Episode Summary: "Be Her Now: Leading from the Woman You’re Becoming"
In this compelling episode of The Influencer Podcast, host Julie Solomon engages in a deeply personal and transformative conversation with Cheryl Ann Skolnicki from the Brilliant Balance Podcast. Titled "Be Her Now: Leading from the Woman You’re Becoming", this episode dives into the pivotal concept of identity recalibration and its profound impact on leadership, business, and personal growth.
1. Introduction to Identity Recalibration
Julie opens the episode by emphasizing the importance of evolving beyond one's current self to embody the "highest version" of oneself. She states, "It's not even more just about being me. It's about being the highest version of me." (00:00). This foundational idea sets the stage for a conversation centered around personal and professional transformation.
Cheryl Ann introduces Julie by highlighting her journey from authoring the bestselling book "Get What You Want" to becoming a catalyst for women aiming to transition from being unseen to unstoppable. Cheryl remarks, "Julie is so true in person to what you see about her online. She's so grounded. She is so just powerfully present." (03:29), underscoring Julie's authenticity and impactful presence.
2. Julie Solomon's Evolution and Focus on Messaging
Julie reflects on her journey over the past five years, noting the evolution from her book to her current specialization in messaging and identity recalibration. She explains, "What I really do, which is kind of underneath the surface of all of that, is more what I call identity recalibration." (08:13). Julie emphasizes that while clients often seek to refine their message or enhance their social media presence, the true transformation begins with reclaiming and realigning their identity.
Cheryl Ann adds, "The idea behind the book of getting what you want really does start with knowing who you are," (09:05), connecting Julie's expertise in messaging to the broader theme of self-awareness and authenticity.
3. The Power of Radical Honesty
A significant portion of the discussion revolves around radical honesty as the first step to attaining one's desires. Julie asserts, "You can't get what you want if you don't know what you want." (10:34). She delves into the barriers that prevent individuals, especially women, from being honest with themselves—such as feelings of unworthiness, lack of confidence, and the tendency to please others.
Using a relatable metaphor, Julie compares this process to spring cleaning a closet, where one must honestly assess and declutter aspects of their identity that no longer serve them. "We need to do the same thing with our own aspects of our values, our beliefs, what it is that we want out of life," she explains (11:32).
4. Understanding and Rewriting Origin Stories
Cheryl Ann introduces the concept of origin stories, which are the foundational narratives that shape our beliefs and decisions. Julie defines an origin story as, "the story of our origin. It's the things that happened earlier in our lives or the belief systems or the people that we were around." (16:05). Understanding one's origin story is crucial for awareness and taking radical responsibility for one's choices.
Julie advocates for rewriting these origin stories to align with one's current and future self. "If that is true, then guess what you can do? You can write, rewrite your story and you can change the script." (17:02). This act of rewriting empowers individuals to shed limiting beliefs and embrace a more authentic and purposeful identity.
5. Embodying the Future Self: "Be Her Now"
A central theme of the episode is the mantra "Be Her Now." Julie elaborates, "I want to be her now," referring to the highest version of herself she aspires to be (32:16). This concept encourages individuals to act and embody the traits and qualities of their future selves today. By doing so, they bridge the gap between their current state and their envisioned future, fostering personal growth and aligning their actions with their aspirations.
Cheryl Ann relates this to the everyday decisions listeners face, noting, "It's where you can align this idea of projection of presence, like your message, with where you're going." (33:43). This alignment ensures that one's message and presence are consistent with their future goals and identity.
6. Messaging as a Reflection of Identity
The conversation further explores how messaging serves as a mirror of one's identity. Julie explains, "Message is from a deeper level. It is your presence, and it is how you embody the presence of who you are." (23:02). Effective messaging, therefore, is not just about words or content but about authentic embodiment of one's true self.
Cheryl Ann illustrates this by comparing it to the unique quirks and personal styles of celebrities, emphasizing that individuality makes one's message more magnetic and authentic. Julie reinforces this by sharing, "How you lead yourself, how you lead your family, how you lead in the workforce... that's how we articulate that embodiment and that presence is through our message." (24:07).
7. Serving the Future Self vs. the Past Self
Julie challenges the common entrepreneurial advice of "serving the former version of yourself." Instead, she advocates for serving the future version of oneself. She shares her personal experience, saying, "I spent years in my business not wanting to work with newbies... because I'm talking, I'm looking, I'm looking at the rearview mirror and I'm serving me five years ago." (34:35). By shifting focus to her future self, Julie transformed her business to better align with her evolved identity and aspirations.
Cheryl Ann echoes this sentiment, highlighting the fatigue and lack of inspiration that comes from serving an outdated version of oneself. She encourages listeners to telegraph their evolving identity and align their actions with their future goals, whether in entrepreneurship or corporate environments.
8. Conclusion: Embracing Continuous Growth
Towards the end of the episode, Julie and Cheryl Ann emphasize the importance of continuous evolution and embracing change. Julie shares a personal anecdote about stepping into her role as a leader by embodying her future self even in challenging conversations, such as discussions about finances (32:40). This practice of acting as if fosters confidence and clarity, enabling individuals to navigate uncertainties with grace and authenticity.
Cheryl Ann concludes by reinforcing the episode's core message: "Be her now. It's one of those things you want to, like, put on a sticky note and keep it in front of you." (32:40). This simple yet powerful reminder serves as a guide for listeners to align their present actions with their envisioned future selves, ensuring that their personal and professional lives reflect their true identities and aspirations.
Notable Quotes:
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Julie Solomon (00:00):
"It's not even more just about being me. It's about being the highest version of me."
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Cheryl Ann Skolnicki (03:29):
"She's so grounded. She is so just powerfully present."
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Julie Solomon (10:34):
"You can't get what you want if you don't know what you want."
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Julie Solomon (11:32):
"We need to do the same thing with our own aspects of our values, our beliefs, what it is that we want out of life."
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Julie Solomon (16:05):
"An origin story is really the story of our origin. It's the things that happened earlier in our lives or the belief systems or the people that we were around."
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Julie Solomon (32:16):
"I want to be her now."
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Cheryl Ann Skolnicki (33:43):
"It's where you can align this idea of projection of presence, like your message, with where you're going."
This episode serves as a profound guide for entrepreneurs and leaders seeking to realign their identity with their message and mission. By embracing the mantra "Be Her Now," listeners are encouraged to embody their future selves today, fostering authentic leadership and meaningful impact in both their personal and professional lives.
