Podcast
The Playbook
Hosted by Amanda Carroll · EN
Welcome to The Playbook — the no-BS podcast for successful women who are done wasting time on situationships, unavailable men, and “good on paper” guys who leave you bored out of your mind. If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe I’m too much, maybe there aren’t any good men left, maybe I should just settle…” — girl, stop lying to yourself. You’re not too much. He’s just not enough.
This season, we’re blowing up the old dating rules. No more waiting to be chosen. No more outsourcing your love life to matchmakers. No more pretending “fine” is good enough. High-value women don’t need a provider. We need a partner. And I’m giving you the exact playbook to attract one. Every week, I’ll drop savage truth bombs, scandalous stories, and the strategies that will get you into a committed, passionate, high-value relationship in 5 dates or less. Period. This is raw. This is real. This is where you stop auditioning and start doing the choosing.
19episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
How to Know If He’s the Right Man for You | The Choose Well Play
4d ago00:21:19Tap to summarizeHow do you know if he’s actually the right man for you—not just a man you have incredible chemistry with?Most women have been taught how to attract a man, keep his interest, and figure out whether he likes them. But very few of us were ever taught how to evaluate whether we should choose him.In this episode of The Playbook, Amanda Carroll teaches The Choose Well Play: a practical framework for evaluating whether the man you’re dating actually has what it takes to build a healthy, committed relationship with you.We’re talking about the four things that become more important—not less—with time: character, emotional stability, compatibility, and partnership capacity. You’ll learn why chemistry is information, not evidence; why his résumé isn't his character; why dating a man's potential can cost you years; and the one question Amanda wants you to start asking after every date.And if you've quietly stopped dating because you're exhausted by the apps, afraid of choosing wrong again, or starting to believe there simply aren't any good men left, this conversation is especially for you.You don't have to blindly trust your picker.You need a process you can trust while you rebuild trust in yourself.And if you want your love life to look different by the holidays, don't wait until November to start. Starting now gives you the time to meet men, gather evidence, walk away from the wrong ones, and allow the right relationship to develop without rushing it.IN THIS EPISODEYou'll learn:The difference between being chosen and choosing wellWhy chemistry can't tell you whether he'll make a good partnerThe four qualities to evaluate when deciding whether a man is right for youWhy successful men aren't necessarily relationship-ready menHow to stop falling in love with potentialWhy emotional stability matters so much in a long-term partnerHow to tell the difference between attraction and compatibilityWhy you don't have to make a good man into a villain to decide he's not right for youThe simple Choose Well Play you can run on your own dating historyThe one question to ask yourself after your next dateTHIS WEEK'S PLAYLook at your last three serious dating choices.First, write down what initially attracted you to each man.Then write down what eventually made each relationship unworkable.Put the two lists side by side.What were you selecting for compared with what ultimately determined whether the relationship worked?Then, after your next date, replace:“Does he like me?”with:“What did I learn about his character?”Start collecting evidence.🎯 READY TO STOP GUESSING? JOIN THE GAME PLAN — FREEIf this episode made you realize you've never actually been given a complete strategy for dating, I want to help you build one.Join me LIVE every Monday for my free training:THE GAME PLAN: How to Stop Wasting Years on the Wrong Men and Start Dating With Strategy I'll teach you the three plays of a real dating strategy—Clarity, Process, and Vetting—so you can see exactly where your dating strategy is working, where it's costing you time, and how to start making better decisions in weeks instead of years.Monday at 12 PM PT / 3 PM ET👉 SAVE YOUR FREE SEAT
Transcribe →The Biggest Dating Mistake Smart Women Don't Know They're Making | The Game Plan
1w ago00:36:43Tap to summarizeYou don't have a broken picker.You have a broken scorecard. After her divorce, Amanda Carroll became obsessed with one question: Why do smart women keep choosing the wrong partners?The answer surprised her.It wasn't a lack of intelligence.It wasn't bad luck.It wasn't that women were "too much."The real problem? Most of us were never taught how to evaluate character.In this episode you'll discover:• The biggest dating mistake almost every woman makes• Why chemistry isn't enough• The three personality traits research has linked to happier marriages• How to stop dating on hope• A practical play you can use immediatelyWhether you're newly divorced, healing from heartbreak, or simply tired of wasting time on the wrong relationships, this episode will help you begin dating with clarity instead of confusion.FREE TRAINING🎯 The Game PlanReserve your free seat here:https://amanda-pedone.lpcontent.net/FovJCAgsknConnect with AmandaInstagramhttps://www.instagram.com/amandacarrollofficialWebsitehttps://www.amandacarroll.orgCHAPTERS00:00 A gallon of milk changed everything02:47 Why your picker isn't broken07:36 The scorecard you inherited12:50 The research that predicts happy marriages16:42 Trait #1: Conscientiousness22:01 Trait #2: Emotional stability28:17 Trait #3: Openness to growth34:21 This week's Play38:02 Run the Play42:08 Join The Game Plan45:17 Final thoughts
Transcribe →Attachment Theory & Dating: Why You Don't Have to Be Healed to Find Love | The Begin Anyway Play
4w ago00:21:02Tap to summarizeYou've done the therapy. The journaling. The inner work. You've read the books, taken the courses, and you know your attachment style. And you've decided: you're not ready yet.Here's the problem. Six of the most important psychologists in history looked at that logic — and they all said the same thing.You're wrong.In this episode, I break down exactly what Winnicott, Rogers, Bowlby, Ainsworth, Jung, and Freud all concluded about healing and relationships. Six frameworks. Six eras. One unanimous answer: healing doesn't happen before relationships. It happens inside them.The strategy you're calling "self-awareness"? They'd call it avoidance. And the fact that it sounds so clean and responsible is exactly what makes it so hard to see.This episode is for the woman who has built an extraordinary life — and is somehow still watching it from the sidelines.What You'll Hear in This Episode[00:00] Why six of the most important psychologists in history all agree about your love life[02:15] The six frameworks, broken down — what each one actually says about waiting to be "ready"[08:30] "Fear in a very reasonable costume" — how to tell the difference between wisdom and a sophisticated avoidance strategy[11:00] The pattern that keeps pulling capable women toward emotionally unavailable men — and why it doesn't heal on the sidelines[13:00] The Begin Anyway Play: three steps, thirty minutes, one thing you'll do this week that isn't waiting[16:00] This week's listener challenge — finish this sentence and send it to meThe Six PsychologistsDonald Winnicott (Object Relations Theory) — You don't need to be fully healed. You need to be real, held in a "good enough" relationship.Carl Rogers (Humanistic Psychology) — Being accepted as you are isn't the reward for healing. It's what causes it.John Bowlby (Attachment Theory) — Waiting to be completely healed may deny you the very environment healing requires.Mary Ainsworth (Attachment Theory) — Healing happens inside safe, corrective relationships. Not before them.Carl Jung (Jungian Psychology) — Without relationships, parts of yourself may remain permanently unseen.Sigmund Freud (Psychodynamic Theory) — You don't wait to be healed. You discover what needs healing through relationships.Free Masterclass — This WednesdayThe 90-Day Playbook: How Successful Women Meet a Committed, Equal Partner Without Wasting Years on the AppsOne hour. The exact strategy my clients use — including the four-step commitment-ready filter that tells you what you need to know about a man early, before you've spent months finding out the hard way.📅 Wednesday · 6PM CT / 7PM ET · Live on Zoom 👉 Save your seat → The 90-Day PlaybookCan't make it live? Register anyway — I'll send you the replay.Connect With Amanda📸 Instagram: @therealamandacarroll🌐 Website: www.amandacarroll.orgIf this episode hit home, share it with one woman in your life who needs to hear it. You know exactly who she is.And if you're not subscribed yet — do it now. A new play drops every week.
Transcribe →Swearing Off Men Won't Save You. This Will. | The New Blueprint Play
Jul 700:23:41Tap to summarize"I'm done with men. I can provide for myself. What would a husband even add?"If you've said it — or quietly felt it — this episode is for you. Amanda Carroll names what's actually keeping high-value women single (it isn't you, and it isn't the men), puts the research on the table — including why the old "he leads, she follows" model is 7.4x more likely to end in divorce — and hands you The New Blueprint Play: the twenty-minute exercise that turns "I'm done dating" into "I'm finally in charge of it."Because you didn't give up on love. You gave up on the only version of it anyone ever showed you. And those are not the same thing.In this episode:The calm, four-word sentence high-achieving single women keep saying about men — and what's really underneath itWhy you're not "too much" or "too picky" — you're running a dating model that was built to failWhy the old blueprint was a hierarchy with a wedding cake on topThe research: relationships where he makes the decisions are 7.4x more likely to end in divorce — even when he consults her firstThe twist that recasts everything — the "traditional" couples that actually work are partnerships in disguiseWhy your standards were never the problem — the design wasThe truth that changes your dating life: attracting the right man is a skill, not luckThe New Blueprint Play — the three-step exercise you can run in twenty minutesResearch referenced:Sheila Wray Gregoire — Bare Marriage / The Great Sex Rescue, survey of 20,000 women on marital and sexual satisfactionSheila & Dr. Keith Gregoire — The Marriage You Want, on what actually builds intimacy beyond gender rolesDr. John Gottman — research on shared power and divorce predictionFree training + resources:🎯 Magnetic Attraction — my free live training on becoming the woman a commitment-ready man moves toward, on purpose: https://www.bravesinglemoms.com/pl/2148731615📋 4 Keys to Vetting a Commitment-Ready Man: https://www.bravesinglemoms.com/pl/2148725052📞 Free Dating Strategy Call: https://calendly.com/d/cn4j-kd2-5g5
Transcribe →How to Stop Giving Second Chances to Men Who Were Never Good Enough for You | The Love Audit
Jun 3000:42:23Tap to summarizeYou audit everything else that matters — your numbers, your team, your health. So why is your love life the one place you keep blaming the apps, the city, and "no good men"? In this episode, Amanda runs a live love audit with her client Kate: a four-part walkthrough of the patterns, filters, and quiet standard-slips that keep smart women stuck in talking stages that go nowhere. By the end, you'll have a standards reset and a seven-day plan to run the play yourself.Key TakeawaysWhy the problem isn't the apps, your city, or a shortage of good men — it's the strategy you've been dating withoutThe CEO shift: slow to hire, fast to fire, never rehire — and how to apply it to your love lifeHow to require clarity early instead of chasing it for monthsThe three places you're over-giving, and how to match a man's effort instead of out-running itA standards reset you can write down today, plus a seven-day action planChapters00:00 — What a love audit is (and why you stop blaming everything else)02:25 — Audit 1: Your patterns — the last three men and how they made you feel09:30 — The red flag women normalize, and why you fire fast11:00 — Audit 2: Your filters and the CEO shift17:00 — "I'm looking for a relationship, not a pen pal" — slow to hire, fast to fire24:56 — Audit 3: Energy and behavior — over-giving, chasing clarity, abandoning standards37:00 — There's no shortage of good men. You're ignoring the ones who show up.38:30 — Audit 4: Your standards reset41:30 — Your seven-day action plan44:00 — Listener Q&A: attraction, leading someone on, and calling it soonerLinks🧲 Free training — Magnetic Attraction: set up a dating profile that only attracts high-value men → https://www.bravesinglemoms.com/pl/2148731615📞 Book your personal Love Audit with Amanda → https://calendly.com/d/cn4j-kd2-5g5Subscribe, follow, and leave a review so more women can find the show.
Transcribe →Why You're Still Guessing at the One Thing You Want Most | The Strategy Over Hope Play
Jun 1700:18:53Tap to summarizeYou are the most strategic woman in every room — and somehow, your love life has been the one place you forgot to bring a plan. In this episode, Amanda Carroll breaks down the Strategy Over Hope play: why high-achieving women default to hope in dating, where that rule came from, and exactly how to replace it with the same framework you've used to build everything else.Key Takeaways:The unspoken rule that taught you to leave love to chance — and why it's costing youWhy "staying open" is not a strategy, it's being undirectedThe three things that replace hope with a real framework: Clarity, Process, and VettingThe three-step play you can run this weekLinks:🎯 Win at Dating Challenge (June 23–25, live with Amanda): https://amanda-pedone.lpcontent.net/fO9M0JrFzZ📋 Free Dating Profile Cheat Sheet: https://www.bravesinglemoms.com/pl/2148446153📞 Free Dating Strategy Call Subscribe, follow, and leave a review so more women can find the show.
Transcribe →Stop Overanalyzing Men: You’re Pushing Him Away | Mr. Rogers Play
May 500:18:26Tap to summarizeYou think you’re being smart on dates.Careful. Observant. Protecting your time.But what if the very thing you believe is keeping you safe…is actually the reason nothing is working?In this episode of The High Value Woman’s Playbook, Amanda Carroll breaks down the pattern that’s quietly sabotaging your dating life:👉 Overanalyzing men before you even meet them👉 Looking for red flags instead of connection👉 Turning every interaction into a testAnd without realizing it…You’re pushing good men away before they ever get the chance to know you.🎯 The Play: Mr. Rogers PlayInstead of dating like a prosecutor building a case…You’ll learn how to show up:WarmCuriousFully presentWith zero attachment to the outcome👉 Your only job on a first date:See if you enjoy being around him.💡 In This Episode:Why overanalyzing is killing attractionThe “friend test” that replaces overthinkingWhen to use discernment (and when it backfires)How to create real connection on a first date📞 Ready to Do This Differently?Book your free dating strategy call and get a personalized plan:👉 https://singlemomcollective.lpages.co/dating-strategy-call/💌 Want Better Matches?Download the Free Dating Profile Cheat Sheet:👉 https://www.bravesinglemoms.com/pl/2148446153📲 Share This EpisodeSend this to the woman who’s overthinking everything and ready for a different result.
Transcribe →Why You Keep Attracting the Wrong Man — And How to Finally Stop | The Sasha Fierce Play
Apr 2800:22:38Tap to summarizeYou are not broken. You are not bad at dating. You are dating as the wrong version of yourself.And after this episode — that changes.In this episode of The High Value Woman's Playbook, I'm giving you The Sasha Fierce Play — the exact exercise I run with every single one of my VIP coaching clients that finally breaks the pattern of attracting the same man in a different body.You're going to discover why the little girl inside you has been making your biggest adult decisions — and how to gently, powerfully take the wheel back.You're going to meet Grace, who spent 38 years giving her inner child what she needed — and is now learning to date as the woman she has become.And you're going to walk away with a real play to run today. Not someday. Today.Because the healed version of you — your Sasha Fierce — she already exists. She's just been waiting for permission.This is that permission.🎯 Run The Play: → Book your free Dating Strategy Call: → CLICK HERE Download the free Dating Profile Cheat Sheet: CLICK HERE⏱️ Highlights:Why Beyoncé's Sasha Fierce is more than an alter ego — and what she has to do with your dating lifeThe 8-Year-Old Self Exercise that reveals whose story you've been living inWhy smart, successful, self-aware women still end up in the same patternsHow to create YOUR alter ego and deploy her before every date"We do not date potential. We date fully potent."📩 Connect with Amanda: → Email: amanda@amandacarroll.org → Instagram: @amandacarroll → Website: amandacarroll.orgIf this episode hit home — send it to a woman who needs to hear it. That's how we change what's possible together.Subscribe. Follow. Leave a review. Go run your play.
Transcribe →How to Spot Red Flags, Green Flags & Find Your Equal | The Match My Magic Play
Mar 1701:07:09Tap to summarizeIf you have ever been the one making all the magic — planning, nurturing, showing up — and quietly wondering why no one does it back, this episode is going to change something in you.After listening, you will know:How to tell the difference between a man who is dazzled by you and one who is actually built for youThe red flags she ignored, and what they actually looked like in real timeThe green flags she almost missed — and why high-achieving women do this more than anyoneWhy being "too much" is a lie you were told by the wrong peopleWhat it feels like when you finally stop shrinking and someone shows up to match youToday's guest is Katie, morning radio host of the Wake Up Call on 106.5 The End in Sacramento. She grew up rollerblading through a chocolate factory, performing for 90-year-olds at four, and making magic for everyone around her — long before she found the man who makes it back.Her story will make you laugh, make you feel seen, and make you rethink every man you have been settling for.Run the play.Want a personalized plan for your dating life? Book your free Dating Strategy Call: https://singlemomcollective.lpages.co/black-friday/
Transcribe →Proof That High-Value Men Exist! How to Get One to Find You | The Make Him Stop Scrolling Play
Mar 1000:52:18Tap to summarizeYou've heard me say it a thousand times: the right man exists. Today I'm proving it.For the first time ever, I'm bringing my husband Sean onto the show — not for a cute couples episode, but because I've been getting the same message from women every single week: "Amanda, I love what you teach. But I don't actually believe a man like that exists."So I handed Sean the mic and let him answer that himself.In this episode you'll hear Sean talk about what his dating life actually looked like after his divorce, why he put therapy in his dating profile, what he was filtering for on the apps, and why a strong, confident, financially independent woman didn't intimidate him — it's what made him stop scrolling.He also tells you exactly what he'd say to the woman who is about to give up right now.This is the Play: Make Him Stop Scrolling Play. And the thesis is simple: high-value men exist. But they won't stop for just anyone. So you have to make him stop scrolling.🎯 Run The Play: Download your free Dating Profile Cheat Sheet. → CLICK HERE📞 Ready to get strategic? Book a free Dating Strategy Call → LEARN MORE AND APPLY HERE
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