The SNL Cold Open That Featured 'Epstein'

Summary

The Epstein Chronicles

Episode: The SNL Cold Open That Featured 'Epstein'

Host: Bobby Capucci
Date: June 1, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Bobby Capucci discusses the recent Saturday Night Live (SNL) cold open that featured a satirical reunion in hell between Alan Dershowitz and Jeffrey Epstein, as portrayed by Jon Lovitz and Adam Driver respectively. The segment, originally reported by the New York Post, is used as a springboard to reflect on how mainstream media is now openly tackling the Epstein case and its associates, especially the controversial figure of Alan Dershowitz. Capucci examines both the comedic value and the deeper cultural implications of the SNL sketch, and offers his own candid commentary on Dershowitz, media responsibility, and the public appetite for accountability in the Epstein saga.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recap of the SNL Cold Open

[00:59 – 06:00]

• Bobby summarizes the SNL skit: Alan Dershowitz (Jon Lovitz), after a heart attack, is sent to hell, where he’s greeted by Satan (Kate McKinnon) and Jeffrey Epstein (Adam Driver).
• Bobby notes the significance:

  "Saturday Night Live. Their first cold open of the season. And they just completely and utter savage. They utterly savage him this way. Absolutely perfect. Well done." [03:28]

• The skit also features comedic interactions with Satan, making Dershowitz the “GOAT of evil lawyers,” and delivers sharp barbs about his legal clients: Epstein, O.J. Simpson, and Claus von Bulow.
• Adam Driver’s Epstein delivers the memorable line, "just hanging," a dark reference to Epstein's death, to which Dershowitz responds with a nod to conspiracy theories.

2. Cultural Impact & Mainstreaming of the Epstein Scandal

[05:40 – 07:30]

• Bobby highlights the mainstream acceptance of skepticism about Epstein's death, as evidenced by the skit's jokes:

  "What it shows you is how much this has embedded itself in the mainstream. ... People don't believe what they're hearing in this story." [06:12]

• SNL's willingness to make such jokes signals society's ongoing distrust in the official narrative and deeper suspicion about elite impunity.

3. Dershowitz: Legal Ethics vs. Personal Conduct

[07:00 – 08:40]

• Capucci separates the concept of legal defense from personal culpability, yet he is clear about his disdain for Dershowitz:

  "I have no love for Alan Dershowitz. I've told you here on the podcast a hundred times, if you're going to believe Virginia about one thing, you have to believe her about the rest. ... I believe Virginia Roberts account of everything that happened." [06:48]

• He further argues that defending unpopular clients is fundamental to the legal system, but points out accusations that Dershowitz himself is implicated:

  "Alan Dershowitz is not like your regular kind of lawyer, in my opinion. ... With Epstein, it was a whole different thing." [07:56]

• Bobby reiterates that legal defense should not be confused with allegedly participating in the crimes.

4. Broader Cultural Roast & Closing Thoughts

[09:37 – 11:44]

• Other cameo characters in the SNL sketch (e.g., Mark Zuckerberg, the creator of "Baby Shark," Mr. Peanut) highlight how the show lampoons broader social and business figures perceived as villains or scapegoats.
• Capucci praises Jon Lovitz’s performance and encourages listeners to watch the sketch, emphasizing that seeing it is more impactful than hearing about it:

  "The skit last night, that SNL skit last night was absolutely, positively worth watching. ... The deliveries are great." [10:28]

• He points out that satire of this kind helps drive public scrutiny and hopes that "people continue this trend and keep blasting [Dershowitz] because ... Dershowitz deserves it." [08:20]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On SNL’s Satirical Roasting:

  "Satan even wants to meet him, that Satan is pumped up to meet him and that Satan's a huge fan of his. So for somebody like Dershowitz, who goes crazy if his name's even mentioned in the media, this has to be a real kick to the gut, right?" — Bobby Capucci [03:44]

• On Adam Driver as Epstein:

  "That line was perfectly delivered when Driver said it, folks. Kylo Ren came out and he dropped a bomb on these folks. Oh, you know, just hanging." — Bobby Capucci [05:15]

• On Legal Ethics:

  "While I find him reprehensible, I believe that everyone's entitled to defense in this country. And, you know, that's just the way it is." — Bobby Capucci [06:56]

• On Mainstreaming the Epstein Conspiracy:

  "Now that this is embedded in mainstream, you have Saturday Night Live doing a cold open ... I get it, right? It's more of an attack on Dershowitz. And that's fine, because Dershowitz deserves to be attacked, right?" [06:26]

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Important Timestamps

• 00:59: Bobby begins discussing the NY Post article covering the SNL cold open.
• 02:25: Description of Jon Lovitz as Alan Dershowitz and Adam Driver as Epstein.
• 05:15: Bobby reacts to Adam Driver’s "just hanging" line and its significance.
• 06:12: Societal doubt about Epstein's death reflected in mainstream comedy.
• 07:00: Bobby shares his views on Dershowitz, distinguishing between legal defense and criminal allegations.
• 09:37: Recap of other SNL hell residents, including Zuckerberg and Mr. Peanut.
• 10:28: Bobby recommends actually watching the SNL sketch for its impact.

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Tone and Analysis

Bobby Capucci maintains a direct, informal, and irreverent tone, blending humor with trenchant criticism of high-profile legal and societal figures connected to Epstein. He displays open skepticism about official narratives and a strong sense of advocacy for Epstein's accusers, particularly Virginia Giuffre. The episode leans on both skepticism and satire, leveraging the cultural lens provided by SNL’s sketch to comment on larger issues of justice, media complicity, and public engagement with scandal.

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Final Thoughts

This episode uses the SNL sketch as a cultural touchstone, showing how the Epstein scandal—and its cast of controversial figures—has become fodder for mainstream satire. Bobby’s commentary is blunt, unapologetic, and focused on keeping public attention on unresolved issues in the Epstein case. It’s a compelling listen for those following the cultural and legal aftermath of the Epstein scandal, and for anyone interested in how media and comedy shape public discourse around accountability and power.

Transcript

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[Bobby Capuchino]

All right, and now to the article. This article is from the New York Post and it was written by Lee Brown. The headline SNL Cold Open Alan Dershowitz Reunites with Just Hanging Jeffrey Epstein in Hell. And now obviously, I'm sure everyone has watched the clip by now or watched it, but I figured it was something that we should enter into the catalog so that we have it here and you know, we could refer back to it at some point, check out the clip and have another laugh. So to the article and oh, make sure if you haven't seen it yet, you can watch it on YouTube or if you click on the the Post link here, they have a hyperlink to it so you can check it out there as well. All right, so onto the article. President Trump impeachment lawyer Alan Dershowitz got sent to hell in the first Saturday Night live skit of 2020, getting reunited with pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, who said he was just hanging. And like I said, Adam Driver played Jeffrey Epstein in the skit and he did a pretty damn good job. It was pretty funny. SNL legend Jon Lovitz made a return to the comedy show to play Dershowitz, rehearsing his planned impeachment trial strategy FOR Senators Mitch McConnell and Susan Collins after terrifying them that he would compare Trump to his former clients, naming Epstein, O.J. simpson and Claus von Bulow Lovitz Dershowitz had a heart attack in the Cold Open and ended up in hell. Oh my gosh, look at that freaking Dershowitz. A red faced a red suited Satan played by Kate McKinnon says it's excitedly jumping up to give to give a hug, then pointing out he Wasn't even dying. So, yeah, if you haven't watched it yet, she, you know, Dershowitz supposedly has a heart attack and dies and goes to meet Satan. And when she gets. When he gets down there to meet Satan, who is played by Kate McKinnon, she gets all pumped up about it that she's actually getting to meet Dershowitz. I'm gonna send you back upstairs in a minute. Honestly, I just really wanted to meet you. McKinnon's horn headed Satan gushed, I never say this, I'm a huge fan. No, seriously, you're the goat. Satan told him, referring to the greatest of all time and saying she was about to fangirl out so hard. So they're savaging Dershowitz here right now, saying he is such an evil, disgusting SOB that Satan even wants to meet him, that Satan is pumped up to meet him and that Satan's a huge fan of his. So for somebody like Dershowitz, who goes crazy if his name's even mentioned in the media, this has to be a real kick to the gut, right? Saturday night. Saturday Night Live. Their first cold open of the season. And they just completely and utter savage. They utterly savage him this way. Absolutely perfect. Well done. Satan then interviewed Dershowitz for her podcast, saying she invented the audio shows where the lawyer said he would represent anyone who is famous enough to get me on tv. Oh, boy. Hilarious. Star wars actor Adam Driver, the episode's host, then walked out as late pedophile Epstein, who Dershowitz had represented, even getting accused of having. Even getting accused of having sex with one of the pedophile's accusers. Asked what he was doing there, Driver's Epstein replied, just hanging, drawing gasps at the quip about the multi millionaire pedophile who was found hanging in his Manhattan federal lockup in August. And that line was perfectly delivered when Driver said it, folks. Kylo Ren came out and he dropped a bomb on these folks. Oh, you know, just hanging. It was absolutely hilarious, and I was dying watching it. And if you haven't seen it yet, me telling you about it obviously does not do it justice. Make sure you click on the link and you go check it out. When Epstein said it was too bad I was murdered, his lawyer seemed to hint at widely spread conspiracy theories that the pervert was killed by famous friends, replying, I know. Trust me, I know. And while that's a joke for them and they're just trying to throw it in there, what it. What it shows you is how much this has embedded itself in the mainstream folks how much this whole entire Jeffrey Epstein situation has gone mainstream. And people don't believe what they're hearing in this story. Right? It's not like, you know, it's some crazy guy just saying, oh, this is what. This didn't happen. There's no. There's like no evidence to prove the narrative that they're trying to feed us. Zero evidence, folks. So, you know, now that this is embedded in mainstream, you have Saturday Night Live doing a cold open, the first one of the season. And I get it, right? It's more of an attack on Dershowitz. And that's fine, because Dershowitz deserves to be attacked, right? I have no love for Alan Dershowitz. I have zero love for Alan Dershowitz. I've told you here on the podcast a hundred times, if you're going to believe Virginia about one thing, you have to believe her about the rest. Right? So I believe Virginia Roberts account of everything that happened. In my opinion, what she said about all of these people is true. And I, you know, I understand that these networks and shows, like even snl, they have to tread lightly, but I wish they would have went a little bit further. Right. It's not just because Dershowitz has defended these people. No, that's not the case. At least not for me. While I find him reprehensible, I believe that everyone's entitled to defense in this country. And, you know, that's. That's just the way it is. But at the same time, I'm not going to forget that he is being accused of actually abusing Virginia Roberts, folks. All right? There is no way in hell that him representing O.J. or von Bulow or anybody else or Epstein or anyone is worse than him engaging in the actual act. Right? So don't get me wrong. I think he's reprehensible. And personally, as a lawyer, I don't think I could ever defend these people. But I understand that as a lawyer, that's your job. I mean, it's just the way it is. These guys become lawyers. They don't, you know, for the most part, they don't pick and choose who they're going to defend, as in, like, depending on the crime. Right? These lawyers, they try and defend their clients as to the best of their ability. And, you know, while I believe that his defense of Epstein did go overboard. Right. He, Alan Dershowitz is not like your regular kind of lawyer, in my opinion. Alan Dershowitz is the kind of guy that gets into the back room and starts making, you know, all or all sorts of crazy deals. So it's not like he's just, you know, defending these people in the court of law and, you know, doing his best to get them off. Oh, no, it was a whole different thing with Epstein. Right. So I can understand why the, the outrage of him defending Epstein was there, but the other clients, I really can't get too fired up about. Because at the end of the day, no matter how good your lawyer is, if you're guilty and the state has a quality case, you're going to be in a lot of trouble. Right. Because unless, of course, you're Epstein and you're being protected by intelligence. The state loves their convictions, boy, especially the feds. So look, Dershowitz is a completely and disgusting gross individual. And him getting fired up and roasted like this on Saturday Night Live for all of the people who might not be that familiar with the case, for all of them to see as well, it is much welcomed and I hope that people continue this trend and keep blasting him because I kept my underwear on. Dershowitz deserves it. He deserves the screw the scrutiny. And he deserves to be asked a lot of seriously hard questions.

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[Bobby Capuchino]

Others greeting them in hell included the man who wrote the kids song Baby Shark Flow from the progressive TV ads and recently killed off Mr. Peanut, who said he was there because he took out a lot of first graders with peanut allergies. Even McConnell, played by Beck Bennett and wrapped in white towels joined them, saying he just used hell as a sauna. Last out was Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, played by Alex Moffat. As hell's it guy there to fix the cable in time for the impeachment trial. I just want everyone to know that I don't endorse evil. I just help millions of people share it. Moffat Zuckerberg said, even for me, that's haunting. Satan replied, ending the skit. Well, I, you know, one thing I will say about the impeachment trial, I don't think you're gonna have to worry about, you know, fixing the cable in time. The, you know, nobody's really watching it. Unfortunately folks, it's just political theater and it doesn' seen that are too many people are that interested in it. But the, the skit last night, that SNL skit last night was absolutely, positively worth watching. So if you have not seen it yet, folks, me reading it obviously does not do it the justice it deserves. You have to watch it. The deliveries are great. And I'm not really a big John Lovitz fan, but he did a pretty damn good job in this skit. And it's funny that, that he was in this because I was just talking to my girlfriend Carrie and I was telling her the other day, I forget what show was on tv, but Jon Lovitz was in it and I was like, man, care for John Lovitz all that much except for some of the stuff he did on Saturday Night Live. And lo and behold, a few days later, there he is back on Saturday Night Live. So if you haven't checked it out, make sure you do that. The video is in the article so you can click on the the hyperlink inside of the description box and go to the article there or just go to the New York Post itself and check it out. And yeah, it's definitely well worth the watch. All right folks, I will be back tomorrow morning with the usual morning update and yeah, we'll keep it rocking and rolling. If you'd like to contact me, you can do that@bobby capuchirotonmail.com that's B O B B Y C A P U C c [e-mail] if you would like to help.

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