Gay Son and Thot Daughter with E.R. Fightmaster

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Gay Son and Thot Daughter with E.R. Fightmaster"

Released on April 16, 2025, "The Dylan Hour" hosted by Dylan Mulvaney, features a candid and humorous conversation with E.R. Fightmaster, Dylan's father. This episode delves into themes of gender expression, familial relationships, personal growth, and quirky life anecdotes.

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1. Opening Banter and Gender Expression

The episode kicks off with playful interactions between Dylan and E.R. Fightmaster, setting a lighthearted tone. Dylan sports a cowboy outfit, sparking curiosity about the attire choice.

• Dylan Mulvaney (00:47): "I feel nothing."

• Fightmaster (01:35): "We're gonna get Fight. The Next Best Thing, and that is Glenlivet."

Discussion Points:

• Gender Expression: Fightmaster introduces himself wearing a cowboy outfit as a nod to "gender fuckery," aiming to blend masculine and feminine aesthetics. This setup leads to humorous exchanges about their appearances and gender identities.

• Costuming Challenges: Dylan shares her discomfort with women's suits due to her height and body shape, highlighting the challenges of aligning wardrobe with personal identity.

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2. Familial Dynamics and Personal Journeys

A significant portion of the conversation explores the father-daughter relationship, touching upon mutual support in their respective gender expressions.

• Dylan Mulvaney (05:21): "I don't want you to learn it. You're too good at being femme."

• Fightmaster (05:28): "Well, it's crazy because you are my dad. And so biologically, famously, most dads are a little disappointed when their sons don't deliver."

Discussion Points:

• Support and Understanding: Despite traditional expectations, Fightmaster expresses pride in Dylan's embrace of her femininity, defying conventional paternal disappointment.

• Navigating Gender Identity: They discuss the online toxicity surrounding gender identities, with Dylan advocating for the acceptance of being a "gay son or thot daughter."

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3. Personal Anecdotes and Quirky Stories

The conversation veers into amusing and peculiar stories that shed light on their personalities and experiences.

• Fightmaster's Plastic Rat Tale (22:34 - 25:00): Fightmaster recounts an eerie incident involving a plastic rat gifted by a massage therapist during college. The rat's persistent squeaking and eventual appearance atop his dresser lead to a humorous yet spooky narrative about disposing of the rat by throwing it into the Ohio River.

  • Fightmaster (24:51): "I drive down there. 2am, throw it over. Haven't seen the rat since."

• Dylan's Birding Addiction (10:17): Dylan shares her newfound passion for birding, humorously expressing her enthusiasm despite not having prior interest.

  • Dylan Mulvaney (10:17): "My sweet of the week is that I've recently gotten addicted to birding."

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4. Life in Cincinnati vs. Los Angeles

Dylan and Fightmaster compare their upbringing in Cincinnati with their current lives in Los Angeles, highlighting cultural shifts and personal growth.

• Dylan Mulvaney (18:23): "I think Cincinnati has made some serious changes since I was growing up there. I think it's for the better."

• Fightmaster (28:51): "People move in generations. So you go out to Chicago and you learn how to be funny and thoughtful and smart. Or you assault somebody and you get in trouble and you have to move back home."

Discussion Points:

• Cultural Differences: They discuss the transformation of Cincinnati into a more inclusive and friendly city compared to their Midwestern upbringing, touching upon experiences of acceptance and community.

• Career Paths: Fightmaster humorously outlines the "pipeline" for moving to major cities like LA or New York, emphasizing the better opportunities available without causing trouble.

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5. Creative Ventures and Aspirations

The duo explores their creative pursuits, including music, acting, and craftsmanship.

• Dylan's Musical Journey (33:55): Dylan discusses her transition from comedy and acting to focusing on music, releasing 12 songs over the past year.

  • Dylan Mulvaney (33:55): "I think that for artists that enjoy multiple forms of expression, I was really lucky to have done comedy for about 10 years. So I just was kind of dedicated myself to throwing my whole self into it for the last year."

• Woodworking and Crafting (34:27): Dylan shares her venture into woodworking, having recently built a birdhouse.

  • Dylan Mulvaney (34:27): "I made a birdhouse last night. I'm waiting for the stain to dry."

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6. Rapid-Fire Questions and Personal Insights

In the "Lightning Round" segment, Dylan answers a set of rapid-fire questions, revealing her preferences and personal quirks.

• Favorite Horror Movie (48:25): "The one in the cave."

• Favorite Song Lyric (48:46): "Your man's twiddling short thumbs and he's picking fights."

Notable Interactions:

• Handling Misgendering (51:18): Dylan discusses strategies for addressing incorrect pronoun usage, advocating for approaches that help others save face and foster long-term respect.

  • Dylan Mulvaney (51:19): "I think that's tricky. I sometimes employ other people to do it for me because I think that that helps the person save face."

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7. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

The episode wraps up with reflections on mutual growth, support, and the importance of embracing one's identity.

• Fightmaster (53:29): "Everyone. It has been an absolute pleasure to have my dad, er, fightmaster on the Dylan Hour."

• Dylan Mulvaney (53:37): "Thank you for having me. I love you."

Final Reflections:

• Embracing Identity: Both Dylan and Fightmaster emphasize the significance of accepting and celebrating one's gender identity, advocating for a supportive and inclusive environment.

• Future Aspirations: They hint at future projects and continued explorations of their identities and creative endeavors.

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Key Takeaways

• Supportive Familial Relationships: The episode highlights a unique and supportive father-daughter relationship that defies traditional gender expectations.

• Humor and Honesty: Dylan and Fightmaster blend humor with honest discussions about gender identity, personal growth, and navigating societal norms.

• Embracing Multifaceted Identities: Both hosts showcase the importance of embracing diverse interests and identities, whether through fashion, crafting, or creative expression.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Dylan on Birding Addiction (10:17): "My sweet of the week is that I've recently gotten addicted to birding."

• Fightmaster on Gender Expression (01:35): "All you soccer moms, all your they's and fems, all your bottom boys, my bisexual femmes, come one and all disassociate with me."

• Dylan on Handling Misgendering (51:19): "I sometimes employ other people to do it for me because I think that that helps the person save face."

• Fightmaster's Plastic Rat Story (24:52): "I drive down there. 2am, throw it over. Haven't seen the rat since."

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Conclusion

This episode of "The Dylan Hour" offers a heartfelt and entertaining exploration of gender identity, familial bonds, and personal quirks. Through candid conversations and shared experiences, Dylan Mulvaney and E.R. Fightmaster provide listeners with humor, insights, and a deeper understanding of navigating life's complexities with authenticity and love.

Transcript

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Hey there.

[Fightmaster]

We hope you enjoy the Dylan Hour. If you love the show, there's an easy way to support it. After you listen, take a quick moment to leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. It really helps more awesome listeners like you discover the show. Thanks for your support and enjoy the episode.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Hi, everyone, I'm David Duchovny. Join me on my podcast, Fail Better, where we use failure as a lens to reflect on the past and analyze the current moment. I. I speak with makers and performers like Rob Lowe, Rosie O'Donnell and Kenya Barris, as well as thinkers like Kara Swisher and Nate Silver, to understand how both personal setbacks and larger forces impact our world. Listen to Fail Better wherever you get your podcasts.

[Fightmaster]

Lemonad. In your car, in the shower, on a walk through the Dylan Hour. Feeling sweet, feeling sour.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I feel nothing.

[Fightmaster]

The Dylan Hour.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My couch is open.

[Fightmaster]

It's better than therapy. All you soccer moms, all your they's and fems, all your bottom boys, My bisexual femmes, come one and all disassociate with me. It's free, grab a drink or two or three. You have no friends. All good. You got me. It's the hour.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Love you. Howdy, y'all.

[Fightmaster]

Welcome back to the Dylan Hour. Now, you at home might be wondering, Dylan, why are you wearing a cowboy outfit? And I'm asking myself that same thing now. It's because I was on FaceTime with my guest for today and we were talking yesterday and I was looking at them and I thought, now that's just the most masculine person I've ever seen in my whole life. And I thought, how could I really change it up here at the Dylan Hour and do a little gender fuckery? And this person's helped me very specifically with my gender fuckery. So I thought, let's give a little. Let's give a little mask for mask today with a dear friend of mine, an actor, a comedian, an incredible cowboy, a singer, a songwriter, they do it all. It is my dear friend, er, fightmaster. Welcome.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

The butcher's thing about you right now is the pink eyeshadow.

[Fightmaster]

And you know what? We did do two episodes today. And so I had something a little bit more femme before.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Okay.

[Fightmaster]

Did you think that, like, I just specifically, like, I was like, I was wearing this outfit. I was like, it just needs a little.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, I. That's 100% what I thought.

[Fightmaster]

But it is like. It's like soft butch.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I. There's no lashes. I love. I love that you think that soft butch is like Vaseline and what is this?

[Fightmaster]

Cowgirl?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You're a fem, sweetie.

[Fightmaster]

Okay, we'll take it. We'll take it, we'll take it. Fight Master. Do you like ER or fight?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, I. I fight for you. We're family.

[Fightmaster]

I thought so. Was this the first time you've worn cowboy clothes like this?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No. And, I mean, you texted me, or we were on FaceTime, and you were like, I'm gonna wear a cowboy outfit. I was like, well, I'll have to pick some options, because that's a lot of my wardrobe.

[Fightmaster]

You do. You. You commit to the bit every time.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Thank you.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, damn. I forgot to take out my second piercing. It's giving me away. Damn.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, that's the thing, Fi.

[Fightmaster]

I haven't seen you in so long. We have so much to catch up over, and I think first we have to introduce. We have a very special drink for you today. And. And the title of that drink is. It's called the Next Best Thing, because Fightmaster here famously asked for Glen Fiddich Scotch whiskey, which this morning I went to buy on Uber Eats, and it was $300. And you know what I said? I said, we're gonna get Fight. The Next best Thing, and that is Glenlivet. And it's still. That was still pretty expensive, Dylan.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Was it like, a bottle of, like, 300?

[Fightmaster]

It was the good stuff because.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No, no, no, no.

[Fightmaster]

That's how much I care about you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It's $47.

[Fightmaster]

Okay, well, we got the $47 one, and it's called the Next Best Thing. Now, here's something. I don't drink dark liquor, so we're gonna see how long this lasts. And if we switch to a pbr, we switch to a pbr.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I won't judge.

[Fightmaster]

Okay. Cheers.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Cheers.

[Fightmaster]

Notice they put us on two separate couches because the sexual tension is just too strong.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

They knew what would happen.

[Fightmaster]

They knew. How was that?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

God, that's f. Oh. First alcohol of the day, which you probably shouldn't say. Oh.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, no, we'll let the ice.

[Fightmaster]

I love it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Let the ice smell.

[Fightmaster]

I love that. I love that liquor. Whiskey.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You.

[Fightmaster]

It's my favorite drink.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You are one of my most favorite people on Earth, because the thing that you know how to do least is masculinity.

[Fightmaster]

I am famously very bad at it. I actually, I've built a large brand off of such a thing, but I think if there was anyone to learn it from, it would be you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I don't want you to learn it. You're Too good at being femme. I think if you tried to teach me femininity, it would bounce off in the same way that masculinity bounces off.

[Fightmaster]

Well, it's crazy because you are my dad. And so biologically, famously, most dads are a little disappointed when their sons don't deliver. But now, being your daughter.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

It's actually good that you want me in dresses.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I do. Well, I think it's that really toxic thing that I see a lot online now, which is like, do you want a gay son or a thought daughter? And all the men are like, thought daughter. And I'm. I don't know a lot about being.

[Fightmaster]

A pervert, but today, I am your gay son.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You're my thought daughter.

[Fightmaster]

I'm your thought. I'm your thought.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You're my thought daughter.

[Fightmaster]

I will say, like, if I specifically wore the shirt open for our next segment, which is bitter and sweet, which. This is the most bitter drink I've ever tasted in my entire life.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, I told your team that. I also was like, maybe we'll do a dirty martini, and then I'll make Dylan eat an oyster. So I think I have a little, like.

[Fightmaster]

I would have slurped it down happily. Next time. Next. Next time. Someone's got to go also. I did. I lasted about 30 seconds as the masculine person that I wanted to be for you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

If that. That's the amount of time that it takes me to keep and hold a good, like, feminine archetype. Use it going like this.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, now that you've spinning it, that'd be a little bit more water. I was gonna cut. Cut the taste.

[Fightmaster]

I'm done. I tried. I tried so hard for you. But what I was getting to is our next segment. It's our first segment here at the Dylan Hour called Bitter and Sweet. Beautiful. That's bitter as fuck. We're talking rose and thorn of our weeks here. What are you feeling bitter about? And what are you feeling sweet about this week?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, shit, that's hard. You go first.

[Fightmaster]

Okay, I'll go first. I'm a little nervous that maybe I've talked about this before, because it's a real ongoing theme on my body. My armpit hair is growing in a crazy way again. And after getting so much laser hair removal, you wouldn't believe, like, the amount of money I've given these people.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

How's it growing?

[Fightmaster]

Thick. Thicker than it was before. And maybe that's good for today, actually, but for the other episodes, not so much.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. And you're pissed about this. This is not your rose.

[Fightmaster]

I mean, well, in theory, like, because I'm like, in my soft, butch era, I'm kind of like, maybe we like that. But I also am pissed because that means the money that I've spent is not going to the just.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Cause you know what? I'll join you there. As a thorn, I was looking down at my leg hair while doing hot yoga the other day, and I have on my shins a forest and on my thighs, not a peach fuzz.

[Fightmaster]

Where did it go?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I don't. I think it's because I shaved my calves as a. Like, as a kid when I thought I was, like, being a girl, but I didn't shave the thighs because I was like, no one's gonna see that. And now it's just like, a beautiful, like, tall woman's leg up top and then like, a hot male tennis player at the bottom.

[Fightmaster]

What if you started shaving the peach.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Fuzz at the top?

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. Maybe that's what we do today. Get a razor.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Maybe that's what we do today.

[Fightmaster]

The one day I didn't bring a razor to get my 5 o'clock shadow on air. Okay, and then let's talk our. Well, actually, what we needed to get to was the suite, which is why I kept my top open. My boobs since I've seen you have grown exponentially.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

They look incredible.

[Fightmaster]

You've said nothing in the past 45 seconds.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, once again, you're my daughter.

[Fightmaster]

That's fair.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I have. There. There are limits to what I'm supposed.

[Fightmaster]

To say, but as your daughter, I'm telling you that you needed it, that this happened.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Sweetie, I love I last saw you. They're turning into full tiddies.

[Fightmaster]

I know. And TikTok might even be blurring. Like, this could be a censored image at this point.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That would be huge.

[Fightmaster]

I know. And it's. There's something so, like, I got past that point where now I'm like, oh, I could be in mask clothes, but my tits look so good that you still aren't worried.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I like that you're full nip out. Because I've got such actually, like, deceptively beautiful bazongas that, like, I could not be in a tank top.

[Fightmaster]

Drafting. Yeah, like, you are the guest, so if that's what you want.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I know. Everyone would start treating me differently. I would get, like, a lot of favors done. People would walk me out to my car.

[Fightmaster]

That's right. And, like, we would start probably getting a lot of things, which you Know us being our drink is the next best thing. I think in a lot of ways, we're the next best thing. If Adam Driver isn't available. Fightmaster, please. You call Dakota Fanning. She can't get a hold of her, you call me. That is the theme.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That was a good one for you.

[Fightmaster]

What's that?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That was a good one for you.

[Fightmaster]

Dakota Fanning.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Thank you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I could really see that.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. I think about her playing me in like. Like, a beer gate sort of, like, movie, because obviously they wouldn't hire a trans person to hire.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I think she. She has played a trans person before.

[Fightmaster]

Has she?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Call her up, bitches. What's your sweet of the week?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My sweet of the week is that I've recently gotten addicted to birding. I know that. I know. I'm, like. Literally, I'm, like, learning bird calls and, like, looking for birds. I know.

[Fightmaster]

That is a very dad thing to do.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I know, sweetie. I bought. I bought binoculars. Like, really down the rabbit hole.

[Fightmaster]

Can you give us a few? Like, what. What are some.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, see, I would rather die than do that publicly. I am in my apartment being like.

[Fightmaster]

Okay, okay.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So gorgeous. Stone pigeon.

[Fightmaster]

The. The teacher.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That was a great pigeon. Yep. That's a raven. Yeah. Or American crow. That's a chicken. That last one was a chicken. That's incredible.

[Fightmaster]

You got nothing for us?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Mm m. No, because I'm trying to, like, right now, I'm, like, trying to figure out the difference between, like, a wren and a titmouse. But the good news was that if.

[Fightmaster]

The titmouse is right here, you could be the ren.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Hey, that's a tit rat. Those things are huge.

[Fightmaster]

So, dad, if you're my daddy, who's your daddy?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Shane from the L Word.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, I've never seen it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, that's fine.

[Fightmaster]

Do you want to watch together?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No, it's cool. Yeah. I don't think it's important for you to have seen the new one or the old one. The old one. Well, the old one, because I think the old one is fun for people that are very, very queer, because there's still something 90s offensive about it where they say, shit, but you just absolutely can't anymore.

[Fightmaster]

T slur.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Probably, maybe, but more like that, like, bisexual men don't exist. Like, it's just stuff that, like, right now, like, the new L Word did such a good job, like, being so inclusive, and the old L Word was, like, fully, like, a hate crime, but, like, in tandem.

[Fightmaster]

So good.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, yes, yes. Okay, so who's Shane Shane is, I think, still, I think, uses she her pronouns. But Shane is probably a lot. Most people's gateway drugs. Gateway drug into the queer world.

[Fightmaster]

And that was the craziest pivot I've ever seen on the Dylan Hour because I'm sitting next to my gateway to transdom. Well, well, well, well. And sip to that, honey. And on that note, we're entering sip and spill territory here at the Dylan Hour, where. And we got a lot of things to spill. And I'm gonna now open my beer because I'm. I'm not fucking with that ever again.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'll join you in the beer town. This is. This is going to absolutely fuck up.

[Fightmaster]

Well, for $48, you're going to love it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'm about to call my partner and start a fight.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah, let's do it. So you were my gateway. You're my first non binary person I ever met. I pretty sure, unless that something else popped up. But we were doing a show at UCB in la. I was doing the Book of Mormon and we had like a one night sort of UCB comedians versus Mormon cast members.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. Improvisers. And. And beautiful Broadway singers came together to sing improvised music together.

[Fightmaster]

Do you remember that?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I do. We sang a song about possums.

[Fightmaster]

And that is also a large theme of this podcast is how many times can I mention a possum? I. I had never done anything like that before. I was really nervous and scared. And you kind of ended up being my. My partner. We were doing musical comedy and so somebody was like, started playing piano. And then I was like, I have a pet possum. And then you were like, probably.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I think that's awesome. Yes.

[Fightmaster]

And it was this crazy moment of not only who is this, like, super tall person in a turtleneck that, like, makes me think all these things about myself and is making me question my life, but also I'd like to know them forever.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Hmm. I remember that because I remember we went out to dinner that night and I remember not quite being able to put my finger on you because something was not. Something did not feel right. And it was. I didn't think you were a bad person. I was just like, what is. There's something missing here. And then later on, you we. You came over to my house, I think in like 2020.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. With barrettes in my hair.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes. Oh, and that. Yeah. Oh, my God. And that beautiful sweater.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, with the chunky knit.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Out there. You know, the chunky knit.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

You showed up at that campfire, it was like Me, Caleb, her and you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes. And everything made sense.

[Fightmaster]

Everything made sense. But I'm telling you, I. I remember meeting you, I was like, there's something about you. And then I. I found out you were non binary. And then I was like, what is this? And that's when we literally went into lockdown, I think like a week later. And so I really sat with that for a long time. And then you were the first person I moved up to la. Cause I said that's the only place non binary people can live, apparently. Because that's fightmasters in la still. True. And it's been crazy ever since.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I know. I've loved it. I've loved being a part of your journey. I've felt really touched along the way. And you know, obviously the world knows this about you, but you are so good at articulating your journey that it's. I think it's helpful even to people that have been in the game a little bit longer to see the way that you're articulating it. Because a lot of us were driving blonde.

[Fightmaster]

But I don't think you're. I think that I actually. What? One of my favorite parts about you is that we can joke about these, like, really tricky, sensitive topics in a way that might be potentially problematic even in this moment, but is really like, I, I don't. If you can't find the funny in it, I don't know, like, how to find a way in to like, even gender as a whole. And I think a lot of the videos I was making, I was like, how can I find silliness in something that is so scary to so many people? And you made me feel like I could be silly. And you also made me feel like it was actually like a really, like, okay thing to do.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, man, you were so fun. Right around that period, I remember everything was changing for you and you were doing. You were starting to do tiktoks about the possums that you currently had in your studio apartment.

[Fightmaster]

And that's tea.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

And I went over there.

[Fightmaster]

You saw the. You met the possums. You're one of the few, actually.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I met them in that studio apartment. I met them.

[Fightmaster]

There's pictures.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. And that I. I was the. I say it speaks to who you are that I didn't think you'd lost it.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, that. It was.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, I came over there. There's. My friend has a apartment full of possums. And I was not like, oh my God, she's nuts.

[Fightmaster]

You're so happy for me.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

Because it was also. That was also a gateway, I think, into my transness was raising possums. Because it does. It takes a specific kind of person.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, don't. Let's cut that.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. How about if you were gonna raise some kind of crazy animal in your house, what would it be?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, man. Jesus. I don't know. I. Animals. The only animal I really want in my house is a cat. They're so clean and lovely. I love cats. I don't want anyone else in there. I don't even want human beings in there.

[Fightmaster]

Like. No dolphins. No.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, I don't. I don't think I should be one on one with the dolphin. I think I might try stuff. I've always thought dolphins are hot. No one's. I mean, you're not supposed to say that, but like, please. How. How many times have we heard about that?

[Fightmaster]

Stop. This is getting crazy.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

When anybody's in the water with the dolphin too long, what happens?

[Fightmaster]

Well, we have some other things in common other than just our transfers, which is the Midwest pipeline. Yours started earlier than mine, but you grew up in Cincinnati, Ohio, and I went to college in Cincinnati, Ohio. And we went to the same college, right?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes. Yeah, you went, but you went to ccm. I went to the all Star.

[Fightmaster]

Hey, now. Yeah, that was. It was probably a very different experience for both of us, right?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

But what's your like overall take on Cincinnati?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I think Cincinnati has made some serious changes since I was growing up there. I think it's for the better. I think it's made. It's a much more friendly city. I don't think when I really Midwestern experience, it wasn't like people were outright. There was a lot of outright hatred, but there was a lot of outright. Everybody's white. Everybody looks the exact same. You know, I didn't know what a gay person was for a very long time because it was just not talked about.

[Fightmaster]

And now you do?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

What? Yeah, and now I really do. Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Okay. And have you been back to Cincinnati recent?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, I have and it's gorgeous. And I'm happy for everyone there. I can't believe it. I'm jealous.

[Fightmaster]

And the rent is so inexpensive. It makes me so sad. I had the most beautiful apartment. I think was 400amonth.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It's so up.

[Fightmaster]

It's really sad to think about because I wish we maybe would. Is this us moving to Cincinnati in our cowboy outfits? I'm detransitioning to move to Cincinnati.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

We could do Northern Kentucky dress like this. Oh, it's a stone story.

[Fightmaster]

You ever gone to the. The ghost bar in the Bobby Mackie's?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No. What is that one?

[Fightmaster]

Northern Kentucky, honey. So right over the river, there is one of the most haunted bars in America. My mom, she. That was the first stop when I went to college. She said, we're going to Bobby Mackie's. The people who know, they know there's a whole. So you can get absolutely blackout and then go on a ghost tour under the bar in the. Like, there's a. There's a Satan's hole to hell in the basement of the bar.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's really nice.

[Fightmaster]

So next.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It's nice that they did that for Christmas.

[Fightmaster]

So next Christmas break, Fightmaster, I'll be doing that. When you're visiting the fam, that's what you're gonna do.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I've gone underneath of the buildings and over the Rhine to see the spooky as well. Yeah, but cool. I mean, all that prohibition era, like, the big cast.

[Fightmaster]

Such a vibe.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

But you did go to UC at one point. University of Cincinnati.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Because my mom is a professor there. And so I got two years free while I figured out what I wanted to do with my life.

[Fightmaster]

Could you imagine if I had your mom as, like, a professor? Literally, not because I was there 2015-2019?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You might have had her if you took psych.

[Fightmaster]

I needed it. No, we took a lot. Well, for math, we had to take music theory. So instead, like, they would, like. Basically, instead of, like, doing your real classes, they would make up a musical theater class that kind of was, like, adjacent to that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's so nice.

[Fightmaster]

It's amazing.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I had to take statistics. That shit sucks.

[Fightmaster]

PE was dance.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I wish that I could explain to more children that math is not real.

[Fightmaster]

This is the. This is the place for it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You don't have to learn math. Okay. You don't have to know that shit.

[Fightmaster]

That's coming from a cowboy.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, stop.

[Fightmaster]

A working cowboy.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

When Adam Driver isn't available, which sucks.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Like, because he always is.

[Fightmaster]

Right? And then where did. How did Cincinnati to then being a famous actor cowboy in LA happen?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, I went to Chicago to learn improv.

[Fightmaster]

Midwestern people. My favorite people I've met in. Yes, thank you, Katherine. One of our producers. Famously, Midwestern Chicago. I am so addicted to the Midwestern culture of people that come to LA because they're the best ones here, 100%. And then I end up in Eagle Rock, you know, drinking some beers and laughing with really sweet comedy people. And from Chicago, the Midwesterners that moved.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

To Chicago to Learn how to be funny and then moved anywhere else, are the best people in that place routinely. Because as Midwesterners, we grew up truly in such boring ways that we have the ability to kind of appreciate where we are all the time. There's nothing blase about us at all. You talk to these, like, Los Angeles kids, and they're like, I don't like the ocean because the sand hurts my feet. And I'm like, that's incredible. If. If you would have told me that I could go to swim in the Ohio river, even knowing it was polluted, I would have been there. You know, I would have been drinking that shit.

[Fightmaster]

Right?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Like the Midwesterners. We just don't care.

[Fightmaster]

I threw a rat into the Ohio River.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Alive or dead?

[Fightmaster]

It was a plastic rat, but it would not stop squeaking. Can I tell you?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well, yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Have I not told this one? Oh, bitch. So I think my ponytail just broke.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Mask for mask.

[Fightmaster]

They knew. It's literally, I'm like. I'm, like, coming alive right now. Just, like, grow fake eyelashes out of my eyes right now. So in college, my dad came to visit, and we love getting massages, and we couldn't find anywhere on a Saturday afternoon to go get a massage, and so we had to drive really far out of Cincinnati to the strip mall. And it was really scary, like, this. This sort of massage place that we were in. And this woman, while she was massaging me, was like, are you voting for Trump? And this was like, 2016, I think, or something. And I was like, no. And she hit me, and she was, like, bad. And. And then she was like, do you have a girlfriend?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

And I was like, to you?

[Fightmaster]

To me? And I went, not yet.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Not yet, ma'am, but I cannot wait.

[Fightmaster]

She goes. She goes, you need girlfriend? And I was like, oh, no. And then she goes, I have a gift for you. And she gave me a plastic rat. And why I accepted it, we don't know. I'm. That's what.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Because you'd already been traumatized.

[Fightmaster]

Well. And I. I was like, what? Okay, whatever you want. And so I take this plastic rat home, and it wouldn't stop squeaking. And for some reason, I didn't get rid of it. I put it in the bottom of my drawer, and I, like, put clothes over it. And then one night, and I forgot about months go by, then I come home from rehearsal one night. It's sitting on the top of my dresser. No, it's sitting on the top of my dresser. Yep. Thank you, Megan. Sitting on top of my dresser. And I'm. And then I. So first, before I freaked out, I called my roommate. She's not home. I'm like, bryn, did you move the rat? She didn't even know the rat existed. She was like, what do you mean there's a rat in our house? I'm like, no, girl, I'll call you later. So then I text the only witch that I knew, Andy Mientus. Broadway's Andy Mientis. And I said, can you help me get rid of this? And he said, you need to go. I went to Kroger. That's what they call it. Correct. And we don't have it in la. And I bought a lot of Epsom salts. I bought sage, all this stuff. And. But he said that I needed to throw it over my right shoulder into a body of water. And I'm looking around in Ohio thinking, where's it going to be?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Ohio River.

[Fightmaster]

I drive down there. 2am, throw it over. Haven't seen the rat since.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Haven't seen the rat since is such a funny way to tell that story.

[Fightmaster]

And I'm just saying that you said what you said. Yeah, that's what I'm putting out there.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That woman put a hex on you.

[Fightmaster]

Have you ever been hexed?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I mean, certainly. I think that's the leg hair situation.

[Fightmaster]

That's. And that feels correct.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

But you did eventually find your way out of the Ohio river to Los Angeles.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, I did.

[Fightmaster]

Through Chicago.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, I think Chicago people are there.

[Fightmaster]

Does the river go all the way up there?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You think I go down? It goes down.

[Fightmaster]

No math, but geography.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, good. Geography, good. Gotta know where to go. Math. What am I using that for?

[Fightmaster]

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp, and therapy can feel like a big investment, but the state of your mind is just as important as your physical health. Now let's talk numbers. Traditional in person therapy can cost anywhere from 100 to $250 per session, which adds up fast. But with BetterHelp online therapy, you can save on average up to 50% per session. And with BetterHelp, you pay a flat fee for weekly sessions, saving you big on cost and on time. Therapy should feel accessible, not like a luxury. With online therapy, you get quality care at a price that makes sense and can help you with anything from anxiety to everyday stress. Your mental health is worth it, and now it's within reach. I have always been a queen of therapy. I even asked my parents if I could start therapy when I was just a little kid. And it's still one of my favorite hours of the week, but I know that it's not as easy for everyone to jump into, so I feel like BetterHelp really is an awesome option. With over 30, 000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 5 million people globally. It's convenient too. You just join a session with the click of a button, helping you fit therapy into your busy life. Plus, you can switch therapists at any time at no extra cost. Your well being is worth it, so visit betterhelp.comdylanhour to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp h lp.comdylanhour Love ya honey. I am about to be jet setting all over this spring. We're talking London, Paris, you name it. And I can't be showing up to these luxe destinations with any old old luggage and tired looks. That's why I'm upgrading with Quince's high quality travel essentials at fair prices like lightweight European linen styles from $30, washable silk tops and comfy lounge sets. Plus Quince has the premium luggage options and stylish tote bags I need to carry it all. The best part? All Quince Items are priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. By partnering directly with top factories, Quince cuts out the cost of the middleman and passes the savings on to us. I am a strong believer that the foundation of any wardrobe should be a set of good basics and Quince has us covered in more ways than one. I found the cutest cardigan on there and I'm especially excited by their bikinis, which are not just dental floss for those of us that want a little extra coverage. I'm also obsessed with their Jackie sunglasses which are totally giving retro Jackie O vibes. For your next trip, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from quints. Go to quince.comdylanhour for 365 day returns plus free shipping on your order. That's Q U I n c e.com dylanhour to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com Dylan Hour it's the D.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So.

[Fightmaster]

Tell us about this, this exodus from Chicago to la.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Well people go and Megan can tell you about this too. People move in generations. So you go out to Chicago and you learn how to be funny and thoughtful and smart. Or you assault somebody and you get in trouble and you have to move back home. And there's only two pipelines and if you choose the one pipeline where you haven't hurt anybody. You get to move to LA or New York.

[Fightmaster]

Congratulations.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes. Yeah. And a lot of the abusers go back home to Milwaukee or Dallas or.

[Fightmaster]

But you got to go to la.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, I did.

[Fightmaster]

That's why we get you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, I escaped without hurting anyone.

[Fightmaster]

How many years ago?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I got here in 2018.

[Fightmaster]

And what's been the takeaway since?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I love it here. It's a retirement community.

[Fightmaster]

Obsessed.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

I'm telling everybody that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No, it's. It's fantastic. If you like your job in the arts and you work like, you know, as many months out of the year as they'll let you. If Adam Driver's busy, then you get to come back here. And no one is employed. No one has a job. And so you're. It's a shame. Free environment because no one's ever worked before here. And the money is just coming from. You don't know where for anyone. No one has a paycheck. There's nothing traceable. And then everyone has a beautiful apartment. You don't know how or why. You know that they worked once at least a couple years ago. They were on that one show. And then. And it's beautiful. I don't know. I love it. I think that's good.

[Fightmaster]

So. So let's talk about your name. Fightmaster. Should we fight?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No, I. I would let you win and arm wrestle. People don't want to hear this.

[Fightmaster]

1, 2, 3, 4.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

There's more. 5, 6, 7, 8. No. Wow. I will never, ever beat a lady.

[Fightmaster]

That was amazing.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I. I got my partner by pretending to lose at an arm wrestling game. That's. That's how I got them.

[Fightmaster]

That's how you got them?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. Where I was like, ah, so strong. Oh, my God.

[Fightmaster]

So that's your move? Yeah, I. So I should try it the opposite way? Maybe next time. I don't. Oh, no, I did it right.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

If I were doing this with a grown man, I would have. You would have seen me go to. One of our arms broke.

[Fightmaster]

Okay.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

But you're a beautiful lady and my daughter, and there's just no world in which I'm gonna physically dominate you.

[Fightmaster]

How do you. Would you ever wear a dress right now?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It would depend. It would depend on if it was like, for a camo. Yeah, it was camo. Or quilted. Yeah. If I'm at home. No. I feel so truly bizarre in feminine clothing. I have a really honest expression, like, understanding of stuff, which is like, really more grounded in masculinity. So even when I'm. Yeah. When A T shirt is too small. I get ruffled in a weird way. You know what I mean? It's like if you have sound sensitivity and you're hearing bombs, that's what it feels like when femininity is, like, placed on me.

[Fightmaster]

Did that ever happen? Like, did you ever have that in costuming and things when you've been given things?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, my God. Well, there's so women's suiting, and men's suiting is different. And so I'm 6:1, and if you put me in a woman's suit, it, like, cinches my waist and then bows out at the hips and then comes up to, like, as a right around my knee in the pants. And it's such a miserable look. And everyone's. Everyone's expecting you to feel happy because they found you a suit, but they found you a woman's suit. And women's suits are supposed to offset the masculinity by hugging curves and all this shit. So, yes, I've definitely had that experience. I'm lucky to have worked with a lot of costumers, though, that go out of their way to make sure I feel comfortable if the first look is not the right thing.

[Fightmaster]

Right. And now it's like learning how to dress our bodies in what we need on the day.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

How did you feel in that suit?

[Fightmaster]

I felt so hot. Yeah. That was a woman's suit, though. It was like. It was a vintage suit. And I think I really want to get a tux that I start wearing to, like, everything, because that's what a lot of these men in this town do. And I just. I get so jealous. It's ridiculous that you're expected to find a new ball gown.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You have to do it. You're so good at it. We don't want to see men doing a bunch of different things because a lot of men don't know how to dress themselves. I. I expect to see you in a new outfit all the time.

[Fightmaster]

You know how to dress yourself and, you know, famously. We have. We've done a few carpets together. Yeah. We've made an excellent plus one. I'll be your plus one any day of the week.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'm. I'm a dad, but I'm also a boyfriend.

[Fightmaster]

That's what I'm saying. And that's important.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's queer culture.

[Fightmaster]

That's queer culture. And I like. You are. You're so easy to move through the world with.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Thank you.

[Fightmaster]

And when I met you, we. I feel like you were very deeply in your sort of comedy bag. And in, you know, a lot of, like, tv, film, acting, and then so much more music was happening. What was the reason for that? That music sort of addition.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Joni Mitchell talks about it as, like, rotating your crops. And so I think that for artists that. That enjoy multiple forms of expression, I had been really lucky to have done comedy for about 10 years and to be on a few TV shows and to work in film and to write for tv. And so the crop that I was not watering was music. And so I just was kind of dedicated myself to throwing, you know, my whole self into it for the last year. And it's been fun. We've put out 12 songs.

[Fightmaster]

A lot has happened since I last saw you. I'm nervous, so.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh. I started working with wood.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, well, that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So you told me to show up like this and I was like, well, I was basically already wearing it.

[Fightmaster]

You were like, what? Did you make anything today yet?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I made a birdhouse last night. I'm waiting for the stain to dry.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God. Oh. Do you have, like, a particular bird you would like to visit?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You a bulbul? Oh, yeah, I love it. It's got a little hat on.

[Fightmaster]

Can you do like a little ASMR with that title of that bird, please?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I want a bulbul to come over.

[Fightmaster]

We want.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I want a bulbul to come in my tiny little house.

[Fightmaster]

I want a.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

See, that's about it. That's the only way that I can do femininity is like, as a full ass, like, porn star.

[Fightmaster]

You took it there. I. I'm. You could have went very masculine.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

The asmr when people are like, clickety crackity click. I'm like, ASMR is about tiny porn.

[Fightmaster]

Tumble out of bed and assemble to the kitchen for myself. If I had my long nails on, it'd be over for you. So you ever had acrylics before, Dylan? It's not part of your. That was a cr. That was a up. I am so sorry.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Can you imagine? I would break them. I would panic.

[Fightmaster]

But you with a big thing of Hubba Bubba in your mouth like this. Oh, smacking your gum, clicking.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. Doing this thing. Oh, I guess I could do that if I. If I lived like this. But if I had to move around in the world looking like this with acrylics on, I don't know, I would jump back in the Ohio River.

[Fightmaster]

But you've had so many, like, moments throughout your career now with all these different projects. Famously also Grey's Anatomy. And was there any similarities to you and that character, Kai?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I Liked Kai because the role that I had played before, which was on a show called Shrill, was way closer to Saufu. This character was like super warm and fun. Although right now I like have been talking about killing people. So, like, just take my word for it and. But Kai was really science forward, kind of on the neuro spicy spectrum. And so it was the most stepped out of self that I've ever been and I loved doing that.

[Fightmaster]

And do you prefer playing something like really close to home or do you like to be kind of far away?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I want to do a bunch of different shit. That's the. It's the. It's. Unfortunately, it's the crops thing again. Like, I. Playing close to self is fun if you don't have to do it all the time. And playing someone really different from you is fun. But then you're like, I do miss, like, getting to be bubbly. I get. I miss the warmth. So. Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Would you want to do a western together? Yeah, that's what after this is for. Well, today I was thinking I am a veil. Our guest tomorrow did cancel, so we have a good amount of time to get this done. Now as far as, like, where do you. Would you want to be an action? Like, I could see you as like a James Bond type.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I would like to play a villain next.

[Fightmaster]

Are you gonna ever tour, do you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Think went on tour this year? Yeah. Fun, fun, fun.

[Fightmaster]

How'd it go?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It was really fun. I had a little leather vest.

[Fightmaster]

A leather vest?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I had a little leather vest. I felt so cute.

[Fightmaster]

Was there anything under the leather vest or was it just the leather vest?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I had a T shirt because I didn't want them to see the big bazangas. I. It's. Listen, they.

[Fightmaster]

Do you ever, like, put a sports bra or something down there?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No, because. And unfortunately this is gonna get a lot of people off. But the kids are big bazaar. Cause they're just so sensitive. I can't put anything on top of them. I'm not even wearing a bra right now.

[Fightmaster]

No.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's how I talk about my tits from now on.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. And I talk about mine like this.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My big old fucking titties.

[Fightmaster]

Big tits.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My big gorgeous growing titties.

[Fightmaster]

My estrogen's really growing.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My estrogen's making these titty crops so big.

[Fightmaster]

Oh.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Came into the space, noticed my daughter's beautiful nupazongas.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah. Incredible on the dillonawa. Wait, I think we're cowboys.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, yeah. We kind of went. I guess that was New York.

[Fightmaster]

I've never thought about, like, Cowboys and boobs before.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I certainly have.

[Fightmaster]

Were you a horse person? I was gonna say horse girl was.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Like a horse girl. I think if you're a horse girl is gender neutral that I actually felt.

[Fightmaster]

That when I was about to say it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

And I knew that we had already said some crazy on here.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

So if. If that was the least problematic thing that was said today, me calling you horse girl.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Horse girl. That might as well mean trans. It's like horse girl. They are all. They're. You're either a lesbian or you're trans crazy though, or you're a trans lesbian.

[Fightmaster]

I was bitten by a horse when I was six and I never went back. Except on my 24th birthday in Napa, I did go wine tasting on a horse, but they didn't go that fast, so I wasn't even back in that much.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

What did you say to the horse? What were you wearing?

[Fightmaster]

Well, I was. I. I. The. The six year old time was my babysitter, Missy Boney. Hey, Missy. She had horses in her backyard. It was really dark. I was feeding it carrots. The horse thought my fingers were carrots.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It was topic making excuses for the horse.

[Fightmaster]

And then I went to the emergency room and they sewed him. No, they look fine. Like nothing ever happened. Really.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So wait, did the horse bite the fingers off?

[Fightmaster]

Not fully, no. No, not to knuckle. To knuckle.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So the next time you rode a horse, you were like, I'll do this again, but only if I'm drunk in Napa.

[Fightmaster]

Exactly. And I got Covid and strep throat that day from the horse. Probably sounds like it.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Done. I can't believe I came into you. Like I came in here today talking about birding and you acted like that was saying all of your animal stories are nuts.

[Fightmaster]

But I don't really with birds is the thing. And that's but because you are a bird. I was a little weirdly good at that. You were.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It was incredible.

[Fightmaster]

Hi there, it's Julia Louis Dreyfus. This fall, my podcast Wiser Than Me is back for season three with even more wisdom straight from some legendary old ladies. These chickadees have a lot to teach us. Every word is a lesson in living unapologetically and focusing on the style that really matters. From Lemonada Media Wiser than Me, Season 3 out now. Find it wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe to Lemonada Premium in the Apple Podcasts app and listen to every episode of season three A.D. free. Do you ever get hit with a.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Cringy memory of your 13 year old.

[Fightmaster]

Self out of nowhere and suddenly you're.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Panic sweating and laughing at the same time. Don't worry, don't worry. We all get that.

[Fightmaster]

It's because being an adolescent is one.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Of the most visceral shared experiences we have as people. And we want to talk about it. Join me, Penn Badgley and my two.

[Fightmaster]

Friends Nava and Sophie on podcrushed as we interview celebrity guests about the joys.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

And horrors of being a teenager and how those moments made them who they are today.

[Fightmaster]

New episodes of Podcrush are out now, wherever you get your podcasts. It's the D Hour. Now we're going to head to a very special segment on the Dylan Hour and it's actually really exciting that we have you on because it's usually what a girl wants, but today it's what do they wants?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I love that.

[Fightmaster]

What a girl wants. So as our diversity higher here at the Dylan Hour, Fightmaster. What do you want?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, what the hell?

[Fightmaster]

What do you want? What do you want?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I want a ranch. What do you want?

[Fightmaster]

Give me that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I want a ranch. I know that that's what I want, but like where? I'm not gonna say you fuckers are following me.

[Fightmaster]

Is there anything else that you really want in your life right now?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I. My obsession always is finding the, the best way to transmit messages. And I know that that sounds really like we're talking walkie talkies, but for me, like, the music was an excellent way to transmit like a message of just like queerness being the fucking best thing to do. And for a little bit of time that was being Kai on Grey's Anatomy. And for other periods of my life it's like literally just talking about goddamn birds. And so I'm. I'm always looking for the next in to deliver the message that being queer and being trans is the best thing that can ever happen to a kid.

[Fightmaster]

And here at the dyl, your message is be violent, kill. Let's make that clear.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Listen, they're going to try to kill you.

[Fightmaster]

That's a really beautiful answer, but I just wanted to remind us who we're sitting down with. And you know what? We're actually going to keep the what do they want theme for the day because I do have a she they in my bio, thank you very much. So they as in me, would like to learn the banjo. And I'm going to tell you why.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Okay?

[Fightmaster]

Because I was putting on my cowboy outfit today and I was like, you know, I'm just thinking about the theme and Then I really thought about this. Deep rooted, sort of whimsical. Do you remember when, like, that song was going by, like, Alabama, Arkansas, or, like, Hum Home? Is that the same song?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, it's like Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah, that shit. So could you imagine my power as a trans woman if I knew the banjo and wore, like, little pink bandana outfits and was like, hey, everybody, come to my house today. We're gonna have some dancing fun. Like, wouldn't. Could you imagine me on America's Got Talent? I changed my name. Maisie Mae Braids.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Why?

[Fightmaster]

Amazing that just because I can't be Dylan Mulvaney. I'm too polarizing to be an American's Got Talent up and coming star.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Are you all being nice to my kid?

[Fightmaster]

No, no, no, no, no. But I.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You can have my banjo. I'll give you my banjo.

[Fightmaster]

You have one. Yeah, yeah.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You can have mine. I don't. I don't play it anymore.

[Fightmaster]

Do you know how to do that?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Do you. What would, like. Do you make normal songs on that, or can they only be banjo songs?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You can make normal songs in them, but I will tell you, if you play it on a banjo, it wants to be a banjo song. There's something about it where the banjo is, like, this is actually mine now. Yeah, the banjo is doing the writing, so. This is unfair. Look how full that is.

[Fightmaster]

No, because I'm drinking the beer. Okay. It's PBR Water.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Water.

[Fightmaster]

What did you. Did you have, like, a college drink in Cincinnati?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

4 loco.

[Fightmaster]

Me too.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

God damn it. They were trying to kill us with that.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God. Did you ever have Everclear?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes. Oh, Lord. And sometimes you put a little bit of Everclear in the four Loco. Yes, yes.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. And we survived that.

[Fightmaster]

Well, because you would buy it in Kentucky at. Oh, what was that party store where you could buy all the.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Was like Party Source.

[Fightmaster]

Party Source. And you could get the unbelievable liquor and then you pour it into a big trash can.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, that.

[Fightmaster]

And then they would add all of, like, the. The dolphin gummies and stuff in the bottom.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes, yes. And you. You could make the 4Lo as ice if you wanted to and add it.

[Fightmaster]

We probably met at one of those parties and we just wouldn't even know.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

There's no way we'd know that.

[Fightmaster]

Medicine.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. I only have, like, a quarter of my brain left.

[Fightmaster]

And then, like, you can tell from both of us that we've. Something happened.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

It made me violent.

[Fightmaster]

Made you violent. Made me a woman.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's don't let your kids drink, and they will become transactional.

[Fightmaster]

Kentucky, where that's legal, is where you can get that alcohol, that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That devil's stuff, and you can't get it anymore. Well, you can get it. You can get it, but it's, like, adulterated. It doesn't have, like, 15 bottles of vodka in it anymore. And like, 14 Celsius.

[Fightmaster]

It's like text that I sent on four loco.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You had a phone?

[Fightmaster]

I had a phone. Phone.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

See? See? I don't remember even having a phone, like, in the vicinity when we had.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God, I had an iPhone 4.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I can't remember what era it was.

[Fightmaster]

It was. It was a bad era because you could do a lot of damage without really knowing.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Thank God. I know. I. That was like.

[Fightmaster]

You're more refined now. You haven't had one of those in a long time.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I would be dead. Like, I'm gonna. I'm gonna go home tonight. I'm gonna have a hangover in an hour.

[Fightmaster]

I know. And it's kind of early.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You hit 30. Everyone says this to you. You're not going to believe it.

[Fightmaster]

You want food after this?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Sure.

[Fightmaster]

Okay.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

You hit 30, everything changes. God tries to kill you. God says, enough. You weren't supposed to live this way.

[Fightmaster]

I thought those were supposed to be the best years of my life.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, they are, but it's because God's trying to kill you. So you're like, I might as well have fun.

[Fightmaster]

Oh. So are you having more fun in your 30s than you did your 20s?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

My 30s are one wonderful.

[Fightmaster]

You're obsessed.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'm obsessed with them. You spend all your 20s, like, thinking you're going to kill yourself because you're so sad. And then your 30s come, and you're like, relax, relax.

[Fightmaster]

Don't move. We've shared a lot today.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. But at least this is private.

[Fightmaster]

It's not over.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Because now it's time for one of my favorite segments here at the Dylan Hour. Overshare. Don't care. I've really let my guard down with you today as far as saying some crazy shit.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I don't remember saying anything offensive or weird at all.

[Fightmaster]

No. And I was thinking that we should just continue that by. We're gonna do a lightning round. We're gonna put two minutes on the clock. We've got a countdown, and you are going to do a rapid answer of these 10 questions. Are you ready?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yes.

[Fightmaster]

Okay. 5, 6, 7, 8. If you could switch bodies with one person for a day, who would it be?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Possums or horses?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Horses.

[Fightmaster]

Leather or denim?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Denim.

[Fightmaster]

Favorite horror movie?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

The one in the cave.

[Fightmaster]

Go to Cologne. Favorite scent?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, Tommy Bahama.

[Fightmaster]

Okay. Current favorite. Pop Girly.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I mean, chapel.

[Fightmaster]

Favorite song lyric of yours.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Your man's twiddling short thumbs and he's picking fights.

[Fightmaster]

Yeah, you are. I know you're a history nerd. A favorite period of history.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Late 1800s, early 1900s.

[Fightmaster]

Do you have any secret talents?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

So many it would fuck your ass up.

[Fightmaster]

Tell us when. Oh, never mind.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, my God. That was crazy.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Thank you. Wow. I did better with the timer. I think that made me feel safe.

[Fightmaster]

That. That was fast.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Now let's go back just for a quick sec. Horror film. The cave one.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, the one where that beautiful scent. Yes. Oh, my God.

[Fightmaster]

I don't with spelunking, do you? I've done.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'm not an idiot.

[Fightmaster]

I, I twice.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

People who spelunk are insane.

[Fightmaster]

Like, three times. But I really, I. I hated it every time.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah, no, they. They are, like, constantly talking about how trans people are ruining the American family. Spelunking is ruining the American family.

[Fightmaster]

And they're always trying to make you do it in crazy places.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Why would I spelunk? Are you kidding me? It's a cave. It's literally underground. I'm not doing that. I'm not an idiot. I'm in my house.

[Fightmaster]

That made for a really good. Have you done a scary movie yet?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I would love to do a scary movie.

[Fightmaster]

Well, I think that.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Let me chase somebody. Let me hunt somebody.

[Fightmaster]

We know. We know. Actually, I shouldn't have even asked. Never. Don't let this person anywhere near a horror film set.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah.

[Fightmaster]

Oh, this favorite lyric of yours, what song was that in?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

That's in Badman. I liked that one because that twiddle and short thumbs. When I sang, when I showed my friends, my guy friends, specifically my CIS guy friends, that song, every time I would get to that lyric, they'd go, ah. And it just hurt them in such a specific way. And when women hear the song, they don't, like, respond to it that way. They're like, oh, yeah, it's about him texting. But you say short thumbs to a man, and the man's like, well, you didn't have to go that hard.

[Fightmaster]

Oh. Oh, my God.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

He's probably a good guy.

[Fightmaster]

Probably. Okay, it looks like you already finished your drink off for what is usually our last segment called Last Call confessions. Yeah, why don't you pop open that beer, honey? So we have a caller and that has. Has called I was gonna say written in like, because we are in the olden days. We have a caller that has a question for us and we're going to listen to that now. But now Catherine's actually going to read something. Hello, honey. So I just came out as non binary. When people mess up your pronouns, what's.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

The best way to handle and how.

[Fightmaster]

Do you handle it?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I think that's tricky. I sometimes employ other people to do it for me because I think that that helps the person save face. And while that might not be the most direct path, I think sometimes it's longevity is more important. You want somebody to feel more comfortable with pronouns over a long period of time. So if they remember it, we're self protective. If they remember it as a time that they got scolded, it feels way different than if someone's like, oh, and it's, it's they for er. So I'll ask a friend.

[Fightmaster]

I agree. Like it's funny because now when I get misgendered as I'm like in this like masculine outfit, I, I almost am like, it's so wild to me that I kind of will just pass by it for a second. It also I, I feel like the reason that I kept they was almost to give people an alternate way out if they, if they felt so strongly against using she for me. Which plot twist. Most people that don't want to refer to me as a woman also don't want to use the word they for me.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Like feeling more gender fluid to me. Yes.

[Fightmaster]

But I do think I'm now in a place where like if someone is to misgender me and this is a very privileged one to be in, where it's like, oh, that's so crazy. But I think it's really a way of, I think finding whatever you leave that situation feeling in your most power and feeling like that person and you, depending on what your relationship is, is, is the most productive.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Yeah. Oh, I like that. Good job.

[Fightmaster]

Thank you. I, it's funny because like I, I used to make those. It's a they video of the days. Like that was when I was like. And, and now I get so nervous to talk about like any sort of non binary identity because it's so tricky and fragmented. But I also think we just gotta throw it out there.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I, I think when we can recognize that they're all in the same family in a more like honest and constant way, it will be in a better societal place.

[Fightmaster]

Everyone. It has been an absolute pleasure to have my dad, er, fightmaster on the Dylan Hour.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Thank you for having me. I love you.

[Fightmaster]

Where can they find you?

[Dylan Mulvaney]

I'm probably in the woods somewhere, but otherwise genderless Gap ad on Instagram and TikTok and Twitter.

[Fightmaster]

That's. I forget.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Oh, you're a fight master on Tick tock for spider content.

[Fightmaster]

Thank you so much.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

No thank you sweetie.

[Fightmaster]

We love you.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

We absolutely loved having you so much.

[Fightmaster]

Want even more of the Dylan Hour? Now is a great time to subscribe to Lemonada Premium. You'll get bonus content, outtakes and more from conversations with fabulous guests like Joe Locker and Dylan's dad, Jim Mulvaney.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

Just hit the subscribe button on Apple.

[Fightmaster]

Podcasts or for all other podcast apps, head to lemonadapremium.com to subscribe. That's lemonadapremium.com the Dylan Hour is a production of Lemonada Media. Our supervising producer is Jess Kreincic. Producers are Carmen Laurent, Keegan Zema and Aria Bracci. Audio and video production and engineering by Jordan Lynn, Ivan Koraev and Brian Castillo. Our SVP of weekly programming is Steve Nelson. Our theme song was composed by Daniel Mertzluft and arranged by Erin Kaufman. Special thanks to Megan Strickland executive producers Stephanie Whittles, Wax, Jessica Cordova, Kramer, Katherine Law and Dylan Mulvaney. You can find us online at Lemonada Media and you can find Dylan on TikTok and Instagram. Ylan Mulvaney Follow the Dylan Hour wherever you get your podcasts or listen. Ad free on Amazon Music with your prime membership.