Stop trying to prove yourself to everyone else (+ the 1 shift you need to lead with presence) with Samantha Skelly

Summary

Podcast Summary: Woman of Influence

Host: Julie Solomon

Guest: Samantha Skelly

Episode: Stop Trying to Prove Yourself to Everyone Else (+ the 1 Shift You Need to Lead with Presence)

Date: October 8, 2025

---

Overview of the Episode’s Main Theme

Julie Solomon is joined by Samantha Skelly, founder of Pause Breathwork, to discuss the evolving journey of women entrepreneurs, the spiritual and emotional evolution within business, and the profound shift from proving oneself to others to leading with embodied presence. The episode explores themes of personal and business evolution, reframing ambition, authentic alignment, the power of receptivity, integrating faith, and leveraging breathwork as a tool for deep recalibration and self-trust.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Business as a Spiritual Assignment and Living Entity

[03:25] Samantha Skelly:

• Sees business as a “spiritual assignment” for personal evolution, artistry, and service.
• The pains and challenges in business aren’t failures, but lessons to foster greater freedom and self-liberation.
• “The soul intention of Pause Breathwork is for my evolution first… every trigger that comes from that company, it’s to show me where I’m not yet free.”

[06:00] Samantha Skelly:

• Compares business evolution to cycles of dying and rebirth: “We need to constantly kill things that are not aligned and let go of people who are no longer an energetic fit.”
• Emphasizes that business has its own “consciousness” and must be honored collaboratively, not forced by ego.

---

2. The Shift from the “Boss Babe” Era to Authentic Alignment

[07:00] Samantha Skelly:

• Critiques old models of hyper-masculine, 16-hour days and “scaling for scaling’s sake.”
• Encourages regularly asking: “Does this still feel aligned?”
• Rising trend among women leaders to shed what no longer fits and release performative hustle.

---

3. Navigating Change and “Ego Death” in Business

[09:34] Samantha Skelly:

• Shares a personal reckoning: high revenue but low fulfillment, overcomplicated teams, loss of joy.
• The process wasn’t about burning it all down, but loving the part that felt unworthy unless achieving (“the little girl inside of me”).
• “All those inner child pieces will run our business if they’re not checked, if they’re not loved, if they’re not attuned to.”
• Healing requires feeling and attending to deep-rooted personal narratives, often from childhood and formative experiences.

[12:30] Samantha Skelly:

• Describes the importance of loving herself regardless of external metrics, and not needing to prove.
• “I’m so worthy and full of love and so perfect without anything. I don’t need to prove anything. I could stop right now. I got the T-shirt. I did it. It’s all good.”

---

4. Creating a New Vision and Making Room for Support

[14:34] Samantha Skelly:

• Advocates for having a strong, aligned vision: “Let your belief guide you.”
• Vision (and belief) shifts your brain’s neuroplasticity, creating excitement and capacity to handle change.
• Created a “vision manifesto” she reads daily describing her ideal team size, profit, and creative flow.

[18:26] Samantha Skelly:

• On learning to receive support: previously resisted help, micromanaged; now allows things to be “good enough.”
• Quote: “80% done by someone else is 100% good.” — message from her mentor, Dan Martel.
• Describes practicing receptivity first in marriage (“I can just receive without reciprocating… it’s not transactional”) then bringing that into business.

[20:41] Samantha Skelly:

• Learning to extract more profit for self-care, and “soak in the receptivity”—not just reinvest or over-function.

---

5. The Power of Faith and Returning to God

[22:28] Samantha Skelly:

• Letting God be on her business “board of directors.”
• After years of “new age” spirituality, returned to her Christian roots—found the most groundedness and clarity by focusing her faith.
• Quote: “I began to remember, like, how my parents raised me, you know, to be a woman of faith and to have a relationship with God and to center God in our marriage.”

[28:37] Julie Solomon:

• Shares a similar return to faith after years of using “universe/creator/source” because she feared offending people.
• Realized self-abandonment occurs when hiding faith or people-pleasing.

[33:38] Samantha Skelly:

• Describes her desire to “bring breathwork into churches,” emphasizing breathwork’s agnostic and spiritually connective nature.
• “When I breathe, it’s like a direct… phone line to God.”

---

6. Breathwork as a Vehicle for Self-Trust, Worthiness, and Nervous System Recalibration

[36:24] Samantha Skelly:

• Breathwork quickly moves clients from self-doubt or “fractured” states back to bliss and inner knowing.
• “Whenever I am at work and I feel that trigger of imposter syndrome, I take a moment, I come to my breath.”
• Explains the neuroscience: “Continual conscious breathwork mitigates the amygdala—the center for emotional control and protection. When we suppress that, what arises is the part of us that has more perception and perspective.”
• Breathwork outpaces mindset work: “If you’re feeling like a bag of balls and you’re like 'I’m worthy,' it’s a lose-lose. The biological response will always win… but with breath, you make space for truth and higher self.”

---

7. Embodying a New Standard Across Life and Business

[43:21] Julie Solomon:

• “Whatever we're willing to tolerate, that will always be met. … If there’s something that just keeps being that spiritual sandpaper for you, you’ve got to really ask yourself, what am I tolerating here? And just simply put, raise the standard.”

[42:12] Samantha Skelly:

• Shifts to a CEO archetype that is “slower, more intentional, more creative, and more patient.”
• “I feel alive again for the first time in a long time.”

8. The Power and Privilege of Aligned Partnership

[42:12] Samantha Skelly:

• Reflects on the “alchemical portal” of marriage and having a deeply supportive husband.
• “He’s just been, he’s been so amazing. And the portal of marriage has been alchemical for us.”

---

9. Defining Influence and Soul-Led Living

[44:32] Samantha Skelly:

• “Living a life that is deeply aligned with my soul and not making any compromises on that whatsoever. Even if it doesn’t make sense to the outside world, even if it doesn’t make sense to me at the time, which it often doesn’t.”

[45:48] Samantha Skelly (on being a woman of influence):

• “There’s a deeper level of soul attunement that we all get to step into that is going to free us all and liberate us all. And alchemizing the fear that comes along with doing that is being influential.”

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "Business is a spiritual assignment above everything else.”
  — Samantha Skelly [03:25]
• “The business needs to be constantly evolving… constantly dying and constantly rebirthing.”
  — Samantha Skelly [04:00]
• “We don’t have to work like men.”
  — Samantha Skelly [06:55]
• “When those parts (inner child) calm down and get the love they require… our healthy aligned woman comes online and then she can make decisions.”
  — Samantha Skelly [12:30]
• “If you are in anything other than bliss, you’re in a fractured part of yourself.”
  — Samantha Skelly [36:24]
• “Energy is everything in business. … It’s magnetic.”
  — Samantha Skelly [20:00]
• “Let your belief guide you. … That belief is a biological advantage.”
  — Samantha Skelly [14:34]
• “I let myself receive. … I remember lying there (at the spa) thinking, I deserve this. I don’t have to give this back.”
  — Samantha Skelly [20:53]
• “I began to remember, like, how my parents raised me, to be a woman of faith and to have a relationship with God and to center God in our marriage.”
  — Samantha Skelly [27:00]
• “Whatever we're willing to tolerate, that will always be met.”
  — Julie Solomon [43:21]
• “Living a life that is deeply aligned with my soul and not making any compromises on that whatsoever. … And alchemizing the fear that comes along with doing that is being influential.”
  — Samantha Skelly [44:32]

---

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [03:25] Business as a spiritual assignment and evolution
• [06:55] Moving beyond the “Boss Babe” hustle culture
• [09:34] Reckoning with ambition and the ego’s role
• [14:34] Visioning and energetic identity; daily vision practice
• [18:26] Learning receptivity in marriage and business
• [22:28] Inviting God into business decisions; returning to faith
• [33:38] Breathwork in Christian contexts and overcoming religious barriers
• [36:24] Breathwork as medicine—science and application
• [42:12] Reclaiming aliveness and aligned CEO presence
• [43:21] Raising personal standards and their interconnectedness
• [44:32] Defining woman of influence as soul-led living

---

Episode Flow & Tone

• Warm, deeply personal, and unapologetic in examining both the beauty and messiness of growth.
• Brings humor and candor, especially around letting go of perfectionist, people-pleasing tendencies.
• Explores spiritual themes with respect for different backgrounds while embracing the hosts’ and guests’ return to explicit faith.
• Uplifting, encouraging leaders to trust themselves, receive support, and be honest about what no longer fits.

---

Useful Links and Calls to Action

• Pause Breathwork: pawsbreathwork.com/wealth
  Use code JULIE25 for $25 off the Nov. event mentioned.
• Samantha Skelly’s social media and podcast
• Julie Solomon’s website, book, and platforms

---

For listeners seeking permission to slow down, recalibrate, reclaim spiritual roots, and lead with embodied presence, this episode is both a roadmap and a source of deep encouragement.

Transcript

[Julie Solomon]

I think that whatever we're willing to tolerate, that will always be met.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

And so no matter if it's relationship business, what have you, if there's something that just keeps being that spiritual sandpaper for you, you've got to really ask yourself, like, what am I tolerating here? And just simply put, raise the standard.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

Welcome to Woman of Influence. I'm Julie Solomon and this is where high level women come to recalibrate their, realign their leadership and rise into the next era of impact. If you're ready to align your visibility with your true authority, if you're called to speak to women at the level you now lead, if you're ready for your business to feel as elevated as the woman running it, this is your space. Because real influence isn't built in the algorithm, it's embodied in your identity. Let's get started.

[Julie Solomon]

Hello and welcome back to another episode of Woman of Influence podcast. Today we have the incredible Samantha Skelly with us. Samantha is the founder of Pause, Breathwork, and more than that, she is an incredible women for women type of woman. She has been in my life over the last several years. I got to meet her through mutual friends and we've always been supporters of one another online. But I've been able to experience not only her incredible gifts in person and the work that she does, but I've gotten to experience more of the woman that she is. And she has so much to share, so much wisdom when it comes to the beauty of evolution, the beauty of presence, and really the beauty of trusting in that inner knowing and in that faith that you have that the path that you are on is leading you exactly where you are meant to be. So with that, let's get started. Ms. Samantha Skelly.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's so good to be here.

[Julie Solomon]

It's so good to be here.

[Samantha Skelly]

I'm so happy to hang with you.

[Julie Solomon]

And we've gotten to meet in person, which is amazing, but we've gotten to drop in just multitude of different times. And I was just on your podcast.

[Samantha Skelly]

Virtually, our people loved you. They were like obsessed with you. They're like, that chick is so smart. I'm like, I know. And she's so pretty. Like, what?

[Julie Solomon]

She's so smart. And your community is incredible. They are incredible. But when we were talking, I was like, I'm going through this whole rebrand of my podcast. I'm gonna start doing more in persons. I'm gonna be in la. Do you wanna come? Can we just do yours in person? And you were like, done, sold.

[Samantha Skelly]

So so, yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

And I'm so excited to drop in. You and I have been in this space for a long time. And when I. I love having conversations with women who have been in this space for a long time because you can really tap in and tune into the beauty and the challenges and just the. The life that is evolution and growth and how entrepreneurship and the work that we do plays into so many different aspects of our spiritual selves, of our emotional selves, of our professional selves, and just who we are. And I would love to hear from you because I know that you've been going through some evolutions as well. I mean, also in your personal life, you've recently got married, but in your business.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

So I would love to kind of kick off with, with that idea of what does evolution look like and feel like to you in this stage of your life?

[Samantha Skelly]

I always say that business is a spiritual assignment. It's a sole assignment above everything else. And if we can really put it in that frame above everything else and realize, like, the sole intention of pause breathwork is for my evolution first, meaning, like every trigger that comes from that company, it's to show me where I'm not yet free. And when that's the frame of business, it becomes so much easier because I realize that every single hard patch and every single crunch and every single thing that sucks so much is just allowing me to be a more free, liberated version of myself. So business is a spiritual assignment. Number one, business is artistry. Like, it's. It's a pathway for my artistry. And how can I tap into my artistry so much and show my most authentic, liberated, powerful version of myself through my words, my videos, podcasting, that kind of thing. And that's just like so fun. It's like a channel for self expression. And then number three is service, like staying in service. My dad said to me at dinner, we would always. Six o', clock, we would shut off the tv, we would gather around. Dad would pray and he. My. My parents are. Are so rad. And they would just give us like life lessons over dinner. And one of the things that my dad said when I was like 12, 13 was when you focus on service, you never have to worry about money a day in your life. And it's stuck in there, right? Of like, how can we just like show up for people and help people and collapse time for people and get them to where they want to be quicker, easier and faster. And money just shows up to that type of energy. But to answer your question, with a little Bit more clarity as far as, like, the evolution of business, right? It's like, I am constantly evolving. You are constantly evolving. You know, we are every single day in every single way. We're evolving as wives, we're evolving as mothers. We're evolving as business people. And to think that the business that I created eight years ago and is it going to be in the same iteration as I am today, it's just not possible. The version of me eight years ago, I don't even know who that person is anymore. She's gone, right? And so because of that, the business needs to be constantly evolving. It needs to be constantly dying and constantly rebirthing and constantly dying. We need to constantly kill things that are not aligned and let go of people who are no longer an energetic fit. And we. There gets to be that reciprocal cycle of life. A business is a living, breathing thing, right? It's like the way that I feel it and the way that it comes in for me is pause, has its own consciousness. It's its own thing. And I am walking side by side with this consciousness that has a mission and it has its own agenda. And I'm collaborating with it. It's not me forcing myself onto this thing and my egotistical whatever to be able to, like, meet my own needs. I'm in collaboration with it. And that's a framework that helps me stay aligned and helps me not get stressed out and helps me be patient and helps me take a pause. Like, there's a reason why this mission came to me because I'm the one I need to slow the fuck down, you know? And so the attunement to is this still aligned moment by moment is one of the most important questions we can have as humans, as entrepreneurs, as women in business is, does this still feel aligned? You know, I think the conversation I'm having with so many female entrepreneurs now is, dang, what I built during the Boss Babe era is just so not the vibe anymore. I can't tell you how many hundreds I think I'm having that conversation with my clients, with my friends, with my community of, like, it ain't it. We're working 16 hours a day anymore. It ain't it. It's. That's not the vibe. And so what does that look like? You know, the rise of feminine empowerment is. Was a beautiful thing, but then we were just like, oh, work. We need to work. Let's work like men.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

Hire our husband.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Nothing would make my vagina dry when I was hiring my husband. Like, I love when that man works and makes money. Right. So it's like, now it's like really finding. Okay, so there's pause and there's my needs. How do I meet both needs simultaneously?

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

You know how I'm always talking about resonance and marketing? Well, I wanted to go deeper. So I took Daniel Pink's class on sales on Masterclass, and it completely shifted how I view selling. Instead of tactics or pressure, it was all about trust, connection, and making people feel seen, which is my love language. And that's exactly why I teach my clients. So learning from him was like the fuel for my next level when I took this class. With Masterclass, you can learn from the best to become your best. For just $10 a month, billed annually, you can get access to over 200 classes across business, leadership, communication, creativity, and so much more. Even with my pack schedule, I love how the Masterclass lessons are short, potent, and powerful and very easy to fit in while I'm making tea or getting ready in the morning or driving. And I use it this way to really complement a lot of the work that I am doing in my business, but also outside of it. And you should too, especially if you want to build a business and a life that feels like you. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off of any annual [e-mail] influencer that's 15% [e-mail] influencer masterclass.com influencer and.

[Samantha Skelly]

I. I feel for me, it's a constant dropping into my center, dropping into my truth, and getting really honest with myself about what fits and what doesn't fit. And over the last couple years, like yourself as well, like shutting down massive profit centers because they weren't aligned anymore.

[Julie Solomon]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

You know, it's like when we do something for money and money only, it's gonna. It never works. It never works. And so business is just a living, breathing thing that we get to pay attention to while making sure our ambition is not overriding our nervous system, because that's where we get messed up.

[Julie Solomon]

That's such a good moment. Oh, how are the women that you. That you have been in conversation with, how are they navigating this? This just massive awareness and realization that we. What they built, even if it's successful, even if da da da da da needs to evolve, how are they navigating that process?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, not well.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah, it can be. It can be a reckoning.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's terrifying. Yeah. I'll share my story of this recently because this is the most. This feels still alive, but A year and a half ago, the business was the highest revenue it's ever been, the lowest profits it's ever been, the most team members, the most complications. I was not happy. I'm like, what am I doing this for? Like, I started this because I love breath work. I believe in breath work more than anything else. I believe that when people do breath work, their lives will radically change. I believe that when we get into our body, like, that's why I'm here. I am not here to spend 16 hours on Slack, you know, fucking asking people if they got their job done. It's not the vibe. And so I was sort of living in this all or nothing reality at the time, where I'm like, fuck it, Burn it down. Like, I couldn't see a pathway of it being something else. And I think I had an ego layering on that, because my ego was like, well, surely we can't simplify because then the revenue will drop. And if the revenue drops, then we're not gonna continually grow. And what's. What's that gonna. So I had to, like, I had to love fiercely the part of me that was trying to take over by telling me to keep scaling. And, like, what I mean by that is, like, not destroy it, not cut it off, not, you know, badmouth it, but just love the little girl inside of me that's like, I want to keep growing. What if I don't? Da, da, da. Who am I gonna upset, right? It's like that part of us that shows up as this, like, posturing, as, like, let's grow and scale and crush it underneath the posturing of that pressure is just this little girl who doesn't think that she's good enough, you know? And so to really get with the part of me that's like, am I going to be worthy? If I don't keep doing this, will they still pay attention? Will they still love me? What if I have a business that's not 10 million, but it's 5? Am I still going to be. Am I going to love myself? Like, coming to those questions and a little snapshot from my background. I grew up as a dancer and a child actress, and I was a stunt double on Smallville for four years. And so, so much of my upbringing in those formative years where I got a role and I got love, you know, it's like I did a thing and I got a carrot. Like, I got a gold medal. And I was like, oh, my God. And so, so much of my output was tied to love. That's how I perceived it. So it's like, okay, well, if I stop winning, like, what's that gonna mean? And I really got to have those hard conversations with myself. And so I think a lot of this, the question that you asked of, like, how do we navigate this when the thing that we've poured our everything into is no longer aligned? It's coming to this realization that I'm so worthy and full of love and so perfect without anything. I don't need to prove anything. I could stop right now. It's like, I got the T shirt. I did it. It's all good. And what parts of me are still playing into my business? You know, it's like, all of those inner child pieces will run our business if they're not checked, if they're not loved, if they're not attuned to. If we don't really come to ourselves to go, like, it's okay. Like, I love you. I love you no matter what. And when those parts calm down and they get the love that they require and they get the connection that they require, then our, like, healthy, aligned woman comes online and then she can make decisions rather than our inner children making our business decisions. And so it's really a somatic experience because we can't do this on the level of the mind. We have to get into our bodies and we have to feel through all of those parts. And I jokingly said, like, it's terrifying. It's the worst thing ever. It kind of is. Because we actually have to feel what we've been at war with for years. And for me, there was a part of me still that was in, I gotta do this for whoever. I didn't even know who that person was because it's not my parents. They don't give a shit.

[Julie Solomon]

Right. You know? Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

Like, if it was up to my mom, I'd move back in with her and we would just hang out all day together. You know, she doesn't care.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

You know, there was not that pressure from them, but the pressure is created somewhere. So how can we just be with that and heal that?

[Julie Solomon]

And what happens with the process of. Because a lot of women, including myself, you know, I've gotten to a place where I was like, my ambitions are changing slash dissolving. And what does that mean about me now? Like, if I'm not going towards some kind of goal.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

What does that mean? And how do I get through this? And how do I walk through this? And we all have processes, right? I mean, breath, work, prayer, meditation, journaling. Moving the body, like, all the different things that we can do. What have you seen? Because not only are you credited and the expert at what you do, but you. You certify so many people to also walk this path. What have you found to be the. The through line that when these things come up, when ambitions change, when there needs to be an ego death.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

Like, how do we actually day to day get through that without it completely unraveling us to a place that we can't totally rise from?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, great question. So for me, what I needed to do was I needed to create a vision of who I am now. So when I revenue was the highest, I had that big team, and I'm like, I don't like any of this. I needed to cultivate and create a vision of the future that felt so aligned with the version of me that is in the here and now. And that belief is a biological advantage because it shifts the neuroplasticity of our brain when we have a strong belief. And so I did that. I was like, what would I love? I would love a team that is smaller. I would love a solid profit every single month so my nervous system doesn't feel jacked and that we have to chase sales. I want all the expenses of the business to be covered before month starts so we don't even have to make sales that month and we're profitable. Like, oh, my gosh, that feels so feminine. That feels so fun. I want to get back in my creator energy. I want to be podcasting and creating, and I just cultivated this. This new world for myself of what feels authentic to me. What could I get up and do every single day? I want to get back into writing. You know, I want to have an operator that just, like, gets me, gets my vision. And I just. I got so clear about it. And I had this piece of paper called my vision manifesto, which I still have today. And I read it to myself every morning and every night of how I'm waking up and how I feel and what my team looks like and what we're, you know, what the. What the numbers look like, but really how I feel and how I'm serving my clients and how I'm showing up for them. And I created that reality to the point where, like, there was a part of my nervous system that didn't know if it was actually true or not.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

But that's the point.

[Samantha Skelly]

That's the point. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't know 100%. And now today, that is that reality completely. Like, the business is Half the team, the revenue's dropped. I don't care, though. Cause the profits are way up. And I'm having a great time again. I'm like, this feels like it did when I first launched this business, you know, and it required an ego death, and it required all these things. So I'd say the first thing is have a strong vision. Like, let your belief guide you. And what that does is belief gives us, like, a dopamine rush of, like, excitement. Oh, my gosh. Energy. When we have that dopamine rush, we can actually handle the ups and downs of the vision coming into life. When. When our dopamines crash and we don't have a vision, we just feel like we're all over the place and wobbly. And then we're like, I'll just burn it all down. Well, we don't have to, right? One of the things that my therapist taught me years ago is like. She's like, dude, you got black and white thinking. You have insane black and white thinking. She's like, can you please find the gray? And so that's been something that I was really working on. I was like, oh, I don't have to shut down this business. It's amazing. It's serving so many people, but what's the gray version that's aligned with my soul? And so I. I got to, like, really ask myself that question over and over and ask myself the question of, like, who am I? Like, without pause, without everything, and, like, find that version of myself as this vision is being manifested. So that would be, like, the first thing is, like, get the vision and then find who do I have to be to allow that to be a reality. Right? And a lot of people talk about identity, but I love taking it a step further and really getting with the energetic identity. Like, what does that feel like? The energetic identity of a business that I'm obsessed with and team that I love so much. Like, as you were talking to your last guest, I was just sitting there going through our slack and just seeing the team culture and how everyone's supporting each other. I haven't said a thing in there all day, and no one gives a shit. And it's amazing. You know, it's just so great. People are celebrating each other. We're, like, selling tickets for our event right now. So they're like, oh, my gosh, more. It's just so fun. And it's. It's everything that I wrote on that piece of paper. But I had to set the vision, create the energetic identity of a Woman who can have the capacity to be really supported.

[Julie Solomon]

Yes. Share more about that.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

To be, like, allowing yourself to be supported. What did that not. Not used to look like for you?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

And then after you created this vision, CA and 2 let me know, like.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

How long did this.

[Julie Solomon]

Did this kind of reshift and reprogram take? And then what does that look like now?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. Yeah. So this whole concept of allowing receptivity to feel safe, whether that's with money, whether that's with support, it's just sort of been like, it's been conditioned out of us as women, you know, And I think the do it all martyrism thing just really took over and made us all feel burnt out and exhausted. And so I first started with my husband of really practicing there, where it felt really safe, you know, of like, how much can I receive from him? And that just, like, did wonders to our marriage and our relationship. Of, wow, I can really let myself be held by this person and I don't have to over perform. I don't have to do anything to prove my worth or receive love. I can just receive without, like, reciprocating. It's not transactional. And so once I was like, oh, dang, this feels really nice. This is so good. Then I started to take it into business, and I got out of my fixer mode. You know, I got out of my. I need to be in every meeting. I need to fix everything. And one of my really good friends and mentors, Dan Martel, says 80% done by someone else is 100% good. So I just let that be enough. And I loved my perfectionist until she didn't show up in Slack anymore, you know, And I was like, you know, like, I would get like a. A graphic. Come in. Sam, can you approve this? I'm like, it's good enough. And I just let it be enough. I'm like, someone took the time to create that graphic.

[Julie Solomon]

Amazing.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's gonna be good enough.

[Julie Solomon]

Right?

[Samantha Skelly]

Whereas before, I would like stress. But no, the font. This actually doesn't give a. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter, you know, because energy is everything in business. It's so beyond, like, the reason why your company's successful. My company is successful. Is not because we have the best graphic. It's because of the energy that we bring to these missions. It's magnetic.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

People are like, what is that? I want some of that. So I let myself be okay with it not being the way that I thought it should be, and I let myself receive. And I let myself feel supported, and I. And I let myself take more money out of the business versus, like, reinvesting every dollar. I'll take some of that. I remember this one moment. There's a spa that I'm obsessed with in San Diego. Next time you come down, we should go. It's called Rancho Valencia.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

And it's like a bougie spa. And I'm so obsessed, and I'm lying there after I decided to take more money out of the business to make myself feel, like, pampered and nourished and just practicing receptivity. I remember lying there on this, like, massage table with this insane masseuse. And those massages are what, like, 500 bucks or something? And I just remember this moment of, like, oh, my goodness, my business allowed me to buy this massage. And now this person is rubbing my body, and I'm receiving that, and I'm just, like, soaking in the receptivity and letting that feel so good. And it was just this moment of, like, I deserve this, you know, Like, I don't have to give this back. I get to just soak this in. And then I began to look for it everywhere of, like, how much more breath can I receive?

[Julie Solomon]

That's huge.

[Samantha Skelly]

How much more presence can I. And so it really started this beautiful trajectory of receptivity, which only grows our energy. So we can give more and then we can create more, and then we can produce. It actually only creates abundance. And so that was probably like a year and a half of rewiring my nervous system for safety, not letting my ambition, you know, override anything, and really getting to a place where I just felt good. You know, I'm at this place, naturally, where I'm like, I could lose everything tomorrow, and I don't care, which is interesting.

[Julie Solomon]

But that's peace, I think.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yes. Because that's.

[Julie Solomon]

That's full trust and just knowing that all is well. You are okay.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

Even if you're not, you are. Because it's all in the service of the greatest good for you and for everything that you touch.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. And another big thing is I let God be on my board of directors for the first time in a while.

[Julie Solomon]

You know, I want to talk about that because I remember you. You did a post, I don't know, maybe a couple months ago, where it was like, creator, source, higher power. You're like, it. It's good.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

It's God. It's God. It's God.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's God.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

It's God.

[Julie Solomon]

Like, let's just how say to Space.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's God. Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

So I would love to hear a little bit more about what does that mean that you. You let God into the board? The board seat.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. Of.

[Julie Solomon]

Of Samantha Skelly Corp. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you also touched on earlier about, you know, you were talking about when you were little at the dinner table and your dad would pray. What has the power of prayer? Being in your life since an early age, supported your ability to show up and trust. And in faith.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

I built my business around what I believe in. Clarity, alignment, and serving from your highest self. But even the most powerful message needs a platform to carry it. That's why Shopify isn't just a tech tool. It's a literal extension of your brand's integrity. From product delivery to customer experience, Shopify handles the details that matter with built in automation, smart design templates and support for everything from shipping to returns. It's built to scale with your vision. Turn your big business idea into. With Shopify on your side, sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling [e-mail] influencer. Go to shopify.cominfluencer shopify.cominfluencer.

[Samantha Skelly]

Okay, so little backstory. I grew up Christian. Grew up in a Christian home, Sunday school, church Sunday, you know, like summer camp, Christian camp, the whole thing. And then I got to like 21 and I sort of started to go like, new age universe, source, all the angels, all the light beings. I kind of like went there a little and it felt like spiritual Disneyland. Like, I didn't feel grounded. I was like, yeah, all these energies are coming in and I'm seeing things and it's this and it's that and it's, oh, my God, something here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like we are living on planet Earth. Like, fuck. And so I then began to go like, why am I saying universe? God created the universe. So why am I praising the universe when that's God's work? And I started to, like, question all these, like, new age things, you know, especially like being a hay house author and immersing myself in that community and reading all the books, all this stuff. It's. It's seductive, it's attractive, it's sexy. It's like, oh, my God. And then I just started to, like, come back to my Christian roots and the teachings that my parents used to teach us at the dinner table. And I looked at it and I'm like, that's the shit that makes me the most happy, you know, like having a relationship to God and not Having diffuse awareness in my beliefs around higher power, but, like, having that one relationship. And that's when I felt the most confident and aware and alive and connected and, you know, being at Christian summer camp and, like, singing and praising and preaching and supporting and, like, that's when I felt, like, the most me. And so I began to, like, incorporate it back in. Eric was the one. My husband was the one. He's like, let's go back to church. I'm like, fuck, yeah, that sounds. My mom's still like, why do you swear so much? That's not a Christian thing. I'm like, I just think it is, Mom. It's just me. Okay?

[Julie Solomon]

It's just me. Just me.

[Samantha Skelly]

That was funny timing. So we started to go back to church, and something awoke in me again, and it was this familiar remembrance of connection and aliveness and love. And I remember that no matter what I do, no matter what decision that I make, I'm always supported and I'm always guided, and God's always there, and I can always ask. And so I began praying way more and asking, like, hey, God, I don't know what to do in this situation. Like, I'm waking up and I have stress in my gums. Like, what is going on? Like, I can't think straight. I don't know my next move. And there would always be an answer. And sometimes the answer is just breathe. Sometimes the answer is do nothing. Sometimes the answer is fire that person. Right. But there was always an answer. And I'm like, oh, my gosh, this shit works. You know? Right. And so I began to remember, like, how my parents raised me, you know, to be a woman of faith and to have a relationship with God and to center God in our marriage. You know, my parents used to always say, it's God first.

[Julie Solomon]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

Then it's mom and dad.

[Julie Solomon]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

Then as you guys. Yep. Yeah, kids. And I saw that. I saw that modeled. And it works. You know, the family unit works. And I think there's so many forces in our world right now that are trying to pull away the family unit. And, like, look at what's happening to kids.

[Julie Solomon]

Right?

[Samantha Skelly]

You know, like, we won't go down that political rabbit hole, but we could. You know, it's like, there's pressure on strong families. And what's so important is to have a strong family unit with a strong faith and raising emotionally intelligent, vibrant little children who can be the next example for the next generation. And so when I just. When I look at the Bible and I look at a lot of it just makes sense to me.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

And so going back to how I've incorporated that into my business, it's like I already talked about how, you know, pause has a consciousness, and there's me and then there's God. You know, it's like pause, God and me, and we're all doing this thing together. And before I seek, you know, advisory from any of my mentors, that's where I go first.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

I'm like, let me just check in with that and let me check in with Paz over here. Let me check in with my alignment, and then I'll go get a second opinion to see, like, where you at with that. Because experience is super valuable, you know, and that's how I'm doing these days. And the pacing of it is slower, and it's more congruent with the mission of this company, which is to pause, to slow down, to recalibrate, to get into our bodies. And so the way that I'm running it as the founder now is much more in alignment than it ever has been before. And it feels so good.

[Julie Solomon]

I love that you shared that. And it's. It's a very similar thing that I want to reflect back to you too, is that very similar backgrounds and upbringing. And I remember when I first came on the online space and really had a podcast in 2017, I started to use Universe Creator Source. And when I think back on it, why I use those things is because I didn't want to offend other people by using the word God. And it was because of my own separation with my faith and my upbringing, because similar to you, like, I grew up in that and then I kind of went down my own path in my own journey and. And then have now found myself back to that. I very recently realized that, you know, other people could have been raised very similar to me and had a horrendous experience.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, for sure.

[Julie Solomon]

I didn't. It's actually a self abandonment.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

By. By choosing things like calling it universe instead of God because I don't want to disappoint some people or I don't want to offend some people when I can't control that anyway.

[Samantha Skelly]

Oh, completely.

[Julie Solomon]

And so it's. It's actually an offense to my own connection with God by not saying and by seeking that elsewhere. And so that was like a huge awakening and reckoning for me and our family unit. And we have since found our way back to a church very recently as well. And it's just been this beautiful thing. And, you know, even my husband who was raised Catholic, had a very different experience.

[Samantha Skelly]

Oh, I'm sure. Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

But he's been able to find a path. And I do. I think that I now. And I love when I get to have that shared language with someone and have this kind of conversation, because I think that even when I didn't realize it, and I would be curious to see what you think that having the faith that I had was actually my superpower, and it was my secret sauce the entire time, even when I didn't realize it. Because my. My husband will say, he's like, you just have this unwavering, steadfast faith about you. You always have that. Like, you just know that everything's going to be okay.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. Like. Yeah, you just know that.

[Julie Solomon]

You just have this connection. And even when I felt like I wasn't as connected to God as I had been growing up or in other aspects of, he would see that. And so now that I've kind of come back and I'm on this new journey with deepening my relationship and reading the Bible again and kind of getting back to what were basics for me, I also see that it was a superpower because so many people didn't have that 100%. And so what was so normal to me, you know, being in church, going to Sunday school, going to church Wednesday night, the hymns, the song, like, all of those things that were just such a natural part of my upbringing and so many people didn't have that and so doesn't make it or not. Everyone's experience is beautiful and valid. And it's not. It's not up to me to. To put my belief onto someone. But I would just be curious to see, like, if you feel that way or if you've tapped into any of that and how that's kind of shaping where you're going.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, it's interesting. I. Thanks for sharing that. That's so good. It's so good. And I was reflecting as you were sharing, like, why did I start using, like, universe and source and stuff like that and sort of abandoned my faith? And I think when I found breath work, this was like 17 years ago now. It was, like, more popular in the new age. Right. You know, with people. It's. It's like people who were talking about breath work were super New Agey. They were way on that side. And because I was so obsessed with breath work and how it made me feel and how it made me come alive and how it made me connect to God, oddly enough, I sort of surrounded myself with all of those Conversations.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

Like Dorian Virtue, you know, like, yes. And. And since. Since then, she's. That's a whole other thing that I find fascinating.

[Julie Solomon]

But, yeah. Anyway, not surprised though, right?

[Samantha Skelly]

It's like, exactly. Like, I was in the hay house world, so it was like, so much of that was happening, and so I just adapted that language without critically thinking about it, you know?

[Julie Solomon]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

And I think I wanted to be relatable and not create divisiveness because the word God carries a lot of charge for many people.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

Because of a lot of, like, religious stuff. Right. And so, yeah, that's kind of what I did. And it was so interesting, actually. Like, one of my big passions and something that I am so excited and feel called to do is teach breathwork in churches. And there's still this, like, interesting correlation with, like, the Christian community isn't super into breathwork Taboo. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I got asked.

[Julie Solomon]

They have crystals over there. I don't know.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, exactly, exactly. It's like, there's so much of a mergence of breathwork and crystals and tarot cards and all the things that, like, Christian communities, like, we're not into that. And so one of my visions and missions is to amalgam, like, get breath work out of there and put it back in, you know, in churches, because it's not.

[Julie Solomon]

It's agnostic 100.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's the first that, like, God gave us the breath. Like, it's the first thing we do when we come in, come out of the womb. It's the last thing we do when we go to sleep and it's like. Or go to sleep when we die. We don't have to believe in anything in order to have a massive awakening with breath work. And I breathe and then I pray, because when I breathe, I open up my body. I feel so connected to God. When I breathe, it's like a direct. It's like a phone line to God. I'm like, I am using my breath to open up my body to talk to God. And I hear. I hear the responses so clearly. And so anyway, I got this, like, one of the top Christian podcasts, Reach out to me. They're like, hey, we'd love to have you on the show. I'm like, are you sure? She's like, yeah, but I just want to talk to you for, like, half an hour before you come on. I was like, no problem. I got on the phone with her. She's full of fear. She's like, our audience is asking for this. But, like, I just don't know, I don't know if it's going to be a vibe. I don't know. I don't know.

[Julie Solomon]

I don't.

[Samantha Skelly]

She's like, please don't, like, say anything about new age. I'm like, I won't. I will make it to so digestible for your audience. Just like, let's go.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

We recorded the podcast. It was so good. And then after, she was like, I can't release it. I'm like, what? I'm like, it would help so many people with their relationship to God, you know, but the associations with breathwork, you know, are, as far as the Christian community are concerned, are that it's like, you know, on the other side of the spectrum. So it's just interesting. It's interesting. I like, that's one of the things I love so much about breathwork is we, we. You don't need to believe in anything. You don't need to subscribe to anything.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's you and God. It's you and you.

[Julie Solomon]

Yep.

[Samantha Skelly]

Or it's you and you until you find God through it. Right? Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

And maybe that's going to be your mission.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, maybe I, like, bring it through. Planted a seed, everyone. Did you plant a seed? So good.

[Julie Solomon]

Well, speaking of breath work.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

So, I mean, I have had the gift, truly G, of going through breathwork processes and sessions with you, and it is so alchemizing, liberating, shedding just so much. You have an incredible app that I could not recommend enough for people. Walk us through a little bit about how the use of and as it relates to all the conversations that we've had today and really, just this overarching theme of self trust, of worthiness, of courage, permission. How do you see breath work being an integral part in helping us recalibrate the nervous system and helping us getting through all of these evolutionary points for our growth and success.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, that's such a good question. One of my mentors said once upon a time, she said, if you are in anything other than bliss, you're in a fractured part of yourself. Meaning bliss is available 247 all of the time. And there is no other. In my experience, there's no other modality or medicine that's quicker and more effective than our breath. Three minutes can allow us to get out of the part of us that says we're not good enough, the part of us that says we're not worthy, the part of us that says we can't do it. Whenever I am at work and I'm like, at my Computer. And I feel like that trigger of whatever it is, imposter syndrome, whatever. I take a moment, I come to my breath. And what we're doing a little science for you. When we're doing continual conscious breath work, like the two in, one out, what we're doing in that moment is we're mitigating the response of the amygdala. The amygdala is a center for emotional control. It's where all of our protectors and survival strategies live. So when the response is suppressed, what arises is the part of us that has more perception and perspective. So we're not looking through life through the lens of our survival strategies. We're actually tapped into our heart, our center, our energy, our connection to the divine. And from that vantage point, we view ourselves and the world so different. It's really about we change the way the world looks. You're changing our energy, right? We're commanding reality with our energy, moment by moment by moment by moment by moment. If we try and do that at the level of the mind, we're trying to use positive thinking over our survival strategies. A survival strategy is a biological function that is so ingrained in us that is not going anywhere.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's so there. But if you're feeling like a bag of balls and you're like, I'm worthy, I'm worthy, I'm worthy. It's like you're fighting against that mindset and it's a. It's lose, lose. The biological response will always win. That survival strategy has been ingrained forever. So when we pattern interrupt the survival strategy, we have spaciousness for us to go, oh, that's just a part of me that's trying to keep me safe. Because our survival strategies are not bad. They're actually amazing. They keep us safe, but they're over functioning. You know, it's like when we go send that email to that client, whatever book us speaking gig, whatever it is, they're just over functioning. You know, the part of you is like, I don't know if they're gonna book you for that. Are you sure you're that good? Yes, I am. I got this. You know, I got this. And so the breath allows us to have that space so that we can find our truth and find our higher self, and then we can begin to take action from that place. And so I don't know if I answered your question, but you did beautifully. But here we are.

[Julie Solomon]

Here we are. And it is, it's. It's so like what you were saying earlier, you know, it's the first thing we do when we're born and it's the last thing we do when we die. Yeah, I mean, that's. Yeah, that's just monumental when you think about it that way.

[Samantha Skelly]

That's wild.

[Julie Solomon]

And just really tapping into how powerful, simple yet powerful the power of breath can be.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. Yeah. It's like the quality of our life comes down to the quality of our breath and the story.

[Julie Solomon]

So good.

[Samantha Skelly]

And we all have access to it right now.

[Julie Solomon]

Okay, so you have a retreat coming up?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. A Today Love event.

[Julie Solomon]

Yes. Is it November?

[Samantha Skelly]

November.

[Julie Solomon]

Okay. So this will air.

[Samantha Skelly]

Oh, cool.

[Julie Solomon]

Yes. By then share a little bit about that.

[Samantha Skelly]

Awesome.

[Julie Solomon]

And then what else is to come in this world of marriage and really of anchoring into this new experience with your business?

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah, great question. So the event is in San Diego, aka heaven on earth. It's two days, 200 women really working on our wealth consciousness, really tapping into like that vision I talked about. Like, what is your unique vision that your soul came here to actualize? And how can we spend these two days getting so clear on that, releasing any archaic scarcity that's stuck in our nervous system that stops us from really living out the lives that we're here to live. It's gonna be a really beautiful mixture of like deep healing through somatic stuff. Breathwork, dance, move and shaken, and then a lot of just beautiful teachings on wealth, consciousness and awakening. And it's just gonna be absolutely incredible. So that's pawsbreathwork.com wealth. You can use code Julie 25 for 25 off. Yeah, that's gonna be super fun. I can't wait. That's gonna be incredible. And then what's next for me? So, so much of the work that I've been doing is like really helping women tap into their greatness by healing burnout. Like, women are so burnt out right now. And I really believe that breathwork and somatic healing is the antidote to burnout. And when we get ourselves out of our survival strategies and out of overwhelm and we learn how to use our bodies and our breath as these vehicles and vessels for transformation and awakening, like, we really become unstoppable. Like, we can do so much when we have the energetic resource inside of our bodies. And so there's a new book coming out on burnouts. There's a new keynote happening on burnout. So it's all around healing burnout through breath work and somatic healing. And. And really just career wise. And all that is retiring myself from the CEO. I thought I needed to be in order to have a successful business. And stepping into the CEO that feels aligned with my soul, which is slower and more intentional and more creative and more patient. And that's been going on for a little while now. And it just feels alive. Like I feel alive again for the first time in a long time.

[Julie Solomon]

That's beautiful. It's beautiful. And I can feel it. I can feel that that's exuding through you for sure.

[Samantha Skelly]

Thanks, babe. Yes, babe. And like, my husband's been just such an anchor in that, you know, like, I feel, it's like always makes me cry when I talk about it because he's just, he's so amazing. Like, I wish the world could. He, like, doesn't. He's not a social media man. So like, he doesn't get to like get out there much, but he's such a gangster. Like, he's amazing. He's so great. And throughout this whole process, he's just been like, I love you regardless. Like, you could do. I don't care what you do. I'm here. I've got you. If you want to like, build a hundred million dollar company, go do that. I'm going to be right by your side. If you want to be a stay at home mom and do nothing, I don't care. Do whatever you want. And he's just been, he's been so amazing. And the portal of marriage has been alchemical for us. I didn't think it would because we were already living together, our finances were already tied in together, our families, we were so like intertwined. But there was something about like saying I do and just being like, we got this for life. That it's. It's amazing. You know, I, I feel like the right partner is such. I, I feel privileged. Like I thank God every day. Yeah. Yeah. It's a privilege.

[Julie Solomon]

And giving yourself the gift to have that standard.

[Samantha Skelly]

Mm.

[Julie Solomon]

You know, I think that whatever we're willing to tolerate that will always be met.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

And so no matter if it's relationship business, what have you, if there's something that just keeps being that spiritual sandpaper for you, you've got to really ask yourself, like, what am I tolerating here? And just simply put, raise the standard and whatever that is. 100. And so I think that the fact that you. There is a standard in your communion with your husband, there is a standard in your business. There is a standard in how you show up and how you connect and communicate and serve the women in your community that has. And it's all connected. So it's not just gonna be great over here and then a mess over there. And I think that that's kind of the biggest takeaway from me hearing you today is that you have just allowed yourself to reclaim and remember a level of God given standard that you are meant to have in this life.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah. Energy has no walls. You know, wherever you are, there you are. So thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[Julie Solomon]

Okay, one more quick question.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

Before we wrap up. Yeah, let's go. What does being a woman of influence in this stage of your life mean to you?

[Samantha Skelly]

That's such a good question right now. The answer that feels most authentic is living a life that is deeply aligned with my soul and not making any compromises on that whatsoever. Even if it doesn't make sense to the outside world, Even if it doesn't make sense to me at the time, which it often doesn't.

[Julie Solomon]

Right.

[Samantha Skelly]

My soul's like, go do this. I'm like, you're crazy. Okay. You know, I think there's a deeper level of soul attunement that we all get to step into that is going to free us all and liberate us all. And alchemizing the fear that comes along with doing that is being influential. You know, like, how can we meet fear in the face and go, I see you and I love you anyways and let's go. And that for me is everything, you know, and. And that soul curriculum, that soul alignment could be anything. An artist being a dog walker, it doesn't matter. But what is your soul soul lit up to do every single day and just go do that. And when you're doing that and you're being that you are a gift to the world, your vibration then becomes a contribution. And people see that and they're like, oh, my gosh, that person is so authent who they are. It's so not my path. But oh, my gosh. Yes. That's everything to me.

[Julie Solomon]

Yeah.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

Yep. And it gives other people the permission to do the same.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yes.

[Julie Solomon]

They're like, in their own way, they're.

[Podcast Host/Announcer]

Like, I want that.

[Samantha Skelly]

Yes.

[Julie Solomon]

Not exactly yes, but I want that 100 in whatever way it's meant to be.

[Samantha Skelly]

100. It's beautiful. It's such a gift to see that. Yeah.

[Julie Solomon]

You're such a gift.

[Samantha Skelly]

Oh, my gosh. Ditto, kiddo. This has been so great.

[Julie Solomon]

Yes. Thank you, thank you. Thank you for being you, for sharing and just being able to pour into this community. I know they're going to get so much value out of this conversation. And I appreciate you.

[Samantha Skelly]

It's a pleasure. Thank you for having me.

[Julie Solomon]

Thank you.