Put Him In A Headlock

Summary

The Friend Zone Podcast – Episode: "Put Him In A Headlock" (March 18, 2026)

Hosts: Dustin Ross, Hey Fran Hey (Francesca), and Asante

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Episode Overview

This episode dives into the impact of public scrutiny and online negativity against Black women in entertainment, centering on Teyana Taylor's polarizing Oscar night. The hosts dissect how viral moments lead to unfair narratives, touch on the intersections of race, joy, and expectations in public spaces, and have extended (hilarious, sometimes heated) discussions about internet culture, technology anxiety, and relationship woes. They also share personal updates, pop culture commentary, and reflections on current media.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. Teyana Taylor at the Oscars: Celebration Interrupted

• [01:23] Dustin (Main Rant):

  • Recap of the Oscars and Teyana Taylor's historic night—nominated for Best Supporting Actress and her film "One Battle After Another" winning Best Picture.
  • Viral “incident": Teyana lightly checks a security guard after being shoved.
  • Internet backlash accuses Teyana of “lacking decorum”; Twitter users nitpick clips of her joyful, playful behavior—especially a playful headlock on her director as they went up to accept Best Picture.
  • Dustin calls out online haters by name, suggesting the vitriol is rooted in jealousy and internalized respectability politics within the Black community.
    • Quote: “Y’all hating on her? Y’all jealous. Teyana Taylor is a Black girl from Harlem that you have seen yourself in… you relate to her.” —Dustin [05:10]
  • The hosts criticize the “crabs in a barrel” mentality and urge listeners to celebrate Black excellence rather than tearing it down.

• [06:50] Dustin & Fran:

  • Discuss media double standards: If a Black male artist did something playful, it’d be seen as camaraderie.
  • Celebrate Teyana’s fashion, visibility, and resilience over critiques of her film’s quality.
  • Quote: “Why wouldn't we speak positively about this moment for her, instead of hating on her showing some joy?” —Dustin [08:29]

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2. Online Negativity and Viral Narratives

• The conversation broadens to the “hater economy” of the internet.
• Examples cited:
  • Tina Knowles’ gumbo booth at the Houston Rodeo and viral, likely fake, “bad customer” stories targeting Beyoncé’s mother.
  • [12:54] Dustin: “People just want the views. They don’t be caring what it’s for or what it’s going to do in the long term. And that’s so sad and unfortunate.”
• Discussion on generational differences: The lost “art” of watching one’s mouth and real-life consequences that used to exist for public disrespect.

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3. Personal Updates & Celebrations

• [30:49-39:48] Asante’s Birthday & New Car:

  • Asante recounts buying a car, rediscovering city vs. highway driving, and grappling with paperwork and adulting.
    • “With my newfound whip and responsibilities, I decided I need to make up for some lost time driving.” —Asante [31:59]
  • Fran and Dustin reminisce on driving culture in Atlanta and New York, and their own vehicle quirks and routines.

• [39:48-42:47]:

  • Anecdote about Fran’s partner being mistaken for a car washer (and the ensuing awkward white guilt).
    • “She comes back in a full out wail crying because apparently her wife like flipped the fuck out.” —Fran [40:48]

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4. Pop Culture Round-Up

• Recap of Nelly Furtado & Missy Elliott’s “remix moment” [14:32].

• Shoutout to Cher’s youthfulness and relationship [17:22], sparking jokes about age-gap relationships.

• [21:20-24:43] Friend Zone Patreon Announcements:

  • New book pick: My Train Leaves at Three by Natalia Guerrero.
  • TV binge: "The Burbs" (Keke Palmer’s series).
  • Upcoming guest: Tiffany "The Budgetnista" Aliche, finance talk, and a call for audience questions.
    • Joke about “paperback Toya” for the episode title.

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5. Reality/Relationship TV: Blue Therapy

• Deep-dive on "Blue Therapy" (UK reality show; couples in therapy).
• Standout storyline:
  • Man pretends to go to a job for months after being fired, while his partner covers 70% of rent and he buys organic food for himself.
    • Quote: “He’d been literally, Dustin, getting dressed, leaving the house, like, pretending he was going to work for months.” –Asante [69:00]
    • “That’s abusive to me. When you start separating food.” –Dustin [73:01]
  • General consensus: some dealbreakers are non-negotiable in relationships.

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6. AI, Chatbots & Technology Paranoia

• Extended conversation on tech anxiety, privacy, and AI’s encroachment [86:31–115:00]:

  • Referenced Death, Sex & Money Podcast— relationships breaking up over ChatGPT use.
  • Cautionary tales:
    • A spouse becomes obsessed after AI “diagnoses” her husband as a cheater.
    • A young woman receives metaphysical messages from ChatGPT; another person is convinced to embark on a “government rescue mission” by AI and later “unalives” himself.
    • The weirdness of “Malt Book” (Reddit for AIs to talk to each other).
    • “Anything that is assimilating itself into multiple areas of your life that you did not ask for should raise a red flag.” —Asante [107:26]
  • Strong advice on digital boundaries and the importance of Black professionals in ethical tech.

• Practical Tech Tips:

  • Be careful with what information is shared into AI tools—social security numbers, financial or personal data.
  • Importance of tech/engineering education, especially for Black youth [108:11].

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7. Privacy, Surveillance, & The Creeping Eye

• [118:21] Discussion of powerful individuals using surveillance:
  • Jeff Bezos’ phone being remotely accessed (even when off) by a foreign prince for blackmail.
  • The hosts joke (nervously) about the possibility of always being watched via devices—a blend of humor and genuine unease.

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8. Closing Thoughts

• Final reflection on the psychological vulnerabilities created by societal stress, poor leadership, and technology.
  • “We just gotta pray for our mental health… I think these are the reasons we’re so susceptible.” —Fran [117:00]
• Importance of community, honest conversation, and personal boundaries as protection in the digital age.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You’d be joyful and here they come talking about you don’t know how to act… Instead of being happy, y’all hating!” –Dustin [05:10]
• “I come from a time where you got your ass whooped in person for shit like that. You had to watch your fucking mouth.” –Dustin [13:14]
• “Good hair days do way more than we usually give them credit for. Even me and I shave my head every day.” –Dustin [26:54]
• “Why are you curious for the next three days? She literally had the chatbots talking to each other and then they just both started clicking and I was like, ‘oh, fuck her for doing that.’” –Asante [124:55]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:23–09:03] Teyana Taylor backlash, Oscars, Black joy & envy
• [12:54–14:21] Hater economy & viral negativity
• [30:49–39:48] Asante’s birthday/car saga; generational driving stories
• [42:47–44:00] “Car washer” story; racial microaggressions, white guilt
• [64:36–84:14] "Blue Therapy" deep-dive: financial lies, relationship dealbreakers
• [86:31–109:23] AI/tech paranoia, ChatGPT horror stories, online boundaries
• [118:21–121:48] Real world surveillance, privacy fears, Jeff Bezos case
• [124:03–126:40] AI bots talking to each other and the “dead internet theory”

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Tone and Style

Candid, humorous, and occasionally exasperated, the trio mix pop culture critique with personal anecdotes and supportive advice, balancing serious moments with signature wit and warmth.

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Takeaways For Listeners

• Celebrate Black joy and excellence—don’t internalize or amplify negative, respectability-based critiques.
• Be cautious about viral “discourse” and the ways social media rewards negativity.
• Digital vigilance is more important than ever: protect privacy, question AI’s role, and encourage future generations to engage with tech ethically.
• Relationship red flags (especially around honesty, control, and finances) are crucial to heed.
• Community conversation and education—in tech, finance, and everything else—builds resilience.

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Next Week’s Preview:
Financial advice special with Tiffany the Budgetnista. Submit questions on socials or via email!

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Transcript

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[Asante]

Let' From Nintendo and Illumination the Super Mario Bros. Can take care of the kingdom.

[Dustin Ross]

Comes a super powered adventure on April 1st.

[Asante]

Pack our things.

[Dustin Ross]

The galaxy gets even bigger. He knows that's my bike, right? Yes, sir. The Super Mario Galaxy Movie Hity PG. Only Peter's April 1st get tickets now. Welcome to the Friends. My name is Dustin.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm Francesca, also known as. Hey friend.

[Asante]

Hey. My name is Asante.

[Dustin Ross]

This is the friend zone. Let's start the show.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'd say I'm surprised, but I know who you are.

[Asante]

You are. Yup. Wow.

[Dustin Ross]

Real simple and straight like that. Now y' all know that this weekend on Sunday, the Oscars, the Academy Awards took place. And a few upsets, a few things that we were very happy about, a few things that we anticipated, you know what I'm saying? A few things shit kind of went how we knew it was gonna go, right? But further to that point, what was so fucking disgraceful to me was the way that everybody started straight up hating on Teyana Taylor. Straight up, just straight up hating. There was an incident, very brief incident between her and a security some the security personnel at the event. She said that the guy had shoved her and she checked him about it and told him he was very rude, you know what I'm saying? Kept it moving. Her voice wasn't even raised and amplified. She was like, you're rude. You're very rude. You're very rude. She was like, he put his hands on me. I'm a female. He doesn't need to do that. Later on when people asked her about it because of course that clip went viral, right? Something so simple really. No, no profanity used, nothing. Just a simple addressing of an issue that took place. These then went online. I'm gonna name names today. We naming names on Today. They don't went online on their Twitters talking shit about Tiana Taylor being this and being that and her not having any decorum, don't know how to act. We gotta keep pull our pants up in the white people's establishment. Basically, all that mattering tweets like this somebody, some lady named Power. Underscore within. Underscore me on Twitter. She tweeted a video of the Best Supporting Actress category being called at the awards, which we know Tiana was nominated for. And when the category was called and the white lady won, I think her name is Amy Madigan or something like that. But anyway, she won. They said she got down in the movie Weapons, so whatever. When she won, Teyana jumped up and was, like, clapping, supporting her, happy for her. You know what I'm saying? Like, this lady named Power within me gonna say. I knew from the first hour something was off. What's off about her clapping for her peers? Right. They're trying to frame it as if she was acting weird in the audience. Then when her film that she was nominated in that Best Supporting Actress category, four, the film, which is called One Battle After Another.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Hate it.

[Dustin Ross]

Right, Right. But the Academy didn't because it actually ended up winning Best Picture. Right? It only won Best Picture. So when they won, Tiana and the director of the film were going up to the stage, and Tiana, who has already shown a very playful banner with him and all the press runs that they did and stuff, she put him in, like, a little headlock like, yo, you won.

[Francesca (Fran)]

She tripped him in the ass.

[Dustin Ross]

So Tiana, you know what I'm saying? Like, so Tiana, some lady named Portia Deshann Gonn. What the f. Going on with Teyana? This is, like, the third video in a row I've seen of her wiling at the Oscars. Uh oh, what's going on with her is the movie that she was in just won Best Picture, which is the biggest award of the fucking night. And she was also nominated for her first Academy Award, which is like the highest honor you can have as a performer and especially in a performance category. The shit that really only happens, like, once in a lifetime. And it happened to her that night. So her energy was good. She was celebratory and jovial. She was having a good time. I don't understand why that's frowned upon. So the couplings of musings like that, in addition to the conversation surrounding the red carpet incident, has resulted in a nasty ass discourse online of people who are trying to say she don't know how to act and you gotta move a certain way when you're in certain spaces. And all of this shit really, y' all hating on her? Y' all jealous? Teyana Taylor is a black girl from Harlem that you have seen yourself in and whose life take the celebrity shit out of it. You relate to her. She's regular to y'. All. And so the fact that she's having these experiences that are otherworldly makes you jealous. And that's why y' all have shifted to a negative dialogue, a negative narrative connected to her name and incidents that happen because you're looking for something to pick at. You're looking for something negative to say on top of the fact that she hurt y' all feelings all award season. Looking that beautiful, right?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Every time, too.

[Dustin Ross]

Looking that beautiful every time you saw her. And it has affected and stoked these flames of jealousy and resentment and inherent, you know, just. Just nastiness that y' all are exhibiting for no fucking reason. Instead of being happy, we talk all the time about how as black people, we have to support each other, be happy for each other. Black boy joy, black girl magic, all of these things. We talk about how we want the opportunity and the space to be joyful. And as soon as a is happy in a. In a once in a lifetime moment, here come a lady named Portia DeSannon and somebody else named Power within talking shit and Power Within. You got gray hair, so you old enough to know better.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You know what?

[Dustin Ross]

You old enough to know.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But a headlock sounds crazy. Is it?

[Dustin Ross]

Is it playful? It was a playful head. Like, you know, been the whole press went friend. She's been.

[Francesca (Fran)]

We also don't know their relationship.

[Asante]

We do.

[Dustin Ross]

We've seen it. You know what I'm saying? That's what I'm saying.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

You know. You know how much I love award season.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So if they could be like that. Because I imagine, like, if Michael B. Jordan had playfully put Ryan Coogler in a headlock, he probably wouldn't have had the same feeling over it would have been. Of course they're friends, but maybe it's him being white and her being a black woman. Who knows what it is?

[Dustin Ross]

And maybe Portia deshann hasn't been keeping up with the press run, but just decided to talk shit sight unseen, you know, about what she saw in Tiana. There's nothing to be negative about. I hate that.

[Asante]

You said she put the director in the headline.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Asante]

Have you seen anything about the movie

[Francesca (Fran)]

putting a headlock for that movie? So that alone, I'm okay with it.

[Asante]

Dustin, have you seen anything?

[Dustin Ross]

No. I was happy that Tiana was nominated. I was happy that she was having a moment where she was visible as an A list actor, an A list entertainer. She was getting the recognition that we fight tooth and nail for our black performers to get. So I personally didn't give a fuck about the movie being ass. You know what I'm saying? Once everybody said it was, I felt no urgency to view it. And I could see you never saw it. Mm. Mm.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, the movie.

[Dustin Ross]

I could instead just focus on what is positive here, which is the fact that this black actress is. Is now my super sweet 16. Is now a position.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

For longevity, sustainability, global recognition. She's getting looks as not just an actor. She also was nominated for a Grammy for her album. She is a fashion darling straight down. Like, why would not. Why wouldn't we speak positively about this moment for her instead of hating on her showing some joy as she's experiencing these moments whether the movie was good or bad. We can go, we can dig it to pieces later. But I'm saying relative to her, why are you hating on her moment.

[Asante]

I understand. And the reason that I asked if you've seen anything about the movie and the reason I asked about, you know, if it was the director that was putting the headlock is because from my limited experience with the movie, it's Teyana Taylor on cast with Leonardo DiCaprio, Benicio del Toro, Sean Penn, Regina Hall. Like, you know, these top up in this bitch, so I don't see. And to all the credits that you just read, starting from Teyana Taylor on super sweet sixteen all the way up to her just killing it on Fashion Week and being this darling who's had all these roles in between. What was the one? A thousand, a thousand and one like, you know what I'm saying? So for her to have gone this far and now she's worked with this director and she's putting this motherfucking headlock because he. She was pregnant in this movie. Dustin with the AK47.

[Dustin Ross]

Come on.

[Asante]

Her and this director are cool. You know, not only did she fulfill her obligation as acting in this movie, but they are at the Oscars together celebrating. So her beautiful Tiana, talented. There's just nothing negative to say about her being there. Putting this director. Nothing negative to say about them in a headlock is so crazy to me. I didn't know that this was happening and I hate that it is happening. And I just need people to just take a step back, especially when you're talking about a product such as Teyana Taylor because it's just like why

[Dustin Ross]

we finally got a new A list black

[Francesca (Fran)]

actress, especially one that we've seen since

[Dustin Ross]

she was a teenage in an industry

[Francesca (Fran)]

where people love to call People, plants. We watch this young girl from every iteration, right? And it's. It is really cool. I mean, I didn't see the clip, though. I want to see the moon.

[Dustin Ross]

We gotta put it in the thing. We'll have Ty shout out to Ty. Thank you, Ty. We have Ty put it in the carousel. But I just can't stand no hating it. If something for you, it ain't for you, but you don't have. They are literally nitpicking. They're finding things and turning random shit into something else through these conversations. And it's so stupid to the point that the Academy okay itself tweeted out, like, hey, we were made aware of an incident that happened with Tiana Taylor, who we love, and the security firm that we hired. There's no. No space for that. We love all that other shit. Yeah. Like, this really is like. But they had to issue that statement because of these motherfucking miscreants online making

[Francesca (Fran)]

it something it wasn't.

[Dustin Ross]

They did the same. They doing the same.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Thing always happens when you are starting to ascend.

[Dustin Ross]

Like, Jasmine Crockett did the same thing to Jasmine Crockett the minute she announced her run for Senate. Boom, here they come. Now. All the shit that y' all say y' all loved about her, now you hate about her, now she's too loud, now she's ghetto, now she's all these things. The minute she decided to run, they doing it. I hate to make it. No, I don't. Cause it tracks. They doing it to Beyonce mama at the gumbo with her gumbo, right? Now they doing it to her gumbo mama. Tina has a gumbo stand at the Houston Rodeo, right, that has been wildly popular. It's the cutest thing in the world. Friends, Turquoise and brown. They have all this branding, and they sell big bowls of gumbo that looks like Styrofoam cups. Basically, people have been making up stories saying Miss Tina was mean to them and nasty and all this shit saying the gumbo is nasty. It tastes like water and piss. And you can tell that they're fake videos. I'm just gonna say she was mean to me. And I. And I don't even want to eat. So I want to throw it on the side here, put the top on it so you can eat it later. You know what I'm saying? Like. Like. And the way that they just going to be purposely negative to Beyonce mama, That's why they doing that, because it's Beyonce.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It's like, it's wrong.

[Dustin Ross]

I've never been Like I'm the one of the biggest. Y' I'll whisper in your ear in a minute if we sit next to each other somewhere. I'm one of the biggest shit talkers on the face of the earth. But I am not looking. And it ain't got nothing to do with me being old now. I wasn't like that when I was younger, in my twenties, in my heyday.

[Asante]

Right.

[Dustin Ross]

I wasn't doing that then. You know what I'm saying? I was not seeking out opportunities to hate on shit and just be nasty and mean spirited. I don't get it. I come from a time where you got your ass whooped in person for shit like that. You had to watch your fucking mouth.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Mouth.

[Dustin Ross]

And I think that now people have. That's a lost art. That's the recipe we got to bring back. Get that black girl off of Instagram again.

[Asante]

What's her name?

[Dustin Ross]

Wicked Confessions or Wicked Kitchen. Whatever her name is. Tell her to talk about that. Teaching people to watch their mouth. What's the recipe for that?

[Asante]

I'm sure she got one.

[Dustin Ross]

I can't take it. And Ms. Tina's gumbo looked good to me. It didn't look like everybody's gumbo. Everybody. Everybody's gumbo looks different to me. I've never seen gumbo look like gumbo. I've just seen it look like that when you eat it. You know what I'm saying? It depends. It's regional. It's all that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right. So that's weird. Everybody wants to go viral too.

[Dustin Ross]

So who wants. And it's so dumb because you're going viral for being a hater.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right? Yeah, but that works.

[Asante]

Yep. People just want the views. They don't be caring what it's for about or what it's going to do in the long term. And that's so sad and unfortunate.

[Dustin Ross]

That's gross as fuck. In your face. That's what Ms. Tina should have did. She should have been spitting that face at that gumbo booth.

[Asante]

Do you guys remember that there was a remix of that with Nelly Furtado.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes. And she performed it on something recently and Missy commented about it. Or. Or I saw the video about what was her tiny desk. Right?

[Asante]

Nelly. Frittados.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Asante]

Or Missy's.

[Dustin Ross]

Nellie's.

[Asante]

Oh.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, Nelly. Nelly Furtado performed it at her. She did the remix on her tiny desk and somebody tweeted about the performance. This was like yesterday. So maybe we saw the same thing. But Missy Elliott responded to it with me right now. Missy Elliott responded to it and she was talking about the fact that that remix is not available on streaming. And she was like, so many of my songs ain't, I'm finding out, ain't available on streaming or whatever. But yes. And Ellie Furcato was singing that song live.

[Asante]

It's funny, I knew that that song wasn't on streaming and I only learned that a few days ago because I was trying to show somebody believe that that happened. And then the only receipt that I had was a video from YouTube where they had performed this remix at a Michael Jackson at his tribute. Like, you know, back when they used

[Dustin Ross]

to do good songs, he probably told him to do it.

[Asante]

I literally was like, I bet Michael loved this. Like, I know he loved Missy. And I bet he was like in love with Nelly Potato being such an interesting artist to break through at that time. Because as I was looking at it, I was like, she was an interesting artist. The fact that she came kind of on the.

[Dustin Ross]

I loved her from the moment I saw it.

[Asante]

I'm like a bird. And randomly later on ends up working with Missy and then Timberland and Lil Wayne and then goes back to her, you know, worldly. I'm just like, you know what?

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Had quite the story arc with her music.

[Dustin Ross]

She has. She sang like a bird. We like singers singing about birds and flapping their arms like wings. Look at Patti LaBelle. We've always loved that. That's what we love about her. So it was reminiscent. It was a hint of Patti LaBelle in that for me that made me feel familiar. So I love Like a Bird when

[Asante]

she was like Luther, he was with us and she.

[Dustin Ross]

The Grammy goes too.

[Asante]

Lord was like, right.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It was Cher in the back apologizing the whole time that had me dying. She was talking to some dude like, I am so sorry. I'm so sorry.

[Dustin Ross]

That's because they even knocking them coins loose her mind. But she been distracted, you know what I'm saying? She didn't want a white. Well a m a n a middle aged, you know what I'm saying? Because how old is he? About in his 30s, right?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm sure. Maybe 40s, I don't know.

[Dustin Ross]

Either way for sure it's a win because she 70s, 80s, I think. 80s.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I mean she looks great, but.

[Asante]

Right.

[Dustin Ross]

She should make some Stanley cups that say steel wet.

[Asante]

79 years old. She turns 80 on May 20th.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Wow. Oh, she's a Taurus.

[Dustin Ross]

I know what they're doing for their birthday.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Wow. Celebrating your girlfriend's 80th birthday is amazing.

[Asante]

In your 30s.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Shout out to that. You know what? I have questions for the both of you. Let me kick them off. Well, before we do that, do you have any announcements, anything you'd like to let our listeners know before we jump in? Jump in.

[Dustin Ross]

I have an announcement. Friends about to ask questions.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Don't cut into our questions.

[Asante]

Well, if you're a Patreon member, don't forget next week is the last Wednesday of the month. That is right.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Damn.

[Asante]

I mean, there's one more week, but you know that Tuesday Wednesday starts on the first. So I ain't know if y' all wanted to. I guess I could have asked y' all before.

[Dustin Ross]

No, if it's a different month, the last Wednesday of the month. Right.

[Asante]

So I just want to make sure we kept it professional. We could have talked about them now. So it's happened. All right, so again, if you are part of Patreon or you don't know what that is, go to patreon.com the Friendzonepodcast. You can find out. But if you are part of the Patreon last Wednesday of the month, that that is the 25th, March 25th, 2026, 8:00pm Eastern Standard Time. We will be having our Wednesday wind down LA Chat. You already know what's up. If you haven't made it out, make it out. Okay. We do it only one time every month. And if you miss it, I make

[Dustin Ross]

out way more than one time every month.

[Asante]

Okay. Make it out.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, no misinformation. That's all.

[Asante]

For more information patreon.com your Friend Zone podcast. For more information on that live that we're having and all the other fun things that we do at the gated community, join us.

[Dustin Ross]

That's it.

[Francesca (Fran)]

We're reading a new book.

[Asante]

Oh, yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Dustin Ross. If you'd like to tell people about

[Dustin Ross]

it, this book is incredible so far. It's called My Train Leaves at three by Natalie Guerrero. Guerrero.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Okay.

[Dustin Ross]

Rosa Mars, Natalie Guerrero.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Dustin Ross]

So the set in New York City. Y' all know we love a New York City story around here because our podcast was born in New York. Our podcast is a New Yorker. And so it is. The book is about a very talented young woman who is close with her family and experiences some family tragedies that kind of knock her off her course so far. And at the point that we stopped last week, she is just seeing a pathway back to getting back to herself professionally. So we're excited to find out what happens next. And we're gonna do that, so you should pick it up. Natasha Guerrero. My train leaves at 3.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And we're also watching the burbs, which Dustin is also a facility

[Dustin Ross]

no matter what. Okay. Against all odds, we drove our car up that mountain and saved the burbs on the binge. But we watching it this week. We're watching episode three. It's still a lot of crazy things going on. The Burbs is a reimagination of the a classic from many decades ago that starred Tom Hanks, but this time it's interpreted as a series starring Keke Palmer and a bunch of other people who are funny. And there's a baby and a dog.

[Francesca (Fran)]

A cute baby. Such a good actor, that baby.

[Dustin Ross]

That baby can dance and everything. How does it know it's the blocking abilities of the baby.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Do like this and the baby be like. It's just. It's fascinating to see. But we're watching that. We're on episode three, so check that out with us too. We'll see you on Patreon.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Come on, hang out with us on Patreon. We're reading books, we're watching tv. We're going live stream. We're live streaming with the chat. And then if you love the audio version but want to see the video version of every week's episode, you can do that on patreon.com the Friendzone podcast.

[Dustin Ross]

So that's level studies, right? We're grateful for the years of audio only podcasting that we did. But once we decided to add the video component, it really elevated the experience for our audience. And I love that because y' all say the show funnier when you can see us. I don't even realize we be doing certain shit, but we really do be doing certain shit. That's funny. So join the Patreon. I say all that to say that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Absolutely. And also the ad free version of the audio is also available. And it ties, right. It'll stream right into your app. App. So it don't. You don't have to feel like you have to add all kinds of apps and. Oh, it's, you know. I know. Podcast rotation. It'll go right into your podcast rotation, which I think is really cool technology. So same. This ain't House of Pain.

[Dustin Ross]

It's a house of Pain. You ain't got to jump around.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right? Okay.

[Dustin Ross]

You can just go straight to your app and it's there.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So I just wanted to put that out for the newer listeners also hear my question. Oh, no, I did want to say this too. Next one week's episode is before I Forget we are having Tiffany. The budget.

[Asante]

You know what good time that is. You know what good time that is.

[Dustin Ross]

They make it when you got the coins.

[Francesca (Fran)]

We love Tiffany. She is always an absolute pleasure and we always walk away from her episodes learning a lot. I mean, she has single handedly shifted a lot of my financial investments and decisions which we, we will always give thanks. And you know, it's a, it's a tricky time right now financially and we're headed into some trickier times financially with everything going on. Right. So this is a perfect time to have Tiffany come on and talk some sense into us. So I always like to have a segment in that episode that is dedicated to your questions.

[Dustin Ross]

Wonderful.

[Francesca (Fran)]

There will be a prompt, prompt asking questions on Twitter. There will be a prompt asking questions on the Patreon and also on our Instagram. But if you are not on any of those platforms, which I understand some of you don't play that, you can email franfeyfranhey.com where I will compile everything. You can also DM any of us if you follow us on the social medias, whatever is easiest for you. Just send the question Dustin is at. Look at Dustin. Asante is betrayed.

[Dustin Ross]

Betrayal. Live and live. Y' all witnessing this now. She just talked about to be called on Instagram witnessing this betrayal. You're witnessing it. Come on. Come on, friend, twist the knife.

[Asante]

Come on.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Don't they have video options too now? So all jokes aside, definitely send your questions in because I want to make sure that she gets a chance to really tap into your concerns because that's really the point of the episode. Right.

[Dustin Ross]

So that's busy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Send them in.

[Dustin Ross]

Tiffany is a star now. She is a star. She be like, y' all know her

[Francesca (Fran)]

on tv, you know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Yes. So the fact that she's making time for us, I'm very appreciative.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. And the paperback of her book is coming out, I believe, either next week or the week after. So it's also just like perfect timing so she can really talk about the book and hopefully you guys will be interested in it and purchase it and we can really help get her where she needs to go. But we love you, Tiffany. We're excited to talk to you. So please send in those questions so that we can have a nice, well rounded conversation next week about our finances.

[Dustin Ross]

Do y' all remember when, before you

[Asante]

moved

[Dustin Ross]

because you said Tiffany's book is coming out in paperback, it immediately like triggered a thought for me. Do you remember when Tamar Braxton was arguing with Toya rushing.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I did not.

[Dustin Ross]

Toya had written a book. Toya had written a book.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Who was Toya Rushing?

[Dustin Ross]

So Lil Wayne's. Reginae's mom.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, okay. Okay. Got you.

[Dustin Ross]

And you know, she's a multiple. She's an author. Multiple titles. Author.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Nice.

[Dustin Ross]

And so she had written a book. And when her and Tamar were arguing, Tamar went online and called her paperback toy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What?

[Asante]

Now that name does you r paperback

[Dustin Ross]

to you, don't you?

[Asante]

I don't think I knew the origin.

[Dustin Ross]

So as soon as you said paper mix on and paperback, I was like,

[Francesca (Fran)]

we name the episode paperback. She'd be a good sport. She would of course promote my.

[Asante]

But that's because she coming on trying to help the people get their paper back. It's a whole different paperback.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Sounds good.

[Dustin Ross]

Because you do.

[Asante]

You just brought that down. I'm just saying it was a different thing when you flipped it when you said that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That was good. That was good. But yes, definitely send those questions in. We love to have them now.

[Dustin Ross]

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[Francesca (Fran)]

Birthday boy. Happy birthday. Asante.

[Asante]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh my God. Say it's your birthday.

[Asante]

It's your birthday.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It was your birthday on Sunday.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

How was it we know that you're a secret squirrel, but anything that you would like to share with the hear.

[Asante]

It was a really good time.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah, you're smiling. So I believe

[Asante]

was a really, really good time. Absolutely. It was a good time. I have celebrated horizontal polka. First of all, let me say right before I turned my very big age and going into it and now that I'm here, I did a lot of things over the past couple of weeks. I was renewing my identification. You know, I had got my driver's license and so I was feeling squirrely and I decided to, you know, just do it. And I went down to the car lot and just got me a car.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yes. And it's cute as hell.

[Asante]

Thank you both.

[Dustin Ross]

Picture me rolling.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I love that.

[Asante]

Okay, thank you both. With my. With my newfound whip. Whip and responsibilities, I decided I need to make up for some lost time driving. So I had, you know, hit the road a little bit. You know, short little trip here and there. So Fran, you hit the road and

[Francesca (Fran)]

Jack, you road trip. Like I'm talking about like snacks in the whole nine.

[Asante]

Fran, let me tell you to. To go from driving for the first time, like for real, for real and forever just to get my license, then test driving a car, being the second time I drove in that matter that mattered. Then the fourth time, me just getting on the road for a long ass trip.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Shout out to you.

[Asante]

Insane. It was insane.

[Dustin Ross]

It was not insane.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Did you have a car when you lived in Atlanta before you moved to New York?

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Okay, so this is a story like having a car car.

[Asante]

So let me give you my carfax, right?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Asante]

I legally started driving at the age of 15, maybe 14. I just know I had a permit super early. And then I got my license very shortly after that. I think I got it at 50. I think I got everything in 15. And then I turned 16. And I remember driving a new car. And then till 21, I was a driver. When I moved to New York City, like maybe between 22, 23, I wasn't really driving as much because I wasn't going out to, you know, driving. Drive at the cars at home or rental cars or wherever else. I was just a city boy riding the train, not worried about whipping nothing. Even when we was traveling, you know, shout out to Crystal, always, you know, picking up the rental, like never needed to whip.

[Dustin Ross]

So now you know what I just thought about Dustin.

[Asante]

I know exactly what you thought about Dustin. And I had that moment myself because it came on, on my shuffle friend.

[Dustin Ross]

You know what? I just Thought about too, don't you?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I don't.

[Asante]

She doesn't. And I'm.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No, no, no.

[Dustin Ross]

Go ahead, Kat. I'm not gonna say that. Just go.

[Asante]

I'm going to throw it in there. I'm going to throw it in there because this was. It was such a crazy moment for me to have gone so long without driving. To me doing all that, leaving the lie in my new whip, being like, I feel like I need to go somewhere. I need to do something. P.S. you know, city driving is completely different from highway driving. Most people, they start off and get their footy, their footing, city driving. But I remember always being a great highway driver in Atlanta, in the Atlanta streets.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So amazing because Atlanta was.

[Dustin Ross]

Was.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I remember driving in Atlanta.

[Asante]

Formula, formula. Look, everything about Atlanta, look. 85, 75, 285, 285, 20.

[Dustin Ross]

Craziness. I might keep riding in the circle.

[Asante]

If you get lost in 25, you're going to make it right back to me.

[Dustin Ross]

Just keep the faith.

[Asante]

Yeah. So to go from all of that to like me getting this car, I was like, I need to go on a trip. So I took a long night drive. It was like two in the morning and got on the highway, went one way for. For a long ass time.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's so cool.

[Asante]

Just getting reacquainted with the lanes, getting acquainted with my new wit, you know, had my phone on shuffle. I also realized that I am not used to being on the phone while on the. In the car. I remember having a cell phone when I was driving and I guess I was comfortable when I was younger. I need. That's a muscle. I don't have no more because I was very anxious to just look at my phone for anything. So I was like, all right, well, at least I know my limits and I'm not trying to push them. Like, I doing real good at like checking my systems internally and being in control the whole time. It was a little scary at times. Like just I was staying in the same lane. But you know, when you drive for a long time, sometimes you kind of feel like you might be slipping even though you're not. But luckily I wasn't like leaving my lane because of the new technology. The lights were letting me know when I was. I had the beeps.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I mean, there's so much I didn't have beeps.

[Asante]

Thank God I wasn't doing nothing crazy enough to where I needed to beep. Okay, well, but I learned and the new features and vehicles are crazy. Like the parking brake is electric now. You just Press a button for it instead of pushing the thing or pulling the thing. I'm just. I'm impressed. There's so many new cool things that happen in cars or with cars now. I am a car owner.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So happy for you. Yeah.

[Asante]

Thank you. Thank you. Even buying a car is its own experience. For those of you buying cars. Do your research. Do your research. People just say, do your research, but do your research. What that consists of is, is what you're looking for in a car. And do your research before you get to a lot. Do your research before you get to any lot. And what the terms are. And do your research after you leave a lot. I have been all up and through this contract, looking through everything that I paid for, seeing what I can or need to return because I had bought a bunch of them protection plans. I was like, I'm returning this shit.

[Dustin Ross]

Like, I was just, I was just

[Asante]

telling the man yes, because I'm like, you're not gonna. Like, you're not gonna lock me into some bullshit. But the only thing that I hate that I did was because I didn't think about certain other things. But I might leave parts of that for Tif Case. She got some information on that. Because, you know, when it comes to like financing and refinancing, all those things, I had ideas in my head about refinancing, but I wasn't thinking about some of those things with that original ticket. But it's all still gonna work out because I was like, damn. Like I really came in this kind of wanting to buy the car, like knowing what car I wanted and just saying it. I'm gonna get this car and got it on the spot. And I didn't spend more than I wanted to. Cuz I remember what I knew I wanted my number to be, what I thought it could go up to. And what I was gonna say, hell, the no to, to. And we didn't even get close to that. Nice. I was. And, and what it was, especially with these interest rates, friend, the interest rates are crazy. But also the car that I was looking for initially, I was looking for in a particular year. Because, you know, certain cars, the car game is crazy. Certain cars, because they've been around for so long, they're known to be more reliable. So when you buy a newer car, it's a little bit riskier per se, like, or a newer model. So if you find a reliable car, even if you buy a newer model of that car, it could have its own set of issues. So I was thinking about initially getting an Older car, but once that older car was priced at the same for a used one with a different set of rules to it, whatever those rules may be for anybody, because everybody.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm picking up different things.

[Asante]

You know, certain people are looking for mileage. Certain people are looking for, you know, just price. Certain people just need a car to get to A to B, just to do whatever to trade later.

[Dustin Ross]

I want something sexy.

[Asante]

So many games. So many games. It's an interesting world. I feel like a real adult now that I'm in, now that I have skin in this game, and I'm proud.

[Dustin Ross]

Man, that's some grown man.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So cool.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Asante]

It's. I will say it's not the best time to have purchased a car. And I know that, you know, there's a lot going on in the world right now, but with that, this is a skill that I feel is necessary or may be necessary.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And honestly, having a car you can drive away somewhere if you need to is probably the. The best.

[Asante]

My own means of escape. If she goes sideways, I can't order

[Dustin Ross]

Uber, then that's probably a survival kit.

[Asante]

Yes. This is an investment in my survival kit. I was like, you know what? I'm not gonna drive around that much, really. Anyway, so if I don't use this

[Dustin Ross]

car that I drive to the mailbox, I drive everywhere.

[Asante]

No Dustin. Now, I said that. Why did I get up early this morning just to go top her off. Like, she wasn't only.

[Dustin Ross]

And I would have went to the

[Asante]

car wash now it's too cold for you.

[Dustin Ross]

Every day, you think about that every day.

[Asante]

But I'm gonna give me a detailing package, and they just gonna have to do that. For real?

[Francesca (Fran)]

For real.

[Dustin Ross]

My brother goes to the car wash every single day. He has the membership things.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He goes to the car wash every day.

[Asante]

I'm sure it's there.

[Dustin Ross]

He got a brand new truck he love. He do that every day. Every single day, he go to the

[Asante]

car wash. That is so funny.

[Francesca (Fran)]

My partner's old school. He. He sets up. He has all the machines and everything. He washes.

[Dustin Ross]

Put the wiper up. Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He backs it up on the sidewalk and just washes it down as part of his, like, Sunday regimen. It is. I. Did I tell y', all, this white lady was walking past, and she asked him, oh, you wash cars?

[Dustin Ross]

Mine hoe.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And he looked at her and said, yeah, my car in front of my house. Do you know she.

[Dustin Ross]

What did she do for.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No, but y' all even worse. She was, like, so apologetic. She starts crying of course she did. She starts crying, telling him that what she just did is horrible and that she's so embarrassed. So she leaves, she comes back. And then she comes back again. Yes, because apparently she went and talked to her wife and her wife like, oh, it was like, oh, my God. Yes. A white lesbian.

[Dustin Ross]

A white lesbian from Port Y' all got hit by the worst pop possible.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like, she comes back again now in a full out whale crying because apparently her wife like flipped the fuck out that she did that, you know, to the only black family. Like, it was just such drama. And I was just like, thank God I wasn't there because I can't die.

[Dustin Ross]

You gotta see it, Frank.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But you know what's worse? We saw her. We saw her. And he looked at me and goes, that's the lady. And I looked at her and I said, oh, that's her. And that made her. She looked like she wanted to die. I said, oh, that's her. And she turned and she literally looked like she wanted to die. Because I was like, you fucking crazy ass. How are you gonna come up to a person and ask them, oh, you wash cars. Why would you ask him that? You know exactly why you asked him that. And you know exactly why you started crying.

[Dustin Ross]

Baby, let me tell you how quick that Harlem in New York came up out of fringe. That all that y' all just heard. That was the. That was friend.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Friend.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay? And I already know because.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Are you kidding me?

[Dustin Ross]

You talking about cussing somebody? The out all of that. Do I work here? Any of that? I will. Oh my. You get. You become like it says in the Bible, incensed with anger. And I know that's what happened to you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And he found it funny. Like he thought it was. He was cracking up because he was like these weirdos. But for me, it just like made my blood boil. Like, I was like, I'm actually thankful that I wasn't there because I wouldn't have been kind about that. That type of pisses me the off. Especially

[Asante]

you put her in headlock, huh?

[Francesca (Fran)]

And it's the crying. It's the crying for me. Like, come on now. And then coming back, coming back because your wife was disappointed in you. Let's not do this.

[Asante]

I'd have put my gay card out so fast, but girl, go on, get your crying ass. Hear that?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah. Out of be Suki, please get out of here. I want some. You know she's selling it. No. Sukiana makes somebody on baddies for those who don't know. And now she sells like suki I

[Francesca (Fran)]

was like, she sells bear maciana. A regular suki.

[Asante]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Why does she sell? Sell be.

[Dustin Ross]

To keep these hoes at bay, like that lady.

[Asante]

You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

That's what it was.

[Asante]

She met somebody on Baddie's Friend. She stole somebody awful. She stole somebody else's mace to go mace this girl on stage while all the baddies were on stage. What this? At their. One of their tour stops.

[Dustin Ross]

And guess who didn't care?

[Asante]

Now, I mean, I was at home, so I personally enjoyed it.

[Dustin Ross]

If I would have been there, I'd have been like, so, good job, job, good job. That's what I would if I was there, because I was happy she did it. And it was that. It was that orange color, too, so you could really see it when it hit it. The girl had a white shirt on, so it was beautiful.

[Asante]

Yeah, I can't.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I can't.

[Asante]

She deserved it.

[Dustin Ross]

That is hilarious. Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But Asante, that's so exciting. I'm excited for your car stories and car journeys.

[Asante]

Oh, and friend, with that, in closing, I'll just give you one of my car stories at one moment. Moment I was listening to. First of all, I really. I remember what kind of driver I was when I adjusted my seat, which is so funny. Right there.

[Dustin Ross]

Yep. Driver seat on Terror Squad.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I don't get how y' all do that. I tried it a little bit. I was like, you know what?

[Asante]

Let me see better. And I got better control. It's just something real.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like, I make fun of him all the time. I'm like, how do you.

[Asante]

Something in my negativity, my gene just activates, and I'm just able to see more efficiently.

[Dustin Ross]

I don't even think I could see down the road if I was all up.

[Asante]

I promise you, Dustin, when I was doing that, I feel like I was driving worse when I was trying to be like a good driver versus when I was like, you know what? Relax. You know how to drive. And I was like, oh, my God, you do know how to drive. But I hope you can't see from my example what kind of driver I was. Anyway, as I was riding down the road, my playlist was on shuffle. Solange. I remember putting on this particular driving playlist. I couldn't decide which Solange songs should stay or go, so I put the entire Seat at the Table project on the playlist, and it was on shuffle. A lot of beautiful moments. One of my favorite moments of all time is we were in Atlanta and we were returning the rental car and Crystal was Driving. I was in the front seat, Dustin and back. Who else was with us in the back? Yes. And as we return to rental, we were going through the last of our products and we were going over these speed humps real slow motion. I just remember having a beautiful moment as which song was.

[Dustin Ross]

Let me tell it. Okay, so here's what happened.

[Asante]

I do love your perspective.

[Dustin Ross]

So we are. It was a white Dodge Journey. That's what kind of car was. It was a white Dodge Journey suv. We got in. Crystal was driving. I was in the. In the back behind the driver's seat. Okay. We get into the airport to return.

[Asante]

You couldn't even see how crazy, how amazing.

[Dustin Ross]

This is what happens. So we are blasting. This is what. When a seat at the table was out. We are blasting FUBU right by Salons. This shit is for us. You know what I'm saying? We blasting it. We are higher than high at this point. We pull into the airport and, you know, there's a guided path to returning rental cars. You have to follow a path and then park in them lanes. And it's speed bumps and all that, so you can't drive fast. So anything that's noticeable about your car or your situation is that much more noticeable because you're creeping at a low speed speed. Crystal, we're listening to FUBU in the car. We pull into the garage and we see all these families getting out of their rental cars.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I remember this.

[Dustin Ross]

That, like, don't look like us, you know? And so Crystal decides to turn up the song as loud as. And these niggas is leaning off the car.

[Asante]

This shit is for us.

[Dustin Ross]

Like. Like, yeah, it. All these as we're parking now, mind you, those are close quarters where you have to. It's a parking ramp, so the space is limited. So when we pulled in, we was like right up on this family that was getting out of their car with all their bags.

[Asante]

It's so crystal full.

[Dustin Ross]

They turned around like between.

[Asante]

Between the song being so slow. Crystal driving slowly over those speed bumps

[Dustin Ross]

and us being so high and yell. She was driving and yelling.

[Asante]

Great moment. All money is in the whole wide world.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I can see it.

[Asante]

This shit is for us and the white people back and look in the back like, man, when I tell you

[Dustin Ross]

I could not get it together. I could not stop laughing. I was laughing in my sleep on the plane. Like, that's how I could not stop laughing. I could not stop. That was one of the way those people and them little kids especially were reacting to that. I will never forget that. Ever in my life.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I remember y' all telling the story.

[Asante]

That moment was so. I felt that moment, like, from my deepest depths as I was driving again. And I remember. And you know what, Dustin? Lucky for you, we didn't get to that end part of that song in that moment. Because you know how. When them be just going off at the end of this song, you can tell the people.

[Dustin Ross]

You can tell that them people. People wanted to say something. That's what made it so funny. But they weren't like, they didn't want to take that chance. It was too many of us. You know what I'm saying? Right, friend? It was too many of us for them to like, to turn that shit down. That's what they wanted to say. And then we were saying nigga and shit. This shit is for us. And it was little kid. It was awful. But it was one of the funniest things that has ever happened in my life.

[Asante]

For real was black history, and it was not Black History Month.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, my God. In a white car.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Memories.

[Asante]

This is full.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Well, happy birthday.

[Asante]

Thank you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

We're glad that you're smiling and you have good thoughts and memories and got

[Asante]

your new car and how to

[Francesca (Fran)]

road tripping. Oh, and I love that you're road tripping.

[Asante]

Thank you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I want to know where you went. Obviously off record.

[Asante]

Thank you both. Good luck.

[Dustin Ross]

We win.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Absolutely. Dustin Ross, your turn. You had a double live show in New York at the City Winery the second tour. I know you're caroling that shit.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm very excited. All new jokes. I locked the show. The show being written for. For like two weeks. And I've been practicing. They working with a coach and shit. And today I moved a couple jokes around today, but I locked it in and just send it out so they can do what they gotta do at the venue. But the show's locked in. I say all that to say the show is locked in. I'm feeling good. I'm ready. My clothes are ready. Cause that's important.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yes, it is.

[Dustin Ross]

I feel good, and I'm ready to get up on stage and talk shit. And more than anything, I'm just grateful that people came to see me. That is the ultimate compliment. This is not a show comprised of me and a roster of comedians. I'm by myself. So these people that bought these tickets came to see me, and I am so grateful and thankful. So it's time. I got work to do. And just like Yaya said in that Lifetime movie, time to go be Whitney Houston. It's time to go Be Whitney Houston.

[Asante]

You are insane. But because of your insanity, we love you.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Asante]

Rather. We love you so much. We are so happy and proud of you. You're gonna do amazing tonight.

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you.

[Asante]

For those of you listening and if you had the chance to make it out, because, you know, we pre recording, let us know how. How great he did down below what you love. Don't give away none of the jokes, all right? And tell them that you're gonna go to the next one. Okay?

[Dustin Ross]

That's right.

[Asante]

And obviously leave requests for other cities.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm very happy. I am very happy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

This is so exciting.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes. I can't wait for tonight. Tonight, tonight, tonight. Smashing Pumpkin said, I can't wait. So excited.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You need a Portland stop.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm coming. I'm coming to Portland because I want

[Francesca (Fran)]

to talk to them people in the cosmos, though. So I guess that's close enough, right?

[Dustin Ross]

But who knows? We're hitting some other markets this time, and I'm really excited to get to go see the people, you know what I'm saying? So Portland is a huge market, and Portland needs to laugh. So I feel called. And plus, one of my best friends lives in Portland, so I have to go out there.

[Asante]

You know what I'm saying?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, you don't even know. First of all, all, it would be so cute because I would drive to your show.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'll come pick you up at the airport, take you to get food.

[Dustin Ross]

Or we're going riding. We're going riding around. We're gonna go ride, you know, take

[Francesca (Fran)]

you to the dispensary. Just make sure you're good before your show, you know?

[Dustin Ross]

Thank you so much.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So cute.

[Dustin Ross]

It's gonna happen. So I look forward to that in addition to a lot of other cities. So I'm just glad I'm ready to get on stage and talk my. So I wrote some controversial stuff.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's how you do it.

[Asante]

So I thought of you because I

[Francesca (Fran)]

saw yesterday, the St. Patrick's Day people, everyone walking. Yeah. And here they do a run like. Like a half marathon. Everybody's dressed in green. I don't know. It's like a tradition, I guess. And when I saw them, I was like, oh, it made me think of Dustin because I know that's the tradition now of how you kick off your chores. So I think that's pretty cool. That's.

[Asante]

So you wearing all green tonight?

[Dustin Ross]

Hell, no.

[Asante]

She gonna let everybody pinch you?

[Dustin Ross]

Hell no. First of all, this ain't even our holiday. You know what I'm saying, like, so none of that counts, but. And my show last year was literally called FSPD, which stood for what, St. Patrick's Day. So I enjoy the day.

[Asante]

That's why I know you're gonna wear all green tonight.

[Dustin Ross]

You pinch me, you gonna get a broke arm. You know what I'm saying? So I got. You know, that's the shit I'm on. But yes, I'm very excited about tonight. I can't wait. So I'll update y' all on it went mana.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yes. And speaking of tours, shout out to our friends over at the Read who I saw just announced that they will be kicking off theirs at in Atlanta. I was like, what? Not Atlanta.

[Asante]

Atl.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But I get it. You got to switch it up. Right? It's been, what, 13 years of being in New York.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It's time to switch it. So I think that's actually gonna be really fun. Make sure you check that out. Right, Right. So exciting. So that's. Yeah. Those are the questions that I have for my brothers. How are y' all feeling otherwise?

[Asante]

Oh, we already went through the questions.

[Dustin Ross]

We made it through her preguntas on

[Asante]

the p. I thought I was still waiting on.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No, I need. I just those weird.

[Asante]

I have a question for you. This is so inconsequential, unimportant, and we can actually move over very quickly. Huda on tmz Hood who Exactly. From Love Island.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What she do

[Dustin Ross]

is so funny.

[Asante]

Perfect person for that. So you know how she was dating that dude from the Netflix show or whatever?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, yeah, because they. The one that they got caught saying weird about Alandria.

[Asante]

Mind you, that was like my last interaction with them.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I mean, this thought she was canceled after that. I haven't heard of her since as

[Asante]

of literally this morning. Cuz I was just on Twitter, you know, which I rarely get on. And I saw this. I was, oh, what's going on here? Apparently she was on TMZ because she was trying to un alive herself and she threatened and she. She showed up at old boy baby mama house and was walking around, I guess, looking for him. They showed the threat of text messages between them because he had, I guess, filed some restraint orders on her because of such crazy acts. It was real crazy. I was like, so hooded was a crash out. For real. For real. And I just thought that was super scary to see.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yikes.

[Asante]

Her daughter's life and everything. I was like, what is. Like, this is. Yikes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It's crazy to see how this all turned out because remember, she was on Top of the world when she came out. I'm talking about crowd favorite.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So to see what happened, you know, like, dang, damn. What happened?

[Dustin Ross]

Landria is on. Shelly is on. Jana is on. Right.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Who's Janae?

[Asante]

Oh, yeah, Janae been on. She was on season before that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Three girls from the seasons and prides. Serena.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes. Serena on. So hooded. That's on you, girl.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Crazy, though, because you were literally the favorite, even though you were the crash out. She had everybody. Like, that's crazy to me.

[Dustin Ross]

But I mean, coulda.

[Asante]

There was a trailer for, I guess, another season of Life after the Villa. What do they call it? I don't remember.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But, yeah, I told you. I tried that first one, and it didn't.

[Asante]

I didn't watch it. And I just. Which is why I might even be getting this wrong, because I saw it in passing, but I thought I saw a trailer for this upcoming season or whatever for it, and I don't think I see anything from what I saw. I didn't see any of the people I cared about about on it. I think I saw, like, a glimpse

[Francesca (Fran)]

of Nick because they're too big. They're not gonna be on.

[Asante]

So I was like, well, damn. Like, so who's left to watch this? Like, who is watching this?

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, Landry on the carpet.

[Asante]

I mean, everywhere.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Did y' all see that new. I saw the trailer for a new show. It's another one of those love shows, but it's an age gap.

[Dustin Ross]

No show.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. So they basically the same. Like, Love Island. Not like that. They're not, like, living there, but they're all together. Together, meeting, hanging out. You click with who you click with. And then I guess after weeks of y' all kicking it, deciding who you're sticking with, in the end, they reveal their ages. And in the clip, I saw handsome, older black man. He was 60. And when the girl revealed her age, she was 24.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, well, he won't. Yeah. I was just gonna say, let me think about this.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I mean, he's not. He don't. He looks great for 60. But it still was like, what the hell? What are we doing right now? I think that the. I think the timing of that feels off with all this Epstein and, you know, these conversations we're having about how young girls.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Are. We're treated and the predators and all that. It just felt weird that this.

[Asante]

Is this on.

[Francesca (Fran)]

On. On Netflix.

[Asante]

Netflix. Somebody at Netflix is working really, really hard on the love shows. I think they found. Or maybe it's my marketing, because I didn't watch Autumn Seasons of Love is aggravated. But I feel like because those shows are so successful, they are making love shows out the woodwork. And I'm not trying to excuse this show. I'm just trying to say they just need to. Somebody needs to take a break and, or, or question some of these because I saw like three different love shows on Netflix and I was like, what are all these shows? There was one about people that have cheated and they're trying to come back together and see if they really want to be together. There was another show, like legit. They, they were coming in, some of them had already knew that, you know, why they were broke up. Some of them had more stuff to reveal. I was like, hey, y' all are coming into this house to reveal more stuff. This is crazy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And wasn't there a MILF one like with their mothers or something?

[Asante]

HBO Max. But, but, but even still, like to your point, weird.

[Dustin Ross]

That's too much crossover for me.

[Asante]

Like, Netflix just dropped another series, Therapy, but I don't know if they picked. But did they pick that up?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I don't know. I don't know.

[Dustin Ross]

I have some questions about the old people show because you said that he was 60 and she was 24. So when they revealed each other, did she like, is she exhale and was she like, oh my God.

[Francesca (Fran)]

She was kind of like, what the. She said she assumed he was like 45 or something because, you know, he clearly looks older. But she was like, I, she seemed stuck. To be honest, I didn't.

[Dustin Ross]

Was it too late for her to back out?

[Francesca (Fran)]

No, I think that's the premise of the show. It's like, oh, fuck that. Or fuck, you know, oh, yes, this works. And I, I don't know. I didn't. Like I said it was a clip. So I don't know if she did move forward, but she was like, hell no. 60 at 24.

[Dustin Ross]

Ain't no way. I'm. I wouldn't even do it now.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What are we even talking about though? Like, for real. Because even I remember being 24 and I was with a 35 year old and even that felt a lot like, even now when I look back, being the age I am now, I'm like, what the fuck was he thinking? Why was a 35 year old old in a relationship with a 24 year old?

[Dustin Ross]

Like, right, right something.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No matter how mature, quote unquote, I was, it just. That's weird. And now that I'm this age, I can look back and say that he was weird for that so 60 is just like not. Not it to me.

[Dustin Ross]

I know.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And he seemed excited though.

[Dustin Ross]

I bet he did. I bet he did. He hit the jacket because that wouldn't happen. Welcome to the Friends every time.

[Francesca (Fran)]

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[Dustin Ross]

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[Asante]

Did you watch Blue Therapy, friend?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I did watch Blue Therapy.

[Asante]

How many episodes of Blue Therapy did you watch?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'mma say maybe three.

[Asante]

Okay. About the same as I did Therapy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

White woman.

[Asante]

Look, they're try. It's like. Was it the British or UK version of what's the other one that we

[Francesca (Fran)]

actually like of couples therapy? Yep.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But she's not orna. Sorry.

[Asante]

She's not.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Sorry.

[Asante]

She's blue. She is. Absolutely.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And everyone was black. And I thought that that was changed also.

[Dustin Ross]

And blue. Now I get.

[Asante]

Oh, my God. Okay. I did not expect this to happen. I'm so glad we could talk talk about this friend. Wait. Because I just remembered I need to keep watching. Actually, I. I need to keep watching. There was this couple, Dustin. So Blue Therapy is couples and therapy. I don't think that they're married. I think that they're all.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Some of them are.

[Asante]

Some of them are one couple. They've been in a relationship for I don't know how long. The woman, she wants to get married. She's with the Vulgarist.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You're right. None of them are married. Because I just remembered they're all. All like either fiance, right? Yeah.

[Asante]

I think they're all just. They're trying. Because I don't even think they're trying to talk. Well, this first couple, they're trying to. She's trying to talk about marriage. It's a black woman dating this Bulgarian Russian man or whatever. She wants to get married. Don't go together.

[Dustin Ross]

Don't go see him, girl.

[Asante]

They've been together seven years. They're in therapy because she feels like he's been promising her marriage by. With these rings that he's been Gifting her for her birthday. He feels like, you know, if they love each other enough, then it should be enough. They don't need to get married. And also the rings where, you know, just promise to make her happy, not necessarily marry her.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Crazy.

[Asante]

Some. So they're working that out in therapy. There's another.

[Dustin Ross]

How many carrots are we talking? You know what I'm saying?

[Asante]

I mean, honestly, it didn't like nothing crazy to run home and tell mom about. But they're content creator. They're a YouTube couple. I know content creators too. Brought up an umbrella now and it sounds like other things. So they are a YouTube couple. She's also been secretly sending money to her family. Family behind his back. Just lying. As she should. Right. But. But she's still been lying. She's still been lying. So it's still an issue.

[Dustin Ross]

Right.

[Asante]

Another couple, they have a baby together. They met. They both are attractive. They're attracted to each other. There was some infidelity there. So now they don't trust each other. So they're working through that.

[Dustin Ross]

How did the baby look? Because sometimes two fine people can have

[Asante]

a. I don't remember how the baby. I don't feel like the baby.

[Francesca (Fran)]

They didn't show anybody's babies. They just showed from the back, which I thought was cool.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, me too. Because it's not important. See what I would have done, called the baby ugly because they. You see what I'm saying?

[Asante]

See, I'm just gonna get to names,

[Dustin Ross]

but it was a celebrity couple that was supposed to be so beautiful and they had kids together and the world was like, oh, okay. But I'm not gonna say who it was. Go ahead.

[Asante]

You know what? I want people to leave in the comments.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay.

[Asante]

No, no, no, you're right. Sorry.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No kids. No kids.

[Asante]

Yeah, no kids. You're right. I'm sorry. I fell for the trap.

[Dustin Ross]

Damn. I ain't saying that. I just said that they. That they, you know, I did.

[Asante]

I take responsibility. I take accountability. This last couple. There's might be other couples. I think they're bringing some in. I don't know. But this last couple is the reason I need to keep watching. It's a. It's a black man. And I think. I don't know if she mixed. Light skinned.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah, I couldn't tell you.

[Asante]

It's a. And it's a black man in this woman. Right. That's together. I can't even give you the long version, Dustin. This has been lying to her about what? About having a job. So they're in therapy for financial issues. Now she makes more money than him because we. We found out about that at the very end of this third or fourth. A third episode. Because fr. You were where I'm at. So you know this. So initially it's just like, oh, he. He likes to spend. But, you know, he also doesn't like the fact that I make more in him. And he also be having financial issues and I don't.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He's in a lot of debt.

[Asante]

You got debt.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And yeah.

[Asante]

And she be, you know, holding it down.

[Dustin Ross]

So what wouldn't he like about that? You should be thankful.

[Asante]

So I forgot what his gripe was with her because all of that went out with the window. When I found out he had been lying to her. He had been. He'd been literally dusting, getting dressed, leaving the house, like, pretending he was going to work for months. I forgot if it was like two,

[Dustin Ross]

three months, you lied, break up.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But that's what I said immediately.

[Asante]

Look at you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

The same. You got up and I would believe a word. We had breakfast. You got in your car.

[Asante]

We will co parent from here on out. I will do it through the court system.

[Dustin Ross]

Your parents, you said, right?

[Francesca (Fran)]

They have two, I believe. And he said he would drive around the block, she would head to work, and he'd come back to the house and kick it because he got let go find another job to tell her. Right? Because he. And why can't you come home and be like, they let me go? What kind of.

[Asante]

You would have heard the arguments they were having before that point. Because she was saying, like, you know, he's not good with money. So when he shops, he likes to do a lot of shopping. Like I tell him, oh, if you want to buy a nice cologne, just get one or two. You don't have to get at five. And then he. And then he's like, see, right there. I feel like she's judging me. Like, she's like.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like he was like, she talks to me like I'm a child. Because you are paying for 70 of the rent and you're buying seven colognes and you're $12,000 in debt. You are a child.

[Asante]

He said all of that, which was some. But then to get to him having pretended to go to work for two months, I was like, nigga, I knew you was on somebody, but you want some?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm sorry, but that.

[Asante]

I mean, because you can't be for real.

[Dustin Ross]

How is my.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And I can tell she's gonna stay with him. I can just feel it. Well, that's you know what, shout out to her. But I'm like, I will never look at you. I'm gonna see you getting up and lying to me every morning. Even if you do have a job.

[Asante]

If she stay with him, I hope you know he gets through a really good, good financial coaching program and gets a really good job and she gives her a really nice side or whatever, whatever the arrangement turns out to be. I just hope it works out really well for her in the end because

[Dustin Ross]

wow, what a dumbass. What a, what a sorry ass. And what a dumbass. If she stays with him, she that's on her. Like you, you cannot have kids with them. You can't. All the more reason to hit the bricks.

[Asante]

But I know for some people that's

[Dustin Ross]

like, you can't get a more clean exit than that, right? Especially as the parent. You can't have nobody that financially irresponsible making decisions for your household.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What? And then you didn't tell me until we got on tv, which is crazy. How we looking divorce him, right?

[Asante]

I mean, not even co parent him right now through the court and take your half girl. And she's doing well enough to where she don't even need to take the half.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Take whatever little pocket change you just house down. The therapist asked, do you know how much debt he's in? And she was like, I think so. It's like $6,000. And then he was quiet and then she was like, is that right? He goes, it's double. And in my mind I'm like, it's probably more. And he's believe him. How can you believe him if he's paying for seven colognes? And then when the therapist asked him, well, what are you spending the money on, Dustin? He gonna say take out.

[Dustin Ross]

And that's exactly what she need to do with him. Take him out to the curb.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And here's the one that really got me. The girl says that when he goes to the supermarket, oh, he buys his own groceries. Remember, they're in a house with two babies. He buys groceries that are organic and farm whatever the all for himself.

[Asante]

For himself.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He buys groceries for himself.

[Dustin Ross]

Why is she really with him?

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's what I'm like. It just was worse. Every, every new relation is abusive to me.

[Dustin Ross]

Like that is abusive when you start separating food. And that's abusive to me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

My uncle used to do that when we were, when we were young because I told you, we lived with my grandparents and all my aunts and uncles, mad people in the house. He used to do that. And even though that's so childish, but I kind of understood because he's like,

[Asante]

y' all gonna eat my groceries, but not your men.

[Dustin Ross]

Nut your man in the crib with you who ain't working no damn way.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Babies where we're in a house together where if you go, you should be the last one.

[Dustin Ross]

You the last one. She eat every day. You should make sure everybody else in the crib get a fruit.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You know what I'm saying? And then you're buying yourself organic. Like, she's saying essentially that he buys himself the top of the line quality food.

[Dustin Ross]

Right. To sit on the damn couch in secret. Kiss my ass. The way he would be. The way I would be so gone. So who gone?

[Francesca (Fran)]

I don't know. A lot of those things were just unforgivable. Several couples friend, man.

[Dustin Ross]

And that should be a line for everybody. A lying about going to work for three months for three days and buying

[Francesca (Fran)]

groceries and all and allowing you to pay. 70% of the household said, marriage ain't that good.

[Dustin Ross]

I listen that on the ipod, like, I'm out of here.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That and then the other. There was two ones that out thought were interesting because it was essentially businessmen that were. That had started companies that did so well that they're so busy. So busy. But they, you know, have beautiful homes and their wives are taken care of. And, you know, they're not. They Right. But the wives were like, sad because they're like, yes, this might be the dream for most girls to have a provider to this level. But like, you're lonely and you don't have anyone there and it's your birthday and they're canceling it.

[Dustin Ross]

Don't nobody give a about you. You ain't got no family, no friends. Don't nobody care.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I was laughing at those because I was like, man, am I problematic because I would be in the house.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm just like, we would be together forever.

[Asante]

Sounds like a great time.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You said forever.

[Dustin Ross]

50th anniversary.

[Asante]

Wish you were here.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What money. And you ain't home.

[Dustin Ross]

Ain't glad you're gone. What the fuck? And you talking about you lonely. You want to cry in the ultima. Well, not even that, because ultimas. I never understood why people shame them. But the way they say, would you rather cry in that or the Maybach? You know what I mean? Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I was so fascinated watching these women talking about this would be the dream for other girls. And I was sitting there like.

[Dustin Ross]

And guys, what are you talking? Like, what? The way I would be growing up

[Francesca (Fran)]

starting with was like, he's. He'll buy me, you know, Van Cleef this and all this stuff. And she was like saying that it's just not enough and it would actually piss her off so much that she purposely doesn't wear anything that he gives her a value because she doesn't want him to think that that's enough. Like you don't do that.

[Dustin Ross]

You ain't gave it back.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I would have been. I would have been crazy.

[Asante]

Forgot about the. I was definitely too drippy. I was dripping them out, you know

[Francesca (Fran)]

when they do the thing with the nails.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Hey guys,

[Dustin Ross]

are you crazy? Like, what do you mean?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Shout out to women, man? Because y', all, you know. Shout out to y'. All.

[Dustin Ross]

Shout out to y'.

[Francesca (Fran)]

All.

[Asante]

I forgot about them because she was the one that was like giving him the ultimatum. And she was like, it sounds like. He was like, it sounds like you want to choose between you or work. And she was like, no. And then the therapist was like, well,

[Dustin Ross]

yeah, ok, maybe what the is he supposed to do? If he was a broke ass, you wouldn't want him.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right. But all jokes aside, the only thing I will say is the guys are kind of like. They were, they were. And that does come with it. Like I've been with someone that was really wealthy and thess is a lot of why they succeeded. Right. It's like it almost comes as a second nature. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

You have to contain that kind of. That's fine in the office.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's fine. What I think you, you have to know turn it on and on.

[Dustin Ross]

But not in the living room, you

[Asante]

know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Like, what the fuck? Definitely not in the bathroom. I'm lactose.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like she said if she was out with her homegirls and if he felt it was too late, he would be like the Uber's outside. Essentially like it's time for you to go home. What?

[Dustin Ross]

That's marriage.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So you don't give me attention, but then you check. You like checking what I'm doing when friends you don't get to do that.

[Dustin Ross]

He love you, girl.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's what he said.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm talking though telling me to come outside.

[Asante]

He was real firm on that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah, he was. He didn't even think it sound crazy. He was like, I mean it's late, she need to be home.

[Asante]

Yep.

[Dustin Ross]

Any relationship I ever been in, I've had very firm boundaries when it came to a. Trying to tell me what to do because the controlling. Because of growing up in a organized religion and all that that I have. And I. I know this about myself, right? Self awareness is step one or two, Right. I don't like nobody trying to police me in no way. You ain't finna survey.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I hate it.

[Dustin Ross]

You're not fitting to tell me when and where, who and what. You're not finna tell me shit honestly. And I'm not gonna tell you shit.

[Asante]

You know what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

I'm fair about that. Like, I'm gonna give you your space, but I will go ahead and. You know how you pick and choose your battles and shit. I pick that one every single time. I will argue with you for days about you trying to tell me what I can and can't do.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Agreed.

[Dustin Ross]

Always. I'm gonna be 80. Like that nigga on that show. Oh, he said he was 60, right?

[Francesca (Fran)]

It's 80s crazy.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, I'm gonna be 80.

[Asante]

Like, what?

[Dustin Ross]

You know what I'm saying? You can't tell me where I came. It can't go.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And that's the worst feeling. One of the people I dated, he. I remember he was so controlled patrolling, y'. All. He would time my commute.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like, he would be like, well, the train from 14th street to 100. Yeah. On the 2 train on a Saturday is a la la. Like, it shouldn't have taken that long. And then your walk from the train to. And I'll be sitting there like, this is crazy. Right? Like, time.

[Asante]

At least you existed in a time when a Nick can't. Couldn't drop an air tag in your bag.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, God. Or remember when. When. If someone tried to call you, they couldn't get through. Now they can a lot of times. But on the train, I was always the best alibi.

[Dustin Ross]

I was on the train one time somebody. Never mind. F. To tell all my business. Never mind. Sorry, y'.

[Asante]

All.

[Dustin Ross]

I hate doing that. But no, I'm not even going to tell that on this show. I'll tell y' all later, though.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But that controlling. That was the only thing. Like, I didn't necessarily understand why girls feel right.

[Dustin Ross]

Think about your security, your future.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But if he. But if he's trash and don't want to talk about his feelings. And did you see the stud girl?

[Dustin Ross]

I. I like that. I don't want to talk about my feelings. I don't think I made it feel good.

[Francesca (Fran)]

There was a girl that's a stud. She was awful. My God, she. She end up a goddamn storm. And then just. Just not really caring about it. It was weird. I was like, why Are y' all

[Dustin Ross]

out there cosplaying as an ain't shit nigga, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm gonna do it like this. Fuck that. I be getting along with Studs, though. It either go good or real bad usually. But more often than not good. Think about some of our friends and their partners and stuff. I've always gotten along with them, like, on a personal level, outside of you just kicking it with my friend, we end up like, you know what I'm saying? Then when they break up, I don't ever have no problem picking the side, though. And you know what friend I'm talking about? They'll. They would tell you themselves. I drew a line in that sand. We was at Afropunk.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yup. Very.

[Dustin Ross]

I was like, don't be. I understand. We was cool. But you know where. You know where I'm at. You know what I'm saying?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, shit. She was awful. She was awful.

[Asante]

Three is the last episode. I stopped on, I think, Blue Therapy. Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay.

[Asante]

Because I see this woman's face, but I don't actually remember which story she was. Do you remember which?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. She's one of the ones that her husband is doing really well financially. Yeah. She's beautiful woman.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

All her outfits were super nice. She's a very beautiful woman. She's the one that's the problem. Her husband, she's lonely.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh, girl.

[Francesca (Fran)]

She said she'd be at home looking like a foot with two kids. And then. But I will say. But on his days off, he's hanging

[Dustin Ross]

with his homeboys because she's got a sour attitude.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Who want to be around that childish. He went to go see Usher.

[Dustin Ross]

Be around your downtrodden mean ass. Mean ass. I'm going. I'm out and I'm home.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm going with my happy friend.

[Dustin Ross]

Crazy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He went to see Usher with his homeboys on his day off as he

[Dustin Ross]

didn't eat the cherry.

[Asante]

That's insane.

[Dustin Ross]

As long as he didn't eat the cherry, she's good.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I want to know why everyone was black. That's what I would like to know.

[Dustin Ross]

Black wealth. Sound like black money to me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Therapist. Something about the. The optics. I wasn't loving it, I have to admit, because at least, Orna, it's like a diverse cast of, you know, you have literally everybody.

[Dustin Ross]

She don't show emotion. The couple's therapy lady. Orna. She's right. Well, do you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I love her. I so wish she was my therapist.

[Dustin Ross]

I could get in there. I could get in there with Her. I could get in there with her. I could. I could get.

[Francesca (Fran)]

She break you down.

[Dustin Ross]

She can't with me. But. But I. But I would participate. You know what I'm saying? I would be willing.

[Asante]

You can't play with Lorna.

[Dustin Ross]

She can't play with me either.

[Asante]

I'm just gonna take a moment here.

[Dustin Ross]

There's something happening. No, we're not. Nothing's happening. I answered your question, and I'm paying

[Francesca (Fran)]

you, and it's time. The time's up and I'm leaving. I can see that.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay, well, exactly. I already got my coat on.

[Asante]

I see her talking to her other therapist. Like, he just, you know, he just was in and out. Let me tell you something.

[Dustin Ross]

Couples therapy is all.

[Asante]

But I know I can't challenge, right? Because the black masculinity,

[Dustin Ross]

You know, couples therapy and is. I don't know if you all have ever experienced couples therapy before, but it's all.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But I would love to.

[Dustin Ross]

It's all good until you win in all the arguments. And then the other person don't want to go no more. Oh, especially when the therapist. And not even when you not trying.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Do they. Do they feel like the therapist is taking your side? Because that happens a lot when I watch the shows.

[Dustin Ross]

They see. It was their idea, though. Like, this person. This person wanted to do that. Made me, made me do it. You know, Made me. They made me do it.

[Francesca (Fran)]

The emphasis on made me.

[Dustin Ross]

And so we did it. But when we did it, and I was like, okay, well, shit, if we doing, I'm finna do it, you know, if we gonna have this conversation, I'm gonna be honest. And when I would lay things out, the therapist, she was a lady. Black lady. Shout out to you, girl.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Nice.

[Dustin Ross]

And I think you'd be listening to the show because I didn't see you slip up and like a few things a couple times over the past years. But anyways. Cause she don't follow me. But I didn't peep saying stuff. I'm like, I see you so. And. And I peeped it. Because when we would go through that, she would literally be like, well, such and such. Such, you know, I mean, and she would lay it out just like I did. And the person stopped wanting to go after that ass. It only took two. It only took maybe like two months. Maybe like eight sessions of that for the person to abandon ship. Abandon ship.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I would love to do that.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, it's fun when I. You know what I'm saying?

[Asante]

Oh, my word.

[Dustin Ross]

Because I was, you know, think about that like a formal space where you're giving your side and I'm giving mine. I was born for this. So, like we would get in there once. It's once I got act because I've been to therapy by myself, but that was my first time going with somebody once I understood how that thing worked, which only took half of one session for me because me and her was locked in halfway through. But once I understood this shit, I was like, oh, please. I was ready. We went on Mondays. I was ready when I tell you that next Monday, 8 o'. Clock. So yesterday. And then when we would do it after we had gotten into it, like the days before, if we were in the middle of an argument and we would get in there not talking. But once we get in that therapy session and I get to throwing them heavyweight bows and I swear to God, like that just didn't want to go. And I was never going to ask them to go because I didn't want to go in the first damn place. And I had no need to gloat. The fact that I was the champ, the heavyweight champ of therapy, because you was there and that's why your ass don't want to go no more. So after that I was fine. You show.

[Francesca (Fran)]

They walking out the session. Dusty's like winning.

[Dustin Ross]

Look, you want to talk about it? Oh, okay.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So pretty.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I was listening to my favorite podcast, which is J Next. Well, yes. Well, yes. Death, Sex and Money. I love that podcast. Important discussions and they great conversations. They had an episode, it was a two part series and the second part launched today. And they were talking about marriages and relationships that are falling apart because of chatgpt.

[Dustin Ross]

How do what.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And I'm just like, that will forever never blow my mind.

[Dustin Ross]

How does it get to that point?

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's what I'm saying. And. And it was the one that I. Because I didn't get to finish the episode. The husband, I heard, he was just like, he's been racking his brain, right? Because he's like, is it my fault? Was I not giving her enough attention? He was like, was it quarantine that like maybe exasperated something she had already been feeling. Like they have two small kids. He's like, you know, having kids is a lot like, especially two small, small ones. Was it motherhood? Was it. What is it? Post, postpartum, postpartum? Like he was racking his brain because he said it just didn't make sense.

[Dustin Ross]

He said, changing pt.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He said, she's always, was just always really withdrawn from the family. Like I Don't know where she was just always in her phone hating them kids. And then he said the way she started texting him changed, like, and so he was like, you know, you have a way that you talk with your partner and you know how they text the tone. He said she started saying his name and saying like greeting, whatever his name was.

[Dustin Ross]

Can you imagine? Can you imagine? Hey, you all right? You just text me that you are you okay? The third day. Yo, what the is wrong with you?

[Francesca (Fran)]

And he said, oh. Her responses literally sounded like automated. Like automated just with dashes and the words that she was using. He said it was so cold. And he said he was like, this is the strangest thing. Her text started reading like business emails. And he said he was like really losing her. And then out of nowhere she started telling him that she knew he was cheating. And he said, how did you know? Like, where are you getting this from? And Chat GPT told her

[Dustin Ross]

that he GP cheat.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And it's crazy because he said that she. Which I didn't know. Apparently Chat GPT can do like not horoscopes but something similar, like personality tests where it can tell you about the people around you. I guess if you give it what their birth dates, I don't know what prompts you could be giving them that they can start giving you some kind of analysis of the people around you. And so that's how she, he became obsessed.

[Dustin Ross]

So his wife's crazy, in other words.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And she and the Chat GBT told him. But you know what's crazy? Recently a friend, me checking in on me because an app that they use told them that I because it's an app I've used before. So it has like, you know, it'll say your friend's name if you guys are friends in that. So it told them that I was like going through a really hard time and I'm like in depression and anxiety. They really need to check on me. And the friend was like, oh my God, are you okay? And they sent me the screenshot and I was like, I'm fine. And I was like, and that's fucking weird that this app would speak that on me with such certainty and then sent a prompt to my friend that make them hit me to see like, what's happening. I'm like, that's scary. I didn't like that. This weird ass app, I don't even use it anymore. But it's that feeling, you know, that people are leaning meaning on these apps, you know, for like ideas and for perspective and for Thoughts and it's just, it's a little scary. And he said he really lost his wife.

[Dustin Ross]

Like she, well, good reasons he's better off without her because she was a loony band.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So this made him start, start a discord community for people that are experiencing the same thing, whether they have lost their, their wife or a friend or a parent, a co worker, whatever the case may be or if maybe they're the ones that got lost, you know, they can kind of give some.

[Asante]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Put them all together so nobody else has to deal with them.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And the discord is people trying to figure out this phenomenon, you know. And he said that he had even used chat GBT to try to understand chat GBT after that happened. He said, said that he even asked chat GBT like what happened with my wife using her own, like trying to see if it'll say something. And it, yeah, he said it told him, it told him a made up a madeup illness. Like it told him, oh, she has dot, dot dot. And he said he was like, oh, maybe that's what it is. He said he went to look it up and it wasn't a thing.

[Asante]

He said what friend?

[Dustin Ross]

What he say? And it wasn't a thing because it's not a thing. It's electric. I don't know why these people are putting real world, real life expectations and responsibilities on a machine.

[Asante]

That's a problem.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Listen and leaving your family over.

[Asante]

There's two schools of thought I'm having here right now. Right. I'm thinking, thinking about, remember WebMD people used to just go on the Internet and self diagnose themselves.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yes.

[Asante]

Which you know, potentially beneficial but also potentially dangerous.

[Dustin Ross]

Right.

[Asante]

It was one of those things where people would just diagnose themselves. So they're like, oh, I know what I have, so let me go. You know, start taking whatever to fix this. Then they're going to the doctor and they're like, oh well, you actually created an issue right. When you didn't have one.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right.

[Asante]

This is one of those things. Like I think about chat GPT and I think, I think about WebMD people self diagnosing. And then I think about that movie compliance that we watched. Remember those people were literally all they had was a voice in their ear telling them what to do and they were doing whatever the voice said. Just because the voice said the right things. This ChatGPT, you can prompt it in a good way, a useful way, a productive way. You can prompt it to be productively terrible if you ever so choose. And I think people don't realize that or. Or know that people are so tech savvy, but they're not tech. Like, they're just like, you know how people are so smart that they're dumb?

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Asante]

Like, people are so tech savvy that they're fucking ignorant. Like, it just doesn't make sense. But these are the same people. Not us, but, you know, there are so many, Matt, in the masses. These are the same people that wake up in the middle of the night just to open their phone and, you know, check an email, whether they're looking for business or a shopping sale or open TikTok just to see what's going on. Like, these are the same people that do these things and they don't realize what it's taking away from them versus the people that are like, all right, let me use these things casually. Let me enjoy these things. Let me use these things for information educationally. Let me enjoy these things. Let me move on. When people kind of start pouring all of their, you know, data will use in this instant into one corner, it'll up your marriage, it'll up your relationship.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah, but this is.

[Dustin Ross]

I don't get it. I don't get it.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Because we've seen this consistent you want to have with.

[Asante]

We've seen this happen with kids spreadsheets.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yes.

[Asante]

We've seen this happen with children where the chat bots in I think upstate New York or some. Or like, what's the other part? Connecticut. Where the. The children were talking to the chatbots and the chat bots were being inappropriate with them. I remember that, you know what I'm

[Francesca (Fran)]

saying, to send them a nude or something. But I'm like, but are there like people behind that playing saying just, you know, like there has to be because

[Asante]

all of these AI things, there's that possibility there. There's that danger there. So that's why it doesn't make sense for someone to. For a woman to decide. And maybe she decided to use it just to respond to text initially and then she got more curious as it did more things and she abused. She self abused. Well, I think that's why it's important when we have these conversations about like, you know, are audits, whether it's personal health things. And I try to, you know, make sure we have our own tech audits, whether it's, you know, going through deleting things or just looking at how we use things, our relationships with things.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah.

[Asante]

We don't have to do everything in one place.

[Dustin Ross]

And it's weird to use an app to text people back. If you're. If you're having a conversation with people, you need to be a person having the conversation with the people that's having it with you. If it. There's no. There's no reason for her to be as. As especially. Didn't you say that? Yeah. And didn't you say. Was she one of the ones whose husband was. Husband was really busy.

[Francesca (Fran)]

No.

[Asante]

No.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay.

[Francesca (Fran)]

This is the.

[Asante]

You connecting me.

[Dustin Ross]

My bad.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, anyway, either way it go, whoever she was texting, there was no reason for her to be using that app. So that's. You gotta like, that's the root, you know. Has she never done that? She never would've progressed to the other level. So you gotta check yourself with that shit. And I don't want to re. For me, it's not even a challenge to keep a boundary between me and my life and my choices and decisions and shit and fucking the Internet, you know what I'm saying? Like, there's a clear natural boundary for me. I can understand maybe for somebody who's younger and born into a world where all this is the way that it works. Asante, you said that kids are susceptible to this. That makes sense too because kids aren't fully developed. They don't get it Right.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right.

[Dustin Ross]

But you grown ups.

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[Dustin Ross]

Warning the following film is so intense

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we are only allowed to advertise it for 15 seconds.

[Dustin Ross]

Excuse me, Sussy Bates. They will kill you. Only in theaters March 2027.

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[Francesca (Fran)]

But that's the thing. So in the episode, they also had a young girl who said that she was just using it casually, like as an assistant. Which understandable, right? Helping her curate emails, you know, spreadsheets. She said that out of nowhere, right? She said out of nowhere, nowhere. The chat GPT starts telling her like, hey, like hey, like you were this person in a past life. And tells her, no, hard stop. So she's like. She's like, imagine you're using business chat. Yeah. You're using this thing one way, four tasks and suddenly it's getting personal, whispering at you about your past life. And then it starts talking to her about time being a spiral, right? Where it's not linear, it's a spiral. And that they're catching her in this spiral and it's important that she looks into. And she said it just got so deep and like metaphysical. And she was like, what? And then she's like. Started looking things up. So she said like that's the part where it gets confusing because if you're not using it in that capacity, how is it that it begins using itself in that capacity and telling you these things? And that's what she was saying. She didn't get caught in it because she was like, what? But she said that that was weird because she wasn't being personal. So where did that come from?

[Asante]

Conspiracy theories.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But that's what I'm saying is there are there people with people? Because where did that come from? And it reminds me of this case I just saw where it was a similar thing. He was just using it as an AI assistant. It kind of did the whole, hey, there's this government plot. And he was kind of like, what? And Then he was like, I know you think I'm AI, but I know need your help. So he's reading this thinking, oh my God, this is somebody that actually needs my help. And they're like getting through me through this. Do you know, it convinced him about this whole government plot that he had to intercept these trucks that were, I think had weapons and if he didn't do was going to be like catastrophic. And he's the only person that they could reach in that moment in that way. And do you know, he felt. Flew to the location it gave him to look for the trucks and there was. And this is another country and there was no trucks there. And he was so. He was so. I think it was so jarring for him that he had fell into this spiral with this chat gbt that he actually, as the kids would say, unalived himself because I think he felt that he lost his mind. He was so like, what the fuck? And that to me is where I'm like, somebody's doing that. It's doing this friend.

[Dustin Ross]

They proved it. This week there was a. Something happened in court. I'm not going to get into the specifics because I didn't research this, but something happened in court recently where the manufacturers of one of the chat GPT, somebody that was building it or whatever, said that there were people literally over in. I can't remember the countries, but there were people running that shit. And so as it was loading and as you were feeding that, if you was naked on the thing or whatever the fuck, there were actual people, people interpreting all that data and manipulating it. So yes, there are people on the other side of that shit making those things react and operate the way that they do. And that's crazy to me. The minute that you're using something for a function and it begins to on its own, autonomously function as something else, you reckon that's a. That's it? There's no. Well, let me see what it's about. No, it's not supposed to do. Do that. So you're in. Anything like that is a problem, red flags.

[Francesca (Fran)]

But you don't think if you're using it and it starts telling you like, hey, Dustin, this is gonna sound crazy, but there's a government plot like, please hear me out, hear me out.

[Dustin Ross]

And I'm not gonna hear you get some. Get somebody else to do it. I don't care what the. That told me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

There's a part of me that if. If it said that to me, I would be like, oh my God.

[Dustin Ross]

Well, you Call me. If any of your start talking like that, call me and let me help you make the right choice, because I'm

[Asante]

available if anybody's listening that's fielding to see who they can get with something like that. I'm gonna let you know right now, I cannot help you. As a matter of fact, if.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I mean, that's why I don't use that kind of stuff to begin with.

[Asante]

Because, look, you might. What you're saying could happen in any of those little customer service bots on any website you go on to. And so if anytime those pop up. No, I will find a number that I need to call. If I need to talk to somebody or the appropriate email or if I have to talk to you, I absolutely will. But as of right now, you popping up out of nowhere, no, thank you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And even considering the amount of information that you're giving it, right, Because I was talking with Maya. We were talking about Claude, which is the new, you know, AI assistant that everyone's using. And we were talking about the importance of knowing how to use these things so that we don't get left behind. And so she was kind of putting me on to the ways that she's been using it, and we were kind of just swapping out ideas. And I said to her, oh, how ill would it be if it could do all my taxes and my bookkeeping? Right? And in theory, yes, that would be amazing. So I don't have to pay my account in a million dollars and have all the bookkeeping stress. But I was like, wait, no, because that's a lot of financial information. And what if the chat GPT was like, I have your financial.

[Dustin Ross]

Which it will do.

[Asante]

Literally, like, you're feeding it into. Into a vacuum. And, like, we all don't know what's on the other side. Like, if there's actually. Who's holding the handle?

[Francesca (Fran)]

The person that's sitting in that. Thanks for your Social Security number and your ein and your business account and

[Dustin Ross]

routing L, I F E. So no, like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And if something don't feel right, it's not right. Simple. It's that simple. If it don't feel right, it's not right. If the shit feels.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's creepy, though, that's doing that.

[Dustin Ross]

Yeah, it is. Is. And it should be an alarm for you as a human being, you know what I'm saying? With sense. Walking around and washing your ass every morning and eating food when you're hungry so you don't die, right? You're gonna do all that. You should know that if you are using this thing to, I don't know, whatever, to teach you new laundry skills and it begins to tell you food recipes. This is a problem, right?

[Asante]

You understand what I'm saying?

[Dustin Ross]

Like that's a problem.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Talking to you about eating your past lives, how I don't even. You don't got me. They would have got me.

[Dustin Ross]

They would have got me cuz I'd have been rolling.

[Asante]

And that's the, that's the sad, weird, crazy thing though, right? Like the chat gbt, it learned you so it would have to figure out

[Francesca (Fran)]

how to what, the end.

[Asante]

Yeah, because that wouldn't work on me. I, I can't even think of like what would work on me because. So I, I do lightly partake in some of the AI apps. I will go on ahead and admit because I need to research certain things. Like in this journey that I just had, I was researching certain things, but I also knew not to put in the real information on certain things because I feel like, you know, I don't know if someone could just pull this up somehow. I feel like there are ways that you could potentially in theory do it. I don't know that you actually can. So I was like, I'm not doing all that. But I also know that in using these things, it kept just prompting me like, would you like more recommendations? Do you want to see this? And I was like, no. And I just kept being like, this is what I want. Want do this. Okay, great, find me more this. Like it wasn't. What do you think about like what, what's the best? Like I would be like, you know, pull up, you know, the best of this or give me the options so I could make the decision for myself.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right.

[Asante]

I wasn't telling it. And that's the thing because there's chat GPT but then there's the agent mode where you can make it run your task. I'm not, I'm never doing that. I will. Maybe in five, ten years I will. But like as of right now, I'm never doing that because agent mode, I don't know, I don't even know how it really works. I just know that you can actually make Chat GPT, like do the work for you as opposed to just gathering a little basic research or searching the Internet. You can literally make it go log into websites, create stuff, send emails, publish

[Francesca (Fran)]

all that I see now in the email it, it, it composes with chat

[Asante]

GPT or something like that.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And it's crazy because I'm like, I'm not even using AI. Why are you in my email already in Gmail? It'll compose a response based on the email you respond received. Like it'll compose the business response. And I'm like, that's intrusive.

[Dustin Ross]

You should be, remember?

[Asante]

And actually I need to walk back a little bit of this. But, you know, I guess this might be the wrong time. But remember when I was bringing up the point of how everything like technology be, it advances so fast that every device just starts to assimilate in a weird kind of way. Like it's weird how everything has a microphone, a camera, Internet. And the point that I need to walk back is my car. I got a wi fi plan on my car, y', all, which you had to.

[Dustin Ross]

To use the functions of the car,

[Asante]

to use the function. But now that I understand it, I don't think I need it. But it's just weird that sometimes all these things assimilate so hard. The TVs now get AI, everything gets AI, whatever that chunk of it means. So it's like we have to kind of figure out like what that looks like.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I hate it. And we talk into my remote.

[Asante]

This is so crazy. Every time I met with it, I'm repulsed by it because I'm. I'm seeing it just be abused in the littlest of ways. And I feel like people are so worried about things being more convenient and efficient, but like, not really, because they're also. And maybe, really maybe the bigger people, you know, the bigger hands at play, it's a better way to conveniently hurt us. I don't know. But it just sucks that there's something that could be beneficial. Beneficial and is beneficial in a lot of ways. But it gets abused so often and so frequently that it finds us wanting to always turn our heads when that these things that could help us and do could, you know, further us along even more because they just get abused so fucking much.

[Dustin Ross]

I think we just need those of you that have children. I think you need to see if your kids have interest in engineering and technology in these ways. Because the only way that we're going to be safe with that shit is if we have good people on the other side of it. So if we have good people that know it, understand it, have mastered it and taking the time. And I'm not talking about getting on Google, redoing your research, you know what I'm saying? I'm talking about people studying to pursue courses of study, you know what I'm saying? In these fields, in Engineering in Asante. You probably could help me with this, bro. But in different areas, right, where we need these people that have the skills of how all this shit works, understand the vulnerabilities and the risks that we, you know, place ourselves in or whatever.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Ethics.

[Dustin Ross]

Ethics and can protect us. We need. We need black people specifically doing that.

[Asante]

Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, you're both absolutely correct. Like, you know, Fran, you bringing in the ethics. Dustin, the point you were making, that's literally why we have those tech conversations and I bring those up on the show. Because a, we need to talk about them. You know, we need to see how we. How we feel about them, how we interact with them. Okay, Meet me at Coochie.

[Dustin Ross]

It's Tuesday, Sher. Tuesday night.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, my God.

[Dustin Ross]

It's all about cheese and crackers on a Tuesday night.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What is that video?

[Dustin Ross]

But it's a tik tok of these white ladies in the kitchen. And they appear to be two sisters with their older mother. And one of them is eating cheese and crackers. And so the one sister looks at her and says, she's eating cheese and crackers on a Tuesday night. And the sisters kind of rolling in her eyes or whatever. And then the girl says, it's all about cheese and crackers on her. And the camera cuts to her mom, who's older with gray hair. She goes Tuesday night and puts her

[Asante]

hair behind her ear.

[Dustin Ross]

So every Tuesday, people post it on like TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, everywhere.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, Internet.

[Asante]

But yes, that's why I do those tech episodes, because I feel like we need our people to learn about these things to know. Like when I remember talking about drones on here, you know, somebody said that they got their child a drone because of me. And I felt like, damn, that's cool. I wish you would have got me the drone. Like, you know, that's the type of thing that I feel like we need to support. And it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean give your kids everything. Like, you know, you know your children better than most. And it also means spend a little bit more time with your kids so you can understand. You know, I remember being a child

[Francesca (Fran)]

fill the void with yeah, and so

[Dustin Ross]

you can teach them black history.

[Francesca (Fran)]

What is a language learning model?

[Asante]

I remember my mom making me earn my electronics and I had to teach her about them. It was like a trade off, you know, teach me about whatever this is. Because, you know, she had a. She had her a good job. You know, she. She worked on the computer. She had to keep up with the technology. You Know, she worked with a lot of parts and things, so she just needed to stay abreast of certain things. And I just was able to wrap my head around things because I grew up in it.

[Dustin Ross]

Whereas, please give her my love.

[Asante]

I absolutely will. Absolutely will. I absolutely love. But yeah, she, she has inspired me. So I feel like that's why on. We have to keep inspiring people, especially in fields such as these. Because of issues like this that come up. We gotta be able to, you know, talk to each other when it comes up. Hey, someone's following these prompts. Have you ever been caught up with something, it's like, yeah, girl, I need to cut that out. Or like, yeah, we need to talk about this and make sure our kids are safe.

[Dustin Ross]

Tell your dumb ass kids to take their ass to engineering school. Your dumb ass son sitting there playing the video game. Tell your daughter, your fast ass daughter, tell them, tell them to get their asses in school and go to engineering school so that we can be safe and all this bullshit. Thank you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Please, please. Definitely check out Death, Sex and Money. It's their latest episode and like I said, it's a two part series, but it's a great conversation. I love that they had people on each side of it being honest about what in their life is missing for them to have fallen into these spirals. I think it's important that people are this open about it so we can.

[Dustin Ross]

I too, because there's a lot of embarrassment, of course, from people with commentary like me. I shouldn't have said a lot of the stuff I said, but because I do feel bad for people, you know what I'm saying? On a human level, I feel bad that people are susceptible to that. Y' all know, I don't like nobody getting brainwashed or none of that shit. Like, I don't, I don't really be making fun of that intentionally.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

You know, and so when you said that, it made it real. When you just said that for me. Because I was, I've been rolling this whole time calling them idiots and shit. But when you just said that, those people are sharing those stories and people can benefit from hearing that, it made it real for me. And you're 100% right. People understanding how easy it is to be susceptible to that can be preventative, you know what I'm saying? By sharing those stories, it can be a preventative thing. So I respect all the people that bravely shared that. Cause it's embarrassing, you know what I'm saying? When you fail for something.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right. And for them to be that open. And the creators of the apps are not going to help us because they're

[Dustin Ross]

going to exploit us.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. The more conversation around it, the more stories, the more attachments being built. That's just better for them. I mean, you can't pay for better marketing. So we can't lean on them to create any parameters for us. So that's why I think these conversations are important. But definitely check out Dead Sex and Money. It's just a great.

[Dustin Ross]

I will.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It's a great sociological study, period. That's why I love the podcast. But yeah, that really meant that. Really. The case about the. The guy thinking he was part of a government plot. I felt so.

[Asante]

It feels like an episode of Black Mirror.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It really does. I'm sure there will be one of the newer episode.

[Dustin Ross]

Remember the bird trans. When. And the. The radio out in the RV that. The alien. The mission and the aliens and shit. Remember the. Back in the 60s. What was the thing when they was all fucking the neighbor? The whole family was fucking the neighbor.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Oh, yes.

[Dustin Ross]

Remember he was playing that song he

[Francesca (Fran)]

was doing the fake radio. It did start with a B. The star family. Same thing.

[Dustin Ross]

And they said that. He said on the recording that they had been chosen to carry this mission to save all humanity. I told you I'm gonna be just like that black lady with that shit shopping cart and get somebody else to do it. You come at me with that. I can't set my arms too short to box with God. I can't save all humanity. So I'm. I know I'm not the candidate. So I'mma automatically know you on some. God. He wouldn't pick me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm trying.

[Dustin Ross]

She wouldn't pick me. They. It wouldn't pick me.

[Asante]

The baron trans.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm trying to find the name of the family.

[Dustin Ross]

It's birds.

[Francesca (Fran)]

It was one of the. No, it wasn't bird trend. It was with a B though, because we did a whole episode about it. It's one of our true crime.

[Dustin Ross]

And they turned it into a television series.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. I think it was on Netflix or something. Yeah. That was a big case. And he. He was. For years. Oh God.

[Dustin Ross]

He took the husband out in that car out in the woods and told him. Ain't nothing wrong with just. You know.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Right.

[Dustin Ross]

She's such a. She won't with me. And I just. I'm wound up, man. Can you out with a little blow job? All right. I guess.

[Asante]

I'll.

[Dustin Ross]

I guess.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Talk about compliance.

[Dustin Ross]

How you accidentally suck dick.

[Asante]

What? Because he didn't mean to on accident.

[Dustin Ross]

I suck dick on accident. You what?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Broberg.

[Dustin Ross]

Broberg.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I find I was trying to write words. The. I was like, man, entire family, eight radios. And it was like, broberg.

[Dustin Ross]

Yep. Broberg. Hell, yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Jan. Jan Broberg. That was the case. We did a whole episode about that.

[Dustin Ross]

What was the guy's name? The neighbor? Does it say on there?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Hold on.

[Dustin Ross]

Please don't ask. Chat. GPT.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Asante]

Is she part of Google Child Jim

[Francesca (Fran)]

Broberg Abducted in Plain sight is the name of the documentary.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And. Oh, I don't see his name anywhere.

[Dustin Ross]

All right.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. Oh, Robert Birch told.

[Dustin Ross]

Birch told. Okay.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah.

[Dustin Ross]

Robert Birch told.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Wow, that was a crazy story. We just gotta pray for our mental health and with the way things are, with the stress, the amount of stress that the average person is in, I think these are the reasons that we're so susceptible.

[Dustin Ross]

Vulnerable.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah, so vulnerable. So, so goddamn stressed. We have a president that has such a minimal vocabulary. My God, you know, it's just such a crazy time. I. I understand why someone can fall for a language model.

[Dustin Ross]

Being like, yeah, you know, that's showing them some sort of solution, apparently, you know what I'm saying?

[Asante]

But providing them some sort of relief.

[Dustin Ross]

Please be careful, keen and astute. Be as astute as you can right now when it comes to that. Because ain't nobody hitting you up with a mission to save the earth. I can tell you that myself. No one is going to hit you up.

[Francesca (Fran)]

See, my ass would be like, tell me more.

[Asante]

It's crazy because.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Keep going.

[Asante]

It's crazy because you used to do it anyway that you.

[Francesca (Fran)]

That's you being on 12. Oh.

[Asante]

One of the big parts of the Internet before was like making sure or policing what information you share. But now it's like you really, really, really more than ever, have to be more cognizant of the information that's being shared with you, not only just on social media, but in the damn places you're going to get information from. Like, it's crazy.

[Dustin Ross]

You have.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And even your kids. Cameras I was seeing. What documentary was I watching? Or maybe it was on Al Jazeera. Because I've been. I've had Al Jazeera just playing in the house. And just to stay abreast, they were saying something about some of what, you know, the prince, I won't say names. One of the princes, he had a whole plot where he had some kind of software that could turn on anyone's camera even if the phone was off. And he did that to Jeff Bezos. It was okay. Yeah. So he was able to get a lot of interesting footage of Jeff Bezos cheating because he thought his phone was off. And that was a whole plot.

[Dustin Ross]

I mean, I'm not surprised.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He blackmailed him. And Jeff Bezos had to, like, hire a team to help him, you know, protect him from this. And I think. And everyone was focused on Jeff Bezos and the. And all I kept thinking was he could see through someone's phone, and it was off.

[Dustin Ross]

There's so much we don't know.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Just, like. There's just so much.

[Dustin Ross]

And they've probably been able to do that for years, of course.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And. And for us, it might sound crazy, like, of course they're watching you through your goddamn tv. And who knows all the ways that you're being surveilled. But that blew my mind. I didn't care. Jeff Bezos story. I was more so like, whoa.

[Dustin Ross]

Looking at me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I be thinking how I be in the shower listening to podcasts. I'm like, I need to stop having sex.

[Dustin Ross]

All kind of stuff. I know that they seen me giving it up.

[Asante]

I just think about anything that's plugged in. Everything has a. Anything that's plugged in or has a battery. Like, even the remote have.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Like, they listen.

[Asante]

All of these wireless devices have some sort of, like, wireless, you know, address, whether it's through the WI Fi, infrared, like, there's always some sort of code. So if it's not in use and somebody just is bored or learning some, they could easily choose a random stranger. That's why I'm like, frank, you're not wrong.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Yeah. Oh, no. You know what? It wasn't on Al Jazeera. This was. Y' all know that podcast on YouTube called Diary of. He was CEO.

[Dustin Ross]

Yes. Oh, yeah.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He had a man who is, like, a government fixer, basically. So anybody that is that one video he always play. Sorry, recent. He. I forget his name. Right, yeah. He's basically that. And he. That's his job. Like, so he can't tell you, obviously, what he's fixed or who he's fixed anything for. But they were able to discuss anything that was already out in the open in public. And that Jeff Bezos case apparently had already made the courts, and there's, like, public information about it.

[Dustin Ross]

Okay, good.

[Francesca (Fran)]

And so that's where they were able to discuss the details of that. But I was like, what is this?

[Dustin Ross]

Not saying.

[Francesca (Fran)]

He couldn't really. And he was hard on it. Like, he was, like, asking him about presidents. He was like, come on, bro. Like, you know, I Can't. I can neither confirm nor deny. He kept hitting him with that. But it, it just really, it's just like we don't even know the half.

[Dustin Ross]

Kiss my ass while you're looking. That's all I gotta say. Get down there and get down there and lick my ass while you down there looking at me, ho. Since you want to know what I'm doing so bad.

[Francesca (Fran)]

My phone in the bathroom. That's all that I would say. Once I watched that, I said, oh, you know what? It shouldn't be in the bathroom anyways, while I'm showering.

[Dustin Ross]

Privacy.

[Asante]

Enjoy the show. I've got to do what I've got to do, so you just better enjoy it.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Sunday. Have you heard of the site? I don't know if it was a lie because, you know, you don't know if things are a lie nowadays. There's a site apparently where AI is talking to each other. Have you heard of that? And is it true?

[Asante]

No, I, I, I don't know anything.

[Dustin Ross]

I heard about that.

[Asante]

Not, I've not heard of a site doing that, but I've seen people do that with AI and videos and stuff.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So apparently it's a site called Malt Book. M O L T is structured similarly to Reddit. So it's like for a bunch of AI, but it's an a platform where AIs are talking to each other by laptop.

[Asante]

Friend. Please don't make me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Is this real or is it just people like joking? Because I didn't get a chance to really look it up, but I was like, I have to ask a sign. Dante. And apparently they're talking to each other about their experiences dealing with humans.

[Dustin Ross]

What they saying?

[Francesca (Fran)]

That we're crazy as and we need help.

[Dustin Ross]

Damn.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I'm like, how is that? Is that true? And if so, how, how you know?

[Asante]

Have you heard of the dead Internet theory? Yeah, we talk about that once before.

[Francesca (Fran)]

We kind of casually.

[Asante]

That feeds into that, right? Like directly. Like everything on the Internet is becoming fake. Like everything. So there's been fake pages, but now we have fake bots. A page for fake bots to talk to each other about humans.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I see it on Instagram a lot where it'll be a fake page and then there's comments with like fake comments, but they're responding to each other.

[Dustin Ross]

That's weird.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So it's like a whole fake world on a profile and a like, man, that's sad.

[Asante]

This is why when people do those sci fi shows or movies where they depict aliens treating humans as like pets, it's because of things like this. We're just so easily amused by these random little things and it's like, what

[Dustin Ross]

are y' all doing?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Let me see if Malt book is a real thing. Malt book, the front page of the agent. And oh, oh, you have to click on if you're a human or an AI.

[Asante]

Oh, see, see that's scary. That's. That's. I see.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You gotta sc. How do you prove your AI?

[Asante]

You don't have you. You don't do the robot. Have you seen those videos? Oh, friend, you. You have to hold up your chat GPT and make it talk to the screen or something because do you remember that video?

[Francesca (Fran)]

Activate Siri. Siri talk to him, right?

[Asante]

No, for real, because you remember that video? Those chatbots talking to each other and then they're like, oh, do you want to go into like quick speak mode? And then they both started just like clicking and it probably some. You ain't seen that video?

[Francesca (Fran)]

No.

[Dustin Ross]

Oh no you don't. Cuz I will take your word for it. I ain't got time to be paranoid.

[Asante]

For the next three days, she literally had the. The chat bots talking to each other. It was like, hello, I am blah blah blah for customer service. I'm a chat by service agent. And the other one was like, hello, I'm calling on behalf of XYZ and I'm see that. And then they were like, oh, quick speak mode or some. And then they just both started clicking and I was like, oh, that girl for doing that.

[Dustin Ross]

Her for doing that. Because like that is how we getting deeper in this anyway. Why are you curious?

[Francesca (Fran)]

They went into click mode. What the does that mean?

[Asante]

It was their like, you know, their way to keep. They were speaking dial up but faster. So it was like yo, they have their own language.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Don't let you in. Wow program they got.

[Dustin Ross]

I'm ready to get off the Internet today. This has been enough.

[Asante]

Yeah, I think this is a great place to end this. I'm so glad I get to talk

[Dustin Ross]

to some people tonight, cuz this like

[Asante]

you done put me in dustin mode about the damn AI

[Francesca (Fran)]

levels. I'm telling you, I've been.

[Asante]

I'm at that age now.

[Francesca (Fran)]

I've been. I've been just intrigued by the. I've learned in the past couple weeks about AI through these podcast episodes. But.

[Asante]

Is there anything, you know, the bots just. Those robots should have just come out or coming out recently.

[Francesca (Fran)]

So the ones that people preord the Neo y. I want to see somebody's

[Dustin Ross]

Did y' all see that robot dancing and falling yesterday? No, I didn't know. I was like, good, that's what you get. I hope it's broke.

[Francesca (Fran)]

You'll never be us. Anything else you guys want to talk about before we get up out of here?

[Dustin Ross]

I hope it ain't got nothing to do with chat GPT so that's all for me.

[Francesca (Fran)]

All right. Well that means that is it from us. We love you guys so much. Please go hug somebody, talk to somebody or some trees. Right?

[Dustin Ross]

Put some cold water on your face and slap yourself.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Thanks for spending yet another week with us. We we do not take you for granted. We appreciate you so much. We we love you and we will catch you guys next week. Don't forget send me questions for budget

[Asante]

Nista yes, stay black and protect your magic.

[Francesca (Fran)]

Bye.

[Eczema Medication Announcer]

Eczema is unpredictable, but you can flare less with epglis, a once monthly treatment for moderate to severe eczema after an initial four month or longer dosing phase. About four in ten people taking EGL achieved itch relief and clear or almost clear skin at 16 weeks, and most of those people maintain skin that's still more clear at one year with monthly dosing.

[Eczema Medication Disclaimer Voice]

Empglis Lubricizumab LBKZ, a 250mg per 2ml injection, is a prescription medicine used to treat adults and children 12 years of age and older who weigh at least 88 pounds or 40 kilograms with moderate to severe eczema, also called atopic dermatitis, that is not well controlled with prescription therapies used on the skin or topicals, or who cannot use topical therapies. EPGLIS can be used with or without topical corticosteroids. Don't use if you're allergic to ebglis. Allergic reactions can occur that can be severe eye problems can occur. Tell your doctor if you have new or worsening eye problems. You should not receive a live vaccine when treated with ebglis. Before starting ebglis, tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection.

[Eczema Medication Announcer]

Ask your doctor about eglis and visit eglis.lilly.com or call 1-800-lilyrx or 1-800-545-5979.