
Hosted by Imi Lo · EN
The Intense Mind with Imi Lo is a podcast that draws on philosophy, depth psychology, and the science of giftedness and neurodivergence. Episodes feature conversations with academics, researchers, philosophers, and other rigorous thinkers, alongside standalone essays. The podcast is for intellectually intense and existentially aware people who want more than standard labels and simple advice, who want to explore what it means to live with a mind that will not stop questioning.
About Imi: imiloimilo.com
Eggshell Therapy and Consulting: eggshelltherapy.com
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Trigger Warning: The content of this podcast may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics. Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The guests' views do not reflect Imi's views. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers/

In this episode, I speak with integrative psychotherapist Joseph Pawson to explore the territory of his forthcoming book, Dependency and Denial, which examines what happens when our need for others gets exiled from awareness, and what it costs us to keep it there.We talk about why dependency is not the pathological clinginess most people associate with the word, but something far more universal, the very basis of how we relate to each other and to the world. Joe describes how, when early experiences of not being met are too painful, we can build an identity around self-sufficiency that works so well it becomes its own kind of trap, particularly for people with strong intellects or high emotional capacity, the very people who are most able to survive without letting anyone in.We get into what denial actually looks like in someone who is functioning well on the surface, the kind of person who can talk about vulnerability with real fluency but cannot let anyone carry anything for them. Joe speaks honestly about writing the book partly as a letter to himself, and about his own difficulty with needing others.We also get into a fear I hear often: the conviction that if you allow yourself to need someone, you will need too much and overwhelm them entirely. Joe's book Dependency and Denial is published by Karnac Books. He can be found at jpsychotherapy.co.uk.About JoeJoe Pawson is an integrative psychotherapist registered with the UKCP, with over ten years of experience. His approach draws on developmental, humanistic, relational, and transpersonal traditions.https://www.jppsychotherapy.co.ukThe book: https://www.karnacbooks.com/Author.asp?AID=26116Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com/Imi Lo: imiloimilo.comSister Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Zcl8ZUsu4AePugDoWtXcgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/eggshelltransformationsNewsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content to be clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views, and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The opinions of the guest do not reflect the position of this channel or Imi. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.c...

Full Transcript: https://eggshelltherapy.com/irritation/You send articles they never read. You explain things they forget by tomorrow. You correct them even when you know it will start an argument. And you cannot stop, no matter how many times it backfires. This piece is about why.Read by voice artist Theresa.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com/Imi Lo: imiloimilo.comSister Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Zcl8ZUsu4AePugDoWtXcgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/eggshelltransformationsNewsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content to be clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views, and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The opinions of the guest do not reflect the position of this channel or Imi. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.c...

Full Text: https://eggshelltherapy.com/existential-depression/Sometimes, you have a lingering, niggling sense that says you are capable of more than your life currently reflects.Perhaps you wake up with a quiet, persistent hum that whispers you are in the wrong city, the wrong company, the wrong room. You function well on the surface, meeting obligations and appearing competent, but underneath there is a constant awareness that you are hemorrhaging meaning, that something essential remains unlived and unexpressed. You watch peers announce promotions, publications, and prestigious positions, and feel a burning mixture of longing and shame at your own reaction. Does that mean you are somehow a horrible person to be feeling a bit envious?Existential depression in gifted adults can come from sensing the gap between your capacities and what your circumstances allow. It is the warfare between the part of you that wants to unfurl toward something larger and the part that has learned, through years of correction and dismissal, that your brightness is dangerous.We shame ourselves for wanting recognition, for caring about prestige, for imagining ourselves in contexts that finally match our internal magnitude. But what if the pain is not pathological? What if it is developmental, a sign of growth, and the seed of your next breakthrough? Psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut wrote about our human need for mirroring, for having our inner reality reflected back accurately by our environment. For those whose complexity, intensity, and particular cognitive capacities were rarely recognized or understood, the longing for congruence between internal and external reality is not shallow vanity. Continue reading to understand why your envy is a messenger, how the lack of mirroring created your current distress, and what it means to hold the tension between who you are and who you might become without collapsing into either denial or self-destruction. Note: Existential depression as discussed here is not a clinical diagnosis in the DSM and can coexist with clinical depression. Please do not hesitate to seek psychiatric input if clinical depression is part of your experience.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com/Imi Lo: imiloimilo.comSister Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Zcl8ZUsu4AePugDoWtXcgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/eggshelltransformationsNewsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content to be clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views, and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The opinions of the guest do not reflect the position of this channel or Imi. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.c...

Full text: https://eggshelltherapy.com/toxic-relationship/If you have been in a toxic relationship—whether with a partner, a friend, or a parent—with someone who repeatedly hurts you, gaslights you, or manipulates you, you may be familiar with the feeling of being stuck in a loop: betrayal, apology, forgiveness, then betrayal again. They repeatedly violate your trust in ways that leave you questioning reality itself, but then soon beg for your forgiveness with such raw vulnerability that your heart cracks open and guilt floods in. You stay because you think about your shared history, all that you are truly grateful for, and how good it would be if they could change. Then, within days or weeks, they betray your trust again. The shock hits deeper each time because the apology felt so real. The loop just repeats, leaving you increasingly confused, depleted, and emptied from your core.Most of us are so trapped in cultural stories of unconditional loyalty and forgiveness that we fail to see what truly lies within a toxic relationship loop. Even when you intellectually know that walking away is the right answer, that rightfully protecting yourself is not selfish, every time you try to walk away, you may feel haunted by guilt. We have all been shaped by years of cultural programming that tells us we are abandoning someone if they say they need us and we walk away. We are told that someone who tries their best should be free from blame. We are taught that love means endless second chances, that loyalty requires enduring pain, and that good people never give up on others. But ultimately, relationships without boundaries cannot nourish either side, and love without limits may simply be detrimental to both.If you have ever felt trapped or is contemplating walking away from something that is not working anymore, I hope this piece can help shift something.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com/Imi Lo: imiloimilo.comSister Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Zcl8ZUsu4AePugDoWtXcgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/eggshelltransformationsNewsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content to be clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views, and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The opinions of the guest do not reflect the position of this channel or Imi. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.c...

Full text: https://eggshelltherapy.com/gifted-trauma/On the Gifted Trauma of Feeling HumiliatedToday's article is on the gifted trauma of feeling chronically humiliated, even when no one is trying to humiliate you.You know the feeling in your body before your mind can name it. The heat rising when someone begins explaining something you already know. The sickening sensation in your stomach when an authority figure talks down to you, even when they are someone you perceive to have no real authority at all. The strange shame of watching someone else present your insight as their own. The way your body contracts to brace itself.You may find yourself re-experiencing this sense of humiliation constantly, triggered by what seem like the smallest slights. And there is almost no socially acceptable way to talk about it. It feels like a taboo to say you feel humiliated when no one intended to offend. You can hardly be honest about the daily abrasion of being too bright and fast for your environment.But the feeling is real. And it did not come from nowhere.It was planted when you were trapped in a body too small for your mind, in a world that moved too slowly, explained too much, and understood too little. You were told in all sorts of obvious and not so obvious ways that your penetrative insights were dangerous, your directness was hurtful, and when you excitedly shared what you passionately knew, you made others feel small.The first wound was the humiliation itself.The second wound, perhaps the deeper one, was learning to participate in your own shrinking.You learned to start sentences with "I might be wrong, but..." and "It is probably nothing..." You shave off the sharp edges from your speech, just in case they hurt anyone. You have become so skilled at reading micro-expressions, at catching that flash of discomfort across someone's face, that you retreat before you have even fully arrived. What started as survival became something else entirely: a muscular apology you carry in your body, a chronic self-betrayal you barely notice anymore.But... maybe the second half of your life is asking something different of you. It is asking whether you are willing to finally inhabit your brightness without apology, to stop protecting people from your full self, to risk the possibility that some will turn away when they see you unshrunk. Whether it is time to stop investing in a facade that costs you, as Mary Oliver put it, your one wild and precious life.In this fuller version of a previous essay, I go deeper into this particular wound of humiliation: where it comes from, how it follows you into adulthood, and what it might look like to finally stay in the room as yourself.https://eggshelltherapy.com/gifted-trauma/Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com/Imi Lo: imiloimilo.comSister Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Zcl8ZUsu4AePugDoWtXcgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/eggshelltransformationsNewsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content to be clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute professional consultation, psychotherapy, diagnosis, or any mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views, and they reserve the right to change their opinions. The opinions of the guest do not reflect the position of this channel or Imi. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken strictly at your own risk. For a full disclaimer, please refer to: https://www.eggshelltherapy.c...

SHOW NOTES:https://eggshelltherapy.com/podcast-blog/2025/12/05/why-we-still-feel-lonely-with-philosopher-lars-svendsen/ We can be surrounded by people and still feel completely alone. We can have friends, a partner, a full social calendar, and still feel like something is missing.I spoke with philosopher Dr. Lars Svendsen about loneliness. His work so brilliantly weaves together philosophy, psychology, and decades of cross-cultural research.Prior to this conversation, I did not know that...Norway is one of the most individualistic countries on earth. It also has some of the lowest loneliness rates in the world.People who see their friends every day report more loneliness than those who do not.Creating new social spaces and community events does almost nothing to cure loneliness.In one study, people preferred giving themselves electric shocks over sitting alone with their thoughts for 15 minutes.Loneliness, it seems, is less about what is missing out there and more about what we are looking for.I hope you come away from this conversation feeling a little less lonely. Or at least, in my own case, a bit more hopeful. Dr. Svendsen is a Norwegian philosopher. He is a professor in the Department of Philosophy at the University of Bergen, Norway. He is the author of several books, including A Philosophy of Boredom (2005), Fashion: a Philosophy (2006), A Philosophy of Fear (2008), Work (2008), and A Philosophy of Freedom (2014). He has a unique ability to communicate difficult contemporary and international topics straightforwardly. Dr. Svendsen has received several prizes for his work, and his books have been translated into more than 35 languages.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com About Imi Lo: www.imiloimilo.comInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/eggshelltherapy_imilo/ Newsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken at your own risk.

SHOW NOTES: https://eggshelltherapy.com/podcast-blog/2025/10/27/deathanxiety/I sat down with philosopher Tom Cochrane to explore death anxiety, happiness, and how we cope when existential dread surfaces. We began with the classic philosophical arguments against fearing death. For Tom, ultimate comfort does not require a cosmic designer. It comes from recognizing the world's intrinsic value. He advocates for what he calls "aestheticism," seeing the universe as beautiful, sublime, dramatic, and worthwhile on its own terms. This perspective is available to both atheists and theists. On self-sufficiency, Tom's critique is pointed and unique. A fully self-contained life becomes emotionally flat, he likened it to being like a ‘stale lemonade’. Humans are "contingent to the bone" and flourish through embraced interdependence and risk, not through isolation.The key insight: we have control over our imagination. Even when it runs away from us, we can redirect it and build better habits of attention. About Tom Cochrane: Born in the UK, Tom completed his BA (hons) in philosophy at University College London, followed by a MA in music composition at Birmingham Conservatoire, and then a PhD in philosophy at the University of Nottingham. His PhD supervisor was Gregory Currie. Following his PhD, Tom was a postdoctoral fellow at the Swiss Center for Affective Sciences, University of Geneva (2007-2010). He was then an international visiting fellow at the Sonic Arts Research Center, Queen's University Belfast (2010-2012), before moving to the University of Sheffield as a lecturer (2012-2017). After a brief stint at the University of York in 2017, he joined Flinders in February 2018. Tom's main areas of expertise are the philosophy of mind (particularly emotions) and philosophy of art/aesthetics (particularly music). He also has interests in metaphysics and ethics. He is the editor of The Emotional Power of Music (Oxford University Press, 2013) He is also the author of The Emotional Mind: A control theory of affective states (Cambridge University Press, 2018) and The Aesthetic Value of the World (Oxford University Press, 2021).Tom's latest book, The Aesthetic Value of the World: https://academic.oup.com/book/39016Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com About Imi Lo: www.imiloimilo.comInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/eggshelltherapy_imilo/ Newsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken at your own risk.

Full text: https://eggshelltherapy.com/ai-therapist/Today’s letter is about the elephant in the room for all of us these past few years: the use of the AI therapist, coach, mentor, partner, friend, confidant, and sounding board. You may be someone who has resisted it with full strength, or embraced it with excitement, or maybe both. Whatever your stance, maybe it is time we talk about what happens when we turn to machines for the kind of relational healing or coaching that has always happened between humans.All in all, I believe there remain irreplaceable aspects of human connection in healing work that have nothing to do with technological limitations and everything to do with what it means to be human, to suffer, and to heal in the presence of another person who has also suffered and healed. Whether we are talking about therapy, coaching, mentoring, or any form of deep relational work, certain elements can only happen between two human beings.In this piece, we will focus on those irreplaceable human elements. Just because I do not discuss the potential benefits or value of having an AI therapist does not mean they are not there; they are simply not the focus of this discussion.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com About Imi Lo: www.imiloimilo.comInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/eggshelltherapy_imilo/ Newsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken at your own risk.

Show Notes: https://eggshelltherapy.com/podcast-blog/2025/10/18/jessica-baum/Jessica, author of Anxiously Attached, returns to discuss her new book, Safe, which expands beyond her first work to cover all four attachment patterns: secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. Drawing on interpersonal neurobiology, she explores how early attachment wounds live in the body as implicit memory and cannot be healed alone. They require safe, anchoring relationships where nervous systems can co-regulate, whether with therapists, coaches, or trusted others. She reframes triggers as awakenings, inviting curiosity about what earlier wounds are being touched, and contextualizes people-pleasing as an intelligent adaptation rather than a flaw.Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com About Imi Lo: www.imiloimilo.comInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/eggshelltherapy_imilo/ Newsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken at your own risk.

Link to the full text: https://www.pecanphilosophy.com/writing/fear-of-being-unproductiveRead with a human voice! Eggshell Therapy and Coaching: eggshelltherapy.com About Imi Lo: www.imiloimilo.comInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/eggshelltherapy_imilo/ Newsletters: https://eepurl.com/bykHRzDisclaimers: https://www.eggshelltherapy.com/disclaimers Trigger Warning: This episode may cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, relationship challenges, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics, and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the YouTube Channel or Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics.Disclaimer: The content provided is for informational purposes only. Please do not consider any of the content clinical or professional advice. None of the content can substitute mental health intervention. Opinions and views expressed by the host and the guests are personal views and they reserve the right to change their opinions. We also cannot guarantee that everything mentioned is factual and completely accurate. Any action you take based on the information in this episode is taken at your own risk.