Shiva (4:08)
Yeah, so at a young age, I'm first of all, Persian girl in the South. So we'll. We'll definitely bring that up as an important. As an important piece of this puzzle. I felt very out of place. And growing up, my parents actually didn't have a lot of money. My parents came from Iran, paved their way, you know, and have made something incredible out of their lives here now. But growing up, it was. It was hard. And, you know, we were thrown into these very, very affluent, you know, schools and basically came into areas that I felt, like, very anxious and. And out of place in. And so that is really where I think a lot of the anxiety and ADHD symptoms etc started. And then I started my period and hormones started to change, and so I was diagnosed with, you know, PMS and heavy periods and all these things. And. And that's when my. My Teachers were starting to say, you know, she's not paying attention in class. She keeps trying to get out of class. You know, she's constantly asking to go to the bathroom. And so there was a lot of conversations with my parents that were like, she needs to be put on meds. And it was constant. And my parents were actually very against putting me on medications. But at some point I was like, I need help. You know, like, I'm having a hard time. They're telling me, there's a problem, let's try this medication. And so I was put on Adderall at the age of 12 years old in my development stages. And during that time, I really struggled with figuring out what that looked like. But what I will tell you is I immediately felt this sense of confidence and I went from class clown to teacher's pet, you know. And so that accomplishment for me and a household that really thrived on, you need to accomplish right, which is our background, the Persians in general, if, you know, Persians, you know, they're very, very, you know, career driven. And so from an early age, I was, you know, really pushed towards that world of working and succeeding and all of that. And so, you know, it was, it was in that time that I felt really good about myself. And so I kept on that drug. But at the same time, I was going to the hospital for panic attacks. I was really losing a ton of weight for being a 12 year old. Like, my appetite wasn't there as much. Like we were dealing with a lot of things and trying to figure that out. And so, you know, I continued on that drug through, you know, college. And at college is when, you know, I was drinking a little bit more. Of course you're on your own. And so you're like eating all these terrible foods, staying up late, staying up late, you know, doing all the things right. And that is when the anxiety and depression really kicked in for me. And so I realized, like, I didn't at the time realize that it was, it was the medication, but the medication was causing a lot of side effects with everything else I was kind of doing in my life. And so then I was on anxiety and ADHD medications. And so at that point is when I started to realize that health and wellness can help me through exercise. And so I got my degree in nutrition and exercise science and started to be, like, baffled by how much it would support me when I wasn't feeling well. And so that was where it, it started for me. When it comes to understanding the natural path to healing, then fast forward to Owning my own business and having multiple gyms. I found myself in a place where I didn't know who I was anymore. I was very confused. All my friends at the time were kind of getting married, having kids, and I felt very, again lost and alone in a body that didn't make sense. And I was starting to see major side effects at that point. I was having 20, 30 pound weight gain. I was having anger outburst. I was having such severe anxiety, I couldn't leave the house sometimes. And I had tried to get off of it multiple times before, before, and was unsuccessful. And the doctors would look me straight in the face and say, it's because you need it for the rest of your life. And so I was like, okay, I, I, I am the problem. ADHD is the problem. This is my title, right? I am this, I am this. Right, right. And I, I started to think this was my identity, you know, like, I am an angry person, I am an anxious person. They would try to put me in Dale Carnegie training for leadership, and like all this stuff. And like nothing was working. And so I finally just got to a place. I've done what I need to in Nashville. I am ready to make this major change that I know is going to be really hard and I want to do it. And so I decided to, you know, move to California, leave the businesses to my business partner, and get off of three medications in a West Hollywood apartment by myself.