosta]

Then I say defense loses lawsuits. And specifically in my DUI case, if they didn't want me to drive into that Dunkin Donuts, then why do they have that sign up that says drive thru? Okay. By the way, Ronnie, can I get a ride home?

[Roy Chang]

Yeah, fine. But you have to lay in the trunk like a kidnapping victim.

[Michael Kosta]

Thanks, bud. Let's start things off with the greatest sport on earth. Tennis. This past weekend. This past weekend was the final of the US Open. But it was what went down in the stands throughout the tournament that made the biggest headlines.

[Carvana Salesperson]

With the attendance at this year's U.S. open expected to shatter previous records, fans haven't exactly been acing tennis etiquette.

[Michael Kosta]

People are loud and chatty and moving about. People are complaining that all this alcohol is leading to bad fan behavior. How many have you had? Quite a few. These people are starting to drink honey deuces at 11am So I think it's just New York. That's the way it's always, always been.

[Roy Chang]

Hell yeah.

[Michael Kosta]

This is New York City. That's how it is.

[Roy Chang]

We're loud, we're drunk. We're spending $6,000 a month to share one bedroom with four non binary tattoo artists, all named Devin. This is what's great about these Grand Slam tournaments, okay? They take on the personality of their host country. The US Open is drunk and loud. Wimbledon is stuffy and inbred. And at the Australian Open, the ball spins the other way.

[Michael Kosta]

Wow, Ronnie. Wow. You sure love some crowd noise for someone who performs to complete silence. Look, I got nothing against people having a good time. You know me. I get invited to all types of parties. And it's not just because high school kids know I'll buy beer for them. Shout out to Chad and Jared. My point is different sports have different etiquettes. Tennis fans should be respectful and quiet, just like NASCAR fans should have jean shorts and a Yahoo email address. It's just standard practice. Take it from me, a former ranked professional tennis player ranked 864th in the world. It's true. Look it up. Yeah. Yeah. No one watching tennis wants to hear obnoxious drunk fans. They want to hear the sweet, sweet sound of players grunting. Oh, you know what I mean. Wow.

[Roy Chang]

I guess tennis players can get cte. Which brings us to our bad brain. Better than night. How many honey juice cocktails would someone need to drink to have as much brain damage as Michael Costa? Brought to you by gambling. Gambling problem. Call 1-800-.

[Michael Kosta]

Moving on. This was the opening week for the NFL, and things got off to a spit tacular start.

[Patrick McEnroe]

The NFL season kicked off last night between the Eagles and the Cowboys. And one of Philly's star players is in the spotlight for all of the wrong reasons. Defensive lineman Jalen Carter was ejected right after the opening kickoff for spitting on Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott.

[Michael Kosta]

Yo.

[Roy Chang]

Ejected for spitting. This is football, okay? Between the blood and the brain matter, spit is the cleanest liquid on the field. People don't tune into football to watch people being nice to each other. We tune in to see when that Fox robot will finally kill Terry Bradshaw.

[Michael Kosta]

Plus.

[Roy Chang]

Plus, the Cowboys should love this. Now that quarterback is all wet and slippery like a newborn baby. And harder to tackle like a newborn baby.

[Michael Kosta]

Come on, Ronny. This kind of behavior can't be tolerated. Players shouldn't be spitting on each other. They should be spitting only on the fans, particularly the ones who took the time to make signs asking for it. Pasta.

[Roy Chang]

You disgust me.

[Michael Kosta]

How much? Enough to spit on me. Which brings us to our lucky loogie bet of the night. What is wrong with me? As always, brought to you by gambling. Gambling your kids weren't going to college anyway.

[Roy Chang]

Let's move on to minor league baseball. It's a sport watched by people who don't know movies exist. But one minor league team is. Using some major league technology, artificial intelligence.

[Michael Kosta]

Made its professional sports debut over the weekend in Oakland.

[Carvana Salesperson]

Yeah, get this. The Ballers replaced their manager with an AI program, creating the lineups and recommending pitching changes. And they won. So we spoke with the team's previous manager, Aaron Miles, about being the first manager ever replaced by artificial intelligence.

[Michael Kosta]

Every person out here in a job that knows AI may be coming for their job doesn't like this at all.

[Patrick McEnroe]

You know what I mean?

[Michael Kosta]

And part of me thinks that, too. A part of you thinks it's bad that you'll be replaced by AI Stand up for yourself, man. AI can't replace you. Only a human being can spend nine innings in the dugout scratching his nutsack, going, good eye. Good eye, Ronnie. If you ask me, we need to ban all AI from sports.

[Roy Chang]

Kosta, that's the worst thing I've ever heard. And I've read the Gene Hackman coroner report, right? AI Is what baseball needs. This is how baseball works, okay? It's always evolving, and teams are always looking for an edge. I mean, first it was the curve ball, then it was black people, now it's AI plus, it's a statistics driven sport, okay? You think white people were ever gonna learn math?

[Michael Kosta]

Oh, oh, really? Oh, really? Oh, really? Taking a shot at white people? We don't know math. Well, maybe you can count these two. You're good. But my point remains. You don't need AI To. All you need is heart, determination, and a few good Dominican guys. Which brings us to our AI A bet of the night. What sacred American pastime will AI ruin next? As always brought to you by gambling, use promo code Costa for $100 in instant debt. And that's all the time we have for Sportswar. Join us next time where we will debate if rugby should be played on actual rugs.

[Roy Chang]

Of course not. Think of the cleaning fees.

[Michael Kosta]

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[Carvana Salesperson]

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[Michael Kosta]

Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight is a former professional tennis player, ESPN commentator, international Tennis hall of Fame president and host of Sirius XM's Holding Court. Please welcome Patrick McEnroe. No one's ever come out and done such an entrance, but also I know your game quite well. For you to open up with the forehand. Well, you know, your backhand.

[Patrick McEnroe]

I like to, I like to surprise you, Michael.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, I mean, I remember watching you and when the ball would go to the center of the court, you would run around a forehand and hit a backhand.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Very rare to see that nowadays. But you know what? That was my one shot. I said I had one shot. That made me a little. How much? What was your ranking again?

[Michael Kosta]

Well, I'm so glad you asked. I was ranking 860, my high. You were ranked?

[Patrick McEnroe]

I didn't even know they ranked people that high.

[Michael Kosta]

Your high was 28.

[Patrick McEnroe]

28 was a high?

[Michael Kosta]

Yes.

[Patrick McEnroe]

And do you know what it was in doubles? How about doubles?

[Michael Kosta]

I do know three. Yes. Yeah.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Why not two or one? You asked.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah. Why not two or one?

[Patrick McEnroe]

Talk to my brother about that.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, I, you know, you were 28 in the world in singles. You were three in the world in doubles. You, longest serving Davis cup captain for the United States. You're now the International Tennis hall of Fame president. How did you even get into tennis in the first place. You've done so much for the sport.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Well, we started in a town called Douglaston. Anybody from Queens here? Not many. Not many. So we started when we moved to this town called Douglaston, when my dad made partner in the law firm. My parents got married quite young. They lived in Flushing in a park. They kind of made it. And they moved to the kind of nicer part of Queens that had a tennis club. And the tennis club had a pool and tennis courts. And My brother was 8 or 9 at the time. And they said you could either try swimming or tennis. And he tried swimming. He hated it because he was playing other sports. We played soccer, basketball, baseball, all the sports. So he tried tennis. He went to the. Played at the local club. After a month into the summer, the local kid, who was like a college kid, went to my parents and said, you know, your son's really got a lot of talent for tennis. He's got great hand. Eye coordination. My parents are like, great. They never played tennis before in their life.

[Michael Kosta]

No.

[Patrick McEnroe]

He said, no, no. You need to do something about it.

[Michael Kosta]

Right?

[Patrick McEnroe]

So they took him to one of the first tennis academies was called the Port Washington Tennis Academy on Long Island. My parents called up there, got an invitation for a tryout to get a scholarship. John went there. There was a legendary Aussie coach there. You probably know him, Harry Hotman.

[Michael Kosta]

Okay.

[Carvana Salesperson]

Sure.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Coached a lot of the greats from Australia. Rod Laver, John Newcomb, Lou Hode. He saw John at the tryouts and he said, we'll take him. We're gonna give him a scholarship. He's gonna be number one in the world.

[Michael Kosta]

Holy shit. All right, now, first of all.

[Patrick McEnroe]

But the other part of that was that he said that to all the.

[Michael Kosta]

Parents that showed up. I was also gonna say he said that about John, but Patrick is sitting here.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Patrick, he saw me playing. He says, that guy's gonna be 28. I know it.

[Michael Kosta]

So then you want. So you saw.

[Patrick McEnroe]

So I followed in the footsteps. I was. I'm seven years younger than my brother. I have another brother named Mark in the middle. So we all.

[Michael Kosta]

Did Mark play, too?

[Patrick McEnroe]

Mark played, but not very competitive, I guess. Sort of like you.

[Michael Kosta]

Don't laugh at that. Don't laugh at that.

[Patrick McEnroe]

And he was a big time college player, seriously, fighting Illini. So we all played. We all just love tennis. We loved other sports, too, but it just so happened that we were a little bit better in tennis.

[Michael Kosta]

That's amazing. Let's talk briefly about the men's U.S. open final. You were calling the match Jannik Sinner from Italy lost to Carlos Alcaraz from Spain, who's now number one player in the world. It was a great showdown. They played in the French Open final, they played in the Wimbledon final. What did you see in the match that blew you away?

[Patrick McEnroe]

Well, these guys are incredible athletes. I sat there courtside, Michael, three years ago when they played for the first time ever in a major and they were both, you know, a little green. They hadn't won anything big yet. But I remember saying to the guys, Chris Fowler and John, my brother John, who were in the booth. I went courtside and I said, I've never seen two guys play at this type of speed and tempo. And this is coming off of Federer and Nadal and still Djokovic is still out there. But these guys were kind of raising the bar. So they play with amazing power. They play from defensive positions, they play more offense. And Alcaraz is like a showman. I mean, he just, he loves to be out there. You know, when he lost to two match points, when he was trying to close out the match, you feel the tension. And he smiled to the crowd.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah.

[Patrick McEnroe]

And he said. They asked him, we asked him about it afterwards. He said, I was actually afraid, but I just. But he smiled. He's like a silent. He's like a smiling assassin.

[Michael Kosta]

That's what I've been doing wrong this whole time. Exactly. When I feel afraid, I shiver and I cry. Yeah, exactly.

[Patrick McEnroe]

So these two guys are just really, you know, we had this era of the big three and we were all wondering what's going to happen to tennis, you know, because we're such global superstars, these players. And Serena Williams also retiring. And, you know, these two guys have literally just taken over. They've won the last eight majors combined between the two of them, 4 and 4. Sinner kept number one for the last year and a half. Now it's Alcarazo. The real question is, can anyone else threaten? Can anyone compete with them?

[Michael Kosta]

When in team sports, when a team loses in the super bowl, you know, they change things. We gotta get a new quarterback or the GM is moving things around. What can we do differently? And I'm curious what your thoughts are. Is Jannik Sinner needing to sit down and really re evaluate the whole game? I mean, he's two in the world. He won two Grand Slams. Is it that kind of approach with an individual sport like Dennis?

[Patrick McEnroe]

Well, first of all, interestingly, Alcaraz said after he won the tournament conference, he said he spent 15 days after Wimbledon when Sinner beat him for the first time, Sinner beat him in a final of a major. And the first time he won Wimbledon, he dethroned Alcaraz on the grass. So Alcaraz said he hadn't said this until he won the tournament, but then he divulged that he had spent 15 days just training to beat sinner. And Sinner afterwards, when he lost, said, you know, what he does is so good, he's so dominant. But against Alcaraz, maybe just not quite enough. So it's kind of fascinating to see how these two are pushing each. They're watching each other.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, they really are.

[Patrick McEnroe]

To see how one can get better. Alcarazza is a little bit more of an all around player. He's got a little more ability to come to the net, to play slice, to play drop shot. Sinner's more of a straight ahead, just pound, you, pound you into the ground. So he's trying to get a little bit of that finesse into his game, which he did at the Wimbledon final, by the way. Beat him in four sets. But Alcaraz got him back. And I was at our tennis academy today here in New York City that my brother and I run together, and all the kids are there. They were all so happy that Alcaraz, everybody's big Alcaraz fans, because you know why? His personality and the smile.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, he's not afraid to hit it between the legs. He's not afraid to go like this to the crowd. You know, it's funny you talk about that focused improvement, because a few shows ago, Ronnie and I did a sports war. I thought Ronnie kind of edged me out and I said, I will do anything I can to defeat him at today's sports war. And that's exactly what happened.

[Patrick McEnroe]

And he did.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, exactly. And the crow, I would say game.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Set, match to costume.

[Michael Kosta]

That's right. Thank you. The women's final. I thought this was almost the story of the whole tournament, that Amanda Anisimova, an American who lost in the Wimbledon final, 6, 060, whose family flew to London to watch her in the final, she didn't even win a game. I thought it was. As someone who's lost six' zero, six' zero a few times, not that much for her to then beat the player that beat her, Polish IGA Witek, make the final. I thought it was such an amazing story and that she took some time away from the sport because of the mental health challenges and difficulties. What's your take on Amanda Anisimova?

[Patrick McEnroe]

First of all, I'm not surprised that you know how it feels to lose six love.

[Michael Kosta]

Six love.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Michael. That's true. Secondly, that really is, in all seriousness, that really is the ultimate embarrassment for a tennis player at any level if that happens. So for it to happen on the biggest tournament, the biggest match of the.

[Michael Kosta]

Year, you're supposed to win when you serve, you can't even win one. Amanda.

[Patrick McEnroe]

So to your point, the fact that she, I thought she handled that with a lot of grace when it happened. She left the court for a couple minutes to kind of gather herself. She came back onto the on court ceremony, was really appreciative of how well she'd done. And I think she, she kind of faced it head on, which I think is what helped her this summer. But you're right, she had a great tournament. By the way, this was the fourth straight tournament in the majors that there was an American woman in the final.

[Michael Kosta]

That's right.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Madison Keys had won in Australia, Coco Gauff won in Paris. And then Amanda gets to two straight finals. So she's going to get over the hump. She's going to win one. But it was a great story. But Sabalenka has been the best player all year, even though she hadn't won a major, but she'd been in two other finals. So I think in some ways she deserved to win and kind of solidify her spot at number one, by the way. Sinner Alcaraz. There's still a competition through the rest of the year. Most people think that tennis is over after the US Open, but these players.

[Michael Kosta]

This crowd has stopped listening to tennis.

[Patrick McEnroe]

This crowd's like they're standing. What's that?

[Michael Kosta]

There's still more. You mean to play for the year end?

[Patrick McEnroe]

To play for the year end, yeah. To finish number one, which is a big deal for these guys. You know, you want to get that? I finished as the number one player in the world.

[Michael Kosta]

What are the differences between the mental health component nowadays versus when you played? Because I follow the sport closely and it just feels like there's never a break for these men and women. And you have to constantly defend the points. You have to constantly make new points. You have endorsements and deals. I mean, Naomi Osaka, every time I open up Instagram, she's endorsing something. And there's a lot of people are constantly needing to see them and for them to win. And that's, that's tough.

[Patrick McEnroe]

There's a lot of pressure in tennis to be in such an individual sport. You can't escape it, right so when you lose, I mean, as unsuccessful as you were, Michael, on the tour, even me at number 28 in the world, I tell this to parents all the time. I walked away from a tournament once in my life as a professional having not lost. I only won one singles tournament.

[Michael Kosta]

Right.

[Patrick McEnroe]

So. And even the.

[Michael Kosta]

What was that tournament?

[Patrick McEnroe]

That was in Sydney, Australia. Right. It was on hard courts right before the Australian Open.

[Michael Kosta]

Congrats on that.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Thank you, man.

[Michael Kosta]

Appreciate that. That's nice.

[Patrick McEnroe]

I mean, unbelievable. It's not sports wars, but it's something unbelievable.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah.

[Patrick McEnroe]

But the point is, is that you lose a lot in tennis, so you have to deal with it. The truth is that that's been going on forever. I actually am really glad that players like Naomi Osaka, like Amanda Anisimova, are talking about mental health and making. You know, it used to be if you talked about, hey, you're a wuss, you don't talk about the fact that you're struggling mentally. That shows that you're not tough or whatever that may be. So those things have always happened. But I think it's really healthy that the players are not shy about discussing it. And I think Amanda's a perfect example of someone that dealt with it, kind of confronted it head on, and then it made her, I think, a better person and a better player.

[Michael Kosta]

I mean, at one point, she was. Stepped away from the game. She was taking college classes, she was painting, you know, and it sounds almost funny, but when you are such an accomplished junior. She won the US Open juniors against Coco Gauff at age 13. Wow. You don't really ever have a moment to go. I need other interests and hobbies. I thought. I just thought that was an amazing story. Let's talk about the US Open for a second. I love the US Open. It's changed a lot over the years. The USTA is going to make $13 million just on the Honey Deuce beverage alone.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Yeah. The Honey Deuce is enough to pay for all the prize money for the players.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah, right.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Or at least the winner's prize money. Yeah.

[Michael Kosta]

I have never seen so many people who felt like, to me, they'd never watched tennis before. I watched Jannik Sinner, the world number one, waiting to serve and have to turn around. And there's a group of 45 guys doing selfies, standing up during the match.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Welcome to the world.

[Michael Kosta]

Is this good for tennis? I feel like it's more popular. U.S. open. I feel like it's making more money. Attendance is through the roof, good or bad.

[Patrick McEnroe]

I think overall it's good. But I catch your drift. I mean, I'm a tennis purist. I grew up going to Forest Hills and in the little club. So I. As a kid and as a fan, what I did was I got there the first couple days of the tournament, I just run around, go from court to court, match to match. And that's what the real. And there's still a place for that for real tennis fans. But definitely the US Open has become more about the show, the entertainment value. And the truth is, I mean, I go to. I'm a big New York Knicks fan. Right. So this past year they were good, but years before that, they sucked. Right. And they're still charging a fortune for tickets. And it's all about, you know, what you're going to eat, you know, what are you going to drink when you're sitting in those nice, you know, seats. But even the ones up top are super expensive. Same with the US Open. How do you think those people felt, by the way? I know, waiting in line as our president was getting seated in the stadium and, you know, no politics here for me.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah. But I will say, well, politics here for us. Yeah, exactly. Got that right. But, yeah, they bought.

[Patrick McEnroe]

The match started 45 minutes after it was supposed to start. Number one. Okay. Then. Then the players were playing, and it was 4, 3 in the first set. They'd been playing for half an hour.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah.

[Patrick McEnroe]

So it was an hour and a half after, and they were still thousands of people waiting to get in.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah. Well, I was very thankful that ESPN covered that.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Yes.

[Michael Kosta]

Because so often I'm afraid that the TV program doesn't want to paint a bad light on the event that they've paid millions of dollars to cover. So I was thankful that ESPN goes, look, this is happening and it sucks. And you guys were very honest about that. One of my favorite things that you've ever said was in 1991 when you made the Australian Open semifinal, your brother did not. And you said he didn't play. He didn't play.

[Patrick McEnroe]

That's because they kicked him out the year before. Correct.

[Michael Kosta]

Because he got defaulted. So he said, this tournament, I'll let my brother go play, but in the semifinals. You're in the semifinals. And you said to the reporters, just like you'd expect, Edberg, Lendl, McEnroe, Becker.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Correct.

[Michael Kosta]

He had a sense of humor even back then. All right, real quick, real quick. We haven't had an American men win the U.S. open since Andy Roddick, 2003. Taylor Fritz is getting close. Francis Tiavo, great player A lot of great American players.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Ben Shelton, I think maybe has the best chance.

[Michael Kosta]

Okay, Yeah, I was going to say, what's your thoughts on that? And it feels like the world got a lot better also.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Yes, the world got a lot better. I ran player development for the US Tennis association for a number of years, and we just tried to raise the bar on coaching, on training. I think we did that. You mentioned Amanda. I remember seeing Amanda when she was 10 years old, practicing, taking lessons. But I think we have a really good group of excellent players now getting to the finish line and winning a. You know, it's not like you're a football player, you're a basketball player. You know, you could be the third best player in the league, but you're on the best team you can win. In tennis, you could be the third. Taylor Fritz is a fourth or fifth best tennis player on the planet.

[Michael Kosta]

That's crazy.

[Patrick McEnroe]

But he's got Sinner and Alcaraz, and before that he had Djokovic, Nadal and Federer. So that's the challenge for the tennis player. These guys are amazing players. I think one of them will break through, but there's no doubt that right now it's Sinner. Alcaraz and the rest of the pack, including djokovic, who's at 38, was the third best player this year in the majors. But even he said after he lost in the US Open to Alcaraz, I can't beat these guys anymore.

[Michael Kosta]

It's crazy that a guy who made three semifinals in Grand Slam said it's not going to happen. I love the sport of tennis. If you can't tell, if this audience can't tell, I'm so thankful. All day I've been telling everybody on staff this is the most tennis this building has ever heard in its life. But I'm so thankful that we get.

[Patrick McEnroe]

To talk about it.

[Michael Kosta]

The sport. As I'm now 45 years old, I'm a parent, I've got my teammates that I played with at Illinois. I just feel like the sport has given me so much. It's taught me so many things. How to deal with success, how to deal with failure, how to deal with cheating.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Were you doing the cheating or.

[Michael Kosta]

I did some cheating. I did some cheating. In junior tennis, as you know, you make your own line calls. You're 12 years old, it's match point. The kid hits it on the line, it's out.

[Patrick McEnroe]

He's out.

[Michael Kosta]

Let's go. But it also happens to you. You've had a life in tennis. What are you most thankful for with the sport. What do you feel like the sport has given you?

[Patrick McEnroe]

I think it's given me resilience, you know, and a passion. I mean, I love it. You know, people. I went. I was just at our tennis academy today, right before I came here, talking to parents, talking to kids. One of the parents said, you must be so tired. You know, I said, I miss it. You know, like. Meaning the US Open is so crazy for us at espn, but I love it. I've been extremely blessed, I mean, lucky to be and wear different hats. So I've kind of never gotten bored because I've been involved in so many different aspects of it. But like you said, it teaches you many lessons about life, because most of the time you get your ass kicked, even when you're number 28 in the world and even 864 in the world, actually, then you always get your ass kicked.

[Michael Kosta]

Well, weirdly, at my ranking, I would be playing in tournaments with other 864s so I could win, grind out a win. But you're at 28 in the world. You're just getting your ass handed to, actually, by Ontario.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Yeah. I remember playing Andre Agassi. This will make you feel good. On center court at the French Open. He was just destroying me. He was just running. And then by the end of the third set, it was so bad that he wasn't even trying to finish the point. He was just making me run side to side. So I had a couple of my buddies, a couple of my college buddies were there watching in the crowd. I had no coach. I had my college buddies from my team at Stanford. And I looked up at him. After I finally. I won one point, I was so happy. I was like. I said, looked up at them. They're clapping for me. I said, I'm literally a human punching back. So you know what? It teaches you that. And the other thing about it is, you see when those players go out there, and whether it's 10 people watching, whether it's 24,000 people, like at the US Open, I mean, you really are out there by yourself. And even though you can coach now, coaching is legal now, which. Which is good and bad. I thought Chris Everett had a great line. To me during what we called the women's final, she said, it's almost too much. It's almost like the players. And so some of the players, I think it's a little too reliant. But for the most part, tennis really teaches you that independence that you need because to really be a great Coach and a great mentor. What you're trying to do, what we try to do with our kids at our academy is get them to be able to handle stuff on their own.

[Michael Kosta]

Yeah.

[Patrick McEnroe]

Isn't that what we try to do in life?

[Michael Kosta]

I mean, I remember playing college, losing terribly and you could coach on the changeovers. And my coaches, Craig and Bruce were like, hey, you really gotta stay low on your forehand when he's hitting it to your forehand. And I was like, do you wanna, do you wanna try against this guy? Yeah. Right. So even if you're saying it, it's hard to do it.

[Patrick McEnroe]

It's hard to do it.

[Michael Kosta]

Thank you so much for coming and chatting with us today. I love talking with you. Tune in to Holden court with Patrick McEnron on Sirius XM. Patrick McEnroe. We'll take a quick match. We'll be right back after this.

[Patrick McEnroe]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Patrick McEnroe]

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[Patrick McEnroe]

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[Patrick McEnroe]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Patrick McEnroe]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Michael Kosta]

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[Michael Kosta]

That's our show for tonight. Now here it is. The moment of zone. President says he did not sign it. So I take the President at his word. I don't think the oversight committee's going to invest in looking it up. Something 22 years ago we're going to look. So you're just going to take the President's word that he this is not it. What is it? What does it have to do with with anything? Explore more shows from the Daily show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch the Daily show weeknights at 1110 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount. Plus, this has been a Comedy Central podcast.

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