Half-Life: 3. Lost

Summary

The History Podcast: Half-Life. Episode 3 - "Half-Life: 3. Lost"

Release Date: May 7, 2025

Introduction

In the gripping third episode of The History Podcast titled "Half-Life: 3. Lost," host Joe Dunthorne embarks on a profound journey to uncover the hidden chapters of his German-Jewish family's history. Drawn by a family legend about their dramatic escape from Nazi Germany in 1936, Dunthorne's quest leads him to startling discoveries about his great grandfather's involvements with chemical weapons manufacturing.

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Unveiling Family Secrets

Joe Dunthorne sets the stage by recounting his initial intrigue: "When I read my great grandfather's memoirs, I believed he had distanced himself from his past work with chemical weapons. But my research suggested otherwise" (00:13). This revelation ignites his determination to delve deeper into the true extent of his ancestor's activities.

Notable Quote:

"What else had been softened or erased? What if his confession... was itself a form of wishful thinking." – Joe Dunthorne (00:27)

Discovery in the British Library

Dunthorne discovers a photograph of his grandmother and uncle in an old issue of Degas Masker magazine, a publication ostensibly about gas safety. However, upon closer inspection, he uncovers unsettling imagery depicting SS troops and paramilitary groups in gas mask training exercises (00:13). This finding contradicts his great grandfather's memoirs, which claimed he neither wrote for nor supported the magazine.

Notable Quote:

"I could see why he might have wanted to ignore or forget they existed." – Joe Dunthorne (01:04)

The Augacid Connection

The narrative thickens as Dunthorne reveals that his great grandfather was employed by Augacid Limited, a shell company established in November 1934 ostensibly to produce benign chemical products. However, the company was covertly directed by the German army to build a major chemical weapons factory in Ammendorf. This revelation challenges the distinction between his ancestor's stated defensive research and the actual offensive production of chemical agents (04:29).

Notable Quote:

"The difference between defence and attack, between planning something and actually doing it." – Joe Dunthorne (04:58)

Ammendorf: The Heart of Contamination

Dunthorne travels to Ammendorf, a small town southwest of Oranienburg, to witness the remnants of the Augacid factory. Accompanied by Tanya Goldbecker, a local journalist, he meets Erich Gadda, an 82-year-old dedicated to exposing the site's toxicity and its impact on the community (05:24). Gadda, who worked on the railroad supplying the factory, shares his extensive list of over 70 individuals affected by the contamination, including his own family members who suffered from various cancers and blood diseases (06:28).

Notable Quote:

"Mustard gas... stripped its victim's lungs from the inside." – Erich Gadda (09:47)

Exploring the Contaminated Grounds

Guided by Gadda and joined by Professor Johannes Preuss, an expert on historical weapons factories, Dunthorne explores the desolate Ammendorf site. They traverse areas once used for filling bombs with mustard gas, now contaminated and hazardous. The group observes how local businesses, including a beach club and nightclub, now flourish amidst lingering toxins, highlighting the ongoing neglect of environmental and public health (10:48).

Notable Quote:

"Germany has hundreds... sites contaminated by chemical warfare production." – Johannes Preuss (13:19)

Erich Gadda: The Erin Brockovich of Ammendorf

Gadda's relentless campaign to hold the local council accountable bears parallels to the story of Erin Brockovich. Despite his efforts and the mounting evidence of health impacts, the fight for recognition and compensation remains uphill. Dunthorne captures Gadda's frustration: "It's hard to make people care about something they couldn't see" (18:51).

Notable Quote:

"Nobody will do anything." – Joe Dunthorne (17:43)

Emotional Encounters and Cultural Barriers

In a poignant moment, Dunthorne attempts to bridge the emotional gap with Gadda by sharing his great grandfather's confession of guilt over his role in chemical weapons research. However, cultural and generational differences, along with the weight of historical trauma, make this connection challenging. Their interaction underscores the complexities of reconciling past atrocities with present-day relationships (20:51).

Progress and Ongoing Struggles

Months after Dunthorne's visit, notable progress is made: a historical information board is erected near the contaminated land, and new groundwater testing stations are installed. However, the site remains far from fully decontaminated. Meanwhile, Gadda continues his advocacy despite personal health battles, including a prostate cancer diagnosis (25:43).

Notable Quote:

"It's been quite nerve wracking... the first time I've come somewhere where there's a physical remnant of his work." – Erich Gadda (19:15)

Conclusion: Reflecting on Legacy and Redemption

Dunthorne reflects on the broader implications of his family's history, recognizing the lasting scars of chemical warfare production. His great grandfather's flight from Germany on the Orient Express symbolizes a desperate escape from a morally compromised past. The episode closes with Dunthorne contemplating the necessity of unearthing these dark legacies to prevent history from repeating itself.

Notable Quote:

"I was glad that the next chapter of my family story would involve fewer military industrial poisons." – Joe Dunthorne (25:43)

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Key Takeaways

• The episode delves into the hidden past of Joe Dunthorne's great grandfather, revealing unexpected involvement in chemical weapons production.
• It highlights the enduring environmental and health impacts of wartime industrial activities in Ammendorf.
• Through Erich Gadda's story, the podcast underscores the ongoing struggles of communities affected by industrial contamination.
• The narrative emphasizes the importance of confronting and acknowledging historical injustices to foster understanding and prevent future atrocities.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• "What else had been softened or erased? What if his confession... was itself a form of wishful thinking." – Joe Dunthorne (00:27)
• "I could see why he might have wanted to ignore or forget they existed." – Joe Dunthorne (01:04)
• "The difference between defence and attack, between planning something and actually doing it." – Joe Dunthorne (04:58)
• "Mustard gas... stripped its victim's lungs from the inside." – Erich Gadda (09:47)
• "Germany has hundreds... sites contaminated by chemical warfare production." – Johannes Preuss (13:19)
• "Nobody will do anything." – Joe Dunthorne (17:43)
• "It's been quite nerve wracking... the first time I've come somewhere where there's a physical remnant of his work." – Erich Gadda (19:15)
• "I was glad that the next chapter of my family story would involve fewer military industrial poisons." – Joe Dunthorne (25:43)

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Timestamps Reference

For ease of reference, the notable quotes are linked to their respective timestamps as indicated in parentheses throughout the summary.

Transcript

[Joe Dunthorne]

BBC Sounds Music Radio podcasts.

[Erich Gadda]

In a reading room at the British Library, I found a photo of my grandmother. She was featured aged eight in an issue of Degas Masker magazine, an ominous looking publication from the 1930s. In the picture, she's posing with her brother Eugen in the bomb shelter beneath their apartment. Eugen is the boy in the middle, kind of lanky boy. And he's cranking this ventilator, which he would need if the outdoor air was unbreathable. He would need this to crank this device by hand. Degasmasker was a trade publication for the gas safety industry. But I didn't have to flick through its pages for long to feel that safety wasn't the only thing on the agenda. By 1935, an issue showed photos of SS troops being trained in gas mask technique in Oranienburg. There were pictures of right wing paramilitary groups practicing a forced march while wearing gas masks or carrying limp bodies across a field. Even in its lighter moments, it had unsettling pictures of school children playing Ringer ringer roses while wearing the latest gas masks. I'd been told by the archivist in Oranienburg that he'd spotted my great grandfather's name in Die Gasmasker. This surprised me because according to my great grandfather's own memoir, he neither liked the magazine nor nor ever wrote for it. And yet I soon found not one article but two with his name in the byline. In reading them, I could see why he might have wanted to ignore or forget they existed. The second article, published in 1935, was co authored with a colleague who was a Nazi party member. It explored the poisonous effects of carbon monoxide in enclosed spaces. After I read it, I started to wonder what else had slipped from my great grandfather's memory while writing his memoirs. What else had been softened or erased? What if his confession, in which he seemed to finally fully unburden himself of all that he regretted, was itself a form of wishful thinking. This is Half Life. I'm Joe Dunthorne and you're listening to episode three Lost.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Usually I just walk around. I don't really go onto the side.

[Erich Gadda]

Is this on the right hand side here? Is this all part of it?

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, it's huge.

[Erich Gadda]

Is it?

[Joe Dunthorne]

It's massive. Walking around takes like an hour.

[Erich Gadda]

No way.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, it's massive.

[Johannes Preuss]

It's.

[Joe Dunthorne]

But then this is the place where you can, 17 years later, you can see what it was like. What it was. Yeah. What influence it had.

[Erich Gadda]

In 1934, my great grandfather's employers started building what would become the single most productive chemical weapons factory in Germany. In order to keep their plans quiet, they worked under a new company name, Augacid. They said their plan was to produce and distribute chemical products of all kinds, especially Aug acid, which, since Aug acid itself was a made up word, was the military industrial equivalent of a wink. It amazes me that in creating a shell company to hide their true intentions, they couldn't think of a less sinister name. Augacid Limited was established in November 1934, and three weeks later they had directives from the army to begin construction. Not that my great grandfather mentioned any of this in his memoir. The Orgacid factory was built in Ammendorf, another unassuming small town 100 miles southwest of Oranienburg. It had been my understanding that my great grandfather's work with chemical weapons was purely research based. According to his memoir, he and his colleagues in Oranienburg never manufactured poison gases, but simply worked out the best way to do so should the need arise. For me, this was a subtle but pivotal distinction, the difference between defence and attack, between planning something and actually doing it. But that was before I had heard of Ammendorf.

[Joe Dunthorne]

We might walk a little bit if it's too bad. Yeah, because we can park around here.

[Erich Gadda]

On her day off, Tanya Goldbecker, a local journalist, was driving me to see the still contaminated ground.

[Joe Dunthorne]

It's too dangerous.

[Erich Gadda]

Tanja had arranged for me to meet Mr. Erich Gadda, a twinkly eyed 82 year old with no email address, a mobile he doesn't use, one good ear, a many zipped raincoat and an accordion briefcase full of evidence documenting Amendorf's history of toxicity and industrial malpractice. Erich had agreed to show me around the site. For more than 30 years he worked here on the railroad that brought raw materials directly into the factories. Since then, he's spent another 30 years campaigning for the council to clean up the site of the former chemical weapons plant. He's also been putting together a list of all the people whose health he believes has been affected by either living or working near the contaminated land.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Even some people who have died already. Like they have. They're on the list. Yeah, it's a long list.

[Erich Gadda]

Among the more than 70 names on his list were members of his own family. His brother Wolfgang died of pancreatic cancer at 57 after decades of working on the site. His wife's parents. Parents lived for years in a house wedged between the factories and smokestacks. She developed a brain tumor and he suffered both skin cancer and erythrocytosis. A blood disease linked to chemical exposure.

[Joe Dunthorne]

And over there, where the trees are, there, the way where Mr. Gado was crossing. So you can kind of have a look at the way where he was crossing this, the ogacid area.

[Erich Gadda]

In 2011, Eric himself was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis, one of the known long term complications of exposure to mustard gas. And that's when he added his own name to the list. Mustard gas was a blistering agent first used in World War I by Germany. They called it Lost, named after the two men who invented it, Lommel and Steinkopf. At Ypres in 1917, thousands of British soldiers were temporarily blinded by exposure to it. At school, I remember being shown the famous image of the lines of gas, blind men holding onto each other as they were led away from the trenches. By 1918, the Allies were also using mustard gas. Although it killed relatively few soldiers, it had a lasting psychological impact, a collective fear that carried right through to the Second World War. In the late 1920s, when my great grandfather started working with it, he wrote that it was by far the most dangerous chemical at his laboratory. And part of what made it so risky was that it didn't look like much in liquid form. It was the colour and texture of olive oil, smelled strongly of garlic and absorbed into the skin with little more than a faint itching. But days later came the pus, filled blisters that wouldn't heal and too delicate to be bandaged, often became infected if droplets of Lost were inhaled. It stripped its victim's lungs from the inside. And although Lost was ultimately never used on the battlefield, during the Second World War, thousands of tons of it were still made and stockpiled here in Ammendorf.

[Joe Dunthorne]

It was a big bunker, but it's like bunker, yeah, okay, yeah, that's where it was. That was destroyed.

[Erich Gadda]

When the war ended in 1945, the Soviets forced local workers to burn the remaining supplies of lost.726 tons sprayed into an improvised incinerator. It goes without saying that this was not a scientifically approved way to dispose of a swimming pool's worth of carcinogens. Erich had been only three years old when the sky above the town filled with smoke. Then, as an adult, he got a job working the railway tracks that crossed the contaminated ground.

[Joe Dunthorne]

He always was smelling this kind of mustard of the gas smell. It depended on where the wind was coming. But he says, like he could always smell.

[Erich Gadda]

Despite Erich's campaigning, the local council continue to rent out the land to local businesses. Disco. That's the disco. And yeah, disco.

[Johannes Preuss]

That beach club.

[Erich Gadda]

So through the back of the Orgasid office is this nightclub and you can see the beach. So called beach with lots of deck chairs and sand gives that aaheim shrimpaddy. We could just see the edge of the swimming pool at the back of the nightclub. A bold design choice given that recent studies had shown toxins were still present in the soil and groundwater. On my phone I saw a flyer for a recent industrial techno night which showed clouds of green smoke and a radioactive warning sign. I noticed that the slogan on the club's Instagram page read a little party never killed nobody. Around the corner from the nightclub, Erich hoped that the council would put up a notice board telling the history of this place.

[Joe Dunthorne]

At the corner they want to put up a big sign saying like this was Augustus, this was produced here, information or like kind of remembering what happened here. But it's, it was quite a long process.

[Erich Gadda]

Why did they say no?

[Joe Dunthorne]

First he wanted to put it at the wall and the county said like, oh no, there are other places you can put it up. The darkest epoch of Ammendorf's.

[Erich Gadda]

Also with us was Johannes Preuss, a thoughtful silver haired professor, an expert on former weapons factories from World War I and World War II. Together we climbed some steps to see out across the grounds of the old factory, which was now a scrubland of strange shaped mounds and spindly bushes growing in clumps.

[Johannes Preuss]

I don't know why, but these bushes can grow up on contaminated areas. What other trees cannot accept and die, but they can. So I've seen this picture many times and I've seen more than 50 of these kind of sites.

[Erich Gadda]

And the sites you go to, are they all over Europe or all over Germany?

[Johannes Preuss]

Germany has hundreds.

[Erich Gadda]

Right.

[Johannes Preuss]

You know, they were fighting a war against the world. Yeah, yeah.

[Erich Gadda]

We all walked along the edge of a busy road, then peeled off onto a nondescript stretch of muddy ground about the size of a tennis court. My trainers slipped on the silt and revealed concrete beneath. This had been the filling station where the liquid lost was poured into shells and bombs.

[Johannes Preuss]

What I want to say this is a very, was a contaminated place because there were bombs here, you know, 60,000 bombs with 90 kilogram lost each. So it's more than 5,000 tons of loss were used here. And we did not see any building, you know, but here you can see the floor. This was the floor, floor of this huge building filling plant.

[Erich Gadda]

So this was the floor of the.

[Johannes Preuss]

Factory, of the filling plant?

[Erich Gadda]

Yes.

[Johannes Preuss]

So the bombs came in with the railway. From here they Were brought in. Then they came to, they were cleaned and prepared and so on. Then they were filled in. This bar in the middle.

[Erich Gadda]

Yeah. Do you think that somewhere underground here there still are high levels of contamination?

[Johannes Preuss]

I think so. If you open the old buildings and the cellars and so on, you will find substances. And in the channels, you know, the wastewater channels, but it's not tons, you know. You know, it's only 1% or less. But these substances are dangerous. You can get cancer. You can, of course. Food for endants, Genetic functions, you know, so and so.

[Erich Gadda]

Standing on the site of the old filling station, we couldn't walk any further. There was a metal fence with a warning sign attached.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, it's a life danger. Trespassing is forbidden and parents are responsible for their children. The owner. Yeah, that's a sign.

[Erich Gadda]

It started to rain. And so Erich and I sheltered in the doorway of a derelict electrochemical plant I had in my backpack. Pages 1692 to 1694 of My Great grandfather's memoir. The bit about how guilty he felt at working with chemical weapons. His confession. In packing for this trip, I'd had the idea that I might show these pages to Erich and make a small attempt to connect my great grandfather's regrets about his work with lost to someone whose life had been profoundly affected by it. But it never felt like quite the right moment. Or that's what I told myself anyway. I was aware of the language barrier between us and that I was essentially a stranger. And anyway, there were other more comfortable subjects for us to talk about. Football. Football. English. Liga. English league? Yeah, we. Yeah, the. The second league. The. Do you support Hala? Yeah. Are they. Are they good? Yeah. Are they in the Bundesliga or. 9. 9. So should we go to the office now? Yeah. After exploring the site itself, we all went back to the council building. Everyone there knew Eric, and the office secretary came over to tell us something. You know the movie Erin Brokovich? I did not know the movie Erin Brockovich.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, yeah, it's the same. It's the same. Everybody knows and nobody will do anything.

[Erich Gadda]

In the Hollywood film I have now watched, based on a true story, Erin Brockovich, a tenacious single mother played by Julia Roberts, believes that industrial contamination in the town of Hinckley in California is making the local population unwell. And after collecting evidence for three years, fighting indifference and a corporate cover up, she eventually helps to sue the gas and electric company for hundreds of millions of dollars. Like Erin, the challenge for Erich is to prove a direct causal link between the contamination and human illness.

[Joe Dunthorne]

It could come from this, you know, or your disease. Yeah, it could come from his work. But it's very difficult to find a scientist who proves. I have written to several ones, like four or six scientists to ask them if there could be some air results. I don't know, but no one really wants to talk about it. It's very difficult.

[Erich Gadda]

I could see why they called Erich the Erin Brockovich of Ammendorf, except that he was still some distance away from an ending suitable for Hollywood. It was hard to make people care about something they couldn't see. And has anyone ever received compensation for any of these?

[Johannes Preuss]

No. Never?

[Erich Gadda]

No.

[Joe Dunthorne]

How was it for you coming here to Germany to see the site? What was your.

[Erich Gadda]

Yeah, I mean, I. It's been quite. It's been quite nerve wracking. I guess I feel like this site is the only. Because I've been to Oranienburg as well. But there's no. There's no build. There's nothing left to see. This is the first time I've come somewhere where there's a physical remnant of his work. My great grandparent.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, what was his name?

[Erich Gadda]

Siegfried Merzbacher. He wrote a memoir at the end of his life. He died in 1971 and he says that he never really got over his involvement in the chemical weapons laboratory. And he always felt guilty about it and he suffered from depression and. I've got the document with me and I'd be interested to show it to her Gadar. And obviously meeting Herr Gadda is. Well, it's troubling to hear his story and yeah, it makes me. I handed over the pages and watched him read. It was a long five minutes in which I didn't know what to do with my hands. A part of me imagined that I might see the ripples on his glass of water as his hand shaking with emotion, he tried to lift the drink to his lips. But I could already tell by the slight impatience with which he was reading, his head very subtly shaking from side to side, that this was not going to be one of those moments.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Kind of outside.

[Erich Gadda]

Nein, kind.

[Joe Dunthorne]

He says that this is completely new.

[Erich Gadda]

To him and that he can't say anything to it. Erich didn't want to speak about the confession, and it took my translator, Marta and I some time to realize that he might be feeling uncomfortable about being asked to accept an apology from. From a Jewish chemist. And equally, I couldn't understand at first why he kept showing me pictures of his uncle Otto, who had saved two Jewish women by driving them across the border. On a motorbike. I didn't mean to, but I clearly made him feel he needed to justify his family story. There seemed to be no way for us to speak easily across these tangled pasts, one history making it impossible to acknowledge the other. And so, in the end, it was a relief for both of us to dive back into the blissful release of the documents on the table, the maps, photos, plans and toxicology reports. We shared our research with each other, swapping photocopies and books, bristling with Post it notes instead of more complicated feelings. A few months after my trip to Ammendorf, I was sent a newspaper clipping that showed Erich standing proudly in front of the new information board, which had finally been put up beside the contaminated land, a permanent reminder of the 26,000 tons of poisons manufactured here. The council had also agreed to install four new groundwater testing stations, which was significant progress, although still a long way from actually cleaning up the site. I also heard news that Erich had been diagnosed with prostate cancer, for which he was beginning treatment. In the meantime, he was still campaigning and adding new names to his list of the sick. My family left Germany before the Ammendorf factory was running at full capacity. It was a relief to me to know that even if my great grandfather's research was put in use here, he could not have overseen the production directly. On 5th October 1935, they packed up their belongings and travelled for two days by train, heading 1000 miles east on the Orient Express. They went through Vienna, Budapest, Belgrade, Sofia and to Istanbul, before crossing by boat from Europe to Asia and then on to start a new life in Ankara in Turkey. In his memoir, my great grandfather talked about his sense of relief at finally leaving behind his work with chemical weapons. He wrote, a heavy burden was lifted from me because I was now free of this hated task. Some people may have thought that once I was working in this new country, they could benefit from my knowledge in poison gas. It's even possible that this was why I was asked to go to Turkey. But I stayed entirely away from chemical warfare. In my new position, I was glad not to have to deal with it anymore. I did not mention a single word to the Turks about my knowledge in the field of warfare agents, although I could certainly have strengthened my position by doing so. For my part, I was glad that the next chapter of my family story would involve fewer military industrial poisons. After two years learning more than I could want to know about secondary infections in mustard gas blisters, I was looking forward to a change. So this is a list I made.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Of all the correspondence.

[Erich Gadda]

I asked my mum if she would help me translate some of the hundreds of letters that were sent to and from my family in Turkey.

[Joe Dunthorne]

Yeah, this is April 10th of April. Confidential SM to Klausbaht.

[Erich Gadda]

It was only now I started to notice how many of them seemed to be addressed to his old employers in Berlin.

[Joe Dunthorne]

I received your letter of 10 March.

[Erich Gadda]

And have asked Dr. Engelhardt to inform.

[Joe Dunthorne]

You about the first issue. I put in brackets Chemicals.

[Erich Gadda]

There were in fact 61 letters in total, most of them written between 1935 and 1938. A few weeks later, my mum's handwritten translations started to arrive in the post. In her complex system of highlighter pens, themes were lit up in a different colour. Yellow for poor health, green for the Nazis and red for chemical weapons. With just a casual flick through these pages, I could see that the Ankara letters contained a lot more green and red than I had hoped. That Fern stuck by him all through the war. It's. It seems that they really kept tabs on him. And you think that was complicated for your dad if he was a exiled Jew still on the payroll of a company making poison gas? I don't know whether it was actually on the payroll, but they were very kind to him, really. Right. Half Life was written and presented by me, Jo Dunthorne. It was Produced by Eleanor McDowell and mixed by Mike Woolley. The recordings in Ammendorf were made by Marta Medvedek. The music was composed by Jeremy Walmsley. The story consultant was Sarah Geiss and the executive producer was Alan Hall. It was a Falling tree production for BBC Radio 4 and the History podcast.