Jay Larson - LarsonDew

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Jay Larson - LarsonDew" on The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler

Release Date: October 7, 2024

---

Introduction

In this heartfelt episode of The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler, host Ryan Sickler welcomes back comedian Jay Larson for an intimate conversation about their personal lives, particularly focusing on their experiences as single fathers. The episode delves deep into themes of parenting, co-parenting, relationships, and personal growth, all delivered with the signature humor and candidness that fans have come to love.

---

1. Personal Journeys and Backgrounds

Ryan opens the episode by expressing genuine appreciation for Jay Larson, highlighting their long-standing friendship and shared experiences in the comedy world.

• Ryan Sickler [04:34]: "It's like we're on the Feast, baby. I love just sitting across from you, watching you."

Jay responds with warmth, reflecting on their time together and the support they've provided each other through various life stages.

---

2. Navigating Single Fatherhood

The conversation shifts to their respective journeys as single dads, exploring the challenges and rewards that come with raising children alone.

• Ryan Sickler [09:45]: "I'm making breakfast this morning... I was just crying in the kitchen."

Jay shares his perspective on co-parenting, emphasizing the importance of maintaining a respectful relationship with his ex-wife for the well-being of their children.

• Jay Larson [09:12]: "The last argument we had was January. We're into September, October now, so that's pretty damn good."

---

3. Co-Parenting Dynamics and Boundaries

Both Ryan and Jay discuss the intricacies of co-parenting, highlighting the necessity of boundaries and effective communication to ensure a stable environment for their kids.

• Jay Larson [26:50]: "So you have 50/50. Is that what you guys have?"

• Ryan Sickler [26:50]: "Yes."

They delve into the logistics of shared custody, balancing schedules, and the emotional aspects of seeing their children grow up in split households.

---

4. Impact of Upbringing on Parenting Styles

Ryan and Jay reflect on their own childhoods, discussing how being raised by single parents has influenced their approaches to fatherhood.

• Ryan Sickler [15:43]: "We got nowhere."

• Jay Larson [14:12]: "There's not a night you remember sleeping on your dad's roof."

These reflections provide insight into the motivations behind their commitment to being present and actively involved in their children's lives.

---

5. Communication with Children

A significant portion of the discussion centers on how Ryan and Jay communicate with their kids about their family dynamics, emphasizing openness and emotional support.

• Ryan Sickler [22:18]: "They have feelings. You know what I mean?"

• Jay Larson [21:50]: "That's right. That's where I come in."

They share anecdotes about encouraging their children to express their feelings and the strategies they employ to foster a supportive environment.

---

6. Challenges of Balancing Personal Life and Parenting

The duo candidly talks about the difficulties of managing personal aspirations, such as careers and dating, while fulfilling their responsibilities as single fathers.

• Ryan Sickler [33:44]: "I have friends that are like, oh dude, my son was 12 when he got into volleyball."

• Jay Larson [46:21]: "I'm not bringing a woman into that situation."

They explore the emotional toll and logistical hurdles of seeking new relationships while ensuring their children's needs remain paramount.

---

7. Supporting Children's Interests and Activities

Ryan and Jay discuss the importance of supporting their children's interests, whether in sports, arts, or other activities, and the pride they feel in their children's achievements.

• Jay Larson [49:33]: "I want you to play catch."

• Ryan Sickler [51:22]: "Cheer dad."

These segments highlight their dedication to nurturing their children's passions and the joy they derive from being active participants in their lives.

---

8. Future Aspirations and Personal Growth

Looking ahead, both hosts share their hopes and plans for the future, including personal projects, furthering their careers, and continuing to grow as fathers.

• Ryan Sickler [57:03]: "Do you want to know what is on the first of all, I, you know, I'm big into manifesting."

• Jay Larson [61:56]: "Do your best there, bro."

They discuss ambitions like expanding their creative endeavors and the desire to provide enriching experiences for their children.

---

Notable Quotes

• Ryan Sickler [26:42]: "Kids... they're like, dad is awesome, dude."

• Jay Larson [30:10]: "If you're gonna... It's not going to kill them."

• Ryan Sickler [41:19]: "I want to bash him in the face. I'm like, no, I don't."

These poignant and humorous quotes encapsulate the episode's blend of vulnerability and levity.

---

Conclusion

The episode wraps up with Ryan and Jay reinforcing their friendship and mutual support, encouraging listeners to tune into each other's projects and continue embracing the highs and lows of life with humor and resilience.

• Jay Larson [64:12]: "Thank you for coming on."

• Ryan Sickler [64:25]: "Great to be here, buddy."

Listeners are left with a profound appreciation for the strength and dedication it takes to navigate single parenthood, all told through the engaging and relatable storytelling that defines The HoneyDew.

---

Final Thoughts

This episode of The HoneyDew offers an authentic and engaging look into the lives of Ryan Sickler and Jay Larson as they balance comedy, personal growth, and the responsibilities of single fatherhood. Through their candid dialogue and shared experiences, listeners gain valuable insights into the complexities of co-parenting, the importance of communication, and the unwavering love that drives them to support their children through life's myriad challenges.

Transcript

[A]

Now AT T Mobile get four 5G phones on us and four lines for $25 a line per month when you switch with eligible trade ins, all on America's largest 5G network. Minimum of 4 lines for $25 per line per month with auto pay discount using debit or bank account, $5 more per line without autopay plus taxes and fees and $10 device connection charge phones via 24 monthly bill credits for well qualified customers. Contact us before canceling entire account to continue bill credits or credit stop and balance on a required finance agreement due bill credits end if you pay off devices early ctmobile.com with millions of books on Amazon, there's a reading feeling for everyone. For example, Juan's as he drifts away to nirvana after only the first chapter is different to Maya's when she discovered the narrator was in fact the evil twin, which is also different to Noah's.

[B]

Aw.

[A]

Anytime the cute cyberpunk is mentioned, even though in reality he'd be totally out of his league from to Amazon Books, that reading feeling awaits.

[B]

Let me silence my phone real quick so I can tell you that US.

[A]

Days at US Cellular is back again.

[B]

Exclusive offers just for customers. Just to say thanks.

[A]

Right now you'll get $1200 off any.

[B]

Phone plus $400 off any tablet. Amazing, right? But my family is so excited about.

[A]

Their new devices they keep texting me during the show.

[B]

They're all about us days. Deals like $1200 off any phone plus $400 off any tablet. Terms apply. Visit us cellular.com for details.

[A]

This ad was an actor's portrayal.

[B]

Chicago, IL I' October 12th at the Den Theater, Detroit, Michigan. I'll be there Friday, November 8th at the Magic Bag, Minneapolis, Minnesota. I'll be there Saturday, November 9th at the Parkway Theater, Madison, Wisconsin. I'll be there Friday and Saturday, November 15th and 16th at Comedy on State and Portland, Oregon. I'll be at the Aladdin Theater Saturday, November 23rd. Get your tickets to those shows and all shows on my website@ryan sickler.com the.

[A]

Honeydew with Ryan Sickler.

[B]

Welcome back to the Honey Do Y'all. We're over here doing it in the Night Pants Studios. I'm ryan sickler, ryan sickler.com and ryan sickler on all your social media. And I'm going to start this episode like I start them all by saying thank you. Thank you for supporting this show. Thank you for supporting anything that I do. If you come to a live show merch, I don't care what it is. Thank you. I genuinely appreciate it. And if you got to have more than you got to have the Patreon, listen to me. The Patreon is called the Honey do with y'all. It is this show with y'all, and nobody's got stories like y'all. Okay? If you're. If you're still unsure, I've kept it five bucks a month since we've started. You literally have hundreds of episodes. You're getting the Honeydew a day early ad free. You're getting no censorship on the Patreon, all right? And if you're unsure, go watch the best of episodes that we do right here. The free episodes we put out where I'm sit with Josh Wolf and we're show them highlights of a handful of our favorite episodes and what's going on over there. And if that doesn't convince you, well, then I don't know what to tell you. All right. The way back. Loving doing that show. Thank you for your support of that. Make sure you're going, rating it and reviewing it and all that good stuff. That's one you definitely want to watch. We're really doing a great job. Sam and Kirsten and everybody putting, you know, the old photos in and bringing everybody's past to life. And especially if you're listening or watching this episode, I always tell you the Crab Feast, that's where it started. All right. You got three and a half years of episodes of all your favorite guests in comedy with different stories. Bill Burr, Tom Segor, Christina P. Burke, you name it. All the people you know and love in podcasting and some that are even bigger now are all right there. Make sure you're subscribed to the Crab Feast. That's the biz, y'all. You know what we do here, we highlight the lowlights and always say, these are the stories behind the storytellers. And I am very excited to have this guest back on the Honeydew. Ladies and gentlemen, Jay Larson. Welcome back to the Honeydew. J. Larson.

[A]

It's like we're on the Feast, baby. I love just sitting across from you, watching you.

[B]

Why?

[A]

It's just funny seeing you be sickler because I know you so for so long and so well. Just seeing there's a little moments of things that just are bring me joy about watching you that I'm just even like the little chuckles you have in there. It's fun.

[B]

It's how it started, right? I listen, I. This I was in. Obviously we pre record these a little bit ahead, but I was just in Austin and Dallas. Thank you all for coming out. And the.

[A]

The whole cities came out.

[B]

Yeah, the whole cities and Dallas dude had a FTCF shirt on, but it was blue. And I said, oh, you got the ones that we allowed. And I was like, oh, that looked good. And that thing's old. And they hold up, bro. They hold up. So it's great to have you back here. Good to be here, buddy. Plug everything and anything you want, please.

[A]

Just. Jay larson. Comedy on TikTok, on Instagram, on Facebook. And then I dropped a new special just came out. So it's called Here we Go Again. And it's on the Comedy Stores YouTube page. Check it out.

[B]

It's a lot of the one you were telling me about.

[A]

Yeah. Shot in the Belly room. And it's fun, you know, it's a bunch of jokes that were either on albums that you could never see or they were in places you could never get. And I put them all together in one place and just kind of.

[B]

And where is that?

[A]

Where? It's on the YouTube channel of the Comedy Store. Here we go again.

[B]

All right, here we go. Here we go again. And here we go again, Jay Larson. So again, excuse me, if you've been following us from the beginning. We started as two single gentlemen. Yeah, not necessarily single, more rather.

[A]

Do you remember?

[B]

Not fathers, not children.

[A]

Do you remember what we were going to call the crafts before? Because remember, we were looking for another name and you were like, you know what?

[B]

I like if I like it.

[A]

And it really sums up because of like who we were then is what do you remember? No, you wanted to call it together we're whole.

[B]

Oh yeah.

[A]

Because I was raised by a single mom, you were raised by a single dad. And we were like, it's a good.

[B]

Name if somebody wants to take it out there. I loved it.

[A]

And then you were like, no, we're good crab leaves. And I was like, are you sure? Cuz I like together. Like, yeah, we're going to keep it crab leaves together.

[B]

We're holes are going together. We're home.

[A]

Maybe.

[B]

Well, let's talk about it because we're dads. We're both.

[A]

Did you think you'd be divorced? I. Listen, dude, listen, don't be honest. Because you know, some people get married and they're like, this is a 50, 50 chance. Sometimes you're at a wedding and you're like, please.

[B]

All right, let me answer that two ways. If you're asking me if I ever thought I would get married and get divorced, I Wasn't even sure I'd get married. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When I was young, I thought, I'm gonna get married at 27. And then I was just like, I.

[A]

Thought, 24, right, 24. I saw the briefcase. I saw the white picket fence, man. Two bedroom, one bath. I was limited, man. I was a lawyer. I was a lawyer in that life.

[B]

Oh, that was in the briefcase.

[A]

I got cases, man.

[B]

The 27s when I came out here. Or 25. 4 is when I came out here the second time to begin my career. So I'm thinking, like, looking back now, like, 27 would have been crazy.

[A]

I told my friends the other day, because that earthquake that hit, you know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

People go nuts about that. You know what I do in Earth? I go, you guys feeling this? I get stoked. Like we're on a roller coaster. I'm like, this is amazing. And I just thought about, like, I forget telling whoever you came out to go to school.

[B]

What?

[A]

When you came out to go to college? The guy was like, nah, man, he ain't going to school here. Just hammered.

[B]

The day I woke up, Shannon's mom said, hey, your school's gone. I'm just like, you gotta think that's a dream.

[A]

You guys cool by still calling me?

[B]

We got nowhere.

[A]

Still came right now.

[B]

Still came. Here I am. Oh, God. So, no, I guess I was never sure if I'd get married. I wanted to, but I was never sure if I'd get married. But if I did get married, I did not see myself getting divorced. That was the image.

[A]

I don't think anyone. I mean. Okay, could you imagine how dismal your outlook is? Like, well, we'll see.

[B]

That's fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But then I got into reality, and if you're asking me if I could tell if that relationship was going to go south, yeah, I could tell.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, it was. It was a difficult relationship, but. But. And you were there from the beginning. My. My daughter's mother and I now co parent, so. Good. Look, we do not bat a thousand. We definitely.

[A]

No one does. We definitely have 333 hall of Fame.

[B]

We definitely do have our blow ups. And I'm not gonna lie, sometime feels nice. All right, but I mean, the last argument we had was January. We're into September, October now, so that's pretty damn good. Yeah, that's pretty damn good. And she's very good about helping with switching. If I need something for the tour, you know, I'll. Give me your day, I'll take that day. That Sort of thing. Because I don't want her just to take. And I want to be a dad. Yeah.

[A]

You know, I know you.

[B]

Something I actually had for a taste and then boom. So let's talk about you.

[A]

You're my kids on the way to school today, we're walking to school and my daughter said, do you ever miss your dad? And I said, let me think. I'm like, I missed the most of my life.

[B]

Well, see, there's a two part thing for me as well when I hear that. Because you missed him most of your life, he was alive. But now that he's dead, that's a different thing.

[A]

Well, I.

[B]

What I said, you know what I'm saying?

[A]

I said, you know what, guys? What I think most about my dad is I feel bad that he didn't get the chance to experience what I get to experience with you. I go, yeah, he really missed out. I'm like, because this is my favorite thing in the world. And they're like, yeah, I know. And because I, you know, we talk about a lot. And I'm like, like walking you to school. I'm like, he didn't get to do this. He didn't get to do any of the things I get to do with you guys.

[B]

Do you imagine your kids at night in the same room just being like, no wonder dad's always so. You know what I mean? They're like, dad is awesome, dude.

[A]

You want to hear talk about up? I'm making. There's. I'm making breakfast this morning. And I go, I was singing in a different version of the song, the Thanksgiving, the turkey song. Thanksgiving. The sandler song, you know, Thanksgiving. But I was doing it to other lyrics and Reid was laughing. My son. And I go, let me put it on. So I put it on. And then I'm like, oh, let me put on some more sandler. And I put on like, oh, my God. I put on that song he sings to his wife on end of 100 fresh. And I was like, oh, I'm getting a little teary here. And then my daughter left and I just put on told with Willie for my son. And it starts off fun. And then it's like, oh, you idiot.

[B]

Yeah, it gets crazy.

[A]

Regis look at me like, oh, like he's dying. But I'm like, I'm dying. It's a Hanukkah song. I put that. But no. So then I put on the Chris Farley song. You know that Farley song. Dude, bro, I'm bawling.

[B]

We had John Farley Here as a guest, his brother.

[A]

You are not gonna believe this.

[B]

You call Chris out of the back, bro?

[A]

No, dude.

[B]

So we had him on. That's what I'm saying. And I told him that song and that Sandler special. I didn't see it coming.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And I'm going from laughing, laughing, laughing to just ball. Oh.

[A]

So I listened to this morning, and I'm making, like, you know, I make my daughter sushi for lunch. So I'm making her, like, sushi, and I'm, like, waiting for the rice and got the tuna out, and I'm just sitting there, and then I'm just, like, just. I'm just crying in the kitchen. And she comes out. She's like, can you. She goes, can you fill mine? I turned her. And she's like, I'll fill my water bottle. Save.

[B]

I got it.

[A]

But I literally was like, why am I being this moved? And I'm like, is it because I'm going to see ride today that, like, I'm just, like, open? I know that we're going to be open here. You know me better than 99.9 of the people on this earth. And it's Sandler and the way Sandler. Remember when Sandler's dad died? Did you ever see the Letterman? He went on Letterman and sang that song to his dad. And I just remember being like, God damn. I just love Sandler so much.

[B]

Remember the Adrian Culp story he used to share with us about Sandler? It's one of the ones I tell all the time. And I know we. We. I. I'm sure. I don't know how much it was embellished to us or whatever, but it was something like when they all worked on the Sony lot, they had called Sandler outside. And as a thank you for the. All the money he was making, that company, there was a Rolls Royce. And inside the glove compartment was a check for. I don't remember, at least a million. I feel like five. I was going to say. I wanted to say somewhere around three or four, but yes. Right. And then he gave his dad the Rolls Royce and he got to drive that before he died. And I just thought, man, that's fucking dudes. So I love Sam. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, how can you not? I mean, dude, it's cool. I mean, giving a secondhand gift to his dad. That's cool.

[B]

I'm going to take this.

[A]

You can have that.

[B]

All right. So for people who don't know who you are or your background, you grew up without a dad. Your dad like, my mom. My mom moved two miles away and had wanted nothing to do with us and didn't see us. Your dad moved to town. Over. But you had. You have a brother. A brother and two sisters.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So it's for you being raised by your mom.

[A]

Yeah. So this is one thing I never asked, or I feel like I've asked and never gotten a real answer. But, like, my dad never had any custody. I never slept in a house with him. You know, I mean, like, we'd see him.

[B]

There's not a night you remember sleeping on your dad's roof?

[A]

No, I. There's not one to remember because I never did.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Now, up until I was two, he was living in that house. I. You know, let's also explain.

[B]

You're the baby, or.

[A]

Yeah, I'm the other baby.

[B]

So already shit's gone awry for Sue Larson. Also, shout out to Sue Larson. Sue, little music note. And I just want to tell you, if you ever get a chance. If you ever get a chance, go to. To have a Sue Larson meatball. You do it.

[A]

Oh, I thought you're gonna say, listen to our episode with her on. She was on the crab feast.

[B]

100%. She was on the crab.

[A]

You know what she'll say to me now? Now, do you know who I like a lot is the. Are you garbage guys? She's like, I just think they're so much fun. I go, yeah, I know.

[B]

That's awesome.

[A]

Yeah, it's classic Sue.

[B]

Okay, so your mom, Sue Larson, is raising you and three other kids.

[A]

Four of us. Yeah.

[B]

For you. And you have Auntie Rue.

[A]

Well, I got my. My nana, your Aunt Rue, and my Aunt Gert. So her two sisters. So, like, every day you get home from school, one of them would be there. It'd either be my Nana, and, like, she'd do all the laundry, she would clean the house, she would make our meals. But like, fifth grade, it's like, that's when I started, like, doing my own laundry. It's like you were. You want to clean clothes. You just did your laundry.

[B]

I don't think I've ever asked you in. All the time we've done the Crab Feast, and maybe I haven't. I forgot. But Auntie Rue and Auntie Gert never had kids.

[A]

Dude, Auntie Rue and Auntie Gert lived.

[B]

Together for 90 years, but no kids.

[A]

Never married, no kids.

[B]

Okay, so they didn't have any other kids to take care of. So everybody's pulling together to take care of the four of you.

[A]

Yes. Got It. Yeah. All right. Which, you know, if you look back, that's probably why they didn't have kids.

[B]

I hear you.

[A]

They needed to be there. And like. Yeah. So, you know, you'd get home from school, there were like chunks of time when they weren't there, you know what I mean? But that was essentially it. Yeah, My dad lived the town over, like I said. Never had custody. We never spent any time. Like we'd see him like maybe once a week.

[B]

For what?

[A]

We'd go bowling.

[B]

Okay, so.

[A]

Or you go to a McDonald's.

[B]

I thought you meant you run into him at the grocery store, something.

[A]

You gotta stop me, like, come on, man. Shit. Who you buying food for? You ain't buying it for us.

[B]

I got three things in my cart.

[A]

Jesus. He's loading up for turkey.

[B]

So he would come and take you to do something?

[A]

Yeah, I go to the antique store with them. Like, it's funny when I tell people, I'm like, yeah, I got like 15 memories tops with that man. You know?

[B]

Give me some of them.

[A]

I remember he used to have a van because he was an antique dealer. So like he either had a truck or a van. And I remember like going to a mall or something. And my. He allowed my. My brother brought a friend. It was the three of us in this van. And my dad's sense of humor was like dark, you know, it was dark and he said some fucked up shit to this kid. And I remember being like, oh, shit, you going to. You know.

[B]

Do you remember hit. Just scared to.

[A]

I just remember being in that van. I remember going one time and working at an antique store with him and getting a meatball sub for lunch. And he let me get a card.

[B]

You kidding me right now? What Sue Larson makes?

[A]

I didn't even see it coming. These were cooks, though. These were cooks. They were burnt. Yeah.

[B]

Oh yeah, they were burn all the way through.

[A]

That's why you've never had a medium rare meatball.

[B]

That's why he loves meatball subs, cuz sue probably cooked them for him back in the day.

[A]

Undercooked him. You mean? He. She undercooked him.

[B]

That is hilarious. That is ridiculous.

[A]

Full circle. I remember getting the meatball. Oh, okay, okay. So, yo, if you. If you go back and listen to the su on the craft beast. Actually, I don't think we talked about. It was after weekend came back from being in Boston.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Anyway, I have that memory. I remember one time he got me a drum set for Christmas and like doing pull ups on his arm. You Know what I mean? I remember just like, oh my God. I remember every time I got in his car there'd be McDonald's wrappers like on the floor seat of the passenger side, you know. And he'd eat Big Macs. And I like, God damn, how's he eat that Big Mac? I remember one time being in his apartment. So he lived in an apartment above the bakery, you know, my grandfather's bakery. And then I remember a couple times going to his house in Reading. That was the one we would pass all the time when we go to my grandma's house, we have to pass his street.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. That's brutal.

[A]

Brutal, dude.

[B]

And I told my driving past someone who doesn't love us.

[A]

Well see someone say that he may have.

[B]

We don't have to.

[A]

A house of people who do. Yeah. But the whole time I do. This is, this is what I think. This is why I over communicate with my kids is because that whole time I'm sitting in the backseat of that car and my mother had this big green Chevy, that blue purple smoke when you put the defrost on. And it had like three of us in the back and then my sister here and my mom. And I remember just being back window just pushed up against passing that street and feeling fucking minuscule, tiny. Like I was a. Just a flick of shit that no one cared about as we passed that street. Cause I'm like, why don't I see him? Why doesn't he call? Why don't we talk to him? You know? And this is why now as a divorced parent, we can get. I'm just going to jump real quick. There are days that might. When the kids are with me, they don't ask to FaceTime their mom. I just pull it up, I FaceTime and I put the phone down because I want them to know that. One, I want them to communicate with their mom when they're with me. Two, just say hi, she's out of town. She would love, she'd love to hear it. Never. And I'm not. I think there's been way more growth in society around divorce than when my mother was dealing with it. And I don't know what my parents went through, but my mother never said you should call your dad. Like not even on his birthday.

[B]

I'm pretty positive of. So you, you had a little bit of something from your dad that would make you want more. And I did from my mom at first. And then she split. So I would drive by her street on the way to school every day. Yeah, and it wouldn't be a. It wouldn't be like, I feel like shit. It would be a two fucking fingers up. You know what?

[A]

I'm sure. I'm sure there might have been some of that going on for me, too, but, I mean, I always had a chip on my shoulder as a kid for that. But I would, like, Dude, I literally would walk through life like, what if he's watching? What if you. I remember being on my college campus, walking across the quad, being like, what if he came to, like, just check on me so I'd walk taller. I'd walk, like, in case he sees me. For my so much of my life.

[B]

I have a feeling that if FaceTime and all that shit existed back then, my mom still ain't calling.

[A]

Yeah, well, my dad didn't call. But that's why I'm saying I make sure that they call because you say.

[B]

You use the term over communicate. You think you do.

[A]

I'm not looking at it as a negative term. I, like, check in on their feelings. How you feeling about that? Why is it that you feel that way?

[B]

I'm saying it's funny because that's probably normal communication. And we think it's over because we got zero.

[A]

Right. Well, like, you know, yesterday, for some reason, I think it's because my ex has been out of town a lot, so the kids have been with me. And then they only saw her, you know, it's not all the time, but at breakfast, one of them brought up, like, how they. They miss. They. Oh, my son said, will you stay at mom's house for Christmas this year? And I'm like, buddy, I'm a. I'm a three minutes away. I'm literally three minutes away. And he goes, I know, but, like, it'd be great if you, like, brought a bag and you stayed over. And River's like, you know, you can stay in my room.

[B]

That's cute.

[A]

And I was like, that's sweet, guys. I'm like, but I like my bed. And I go. And then I just. Instead of, like, dodging what's going on here, I'm like, oh, do you miss us being in the. Me being in the house? And they're like, yeah. They're like. Both said, yeah. And I'm like, well, what? I go, that's got to be tough for you. Tell me about that. You know, I always encourage, like, let's talk about. I. I think every parent should have to take improv because parenting is yes and yes and tell me more. And then why? And then Instead of like, running from.

[B]

End is two simple words that I think honest to God could save marriages, business relationships, and children.

[A]

All of that. Totally.

[B]

Instead of being like, nope, or just shutting it down or that's not a thing. Tough enough walking off.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Shutting it down. Shutting it down is not the way to go.

[A]

I saw. I saw my friends with their teenage kids. Their teenage son goes, I want to get a motorcycle. And they just go, you're not getting a motorcycle. And I was like, one, it's two years until they get their license. Two, we're not at the dealership. Three, they don't have the money for. They haven't taken the test. Why shut it down? Why not just entertain the conversation? Why not just be like, oh, yeah, motorcycles are dope. Who doesn't want a motorcycle? Just have a conversation.

[B]

I would shut that one down for sure.

[A]

But what I'll say why.

[B]

I would say, this is why. I would give you a practical reason as a former motorcycle rider myself, and who still holds my M1 class on my driver's license. And the riding a motorcycle back in the day was different. There's so many people texting now.

[A]

I get it.

[B]

And eyes off the road.

[A]

But what I'm saying is that has nothing to do with the more dangerous. I understand.

[B]

And that's what the. That's what you're hearing. The anxiety of that one. I. I can understand that one, but I hear you on something.

[A]

How about this?

[B]

I do think there should be. Not yes and everything, but what my order could be like, yeah, you get a motorcycle and you'd be killed in three months.

[A]

What I'm saying is they're two and a half. It's. Let that conversation take place another time. In the meantime, kids want to be heard and seen. That's it. So at this moment, the kid is saying, I want a motorcycle, and then you're just shutting it down. Right. Let's just take this instance.

[B]

I'm that dad. I would do that.

[A]

I got it. But what I'm saying is, why not just be like, oh, yeah, what is it. What is it about motorcycles that you like? Well, I like. I like the freedom. I like the wind. I like this. Yeah. What else? Like, have you ever. We should. We should go ride those motorcycles at. I haven't finished.

[B]

I know. I'm the dad.

[A]

Step back in.

[B]

Like, now we ride shit.

[A]

No. At the family arcade. Go play the games. Like, on the. Like, find the way to encourage. I read this article a while back that they interviewed like, five highly successful people and they said the things that their parents did for them. I think some are athletes, some were musicians. Is if I was into something, they dove in 100%.

[B]

Yeah, I agree with that.

[A]

And then if six months in they were like, I don't want to play piano anymore, I want to play guitar. The parents like, you got it. They weren't like, you signed up for this.

[B]

I agree with that.

[A]

So all I'm saying is that's not.

[B]

Going to kill them.

[A]

But they're not in the motorcycle dealership about to buy the motorcycle two and a half years away.

[B]

We ain't doing it.

[A]

Shut it down, baby.

[B]

Listen, I will say this to anybody that even thinks about it. As a man who's been on a motorcycle at 80 miles an hour, you can't drive 80. The thing that's against the law, the thing that made me finally be like, this is not for me was being on the beltway and going 80 miles an hour. Right here is an 18 wheeler tire. You know that little thing in the middle that floats, that little floater? It's right here. And I was just like, I'm done. I mean, yeah, what am I doing?

[A]

I get it. I trust me. I don't think they're safe and I don't want my kid to have one either. I still think you have the conversation. It's just the conversation. It's not the purchase. That's all, that's all I'm saying. I forget where this was coming from. It was about like just.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And seeing every.

[B]

Parents would have to take improv as well.

[A]

So I'm sitting there on the floor with my kids and they're, you know, saying that they want me there and I'm like, oh yeah. And that's makes you upset that I'm not there. And they both got like teary eyed and I just kept, I just kept asking questions and I kept listening and kept. I don't try to solve the problem, you know what I mean? I just try to listen, hear, respond. And I'm like, yeah. And I go, well, the one things we need to know is like mom and I are divorced guys and we're not going to be living together again. So I understand that you like want that situation and I understand that it's tough. And they're like, yeah. And I'm like, is there anything I can do? And they're like, yeah, can you say, can you spend that?

[B]

They just hit you. And then again I was like, fuck.

[A]

I kind of, I made a wrong turn. They were like.

[B]

Yeah, you Know everything you just said. Can you shut the fuck up?

[A]

Just spend the night and just do that.

[B]

Kids. Yeah, I get it.

[A]

But at the same time, I think real quick.

[B]

So you have 5050. Is that what you guys have?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And then, not to say too much, but outside, you were like, you know, my wife with work travels quite a bit. So how do you guys work that sort of thing?

[A]

We have a very same thing. Oh, yeah. There's never. There's never.

[B]

She's like, jay, I gotta go for this. And you're like, I got it.

[A]

And, yeah, of course she'll, you know, we send each other dates way in advance, and we ask, we cover for each other. I'm like, I, I. I love it. There's nothing I would want more than to have them. And, like, you know. You know, sometimes there's gonna. I try not to miss anything. You know what I mean? But sometimes a parent's gonna miss.

[B]

So anyway, like, our parents missed our whole lives.

[A]

Yeah. Big part of that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I like to be there for things, you know, Like.

[B]

Yeah, you see birthday, every face when you roll. See that little pop in them, and you're like, all right. I know they're. Yeah.

[A]

And just to get like. And just, like the little tiny. Like, just coming home from school, I get to be there and hear about your moments. What was school like? Why is it tough? What do you love about it? What don't you love about it? We got a scooter. So we ride home the scooter. I get the download on the scooter.

[B]

Where are you at with curse words? They don't do that yet. No, no.

[A]

I've heard them swear before. And I just go, what are we doing?

[B]

I hear music a lot. I hear it. And I'll look back at her and she'll start laughing because I'm like, oh, you knew it was in there. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, well, they'll. They, you know, because I listen to music that's Taylor Swift. Swears in every goddamn song. I look at my daughter, I'm like, what the river? She's like, dad, she. She gets on me. They know if I curse, that, like, yeah, you know, I'm annoyed.

[B]

So you do curse in front of your kids.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're human.

[A]

I look at it like this. Their words, they don't mean a ton, but I say to them, I'm like, when you're around, it's not becoming of a third grader to have to use curse words. Or a for fifth grader or A sixth. And I go and I say, I'm like, listen, you have no reason to use a swear. I go, if you're gonna. Just make sure your teacher's not hearing you or adults aren't hearing you because it's. It's kind of gross.

[B]

That's what my dad told me. Yeah, my dad, he took us to see Stand By Me.

[A]

I watched that with my son by.

[B]

A month ago and we were. What year would that come out, Right?

[A]

Oh, bro, I don't know.

[B]

Kirsten, what year Stand by me come out?

[A]

Early 80s, right?

[B]

She's looking right now. Yeah, some. I'm probably middle school. You know what I mean? We're not. I'm not even in High School.

[A]

84 is my guess.

[B]

It's a good guess. 80 was that, say 86? 86. August 86. 86. So I'm 13.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. What I don't know is I got three years left with my dad. He takes us, and my. My little brother's 10, so he takes us to see Stand By Me and my grandmom's with us too. We all go to see this movie together. And you know, they're cussing and it's a dead body and the whole thing.

[A]

It's also, I mean, as someone who just watched it with my 10 year old, it's heavy. Heavy.

[B]

It's very.

[A]

Yeah, but I mean, it's like I remember being lighter.

[B]

Feldman's dad was mentally ill from the military, all that going on. And I just remember hearing the language a lot. And my grandmother said, kids don't talk like that. And my dad leaned right over and goes, yeah, they do. So after that it was a conversation of. Because I had already been like, with my friends and stuff. We were cussing non stop. We'd see on TV or hear it from a comedy album. And we were cussing and repeating it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And my dad said that to me too. He goes, listen to me. I know what kids do. I was one once. I know how you talk. If I ever have a teacher or another adult come to me about your language, it's going to be a problem. And I was like, got it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then we would just cuss around each other non stop.

[A]

Yeah, I've never. I don't hear them like cussing towards each. Like I like. I said, I don't care if you cuss. And I just go, hey, what are we doing? He goes, sorry, dad. I'm like, that's it. I don't really need to get into it. You know what I mean, like, if it's in casual conversation with me, I'm be like, dude, what? No, wrap it up.

[B]

So what are the hardest parts of it for you right now? You're how many years into four and a half? You're four and a half years into divorced and living in your own place. And so what are the hardest parts in the four and a half years outside of obviously our kids. Feelings like, hey, this and that.

[A]

Yeah. You know, I don't even. It's.

[B]

Can I say, can I ask you this too real quick? When you are present, like if you and Kate are at a game together or whatever, an event together, are you. Do you sit with each other? Are you social?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You talk. Okay.

[A]

Yeah, of course. We'll go to like back to school night together. We'll like, if there's a cheer competition, we all ride together. You know, like, I'll see.

[B]

We don't do that.

[A]

Yeah. Whatever there is. We try to, you know. Yeah. We do, like do birthdays together.

[B]

You know, we're super cordial. We'll see. We don't always do that either. We're super cordial at the games. I call us professional. You know what I mean? She sees us. If one Stella scored last year, we high fived. You know what I mean? Like, she'll see that we're not huggy, we're not affectionate in that way.

[A]

I also think ry kids are so used to their parents. We do everything for our kids, Right. So when it comes to this, like, even them asking me like, will you spend the night? That's something they want. But just because a kid wants something and doesn't mean you give it to them.

[B]

That's right. That's where I. I'm not staying at mom's. Mom's not staying here. That's boundaries.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Gotta teach boundaries now.

[A]

We, we. Because we did do it, where I'm like, I'll sleep on the couch. That's when I used to live like two miles away. Now I'm like less than a half mile.

[B]

But what's hard for you?

[A]

Yeah, I don't think it's hard because they have feelings. You know what I mean? It's like, I can't. I always. This is something I tell the kids all the time. I'm like, why are you going to stress about something you cannot. You're. It's out of your control. I'm like, if something's out of your control, there's nothing you can do about it. I say to them, like, can you control how people are going to react to you. And they're like, no. I'm like, can you control how. What kind of grade you're going to get? And they're like, I don't know. I'm like, you can work at it, but whatever you. That's what you're going to get. I'm never going to get mad at you for a bad grade. I'm going to. I'm going to get mad if you don't prepare, you know, but if you prepare and get a bad grade, whatever, that's you. I'm going to accept you. I think so. I don't. I can't control their feelings. And I'm also not going to try and comfort them to a point where they feel that I give them the answers they want. You know what I mean? Like this. I'm divorced. That's what it is for you. And you know, I. So that's not tough. I think sometimes it's tough that like, I miss the companionship. I miss having like a ride or die who's with me. That when I come home at the end of the day, whether it's work or friends or.

[B]

A wife.

[A]

A wife. Okay, a wife.

[B]

Would you get married again?

[A]

I'd love to.

[B]

You would?

[A]

Yeah. I've tried. I've not tried, but like, I've dated. I tried. I had. It's used, but it's still good.

[B]

There's so much to love about October. The smells, the leave changing and football is back. Make sure you're at your best with Liquid IV's new hydration multiplier plus immune support. Mango passion fruit with 5 times the daily value of vitamin C and 3 times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink. You can give your body the immune support it needs while treating yourself to a taste of the tropics. You guys know I'm out on tour and sometimes that makes it harder to get my body the nutrients and hydration it deserves. Liquid IV hydration multiplier plus immune support. Makes sure I'm getting what I need in an easy, convenient way. Tear pour live more. One stick plus 16 ounces of water. Hydrates better than water alone. I'm telling you, we can't even keep it here. People take it all the time. We keep it at the studio for them. Everybody loves it. Powered by Liquid IV Hydro Science. An optimized ratio of electrolytes, essential vitamins and clinically tested nutrients to turn ordinary water into extraordinary hydration. Support everyday wellness with Liquid IV. Get 20% off your first order of Liquid IV. When you go to LiquidIV.com and use code Honeydew at checkout, that's 20% off your first order when you shop. Better hydration today using promo code [e-mail] the honeydew is sponsored by BetterHelp. Halloween lets us have fun with what scares us. But what about those fears that don't involve zombies and ghosts? Therapy is a great tool for facing your fears and finding ways to overcome them. Because sometimes the scariest thing is not facing our fears in the first place and holding ourselves back. You know, I love therapy. We talk about it all the time. All right? It's good to talk to someone, get things out. It's not, you know, you don't just need to go work this body out all the time. You got to work this out too. And there's stuff that comes up later in life you don't even expect. You don't even see it coming. So if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. You just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist. Then you can switch therapist anytime for no additional charge. Overcome your fears with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.comhoneydew today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp help.com/honeydew. Now let's get back to the dude. Yeah, I definitely would like yourself doing that again.

[A]

Yes. Now if I. What, what can I control in that situation? I can't control what it's going to be like navigating her, getting along with my ex. I can't navigate. I can't control what it's going to be like. I don't know. What, anything. You can't.

[B]

Nothing. Because the person you meet could have four kids. Dude, you don't know anything.

[A]

I would love that. That would be amazing having six kids running around. I don't know, you know, I just know that I haven't met the person yet. I've only truly known about two people in my life that I was like, oh yeah, I'm bonafide in love with this person. So it's only happened twice. You know what I mean? So I haven't had any long term relationship.

[B]

Does your ex date?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

So I guess I should ask this then. So your children haven't been introduced to a new partner?

[A]

No. So what we did in our mediation, because we use the mediator was, if you find someone that's important in your life, they have got to have been around for a little while before they get introduced.

[B]

The Uncle Dave ain't showing up.

[A]

Hey, mom, how come uncle Dave is now dad Dave?

[B]

How come he's naked?

[A]

No. So, and then we have, we built into our mediation that before you introduce the kids to anyone, the other person gets to meet them first. And it's not like this approve of them. It's. I want to, I want to meet a guy to be like, hey man, here's my phone number. Let me tell you a little bit about my son. Let me tell you a little about my daughter. Like, you know, tell me about you. Like, who are you? You're going to be around my kids. Like, hey, here's some ways to handle her. Here's some ways to handle him. That way when my kids come home and they go, mom's got a boyfriend. And I go, yeah, I know, I met him. Great guy. They can be like, oh shit, look at this. Like, no secrets. Like, there's like just. There's no secret. You know what I mean? So we built that, that was important for us to have. So I haven't been introduced to anyone, so.

[B]

And the, and vice versa. You haven't introduced them to any lady?

[A]

I dated one woman and we dated for like nine months. And God, if I could go back, I would do that differently because I just wasn't ready, you know what I mean?

[B]

How soon after your divorce did you start dating?

[A]

I waited seven months before I dated anyone. Then I was dating, then I took time off. Then I met this woman, you know, and dude, I had like this anniversary, our 10 year wedding anniversary trip we were gonna take. I got paid in a gig to go to Mexico. I don't know if I talked about this. I don't think so.

[B]

I don't remember.

[A]

So I had this trip to Mexico and I was like, I'm gonna go by myself. I'm going by.

[B]

Oh, so wait, you had planned for this 10 year and now the time's coming and you guys aren't together.

[A]

Well, so what happened was we had planned for this 10 year which was going to happen. It happened during COVID covet. So nothing. So they allowed you could push it. So I pushed it, pushed it, pushed it, pushed it. Now it's like, I see. I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna take five days, four nights. This resort in Mexico. This resort is like in the jungle, on the beach, so private. I had no idea. Guess how Many people the resort held, but you went, guess how many people the resort held?

[B]

Well, now you're saying, I'm gonna say 30.

[A]

16. And everyone had like a. You had your own little house with pool. I got paid. I did a gig two years in a row for a friend and they paid me in this vacation.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

So, dude, I'm like, when you go to dinner, the restaurant, it didn't even look like a restaurant. You just coming up and they like, unbelievable food. And like I'm see, it's just couples, couples, couples solo. And I like, I could just see people like, that was the guy who was crying in his pool last night. I was literally, what's his face from what's his name? Jason Siegel. In forgetting Sarah Marshall, you ain't going.

[B]

Believe is right now.

[A]

Jason single, get your ass in here.

[B]

Forget Sarah.

[A]

Anyway, so and I went on a solo vacation and I was like, you know what? I'm gonna like, I'm gonna get in touch with my feelings. I'm really gonna have solitude. And I went there. I had an espresso machine in the room. I had an outdoor shower. Every day I'd make an espresso. I'd sit in the shower, drink a coffee, and I wasn't. I'm like, you know what, I'm gonna get back to la. I'm not gonna. I'm gonna off all dating apps. I'm not gonna see anybody. I'm gonna build an outdoor shower. I'm gonna get an espresso. I called my boy whose brother who just got married. Congrats, Justin. Justin to George. Big ups. Big UPS player. He got married. He lives on my vanish street now, by the way. Anyway, yeah, so he got me an espresso machine. He works over there. And then I built an outdoor shower. And then this woman who I had like reached out to a couple times on social and dating apps finally messaged me back and was like, hey, you know, I think we live in the same neighborhood and we end up dating for nine months. So it was just early. I wasn't like. I kept thinking, I'm like, I want my career back on track. I don't know. I was so scared of navigating how I'm gonna introduce my kids to someone. I'm like, are they ready for it? So when I say I over communicate, about eight months ago, I said to the kids, I'm like, so guys, you know, every now and then I go on a date and I go and I want to let you know that I am dating and Someday, you know, they're like, oh, that's great. And I go, you're cool that I'm dating? And my son goes, yeah, we can support you in that.

[B]

He's been here before. I was like, we can support what? That is hilarious. I can't wait till they say we cannot support. I want to know what the thing is. We're like, that we can't.

[A]

Who's this chick, bro? Who is this chick? But like, you know, that's going to be something else that we're just going to have to navigate when that comes up. Up. He said to me the other night, he was like, dad, I can't wait to have kids. I'm like, you want to have kids? He goes, yeah, I can't wait. It's going to be so great. I go, it's so funny, cuz. I go, when I was your age, I had kids names written down in the back of my notebook. You did? Yeah, in fifth grade.

[B]

In fifth grade.

[A]

Boys names and girls names. What I.

[B]

You wanted for your own kids?

[A]

That I wanted to name my kids.

[B]

I wasn't thinking about that.

[A]

I was. And you know what he said to me? He goes, I'll probably just let my wife name them dad. And I was just like, dude, you've got it two figured out.

[B]

You going to be a great husband?

[A]

You better be.

[B]

Heads up.

[A]

You might get fucking walked over. But he's. Yeah, he loves it. He talks about all the time. He volunteers at recess to look over.

[B]

The first grade, the younger kids. Yeah, that's great. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. So the toughest part for me is just like going it all alone and if shit's hitting the fan with work or finances or whatever, there's no one there but you. You know what I mean? So I. Yeah, I.

[B]

Sir, I.

[A]

Do you get it? It's weird. It's like I realize that because, like, you know, I just. I miss that the most. And I. I miss like, when the kids aren't with me, it's fucking. People don't get, like, how. Here's the other thing I want to say right now. How many times when someone I meet knows I'm divorced or whatever, they go, so what do you get the kids on the weekends? I want to bash him in the face. I'm like, no, I don't. In fact, my cousin has autism, right? She's. She's autistic. She's at the house. She's 26, 27. Amazing, amazing, amazing. She's on that show Love on the Spectrum.

[B]

She's on the show.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, she comes over the house with my other cousin to give my daughter a gift. And she goes. She goes, where's your ex? You know, she says, where's Kate? And I go, oh, she's in New York. And she was like, oh, you usually just have the kids on the weekends. And I go, no, I don't. I go, I have 50% of the time. Okay, they're 50% here and 50%. I go, in fact, I think it's probably more at my house than at her house. You know that. And she goes, okay, dude. Me and my other cousin who kind of like travels around with her and goes places with her and takes her.

[B]

To cousin I met that used to live in Sherman Oaks when I was out there back in the day.

[A]

That. That's her mom. But she wasn't. She wasn't there. It's her other cousin. And she looked at me like. And the two of us were just like, oh, my God. It was so funny that she's. She's on autistic on the spectrum, but picked up everything I threw. She's like, okay, ready, set, gift.

[B]

The holidays are in full swing, and so are amazing deals at Amazon.

[A]

You'll save so much on early holiday.

[B]

Beauty gifts like hair care, makeup and skincare. You'll have money left over to get your bro the big bottle of cologne. Just remind him one spritz is enough. Or waterproof mascara resilient enough for watching the holiday classics.

[A]

I love this part.

[B]

Oh, what fun it is to save. Shop Amazon for all your gifting needs.

[A]

After investing billions to light up our network, T Mobile is America's largest 5G network. Plus right now you can switch. Keep your phone and we'll pay it off up to $800. See how you can save on every plan versus Verizon and AT&T. @t mobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines via virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days qualifying unlock device credit service ported 90 plus days with device and eligible carrier and timely redemption required card has no cash access and expires in six months. The perfect gift this season is Here One Moment, the number one New York Times bestseller from Leon Moriarty, author of Big Little Lies. Readers are raving about this book calling impossible to put down. Hear One Moment is a brilliantly constructed tale of an ordinary, short domestic flight where something extraordinary happens. People learn how and when they are going to die. It's the perfect book for book clubs and will stay with you long after finishing the last page. Hear One Moment By Leon Moriarty. Available now wherever books and audiobooks are sold.

[B]

Hey listeners, have a gamer on your.

[A]

Holiday gift list, but you're still not sure what to get them. Head to Lenovo to shop unexpectedly great.

[B]

Deals on tech this season. Gift your number one player with a brand new new PC. Help them go beyond performance in game.

[A]

Without compromise with Intel Core i9 processors. Gaming happens with intel shop now [e-mail] what do you think is the toughest thing for you being a single dad?

[B]

Well, the hardest part for me and the toughest part is, you know, not getting to. So when you, when you have a kid with someone, you assume, you know, if you're going to plan to be a family, that you're going to get 18 years with this kid and then whatever happens after that, they're an adult, they can leave if they want. You can't really control that. So now the math I do is it's cut to nine years.

[A]

Gotcha.

[B]

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I get it. 50. 50. Now I'm at half the time I'm going to get with my kid. That, that I don't like that math number one. And then I read all these stats about how like as a parent, the bulk of your time spent with your kid is childhood because they become an adult and they'll get married and have lives and careers and things. And I think, fuck, like this is that nugget of time that we're talking about and it's been mathematically reduced to half. So I don't fucking like that. That bothers me.

[A]

But again, we can't control that anymore. But it is what it is.

[B]

It is what it is. And here's the other thing too, I'm gonna say really quickly again, and I firmly believe in healthy co parenting and a child or children bouncing back and forth in a good way versus people just staying together under the same roof, screaming at each other and showing you and introducing you in different ways. You know, I stand on that. So that's hard. And also, just also scheduling. Scheduling is a, like I have this podcast, I have three podcasts, I have a tour and then when I leave, I now added a dog into the mix. Yeah, and just scheduling getting someone to watch the dog while I'm gone. Like, listen, it's a whole nother.

[A]

As a guy who's dating, I'd rather date a woman with four kids than one dog.

[B]

Yeah, is that right?

[A]

They can never sleep over. They got. That's it. You can't do anything. A dog you are trapped. A kid. They're like, oh, yeah, they're at their dad's house. Let's.

[B]

Let's go away.

[A]

You want to go away to weekend Ojai?

[B]

Good Lord.

[A]

No.

[B]

Dog's common.

[A]

Yeah. Or you're getting dog sitter or whatever.

[B]

Yeah, it's a lot. So that. That's been scheduling, which is funny because people will ask me the hardest part of podcasting and I'll still to this day, harder than getting a show off the ground or a sponsors or anything is scheduling, is getting two or three people to sit down for one hour and have a conversation. That's hard. So I'm trying to do that alone among this schedule that I have with life. And so now we have, you know, there's gymnastics now and cheer now. And it's funny cause Stella said the other day, she's like, did mom tell you that we're not doing soccer this year? And I was like, no. What's. What's up with not doing soccer? Don't you want to. She's like, I do, but. But cheer crosses over with it and we don't really have time. And I was like, okay. She's like, you're okay with that? And I go, yeah. And she goes, mom. Mom said we were gonna have to have a family meeting. I said, stella, we've never had a family meeting. We don't have. You think they thought I was gonna lose my cause? You know, I'm all, yeah, of course, man. I was. And I said, stella, I don't give a damn. I said, I don't want you playing sports just because I played them. I said, I want you to find what you love. I said, but here's the deal. I do want team sports, and I want team sports for a few reasons. I want you to learn how to be a good loser. I want you to learn how to be a good teammate. I want you to also learn how to depend on people. But I also want you to know that some of them, you can't.

[A]

There's.

[B]

You have shitty teammates. I also want you to learn about bad coaches and people who aren't good at their jobs. Like, you learn all of that in sports. But you've got to love it and you've got to give it your all. And the minute you don't want to do cheer or whatever it is, I'm. That's where I'm at. I'm like, I'm in.

[A]

So back to the motorcycle thing. I'm going to give it a parallel.

[B]

If I Will.

[A]

And I don't even know if it's a parallel.

[B]

Do your best there, bro.

[A]

But I saw a friend from home recently, and I told him that my daughter was in cheer. And he goes, why would you let her do that? And I go, different, because she's interested. Yeah, she's interested in it. It's something she wants to do. I go, what do you think? Every girl that does cheer, her IQ drops and she just starts sucking dicks everywhere. She goes, like, what? That's the whole argument. He's not saying it like, he's saying it because.

[B]

Oh, because she's going to be some.

[A]

Makeup and putting them in costumes, and they're. They're supporting athletes to do work, and we're just the show. Whatever idea you have around what you think it is, I was just like, I don't care. There have been very intelligent, independent, feminist, outspoken women that were cheerleaders. That's it. So I was. What I'm saying is, if I'm gonna always, you know, if she's interested, I'm not going to be like, oh, no, you think I want to be a cheer dad? No. But I got out there when they got first place, baby.

[B]

Did you?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

My shirt came today. I got my shirt tonight.

[A]

Cheer dad.

[B]

Yeah. Because. Well, it's whatever their thing is called.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Cheer dad on.

[A]

I've seen those. You see them at those competitions, bro.

[B]

But that's a funny thing, because I saw something online the other day where these dads were at a. Like, a Lego event and their kids were doing Legos, and they were damn good at Legos. And one dad's like, you believe we got to do this shit? Other kids play football? And I was like, yeah, you fucking dick.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, what do you mean? Like, I'm. How about we support what this kid loves and likes and realize that they're different than us? You don't have to live vicariously through giving your kids kid CTE so he can prove he's a man in society. You. You dumb.

[A]

Dumb.

[B]

So, yeah, I'm out there cheer dadding. I'm out there gymnastics. I'm. I'm. But I'm still the same. Like, oh, I know. Like, let's start two. You know what I'm saying? That's what I'd be at. Business. I'm like, hey, let's go that chest.

[A]

Out, that leg over, whip it, let's go.

[B]

You know, I'm doing the same, of course, with their techniques.

[A]

Yeah. We do the routines in the backyard.

[B]

And Stella makes me Laugh, too. Because she's like, dad, we're not. Not pom pom. You know, it's. It's competitive cheer, and I don't know the terms. I'm like, so are you a flyer? She's like, I'm a base dad. I'm like, all right, I'm gonna learn it. I'm gonna learn it. Don't worry.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

And then we have the disagreement that I don't think it's a sport. And she's like, it's a sport. Like, it's a sporting activity. Just like golf. Just like swimming. And she's like, what? We talked about this on the feast. What's your definition of a sport? To me, a sport has to have a defense. Something. Someone trying to stop you from doing what you're doing. Swimming doesn't have it. Well, cornhole. You can knock the person's thing out.

[A]

I know. And you can put it in front of the goal.

[B]

Sporting activity. Bowling's not. Listen, if you're about to bowl and some dude comes out and tackles you, that's a sport.

[A]

What about javelin? No, that's not a sport.

[B]

Well, who's knocking your javelin out of the air or tackling you before you throw?

[A]

I didn't say, is it defense? I said, is it a sport?

[B]

NASCAR sport. You got other cars out there trying to run off the road. Football, baseball, basketball, hockey. Anything with a competing force. Not cycling.

[A]

Don't go from there. Needs to be defense to a competing force.

[B]

Is a competing man. That's not what it is, is.

[A]

Competing.

[B]

That's what the.

[A]

No one has ever said. I gotta tell you, Jim, the competing force that they're coming with today, I.

[B]

Swear to God, I hope this Sunday you tune in and somebody says that.

[A]

They get the best competing force in the league. I'm against the best offense.

[B]

The CD where I come from, baby. Okay, hold on.

[A]

What cd?

[B]

Competitive.

[A]

Oh, cf.

[B]

I got cte. I guess you got it from too.

[A]

Many head balls in Belgium.

[B]

Guys don't head anymore in soccer.

[A]

Well, you can't head until you're 12 or something.

[B]

Those kick it up there, though. That is a concussion waiting to happen. That thing.

[A]

I tell you what is fun. So my kids don't play sports, right?

[B]

None, no. So what do they do for. So do music.

[A]

Yeah, they do music. She does cheer, right? So sport in our house.

[B]

Sporting activity.

[A]

They both do orchestra at school. He does drums, she does sewing. He was doing soccer. But like. Like a clinic. It's like non competitive. Dude, this is the funniest thing. So it's non competitive soccer. It's just this dude I know who runs these clinics in a park. He played at UPenn. He's a stud. And he's just like. His whole thing is soccer's not supposed to be aggressive. He teaches like, be back, be patient, wait for the moments. Then you go. And so he's got these kids and. And my son would do it and he loved it, but he does not love having to like run at and like, he just doesn't. He just never liked it. Right? So he was doing the soccer and the neighbor across the street is hardcore in a soccer. And he does sleep over, so I'm making breakfast, right? And he goes, I hear the two of them. And he goes, you play? Do you play sports? He goes, yeah, I do non competitive soccer. And he goes, what? And he goes, non. He goes, what's that? He goes, you know, it's soccer, but it's non competitive. He goes, are you on a team? He goes, no, there's no team. And he looks at me, he goes, are you hearing this? That's like, yeah, man. Trust me. You, you could have. I would have played on you hearing this.

[B]

How old is this kid?

[A]

Oh, he's, He's a like 10. He's older than my son. So he's in middle school now. So this. He would have been in sixth grade then maybe.

[B]

Are you hearing this? Like you're not, like you're not signing him up?

[A]

Like, I wasn't.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Like, it's just happening.

[A]

But that's a perfect example of like, you know, I played soccer from 5 to 18, I played baseball from 5 to 23. I love sports. I would be. And I'm like, you're not into it. That's fine by me. You got to be able to play catch.

[B]

I want you to play sports or do something.

[A]

You got to be able to boarding. You have to do something athletic.

[B]

But I'm not going to tell you what you got. That's right.

[A]

Athletic.

[B]

And I'm also kidding.

[A]

Might come around later. I have friends that are like, oh, dude, my son was 12 when he got into volleyball. Or.

[B]

Well, that's the other thing kids are.

[A]

I told Stella I'm not trying to raise pro athletes right.

[B]

If you're. Unless you're going to the Olympics, you're going to age out of gymnastics.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Just like those comedians back in the day when we started in their 20s that would finish their set with a backflip. They ain't doing that in their 40s bro. You better come up with a new closer.

[A]

I'm trying to think of that dude. What was his name?

[B]

Who was it?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

You ain't gonna be able to do that in your 40s, bro.

[A]

You get it? Front Handspring is running from the audience on the stage.

[B]

All right, so what's next for you? What's next as far as.

[A]

So I'm in Ojai with the kids. We went camping. We camp a lot, and I'm getting over camping.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Do you want to know what is on the first of all, I, you know, I'm big into manifesting. Like, I. If I want something, I'm gonna put it up and I'm gonna, like, focus and make it a part of my life. So I bought a Christmas ornament last year of the thing that I want to get.

[B]

Christmas ornament? Is that what you said?

[A]

Okay, you know what it is?

[B]

It's a pop up camper. A what? A pop up. You're getting a pop up camper?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

This is what I want to tell you about you, J. Larson. For years I sat across from you and you had boat shoes and your collar turned up.

[A]

And I never had my collar turned up. You get the footage, you show me the picture.

[B]

Let me get the footage, bro. And you wanted a boat. You always wanted to love a boat. I always wanted a boat. But you were always just. You're always one of us, and now you're starting to really settle into the pop up camper.

[A]

Oh, yeah, dude. I mean, I wanted a Craig Hanson at a pop up. Was I anti it? I just. I think it was.

[B]

You were anti. Anti that lifestyle, and I think you're really starting to lean into it. Which is what you mean.

[A]

Poor?

[B]

Yes, dude. We were trash. Lean into it.

[A]

You weren't. I don't look it up.

[B]

I'm not like that. I mean, financially.

[A]

Financially, I don't look at, like, a pop up camper as being, you know, you can get a $18,000 pop up camper. I just want one.

[B]

I know they can get stupid and then they extend and all that.

[A]

Sure. I'm not saying I need a big rv. All I'm saying is we camp so much, and now my back is jacked. I'm. I'm. I'm sick. I'm cooking on a little camper with gnats all over me. I'm not doing it. I just. I'm not doing it. So what I'm gonna say is we're.

[B]

Gonna get up inside the Camper and do it. Hell, yeah.

[A]

So we're in Ojai. We did one night camping, and then river got stung by something. Her leg. The whole thing blew up, got infected. We're, like, on the river, and I just go, how do you guys feel about checking into, like, a hotel for the night? And they're like, yes. And we went to this place as a pool.

[B]

Are you tenting? Is that why? Okay.

[A]

Yeah. So we're sitting in the pool in the shallow, and me and my son. And I'm looking at him. I'm just staring at him. He's staring back at me. And I go, you're 10. And he goes, yeah. And I go, in three years, we'll have a pool. And he goes, yeah. I go, yeah, what do you think? And he goes, yeah, yeah. So I don't know. I'd love to have a pool. Where. Where is my life going? Is that what you mean? Like, where am I going with life? Where am I going with these kids?

[B]

What do you want next?

[A]

I'd like to take them this.

[B]

As a dad, As a man. As a. A man or whatever.

[A]

So I took the kids to Boston last summer. 12 days, we did. Boston, New York. I took them to see their grandparents.

[B]

Oh, good.

[A]

On their mom's side. They stayed with them a couple days. We went to New Hampshire with my friend. We did a whole bunch of stuff. So this summer, their mom was going away to Spain. And I go, hey, do we want to go to Boston? Well, your mom goes to Spain. And my daughter goes, nah, I don't want to go to Boston. And I go, why not? She goes, we just went. I go, yeah, but that's why you go. You go to see family. We don't see them all the time. She goes, nah, you don't want to see grandma. She goes, nah, she kind of annoys me. And I go, what? And she goes, yeah, she kind of annoys me. And I go, what about Nana? She goes, nah, she annoys me a little bit. And I go, okay, well. Well, what would you rather do than that? She goes, can we go to Japan? And I go, japan, hell.

[B]

I go, that's a great.

[A]

I go, we can't go to Japan. She goes, well, what about Paris? And I'm like, no, what?

[B]

What? Paris, Texas? I'll take you down there a little different.

[A]

But then, you know what I did, Ry? I, like, walked. I walked away from that conversation just being like, who is this girl? You know what I mean? And then I was like, why can't I? You Know what I mean? Like, what, What. What do I need to do to change so that I can go to Japan with my kids? Because I do want to show them things and open them to experiences. You know, like, why not go to Paris? My neighbors went to Paris for Thanksgiving. It was cheaper than going to Chicago.

[B]

Is that right?

[A]

Flights. Two years ago, they were like, we're going to Paris. I go, why? They go. Chicago flights were crazy. And I'm just like, you know, so I'd like to do, like, a big trip with the kids. I would love to. You know, there's some financial things I would love to do. Like, I'd love to. I mean, I know you and I used to talk about an income, property. I want something in the moun that reminds me of, you know, East Coast. And I want to keep writing and directing and, you know, directing has been this thing that I. Have you ever had anything in your life that you're like, oh, I had no idea. This was the thing I always wanted. I. No one just showed me what it was, you know, Like, I used to think directing was like, you got to know cameras and lenses. You know, it doesn't hurt to know it, but I realize I'm like, oh, no. It's like picking out the set and the costumes and how people are going to walk, how the cameras are going to move. You let other people do their jobs. And it's been the thing that I. I'm like, oh, I love this. So I want to continue doing that, hopefully do some, like, TV and film in it. And I would love to find a partner, you know, Like, I think about that often. It would be a nice part.

[B]

I wanted to ask you this. Do you again, when we grew up, you had to go introduce yourself to a lady and stuff, but do you go on dating App. App. Or do you naturally try to go to a coffee shop and maybe meet a person?

[A]

I do both. I do both.

[B]

Yeah, you walk up to a lady and introduce yourself. You will.

[A]

Yeah, I got to. I wanna. I never. You know, dating apps are there because that's where people are gravitating out more than ever. But dating apps are meant to keep you on dating apps. They're terrible. They're built so that you stay on.

[B]

Oh, is that right?

[A]

You know, they don't want you to get off.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Then they lose their business. Business. But I mean, I'm on them, but it's just like, I'm getting to a point where I'm like, there's a lot of things I want to do, and I don't want to be looking for this. Are you on dating apps?

[B]

No.

[A]

No.

[B]

I've never been on a dating app ever. I'll never go on one.

[A]

I have, and I am, and you meet. I've met some really cool people at the same time. It's just like, it can. You can devalue yourself quickly, you know, being on them. So, like, yes, in the wild, for sure.

[B]

No, I met my girlfriend the natural way. I say natural way, but all the times I have, I've walked up and.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or it's been an introduction, and then I've taken it from there. You know what I mean? Like, I love that. I would never. I'm not judging anyone. I personally would never go on a dating app. At least. I don't know if something happened in my 80s and I was bored and I didn't. My wife's gone or whatever. I don't know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I just feel like also the amount of time I have is this much, like, yeah, I have my daughter half the time, so I'm not bringing a woman into that situation. Right. You wouldn't right away.

[A]

Anyway.

[B]

So now your time is 50%. I'm on the road when I don't have her, so there goes that time. And then when I'm in town, I'm doing this and trying to sometimes do in town, stand up. So, you know, I got a Wednesday for you.

[A]

I. Trust me, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

Between this time and this time that.

[A]

I deal with the same exact thing. And that's when it gets tricky, too. You're like, oh, when can you get together? And you're like, could you do this? And they're like, dude, what? Are you really trying to squeeze me into your life? And you're like, yeah, I'm not trying to. It's just, what is there? Because what I'll do sometimes is like, you know, I don't do the road as much. I never did. And now I'm like, oh, well, I got to. And I don't have someone, so I'll do every other weekend. But at the same time, like, you want to have a life life, but it just ends up being the thing you got to do, you know? So I. I get it, man.

[B]

Thank you. Thank you for coming on.

[A]

I love hanging out with you. When we. When I saw you at the Improv and that you were on the same show, I mean, just sitting there in that little booth with you was just like, ugh, no one. I love watching more than you on stage. It was so fun.

[B]

I had to run to the Comedy Store and even get to hang out.

[A]

I understand.

[B]

Plug everything you like.

[A]

Jay Larson Comedy on Instagram. Twitter. I'm not on Twitter. Instagram.

[B]

Tick tock, dude. You got hacked on Twitter and then.

[A]

You let him take it. I just couldn't decorate it. You let him take Horrible that. And I have a new special out here we go again. It's on the Comedy Stores YouTube channel. And then I have two specials, me being Me and Sounds Like Bruce Bruce, Both on my YouTube channel as well. And I got a couple other things we're going to be recording that'll come out later in the year here.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Great to be here, buddy.

[B]

Thanks for coming as always. Ryan Sickler on all your social media. Come see me on tour. Tickets are on my website right now. If you're in town when I'm around, come see a live show. Everything's over on Ryan Sickler.com we'll talk to y'all next week.

[A]

Attention sports enthusiasts. Keep the adrenaline pumping and elevate your game day with Chumba Casino. It's completely free to play, no purchase necessary. Whether you're cheering from the stands, on the move or relaxing at home, Chumba Casino brings the thrill of social casino directly to your fingertips. Experience the ultimate social casino adventure with reels of casino style games offering hundreds of exciting options to choose from and fresh new releases every week. There's always something new and thrilling to explore. From action packed social slots and classic blackjack to engaging bingo and solitaire, the fun never stops. Plus, enjoy generous daily login bonuses and a fantastic free welcome bonus to kickstart your social gaming journey. Dive into the excitement. Discover a world where you can play for your chance to redeem some serious prizes and have a blast along the way. Don't miss out. What are you waiting for? Join now and immerse yourself in non stop fun and adventure with Chumba Casino. Get in on the action [e-mail] and make every day a Chumba Day. No purchase necessary. Supply it's better over here at and T customers. Switching to T Mobile has never been easier. We'll pay off your existing phone and.

[B]

Give you a new one free.

[A]

All on America's largest 5G network. Visit t mobile.com carrierfreedom to switch today. Pay off up to $650 via virtual prepaid MasterCard in 15 days. Free phone up to $830 via 24 monthly bill credits plus tax. Qualifying port in trade in service on Go 5G next and credit required. Contact us before canceling entire account to continue bill credits or credit stop and balance and required finance agreement is due.