Anyone Can Play, Anyone Can Win (Cornholing with Michelle Hastie Thompson)

Summary

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos
Episode Title: Anyone Can Play, Anyone Can Win (Cornholing with Michelle Hastie Thompson)
Host/Author: Pushkin Industries
Release Date: July 14, 2025

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Introduction

In this compelling episode of The Happiness Lab, Dr. Laurie Santos explores an unconventional yet powerful tool for enhancing happiness and building community: cornhole. Joined by professional cornhole announcer and Psychology PhD student Michelle Hasty Thompson, the discussion delves into how this simple lawn game transcends mere recreation to become a therapeutic and community-building activity.

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Michelle's Story: From Fire to Coping through Cornhole

The episode opens with Michelle recounting a harrowing experience during the Camp Fire in Paradise, California—a tragic event that stands as the deadliest and most destructive wildfire in the state's history. On the morning of November 2018, Michelle found herself alone at home with her young son and two dogs as the fire rapidly engulfed her town.

[02:30] Michelle Thompson: "I don't know, I don't feel safe. I'm just going to take Roem and the dogs and get out of here."

Michelle's quick thinking allowed her to escape the disaster, but the aftermath was devastating. She and her family lost everything—homes, belongings, and their sense of community. Amidst the turmoil of rebuilding their lives, Michelle sought an unexpected source of solace: cornhole.

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The Psychological Benefits of Cornhole

Michelle's journey with cornhole began as a way to reconnect with herself and others after the fire. What started as casual backyard play evolved into a profound tool for mental well-being.

1. Stress Relief through Fun and Play

Michelle emphasizes the importance of fun as a stress remedy, contrasting it with less healthy habits like mindless scrolling.

[16:40] Michelle Thompson: "Instead of focusing on every calorie you burn and everything you eat and what your body looks like, you're going into a room with people and you're just having fun on a Wednesday night."

2. Promoting Presence and Mindfulness

Cornhole requires players to be present—a state of mindfulness that can counteract the incessant negative self-talk that hampers performance and happiness.

[19:23] Michelle Thompson: "You cannot play your best game if you're not present."

3. Overcoming Cognitive Distortions

The game serves as a practical exercise in recognizing and combating cognitive distortions—irrational negative thoughts that can lead to anxiety and stress.

[20:33] Michelle Thompson: "Don't make meaning out of it. Because even our top pros don't make every bag in the hole every game."

4. Fostering a Growth Mindset

Cornhole encourages a growth mindset, where players recognize that improvement is possible through practice and effort.

[23:20] Michelle Thompson: "If you can get better, then you can get to a point where at least I can compete with the people in this room."

5. Healthy Competition

The sport offers a healthy competitive environment that channels competitive instincts positively, preventing them from spilling over into toxic behaviors.

[24:02] Michelle Thompson: "It's easy to keep it to that space... where it's easy to channel all that [competitive energy] there if I want."

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Building Community and Social Connections

Beyond individual psychological benefits, cornhole plays a significant role in building and strengthening communities.

1. Inclusivity and Belonging

Cornhole’s low barriers to entry make it an inclusive activity, welcoming individuals of all ages, backgrounds, and physical abilities.

[33:34] Michelle Thompson: "Literally anybody can play. So we have, for example, under 18 players competing in the pro field against adults. We've seen players throw on crutches. We have players with no arms who throw with their feet."

2. Real-life Examples

Michelle shares heartfelt stories illustrating the game's impact, such as a teenager who found a sense of belonging and improved his relationship with his father through cornhole.

[30:31] Michelle Thompson: "He pulled my husband aside and he told him that cornhole saved his life."

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Conclusion and Takeaways

Dr. Laurie Santos and Michelle Hasty Thompson wrap up the episode by highlighting key lessons:

1. Have Fun: Engage in activities that bring genuine joy to alleviate stress.
2. Challenge Negative Thoughts: Recognize and counteract cognitive distortions to improve mental health.
3. Celebrate Growth: Acknowledge and celebrate personal improvements, no matter how small.
4. Find Your Third Place: Establish a community space outside of work and home to build meaningful relationships.

Michelle encourages listeners to try cornhole or find another engaging hobby that fosters connection and personal growth.

[36:37] Michelle Thompson: "Whatever it is, try to carve out time each week to show up and get to know someone new."

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Final Thoughts

This episode of The Happiness Lab underscores the profound impact that simple, inclusive activities like cornhole can have on individual happiness and community well-being. By blending personal narrative with psychological insights, Dr. Laurie Santos and Michelle Hasty Thompson illustrate how turning to play and connection can be transformative, especially in the face of adversity.

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Notable Quotes:

• Michelle Thompson [19:23]: "You cannot play your best game if you're not present."
• Michelle Thompson [23:20]: "If you can get better, then you can get to a point where at least I can compete with the people in this room."
• Michelle Thompson [30:31]: "He told him that cornhole saved his life."

Transcript

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

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[Michelle Thompson]

In Northern California, fires are fairly common.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

This is psychology PhD student Michelle Hasty Thompson.

[Michelle Thompson]

And and so when I heard that there was a fire, it didn't seem that close. And so it was nothing that caused me any concern. It's like, oh, okay, another fire, whatever. That's what we do here.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

But Michelle's calm attitude on that fateful November morning in 2018 wouldn't last. She was getting her son Roem ready for his usual daycare drop off when she noticed that the sky was a bit darker than usual. With her husband already at work on the other side of town, Michelle called to compare notes and figure out how concerned they should be.

[Michelle Thompson]

You know, do I need to evacuate? Is this serious? He said, no, on my way to you. You stay there. Fire is on this side of the town, so you're fine.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

But then Michelle got an unexpected notification. Her son's daycare was closing for the day because of the fire.

[Michelle Thompson]

I was like, well, this must be serious if the daycare close. And then I looked outside. It was about 9am and it was black as midnight. I mean there was no light in the whole sky and it was eerily quiet.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Home alone with her two dogs and a young toddler, Michelle began to panic.

[Michelle Thompson]

And all I could hear was propane tanks exploding. But there was no sirens, there was no evacuation warnings, there was no text coming through, there was no communication as to what was going on. But my body kind of said, you need to go.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

She called her husband back and he's.

[Michelle Thompson]

Like, I'm on my way. I said, I don't know, I don't feel safe. I'm just going to take Rome and the dogs and get out of here. And so he said just, you know, grab the contents of the safe and grab some of my paintings because he's an artist and that is literally all I grabbed, nothing else and I got out of there as quickly as possible. It was very scary.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Michelle corralled the dogs into the car, buckled in her son and began driving out of town.

[Michelle Thompson]

I'm at the bottom of the town and I looked up and it was just straight cars as far as you can see. My sister in law was only 30 minutes behind me and she sent me a picture and the fire was on the road. What I just drove on, traveling that quickly. Turns out the fire completely trapped everybody in the town. So I was very lucky to get out when I did.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

The fire would later become known as the camp fire, the deadliest and most destructive wildfire in California history. It burned for two weeks straight, destroying nearly all of Michelle's town of Paradise, California. More than 50,000 people were displaced and over 80 people lost their lives.

[Michelle Thompson]

I got out and I was safe, but my husband and my in laws were all trapped all day. I had no idea if they were going to make it out. Luckily everybody did and we were all safe. But we did lose everything. We lost all of our homes. We were renters, so no insurance because they don't give you insurance in fire towns. And it was a really difficult process to rebuild from that.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

How do you cope when you and all your family and friends have lost everything? When the town that you loved and called home is now gone? When you need to start life over and build a totally new community from scratch, would you turn to religion or philosophy? Well, Michelle turned to an unexpected solution, one that she knew could help her find connection and community during this tough time. What was Michelle's unexpected coping mechanism? Well, it was cornhole. Yes, you heard that right. Cornhole.

[Michelle Thompson]

Beanbag. Toss.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Beanbag toss. Okay. Yeah. And so it really is like, there's a board with a hole, and you're trying to get the beanbag in the hole.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yep.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Michelle, who goes by the Instagram handle of cornholemesh, is more than just a fan of cornhole. The lawn game is also the topic of her Psychology PhD dissertation. In her thesis, Michelle argues that cornhole is a surprisingly powerful way to create connection and community, a benefit she experienced firsthand long before she lost everything in that paradise fire.

[Michelle Thompson]

Cornhole was the thing. Like, our garage was open. Everybody came over, we threw bags.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Cornhole was Michelle and her husband's go to activity for bonding with old friends and connecting with new ones.

[Michelle Thompson]

It just breaks the ice. You're not just sitting, staring at each other, hoping conversation comes up. And so it made it easy to kind of invite people, hey, you want to come over and throw some bags? And so I've really found it to be that sort of connector in all different aspects in life.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

And so, with a new home to settle into, a new routine to adjust to, and a new community to get to know, Michelle and her husband knew they could rely on this one familiar tool.

[Michelle Thompson]

We built new boards and got some bags, and then when we would be out, we would invite people to come play cornhole with us. And then ultimately, we decided to start our own club because there wasn't one in our county.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Turns out Michelle wasn't the only person in the area who was stoked about cornhole.

[Michelle Thompson]

Our very first night of our very first cornhole club, where we don't have a big community here that we know, we had 60 people. We were like, whoa, that's a lot of people that came, and they don't even know who we are. We built that club up to over a hundred people on a Wednesday night weekly. So it got really big, and it created this entire family. We definitely felt like we had our people very quickly after a very tragic situation where we completely lost everything. And it would be really easy to get stuck in that and isolate yourself and just feel like, why did this happen to me? And why was my town taken? And why was my community taken? And it was easy just to go, okay, well, this is our new friends, our new family, our new community, and.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

We'Re thriving, all thanks to an outdoor game with a goofy name. But is tossing beanbags really all that different from any other social activity? Michelle certainly thinks so. And in this final episode of the Happiness Lab season on creative ways to cope, we'll find out why. If you've Ever been to a backyard barbecue or college tailgate? You might already know how Cornhole works. But for those of you who haven't, here's a quick rundown. The game involves a pair of wooden boards, each with a circular hole near the top, and a set of four square beanbags. The rules are simple. Toss a bag toward the board, aim for the hole, and score points if the bag lands on the board, or even better, if it falls through the hole. The name Cornhole comes from what used to fill the bags. Yes, back in the day, it was dried corn kernels.

[Michelle Thompson]

I don't know if they still sell them like that, but they did when we first started. We would leave them outside and the rats would eat them and we had to keep replacing them over and over and over. It was a whole thing.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

The origin story of Cornhole is still hotly debated.

[Michelle Thompson]

There are so many stories, I honestly have no idea which one is true.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

One popular theory traces cornhole back to 14th century Germany. Some even suggest the game's roots go all the way back to antiquity. But the version of Cornhole we know today seems to have emerged from Cincinnati, Ohio, in the mid-1900s.

[Michelle Thompson]

You're going to find it in the places that have a lot of land and maybe not a lot of stuff to do.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Michelle's entry into the sport that would later change her life started off unremarkably enough.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah, I think I started just like everybody else at someone's backyard, just at a barbecue or a party, and never really thought much of it because I was horrible. So you don't think, oh, I'm gonna, like, make this my career. It's just this fun thing that you do, right? And I didn't really get into it until my husband was really into it. And I realized if I didn't start playing, I was never gonna see him. So that's when I actually started competing, was to connect with him. And also it was something to do in that sort of elusive 5 to 8pm Right? Like after work, you just mostly would watch TV or something like that, but he would wanna go outside and throw bags. And it got us in that, you know, side by side type of configuration to have conversation. So that was a way that we really connected.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

At first, Michelle just played casually, but a few tips from her spouse got her thinking more competitively.

[Michelle Thompson]

And I saw an instant change in my results. And I thought, wow, if I can see an improvement that quickly with a little tweak, that means I might actually be able to get good at this.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

And it turns out Some people are really good at cornhole.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

One of the things I did not realize, embarrassingly, maybe until I get interested in your work, is that this isn't just like the kind of thing people do in their backyards. This is actually a professional sport.

[Michelle Thompson]

You're not alone.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

I'm. I'm not alone. Okay.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah. I travel all the time, so I always talk to people at the airport and they're like, I'm sorry, what? You're going to be on espn. Excuse me.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

The game started getting a lot of attention in 2020 for a rather obvious reason.

[Michelle Thompson]

So the boards are going to be 27ft apart. So it's quite a distance away. So this really sets it up to explode during COVID because it's naturally socially distanced. So it was one of the only sports on TV in 2020 for a period of time there, which is how it grew so fast. It was just the four players out there. And then you have your two broadcasters obviously set away, and that's the only people in the room, really.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

The big leagues of beanbags, as it were, are run by the acl, the American Cornhole League. ACL pro players earn sponsorships and compete in tournaments all over the world.

[Michelle Thompson]

What it elevates to that next level is when you start to see all the craziness these pros can do. They push, they cut, they roll, they air mail.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

For the uninitiated like me, these are all just advanced techniques for getting the bag into the hole.

[Michelle Thompson]

I mean, they block. And I think what's fun about the game in terms of a spectator is it does have defense. You can play an entire defensive game. You can just try to force your opponent to miss. And I think that's a fun way that the game gets really interesting to watch and you get to see all the different strategy.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

And Michelle was especially excited to help cornhole players master one particular aspect of strategy, the psychological side of the game.

[Michelle Thompson]

I did food psychology. I worked with the mental part of weight and food. So obviously, coming from the world of psychology, it didn't take long for me to realize that this was more mental than physical. Once you get past the initial mechanics, similar to golf, right, It's a slow paced game. And as you know, the more time you have to think, the more dangerous the mind can be. As opposed to a reactionary sport, right. You're playing football, basketball. There's no time to think. You completely rely on training. You don't have a choice. Well, as much as I tell my cornhole players to rely on their training, Their brain can take over and be like, well, I better make this bag. If I don't make this bag, it's going to be bad. I'm going to lose like all that stuff. So the mental perspective became really interesting to me and I basically started just applying the same things I was teaching people with weight and food to Cornhole. It's about presence, it's about mindfulness, it's about breathing, body awareness, your thinking, your limiting beliefs, all of that, all the things I taught there, I just brought over here.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

And so your path to taking part in the sport was not just sort of helping cornhole players play better. Using your psychology training, you also became a cornhole announcer.

[Michelle Thompson]

Tony steps up to the board. He looks like he's going to start off with a block. That's a perfect block right in front of the hole. It's funny because, you know, as a kid I did musical theater. As a seven year old, I wanted to be a singer that died quickly. But I definitely loved being in front of a microphone. So it's going to make it harder for Mark to be able to slide his bag in and could kick off.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Off right.

[Michelle Thompson]

Bag kicks off right. Tony should be able to clean this up. Get two. I like to perform like that's the theater geek in me still. And so I always saw myself being on a mic or in front of people. I like to speak things like that. Never did I think I'd be a commentator, but I had started a girls cornhole podcast and ACL heard it and then asked me to come on board because they needed a female voice. And that's kind of where it went from there. And sideline reporting came after that.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

It seems like you've become a bit of a big celebrity in a very tiny world.

[Michelle Thompson]

That's exactly it in a very small world.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

But Michelle got more than small world glory out of her love of the sport. When we get back from the break, we'll dig into the surprising psychological benefits of cornhole and why what looks like a simple lawn game might be the key to greater presence, play, and even self compassion. The happiness lab will be right back. With the summer in full swing, I feel that familiar urge to refresh my closet. But I'm trying not to waste money on pieces I'll only wear once or just for one season. That's where Quince comes in. Think 100% European linen tops starting at $30. Washable silk dresses and skirts and soft cotton sweaters you'll reach for again and again. The best part, everything with quints is half the cost of similar brands. By working directly with top artisans and cutting out the middleman, Quint's gives you luxury without the markup. And Quint only works with factories that use safe, ethical and responsible manufacturing practices. I recently bought Quince's tiered maxi dress made of 100% cotton, and it's my Go to Summer pick for every picnic and barbecue. It's comfy, stylish and light to beat the heat. Plus it even has pockets. Go to quince.com Happiness for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com Happiness to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.com Happiness the Happiness Lab is proudly sponsored by Amica Insurance. As Ameca says, empathy is our best policy. That's why they'll go above and beyond to tailor your insurance coverage to best fit your needs. Whether you're on the road at home or traveling along life's journey, their friendly and knowledgeable representatives will work with you to ensure you have the right coverage in place. Amica will provide you with peace of mind. Go to amica.com and get a quote today. Hey Happiness Lab listeners, if you're planning on taking a family trip to Orlando this summer to be transported to magical universes, well, you should know there's one portal you don't want to miss. Your portal to the original universe Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex, where they have flying dragons, too. It's about science where no spells are required. Walk beneath a towering Falcon 9 booster, touch a real moon rock, and come face to face with space shuttle Atlantis. You can even meet an astronaut. And get this our friends at Kennedy Space Center Visitor complex are offering $7 off admission with code happy7. Discover something real. A recent poll from the American Psychological association found that 76% of U.S. adults are so stressed that it's affecting their health, leading to things like headaches, fatigue, anxiety, depression and trouble sleeping. I know that when I hit a point of extreme stress, I just want to shut off my brain, and that's when I tend to reach for mindless scrolling, even though I know that it usually amplifies my stress rather than fixing it. But researchers have found that there's one powerful way to reduce stress that we often forget about. That stress remedy is simply having fun. Professional American Cornhole League announcer Cornhole Miche, aka Michelle Thompson, is writing her PhD dissertation on the psychological effects of cornhole, and fun is something that she thinks about a lot.

[Michelle Thompson]

So Going back to when I was in the wellness community, I would work with mostly middle aged women. And they came to me because they were struggling with weight and they had tried everything and nothing was working. They were eating healthy, they were moving, the weight wouldn't budge. And I would work with them. And I would immediately notice what was lacking was play, hobbies, social, all of that. It was like their life was just about maybe their families, their work, and the obsession with their bodies and being thinner and being fit. It's so easy to get sucked into that external world when you don't have all that passionate stuff happening. The soulful hobbies, if you will. But I didn't have a solution back then. I just knew they needed it. So that's why when I first started Cornhole, I was like, this is it. Instead of focusing on every calorie you burn and everything you eat and what your body looks like, you're going into a room with people and you're just having fun on a Wednesday night. Don't put all your energy into obsessing about your body. Go have some fun. Put all the energy to trying to throw the bag in the hole. Fly out there.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

It makes sense that Michelle made this connection. Psychologically speaking, the most effective fun activities tend to be ones that are social, a little physical, maybe a tad thrilling. Our usual mindless scrolling doesn't qualify as fun in any of these senses. And unlike screen time, true fun tends to get us out of our heads. That low stakes challenge of trying to land a beanbag into a hole can help us snap out of negative self talk. Michelle seemed so confident that Cornhole was the ultimate solution to stress. I had to check it out myself. My husband Mark and I drove to Burlington, Massachusetts, where the Boston Cornhole group was having their weekly tournament.

[Mark]

All right, look at this.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Oh, this is like where it's happening.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

There's a bunch of people here.

[Mark]

Yeah, I don't know about our chances.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Mark and I did end up playing. More on that later, but we also had the chance to speak with some of the local competitors. And a lot of them mentioned that stress relief was their main reason for showing up week after week. Some players even used Cornhole to cope with big life changes. Take one guy I spoke with, Matt. He started playing Cornhole after joining the military and moving very far away from home, all the way to Kuwait.

[Mark]

So I was deployed overseas with the army and the usl, ran Cornhole tournaments every Thursday. It was a great, like reliever. It's honestly probably what I look forward to every week. It was very hot. The boards were very sticky. It was like 130 degrees. So a little bit different plan back in New England, but. But yeah, that's how I got into it.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

So the stress relieving fun of the game is one big psychological benefit. But Michelle argues that cornhole can also make players more present.

[Michelle Thompson]

You cannot play your best game if you're not present. Probably my favorite part because I was a yoga teacher for many years now. Let's not beat around the bush. There is a component of cornhole that is connected to alcohol. I know we can't pretend that's not there. I know that's not the healthiest component of cornhole.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

I heard it's called throwing juice. Is this right?

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah, aiming juice.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Aiming juice. Aiming juice.

[Michelle Thompson]

That's what my co commentator calls it. So that's there. And I always tell people, look, the mindless state is going to be when you're consuming alcohol. And that's okay. That's what you want to do that night. And you don't care about throwing your best. You just want to have a few beers and throw bags. And that's the night you want. You can have that. But if you want to really compete, you cannot successfully do that if you are not in the flow or the play state. And both of those states require presence. You have to be in the body. You have to be aware of when your nervous system changes because it impacts your physiology. And when you're in a game, an accuracy game, if your physiology changes by a teeny tiny amount, your bag is going to go somewhere else, not center.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

You've also talked about how cornhole can be a way to practice being kinder to ourselves. What do you mean by that?

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah, as humans, we're sort of meaning making machines. So I use cornhole as a way to teach my players not to make so much meaning out of things. Because immediately what they do is they, let's say they miss a bag. Oh, that means I'm off. That means I'm horrible at this. Oh, that means I lost it. And so I've taught them, don't make meaning out of it. Because the truth is even our top pros don't make every bag in the hole every game. You're not going to make every bag in the hole. But once you make meaning out of it, well, that means I'm off. And then they can spiral. So if we can stop making meaning out of everything, we're going to play a lot better. And guess what? That's pretty helpful for life as Well.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

I got to see this helpful aspect of Cornhole firsthand because even with the addition of a little aiming juice, I was pretty bad. At my first Cornhole attempt, I played three rounds of games and hit the board like twice, which was embarrassing enough. But Cornhole tournaments aren't played solo. When you show up, you get randomly paired with another player. And my unfortunate first partner was George, who happened to be a very, very experienced player. As I continued to whiff shot after shot, my meaning making mind went into overdrive. It kept shaming me, saying that George was going to be pissed. But when I chatted with him afterwards, I learned that all that self criticism was completely unfounded. George, as it turns out, was totally chill about it.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Thanks for being my partner.

[Michelle Thompson]

Sure, no problem.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Do you have any comments on my cork?

[Michelle Thompson]

No, just, you know, it takes some practice and you know, like anything else, you gotta kind of feel like it's gonna go in as opposed to when you get too stressed. And I think it's very psychological.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Psychologists call these kinds of irrational thoughts cognitive distortions. Things like jumping to conclusions, catastrophizing, or all or nothing thinking. And when you're thinking distorted thoughts like these, it's very relieving to realize that your brain is lying to you. Eventually, I switched from George to other partners, and I continued to play like crap. But it quickly became clear that no one seemed to care about my performance as much as my inner critic did. And with that realization, I could finally relax and start having some fun. My husband had a similar takeaway.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

How'd you do?

[Mark]

Well, I won the game I played against you. It was bad, but other than that, I've had a great learning experience.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Oh, yeah.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Good.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

And so it's not just making meaning, though. We can also use Cornhole to kind of watch how we change over time. You've talked about how Cornhole really is a growth sport and that can help us promote something that we definitely know is good for happiness. This idea of a growth mindset. Like, I might not be perfect, but I'm getting better over time. I have time to improve. Is this something you've seen in the players that you've worked with?

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah. So if you come into the room and you think, I'm never gonna be good at this, then you're basically going to be set up for failure. Right. But then you walk into this room and every single person in the room says, I was there. That's how I threw too. You're good. You're fine. Hey, just try kind of doing this with your hand and you see those immediate changes and you realize, oh, my goodness, if I actually put time into this, I might actually get better. And if I can get better, then I can get to a point where at least I can compete with the people in this room. And I think as humans, we love that opportunity for quick growth.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

And this idea of competition, I think gets to another benefit of Cornhole, which is it's a kind of healthy way to exert our competition muscles a little bit.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah, definitely. I am someone who dreams big and dreams often. Maybe other entrepreneurs can relate to this. I was like, obsessive about competing in my business. How can it be better? I can get more clients, I can make more money. Like, just obsessive about it. But it can be very toxic and unhealthy for me to have a goal and then obsess about that goal so much that I can't be present, I can't be with my family. I can't stop thinking about achieving. And that is not a healthy place for my mind or my body or the people around me.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

But Cornhole is a spot where you can kind of get that kind of competition in a healthier way.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah. I think the reason why it works for Cornhole is because it's easy to keep it to that space, at least for me. So if it's a, you know, a Wednesday night and I'm playing in a competition, I can channel all that there if I want. And then when I get home, it's over.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

A healthy form of competition. A form of stress relief through play and fun. An evening activity that gets you outside and keeps you mindful and present. All of these features of Cornhole can offer a meaningful boost to our well being, especially when times are tough. But there's still one huge benefit of Cornhole that we haven't touched on. The one Michelle says matters most. We'll hear about that benefit, plus a few more takeaways from my own Cornhole Adventure when the Happiness Lab returns. The Happiness Lab is proudly sponsored by Amica Insurance. As Amica says, empathy is our best policy. That's why they'll go above and beyond to tailor your insurance coverage to best fit your needs. Whether you're on the road, at home or traveling along life's journey, their friendly and knowledgeable representatives will work with you to ensure you have the right coverage in place. Amica will provide you with peace of mind. Go to ameca.com and get a quote today. Hey, Happiness Lab listeners, if you're planning on taking a family trip to Orlando this summer to be transported to magical universes. Well, you should know there's one portal you don't want to miss. Your portal to the original universe. Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex, where they have flying dragons too. It's about science where no spells are required. Walk beneath a towering Falcon 9 booster, touch a real moon rock, and come face to face with Space shuttle Atlantis. You can even meet an astronaut. And get this, our friends at Kennedy Space Center Visitor complex are offering $7 off admission with code happy7. Discover something real one of the things that gives me joy every summer is growing a few pots of mini pumpkins on my side porch. I'm no gardener, but I'm always looking for good ways to help my baby pumpkins thrive. And that's why I was so excited to hear about Mill. Mill is an effortless, odorless food recycler. What's a food recycler, you ask? Well, you know all those food scraps you toss into the garbage every time you cook? Or that random carton of takeout that's been in your fridge forever that you kind of need to toss out but you know it's going to be stinky? Well, with Mill, you can take all that dead food and turn it into something that's good for the planet and for pumpkins. Now that I have my own mill, I kinda love getting rid of all my scraps, and that gives me the joy of knowing that I'm not hurting the planet with my waste. Less guilt and more joy. But my favorite thing about Mill is that there's no smell like none at all. Mill makes it easy to do something good for the planet without the stink or the mess. Mill is the cleanest, easiest way to prevent food waste at home. It makes keeping food out of the trash as easy as dropping it in. Go to mill.comthl for $75 off a mill if you're a fan of the Happiness Lab, you've probably already heard that social connection is vital for happiness. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, a longitudinal study of human health and wellbeing that's been ongoing for 86 years, has found that strong relationships are the single biggest predictor of long term mental and physical health. Unfortunately, building those strong relationships in the modern world can feel pretty tough. But not if you show up at a cornhole tournament. When I visited that Boston cornhole group, I quickly realized just how easy it is to strike up a conversation with a total stranger when you're tossing bags right beside them. I mean, there's not a lot of.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Spaces right now where I could show.

[Michelle Thompson]

Up and just meet people, you know.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

From all over Massachusetts with all kinds of different backgrounds.

[Mark]

It's almost like networking, but you don't have to put the effort in because you're next to somebody, so you kind of are forced to do it Not. But not in a bad way, in a good way.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Just chatting.

[Mark]

You just chatting? Yeah, because you're next to each other for 10, 15 minutes at a time.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

I had more interesting conversations with more interesting people at cornhole than I'd had in a while, which made me especially surprised to hear that lots of the folks I spoke with at the event thought of themselves as introverts.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

This is my opponent who demolished me, ruined my score.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

I'm at the bottom of the.

[Michelle Thompson]

No, I'm too shy for something like this. Oh, you're too shy?

[Mark]

I'm sorry.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

But even after expressing his reserve, this player stuck around and chatted with me for a while. There's something about Cornhole that makes connecting with total strangers feel easier. Academic cornhole expert Michelle Thompson has seen this benefit play out across all kinds of players.

[Michelle Thompson]

Probably my favorite thing about Cornhole is the way that it connects people, But I didn't realize how powerful it could be. And there was a player, he was a teenager who would come to our club, and he was very shy, and he would come with his dad every single week. And in terms of the average Cornhole player, he didn't necessarily fit the mold of what you would expect. He was a little bit eccentric. And when he started playing, he got fairly good fairly quickly. And then he pulled my husband aside and he told him that cornhole saved his life. And the story that he shared was that he didn't have a lot of friends, and he wasn't super connected to his dad because they didn't have a lot of things in common. And when they started coming to this club, not only did he connect more with his father, he found this family that completely accepted him exactly as he was. It didn't matter that he's interested in other things that we are not interested. It didn't matter that everybody there was probably twice his age. None of that mattered. And now it's really fun to watch him because he's older now, so he's taken jobs out of town, and he'll come back and play whenever he's in town. And he's just a completely different person. He's 100% himself. It just seems like he's so comfortable in his skin, and that was not the way it was when he first started.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

And this seems in part because Cornhole is this unique sport when it comes to kind of connecting with other individuals. Talk about the ways that Cornhole uniquely allows us to connect.

[Michelle Thompson]

The way that most of these clubs set it up is it's a swap, which means you're randomly paired with four people and you play a game with each person. And so you have four different partners. That's four different connections that you build. And you're working together. Now you also have your opponent directly next to you that you're probably talking to as well. And so now you've met eight people, right? Your partners and these different opponents. And then you have a partner going into bracket and that's another person. Now you're playing multiple games with this person. So you build this relationship, this connection. Not to mention all the time in between games that you can connect with these people. So you have to make friends. Even if you're sort of shy and sit in the corner in between games, you have to play with and against someone every time you walk up to the board. And that to me is what makes it so special, is so much time to connect in an environment. And so many people have said, you know, I have social anxiety, I am uncomfortable in these environments. And it still works with Cornhole. They're able to overcome that.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

And it seems like being able to overcome that allows for something else to develop that's super good for happiness, which is this sense of community. Talk about the kind of community that gets built especially when people have Cornhole clubs.

[Michelle Thompson]

The community is like nothing I've ever seen. Once again, as someone who geeks out on psychology, this is the stuff that like I can't help but notice this community comes together for everybody. I mean, we've done cancer fundraisers, like someone who's in chemo and the people in the room don't even know the person. And they're more than willing to contribute to make this person have an easier time in that really tough time in their life. My brother in law unfortunately passed away a couple years ago unexpectedly. And the entire Cornhole, all the clubs in the area, came together to raise money for his kids. My nephew and my niece and my in laws showed up to this tournament and they were blown away at the amount of people that were in the room and how they were all coming together to support them and us. And I've just never seen anything like it.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

We know that doing nice things for other people and having these communities, like especially during really tough times can be so important, but so many of us just kind of lack this community, you know, so if something bad happens, we don't have anyone to support us. But it also means if other people are going through tough times, we don't have as obvious mechanisms to support them either. It seems like one of the things that Cornhole is doing is it's creating the kind of thing that the political scientist Robert Putnam talked about as a third place. Right. This place that's not home or work, where you can get together and form these relationships that cut across so many different things, but kind of become a really serious community in your life.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah. Not just locally. Local communities are super important. There's a lot of research on that, but I have found that it extends so far beyond the local. And I know that I could literally move anywhere in the US And I would have an instant family everywhere I go. And it makes it so that there's no fear. It's like we could move anywhere and we would have friends no matter where we go.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

This idea of a family, I think gets to another social benefit of Cornhole, it seems, which is that in a funny way, it really promotes belonging. The slogan of the American Cornhole League is anyone can play, anyone can win. Like, it's just a, like super inclusive sport.

[Michelle Thompson]

Yeah. That's another thing that's super unique about it is the inclusivity. Because the rule is just get the bag to the board. You don't have to be athletic, you don't have to have any experience playing any other sport. I've never played sports ever. So I'm a theater girl. Right. I had no athletic training and was able to pick up this game. The cool thing is, because it is a one pound bag, there's no limitations to who can play. So we have, for example, under 18 players competing in the pro field against adults. I've seen players throw on crutches. I mean, we have players that have no arms, throw with their feet. Dayton Weber is a quadruple amputee. He was a pro for many years. He's that good. So, I mean, what sport can you think of where a quadruple amputee will be competing with people with no disabilities at the same level? Literally anybody can play. So now all of a sudden you get to compete and there's no limitations or boundaries to that.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

It might seem cheesy, but I did get that feeling of inclusivity at the Boston Cornhole Tournament. There were people of all ages competing with totally different backgrounds, education levels, political affiliations, but everyone just seemed to get along.

[Michelle Thompson]

It has a different socioeconomic demographic than maybe some other sports. Right. A set of boards, you can get very inexpensive or you can make them yourself. And bags are very inexpensive if you don't want to go pro level, if you just want any bags to throw. And so it's just very easy to get started in it. And it doesn't have the same barriers that I would say, like, golf does. Right.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Several of the players I met in Burlington made the same point.

[Mark]

Matty G, who plays are usually here. What is he like?

[Michelle Thompson]

He's 14. 14.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

He's better.

[Mark]

He's like, one of the top players. And wait till he grows up and, like, gains some muscle and strength. But, yeah, all ages can play. All you need is some grass. But a lot cheaper than a set of golf clubs. For sure.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

For sure.

[Mark]

Yeah.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

Cornhole was starting to sound like the world's most ideal sport. But Michelle is willing to admit that, like everything else, it has its flaws.

[Michelle Thompson]

You know, it's not always perfect. I don't want to make it sound like every person that plays Cornhole is the best ever. Right. I work really hard to make sure that our club is inclusive and that we're so warm and welcoming to new players. And I know that a lot of club directors feel that same way because we want it to continue growing. We're all so nerdy about Cornhole that we want the entire world to play it with us. Because we're like, you're missing out. You got to get over here and play with us. It's too fun for you not to. We're trying to tell everybody we're screaming from the rooftops, come play Cornhole with us. I promise you're going to fall in love.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

What's some advice that people can use to get started if this discussion has piqued their interest in sort of being a Cornhole beginner?

[Michelle Thompson]

I hope it has. And if it has, whether you're going for a local tournament or you just want to get equipment, I definitely recommend the acl.com so you can put in where you live, and it'll show you all the different events there. There's also a forum called Addicted to Cornhole. And you can go in there and say, I live here. Is there any clubs nearby? You'll get tons of comments. It's an extremely active community, and obviously you can build your own boards if you want, you know, on a budget. And I've even seen people make their own bag. So, you know, whatever you got to do to get to get started, I'D recommend giving it a go. And it gets kids off screens, it gets couples playing together. It brings families together. It's a way to make friends because you could, like I said earlier, you can bring them over to your house. Let's throw some bags. It's an easy way to get started.

[Michelle Hasty Thompson]

I hope today's episode inspired you to give this lawn game a chance. My husband and I had such a blast at Boston Cornhole that we're planning to go back and we're hoping to bring some friends. If you're in the area, you should drop by. Just promise not to be annoyed if you get stuck with me as a partner. But if you're still not convinced that an elevated beanbag toss competition is for you, there's still plenty to take away from today's show. First, having fun is one of the most powerful tools we have for reducing stress. And doom scrolling doesn't count. Get outside with other people and do something that's a little thrilled thrilling. Second, try to recognize when cognitive distortions are holding you back and find ways to counter your inner critic. My throwing partner George wasn't mad at me for missing. And the people you're convinced are judging you, odds are they're not either. Third, acknowledge the little wins and celebrate your personal growth, whether that's small improvements with a new hobby or simply making it through an event that triggered your social anxiety. And finally, find a third place place, somewhere that's not work and not home, where you can spend time and build community. It doesn't have to be a Cornhole league in Burlington, Massachusetts. It could be a community theater, a yoga studio, or a Dungeons and Dragons group. Whatever it is, try to carve out time each week to show up and get to know someone new. This marks the end of our series on creative coping. And since it's summer and I've got a new game to play, the Happiness Lab will be taking a bit of a break. But not to worry because we'll be back in a few weeks with our next season of the Happiness lab with me, Dr. Laurie Santos. Hey, Happiness Lab listeners. If you're planning on taking a family trip to Orlando this summer to be transported to magical universes, well, you should know there's one portal you don't want to miss. Your portal to the original Universe Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex, where they have flying dragons, too. It's about science where no spells are required. Walk beneath a towering Falcon 9 booster, touch a real moon rock, and come face to face with Space shuttle Atlantis. You can even meet an astronaut. And get this, our friends at Kennedy Space Center Visitor complex are offering $7 off admission with code HAPPY7. Discover something real. American Military University is the number one provider of education to our military and veterans in the country. They offer something truly unique, special rates and grants for the entire family, making education affordable not just for those who serve, but also for their loved ones. If you have a military or veteran family member and are looking for affordable, high quality education, AMU is the place for you. Visit AMU Apus Edu Military to learn more. That's AMU Apus Edumilitary 1 of the things that gives me joy every summer is growing a few pots of mini pumpkins on my side porch. And that's why I was so excited to hear about Mill. Mill is an effortless, odorless food recycler. Well, you know all those food scraps you toss into the garbage every time you cook? Or that random carton of takeout that's been in your fridge forever that you kind of need to toss out, but you know it's going to be stinky? Well, with Mill, you can take all that dead food and turn it into something that's good for the planet and for pumpkins. Mill is the cleanest, easiest way to prevent food waste at home. It makes keeping food out of the trash as easy as dropping it in. Go to mill.comthl for $75 off a mill. This is an iHeart podcast.