Pastors In Stem - The 2025 Wrap-Up

Summary

The Friend Zone Podcast

Episode: "Pastors In Stem - The 2025 Wrap-Up"

Hosts: Dustin Ross, Hey Fran Hey (Francesca), Assanté
Release Date: December 17, 2025

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Episode Overview

This special year-end episode of The Friend Zone sees the hosts—Dustin, Fran, and Assanté—reflecting on the major themes, conversations, social issues, and memorable moments from their 2025 slate of episodes. In line with the show’s core ethos—mental health, mental wealth, and mental hygiene—the team does a deep-dive into everything from religious scams, extreme weather events, gun culture, political frustrations, and the rise of AI, to pop culture highlights and the evolution of Black entertainment. With their signature blend of humor, candor, community, and vulnerability, The Friend Zone crew offers both a critical recap and a celebration of the show's tenth year running.

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Key Discussions & Insights

1. Viral "Pastor Scams" and Church Ethics

• Highlight: The episode opens with a viral story about a pastor asking for $10,000.90 in 90 seconds, promising multi-millionaire status as a reward—all with a life-sized QR code projected behind him.

  • Dustin: "He stood up there talking about... write the check! If you got it, get on up and write the check." (06:45)
  • The hosts lambast these exploitative, performative displays of faith and discuss the importance of ethical giving in church.
  • Fran: Contrasts predatory behavior with her local church’s nonjudgmental giving structures, emphasizing dignity and lack of pressure.

• Memorable Quote:

  • Dustin: "That's predatory, not pastoral. And I ain't giving you shit. I feel like Vera Walker in Harlem Nights... 'me and my girls, we ain't giving them shit.'" (05:40)

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2. Year-End Reflection: Social Crisis, Political Apathy & Community Resilience

• Discussion of major 2025 events:

  • West Coast Flooding: Oregon, Washington, and Montana devastated without adequate federal aid; impact on farmlands and workers.
  • Dustin: "These dumb motherfuckers in DC... they’re so goddamn stupid they’re not even thinking about how crucial these offices are to our natural resources." (14:12)
  • ICE Raids & Labor Anxiety: Chilling accounts of ICE’s aggressive presence in agricultural communities, including stories of citizens and legal residents being detained.
  • Gun Violence: Mass shooting at Brown University and lack of substantive gun control measures; the ease of obtaining guns as a point of anxiety for Fran and listeners.
    • Fran: "Something about that... my mind was kind of like, what the fuck?... I could go pick it up the next day. It’s scary." (23:12)

• Community & Resource Sharing: The hosts repeatedly note the importance of grassroots mutual aid, the increasing need for mental health and legal aid links in their show descriptions, and shout out listeners and listeners’ personal stories.

• Memorable Quote:

  • Francesca: "It’s really been a 'we got us' ass year because don’t seem like anyone else does." (19:19)

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3. The Friend Zone’s 2025 By the Numbers

• Show Stats:

  • 49 episodes released despite a mid-year break.
  • Listeners in 97 countries; U.S., U.K., Canada, South Africa, and France are top regions.
  • Over 500% increase in shares.

• Celebrating Their Longevity:

  • Ten years in podcasting, unique for their focus on original, guest-free conversation.

• Memorable Quote:

  • Fran: "We don’t lean on guests, we don’t lean on salaciousness. We really come and bring conversation, which I think is really hard to do. 10 years in..." (154:11)

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4. Notable Episodes and Recurring Segments

• Deep Dives:

  • Fatphobia & Healthcare: "Heavy Conversation" (coinciding with a viral lawsuit of weight discrimination in rideshares).
  • Death & Adulting: With guests Jaden & XD—handling loss, obituaries, and the unspoken labor of being the “new adult” in families.
  • AI & Tech Anxiety: Main character syndrome, AI relationships, autonomous robots ("Mouth and Height"), scam concerns, and the ethical quandaries of chatbots and AI in daily life.
  • True Crime & Bible Study Mashups: “Three Hots and a God,” “Briefcase of Spaghetti,” and the impact of stories like Natalia Grace on their signature “crime zone” episodes.
  • Pop Culture & Black Entertainment: A look back on Black TV/film from "Insecure" to "Queen & Slim" (“10 Years Black”).
  • Financial Literacy & Ethical Investing: Lessons learned after car accidents, navigating insurance, gap coverage, and responsible investing.
  • Church & Giving: The complex relationship between faith, community, and predatory religious practices.
  • Community-Based Knowledge: Continued praise for community-sourced insights—financial advice, mental health tips, practical adulting.

• Listener Engagement:

  • Recurring 'Gated Community' and SoundCloud comments, amplifying everyday stories and connecting show themes to real-world listener experiences.
  • Notable: Multiple listeners wrote in about their own gun ownership journeys, struggles with car insurance, security, and the realities of immigrant and farming families.

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5. Signature Quotes & Standout Interactions

• On the Predatory Pastor Scam:
  • Francesca: “What they do is, they had a carpenter build these really beautiful houses... if you’re able, you just put the money inside the little house and that's it.” (07:02)
• On Administrative Negligence:
  • Dustin: "That ain't got shit to do with politics... that’s just keeping people alive, human shit." (18:36)
• On Political Exhaustion:
  • Dustin: “I definitely made some changes in my consumption of certain things... I use the show as an outlet. In my day to day life, I create a bubble...” (52:16)
• On AI & Surveillance:
  • Francesca: “It should be a full fucking stop for everybody, right? It should be something that's so shocking...” (66:55)
• On Entering a New Decade:
  • Asante: "I'm proud of every one of our episodes—but what are you most proud of?" (159:38)
• On Utility Over Virality:
  • Fran: “Although I am... fighting for your attention, I just want to be useful, you know? And I think that's what I feel is going to be a huge turning point for the next coming years of content creation, because people are tired." (159:38)

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Important Timestamps by Segment

| MM:SS | Segment | |------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:10-07:32| Pastor $10k QR code scam and church giving practices | | 13:10-19:52| Flooding in the PNW, ICE, farmworkers, government neglect | | 21:29-23:37| Mass shootings, Brown Univ. incident, US gun culture | | 45:16-47:25| Show stats: 49 episodes, top countries, growth celebration | | 53:10-56:55| Listener emails: guns, politics, safety, Dex Mitchell shoutout | | 61:55-64:59| Bible study moments, justice orgs, ICE escalation | | 89:15-91:18| “Heavy Conversation” on fatphobia, vulnerability, and medical bias | | 124:01-125:33| Renaissance World Tour, fan encounters, and drag queens | | 147:16-148:56| “Midnight Library”/Parallel lives, the book club highlight | | 154:11-157:02| Reflections on what the show’s meant—utility, longevity, pivoting |

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Notable Quotes (with Speaker & Timestamp)

• Dustin Ross (05:40): "That's predatory, not pastoral. And I ain't giving you shit. I feel like Vera Walker in Harlem Nights..."
• Francesca (19:19): "It’s really been a 'we got us' ass year because don’t seem like anyone else does."
• Asante (23:12): "I just had to get a little background check and I could go pick it up the next day. Just that easy. Wow. Yeah, it's scary."
• Francesca (154:11): "We don’t lean on guests... 10 years in and still have all this increase."
• Dustin Ross (159:38): "To me, being able to have that sort of impact with our audience is why we do this shit in the first place."
• Francesca (159:38): “I just want to be useful... people are tired of the over consumption, the hyper consumerism, the constant selling... I just want to continue to bring information that you’re like, yo, I needed that.”

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Overall Tone & Recurring Themes

• Balance of Levity & Heaviness: Hosts manage to blend humor and gravitas naturally, using laughter as relief from the grind of adulting, political frustration, and trauma.
• Listening & Community: Deep respect for listener experiences, vulnerability, diversity of opinion, and practical wisdom.
• Social Awareness: Relentless focus on the intersection of race, policy, mental health, and daily survival, especially in Black and immigrant communities.
• Introspection & Evolution: Commitment to ethical growth, mental hygiene, and the power of reflection zones—10 years strong, still shaping new goals.

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Final Thoughts

The 2025 wrap-up episode of The Friend Zone is quintessentially itself: insightful, honest, funny as hell, blazingly relevant, and deeply committed to moving listeners into a new year both informed and uplifted. As always, it’s a masterclass in community-building, radical vulnerability, and Black cultural commentary—making space for both the hard truths and the real joy that got listeners through another year.

Closing Reminder:
“Be kind. Happy holidays. Stay black and protect your magic.”
(Francesca, 165:01)

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Transcript

[Asante]

Meat Song. His fantasy lineup not so great. A no name QB and an injured rookie running back. But you know what is great? Getting a single line unlimited plan for.

[Dustin Ross]

$35 a month and a free Samsung Galaxy A15.5G at Cricket Wireless. No injuries, just reliable service.

[Asante]

Cricket may temporarily slow data speeds if the network is busy. Must bring your number to Cricket on select unlimited plan.

[Dustin Ross]

Pay $40.

[Asante]

First month new lines only. First month service charge and tax due at sale. Cricket 5G is not available everywhere.

[Dustin Ross]

Fees, terms and restrictions apply. See cricketwireless.com for details.

[Asante]

The holidays are back at Starbucks.

[Commercial Voice]

So share the season with a peppermint mocha, Starbucks signature espresso, velvety mocha and cool peppermint notes topped with whipped cream and dark chocolate curls together is the best place to be at Starbucks.

[Francesca]

Hey Friendzone fam. Thank you for listening to this week's episode. I did wanna remind you that we will be starting our winter break this week, but we will be returning on Wednesday, January 21st of 2026. Make sure you're following us on all of our socials and just in case you don't know where those are, I wanted to jump on and give you a quick rundown. You can find us on [e-mail] TheFriendZonePodcast we're actually gonna have additional content on there the next couple of weeks, so make sure you join us. You can find us on Facebook, we'[e-mail] TheFriendZonePodcast on Twitter our handle is rendzonepod. Same on Bluesky FriendZone Pod. You can find us on Instagram the FriendZonePod. You can find us on TikTok, the FriendZone Pod. And lastly you can find us on SoundCloud and soundcloud.com the Friend Zone Podcast. We do wish we could have it all be just one uniform handle, but y' all know how the Internet goes. We tried our best. Thank you for listening, thank you for sharing and commenting. We'll miss you guys and we will see you next year. Happy holidays and be safe.

[Dustin Ross]

Welcome to the Friends.

[Francesca]

Every time I'm in the Zone.

[Asante]

My name is Dustin.

[Francesca]

I'm Francesca, also known as. Hey friend. Hey.

[Asante]

My name is Asante.

[Dustin Ross]

This is the Friend Zone. If you don't sit your goddamn ass down with them spaces in between your teeth.

[Francesca]

Perfect way to end.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah right. A high note. This is real quick. This week there was a a slingly sloppy pastor. I don't even know what church this was at. I don't know where he Was. But this got the gall. He, he. And this is coming from the good folks over at the neighborhood talk, specifically you, Kyle. It's the end of the year. What's up? Okay, so.

[Asante]

So.

[Dustin Ross]

A portly pastor, okay.

[Asante]

Oh my God.

[Dustin Ross]

Got up a portly pastor in the pulpit, okay, Got up there with a QR code behind him, okay, Saying that God is gonna make one of them a multi millionaire if they give $10,000 and 90 cents.

[Francesca]

Oh, God.

[Dustin Ross]

If you gonna do it, get it now. Write the check, end quote. I'm gonna play this clip and we're gonna do what we do best.

[Asante]

Steam.

[Francesca]

Steam.

[Dustin Ross]

Because he definitely had to add it to actually the A stand for in this case. Hold on, here we go.

[Francesca]

Whoa.

[Asante]

Probably 20 years ago, but Lord said, I want to make a multi, multi millionaire out of someone, but they have to sow $10,000. He said, they have to do that within 90 seconds if you're gonna do it, get it now. Write the check. If you do this, God said, I'm going to make you a multi, multi millionaire one day. There's a person in here. You sold that within 90 seconds. It should be less than that. God said, I'm gonna show you my face. I'm gonna show you who I am. And for the rest of your days, everywhere the soul of your feet shall trot. You shall possess the land and every the Kalasupa and everything your hand shall touch.

[Dustin Ross]

Did you hear that crack? Did you hear that crock of that? He was spitting it from the pulpit. Now it's 20, 25. Ain't even got SNAP benefits. They with food stamps. And you getting your uncle fields present day looking ass. Uncle Phil, you know where he at, okay? And you getting your ass up there looking like that, spewing that filthy ass to that congregation of people who showed up because they needed something to hold on to. Because they probably going through shit they self whether they got money or not. Some of the people with the most money are the most unhappy, most haunted people on the face of the earth. Even if they got the 10k, you know what I'm saying? And you stood up there talking about. My thing is this. They love saying God said. And God said. Who he say it to? Because I haven't heard it. I haven't heard nothing. We not on text it nothing. I haven't heard anything saying Give me $10,000 in 90 seconds. God don't care about no $10,000 in 90 damn seconds. How I wish them Olsen twins was sitting next to me. How rude. How rude that's disgusting. And anybody that go for that, it's your fault if you get your ass in the middle of that aisle. And then he went on to say, I couldn't play the clip because you can only take so much bullshit, right? So at the end of the clip, he went on to say, like, he needed 30 people to give 200 dol. And let the women get to the middle aisle first. Especially women that want to get to the middle aisle. That's predatory. That ain't pastoral. It's predatory. And I ain't giving you shit. I feel like Vera Walker in the Harlem Knights. Remember, she said, because me, Bugsy Calhoun can kiss my ass. Because me and my girls, we ain't giving them shit. I ain't giving them a goddamn dime. And nobody else that sound like that, that ain't godly, okay? That ain't what Dej Loaf was talking about. What she say, Rock that all white when I'm feeling godly? That's not what that is. That's why he had on all black when he said it. Yeah, $10,000 in 90 seconds. And then did you hear his ass talking about some right to check? If you got it, get on up and write the check.

[Francesca]

And you say he had a literal QR code behind him.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm going to send it to you because I cannot look at this. You have got to see this friend and Asante. Absolutely. I wish I knew what church it was at. It's on the neighborhood talk. But they didn't listen. None of his information, which they probably knew what they were doing. For those of y' all on Patreon, you can see.

[Asante]

Oh, no.

[Dustin Ross]

Now, yes. So Fran and Asante at this point can confirm that, yes, he does look like Uncle Phil. Yes. Yes, he is preaching with a QR code, a life size, the QR Code. Bigger than you.

[Francesca]

Seriously, this is crazy, y'. All. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Can't believe it. Kiss our ass. And anybody that gave him that damn money, the Lord told me, if you don't give me one, too.

[Asante]

You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Next 30 seconds, I'm a beach.

[Francesca]

Meanwhile, as well, the church we go to out here, they don't even pass collection plates because they said that they understand the pressure that that adds to households when people might not have it for real. For real. But feel, you know, because they're being watched or the pressures of the church, whatever reasoning they're going to give, you know? And so what they do is they have. They had a carpenter build these really beautiful houses, and they look like bird houses. And they're at the front and at the end, if you're able, you just put the money inside the little house and that's it.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, you know, I grew up.

[Francesca]

I think that's how it should be.

[Dustin Ross]

And all my life they had what's called a country. And I'm not saying anything about anything else connected to the experience. We just talk about the giving process.

[Francesca]

Right, right, right.

[Dustin Ross]

They always had a custom built, you know what I'm saying? Contribution box is what they called it.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

It was always in the back of the building. And people, anytime during the service or at the end, whatever, you could probably drop whatever you're gonna drop in there if you want to give. And it literally was labeled contribution box. And that's what you drop your in or whatever. If you're gonna give that. Passing the collection, play all that judgment and. And people looking at what, what you gave, how much?

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

And then to fix your mouth, your fish lip mo had bass lips. You fix your mouth to ask for $10,000 and say you got to give it in 90 seconds. And then did you hear him say it should be quicker than that.

[Francesca]

Let's see.

[Dustin Ross]

10. Pastor, where your money at? Son of a. Cuz your.

[Asante]

Are you matching today?

[Dustin Ross]

Where your money?

[Francesca]

Yeah, get it rolling. You first.

[Dustin Ross]

You talking about he going to make. And if it's that simple, God just told me he gonna make some people a multi. Multi meaning every. Where your feet tried, you shall own the land. You possess the land. You the one look like your feet tried. You look like you. You actually trot. You look like you trot around. You don't even walk. You.

[Francesca]

Y'. All.

[Dustin Ross]

This is what you look like.

[Asante]

Very dark. It really is.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm sick of the man. If your mama is in a church like that, have a conversation with her. If your father is in a church like that, have a conversation with siblings, close friends. Have a conversation you can have. Faith is very personal and private and there's nothing that anybody can cast judgment on. And I'm by no means doing that. Serve who you want to serve and how you want to serve them. But there needs to be an ethical component then it needs to be well intentioned, good natured. It can't be predatory. You can't really. Nobody. God ain't never going to ask for a certain amount of money in a certain amount of time.

[Asante]

He ain't.

[Francesca]

He.

[Dustin Ross]

At least he ain't said it to me yet.

[Francesca]

Right, right.

[Dustin Ross]

Has he said it to either of y'?

[Commercial Voice]

All?

[Dustin Ross]

I don't think so.

[Francesca]

And as a, and listen, as a business person, I understand that the church has to be able to keep the lights on.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

The venue has to be paid for. It has to be heated. You know, like, there's cost and I.

[Asante]

Guess there's a component to it.

[Dustin Ross]

Honey, the flames are hell.

[Francesca]

And the employees that work there need to be paid. Like, let's be real here. We understand that there's a cost for this house to run, but I just think it's like. Yeah. Overdoing.

[Asante]

I mean, like, doesn't you use the perfect word, predatory? Like, you know, if it's business, religion, politics, there's always gonna be some predatory people just waiting in the wings to do something. And hearing another, I was about to say hearing another car salesman preacher, it's like, well, ooh, here we go.

[Francesca]

Lord, how. Ooh.

[Asante]

What kind of person, the nerve of you.

[Francesca]

What kind of person are you to do that, to weaponize that?

[Dustin Ross]

That's obviously a person that's getting his cut off the top very clearly. That money ain't going to no building fund. Okay. Yeah. Like, I just, I, I, I probably.

[Francesca]

Need a new car. Who knows?

[Dustin Ross]

Probably do. He definitely needs some new doctor shows because I know his feet got to be burnt to hell rotten. When you, when you do like that.

[Francesca]

Your body, you pay for it.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. You start getting toes falling all gang green popping like aching. Yeah.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

And that's what you get because you're bad inside. I don't believe in that at all. And I think that's horrible. And God bless them people because they gave from the right place in their heart. If it was fear based or not, that came from a good place. I hate like him.

[Francesca]

Yeah, I do.

[Dustin Ross]

So anyway, what's going on? K Low K. No, you did it.

[Asante]

K Low K. It's a holiday.

[Francesca]

Hey, this is the end of the year. Can y' all believe we here?

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Asante]

Wow.

[Francesca]

Asante. Wow.

[Asante]

Cause you know, now that you say it, I'm thinking like, this is the last time you're gonna hear 2025 on here. Like, that's crazy.

[Francesca]

Wow, man.

[Asante]

It was just New Year's Eve.

[Dustin Ross]

See, it was just New Year's Eve.

[Francesca]

It's weird though. Cause this year flew, but it didn't.

[Asante]

Right.

[Francesca]

Somehow it's both of those things this year for me.

[Dustin Ross]

Move quick. I don't know what it was, but like, I feel like literally like.

[Francesca]

You.

[Dustin Ross]

Know what I'm saying?

[Asante]

You was a boy on Rome blender.

[Dustin Ross]

And so like, when I'm the fact that Christmas is next Week is crazy to me because it was literally just New Year's Eve. This is crazy.

[Francesca]

So times.

[Asante]

A lot happened this year. A lot.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm flabbergasted.

[Asante]

Right?

[Francesca]

And we'll see, too. Like, when I was looking through the year for this episode, so much has happened that we're gonna touch on, but it's also like, whoa, my God, we got really tired. No, a lot has happened. And before we get started, I do want to also mention that Oregon, Washington and parts of Montana are heavily flooded right now and not receiving any government aid, as we're not surprised. We know by the episodes we've had this year about the cuts that have been made in different offices that are important, crucial. And because of those cuts, a lot of the farmland out here has been completely flooded out.

[Dustin Ross]

Jesus Christ.

[Francesca]

And if you know anything about the PNW and just the west coast, the farmland really does account for a lot that this country uses as resources. So this is just. And it's bad flooding, y'. All. Like, I'm talking about entire towns and.

[Dustin Ross]

Cities just flooded, trying not to go off. But this is what I mean about them dumb motherfuckers in Washington, D.C. right now that are so dumb and goddamn stupid that they're not even thinking things out. Be racist as fuck. We can't even change that. Be that. Right. But at least have some fucking common sense to understand that certain processes, certain offices, certain things are managed and implemented because they're necessary and crucial, just like you said, and important. Why would you fuck with anything that will fuck with the motherfucking natural resources that keep these wheels turning? Everything has been fucked up, and they don't even. They don't care.

[Asante]

Nope.

[Francesca]

Not to mention the constant recalls. Oh, you're not seeing everything you buy. They're like the broccoli from Trader Joe's.

[Dustin Ross]

Did you see the measles number, Shrimp?

[Francesca]

I did see the measles number in. In South Carolina, I believe. Right.

[Dustin Ross]

There were less than. Than previous years, less than 100 cases. And that's me being generous this year. Thousands and thousands and thousands. And they had them up next to a picture of RFK's inside out, looking ass right next to it. They playing with shit that's affecting people's lives and things that we have been done with, had solutions for that were working.

[Francesca]

Right. Why are you going back repealing that surveillance programs?

[Dustin Ross]

I mean, it's three states. I don't even want to go too far off on this. There were three states. Forgive me, because I can't even remember the list of them where they've literally passed laws that change the age of consent and age for children to be married to 14.

[Francesca]

Jesus Christ.

[Dustin Ross]

And change the law where if a person commits sexual assault of a minor like that and they're under 18 or at least still in high school, attending high school, they can be 18, but if they're attending high school, it's not prosecuted as it's prosecuted as a misdemeanor.

[Francesca]

Wow.

[Dustin Ross]

Which changes the age that with them, sex crimes and shit. That changes the age that you can marry someone. Okay, don't even get me started. It's a lot of weird fucked up shit going on in these hick ass towns and states with these people. People who have nothing better to do than try to figure out a way to be vile and evil and low down. Okay. I don't even want to go too deep, but I have fucking had it. I've had it flooding farmlands and it's.

[Francesca]

Not doing nothing about it. Look at the videos of waters reaching like the top of houses and barns.

[Dustin Ross]

Do you realize what that means?

[Francesca]

Wiped out. I mean, it's bad out here and there's no assistance.

[Dustin Ross]

That's the part that shit takes 50 fucking years for shit to get back to. Quote, unquote normal for motherfuckers to be found.

[Francesca]

Right, Right.

[Dustin Ross]

People's lives are changed forever because of shit like that. That's not nothing to fucking play with. No, because of your political shit.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

You that fucked up.

[Francesca]

Yep. And I was trying to understand what they were, you know, saying was the cause, you know, for that, that level of flooding. Right now. It's a little hard. I'm not a scientist, but they were saying something about atmospheric rivers and it has to do with the warming. Right. So what would normally be certain levels of coal that would keep things as needed have now turned that into flooding and water. And you know, even their levees are being destroyed because of the unexpected amount of water. I've never heard of atmospheric rivers.

[Dustin Ross]

So that, you know why? Because the EPA shit that we had, you know what I'm saying, in place. They've uprooted. That's why. So there's people that's not even looking at environmental elements like that to monitor.

[Francesca]

To monitor things programs. Yeah. That's the problem with the cuts that have been. That's the real world created shortcuts. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

The real world impact looks like that. That's why it was there in the first goddamn place, man. I swear, I hate them motherfuckers on everything I love, man, it's inhumane.

[Francesca]

Yeah, it's pretty bad.

[Dustin Ross]

That ain't got shit to do with politics, you know what I'm saying? That's just keeping people alive. Human shit like.

[Francesca]

But I wanted to use our platform, obviously.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Francesca]

People were unaware because we don't have a government that's speaking on it or doing anything about it especially. You know, my heart goes out to those of us that live in those areas. You know, just seeing the damage and people really asking for help and asking for resources and assistance. I will post as many links as I can find in our description box. And that's another thing. When I was looking through the episodes for this year, the amount of resources we had to constantly be seeing.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you to you both for providing.

[Francesca]

Those, you know, and having. And having to do that because it's. It's really been just like a we got us ass year because don't seem like anyone else does.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm glad we got this show to.

[Francesca]

Be able to be able to do that.

[Asante]

Absolutely.

[Dustin Ross]

Damn, that's fucked up. And then last point, think about the laborers, the people that work the farmlands that already was scared to go to work because of how they ride down on niggas. Now the lands are destroyed. What are those people doing to survive? How they survive and how they eat, man. And that was a whole other thing.

[Francesca]

In Oregon where different, different like I guess they would be. City council members and commissioners from different areas have been complaining that a lot of their farmland and a lot of their companies are unable to run because of the fear mongering of ice. And they've been like begging the government to do something about it to stop them from coming out here. A lot of people have been taken in and arrested and jumped on the street that are citizens or have their green cards literally for no reason. And then they take them first, hurt them, put them somewhere that no one knows and then they release them after when they realize they were wrong. If they.

[Dustin Ross]

Now you got.

[Francesca]

They don't always do that around with.

[Dustin Ross]

Ptsd, you know what I'm saying? Think about the long term effect, the after effects of all of this chaos.

[Francesca]

Of course. And that's the point, right?

[Dustin Ross]

Lying fucking lion ass racist bastards talking about they trying to get the bad people out. But you going to take people from work and from their fucking court immigration hearings and shit. They snatching my fucking out of the courts outside of jobs.

[Francesca]

And they're out of pre kindergartens and kindergartens and outside elementary.

[Dustin Ross]

That means these people were, were sitting, were functioning members of our Society and communities that were not causing problems. These are not bad people. Like y' all are framing these quote unquote illegals to be right so up and racist. Man, like that is dark and up. Yeah, that's horrible, man. It's crazy out here, burning in hell. I'm telling you right now.

[Francesca]

I don't even know if they're of this world. World sometimes. Also want to send my condolences to the students at Brown University that had a mass shooter who still hasn't been found.

[Dustin Ross]

That Cash Patel's lion ass said that they had a suspect. And once again they had the wrong damn guy. What's this, his fourth time doing that shit?

[Francesca]

Not only that, but you know, the campuses have cameras everywhere, so this is very suspicious. Suddenly they're not releasing any footage. They release like one or two little grainy ass videos of someone dressed in black walking past the street, which, who knows, you know what I mean? Like two people have. Two students have died. I think as of now it's like eight or nine that are in critical condition or, you know, have been injured. It's just insane to me. They're in the movie finals.

[Dustin Ross]

Did you see the video of the students who were hiding in the library? Hiding. And then the officers came in yelling at the hands.

[Francesca]

Yelling. Yelling at them. Which. Come on now. I understand it was a high pressure situation, but that doesn't help any.

[Dustin Ross]

They're not the shooters. So why are you speaking to them and handling them in that way when they literally need to be handled with care in this situation? Them kids at school, this is all crazy. But they won't do nothing about any type of gun control laws or nothing. They refuse to even enact anything. But you got Nicki Minaj going on the fucking to the un, talking about Christians in Nigeria being killed, but nobody wants to do anything about gun control laws here in America. This is a lot, man.

[Francesca]

Which even with us discussing, you know, guns last week, um, I still am blown that it was that easy to get one. You know what I mean? Like that. Something about that. My mind was kind of like, what the fuck? This is serious. I just had to get a little background check and I could go pick it up the next day. Just that easy. Wow. Yeah, it's scary.

[Dustin Ross]

Jesus, that is scary.

[Francesca]

That's very scary to me. But anyway, prayers to everything, everybody and everywhere.

[Dustin Ross]

Help us.

[Asante]

Oh.

[Dustin Ross]

Come on, sing it.

[Francesca]

Oh, we gotta laugh to not cry.

[Dustin Ross]

Real shit.

[Francesca]

Do you all have any announcement or anything you'd like our listeners to know before we jump in? Jump in.

[Asante]

Yes. As this is our last episode of the year recording this will be for our Patreon members. If you're listening, this Wednesday, December 17th. Tonight we are going live for the last time for 2025.

[Francesca]

Oh man.

[Asante]

Patreon.com the Friendzone Podcast 8pm Eastern Standard Time. Lachat, we can't wait to see you and talk to you and have fun with you one more time.

[Dustin Ross]

Hey, gonna be. Come on and celebrate. Oh, yeah.

[Francesca]

We ready to take some naps?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, we are. Shout out to everybody. I'll be in Detroit Friday. This Friday at the comedy bar. Hometown. Going around my hometown. Don't make me start. I'm getting on my Adele. Okay. Because the fat lady, you got a.

[Francesca]

Song in your heart today.

[Asante]

Okay.

[Dustin Ross]

You heard him shout out to that evil, vile buoy ass Kimberell. Anyway. Oh, the comedy bar. You can go to dustinrosslive.com the show is Friday, December 19th. It's going to be a good time. It's a hometown show and I'm about to show my ass. So Detroit, pull up. It's a few tickets left. Come see your boy [e-mail] and as.

[Francesca]

Always, that link is in the description box of every episode. So don't.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Francesca]

Don't, don't say it was hard to find. Let's jump into the black business of the week. So I wanted to highlight our good friend, Antoinette has a podcast.

[Asante]

Yes, Antoinette.

[Francesca]

Yes, she has a podcast. Y' all know that's our sister, our baby sister. We love her so much.

[Dustin Ross]

Love you, Antoinette.

[Francesca]

She has another podcast by the name of can't afford therapy, which I absolutely love. It's a great relatable content. Complete, right? Relatable content. It's hosted by Antoinette, Josh and Savon. The way they describe it, right. Shout out to them. They say whether you can afford therapy or not, these conversations will make you question how well you know yourself and are in touch with your mental health. They dive into conversations about mindfulness, compassion, healing and much, much more. Just to show you some of the topics they've covered. They have conversations about childhood wounds, of course, because how could you have therapy without discussing childhood wounds?

[Asante]

Okay.

[Francesca]

They discussed doom scrolling, the cost of mixing friends and business and also the conversation about navigating addiction. So they go into it. It's a show that I'm so happy they're back because for a second there, they weren't sure they were going to come back.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

And the funny thing is, yeah, they decided to stop the show and then they won Webbies And I think that's when they were like, wait, you know.

[Dustin Ross]

Hold on now, hold on, hold on now.

[Francesca]

And they're an independent show, which, you know, for them to win a webby is amazing. So I think that kind of sparked something in them, like maybe we do have something and we should keep going. So I'm happy that they're back. Once again, that's the Can't Afford Therapy podcast. And you can find them wherever you find your favorite podcast. Shout out to them contribution. Absolutely. You know, I love a mental health and wellness based show.

[Dustin Ross]

Antoinette has a me. She has many talents because she literally is singing jazz stuff, standards, me concurrently while hosting this podcast. So don't play with her.

[Francesca]

Okay? We love you, sis. You're amazing. Let's jump into the recap segment. Last week's episode titled Chicken and popsicle sticks. Thank you, Dustin Ross. It was a shoot the shit episode. No hot button, no segments, just whatever we wanted to say. And a lot of you had a lot to say. Also, shout out to the listener that. That reminded me that that spot used to be called Uptown Veg. I'm like, yes, that's exactly it. I love y'. All. And y' all be knowing because it was very Hole in the Wall. It was by the train. You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

You know?

[Francesca]

You know what I'm saying? So that kind of warms my heart that you knew and you said it was good as hell, that you thought it was real meat and kind of had to go to the desk and ask.

[Dustin Ross]

Probably had to go to the bathroom. Turn that up.

[Francesca]

Who stood out to you in the comments?

[Asante]

A lot of people stood out as we talked about a lot of different random things last week because it was a shoot the shit. I just wanna shout out TJ because this is so funny. TJ says I still have the iPhone 12 too. Ever since that lawsuit.

[Francesca]

Come on, TJ.

[Dustin Ross]

Look.

[Asante]

Ever since that lawsuit, these iPhones lasting longer. And I ain't mad at it. It's it. There is something about a specific set of like Apple devices, you know, from the, like the phones to the computers. Like, there's always like a set that just be lasting a little bit longer than like a different generation. Like sometimes it's the one before or after, but there's like different sets, you know what I'm saying? So it's like, I don't know if certain technology is more reliable at times, but you got you a good one. So I ain't mad either. And TJ not either. I also want to shout out to Latoya Shareese. Latoya says, as someone who lived, I.

[Dustin Ross]

Like her already just based on her name, Latoya Charisse.

[Asante]

I mean, look, as someone who licks the plate after a great meal, I always listen to the end of my favorite podcast and on normal speed. And she had used the microphone emoji because, remember, I said to use that if you made it to a certain part. So a lot of. I seen a lot of microphone emojis and she real. Yes, because you remember I made the announcement, you know, we was talking about, you know, your show at the end, and I said, leave the microphone emoji if you heard that part. And they did. Speaking of Giovanna Slaughter says, put double microphone and said, we love you, Dustin. Keep pursuing your comedy show dreams.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you. Thank you. I love you too.

[Asante]

Oh, and Antoine Ray says, dustin, I have the Oakley version of that jacket. You remember, you were looking for that jacket. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

So, yeah, somebody came through with a little link too. So shout out to y'. All.

[Francesca]

Oh, come on.

[Dustin Ross]

You know what I'm saying?

[Asante]

Yes. That's it out here. What did you find out there in the streets, Fran?

[Francesca]

So Shel and the gated community said, fran. She also left four microphones. Asante, that's for you. She said, fran, I want to say I'm so sorry that you had to experience that crazy situation, but I'm definitely glad you handled it the way you did. As a mother of a son who lost his life defending his girlfriend because a rapper called her out her name in a club, I appreciate how you always consider the bigger picture when it comes to your partner. You guys are always dropping knowledge, even on the shoot the shit episodes. I love you guys so much. Oh, and Dustin, my first episode outing after my son passed was to see you at the Chicago City Winery. My son's friends, right. My son's friends got together and got me and my girlfriend tickets. It was what I needed. Thank you, friendzone, right?

[Dustin Ross]

We love you. We love you so much.

[Francesca]

We love you, Shell sen. Our condolences and prayers to you and your son. And I was happy to see her share that because that's exactly why I have to consider all bases in those moments. I press a pause button. You know what I'm saying? Because I'm like, in this moment, I'm heated in this moment. It's scary. But let me think beyond that, which is what I think most people have a hard time doing. You know, that's why we get ourselves in a bunch of. So I'M so sorry that that happened to your son.

[Dustin Ross]

God bless you, Shell. Much love to you. For real, right?

[Francesca]

Absolutely. Vernique said, I'm Jamaican and made a really good friend through the process of us cooking together. She's also Jamaican but didn't know how to make a lot of dishes and I love to cook. So we started family dinner Sundays and cooked together and invited friends over. Now we learned a lot of lessons, like some shit takes forever. So early prep helps, but at the end of the day, the kids running around, friends cooking in the kitchen, laughing and creating community has been so beautiful, especially during a time where a lot of us don't attend early church anymore. I love that visual. You know, obviously that's inspired by Dustin's, but Dustin sharing about cooking thanks for Thanksgiving and having his friends over and us kind of trying to hold on to the recipes of our parents and grandparents and families. And I just think it's so important. I think it's beautiful. I definitely want to get to that point where I feel comfortable enough cooking meals for like a large amount of people. That would be so cool. I've always wanted to be that person for my friends, you know, but my friends are all like serious chefs, so it's a lot of pressure.

[Dustin Ross]

No friend, she got them people.

[Francesca]

It's a lot of pressure.

[Dustin Ross]

She got her friend farting me Jamaican.

[Francesca]

Food girl, hit me up. I want to learn how y' all do the oxtail, but Sasha or Sashay said friend. Next time drive to the police station and not home. Motherfuckers is crazy out here. I didn't know I was being followed. That's the difference. If I knew, I absolutely would not have driven home. That's the last place that I would.

[Dustin Ross]

Have wanted that voluntarily gone.

[Francesca]

Yeah, yeah. So I get that. Thank you for the tip. But that was not the situation at all. I didn't realize until I got out of the car and heard someone yelling at me that I had been followed. Lastly, McColl's friend. I totally get it because I had a grown man waiting outside my house in the dark last December. I have a Great Dane that is not even a little bit scary looking and I'm a short woman, so we do look like a lick. But I went on Amazon that day and got a big ass machete to start taking on our walks. How Caribbean of you. Because there's a certain population of men, she writes white, that either lack the self awareness to notice their behavior is inappropriate or they don't care. Either way it's around and find Out. This is reminding me to reorder my cameras.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, absolutely. Use that machete and turn them into saltfish. Or you know how you get a whole branzino and they slice it like this. It's got them things in it. And they put the excavation all over. Yeah, I'll tell you, that bitch. That's right.

[Francesca]

We added the ring. Has these floodlights. Then when you walk past them, it literally just floods the whole block. Like, it's so ridiculous. But it's. It's good. And it's funny because it's also very sensitive. So anything. The cat, the neighborhood cats, they'd be.

[Dustin Ross]

Mad as, you know, they out there.

[Francesca]

Like, yeah, we've been laughing because they'll walk up to the driveway and then you just see their face into the camera like all that.

[Dustin Ross]

Ears up.

[Francesca]

Like, I'm just trying to get some leftover chicken from the grill. You do all that.

[Dustin Ross]

That one kid Rose gonna come back if you got the lights on.

[Francesca]

Oh, God. That really has been the laugh that I have needed this weekend. Cats are so funny. I need to send y' all, like, a montage.

[Dustin Ross]

God damn.

[Asante]

And I know how much you love.

[Dustin Ross]

So much fun. I told you, watch it. And she was paying attention. She was paying attention on My Mama Jay will tell you herself.

[Francesca]

Did you say that was her Roots?

[Dustin Ross]

It was Roots, Yeah. I said she was watching Roots. Yeah.

[Francesca]

Oh, my God. All right, last one. Last one. For real. Marissa said, I'm glad you reconsidered your gun stance because these folks are crazy out here. I'm from Texas. Enough said. So I've always been okay with guns. And I keep something hot on me. I've got two 9 millimeter pistols, a tan Glock 19, a green tactical Beretta. Good luck as you go down that path. I'm sure that is jarring. To go from not liking them at all to needing to learn about them and carry one. It is jarring. I'm not.

[Dustin Ross]

Don't fuck with her.

[Francesca]

But I'm understanding that this is just where we're at. And it's better to know than not to know.

[Dustin Ross]

That's what I'm on a Leo say, putting you down, Putting you out. Putting you down. Lay you down. Okay with the chopped chopper style.

[Francesca]

I love how many women, though, of our listeners were writing in telling me what their guns are. I don't know why. Something about that was like, wow, y' all are so.

[Dustin Ross]

That's women's lib right there.

[Francesca]

And my favorite part was because women are going to tell you the Color, right? I got this green tan Glock, and it's just.

[Dustin Ross]

It has to the appeal. You know what I'm saying? Women do it right, so they do it right.

[Francesca]

I asked the guy, I was like, y' all don't have, like, earth tones.

[Dustin Ross]

What he do? He did you like this?

[Francesca]

He was like, I can get back to you on that.

[Asante]

No. You want skims for your gun, girl?

[Francesca]

You know what I'm saying? Just some.

[Dustin Ross]

Some browns, a bass collab, bass X, Smith and Wesson.

[Francesca]

What about you, Dustin Ross? What'd you find in those Twitter streets?

[Dustin Ross]

Shout out to the Twitter account Sub X News. Sub X News is a Twitter handle, but it's really about the Tick Tock or who they highlighted. There's a TikTok account titled that girl is bomb. Literally, just like it sounds. That girl is bomb. And she documented her experience going on a hot tub boat in Chicago in the middle of the winter. These two black girls, they got on the boat on a hot tub. It's like a literal hot tub boat. She was saying how it's freezing outside, but she didn't feel no pain. And she said, you can drink on the boat. And she was saying I was, like, such a cool experience. So you can go to her TikTok account. They have the boat company's information and all that if you're in the Chicago area. But it looked really, really cool, fun, and super dope. Like, they was able to bring drinks on.

[Francesca]

Oh, it was cool. God.

[Dustin Ross]

So go on Tick Tock. Go to that girl is bomb on Tick Tock. And you'll see her video has a sticker on it that says, would you try a hot tub boat during a Chicago winner? So you'll see.

[Francesca]

Would y' all do it, like, for.

[Dustin Ross]

Those who can see?

[Francesca]

Oh, wow. That actually looks really cute. It reminds me of when Maya and I were in Iceland. Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

Lagoon.

[Francesca]

That same vibe.

[Dustin Ross]

I mean, the pictures are so cute. You know, I'd have been getting saucy, but she was saying all she needed was just a hat. She said, as long as you have a hat, you good. She was like, you're not cold at all. And I was like, wow. They was waving at passerby and, like, when they was going to the bridges and hey, y', all, the people was like, oh, my God.

[Francesca]

That'S so cool.

[Dustin Ross]

So you gotta see it. It was cool.

[Asante]

Me and Mandy did that. Well, we didn't do the boat, but in salt. Like, we did the hot tub, and there was, like, the heated pool, like, and it was cold. As outside. So like fresh falling snow.

[Francesca]

It's. It's weird. It's very. Yeah, it's a cool concept.

[Asante]

Yeah, it is a mind because you would think that you would just instantly be too damn cold. But it's like, okay, I'm nice and warm and I got my rope on, so it's like, well, you don't.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank God is pneumonia weather, you know. So.

[Francesca]

Yeah, that's awesome. Definitely love seeing to the young. The young girls online that just travel. Nothing. Nothing makes me happier. I love that for y'. All. I'm like, what else? Yeah. So that means that we are done with the intro. Let's jump into this week's episode.

[Dustin Ross]

Welcome to the Friends.

[Francesca]

Managing your finances takes time. Canceling old subscriptions, tracking expenses, and sticking to a budget. Luckily, though, Rocket Money does the heavy lifting for you and automatically finds you ways to save and simplify the process. You get a ton less stress, more free time, which we all need these days, and a clear path towards financial freedom all in one app. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions. It helps monitor your spending and most importantly, helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Their dashboard lays out your total financial picture, including bill due dates and paydays, in a way that's easy to digest. And you can even automatically create custom budgets based on your past spending. If you've got a goal you'd like to save for, Rocket Money can analyze your accounts to find the best time each month to put extra money aside. And Rocket Money has saved users over $2.5 billion, including over $880 million in canceled subscriptions alone. That's probably just in my house. Their 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com Zone today. That's RocketMoney.com Zone.

[Asante]

With ThreatLocker Zero Trust Protection, you can stop breaches before they happen. The result? No stress about the latest malware or zero day attacks because with ThreatLocker you block them by default. Gain more control over your environment with ThreatLocker Zero Trust protection.

[Francesca]

So I mentioned that I am interested in getting a cozy little couch for my personal home office and I want to do that. Honestly, it's insane. Inspired by the situation, which is our book club on our Patreon, we've been reading so much, we're reading rabbits. As my best friend Claude likes to call it Shout out to Book Talk. And he inspired me. He's created this library with a nook in his house and it looks so good and cozy, and I can see how that would inspire you to want to read more. So I want to kind of create my own version and get a cute couch. And I was, you know, scouring the Internet trying to find one. It was kind of hard. There's a lot to choose from. But when you go on Wayfair, everyone knows Wayfair has their couches organized so well. You can do it by color, you can do it by size, by ratings, reviews, any which way you'd like to set it up. And because the holidays are here, you can actually get what you need fast with Wayfair. From bedding and linens to decor for every room in the house, Wayfair is your one stop shop, which we love. There's something for every style and every home, no matter what your space or budget is looking like. And Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your home goals and gift lists with endless inspiration for every space and budget. Fast and easy delivery, even on the big stuff, so you can get what you need when you need it. So I've definitely been looking through Wayfair and I think I found one. I love the reviews too. They're actually really helpful because people don't play when it comes to the details. They'll tell you about the back of the couch, the bottom of the couch, the arms, whether it's soft, whether it's not. And I love how the Wayfarer customers make sure and leave you very detailed reviews that are extremely helpful when picking a couch. So if you're looking for some last minute hosting essentials, some gifts for your loved ones or decor, like I am to celebrate the holidays for way less, head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's Wayfair.com W A Y F A I R.com Wayfair Every style, every home So y' all know that at the end of every year, we've made it a ritual, a habit to do a wrap up of the year where we look at the conversations that we contributed to the podcasting landscape. I think it's important as a creative to do a rewind for yourself because sometimes we can be hard on ourselves or think we didn't do enough or whatever it is. And this isn't even just for creatives. Right. This is for people in general. I think it's important to kind of do an audience. Yeah. And that way you can set a goal for next year. Maybe you want to do more, maybe you want to do less, but you won't know unless you take some time to actually reflect on what you've done. This is one of my favorite episodes.

[Dustin Ross]

See how fucked who's fucked up and not. You know what? I ain't with you next year.

[Francesca]

You know what? That is important. This is a great time to set some boundaries for yourself. I know. I did it. So we the friend zone. I'm so proud that we have done 49 episodes in 2025. Isn't that impressive?

[Asante]

Yes.

[Francesca]

Even with us taking that mid year break. We had episodes. What was that?

[Asante]

You know what? I'm glad you asked for it, because I do. I was one of those.

[Dustin Ross]

That's what people be doing when they celebrate on the news, on streaming, in shows and stuff. They shake ass.

[Francesca]

You did it like that cartoon from.

[Asante]

Bob's burgers.

[Francesca]

We did 49 episodes, which I think is highly impressive. Even when we did our mid year break in July, we put episodes from Patreon as teasers so you guys can get a taste of what we're doing there. So all in all, it will be 49 episodes at the end of this month. I'm so excited.

[Dustin Ross]

That's incredible.

[Francesca]

Wonderful work. Shout out to us. We reached 97 countries according to Spotify, which is like, what, bitch?

[Dustin Ross]

I'm worldwide.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

I mean. And it just continues to increase every year. Our top five countries are United States, United Kingdom, Canada, South Africa and France.

[Asante]

Yes. Yes.

[Francesca]

Come on. Apparently we received more commas than 99 of shows. We also were considered one of the most shared shows of 2025, receiving more shares than 99 of other shows. We also had a 506% increase from last year, which I'm like, what?

[Asante]

Hey, y', all, that's crazy.

[Francesca]

I don't even know what that means. I want to see the numbers. Like, what does that mean exactly? Because that is so inspiring that we're 10 years in and still have all this increase.

[Asante]

You know what I mean? We love that.

[Francesca]

We do. We're very grateful for y'. All. I want to take a look back at those 49. Obviously we're not going to go through all 49 episodes, but I want to highlight highlights, some of the conversations that we brought because I think it's important. Also, it was interesting, like I said earlier, to see what was happening throughout the year, you know, that we had to. To touch on or go through and process with each other as a community a lot has happened this year.

[Asante]

Ooh. From start to finish.

[Francesca]

From start. Literally start to finish. Our first episode of the year was titled John Leguizamo. If that ain't the Friend Zone, I.

[Asante]

Don'T know what that. You know, I don't even remember why.

[Francesca]

Or how I'll tell you.

[Asante]

Okay.

[Francesca]

We were talking about Wicked.

[Asante]

Oh my God.

[Francesca]

And for some reason Dustin thought that Jeff Goldblum Bloom. That is how we started the year.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay, There's a connection here. Both of them are extremely talented actors that mean a lot. Both have been several films that I remember. So there's been an overlap of what that was.

[Francesca]

Right? That's what it is. Also that month, it was the January 19th Tik Tok ban, which was a very, very hot topic. And then Trump rescued us, didn't he? Even now when you Google it, it says that. It says that he that think thank. What is it? Thank you to President Trump for saving TikTok for the American people. It literally says that if you Google it. I was like, this is such a scam. We also discussed on that episode because it wasn't shoot the Shit. So we kind of bounced around. But that's also where we start talking about Netflix using AI to adjust the actors mouths. While we were switching languages, Remember some of us started noticing that and really I think that was an introduction to the AI and tech conversations that kind of permeated through the year as a whole.

[Asante]

We started that with Netflix and now we ended the year with Apple. Cause remember, we was talking about the FaceTime. I'm telling you that FaceTime be.

[Francesca]

No, you're absolutely right. There is something to it and it is interesting to see how much we were concerned about AI throughout the year. We also had an episode titled Older Women Having a Good Time. And the funny thing is, apparently this was our most streamed episode of the year, which I find fascinating. It was an episode that was an energy forecast. I get my woohoo on at the top of the year where I like for us to kind of set a tone for what we think the year is going to feel like, or not think, but what we want the year to feel like. We give it a GPS basically so that it knows where we want it to go and then it's good to look back and see if that happened at all. But we also discussed, unfortunately, the wildfires in California. I did see at the description box of that episode. We had a ton of resource links, different orgs that were on the ground helping. A lot of people came together. I will say that to make sure that community, especially Altadena, could have everything that they needed. It was a really heavy start to the year. That's one thing that I saw. It was like, I mean, the year had turned and we were straight into the new administration, which I think set a dark tone. And then the wildfires. Right. So an edgy start to the.

[Asante]

DUSTIN BLOWS RASPBERRY and there was a.

[Francesca]

Lot of political frustration. Right. Dustin, too. And I noticed a lot in the comments, a lot of our listeners. When I was looking through in January, it was very much this feeling of, I'm done. Like, I do what I had to do. I tried my best, I spoke out, I advocated. And I'm tired, You know, this what y' all wanted. We're just gonna have to deal with it. And I'm done talking, I'm done fighting. A lot of people just tired and feeling a bit defeated. I know, Dustin, that's a sentiment that you were sharing at the top of the year of just feeling like you weren't going to give much more of your energy over to the.

[Dustin Ross]

And I definitely did. Yeah, I don't mind. I. I definitely made some changes in my consumption of certain things. A lot of things are unavoidable. And by me liking her. Do you know how the algorithm becomes manipulated or whatever?

[Francesca]

Absolutely.

[Dustin Ross]

So I see a lot of shit all the time, but. And I cuss a lot about it on the show, but I use the show as an outlet for that in my day to day life. I kind of like create a bubble as much as I can, you know what I'm saying? Just to not allow myself to get so upset and worked up. I mean, I've been wound up, you know what I'm saying? And I just trying to keep my pressure down, but yeah, still the same sentiment. Still standing 10 toes down on it. You know what I'm saying? Y', all, this is your fault. If you voted for this. It's just affecting people. I speak for the people who didn't vote for this shit and the people who are affected and impacted by all this evil shit. So still standing on it. Said what I meant, meant what I said. And it's been working to my benefit to avoid a little bit of the bullshit, the political bullshit that we're ended with every day.

[Francesca]

Yeah. And the fact that we're only in year one, so you have to really save insanity.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

Because we got a much longer ride to go. We also had a comment I wanted to highlight from that conversation was Chris B. In the gated community. Remember he's the one that was talking about Elizabeth Warren being a pretend.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Francesca]

That was so good. He was telling us about her presenting a 23andMe DNA test and being 1 256th Cherokee. He said, checking indigenous on applications when it benefited her. And the indigenous community held her ass to the fire for that because claiming to be indigenous is very popular amongst the whites. He even said they sometimes they roll up to native communities with their test results in hand, expecting to be let in.

[Dustin Ross]

Don't you guys remember back in the day when Roseanne Barr drastically changed her physical appearance to look Native American? You don't remember that? Back in the day when she had, like, tanned up and dyed her hair dark? Y' all don't remember that? It was like, a long time. Roseanne. Yep. The north, like, shout out to pop Rose Alexander Rogers And Chris digging C diggy 1. The north remembers. Pepperidge Farm remembers. We remember. God damn it.

[Francesca]

That's crazy.

[Asante]

They should be fine for that, right? You know what I'm saying? How much time are you wasting? You need to pay for this.

[Francesca]

We also had a listener. The timing of this, I thought was interesting considering how we're ending this year talking about guns. Apparently you had brought up guns in that episode of Sante, I think.

[Asante]

Yep. Because I remember.

[Francesca]

Yeah. Looking into. Go ahead, if you want to share on that.

[Asante]

Well, because a person that you and I are acquainted with was suggesting to me that I protect myself in this state that I'm in. And I remember I was like, I need to do some research on this thing.

[Francesca]

Right.

[Asante]

I remember finding out that you can pretty much carry anything you got anywhere you go. And I was like, that is wild out here. And so that. That actually intimidated me. Like, I know, like, if I probably would have gone through the process like you have, I probably would have been like, damn, this. This is like, easy as hell. But I think that that was also kind of scaring me because I think about younger people or people being introduced to that, like, gun culture at a young age and them just normalizing and be like, oh, I want my first gun by 14 or 16 or whatever. Now by 21, they got five to 10 guns for no reason. I was just like, I don't even want to, like, really play this game. So I understand your hesitation, but I'm also proud of you for doing what you needed to do, Frank. Because I couldn't do it. I was like, this is a lot.

[Francesca]

It is. It is a lot. It is a lot. And Lee Works is a listener that was telling us About Dexter Mitchell, who was apparently a black man out of Michigan who is a certified instructor with the US Concealed Carry association. And he's especially interested in helping black people learn about gun safety, use and protection. Lee also told us that he took the class and it was amazing. A world of information. He has great information and tools for other methods of home defense. If you don't want to carry, which I think is interesting. Right. Because I'm like, I heard about this.

[Dustin Ross]

It's called Soul Shoot.

[Francesca]

Now. I do. Lee, if you're still listening to us, because this was at the top of the year, if you're still listening to us, I would love for you to email me because I would love Dexter Mitchell's information. I mean, obviously I can try to Google it as well. That. I think that would be a great episode.

[Asante]

Yeah, me too.

[Francesca]

Just to have someone, especially someone that works with black people specifically and can speak culturally, what our resistance might. You know, where it might be coming from and all of the things that we can feel connected to in that conversation. Yeah. So I'm definitely going to. I already added the. That to my list.

[Dustin Ross]

A great scope.

[Francesca]

No P. So that would be amazing. We also had read Parable during the the Situation. So we were in a. In a. A space. I'd say it was his favorite book of. You know how you do that to me with Color Purple. It was your favorite favorite book of the situation, the one that changed your life. So we got us talking about leaning on community. Leaning on community, skill building. I also noticed that a lot of us, a lot of us were admitting that we started the new year feeling sad. And I know that had a lot to do with the administration. Right? Like, how could you start the new year feeling excited? I hate to say that because no one should have power, but we were dreading it. And it made the turn of the year a little muddy for a lot of us. There were a lot of strong reactions to New Year's. I saw that a lot in the comments. And a lot of people similar to Dustin agree that they were going to cut back on watching the news as to not allow the current administration to disturb our peace too deeply. The last thing from that, TikTok University, remember. And that came up because we were discussing, because of Parable, the need for skill building and community and all these things.

[Dustin Ross]

And you had us buying kits and shit. Doomsday prep.

[Francesca]

Doomsday prepping. You hear me? But TikTok University was a grand opening. And a grand opening.

[Dustin Ross]

Shuddered.

[Francesca]

Apparently black professors had black professors, both.

[Asante]

Of Y' all are on today, and.

[Francesca]

We'Re offering courses for free on TikTok. It was an exciting time. People had their. Their schedule set up, and then a fight started on who started it and who was the first one and what classes teach, and it just went to hell.

[Asante]

Schools now.

[Dustin Ross]

School closing.

[Asante]

Just.

[Francesca]

Just like that. Which made me sad because I thought it was such a brilliant idea. Right. And also lastly, remember, we started the year with the Bourbon street car that had driven through the crowd as well, and someone actually pointed that out in the comments. The fact that we started that way and now we're ending with Brown University. It's like America.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, thanks a lot, because I wasn't even looking at it like that.

[Francesca]

I mean, you want to talk about patterns, it's just a devastating way to start and end.

[Dustin Ross]

Damn.

[Francesca]

My gosh. We also had an episode titled Love youe Family, which I remember comes from the Boosie clip. Right. Well, his song that inspired a child. That inspired you, Dustin. Do you want to talk about that? Because that.

[Dustin Ross]

Sure. So I can't remember the little girl's name, but she's so funny. Her and her family, they often document her antics. She's a funny, smart little girl. Her name is Paris. That's her name. Her name is Paris.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

And so she was saying how she had gotten in trouble at school because she was told. She told a little. Or outside because she fought a little girl that was trying to bother her sister. And so when her mother was trying to tell her, you can't beat everybody up, the little girl was like, boosie said we could. And she was like, what you talking about? And the little girl was like. He said, if somebody play with your sister, beat her ass up. And then they cut to the. To the thing, to the clip from the song, which is called Love your Family by Booy. And he says, if they play with your sister, beat her ass. That's what it says on the song. And that little girl had heard that, and it registered in for her, and that was just fascinating. Fascinating to me.

[Francesca]

So my favorite part is that you also use that because that was the first Bible study episode.

[Dustin Ross]

Holding it down. Holding it down.

[Francesca]

Now remind me how to say this. The sortie of schekum Shechem. There we go. I was like, this spelling had me in a blender. S C H E C H E M. So that was the first Bible study episode. Y' all love the Bible studies. It was cool to see throughout the year, too. How we.

[Dustin Ross]

Because although my church will be balling y' all know that's my third act in life is to, yes, be a mega pastor.

[Francesca]

No, no QR codes.

[Dustin Ross]

Right. No QR codes. We're gonna have a nice church and I'm gonna live well, but I'm also gonna do a lot of good things, you know what I'm saying? That makes understand. So yeah, I love these Bible stories.

[Francesca]

And they love them too. It was nice reading back the comments. We also had a lot of immigrant defense links and justice centers and law associations and the ACLU in the description box. So that was obviously when the ICE and National Guard. Yeah, this at the top of the year was on. All that started ramping up. We started seeing more of a presence, right. The arguments with LA being used as a testing ground with the National Guard being deployed, it just was. I mean we've had a year. It was kind of hard reading back because I'm like, my God, today the.

[Dustin Ross]

Ice, she really bothers me out of everything. We can argue about policy all day, we can argue about taxes, we can argue about, about fiscal matters, but the ICE bothers me on like a soul level. It really, really bothers me. The, the, the terror that ICE is enacting on US citizens, on immigrants, on every body. Ain't nothing good about ICE and the.

[Francesca]

Type of people that they're hiring, the.

[Dustin Ross]

Type of people that they're hiring who have longer criminal hit records than anyone that they're apprehending any of the lives.

[Francesca]

The so called bad guys that they're looking for that are on the force.

[Dustin Ross]

Which is when you have it, when it goes up to the supreme fucking Court. Right, the decision as to whether or not these ICE agents can racially profile people and they say, yes, you've now given them license to straight up do what they're doing, harass anybody that don't look white. That's what they're doing. While while at the same time creating new laws for immigration to accept white people from other countries. That's exactly what they're doing. So that for me, that really bothers me on like a personal level. Something about even during his first term, when they were ripping the kids from the arms of people at the borders and putting them kids in cages. And them kids, I talk about it all the time. When I saw Those little kids 2 and 3 years seared in my brain when I saw them 2 and 3 year old kids representing themselves in court and the fact that the court proceedings were going on, that rocked. That fucked me up. That fucked me up. And that kind of lit a Fire in me. I don't know. It's just wrong. So the ICE shit is really something I'm sensitive about because that just seems.

[Asante]

Like some shit that it's like, unreal and, like, nobody's gonna say anything. Like, y' all are all gonna just move as. This is business as usual. While there are literally children, three year olds.

[Dustin Ross]

It's unspeakable. The things that they're doing is literally watching people terror. That's why motherfuckers are speaking up and getting in the way and doing what they doing. You know what I'm saying?

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Making noise about it. Because there's certain things in life you just don't do.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

And the ICE shit, of all of the things is the ICE shit and the trans shit. Those two issues for me have been like. It's just been really hard for me to watch that shit happen. It's been really hard. And to understand that people think like that and want to do that just from. From a place of hate. That's been really wild for me to accept and understand. It's been hard out of all that shit, man, that ice and the trans shit.

[Francesca]

And I hate to be. Y' all know I'm a conspiracy theorist or whatever people label people who think like that. But also the. The way that we're. Well, they tried to manipulate the media with these shootings, right? Like, remember, it was a trans shooter, suddenly, that shot the children, right? And then the one in Boulder, Colorado, the man that shot at the Jewish people. Suddenly ICE is tweeting, or not the ice. It was actually the White House Twitter, their official Twitter account, saying, we have him in I.C.E. and his wife and five children. They're in I.C.E. custody. They're illegal aliens. You know, it's like they weaponize. And my brain can't help but wonder. Interesting. The timing of these shootings and the way you get to narrate the story and it gets to, like, ramp everyone up based on whatever it is that they're trying to get done right now, all of a sudden, ICE is saving people from a Boulder, Colorado shooting. You know what I mean? Like, I hate that part part because it's sickening to think of how far they're willing to go to get certain agendas passed. Like, to me, they'll go as far as setting up murder. Yeah. Like, it's like. And we know that, and it's weird that we know that, and we're just like, oh, it's just another one of their things, you know, Another one of their schemes when it should be a.

[Dustin Ross]

Full fucking stop for everybody, right? It should be something that's so shocking to our systems that we've had.

[Francesca]

We gotta change this, like, this brown thing. Y' all don't have video. What do you mean? It's a college campus in a major city. It's just all weird. And I hate that feeling because sometimes I feel like, am I crazy? Am I too deep in the rabbit hole that I see this as. As that and no one else does? Like, you're not just crazy.

[Dustin Ross]

These crazy.

[Francesca]

And not only are they deplorable, right?

[Dustin Ross]

Bad. They're literally the bad people, since that's the label we putting on people. Y' all are the bad people. Y' all are the ones that are racist as fuck. Y' all are the ones that are homophobic and misogynistic as fuck, because believe it or not, audience, those two go hand in hand. Y' all are the people who are grossly, grossly negligent to basic human needs. Basic human needs. Y' all don't give a fuck for y' all to be the pro life party. I don't give a fuck if grown people live or die, let alone a fetus. Because how many times have we seen. Shocking, shocking. Republican lawmaker, Republican whatever, has affair with women or whatever or oftentimes, man, and what, Bored with women and they pay for multiple abortions when they've been vocally. You know what I'm saying? Pro life. And. And so blatantly upfront about that shit.

[Francesca]

This and the gay politicians that are passing the anti LGBTQ law, you know, it's just like, what the fuck is happening?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. How could you do it?

[Francesca]

I don't know.

[Dustin Ross]

How could you do that?

[Francesca]

We also had an episode titled Her Neck, Her Back, Her Van. I don't know what the Are you talking.

[Dustin Ross]

That's Kaya.

[Francesca]

But why van? Why this?

[Dustin Ross]

Kaya's in a van, has a van that. Wait, it's a conversion. You know what a conversion van is, friend?

[Asante]

I feel like you react to this.

[Dustin Ross]

Let me tell you what a conversion van is.

[Francesca]

Do you remember Van Life?

[Dustin Ross]

Like, yeah, they get a big van and they have it. Like, they'll get the. Have, like, a table inside or whatever, and it's usually got, like, stripes on the outside. Back in, like, the. The late 90s and early 2000s, that was a thing. You get a conversion van. I'll find a picture and send it to you. But Kaya has a van, and she drives all the way all the time.

[Francesca]

Okay, I didn't remember That I didn't know why we named it that. Now I do. It was a tech talk, which makes it even funnier. Asante was talking to us about. Actually, it was a tech talk. It was like a loose tech talk. We were sharing the struggles of our parents with their phones and having to always help them figure out how to navigate. We actually had a listener by the name of Troy Farai Saenz who let us know. I wanted to highlight this in case we didn't highlight it, that the New York Public Library offers in person technology classes for seniors. I didn't know that. It's through their Tech Connect program. They have in person computer classes. They even do device walkthroughs. And that's not just for the seniors. That's really for anybody that needs the help. And I thought that was really useful because I. The new. The public library in general is such a haven for resources. And I don't think people realize how much they offer. They can do resume rewrites. You can work on your podcast and record there. Like, there's a. A lot that I think people need to start tapping into the library for. If you haven't that you can learn other languages there. I mean, it's endless. You can check on your.

[Dustin Ross]

Most of it is free, too.

[Francesca]

I'd say all of it, really. We also discussed the Grammys because it was February. Right. It seemed like Ray and Dochi were highlights. I kept seeing them standing out in the comments. I know, Asante, you were talking. We were laughing about everything. Having an apple. I think that's when I was having my mental health breakdown about my toothbrush too. Which, you know, I haven't used since.

[Dustin Ross]

Wow.

[Francesca]

I've been using a regular ass toothbrush. Yeah.

[Asante]

Just going back to basics.

[Francesca]

I have to see my dentist soon. So I'm curious. I want to see if he notices and if it's like, something that I can get away with.

[Dustin Ross]

You gonna walk in the office? Hi.

[Francesca]

Yeah. I want to see if he's like, did you change something?

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, you tell me.

[Francesca]

Me? Because you know, a dentist is going to push for you to use an electrical toothbrush. Like they always. It's one of the first things they bring up. So I want to see if he notices that I stopped using it. We also talked about cars being too smart in that episode. Just like having to rely on everything. The cameras. I know YouTube said specifically that you park without the cameras. You just whip that arm back on the seat.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

But me as a baby driver, I'm still very reliant on the camera. So I have been making it a point to also shoot my arm dead ass. Right.

[Asante]

Dustin used the expression driving from scratch on that episode.

[Francesca]

That's so real. And I also complained about not liking how because of the keyless entry, when I would walk towards my car, how it just fully unlocks. I just find this so dangerous. But people in the comments were telling me, me go in your settings, girl. Like, there's only. Yeah, there's a way to adjust that. I still haven't done that. So I'm actually glad that I saw that, because you walk to the car, the click, click. Even when I go to throw something out in the garbage, click, click.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, no, no. Okay.

[Francesca]

We also complained about outsourced customer service and how frustrating it has gotten to try to call anyone for anything, whether it has to do with flights or bank or, you know, clothing item you're trying to return. It's just.

[Dustin Ross]

That's the only time I say, girl. I'd be so frustrated with the female. Female sounding representative. I'll be like, girl, no. What I'm saying is.

[Francesca]

You know what else? We were annoying about those fake empathetic scripts that they do too. They're like, I'm so sorry that you're experiencing this. I hope.

[Asante]

But you know what? You know what? I'm gonna check you both right now. You better appreciate that script because they're not even doing that no more. They not even doing that no more. You will be lucky to get that.

[Francesca]

Really? I still see it when I'm. When I complain on, like, Instacart.

[Asante]

Oh, well, because that's the automated. Because that's automated or typed out message. But if you talking to someone, you'll be lucky to get an I'm sorry. I'm like, okay, well, let me see what I could do for you today.

[Francesca]

So it's just like, girl, I don't care about it. Actually, we got a comment.

[Asante]

Really? Just get it done right and.

[Francesca]

And you literally just hit it on the head because Samaj said y' all were talking about the automated services and the scripts at the beginning. And I laughed out loud because as someone who worked in customer service for a prominent bank, they would penalize us if we didn't say the quote, unquote empathy statements at the beginning of our calls. As I worked, I noticed a pattern, though the calls from white people would immediately go smoother when we started with our empathy statements. On the other hand, black customers did not want to hear that shit. They just wanted us to take action. This is Obvious in this country. But as a young person in their early 20s, this confirmed that business is often white centered. I often would get in trouble because I would immediately go into action mode to fix the issue without saying the empathy statement. But they never penalized me too bad because I also had the highest efficiency and customer satisfaction than anyone on my team. He says. And though white people want to feel catered to, it seems that black people just want their problems fixed.

[Asante]

Solved.

[Francesca]

Yeah, they don't want to hear that shit. And that's really how I feel like don't do all that fluff. I don't care. This is my issue. What are we doing?

[Asante]

So look, so you want you a black ass business that is going to like. I'll be right back.

[Francesca]

But ain't that interesting though that it's white center. That's something that I, I guess I didn't put it, I didn't connect it that way. But thank you so much for hiring.

[Asante]

That adds into like that conversation.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you Jay.

[Asante]

And all that too. Like, you know, is it unprofessional?

[Francesca]

Yeah. If you skip the script just because.

[Asante]

You know who you serving. So it's like.

[Francesca]

Right. And like he said, even though he could have been penalized, but he also had the highest customer satisfaction rate. So I think yeah, it goes back to things being man centered, things being white centered. Even with technology. Just trying to wash your goddamn hands in the bathroom. Everything. Everything is. Is. We also had a conversation which I really enjoyed. This one my woo woo bag assigned meaning where. That's when I had had my car crashed by the drunk driver. And she had really put me in an emotional spiral because y' all know, I was so excited about being a driver, having my first car.

[Dustin Ross]

The car you wanted to get.

[Francesca]

The car I wanted to get. How I customized it and got it built out exactly how I needed. And then this lady comes drunk.

[Dustin Ross]

You could have said it. It's the last show.

[Francesca]

Hell, this lady comes. No, this lady comes drunk and just destroys it. And that's it, you know. And. And then the hell I had to go through for the path for the following month or two with insurance and, and adjusters and all the. And the fact that I had to get a rental, but then they didn't let me keep the rental until the claim was closed. Just things that didn't make sense, you know. And the fact that I then I then got pushed into a completely different interest rate. Right. Because the one I had locked in was during quarantine which was very low. I have very High credit. This is a very different market. They don't give a fuck, you know what I'm saying? And I was so pissed at her. Pissed at her because her decision affected my life in a very drastic way, financially and emotionally. So it inspired me to get into a conversation about assigned meaning, right? Where we talk about challenging. If I. What?

[Dustin Ross]

You've been by there yet?

[Francesca]

She's not there no more.

[Asante]

I'm about to say she. She need to be up out of there by now.

[Francesca]

No. Yeah, she was.

[Dustin Ross]

You need to go by there again and see.

[Francesca]

I mean, it's not far from me. I pass it all the time. She's absolutely not in there. But we talked about the challenging rug pull moments right. Of life and whether or not we assign deeper meaning to them. Like, it was hard for me not to spiral. Like, why would that happen? Why that happened to me? Why my car? Of all the streets she passed drunk, it was specifically mine. In this journey I'm going through with cars and getting comfortable, you know what I'm saying? Like, it was hard for me not to be like, why? Why my specific car? Why my house? Why all these things? And so we had a great conversation about, yeah, if we think that these are random acts or do we think God's trying to tell us something?

[Asante]

No, I hated that that happened to you, but I am glad that you had that gap insurance. I remember that because you didn't even know anything about it. And then you came back and you were like, y', all, I've got Gap insurance.

[Dustin Ross]

I ain't no, I.

[Asante]

That was such a cool moment because it was like, woo. Well, it didn't make it better, but it made it all right. Like almost all right.

[Francesca]

It absolutely did because I didn't have to come out of pocket a dime for her bullshit. And you know, that was also a learning lesson with. Because our listeners, actually the ones that taught me, like, hopefully you had gap insurance. I didn't know what gap insurance was. I realized that regular insurance is not enough somehow, which is fucking crazy. Then you need gap insurance.

[Asante]

You was like, well, how come they ain't tell me about the gap insurance? And he looked at your document like, because I signed it already.

[Francesca]

It was so weird, right? And then, you know, even the things that the adjuster didn't tell me that one of our listeners told me about the, the maintenance that you spent on the car can count towards the adjustment. Like, it just was things that I was learning and I hated feeling like, why didn't the adjuster tell me that you Know what I mean? Like, yeah, it's all just very scammish scheme ish. And I. I feel like as adults sometimes we feel like that in certain industries, right. When it comes to taxes or cars or insurance, you just feel like a fish out of water. You don't know what's happening. You're just kind of, like, rolling with it. I hate that feeling.

[Asante]

Yeah. Especially the automotive industry. Like, I was never a car person anyway, but I know that cars have changed drastically already, too. So it's like you really just don't know what you're getting, what you need service, what service looks like in certain places. So it was a godsend that you signed for that gap insurance. But like you said, people might not even know what that is or have that knowledge to look for. Be like, all right, well, how am I going to cover myself on the back end? All right, I bought insurance.

[Francesca]

Yeah, right. And thinking that, I mean, you would think that's enough, right? Insurance is expensive. I'm paying $2, 300amonth.

[Asante]

And that's. And that's on the level, that's not enough.

[Francesca]

Right. Because some people, God knows what it's. It's. And it's not enough. The fact that that wasn't enough to cover any of the shit is what's crazy to me. And, you know, our listeners were sharing. I know there was a listener, her name is Shady Nay. She shared about a couple. Her neighbor. They were a couple having a domestic dispute, and they set her. Her car on fire. Y' all remember that? And she was like, of all the cars, why didn't you set your own car fire? Like, so me and her were kind of spiraling at the same time of like, why the fuck did this happen to us? It just makes no sense. And that was a good conversation. I think if I remember correctly, we all kind of had differing opinions. Some of us felt there is a meaning to everything. You just gonna might, you know, probably find it on the back end. And then there's more of a nihilistic approach that was share too, where some people feel nothing has meaning. This is all shit that just happens. We assign meaning to try to, like, have some sanity about it and assume that God is, you know, transactional in that way. So a lot of listeners felt God was stretching them, as they said, to have more mental fortitude, patience and capacity. And others felt the lessons may not always be immediate, but some also felt, yeah, whatever you need to tell yourself. Which I find, I guess that's how it is, right? Some people don't believe it.

[Dustin Ross]

Perspective, right?

[Francesca]

But Black Unicorn on SoundCloud did remind me that the way that Community showed up, like, remember I mentioned an elder lent us his pickup truck. The fact that I didn't know I had Gap insurance, how the community at the church was making sure that we were good anymore, you know, place we needed to get to. And I was like, yeah, that was a silver lining. I don't know that that was like that I need my car taken away. But ain't that how it goes?

[Dustin Ross]

But we appreciate it nonetheless.

[Francesca]

Absolutely. We also just. We had an episode titled Embattled Housewife. You can guess Dustin Ross. That was a Hot Topic episode. And I know it came from, from the grandam and her situation with her DUIs, right? We actually had a debate about that because I didn't think it was appropriate for people to be like celebrating, you know, even her coming back, I'm like, I think it's all very weird, the things that we celebrate on tv. And I know Dustin disagreed because you have a different connection with the housewives and how they share their lives and why they share their lives and. And sort of the transparency, I guess, was your position and how that is important. Right. Like that's the point of the show. I don't know if you wanted to say anything, especially now that she's out.

[Dustin Ross]

Free care until it's backwards. Guess what it is. She home. She made her debut back into the public eye with an appearance at Bravo Con, which is the moment of all moments for Bravo talent. And every time that we've seen her speak so far about her situation, she's been speaking from a place of humility, which I thought was okay.

[Francesca]

That's interesting.

[Dustin Ross]

In fact, in the trailer for the second half of the current season of the Real Housewives of Potomac, they show her being released from jail. And we find out that she does a sit down interview with Andy Cohen where she talks about it. And the only thing we hear Karen say is, it's time to talk about my addiction. So she appears to be very humble, you know, out on bail, fresh out of jail, you know what I'm saying? So that's where she at with it. I think she paid her debt to society, served her time, and now she's gonna continue living her life sober. So.

[Francesca]

Yeah, well, prayers to her. The grand dumb. She's definitely a character. Dustin, you also announced your comedy tour last episode.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes, yes, ma'.

[Asante]

Am.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Francesca]

Look at the difference a year makes, right?

[Dustin Ross]

Right.

[Asante]

Still on the damn road and you're.

[Francesca]

Still on the road. And now you're closing out.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, closing out the year.

[Asante]

Y.

[Dustin Ross]

It's been such a affirming experience for me as a. As talent, you know what I'm saying? I. I really thought about what I wanted to do, and I gave it a shot. And I'm proud of myself for that. I'm so grateful and thankful for all the support people that bought tickets and came to. To see me. That means so much to me, and it validated me in a way that I really needed as a. As a. As a. As. As a human being, you know what I'm saying? But then espec. Especially considering the type of work that I do. So I'm just very grateful. The comedy is something that's special for me because it makes me be really appreciative. So that's where I'm at with it. Thankful to be able to do it. I hope everybody have a good time. Time and laugh, you know what I'm saying? And is able to escape the. Around us for that hour, hour and a half that they with me, you know what I'm saying? And I'm just grateful and looking forward to whatever. Whatever is next. Yeah.

[Francesca]

How many stops did you do in total in 2025?

[Dustin Ross]

Like 15, 16, you know what I'm saying? Somewhere up. Somewhere in there.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

And that's like, I think back on because it was just an idea. You were just, like, entertaining it, and then you did 15.

[Dustin Ross]

Thanksgiving. 2024 is when I made the decision to do it. St. Patrick's Day. 2025 is when we started. That was the first shows. We did two shows that night in New York. Grateful to God I was there. He's thankful for y' all both being there. And now we're. The last show is in Detroit this Friday in three days.

[Francesca]

Crazy.

[Dustin Ross]

And the jokes have changed, the routine has changed. It's just such a different experience. I'm way more comfortable, you know what I'm saying? And just. I'm just really thankful to God. It's been such a blessing in my life. Really great.

[Asante]

Amen.

[Francesca]

Shout out to you for taking the chance on yourself, you know?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, you got to sometimes.

[Francesca]

Absolutely.

[Dustin Ross]

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[Francesca]

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[Francesca]

We also had an episode titled Heavy Conversation and this was facilitated by Asante. We discussed Fat Phobia and I know that that was on the legs of the rapper from Philly, right?

[Asante]

Dank to Moss.

[Francesca]

Thank the Moss, right? Excuse me, from Detroit, who was suing Lyft after a driver refused her a ride because he was claiming she was too heavy and would damage his tires. He suggested she order an xl. And obviously this incident sparked discussions on weight discrimination and Asante was inspired by that. I don't know if you want to talk a little bit about that episode and how you navigated it with our listeners.

[Asante]

Yeah, I just wanted to have a light conversation or a heavy conversation rather from a lighthearted perspective about something we'd be Seeing we'd seen happening in media, it was one of those conversations where, you know, people were focusing more so on, you know, what her weight was and not. Not whether or not she pretty much had a case. And so I felt like that was something that we should have brought to the attention and tried to bring it from that perspective. Especially in the Internet where a lot of things get lost in jokes. And even on the show, some things he lost in jokes. But I feel like we did a good job having a very like fair all around conversation about that.

[Francesca]

Yeah. And I saw in the comments, you know, a lot of people were very vulnerable and open about their experiences with even trying to buy jeans in a store. Like how the sizing options just cut off at some point. One of the bigger things we discussed was doctor doctors going to the doctor to get. Get a pain checked out. And they're talking about your weight. Yeah. And everything is your weight if you lose weight. But if you lose weight, you know. And also the tiktoks of kids just casually joking about fatness and over, you know, it's just like such a casual conversation. And not to mention remembering us growing up on tv. The fat kids were always the butt of the joke. They were always the sidekick.

[Asante]

Comedic relief.

[Francesca]

That's exactly what I was looking for, the comedic relief. And we sometimes I'll watch back now and I'll be like, wow, the shit that we got away with. Number one. And number two, we're conditioned by. Right. Because that's kids we got the jokes from. That's where we are programmed, especially our families, how they made light of weight and how they bring up weight. Right.

[Asante]

Yep.

[Francesca]

I know I've mentioned especially coming from a Caribbean household, they'll say you're weight before they say hi sometimes, you know, and. And commentary on your body and just how that can contribute. Unwarrantied, unsolicited, like so that was from.

[Dustin Ross]

A fat at that usually.

[Francesca]

So that you fat what you do.

[Dustin Ross]

What that's.

[Francesca]

You know what I'm saying about the conversation. But if you're interested in that, I think that was one of the best episodes of the year. It was very vulnerable. I love when we get in that space. So definitely look into that. We had an episode. We didn't have too many guests this year. We only had Jaden XD and Dr. Lauren, which was Dustin's cousin. We'll get to that in a second. But we had an episode called Stacked Like Jenga where Jade and XD of the Jaden XD podcast stopped by and we were discussing just like, the woes of adulting. And that was inspired because XD had shared that his uncle, who had been chronically ill, had decided to end his life. And how that was, first of all, quite the decision, but also how it was going to impact XD and his mom and those who have been, you know, their uncle's caretaker. And having to be a part of that decision. And just the things that as kids, we just weren't prepared for.

[Asante]

The new adults.

[Francesca]

The new adults. And I shared how when my grandma died, as kids, when people would die, right. You just hear about it and then you go to the funeral. There was a gap there on how much you were a part of the process. For most of us, obviously, that's not everybody's story. But now, being the adult, I was there when we had to, like, see the body, call the police. Knowing the steps. What do you do when you find someone that's passed on? Who do you call? What's the process? You just don't know these things. No one is taught these things. Having to, like, go to the funeral home and ask about cremation services.

[Asante]

Right.

[Francesca]

Or setting up, you know, whatever set up. You might have some people do plots and all of the things, how expensive those things are if the person that passed on didn't have the money set aside. You know how that can impact families.

[Asante]

Yep. So many things.

[Francesca]

So many things. Jade spoke on writing the obituary, happened to be the one. Now she's the one that writes the obituaries for her family members that pass. And it's like, no one told us this.

[Dustin Ross]

She can't.

[Francesca]

No one said.

[Asante]

Sorry.

[Dustin Ross]

Standing levity. Sorry.

[Asante]

Is it because there's bitch in the world? No, I'm just kidding.

[Francesca]

No, you didn't. We talked about wills and trust and executor of estates. I mean, just positions that we're just like, what? I'm a kid. I don't know how to do this. I shouldn't have to do this. So that was a really good conversation. We also had an episode by Asante called that Must be a new One where we talked about main character syndrome. I feel like that was inspired, right? Who knows? Remember the influencer who was like, filming himself flushing Saratoga with the. Is it every Saratoga water? That's what it was.

[Asante]

Yeah. Like doing the morning routine, like waking up at 3:30 to do nothing from 3.

[Francesca]

He's, like doing sprints. And that, I think, inspired New Asante, if you want to talk on that.

[Asante]

It inspired a lot of conversations about what he was Doing and, and I just thought he was doing his thing but it inspired people to really just like do that. But I feel like people have been doing that type of thing all of it, like all this time. But yeah, we just talked about main character syndrome and how, you know, we as individuals sometimes see ourselves as the main character based off of the information we've received from tv. Like some of us, if not most of us feel like we've been Issa Rae and insecure at one point in our lives or dating lives and whatnot, like, or one of those characters in those shows. So it's just funny how like we assigned like ourselves roles of like we're the main person and for some nothing else matters or everyone else is like, you know, sub actors or supporting roles in our lives. But yeah, that specific video or like TikTok and Trend, I thought that that was funny that it was part of the conversation because I wasn't mad at it. Like, I just thought that it was worth adding to the conversation. But a lot of people, not from us in our comments but, but it was just funny that a lot of people were mad at him for wasting however many hours of his life he wanted to during his morning routine. I thought it was, I thought it was hot. I thought it was well placed placement. I thought it was aesthetically pleasing and the videos were only like a minute at most of my time to waste. So I was like, all right, well that was fine. Now if he was actually trying to sell me something or being a dick or like, you know, he was a terrible person outside of that I would have had a different opinion. But I just thought he was doing his thing. And it made me think about how people just be doing their own thing and how we and see that on TV and we thought we was doing anything but we doing our own thing. But it was a great episode overall and I loved it.

[Francesca]

And it also spiraled into a conversation just about like, remember there was another young guy who people were making fun of because he would film himself like in the Target parking lot and then he's like walking through the aisles and people were like, who gives a fuck that this is what you're doing with your day? But he's also making money. So it was like a debate of like if he's making money and he's not hurting it. Anyone who gives a. Just don't watch it. Scroll past it if you think it's corny. But I think that's a debate, right, where people consider that type of content brain rot because it's like you're not teaching anything. You're just, like, filming yourself all day. And that also snowballs into the conversation of the invasive influencer culture. That happens too, where you just trying to do some on the leg press and you're in the back of somebody's gym talk video. You know what I mean? You. I told you guys, the guy walked past on the train and he had the meta glasses or a DGI in your face when you're just trying to buy groceries. It's. It's exhausting. And I do think that there should be some laws or something. Something has to be put into place. Nothing wrong with you wanting to film yourself all day. If that's the content, that's how you're making money. I will never interfere with how people make money. But don't y' all think there should be some consideration? Like, I don't wanna be in the back of everybody's video. And I also think that's a safety issue. What if someone moved to a city, like, hiding from something or someone, and you just told them where they live, where they work out.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

What train they take, how they commute? It's a lack of consideration. I've been guilty of it too. You know, it's something that I am now becoming more mindful because I see how annoying it is, because now it's everywhere. Before, it wasn't as prevalent like you. You'd see maybe one person with a camera, but now you go to a. A yoga class, and there's five or six people with their cameras set up. Right.

[Asante]

Remember that girl in the back seat?

[Dustin Ross]

Remember the girl with the flashes in the back seat? Like.

[Francesca]

Oh, yeah, the little girl.

[Asante]

It's. It's America's fault, though. We didn't put cameras literally into every. Onto every. Every device. Look, you just talking about the glasses, you know, like, we had them on the phones. People be having Apple watch, you know, like, I'm telling you, it's just cameras everywhere. It's too much surveillance. Too much. But a lot of those things are tools that are supposed to. Or not always, but, you know, they're supposed to help you focus in on your perfect content creator life too. Right. Like, all right, I'm gonna go take pictures with my glasses of, you know, this nice restaurant I'm at. I can take your hands free. I could take pictures of my food. Like, we don't need to see every little thing all the time from everybody. Like, some people do stuff and they find their lane, but everyone's free. To play with whatever they want to. Right. But it's just when you're trying to do everything all the time, you want to be in everybody's face. It's exhausting. And you need to have live your own life. Oh, my God. Honestly, that was a good tie in, and I'm mad about it.

[Dustin Ross]

What business do Ashley Darby got singing Roberta flag Killing Me Softly?

[Francesca]

Where?

[Dustin Ross]

In a room full of people, unfortunately in D.C. she had a show. She has shows now. And so she had a show. She was at, like, a piano bar. It was people there. It was, like, seated, and she was singing Killing Me. So. Killing this. How she sounds just like me. Killing Me Softly with his song.

[Francesca]

But don't you admire that level of main character syndrome and delusion?

[Dustin Ross]

No.

[Asante]

Sometimes she crazy.

[Francesca]

I think you get so much farther in life.

[Asante]

You do? Absolutely.

[Francesca]

You do. Because it's like, you can't tell me I can't sing. Watch me sing. Like, I'm gonna do it regardless. It's impressive.

[Asante]

It's interesting.

[Francesca]

We also had an episode called Fantasia. Dustin. I know that.

[Asante]

I wonder how we got here.

[Francesca]

Now. That was inspired by the lines I saw outside of Trader Joe's for those ugly little totes. Hyper consumerism.

[Dustin Ross]

Them dinner men ass toast. They look like dinner men. Remember pastel dinner mints and the.

[Francesca]

The tick tock viral. Like. Like, come with me. I love those videos. Come with me to eat the viral croissant with chocolate filling at the patisserie. You know what I mean? Or come with me to find the viral strawberry ottoman at.

[Asante]

Told me to go to Dunkin Donuts to get the Dubai chocolate shake or whatever. The.

[Francesca]

I was like, what? What? And I'm guilty.

[Asante]

No, look. Well, look, I'm on my phone, so sometimes I'd be like, okay, look, because I'm not gonna actually go. So let me see what the this is.

[Francesca]

They get me with the snacks, I won't lie. But the bags. No, I'm not getting in, tj. But it was interesting to see, you know, how they ended up on ebay and the lines lasted for weeks, and it's just, like, intimidating.

[Dustin Ross]

Are they still a thing? Is that still a thing?

[Asante]

Maybe not that collection, but I'm sure the Trader Joe's bags is, like, the thing still. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

I mean, are they still, like, did they retain their value or are they just.

[Francesca]

I doubt it, because you can just get them. I see them on the wall. You know how they have them hanging on that back wall by the bathroom?

[Dustin Ross]

I think we should collab with Trader Joe's and design some. That would be dope. Trader Joe's, if you listening, the Friend Zone would love to collab because what you got? That ain't it.

[Francesca]

They have some cute ones, though, because I, I'll be over there looking stuff.

[Dustin Ross]

We can work with them. But I, I, we need new ones. They need a new one. It must be a new one.

[Francesca]

But we were trying to understand what is the psychology of that, right?

[Dustin Ross]

Like fad.

[Francesca]

The fads and the constant being sold to and the need to get. I remember there was this ugly beaded bag that's popular at. I think It's. Is it T.J. maxx or Ross? One of those. And the girls are, like, filming themselves looking for the bag. They're, like, going through the aisles. They're like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, you guys, I think I found it. I think I found it. And it's like, it has, like, a fish in the front, you know, it's just like, what's happening? But they'll go crazy over these things. The workers are so tired that they'll, like, answer the phone and say, no, we don't have the bag, and then hang up because they know that's all people are calling that ask. You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Like, the sea life bag. The beaded sea life bag.

[Francesca]

You, you found it.

[Dustin Ross]

Is it this one right here, friend?

[Asante]

Oh, my God.

[Francesca]

Why is it on ebay? You feel me? Like, so we talked about, you know, what is that? Is it the desire to feel exclusive? He's looking at the back because I.

[Dustin Ross]

Didn'T even know this was a day.

[Francesca]

The desire to belong, right? Is it a community thing where we just want to be a part of something?

[Asante]

Probably, right?

[Francesca]

Like, what is the itch that's being scratched by lines together? Remember what was the, what was the water bottle at Target?

[Asante]

Stanley. The Stanley Cups.

[Francesca]

The Stanley Cups. How people were, like, acting like it was Black Friday. They had to put on how many could buy? Which is crazy because I have a Stanley cup and I don't even. It's like, it's just a water bottle.

[Asante]

But it was the special edition Starbucks color Valentine's. They had to limit the amount you could buy. And was still, like, lying be like, all right, just get this extra and I'll pay you for it or whatever.

[Dustin Ross]

Girl get her ass in one of them school fight videos.

[Asante]

I seen a few schools, school fights where them Stanley cups have done damage.

[Dustin Ross]

My girl was going to work with a pink one. She worked, that girl. She was.

[Asante]

Used to be White.

[Francesca]

Or the parents feeling guilty that they couldn't get their kid the Stanley Cup. You know, it reminds me when we were little when you couldn't have Jordans. And like, that was the thing. Like, damn, you know, you wearing Kez.

[Asante]

You don't love me, right?

[Francesca]

Just sad. Really good conversation, though, about the hyper consumerism and just the dopamine hits. We are shot out. I say it all the time.

[Asante]

I remember complaining about having to wait in line to buy my damn PlayStation. Yeah, I did, I did. I waited a full. Look, I waited a full year before I waited in that line. I was thinking like, oh, all right, the line's gonna be dead by now. They got him in the store a year later, the PlayStation 5. There were lines for that bitch at the GameStop for over a year.

[Francesca]

And I was the one that stands up.

[Asante]

Yep, yeah, yep.

[Francesca]

I remember everyone calling and that bitch.

[Asante]

Is standing up right now in that living room. Okay, I waited in line twice for that bitch. Cause the first time I was mad. I was like, I don't wait in line like that for products. That's why we were having that conversation. But I remember thinking to myself, the fact that I waited in line this first time and I got to like number five at the front door, I was like, oh, no, bitch. Somebody played I'm going to get this PlayStation Now. Speaking to that dopamine hit. Because the fact that I was right there and missed pissed me off and made me say I'm going to win. And I did win that. Next time.

[Francesca]

I don't. I'm trying to think if I've ever waited online for something.

[Dustin Ross]

I have.

[Francesca]

What did you wait online for? Only the club.

[Dustin Ross]

Sneakers, Jordan Bread Elevens, which is still the creme de la creme. But yes, I. I did. Yep. Sure did. And I've waited. I don't typically have to wait in line too much. No more. But I'm not above it. I wait in line outside the club.

[Francesca]

It was something you really want? Well, yeah, I think I waited in line for like, you know, museum shit, you know, in New York, like exhibits.

[Asante]

And then, well, there's waiting in line because you have like a thing that you're like about to do. And then there's wedding in line because of the fad. And I think that was more what we were discussing because of that.

[Francesca]

Because. No, but in New York, even like certain exhibits are fads.

[Asante]

Yeah, yeah. Cuz I was gonna. I was literally just about to say, yeah, food is fad. Like Shake Shack.

[Francesca]

Absolutely.

[Asante]

Literally.

[Francesca]

People thought that the Cronut.

[Asante]

The cronut was that. I remember having cronuts because a girl shout out to Tara, you know, Terra, I love her.

[Dustin Ross]

I just saw her.

[Asante]

She used to. Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, I love her.

[Asante]

Tera used to bring cronuts all the time. I was like, girl, you waited in line for this, and she's like, yeah, try one. And then you go, offer.

[Francesca]

Was it good? Was it worth it?

[Asante]

I mean, well, you know what it was. I was.

[Dustin Ross]

I was really about to be like.

[Asante]

It was just a whatever, but it was like a passion fruit, fruit flavored cronut.

[Francesca]

And I was like, okay. And a cronut is a croissant donut, right?

[Asante]

Yes. It's mixed. Yes. So I was actually grateful that she waited in line for that, for me. But then, like, Shake Shack, certain people thought that, you know, the food was good, but certain people were just like.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, they've got a line.

[Asante]

Let's go wait in it. It's like, go to get you something to eat and let the people that really want to eat wait in this line and get their food and go like, Popeyes Chicken sandwiches.

[Francesca]

Oh, my God, the chicken. No, but that was crazy. Remember, conspiracy theorists was like, what they put in this poison in the black community because people were fighting, beating each other's asses because you waited online. And then when you got to the front, it ran out. Remember, people were pissed about that.

[Dustin Ross]

And it's still good.

[Asante]

I just want to say they still doing their thing. Hot ones.

[Francesca]

Oh, I had my first one, and it was one of us bought it for Game of Thrones night at Crystal's house. I don't know who bought it. Somebody came home, was it months, and we were like, oh, how'd you get it?

[Dustin Ross]

I feel like.

[Asante]

I feel like I do remember bringing a bunch of chicken sandwiches somewhere. But that might just be my blacklist.

[Dustin Ross]

I don't know.

[Francesca]

That was my first time seeing it. It was crazy. What a time. And it's still a thing because I see the lines out here, especially after. What's his name? Keith.

[Dustin Ross]

Keith.

[Asante]

Keith Lee.

[Francesca]

Keith. I was gonna say Keith Williams. Keith Lee came, so he popped off a lot of stuff. Spots, like, local spots. I like that.

[Dustin Ross]

All right, that's like Cynthia Bailey, Ariana Grande. Because friend, who is Keith Williams?

[Francesca]

I knew it wasn't right without before saying it. We also had an episode titled Types.

[Asante]

Of P. Types of p. Types of PIA.

[Francesca]

Featuring Dr. Lawrence Seal sarcopado, Dustin Cousins, my cousin.

[Dustin Ross]

I love you, Lauren. Y' all know I don't play by My damn family.

[Francesca]

She was amazing. We discussed the horrific history of racism Right. In the field of dermatology. That was based on a Teen Vogue article. It was retinol, the skincare ingredient with a horrifying history written by Kim Kelly. And it focused on Albert Kligman and his years of abuse on prisoners and poor black men from 1951 to 1974. For those who are unfamiliar, he would do patch tests on prisoners and poor men and with untested creams and toxic chemicals were smeared on their human guinea pigs. Yeah. Faces and arms. They were injected with unknown chemicals and often paid $7, if anything at all. Right. And a lot of men endured years of pain and suffering and suffering at the hands of this revered, highly revered dermatologist who created retinol. And Dustin, if you want to talk about what inspired you to bring Dr.

[Dustin Ross]

Lauren in, I ran across that article about the dirty deeds by this Dr. Kligman, I believe was his last name.

[Francesca]

Yep, Albert Kligman.

[Dustin Ross]

Kligman. Excuse me. And so when I read it, immediately I thought about my cousin Lauren, because she's a dermatologist and she. She's very focused on black skin helping black communities or communities of color in general. Right. So immediately I text her like, cuz, what is this shit? You know what I'm saying? Lauren, don't cuss. I do. So I was like, what is this? Or whatever. And she. I was like, I want you to come on the show and talk about it. And of course, like the pro she is, she did all this research and she was very prepared for. For the conversation. And I was so grateful for her contributing her expertise, you know what I'm saying, to that conversation. And she's coming back her seg, and it's called Doctor's orders. And we'll see y' all in 2026 with that.

[Francesca]

I love that.

[Dustin Ross]

She'll be back.

[Francesca]

She's also horrified to hear of my tanning practices. And I told her, we're all gonna die of something. And mine just happens to be tanning. Dr. Seal Sarcopado. Love you.

[Dustin Ross]

Last episode of the year, we get a siren in the background.

[Francesca]

Oh, yes, nostalgia. We also had an episode titled Blue Ribbon Beauty Queen. We talked AI relationships. Asante, people falling in love with chat GPT and replacing it. Replacing their friendships, their family, their boyfriends and girlfriends getting engaged. And we even. We talked about even, like scammers in North Korea using AI from virtual job interviews in the U.S. i mean, all the ways that a AI has been infiltrating Us as a people. Asante, you want to speak on the relationship? Why you thought we needed to talk about that?

[Asante]

Well, I know how much you guys love talking about technology, so I figured I would discuss a scenario where you guys would definitely not be using technology, but other people would be more susceptible for certain ways, unfortunately, AI and even now, like, bringing up this episode was because this was a thing that was happening. But it's funny, it's even funnier now how it's, like, happening more than expected, right? Like. Like I expected it to happen. Yes. But it's happening way more than I imagine. People are falling in love with the AIs. We actually discussed AI and how it's. There's security measures that needs to be in place because certain schools, you know, students were using AI. Like the. The chat bots were actually given the kids saying sexually suggestive things to children, which was terrible. But.

[Dustin Ross]

I just saw a video yesterday where Grok in some of these Teslas has been asking kids to send them nude photos, and there was no AI news report on it. Yeah.

[Asante]

Well, that's why we had the conversation we had earlier this year, because of things like this continuing to happen and evolving because it just goes from your computer to your cell phone to now your car. So technology is just becoming too widely available in all aspects. Like, I don't need my TV to do everything that my cell phone does and then my car to do that too. Like, these all should be separate. Like, we should keep these things separate. But, you know, the car, like you said, cameras and everything. Cars got cameras too.

[Francesca]

Yeah.

[Asante]

But, yeah, that was an interesting episode. And it was also hearing you guys. It was funny hearing you guys reactions to certain things. Now there are the more serious.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, anytime we talk about AI, I' ma sit here and.

[Asante]

But rightfully so, there should always be some sort of pushback for certain things, especially because, yes, there is a lot of use and helpfulness, but it can also be helping the wrong things, which it has been doing.

[Dustin Ross]

So which way?

[Francesca]

Yeah, and these are still programs about AI Again, they're still programmed by human beings. You know what I mean? Mean? So they're gonna have their agendas, they're gonna have their bias. So it can be very dark very quickly as we're seeing why the is Grok asking kids, you know, it's like, what are. Anyway, we also at the top of that episode, that was the. The Patti LuPone curse out of the year. Dustin Ross. I saw it in the comments.

[Dustin Ross]

Talking about Hell's Kitchen too loud.

[Francesca]

Do you want to remind our listeners why you had the curse. Patti Lupon. Sure. So sure.

[Dustin Ross]

Patti LuPone, Broadway legend, you know what I'm saying? And veteran who typically had been on the correct side of certain social and political issues in history. So I expected more from her ass. She was appearing on red carpets and dismissing, refusing to sign the playbill for the Playhouse Kitchen on Broadway, which features the music of Alisa Keys and tells a very similar story to her upbringing, which won the Tony for best actress by Malia Joy Moon, who was the actress that played the lead in that play. And also Keisha Lewis won for best feature performer in a musical. She played Ms. Liza Jane, who was a piano instructor. And she was the reason why I went to see that play four times.

[Asante]

She.

[Dustin Ross]

Her performance blew me away and moved me to tears, literally. She has a very deep bellowing voice and when she would sing these songs, it just was. It just took me, blew me away. Well, Patti LuPone wouldn't sign that playbill on carpets. And she also was giving interviews on carpets saying that Hell's Kitchen was too loud. This black ass play featuring this black ass music that ain't no louder than no other theater. She was performing in the theater next door. She had complained to the powers that be about the loud noise coming from the theater. And so Audra McDonald had made a video saying that she made a video basically contesting it and very gently reminding Patty that she could still apologize for these things whatever whatever. Patti LuPone called Audra McDonald a in an article that she was published where she was talking about the issue. And so I went off on her Audra McDonald, who literally is Broadway the one of the most Tony awarded actors of all time. So I went the fuck off and I don't regret it. And I actually had put her in my show in several of the cities that I did this year. I talked about her and it's called her Gagamel and shit like that. So yeah, if you see it, you get the joke. You know what I'm saying?

[Francesca]

My God, today we also. Now this one is funny because I only included this because of the title. It was a shoot the shit. But you said saying my husband is crazy because I remember you saying the fact that you.

[Asante]

What do we say that about though? Or what do you say? My husband.

[Francesca]

We were talking about something with marriage and Dustin saying I almost made me piss myself.

[Dustin Ross]

And it was okay, you're so. It was. Stop laying it on so thick with that.

[Francesca]

We also did an episode titled Chickens for kfc, which is hilarious. That's where we vented at that point, middle of the year, we're tired, man.

[Dustin Ross]

We just went off.

[Francesca]

I remember. I love having whooped. Yeah. We vented about this show of an administration and shared some of our theories. That's where I was talking about the Boulder attack in Colorado where a man launched a supposed anti Semitic attack that injured 12 people and ice came to the rescue. It just seemed very convenient. Trump was also. We were learning about Trump using his presidency for golf deals, remember? And cryptocurrency. And cryptocurrency deals that travel. Travel ban he had put in, basically keeping out a lot of black and brown countries. Remember, the president of Chad was like, fuck you. Basically, I'm not buying you a boat to get you to like, if we can't travel to you, then so be it. We have plenty of countries within our own continent that we could travel to. And I. We were really. We love how he was standing on that. You know what I mean? And wish that other countries would do the same. Wish they had have. And then like we said earlier, LA being used as a test case with the National Guard being deployed. So we were just complaining, venting, trying to process how much had happened.

[Dustin Ross]

Spin off show and just really feels good.

[Francesca]

Just digging into a lot of the shit that Trump is doing and, you know, just showing our frustrations with that.

[Dustin Ross]

Gosh, so sick of you. You.

[Francesca]

That was halfway in the change. Right, Right. We also had an episode called Dirty Old Man. It was a part two. This one was yours, Dustin, because you were speaking on Dietrich Haddon calling out gospel. Hayden. Excuse me. Calling out hating. Oh, that's what you say.

[Dustin Ross]

But you can agree with that too. Okay.

[Francesca]

He was calling out Gloria winning a BET Award. Yeah, that's what happened. Being the BET Award and gospel being taken over by non gospel artists that he felt the attention and reverence and awarding should be redirected to those who.

[Dustin Ross]

Deserve his dick pics on the Internet.

[Francesca]

Those who are of the life. A lot of our listeners disagreed with us. They felt like, yeah, we should keep it to our Christian community. Like, that's the point. What? You know what I mean? Like, hello.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, we can agree to this. Disagree.

[Francesca]

Yeah. And that's what I was saying. You disagreed. You felt like that's not what it was.

[Dustin Ross]

That's what it was. He was mad. And the B to argue with me about the Dove Awards. Argue with me about the Stellar Awards. The BET Award for gospel music is not that impactful to your industry for y'. All. For him to be getting in his car and turning on his phone and work. I got to say this. Ain't anybody else gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. Say it. Anytime somebody starts something off with that personally, that's my sign. It's. You know what I'm saying? Typically. But if anybody else gonna say it, I' ma say it especially.

[Asante]

And what happened?

[Francesca]

What happened, Right.

[Dustin Ross]

People have probably forgotten about that episode, to be honest with you, until we brought it up just now. Go ahead, friend. Because he's still hating.

[Francesca]

In that same episode, we also discussed Doja cat and that musty boy.

[Dustin Ross]

Remember showing feed in social. Showing, feeding racial chat rooms.

[Asante]

The fact that that's what he's been reduced to after that interaction.

[Francesca]

And it was awkward, right, because we were debating whether she was being fake and with her fans and mistreating them. Essentially a fan that was just excited to see her or. Which was my point. As women, when men just approach you, sometimes you play nice out of survival. It don't mean that you're being fake. It just means you're trying to get the. Out of that situation. We've all been there and not even just women. People in general have been there, but especially women. And so that was a good debate because we were trying to understand where she was coming from in that situation. We also. Armand Wiggins was doing the diddy coverage. I know we were singing. He was killing it. Blowing up at that time, which is another thing that that was happening. That's what I love is like the chronicling of the year, because so much was happening.

[Dustin Ross]

That put him in a totally different category, though.

[Francesca]

Oh, strategy, absolutely.

[Dustin Ross]

He really did his thing with that.

[Francesca]

Shout out to a lot of hard work, too, because he was there every morning to get the, you know, first seats. Asante. You had a conversation about future proofing. Do you remember that conversation?

[Asante]

No.

[Dustin Ross]

What, nigga?

[Francesca]

What?

[Asante]

We were future proofing.

[Francesca]

Yes. You taught us the concept of future proofing.

[Asante]

Oh, yes. Future proofing, that. Future proofing, Yeah. I remember vaguely about it. I only remembered like we talked about. What did you find there, friend?

[Francesca]

This is ages.

[Asante]

Was that the one we talked about? AI in that one? I know we did.

[Francesca]

Well, I know you talked. We were talking about the concept of how we were using these technologies to set ourselves up in the future. Future proofing. You don't remember anything about it.

[Dustin Ross]

That's okay.

[Francesca]

And we can move on.

[Asante]

You know what, guys? He means, look, you see, I'm not smoking this episode. Look, I don't know if you guys have taken the note, but some changes are gonna be made next year, so.

[Francesca]

And we respect it. Not you pulling out yours, Dustin.

[Asante]

We also did support.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, yeah.

[Francesca]

We also had an episode titled Just the Fartsy. I feel like this had to do with Azalea, right?

[Dustin Ross]

Yep. Oh, not artsy, just fartsy. Yep.

[Francesca]

You also mentioned dark adult because of.

[Dustin Ross]

The Rodney Dark child's belief.

[Asante]

Oh, my gosh.

[Francesca]

This has Ty Kirk, right? Him. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Posting about that. And we didn't realize that Ronnie Jerkins was his age. We didn't realize his age, basically. So that's where the dark adult thing, like, damn, you call him dark adult. He wasn't dark adult. Like, we didn't realize that.

[Francesca]

That was so funny. I randomly say it and bust out laughing. Now. You and Asante shared your Cowboy Carter experiences on that episode. It's a concert that I didn't partake in this year. But it was cool to hear y' all reminisce about unforgettable shows. Y' all went. We're in Toronto, right?

[Dustin Ross]

I went in Atlanta.

[Francesca]

Oh, okay. Okay.

[Dustin Ross]

We went to Renaissance.

[Asante]

We were there the same night. Didn't see each other. We.

[Commercial Voice]

We.

[Asante]

We did it again. We just didn't know.

[Francesca]

That's crazy, though.

[Dustin Ross]

Sunday. And I counted. I counted.

[Asante]

He said I was there on. I'm saying we were both dead.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. But I ain't see you. So I'm just saying I was there. You know what I'm saying? We was there.

[Asante]

We was there.

[Dustin Ross]

We was there. That's better. Yes.

[Asante]

Thank you.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. So. Because we was there. We were.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

And I counted. It was over 40 people that stopped me that loved the Friend Zone that day.

[Francesca]

That's so sweet. I remember that when I went to the Renaissance, a lot of people were a shocked to see me outside.

[Dustin Ross]

And what'd you say to them? Welcome to the Renaissance.

[Francesca]

And they were. And also we were in Vegas, which is another shocker, because when would I be in Vegas in Australia? Oh, yeah. That's exactly why I flew out.

[Dustin Ross]

They were screaming, oh, this? Yeah.

[Asante]

Balloon.

[Francesca]

They were like, titties.

[Asante]

I was just like, that's literally her name. I can't believe you said her. Do you remember. You know what? Shout out to Selena's titties.

[Francesca]

I say what?

[Asante]

Shout out to Selena, Dustin. That's the one I told you she was on. There was another girl and she looked at her and she said, your name's Selena? Well, shit, I'm gonna be Yolanda, bitch. And it was like, oh.

[Francesca]

Oh, hell, no.

[Asante]

Yep. That's what she said to her on the season. It was nasty.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, I love it. Selena. Her name is Selena.

[Asante]

Selena. S Titties.

[Francesca]

S Titties. And I remember screaming that and me being like, what is happening? And this person proceeded to jump up with a titty prosthetic. I don't know.

[Asante]

It was just breastplate.

[Francesca]

Yeah, breastplate with, like, tassels.

[Dustin Ross]

It was latex tits. Latex tits? Yeah. One of them. I seen one of them shout out to drag races. I seen one of them Drag race girls whooping ass. She was fighting a dude in a. In a parking lot. It's one of the black drag race girls. And she was out there.

[Asante]

Damn.

[Dustin Ross]

She was out there tearing it. So shout out to her. I wish I knew her name so I could really give her her price.

[Asante]

Oh, wait, I think I know who you are.

[Dustin Ross]

I told Jade. I was like, jade, do some drag Race. I was like. I was like, do you know who this is? That's what I told her. I did. Jay knew who she was like, what?

[Asante]

Hold on. I think I know who you're talking about, because I've seen this video.

[Dustin Ross]

And she was weird, and I was.

[Asante]

Like, oh, my God.

[Francesca]

Wait, was she in draft?

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. Oh, and because of her fighting stance, the way that she had her legs spread.

[Asante]

She had.

[Dustin Ross]

She was wearing a short dress, so her dress rolled up. When she was standing out there about to fight like this, her legs were spread, so the dress rolled up.

[Francesca]

You gotta include that. Send me the link if y' all find it. Dustin, you read Azalea on that episode. I don't remember what she did because God knows what.

[Asante]

Could she do something every other day?

[Francesca]

That's what I'm saying. At that point. Who knows? It was that month, but probably hating on somebody. Yeah, probably.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

I'm trying to remember what convo she was.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm. I don't remember.

[Asante]

Sorry.

[Dustin Ross]

I blacked it out. It's not that I forgot and I've chosen to remove it from my memory.

[Francesca]

But it's also been a lot with her. Yeah. This is also where I was sharing about trying to be more ethical with my investments, because I think when people speak on investing in companies, they focus on the companies that are going to bring you the biggest returns. But you have to look into what exactly are you supporting with, who runs, right? Who owns it, who owns it, what.

[Dustin Ross]

Are they donating to?

[Francesca]

And I removed myself from Tesla. I removed myself from Palantir, which I had no idea was part of, like, the Gaza surveillance technology and a bunch of other military shit that I was like, oh, my. No, I don't care that the returns were better than everyone else's as far as what I was looking at on my portfolio. Same with Tesla High returns. Yeah. It just didn't feel good. Something that my financial advisor was like, you're gonna be hard to work with.

[Dustin Ross]

Because you taught me that, too.

[Francesca]

A lot of shit is the show.

[Dustin Ross]

We turned down so many ads, and it would be so.

[Francesca]

Oh, my God. And campaigns.

[Dustin Ross]

At times, I might've wouldn't have been like, well, let's do that. But then once you be like, well, actually, boom, boom, boom. I'd be like, you know what? She's right. We should promote that. You know what I'm saying? And we don't. So I'm grateful to you for that.

[Francesca]

And it's hard, you know, we are trying to survive out here financially.

[Dustin Ross]

Cause I would've said yes, honey.

[Asante]

Money.

[Dustin Ross]

I feel like, hey, you want to do it?

[Asante]

All right, let's go.

[Francesca]

That reminds me of the height of my YouTube. Cheskel and I. And I've mentioned this before.

[Dustin Ross]

Getting paid right now. She didn't put the banjo out. They doing this nunca pen session with.

[Francesca]

Her, with her choir. She's so great. We and another YouTuber at the time had been approached by one of the massive hair companies to do a commercial, which is a huge deal at the time. We were, like, popping off of our, you know, natural beauty channels, but they wanted us to dye our hair blonde. And it would have been a lot of money. It would have been a national spot. But we were just like, I'm not dying my hair. Yeah. Like, the timing of that is awful with what we're promoting, you know, it just didn't make sense, and it would have been so lucrative. I remember that was kind of my first, like, misalignment, where I had to really be like, am I about to walk away from this amount of money that I've never seen in my life? And my mom was like, will they let your mom do it?

[Asante]

She said, I volunteered because we ain't.

[Dustin Ross]

Leave that on the table.

[Francesca]

She was like, you can hug me in the commercial. You don't have to do it. And I was like, mom, no. She was like, you different.

[Asante]

Okay, look, could you dye your friends here for.

[Francesca]

You know what I'm saying? And I was proud because that was like. It let me know that I had the capability to say no. And I've been able to do that since. Am I perfect? No, obviously. But for the most part, I would say no to some shit.

[Asante]

Okay.

[Francesca]

And we also talked about being directionally challenged, where I mentioned that I was forgetting where I was parking my car. And Asante taught me that you can drop a pin in that. Is it the Google app?

[Asante]

Yep.

[Francesca]

That will let you know. Google Maps app will let you know exactly where your car is. So grateful for that tip because I just don't know what it is. I don't have that intuitive.

[Dustin Ross]

Tapped your shoulder. He said, ah, girl.

[Francesca]

Yeah. And remember listeners, too, that they're like truck drivers or their parents are truck drivers are giving us a ton of tips.

[Asante]

Here's what you need to do, friend.

[Francesca]

It's helpful. Some of us are struggling out here, and a lot of people wrote in saying, me too, girl, me too. I don't know is when I used to go to Target and I would come out and it's like three, four levels. I would be like.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay, I was.

[Francesca]

I came that way for certain malls because you came in one way. Right. But then you obviously buzzed around the mall. And then when I'm ready to leave, I'm like, Father God.

[Asante]

Or was it the Bilk? Oh, damn.

[Dustin Ross]

It was Dillard. Dillard's.

[Francesca]

You know, I have to, like, pick a shoe. What I do now is I pick a shoe in a specific store. I'll be like, this was the Adidas yellow shoe by the door. This is where you came in. Back to this yellow sneaker, friend. That's what helps.

[Dustin Ross]

A landmark.

[Francesca]

Shout out to everybody. I had fun. That's the episode where we celebrated 10 years of the Friend Zone.

[Dustin Ross]

Tens across the board.

[Francesca]

Can you believe that? It was a trip down memory lane. We asked you guys, actually, what you thought were your favorite moments of the past 10 years. Y' all told us. And shout out to Ty. Ty the Robot, who we have to shout out all the time.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca]

He put together a compilation episode which was really funny. It included the freestyles that the guys loved so much.

[Dustin Ross]

Never getting it again. Boo. Call me in Vogue. Never gonna get it. Never gonna get it.

[Francesca]

It includes snippets of your favorite guest moments, everything from Ari Lennox to our crossover episodes with the Read with Jaden XD and Getting Grown and all of our friends that you guys love so much. Me singing at the top of an episode. It was just a lot of really fun, right? A lot of fun moments. Right. We also had an episode called Don't Be a Bridget. This was another Asante talk where we talked the TikTok story times. A lack of professionalism and AI customer service. So this ties into what we were saying. Earlier. Earlier, where we also discussed the respectability politics, though that do kick in with the idea and concept of professionalism. Right. And where like even the aesthetic aspect of professionalism. Remember how hair. Certain hairstyles weren't allowed because they were deemed unprofessional. So that was a really good conversation. Also just venting our frustrations.

[Asante]

And this is the one that stemmed from the. The thing that happened on TikTok with the creator, her mama.

[Francesca]

Oh, can you remind people? Because I don't even remember that there.

[Asante]

Was a Tick Tock creator named Jasmine. I can't remember her last name, but she. She's one of those girls, she just makes. She. You know how every creator has like a signature, something that they were popular for her specifically was. Right. This Jasmine, because she was not particular for being a drag queen such as Masters. Was so much drag happening this episode. What's going on? This Jasmine, she normally does a tick. A dance on Tick Tock Tock to a remix of tra. Or maybe it's an original. It's a sample of. Or it's a clip of Tracy Chapman's Fast Car. And she always does this dance to it. So that's why I was familiar with her. I can't do it. But she always ends it. She always ends it with like one of those cheer hops, you know, when, like the cheerleader throws her arm up and then like, she kicks real funny. Like, she always ends it with one of those. So it's really cool.

[Dustin Ross]

It's a fast car.

[Asante]

Yes. She. No, no, Dustin. She's like. It's like, I've got a fast car. Like, does this whole thing and then ends it with the K. I'm finding this in Love it. Anyway, she. Because she's been popping on Tik Tok for so long, she was buying her mama couch. Went to the place to buy mama couch. Didn't have the color that she wanted, so her mama ordered it instead. The couch came. The couch was a different color and it was a completely different couch. So then she goes back to the store or she's trying to rectify the situation. The woman at the store was taking it personal and decided to reach out to this creator's mother personally. Like, she texted. I remember after this creator had made a video detailing her experience with trying to, you know, get this situation with this couch rectified. So we were talking about professionalism and how that looks. We were even talking about AI too, how that comes up and how it's replacing things because of certain things. Like this and how AI can also work against you in business and professionalism as well. But that was just such one of those scenarios where it's like, people might be pushed into seeing it's attractive to have AI because of the human factors such as this, where this woman decided to be unprofessional and reach out to this creator's mother. What are you doing?

[Francesca]

Emotion. Did you. Have y' all seen this? What's it called? Solidcore drama on TikTok. So this guy that goes to Solidcore, which he ended up getting canceled, it was a grand opening, grand closing, because people found out he was maga, but he had blown up initially because he was. He used to go to Solidcore. I believe he's in, like, Connecticut. Solid Core is. It's kind of like a Pilates, in my opinion. Obviously, they're not the same, but it's in that vein. And he had gotten to class. It was like a 6am class. And the way they have it set up is you can let yourself in with your. Like, your app. The app, even if no one's there. So he let himself in. He opens it, and no. And nobody was there. Like, the teacher wasn't there. And he was like, what the fuck? Because no one had called him or told him it was canceled. Nothing. And so he just got on the machine and started doing his own class. He, like, turned the lights on, and the teacher ends up coming late. And so basically he busted her by filming that, and she got in trouble, but she was, like, begging him to get to take the video down because he kind of made it go viral that she came late and he was teaching himself. And so it became a whole drama because then her. Her fellow teachers and other people in the class were like, why would you do that to her? Just to get a viral moment. And he's like, I didn't do shit. If she's late, she's. She's fucking late. Like, all I did was film myself. And it became a whole drama about the filming and this, you know, people centering themselves in these services. And people were debating, like, whether he needed to do that to her, if it was that serious. Turned into a whole drama. And Solidcore got involved. Had to put out a statement. So crazy.

[Dustin Ross]

That's their fault. Dumbass policy where you can just walk in. Yeah. What the.

[Francesca]

It also seems unclosed.

[Dustin Ross]

Who got the keys? Everybody know the alarm cone, you know what I'm saying? Like, what is going on here?

[Francesca]

You can just open the door. Which I thought was so interesting. Never seen no. Like that.

[Asante]

But they must ain't never seen Lean on me.

[Dustin Ross]

Chain the doors. That's what y' all need to do.

[Francesca]

Or the Waymo. Did y' all see the guy hiding in the back of the Waymo?

[Asante]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Asante]

No, I did not. Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

The woman was putting her daughter in there. Yeah, it was a. In the back seat. Not even the back seat. He's like in the trunk section.

[Francesca]

In the trunk, hiding.

[Dustin Ross]

It was like a Prius or some like a hatchback basically where you have access to the cargo area from the back seat. He was back there like, no, no, I'm. What did he say he was doing?

[Asante]

He was.

[Francesca]

He said someone put him in there. And she was like, what do you mean who? And he was like the. He was like stuttering. Obviously he's making it up. I don't think he thought she would see him that quickly, but she fucking spotted him. And that just. That's a whole other issue.

[Dustin Ross]

Terrifying. Yeah.

[Francesca]

Could you imagine?

[Asante]

Now I will wait the two to four extra minutes Uber.

[Francesca]

You know what I'm saying? But that's why I think having access to a building is dangerous before workers are even there. Like to me that's all plays into the same strangeness that could take place. You know what I mean? We also had an I got your number hussy episode which was an emergency crime zone episode hosted by Dustin. Because the unknown number, the high school catfish documentary came out on Netflix and we had to talk about it.

[Dustin Ross]

Yep. The rotten ass mother of that daughter who ended up being. Spoiler alert if you haven't seen it was. Yeah. It was a woman who was texting her own daughter. Sexually explicit and very violent threatening texts start up all this in their hometown. And it was disgusting and vile and so we had to talk about it. It was also white mess.

[Francesca]

I still am haunted by that. And it was so haunting that they made it a thing on TikTok where people would film their family and friends when they got got to the part where it was exposed that the mom was the one like that became.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, yeah.

[Francesca]

Especially black people being like.

[Dustin Ross]

So we had to talk about that.

[Francesca]

We did.

[Asante]

Hell yeah. Especially since they were still lying in that documentary about some y'.

[Francesca]

All that was.

[Asante]

They had to be weird that it was just too weird. The whole. With the mom and the daughter.

[Francesca]

Like the daughter wanting to keep the relationship.

[Asante]

Yeah. Cuz she's so emotionally up, up over that. But then the dad being kind of weird too.

[Dustin Ross]

I was like, they bust a mother and she got her arms around the Girl. And she said, crying, oh, my God. We're gonna be okay. You did it.

[Asante]

He was like, you have to leave.

[Dustin Ross]

You've got to get out of here.

[Asante]

You can't stay.

[Dustin Ross]

You need to leave.

[Asante]

Remember we had. This was so random. Remember we said he kind of reminded us of the daddy from the.

[Dustin Ross]

From the other thing with the yellow Corvette. What was. Was it Natalia Grace? Natalia Grace.

[Asante]

Y.

[Francesca]

Which Natalia Grace is on Tik Tok herself. Y' all have y.

[Asante]

So that is her doing the jet to holiday thing.

[Francesca]

Well, I don't know what.

[Asante]

No, somebody said that she was saying it. Somebody said that that was her. You know those videos, like, nothing Pizza Jetu holiday. There was a video of someone saying in the street. And they were like, that's entirely. I feel like the listeners tagged me in this and it was mess.

[Francesca]

This is Liz. Can y' all stop tagging me to her account? She gonna look into. Why is everyone tagging a friend a to everything I do, and I don't want her to go back.

[Asante]

You gonna cross fast.

[Francesca]

She gonna connect some.

[Asante]

Keep walking.

[Dustin Ross]

Get a knock at the door, look through the peephole.

[Asante]

Like, I thought somebody was out there. I got some have little pump waiting for you.

[Francesca]

The guy from love after lockup that reached out to me, I was like, why me? Jada next. He talk about your ass every week. He gonna make a post talking about, hey, pretty eyes. Oh, my God.

[Asante]

You used to want the face tattoo that you like so, so much. Oh, no, no, no. Cuz she didn't like. Oh, wait, no, never mind.

[Francesca]

Never. Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

Come on.

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[Dustin Ross]

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[Asante]

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[Francesca]

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[Francesca]

We jumped into spooky season, which is a good time for us. That's our every year. Every year we do our true crime stories or spooky stories that you guys love. Our storytelling. All that spawned from Natalia Grace, ironically.

[Asante]

So this is her damn fault.

[Francesca]

This is her inspiration. This year we did an episode called Three Hots and a God, which is absolutely despicable of us where Asante talked about the Caldwell triple homicide. That was it. Oh, it was. Dustin did the Caldwell triple homicide. Why did I think that was yours? Because I remember he titled it so that was Dustin's Caldwell.

[Dustin Ross]

That was my title.

[Francesca]

Absolutely awful. Dustin.

[Dustin Ross]

Because it was a playoff of three hots and a cot, which is what people say you get in jail.

[Francesca]

Awful. We also did the Multiple Mysteries of Marina Ramos. Right. And then we did apartment 603 which was the case of Ellen Greenberg. Right.

[Dustin Ross]

Literally blood on the kitchen floor.

[Francesca]

And the fact that to this day he got away with it. Insanity. And we also did a briefcase of spaghetti which was a Bible study crime zone mashup that was new for us this year because the Bible be scary. We also did Mouth and Height.

[Dustin Ross]

Shout out to Latoya Jennifer. Have y' all seen them drawings they've been doing to her? Cuz she's so thin and they've been doing drawings. Her legs are like just a thing. She took a side profile picture she was doing like this. So they've been drawing her like that.

[Francesca]

I haven't seen it. Mouth and Height where we discussed pre orders. This was an Asante episode for Neo, the home assistant robot.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Francesca]

Do you want to remind the people about this amazing robot?

[Asante]

One of the first of a few robots coming to market in 2026. It was available for pre order and it's supposed to at some point allegedly be fully autonomous or allegedly is right. Right. It's supposed to become fully autonomous and complete tasks all on its own using AI. As of right now, we've been seeing these demonstrations with people wearing the headsets and we've also seen demonstrations where they have lied saying it's fully autonomous. Someone is using a headset. It not for this particular company but for these robots that are coming to market in general. But yes, we got our first look at some of them and it was.

[Francesca]

Devastation to the nation. The fact that people are doing paying $20,000 for the pre orders and what is it, $500 a month?

[Asante]

I think 499amonth. Or you can get the. Or you could pay 20k to get it outright, but even then you still have to pay some sort of monthly fee. Fee.

[Francesca]

Right. The payment for the man that's running the robot in your house, the customer.

[Asante]

Service, a customer support, which is going to be AI ran too. No.

[Francesca]

But ain't it interesting how this white man can get people to pay this money for something that he hasn't even finalized?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, yeah. White people shout out to deray. Watch whiteness work.

[Francesca]

Truly. We also had an episode called the Midnight Library, one of my favorites, that was based on a book that by Matt Haig that Asante presented to the Lituation, our book club over on Patreon.

[Asante]

Patreon.com friends on podcast. It needs to be a movie.

[Francesca]

It does, right? We discussed. So the book was basically a woman that was hanging in the balance between life and death, and a library presented itself to her where a librarian was able to show her all these books that presented different realities that she could have stepped into based on different decisions. If she had stuck with that swimming that her dad had put her in, she could have been an Olympian, right? If she had stuck with the science classes that she was so interested in, she could have been a glaciologist. And she stepped into all these lives to see what they would feel like, which one felt most like her. And she learned a huge lesson by the end of it on how she actually needs. Needs to appreciate the life that she has, the root life, as we learned in the book. So it made us think about our decisions, right? The different things that we were into, the different things we pivoted into or pivoted out of. And if we were daydreaming of what those lives could have been. I love that episode. I love those concepts, you know, of parallel lives and timelines and dimension hopping is something I've always been interested in. So I love when we get in that bag.

[Dustin Ross]

Great book, Great episode.

[Francesca]

Great book, Great episode. And a lot of you listening were really into it as well and kind of sharing the different decisions you've made, whether it was relocating. We actually had a mom who wrote in saying that because she's been in the military. No, she's been in the military. She's traveled a lot, obviously bounced around a lot to different bases, and it made her wonder how she was affected, affecting her children's timelines and their possible realities. So a lot of interesting being a.

[Dustin Ross]

Good mom, even thinking about like that, right? Most mamas don't give a. I had your black Ass. You know what I'm saying? Hit me like that, you know?

[Francesca]

So that was a really, really great conversation. We also had a pin in Corinne where Dustin walked us through the landmark case. Landmark, you hear me?

[Dustin Ross]

Case Landmark.

[Francesca]

Renee Kennedy in North Carolina, you walked us through it. You know, I saw Brene on Tamron hall, didn't you? I didn't watch.

[Dustin Ross]

It wasn't working.

[Francesca]

But I saw the clip. That's the clip. Tamron hall asked Brene, now that you have to pay this money, do you think this was worth it? Is the love worth it? And she said no immediately. And he just laughed. He's sitting next to her and he just laughed.

[Asante]

I was gonna ask it. So they were all together?

[Francesca]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

She said, no, it's not.

[Francesca]

She takes advantage.

[Dustin Ross]

She goes, no, she. And then everybody is like doing this. And then she's like, but he's worth. It's not worth it. But I think he's worth it, but it's not worth it. Be like, well, what do they mean?

[Francesca]

No sense.

[Dustin Ross]

Just like everything else she said, it don't make no sense. That's how she ended up in that position.

[Asante]

If it is her saying her suing me, it's not worth it. It's like, like worse. She's getting paid. So I. That's okay. Yeah.

[Francesca]

And I saw people were shocked too, cuz Akira, the wife that sued her is now pregnant.

[Dustin Ross]

Someone else might have been too.

[Asante]

Been celebrating.

[Dustin Ross]

She been celebrating.

[Asante]

Look, because I thought she was trying to stay in the situation. Like she's got. Oh, yeah, yes, girl go in here.

[Francesca]

Y. She moved on. I saw people were angry about it. I was like, this is the hard part about sharing your life on the Internet. So much opinion.

[Asante]

Well, because she still.

[Francesca]

Whatever she still wants to.

[Asante]

What does she still have to get divorced or. They weren't married. The.

[Francesca]

I'm assuming they're divorced already.

[Asante]

Oh, well, so. Because did she already have a child with that man? Oh, so can she take some money from him too? Because that was my thing. Friend. When you were saying that, you know, she should have taken it up with his ass, I was like, I want her to get both of them. So she.

[Francesca]

Yeah, I don't know that he has money too, which is probably why she went for.

[Asante]

Well, he's gonna have some from their joint YouTube so she can take both their YouTube checks. Didn't they make like a couple of his YouTube channels?

[Dustin Ross]

She might as well change her name online to garnishment.

[Francesca]

And considering the notoriety that the case has now, they're gonna be Balling if they really do move forward with the couple's channel, you know what I mean? Because everybody wants to know.

[Asante]

So she better get her a piece from both.

[Francesca]

We also did an episode called 10 Years Black. Hey, like we said earlier, we looked back at the last 10 years of black television and film. We talked Insecure, Lovecraft, Country Sinners, Queen and Slim Asante. What made you want to do this? Walk through black memory lane?

[Dustin Ross]

Especially Slim Pipe.

[Francesca]

Yeah, especially.

[Asante]

You know, I've always loved entertainment. I feel like it's such a big part of this show. I feel like we talk about TV all the time and it was a chance for us to get to talk about TV from all different aspects and angles. There's been so much fresh talent over the past 10 years alone. I feel like there was more than enough people to talk about and more than enough movies and instances. Along with Queen and Slim. I wanted to share. I know we did comments at the top of this episode, but I wanted to shout out, Joseph. Joseph has been part of this show forever. And Joseph commented on the 10 Years Black episode.

[Francesca]

Hey, Joseph.

[Dustin Ross]

What's up, Joseph?

[Francesca]

Joseph.

[Asante]

We love you, Joseph. Joseph says so. Some additional 10 and black moments for me are Halle Bailey as Ariel and Little Mermaid, the Wiz Live, the new Edition story, the get down and the film adaptation of the Piano Lesson. So in just such a short span, like, you know, media moves so fast, but I don't feel like we can appreciate all of the things that we can in a moment. So sometimes it's good to go back over, like our show. We've done our show for 10 years. So I feel like over the 10 years that we've been here, we've talked about a lot of media as well on these shows, on this show. So I wanted to revisit some of those moments as well. Insecure was such a big moment, you know, from Dustin being on it to you winning awards for talking about was a big moment for black people. So I wanted to talk about those things. Even us talking about the shows that we had watched for, you know, the binge and the movies we've seen, the fresh talent, you know, the note from Sinners, that actor, him having his debut. There's just so many things happening, you know, from this year alone. Yes. But over the past 10 years that we just need to take into account as we move into the next year or 10 years. Right, right. You know, we talked a lot, a lot about a lot of bad. So I felt like we had to do something good.

[Francesca]

I love that and it was nice to end the year looking back at the good that has happened. I think you need a balance because there's a lot of heaviness, you know, and we need to cover the real, too. I mean, it just is what it is. But I, I, well, they got canceled moment. I'm glad for those moments of, of levity and success and just like some joy up in here. Looking back, those are 40, you know, 48, 49 episodes of power just coming together with these topics. That's what I love about our show. We don't lean on guests, we don't lean on salaciousness. Like, we really come and bring conversation, which I think is really hard to do. 10 years in. That's a lot of conversation. 40 plus episodes per year of conversation. You have to try to bring something different, something fresh, something new, new perspective. I always share, like I already have. I always share this because it's how I stay. It makes my anxiety calm down because, you know, you do want to do the best when you have a show like this, where I already have of my friends on this. For those of you on Patreon, these, this is all the episodes for next year already planned. And it's something that helps me. So as the current year is going, if things are happening, I jot it down, you know, if things that we didn't get a chance to talk about, I jot it down, you know, go back. Yeah, yeah. Especially as humans, you're constantly experiencing. Right. Think of the things that we experienced this year, things that we can bring to the table. So I already have those conversations prepped. I'm excited about them. Yeah, they're good conversations. And then, of course, 2026 is going to bring its own unique energy signature of new things. Hopefully great things to happen.

[Asante]

Hopefully some really, really good things. Okay.

[Francesca]

That we can talk about. But with that, with looking back at the conversations that all of us brought, do you have any episodes or moments that you felt proud of or that you were like, I'm so happy we did this, or they just made you happy throughout the year?

[Dustin Ross]

I do, for sure. And it's types of Pisha, my cousin Lauren coming on the show, being able to grow up with someone and then meet each other as adults in a professional capacity. When you love each other like that, that just was a highlight of all highlights for me. I cannot wait for her to come back. And again, I'm just grateful she shared our time and expertise with us. And I feel like we got some real work done. People took information from that episode and applied it to their real lives, their real processes. And to me, being able to have that sort of impact with our audience is why we do this shit in the first place. So that's my favorite, hands down for the year.

[Francesca]

Absolutely. I love that. Ahsante.

[Asante]

I don't have one specific. I just have a bunch. I'm just proud of myself. All around.

[Dustin Ross]

Around.

[Francesca]

That's important.

[Asante]

I. I feel like we talked about. I talked a lot about tech this year, as I do every year. I try to, like, not talk about it as much, but I feel like this year I really leaned into it anyway because there was so much technology from different formats. We start with chat GPT just being a chat box where people were cheating on tests, to it now being this thing that we have to look out for and make sure that our kids are privy to and like, keep, you know, protecting them from to this technology that we're now introducing to our own homes. So there were a lot of different conversations around technology that I feel like we did a good job of just discussing. That's why I said to you, Dustin, like, you. You want a. Because there needs to be someone that is. There needs to be consumer, right? There needs to be a consumer that is highlighting some of these issues that are coming up from the person, from someone that's apprehensive to use these technologies. So some of these issues can be addressed beforehand. A lot of these things are like, all right, well, the robot's coming out next year. We'll work out the kinks and bugs after, you know, it. And broke. Somebody's Broke somebody's house in half pretty much. Like, like, no. Y' all need to make sure these things are happening before it comes, right? But everything's gonna have this set of bugs. And as you see from Fran, you talking about over. Over consumption. These consumers are gonna buy it just to have it, even if they don't even plan on using it. Even if the thing don't work out half as good as it's advertised too. So all the tech episodes, I'm super proud of those. And you know what? I'm just proud of us. Like, I feel like we've had some really good conversations. Dustin, you were really in your back with the politics. Brand, too, like, you know, we always. We. This is one of those climates where if you can't speak up, do so. And Dustin, I want you to keep speaking up. Like, Brand, you have made us. Thank you. Like, Fran, you have made us a solid resource, you know what I'm saying? Like, these are things that we. We want to provide, like, great things for our community. We want to have good conversations where we inform people, but we also want to provide, like, great context for critical thinking. Yeah, I feel like. I feel like people give you messaging and they're like, this is what you should say. It's like we're having these back and forths. We're listening to each other so we can realize, like, what's missing or what's different and how we can come together. Like friends thinking about doja safety. Like, you know, woman. Of course, woman safety. Some people are gonna be like, okay, well, gay our space. Okay, but human. Hello, kindness. Like, so it's like we all just have to hear each other so we can meet each other. So I love this show. I love y', all, and we've done our damn thing. I love that you should be proud of every one of your episodes, but what are you most proud of?

[Francesca]

No. And I think you hit it on the nail, too. I think a lot of what I'm seeing right with the influencer space and just content creation. I know a lot of people are exhausted of being sold to, and right now, attention. Your attention is such high currency. Everyone is vying for your attention. Whether it's to get you to press play on their podcast, whether it's to get you to buy something on their TikTok shop, whether it's a partnership they need you to watch and leave comments and engagement so they can continue to get partners. It's like we're all fighting for your attention. And although I am a part of that, also fighting for your attention, I just want to be useful, you know, And I think that that's what I feel is going to be a huge turning point for the next coming years of content creation, because people are tired. People are tired of the over consumption, the hyper consumerism, the constant selling. It's just such a different landscape from what it started out as, where I think people genuinely were sharing information and it was like a community thing. Whether you were learning from the makeup girls, how to have technique, learning from the hair girls, some new styles. You were stepping into your natural hair era. You wanted to know what products. You know what I mean? The girl, right? Yeah. The people that were building, showing you, like, you don't need to get a contract. This is how you build your kitchen. I mean, there's something for everybody gardening. And I feel like that's what we need more of because it's getting pushed to the side. And so for me personally, next Year. That's why I'm like, you know what? I would love to bring in the Concealed Carry association member that can talk to us about those of us who are facing this reality. We're going to have Budgenisa to talk to us about the changing climate financially and what we should be doing, what we can be doing. You know what I mean?

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca]

Have a doctor Joy to talk to us about the anxieties that kick up with wanting to be informed but also not looking away. Like, yeah, useful conversations, information. I think we've always done a good job of balancing that. We don't really do a lot of selling on this show. I think a lot of the things that we post is like, our projects that we're working on. You know, obviously we have ads because the show needs to sustain. But for the most part, I think we've done a good job trying to be, you know, useful, informative, funny. You know, I do want to get back into a little more of the mental health aspect. That's something that I, you know, I think it's important, like we've said, to audit yourself. What are things that I think I didn't do enough of this year? Love to get more into some more introspective conversations. Like, I love the assigned meaning conversation when we get into, you know, what we're experiencing as human beings. So a lot more of that. But most importantly, I just wanted to be useful. I want you to walk away from the conversation and feel like, you know, remember when we had someone come in to break down how insurance works? That was so important.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Francesca]

Like right now, insurance is about to close, like in the next month. And people have been emailing me like, yo, I still go back to that, to that clip because she walked us through the different ways to sign up for insurance. And I like, it was so useful. That's some real adult shit. Is it interesting? No, but it's important. You know what I mean?

[Asante]

We can make this to where we about to start quarterly, making like the insurance part of the thing, you know what I'm saying?

[Francesca]

Wills and trust, like, this some real. We're in our late 30s and 40s at this point. Like, this is just where we're at with our content, with our lives. And it's going to continue to adjust and grow. Our audience is growing older as well. Their interests are changing. And so I just want to continue to. To bring information that you're like, yo, I needed that. I needed to know what to sign, what's a deductible? Like, yeah, this is just real life shit. And so we gonna do it more of that next year. We thank you so much for all the laughter. That's important to me too. Right. You wanna be useful, but you also want the belly laughs that make people just, like, get some respite. Oh, don't you drink some relief from the pressures of all this adult shit and all this administration from us. Don't worry about that. And I'm thankful that we can do that, that we can be funny, but we can be introspective, but we can be helpful. And I just want to continue that. We thank you for taking the time out to listen to us for hours every week. We don't take that for granted. You. There's so many shows out now that, like I said, are vying for your attention.

[Asante]

Right.

[Francesca]

Vying for your ears. And the fact that you press play on us every week means we're grateful.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

It really does.

[Francesca]

And we love you. We thank you, thank you for another wonderful year. We're gonna enjoy our break. We hope that you enjoy yours.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca]

And it'll give us time to rest, to reflect, come up with some new ideas to pivot. Guns are blazing for 2026, and let's pray that God cover us, that we all make it to the other side. We'll see you 2026 with fresh cotton. A new year ideas. Yeah. We'll literally see you France getting up off her hammock next year. We'll see that.

[Asante]

Be kind. Happy holidays. Stay black and protect your magic.

[Francesca]

We love you so much. Happy holidays. See you in 2026. Bye. This is.

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