← The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast
The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast
I’ll Never Forget What My Ex-Girlfriend Told Me (w/ Fr. Mike Schmitz)
00:08:23
When someone gets chosen instead of you, how should you respond? Fr. Mike Schmitz reminds us that God has a unique plan for each and every one of us. When others are blessed by being chosen, there is often a hidden burden that comes with it. We tend to see the blessing, but we forget the weight that accompanies it. Instead of giving in to jealousy or self-pity, remember this: everyone has their own story. If God didn’t choose you for what you were hoping for, it’s not because you were overlooked, it’s because He has something different, and perhaps even better, in store for you.
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I remember saying, I'm so sorry. I think I need to go to seminary next year. Her first words were this. Her first words were, hi, my name is Father Mike Schmitz, and this is Ascension Presents. So you know how when you're growing up, you have to choose teams? Kickball, dodgeball, softball, basketball. All the balls, and you line up and they have two captains and, okay, who's the one who gets picked? Who's the one who gets picked last? Whenever we see an example of someone getting picked, there can be this wound in us. I was thinking about the story of David. So if you remember the story of David, I think it's 1st Samuel, chapter 16, where Samuel is sent by God to Jesse. Jesse has a bunch of sons. Jesse's a friend. He's been a good friend of mine, good friend of mine, bunch of sons. And God tells Samuel that one of Jesse's sons is going to be the next king of Israel to replace Saul. And so if you know the story, Samuel shows up and they all come out trembling like, what do you want? What do you want from us? And. And Jesse brings out his sons. He sees Eliab. Eliab's the oldest, and. And he looks like a king. And the Lord says to Samuel, nope, that's not him. Not him. The next son, I think. Abinadabinadeb. Not him. Next son, all the next seven sons. Finally, David. And he gets chosen. When you hear that story, who do you identify with? Or even, like, when it comes to the apostles, right? Here's Jesus who goes up on the high mountain to pray all night. The next morning he comes down and he chooses from the disciples. He chooses twelve apostles be with him to be sent out by him. I always think of this question, who do you identify with in that story? Now, if you're someone who's like, I'm kind of the main character in my life, you might identify with David. You might identify with the 12 apostles, which is fine. If you're someone who knows what it's like to not be picked, then you might identify with the older brothers of King David. Or you might identify with the other disciples who were. Weren't chosen to be apostles. And the reality is, of course, every one of us knows what it's like to not be picked. Every one of us knows what it's like that someone else got chosen and I didn't get chosen. Well, how do you deal with that? What do we do when we're not the one chosen? What do we do when we're not the one picked I'm thinking about this a lot lately because we have a tendency maybe to either be jealous or in reality, to feel sorry for ourselves. Not just feel sorry for ourselves, but just to feel badly, to feel like, am I not good enough? Am I not enough? I didn't get picked for this thing. I'm jealous of them for having been picked. And also, what's wrong with me that I didn't get picked? And in this, I want to highlight two things. Number one, here's David. He gets chosen. And imagine being the other brothers, jealous. What's David chosen for? We know this. You've read the rest of the story. He's not chosen for honor. He's not chosen because he's going to be praised the rest of his life for or glorified the rest of his life. He's chosen because he has been set apart, chosen to be this king. And he's going to suffer. Like he's going to have to fight. He's going to be on the run. I mean, we could look at. And you've heard this a thousand times, right? We cannot judge someone else's life based off their highlight reels. Yet we do that. Here's the moment. David gets chosen. 1 Samuel, chapter 16. He's set apart. He's picked. Picked for what? The apostles. Here they are. Jesus comes on the mountain, says, okay, picks these 12 to be with them. But then to do what? We know this. We know that 11 or those apostles, outside from Judas, virtually all died for their faith in Jesus. They did all suffer for their faith in Jesus. They were. All their lives were completely disrupted because Jesus picked them, because he chose them. And so, yes, that was a blessing, right? For David to be set apart was a blessing. For the apostles to be set apart was a blessing. But sometimes we see other people's blessings and don't realize the burden because we see their highlight reels. We forget the fact that, yeah, David was blessed. Here David was chosen. He was picked, but also his life was incredibly broken, that his life was rarely settled, that by being blessed, he was blessed with a burden. And yes, it was that holy burden. Yes, it was a burden from the Lord. Same with the apostles. They were blessed, but they were blessed with a burden. The burden of needing to leave their family and their friends and their homes and their jobs, to leave everyone and to go off proclaiming the name of Jesus. They were blessed, but it was a burden. And so, again, I can't be envious of someone's blessing because I don't necessarily want their burden the second part is this. The second part is where we ask that question. And maybe the deeper one, not just envy or jealousy, but it's, wait, what's wrong with me that I wasn't good enough to be chosen? And the reality is it's not that you and I weren't good enough to be chosen, it's that we weren't chosen for this. It's not as if God didn't have a plan for Eliab's life. It's not as if God didn't have a plan for the other disciples lives. He did. Of course he does. But it wasn't that. There's not one way to serve Jesus. Here is David. Yep. Called to be the king. Eliab, I'm going to call you to serve some other way. Yes. Here's Simon Peter, set apart to be not only one of the apostles, but the chief apostle. And the other guys, other disciples, other men and women, have another call for you. I know I've mentioned my vocation story a couple times in different contexts, and sometimes people get really upset when I share my vocation story because I was dating a girl for about three, three years before I just earned a call to the seminary. And maybe I've shared this with y' all here before, but to keep it short is I was a missionary in Central America. We were dating, it was our third year of dating. And at one point I just, I realized after years and years of praying that I think God was calling me to enter seminary. And so, long story short, one night we had this talk on the phone and I had to tell her. And I remember saying, I'm so sorry, I think I need to go to seminary next year. Her first words were this. Her first words were, well, I knew this was a possibility before we started dating. She's like, we talked about this even before when we were just friends. You shared that this was something that you're wrestling with. And I'm like, literally I'm weeping. And I said, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And she said, no. And this is the part we need to pay attention to. She said, no, listen, if this is what God wants for you, then this is what God wants for me too. This is part of God's call in my life. This is part of God's story for my life. And there's something so critical about this. David's older brother wasn't called to be king, but he was called to something else. We just don't read about it in the Bible because that wasn't the point of the story. The point of the story was how Israel got a king. But it's very, very critical for Eliab's story that God didn't pass over him as a human. Jesus said, no, you just aren't going to be the king. I have something else in store for you. And so when someone else gets chosen, when someone else gets picked, we can't be envious of their blessing because we don't know their burden. We can't be envious of what God gives them because we don't know what it's going to cost them. And also, we can't accuse ourselves of being less or not worth choosing. It's just that that wasn't our call. That wasn't what God had chosen for us. He's chosen something else. I've said this before, but you're not an extra in someone else's vocation story. We're not the main character. None of us are. Jesus is the main character. It's his story. But he invites us to play a certain role. He invites us to play a part in. In his story of rescuing the world. So I can look at someone else's highlight reel or I can attend to God. Where are you calling me? Because God has not forgotten you. He is calling you for something. He's calling you to something. The great adventure of life is God. What is that thing? Help me say yes, no matter what it is. Anyways, from all of us here at Ascension presents. My name is Father Mike. God bless.