#105 John Clay Wolfe 07/15/17

Summary

The John Clay Wolfe Show – Episode #105 (07/15/17)

Podcast Date: February 13, 2026
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Co-Hosts: J.D. Ryan, Bobbo, "Turley"
Podcast Theme: The John Clay Wolfe Show is a wild ride through cars, sports, sex, drugs, and rock & roll—a high-adrenaline weekly window into Southern car culture, radio shenanigans, and unfiltered humor. Powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com, each episode revolves around live on-air car deals, offbeat stories, listener calls, and a steady stream of raunchy jokes and improvisational comedy.

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Episode Overview

On this episode, John Clay Wolfe and crew live up to their reputation for irreverence and unpredictability. The show focuses heavily on live car appraisals over the air, peppered with digressions into personal tales, awkward advice, celebrity impressions, and radio industry inside jokes. The team repeatedly circles around regional humor, generational divides, and the joys and pains of the car business, all presented with their signature rowdy, off-the-cuff energy.

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Show Structure & Key Segments

1. Catching Up & Circle Jokes

Timestamps: 00:30–06:00

• The crew banters about Bobbo’s absence from the liquor store ("They had me filed as a missing person Wednesday in my old hometown" – Bobbo, 00:58), playfully roasting him for abstaining from alcohol for a week.
• A long-running inside joke about station affiliates and regional stereotypes, especially "Walmart Country" and the process of turning in a wife for an upgrade at customer service.
• Gags about the prevalence of radio personalities in small-town Texas: "Everyone in the Wichita Falls radio market knows Lindy..." (B, 04:10)
• The team debates whether their audience understands the shoutouts to obscure Texas towns.

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2. Live Car Appraisals & Listener Calls

Timestamps: 06:10–56:00 (multiple intervals, recurring throughout the show)

• Structure: Callers pitch their cars and John quickly values them, usually with some back-and-forth haggling and jokes about the vehicles, locations, or caller’s life situations.
• Notable Calls:
  • JP from Bridgeport with a 2012 F250 King Ranch, negotiating a $28k deal. (07:23)
  • Caller with a 2013 Volvo XC60 from Mansfield, plugging the Volvo Club that meets at a Fort Worth tobacco shop. (09:46)
    • "So 13 grand buys the car. If it's nice, I'll buy it. Yes, that's a 13 XC with 55. Perfect." – John, 11:54
  • Lonnie Cole from Houston selling a banana-yellow 2008 Corvette, and listing a series of other dream cars ("I bought all the cars that I always wanted my whole life. As I got older. They're just sitting in the driveway…" – Lonnie, 13:51).
• Parental Repos:
  A mother tries to sell her daughter's Civic ("It's a parental repo." – John, 31:16; "Is your daughter angry with you about this?" – John, 31:35).
• Advice Segment:
  When a caller owes more than her car is worth, John jokes:
  "I think you take her to the strip club and walk her in there. [...] This is going to be you if you don't get your stuff together with being so damn lazy." (32:57)
  • The crew riffs on the potential backfiring of this "shock therapy," endlessly spinning what-if scenarios.

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3. Comedy Skits, Impressions & Celebrity Jokes

Timestamps: 16:05–104:30 (throughout the episode)

• Recurring Parody Bits:
  • "Let's Make a Dope Deal":
    A game show parody where Bob plays the part of a former Harvard philosopher turned drug dealer (Bob Bitchen).
    • "What made you drop out?" – "A lot of people think it was the 400 acid trips they took, you know. [...] But what was it really, Bob? – One day I played Black Sabbath at 78 speed, man. And then what happened? – I saw God." (18:05; recurring at 71:10)
  • God Calls In:
    Outlandish riff where Bobbo impersonates "God" as a used car buyer:
    "Thou shalt bring us done to me. Something sporty with a standard shift and convertible top." (19:09)
• Impressions:
  • Rush Limbaugh (approx. 62:16)
  • Tony Romo’s dad (100:06)
  • Satan/Prince of Darkness (91:41)

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4. Car Business Deep Dives & Industry Banter

Timestamps: 46:05, 51:08, 61:13

• Explanations of auction arbitration, post-sale inspections, and market dynamics for high-end vehicles (e.g., Lamborghini Gallardo, Ferrari 430 Spider: "You want to sell the car? [...] I'll definitely give 100." – John, 89:51)
• Details about high-miles and junk cars, parental repossessions, and live negotiation dynamics.
• John’s pride in online reviews: "It's hard to have good reviews in the car business." (70:07)

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5. Sex, Drugs, and Lifestyle Tangents

Timestamps: misc. throughout

• Extended chat about the Naughty in New Orleans swingers convention (41:13; 48:39)
• Bobo details his time living with "alternative lifestyle" housemates, including the pudding-cup incident (110:45)
• JD relates stories of wild success as a country radio DJ in the 1990s ("Fishing with a net… you tonight. I mean, it was like a rock star a little bit." – JD, 129:16)

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6. Audience Feedback & Cultural Commentary

Timestamps: 53:57, 121:12, 134:22

• The crew fields feedback about perceptions in "rough" markets, especially Austin ("I've heard a lot of people bitching, a lot of people complaining. Really? Yep, yep, they say we're too rough." – John, 22:56)
• Listeners from Austin and other areas weigh in on whether they're truly offended (121:25)
• Satirical "Top 10" segment: "Top 10 reasons we should be friends with the Russians" (75:47)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the car business philosophy:
  "I buy a couple hundred cars a week, and I'm just. Yes, ma'am. 10,000." – John, 31:57
• On why men build skyscrapers:
  "No, just the hopes that I might get that one last piece out. Impress some girl." – 05:51
• God as a car buyer:
  "And thine offering shall pleaseth me best. If it comes in eternal flame." – God (portrayed by Bobbo), 19:19
• On being a 'hobosexual':
  "Do you know what a hobosexual is? Someone that's in a relationship to prevent being homeless." – John, 49:49
• Bobo’s Alternative Lifestyle Story:
  "It was never as easy coming home as it was getting out in the morning, I'll tell you that." – Bobbo, 114:17

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Detailed Timeline Highlights

| Timestamp | Segment/Highlight | |:-------------:|:---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:30 | Crew banter and Bobbo’s sobriety jokes | | 06:10 | First round of live car appraisals (JP – F250 King Ranch) | | 09:46 | Volvo Club call and Fort Worth tobacco shop plug | | 13:51 | Collector car caller (yellow Corvette, 928) | | 31:16 | The "Parental Repo" call—daughter's Civic | | 32:57 | John’s infamous (bad) advice: “take her to the strip club…” | | 16:05, 71:10 | "Let's Make a Dope Deal" parody skit | | 19:09 | "God" calls in for a car bid ("Sporty with a standard shift!") | | 46:05 | Story about CarMax training video – industry inside baseball | | 51:08 | Discussion on high-end cars, lifted trucks, and auction losses | | 62:16 | Rush Limbaugh impression; car business and peyote gags | | 75:47 | "Top 10 Reasons We Should Be Friends With the Russians" | | 110:45 | Bobbo’s "alternative lifestyle" house story, drag parties, pudding incident | | 129:16 | JD reminisces about wild country DJ days—“fishing with a net” for romance | | 134:22 | Austin’s tightness versus reputation for openness—satirical cultural commentary |

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Episode Tone & Style

The language is fast, rough, self-deprecating, and unapologetically blue-collar. The crew is boisterous, quick to riff, and never misses a chance for an inside joke or risqué quip.

Sample Exchange:
"If you had the same garage world with A cups or C cups. Yeah. And you liked her the same, which one would you go with?"
"Anything more than a mouthful to waste anyway, you know what I'm saying?" – (John & caller, 108:08)

Listener Calls:
Mixed in are sincere moments—callers express gratitude for GiveMeTheVIN's service (Elter, 71:58: "You saved my life, man.")—but these are swiftly followed by theological or satirical "blessings" (Reverend Cleophas Jones, 74:31).

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Closing Minutes

The show closes with rapid-fire car appraisals, behind-the-scenes stories about car deals and misadventures, and a topical riff on Denmark’s cashless society, leading into wild hypotheticals about tipping, hookers, and personal hygiene.

"Do something. I mean, it's not like red and flame tips on the John Clay Wolfe Show." – John (145:23)

Final Moment

A Facebook/viral news segment (super soaker shatters watermelon at 243 mph—confirmed real) gives way to one last explosive redneck story before the crew wraps up.

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For First-Time Listeners

• Expect: Wildly unpredictable Texas humor, raw but clever radio antics, real car talk, and lightning improv.
• Skip if: You want clean, focused car business advice—the entertainment is as much about the personalities and stories as it is the deals.
• Don’t Miss: The layers of in-jokes, frequent callbacks to previous episodes, and the way caller stories are woven into the larger cultural fabric of the show.

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Jump to Key Moments

• [Live car deal: F250 King Ranch] – 07:23
• [Volvo Club humor] – 09:46
• [Parental Repo advice] – 31:16/32:57
• ["Let's Make a Dope Deal"] – 18:05/71:10
• [God as a caller] – 19:09
• [Rush Limbaugh (parody)] – 62:16
• [Classic car deal: Ferrari 430] – 87:29/89:51
• [Bobo’s “alternative lifestyle” experience] – 110:45
• [JD's wild DJ days] – 129:16
• [Austin listener reactions] – 121:12/134:22
• [Top 10 reasons to be friends with Russians] – 75:47

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Overall:
This episode is a raucous, layered slice of contemporary American FM radio—a blend of auto industry, Texas wit, and radio legend in the making. Come for the car deals, stay for the stories, and don’t be surprised if you leave humming the “sell us your car…” jingle.

Transcript

[A]

Foreign. The john clay wolf show. Phone bill is currently paid, so call at 800-800-radio. At 800-800 radio. That's 800-800-7234, or [e-mail].

[B]

If it's Saturday, it must be the John Clay Wolf Show. Good morning, everybody. J.D.

[A]

Ryan.

[C]

Good morning, papa.

[A]

How are you?

[B]

Front and center. Well, kind of left ish this morning.

[C]

You look good. You look like you feel better than you did last week.

[B]

I do. I feel 100 better. Man, I was sick this week. I actually didn't work on Monday.

[C]

There's a rumor, in fact, it was going around some of the liquor stores that you were not drinking.

[B]

I haven't had a drop of alcohol since last Saturday.

[C]

They actually put on an alert.

[B]

It was. They were looking for. They.

[C]

Well, the stock went down.

[B]

They had me filed as a missing person Wednesday in my old hometown.

[C]

Little Bottles of Jack with your picture on it. Yeah, I know.

[B]

I got home from work Wednesday afternoon, and I'm just sitting at the table watching cnn, you know?

[C]

Yeah, of course you are.

[B]

And comes to knock on the door, and I'm like, oh, thank goodness, the police.

[C]

Yeah, kill me.

[B]

Hey, Bobbo.

[A]

Where you been?

[B]

Old Marvin down at the liquor store said he ain't seen you since Friday.

[C]

That's how they'd find you. Oh, really?

[B]

Well, I should. I should try and keep in better touch with my. My liquor store proprietor.

[C]

At least call him at least. Hey, dude, like your mom, you're not gonna be there.

[B]

He said my Jack Daniels distributor wept openly like a child. Oh, man.

[C]

And, Michael, your week good?

[A]

Yeah, busy. Busy buying lots of cars. Give me the VIN.com.

[C]

Give me the VIN.com.

[B]

Ladies and gentlemen, Michael the Twister Turley, producer of this. It's gonna be, I think, a great day and a great day for it. Weather's beautiful here in North Texas. Houston's having an okay time, I think.

[C]

Yep. New Orleans, Oklahoma City.

[B]

Our friends out in the Arkansas.

[C]

Arkansas? Where are we on in Arkansas, Mike?

[B]

Fort Smith.

[C]

Fort Smith.

[B]

Isn't it something?

[A]

No, not Fort Smith. No, it's Fort Something.

[C]

I'd screw it up.

[A]

Fort Supner. I don't know. It's Fort Babo.

[B]

Oh, Fort Bible, right?

[C]

Yeah, I'd fight for that.

[A]

Fort Golden Riches. Fayetteville. Northwest.

[C]

Fayetteville.

[A]

It goes into Walmart country.

[B]

That's a big mark.

[A]

The home of the Prevost. The home of the house boat man. The home of the fake boob job. The home. The younger wife. Walmart country better be Paying good money. Turn her in. Get a new one. Take it. Take her to customer service.

[C]

I just bought this five years old.

[A]

I just married this seven. No problem, sir. We understand. She's a pain in the ass.

[B]

Here, here's a new one.

[A]

Next.

[B]

And here's a can of tiny shrimp.

[A]

They didn't even ask me what was wrong.

[C]

I didn't even need a receipt.

[B]

That's your bait? Now don't lose it. I've been talking to a fin. Fine woman in Wichita Falls that knows Lindy personally.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And tell us who Lindy is.

[B]

And it was that Lindy Parr. Is that. Well, you tell us.

[A]

Yes, just keep going.

[B]

He's a radio professional like ourselves that we know in the Wichita Falls market. And I, you know, in talking on PlentyOfFish.com. here's your little plug. We come around to the fact that I'm in radio and I worked in Wichita Falls, you know, she said, oh, so you must know Lindy. Kind of cryptic, like, feeling me out. I worked with Lindy for years. Like 15 years we worked together.

[A]

The Knox City Knox knocker.

[B]

Yeah. And I thought, well, what's going on, cuz? Lindy's a married guy. We worked it out. Anyway, she knows him personally from years ago.

[A]

And where's the p. Okay, so I'm just gonna wear you out on this one in front of everybody.

[B]

Go ahead.

[A]

So you just drug us down this road to what? Where's the water? Where's the food? Where's the chow?

[B]

Okay, you know how Buffett.

[A]

Where's the punchline?

[B]

Yeah, Buffett always says, everybody's got a cousin in Miami.

[C]

Yeah, that's a song everyone.

[B]

Everyone in the Witchita radio market knows, Lindy.

[A]

Dude, half the people. 87% of the people that are listening to you right now don't even know where Wichita Falls is.

[C]

I'd go with 93%.

[B]

Well, so what? You know what Lindy would say? You know what Lydia would say to that? No, Will, what of it?

[A]

All right, 800-800-723-4. 808. Remind me to get here early. 808. What? I think Bobo right there was just plugging Lindy for some reason. There's something there. Like he told Lindy, hey, I'm going to talk about you for about two minutes. But Bobbo didn't even keep up enough with what's going on to realize that we're not even on that station yet until 9.

[B]

Dude, this is a great girl.

[A]

Oh, that setting the table up for something?

[C]

No, no, no, no. It's about the girl. He did the radio tie in to bring the girl into it to plug the girl. She's listening. Yeah, that's what's going on.

[A]

She's not. Bob. We don't start on the bear up there till 9.

[B]

92.

[C]

5 KZPS reaches Wichita Falls. She's listening. That's what's going on.

[A]

Oh. Oh, that he does make the ground, doesn't it? That P is what? You know, that's why that gravitational pull. Pull starts with a P. It makes the world go around. It really does.

[B]

So does Pluto.

[A]

You know, an old guy told me one time. Oh man, I'm building this. How do I say this on the radio without getting in trouble?

[C]

Probably can.

[A]

He's building a skyscraper. Look.

[C]

Building a big building.

[A]

And he's an old fashioned old guy, you know. 78.

[C]

78.

[A]

You know why I'm doing that? Boy, why am I building that business? Well, you know why I want to do that?

[C]

Why don't do that.

[A]

Because I was like. Want to, you know, make more money for your grandchildren or to decorate the skyline of Dallas? No, just the hopes that I might get that one last piece out. Impress some girl.

[C]

There's my building right there.

[D]

Get on it.

[A]

True. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Good morning. You're on the air. King Ranch, you're on the air. Hang on. Good morning. You're there.

[E]

Can you hear me?

[A]

I can hear you. Who's this?

[E]

Be right. This is JP. JP yes, sir.

[A]

JP Mendoza. Who's that? Okay, what have you got?

[E]

JP 2012 F250, King Ranch, Big 7 Turbo. Have a 3 inch lift on it. 35 inch tires.

[A]

I haven't even given the number out yet. Where are you calling from, jp?

[E]

I mean, Bridgeport Ridge.

[A]

Have you listened to us before?

[E]

A few times. Enjoyed the show.

[A]

Cool, cool, cool. Lifted. King Ranch crew cab does have a sunroof.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Alrighty. Four wheel drive, diesel sunroof navigation. King Ranch 12. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's 28 grand.

[E]

28 grand.

[A]

28 grand.

[E]

Will you guys take my vehicle off?

[A]

What's the payoff? Well, yes.

[E]

2385.

[A]

Okay, so 28 grand. Minus 20,000. Just call it 20 grand even. So I owe you 8,000. And if I do that, do I buy it?

[E]

Yeah, I think you're right there. Well, if you want to give me a little bit, I'll Take it.

[A]

No, no, but I'll come pick. I'll come pick it up. I'll send somebody out there, too, in Bridgeport and pick it up. So I'm gonna bring a check for eight grand after they verify the payoff. And we. We can't verify the payoffs on Saturday, so it'll be Monday.

[B]

Seven thousand.

[A]

Just go to.

[B]

Give me that.

[A]

Just go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Say, I sold John my truck for 28 grand. Here's the payoff information. Here's the pictures. It's a quick process. It won't take you but just a second. And then they'll come out there Monday and pick it up. Assuming that everything you're telling me is correct.

[E]

Oh, why wouldn't it be?

[A]

I mean. Hey, man, I hear you. I'm with you. Good. 800, 800, 7, 2, 3, 4. 800, 800. See, Baba, you started this country choking your chicken talk. And then we get one from Bridgeport. Hey, baba.

[B]

Well, that's. I mean, that's show business.

[A]

He knows Lindy, too. Oh, my God.

[C]

Went to lunch with Lindy two weeks ago at the Walmart.

[B]

You stick with me, John. Clay Wolf. I'll show you how to do this radio thing then.

[A]

800-800-7, 2, 3, 4. Good morning. You're on the air.

[E]

Yes, John, I was calling in to see if you would purchase my Volvo.

[A]

Okay. What kind of Volvo?

[E]

It's a 2013 year model. It's the X C60 Premier Series.

[A]

How many miles?

[E]

I believe it has right around 55,000 miles.

[A]

Where do you live?

[E]

I live in Mansfield.

[A]

All right. North Texas. It's the Houston people aren't always South Texas. Mansfield. Yeah, that's south dfw. Dfw. I'm sorry, South D. You said North Texas. Like northern.

[D]

Part of.

[A]

You guys gotta understand something. Hang on. Hey, everybody. Is a group, J.D.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Okay, Bobbo. Hi, Turley. Okay, we're on in Arkansas.

[C]

Where's that now?

[A]

I got you in Oklahoma, Oklahoma, North Texas, Texas, which is DFW region.

[C]

Now I'm getting scared.

[A]

Then Austin, Texas, which is central. Good morning, Cavette. And then Houston, Texas. Houston's that big old Saudi Arabia of the United States.

[B]

Is that down south?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, down there, by the way. And then when you wiggle on over.

[C]

What happened?

[A]

You know, take a left when you hear the dog barking.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And keep going about 10 miles and there's dirt road. Beaumont, Lake Charles, Lafayette, Baton Rouge.

[B]

No, downtown.

[A]

Cross Louisiana. So over. Yeah, I'm nervous. When you start moving on up and you hit Shreveport, texarkana. We're on 17 stations.

[C]

I ain't never been on this many.

[A]

Back to, Back to you, Mr. Caller Man. I had to. I had to give my. My co host a quick geography lesson.

[C]

Thank you, sir.

[E]

I understand.

[A]

Perfect reaction. How much is this pig? What's the story?

[B]

I understand a pig.

[E]

Well, I was referred by the Texas chapter, Volvo Club of America. We meet in Fort Worth at a tobacco shop in Fort Worth, and they suggested your site. I just thought it would be easier if I called.

[A]

No, no, it is, it is. Have you been anywhere else? Have you been to any dealerships? Do you know what you want for it?

[E]

Well, the club had told me that it was worth between 12 and $13,000.

[A]

Hang on, man. Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. I wanted to see this. The Volvo Club meets at the tobacco shop.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

What time and when I want to come.

[E]

Well, it's in Fort Worth. I'm sure they won't mind if I use their name, but I'm not going to in this case, downtown Fort Worth. It's a real nice tobacco.

[A]

Should I wear my mason hat, get.

[E]

Together and talk about Volvos and tobacco and stuff like that? We also update ourselves on the. The new slide rules have come out.

[B]

We need to be.

[A]

Oh, now he's being attuned to the situation.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

So 13 grand buys the car. If it's nice, I'll buy it. Yes, that's a 13 XC with 55. Perfect. I'd buy a lot of them. And that's right on the money. The Volvo Club told you, correct, for one. Yes, sir. Versus the banker that gives the customer advice based off of the banker's bids are always really bad. The Volvo Club. I think we should have the Volvo Club in studio next time.

[C]

It'd be fun.

[A]

It'd be very interesting.

[C]

You know, they're partiers.

[A]

Pipe smoke would be. Are we allowed smoke in here? Because they all smell like it, probably. Sure, it's fine. Good morning. You're on the air. Who's this?

[E]

Hi, good morning, this is Lonnie Cole. How are you this morning?

[A]

I'm good. Lonnie, where are you calling from?

[E]

I am calling from Houston, Texas.

[A]

Houston, we know. That's the place down south near the beach with the big ships.

[E]

Gorgeous, gorgeous. Really cool little place there in Houston. Houston, Texas. And I've got a 2008 Corvette convertible.

[B]

I've got.

[E]

It's, it's, it's a banana yellow. Very, very beautiful condition garage cap. LS2 motor. But I never drive it.

[A]

Understand? When did you buy it?

[E]

When did I buy it? I bought it about five years ago.

[A]

Did you buy it in the springtime or do you remember? I have theories on it.

[C]

I just.

[E]

It was an impulse buy. I drove by and I said man look, I'm gonna look so much better driving that car. And I've been there and I, I bought. I think it was, I do think it was springtime.

[A]

Yeah, it always is. So the guys, they get their vets in the spring so they can get their tail and then by come, come winter, come mid summer.

[C]

Yeah, you've had it.

[A]

They've. They've already loaded their stuff and they're like ready to get into the four wheel drive to get ready for their thicker, thicker boned woman for the winter time to help them split wood they start shopping for trucks. Yeah, get her, get her.

[E]

Yeah. It just sits in the driveway and it seems like, you know, I played with the Matchbox cars when I was little.

[A]

So Tony Mo.

[E]

I bought all the cars that I always wanted my whole life. As I got older. They're just sitting in the driveway and you laugh. I got a 928 as like Tony Montana because I was.

[A]

I love 928. Is it an S?

[E]

It's a, it's a coupe. It was the old drummer of April Wine's car.

[A]

Just between you and me baby Our love will always be that drummer.

[E]

83, black on black. Beautiful, beautiful car. And I've got the convertible jack because.

[A]

I just had blah blah blah blah.

[E]

The first, the first year, the new body, you know, the 740. When it came out in 2001 I had to have it.

[A]

So how many miles are on the Corvette?

[E]

And I did buy a CLK55 because it was supposed to be the fastest Mercedes, you know, blah blah blah.

[A]

How many miles are on the Corvette, huh? And it's just hang up on him. Holy cow.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I like all the cars he has. So here's what I'd like for you to do. Go to givemetheven.com and load all those ones up that you want to sell. Because I like you played with matchboxes and Hot Wheels and everything you were naming. I really like a lot. I have the same emotional ties to all these cars. But we only have four hours today and you were pushing the limits on our time.

[B]

Absolutely. Well, you get in pace with me sometimes.

[D]

No.

[A]

Bob, no. So what do you do with this girl you met off Match?

[C]

What do I do?

[B]

Well, we're talking right now. I'm taking her to the Don Henley show next Saturday night. That's a pretty good.

[A]

Did you get tickets? Yeah, I've been bugging. Did I get tickets?

[B]

I've had tickets for five months, dude.

[A]

I thought I had tickets. I've told them 100 times to give it. James, if you're listening, where's my damn tickets?

[B]

They just opened up new sections yesterday. They keep moving the stage further back.

[A]

Don Henley. Don Henley's here in the studio with us. I didn't realize you were coming in, Don. Good morning. My God, we're almost out of time, Don. And I know you demand attention.

[B]

First of all, I thought it would be appropriate to ask.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Why?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Are you bidding cars? And secondly, we can do this without Glenn. We got Vince Gill, the biggest country star in the.

[C]

The world. Yeah, in the world. World. He is big.

[B]

It's gonna be a last resort of great eagleness again. Eagles will fly again.

[C]

See what you did?

[B]

If I can keep Joe Walsh off the cocaine, I could do anything clean.

[A]

Doug, can you take us out to break? Because we're. I see the big red light blinking at me.

[B]

What the hell do I care? Y' all stay around. John Clay Wolf will probably be back in a second.

[A]

Is that all right?

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf Show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com [e-mail], not only do they have an automated system that will bid your car instantly, but they will come to your house, office, wherever, and pick it up with a check. They're fast, they're over the phone, and they come to you like a pizza delivery boy. If they don't beat a written CarMax offer, they owe you 100 bucks. That's how much they believe in what they're doing. GiveMeTheVin.com is the best wholesale site to sell your car to, and it's not even close.

[B]

Sell us your car.

[A]

Give me the VIN Do.

[B]

So easy you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

And now it's time for America's favorite daytime fun show, let's Make a Dope Deal. Yes, let's Make a Dope Deal. Where young pushers try to parlay their stash into that really big connection and jump up into dealerhood. And our first contestant today on let's Make a Dope Deal is former head of the philosophy department at Harvard University. He is the holder of a PhD, an MA a BA and is a BMF besides. Would you please Give a big warm welcome for Bob Bitchen. Come on, let's have a hand for Bob Bitchen. Here he is, all the way from Harvard, Bob Mitchin. Well, it's really great to have you on the show tonight, Bob. How you doing? Bitching, bitching. It isn't that far out and solid and right on, Bob. Tell us, Bob, here's the question I ask of all our contestants. What made you drop out?

[C]

Well, a lot of people think it was the 400 acid trips they took, you know.

[A]

Uh huh. But what was it really, Bob?

[B]

One day I played Black Sabbath at 78 speed, man.

[A]

And then what happened?

[E]

I saw God.

[A]

The John Clay Wolf Show. Call at 800800 RADIO. At 800-800 RADIO. That's 800-800-7234. Or online at givemethevin.com Bob, you're here in the studio with us.

[B]

Yeah, man.

[A]

You saw God?

[B]

He ain't talking, boy. Man, hey, you don't believe me?

[A]

No.

[B]

There he is right there, man.

[A]

God.

[B]

John Clay Wolf.

[C]

Oh my God.

[A]

We got.

[C]

Literally we've got God here on here.

[B]

I am the Lord thy God.

[A]

Well, thank you for coming in today, Jesus.

[B]

The alpha and the omega.

[C]

God. It's not Jesus.

[E]

Jesus.

[A]

Oh, that's right. Sorry.

[B]

Jesus. Thou shalt bring us done to me. Something sporty. Sporty with a standard shift and convertible top.

[C]

Why would God want a car?

[B]

And thine offering shall pleaseth me best. If it comes in eternal flame.

[C]

Red eternal flame.

[B]

And I shall bring unto thee a multitude of righteous and wise chariot owners who will praise thine fair dealing. Yea, verily I say unto you, they wilt deliver unto thine. Givemethe vin.com website. As many market ready vehicles as thou findest grains of sand in thine swimsuit.

[C]

I never.

[A]

After a day at the beach endorsed by God himself.

[C]

Telling you, man, I never knew how close Charlton Heston was in the Ten Commandments.

[A]

It's almost as good as that other company that's using Pudge Rodriguez as their spokesman.

[C]

Yeah, you don't have any of those old folks, God. Almost as good.

[B]

And they shall. Everyone possesseth glorious readiness to sell.

[C]

Ready?

[B]

And I shall tweak their frequency.

[C]

What?

[B]

That they will pummel thee without end like June bugs to a yellow porch light. So saith the Lord thy God.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Thanks, man. Oh, you won.

[A]

Thank you, God. Thanks for your pal.

[C]

Dude. John had no idea you got friends in.

[A]

He was talking over Ozzy in Black Sabbath.

[C]

How appropriate. He didn't care.

[A]

Oh, they still honored him.

[C]

Ozzy's one of God.

[A]

O2 Chevy Malibu. 155, 000 miles. Justin? Justin. Oh. Callers out. Justin, you there?

[E]

Hello?

[A]

Hey. O2 Chevy Malibu with a bunch of miles on it. Do you. Do y'. All. Do y' all have a. Do you live in apartment complex?

[E]

No, I live in a trailer park.

[A]

Do y' all have one of those great big dumpsters, like a community dumpster in the trailer park?

[E]

Regular size, not one of the giant ones. Why, you want something to throw it in the trash?

[A]

Yeah, I was gonna see if you and your buddies want to get some beers. Just pick it up, throw it in the dumpster and save everybody some money.

[B]

Three body styles back.

[A]

He saw it coming. Why you gonna tell me to drive it off in the swimming pool? Good morning. You're on the air.

[E]

Yeah, John.

[A]

Yes, sir.

[E]

Yeah, I got a 07 Harley Davidson fat boy fully loaded. Y' all buy a motorcycle?

[A]

We do. We do, but we do it online because I have a motorcycle expert that I send them to because I am not a motorcycle expert. I don't know the difference between a fat boy and a fat girl.

[D]

I'm a fat boy too, but go.

[A]

To the website, givemetheven.com and load it up and then we'll fire it off to our motorcycle specialist. He buys a lot of bikes from our listeners in RVs, too. We buy RVs and all that. Where are you calling from?

[E]

Edgewood.

[A]

Edgewood? Where the hell's that?

[E]

You know what? You know where Turtle is? Yeah. Wills pointing in Edgewood.

[A]

All right, well, yeah, load it [e-mail]. we'll get you a figure on it. I'm glad he brought that up. Motorcycles, RVs, buses, coaches. I. I'm kind of out on the boat deal.

[C]

I wonder why. What could have happened?

[A]

John, Motorcycles. Yeah, we buy them all the time. RVs.

[C]

So you have somebody that kind of knows those?

[A]

Yeah, very well known. We have. We have inside like snipers.

[C]

We just had some of the new bugs.

[A]

Yeah. David, Crew cab, leather, two wheel drive, Sierra 10 model. Where you. Where do you live? 512. That's Austin, right?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

What do you think of us on this station? I've heard a lot of people bitching, a lot of people complaining. Really? Yep, Yep, yep. They say we're too rough.

[B]

Really?

[A]

What? Yep. David, what do you think?

[E]

No, no, you're all good.

[A]

We have one vote for us. David on in Austin. Mark down David. David's a lover, not a hater.

[E]

One mark it down.

[A]

A 2010 Sierra crew cab, two wheel driver, four.

[E]

A two wheel drive. It's got the 6.2 motor in it.

[A]

Would you mind standing like the middle of the road in Austin around Congress holding up a sign, you know.

[E]

Sure, yeah.

[A]

Like a little protest against the haters. We need some more support in Austin against the haters. In like that joke. I thought it was really funny that we said that the expansion football team was coming to Austin and the, the Austin and liberals, perfect. But the defense, they always lose because the defense could so easily read the play because the quarterback always rolls to the left and you know, and they got offended of that.

[D]

What? Yeah.

[A]

Yes, yes, yes. Hey, is this thing more than what color is it? I don't know if I'm allowed to ask what color it is in Austin. I mean, you know, that could be racist. Hey, is it more than 13 grand or 12 grand? 13 probably.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

13 grand. How much is it?

[E]

What do you. What do you mean? How much is it?

[A]

No, no, no, no. I buy cars. This isn't just a. This isn't a poke and feel. This is. This is contact football. We're here to buy them.

[E]

How much is it to me?

[A]

Are you selling this car?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Can I buy it for 13 grand?

[E]

No.

[A]

What? Can I buy it for.

[E]

16?

[A]

Too many miles. 106 on the clock. 2002. Does it have a sunroof?

[E]

No, it has a power sliding back glass.

[A]

What if I give 14?

[E]

I tell you what, you go to 15, 5 and we'll say I will.

[A]

Not get to 15 5, but I may go to 14 5. Go to give. Go to give me. Excuse me. Go to givemetheven.com givemetheven.com loaded up, up and say, John, hit me at 14 grand on the air. It takes 15, 5 and give me some pictures and we'll make a decision. All right, we'll email you back. 8008-0072-3480-0800-Radio. My name is John Clay Wolf. His name is Bob OJD Ryan and we buy cars on the air.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com John Clay Wolfe has been buying cars off dealers descriptions for 20 years and buying cars on the radio for 10. Why can he buy yours off a picture off his website gimmethevin.com because he can. That car, you didn't trade in that truck your dad gave you, the family truckster that aunt Edna died in. If you don't check with gimmetheven.com first, you may need to get your head checked. They're the best buyers on cars. They pay top money. And if they don't beat a written CarMax offer, they owe you 100 bucks.

[B]

Tell us your car. Gimmethevin.com so easy, you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

The John Clay Wolf show. Call at 800-800-RADIO. At 800, 800 RADIO. That's 800-800-7234, or [e-mail] what's the temperature.

[C]

DJ rock band currently 77 degrees. Mighty Father can find it, everybody. Green skies and blue lights to all you gals and guys out there in radio land.

[A]

Green skies, man.

[C]

It's supposed to be blue light Blue skies and green lights But I thought.

[A]

It was green skies and blue eyes yeah, Blue lights. Lights.

[C]

It's supposed to be blue skies and green lights to all you guys and gals out there in radio land what.

[B]

About a Marlboro Live?

[A]

The Rock Man.

[B]

A little break.

[A]

What's the name of the tool that makes the guitar sound so cool? From the dude in Boston tomorrow. Tom's.

[E]

Tom.

[A]

What's his name?

[B]

The Rockman.

[A]

Rockman, yeah. That's J.D. he's the rock Man.

[B]

Rockman.

[A]

Car calendar. All the cars turned a year older today. Why this week?

[C]

Today.

[A]

Just this week. Fourth of July. The new one's coming out, the 18s are coming out. If they're not, they're like five seconds away and everything clicks.

[C]

Let's make it. Make sure people don't think we're on recording. You said fourth of July, but actually it's two weeks later.

[A]

Agreed.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Is it two weeks?

[C]

Yep. Well, almost one week.

[A]

All right. Anyway. Yeah. So, like. And it really applies more to the newer stuff, like the 2017s. We start bidding them like 2016s. And the 2016s, we start bidding them like 17.

[C]

When exactly does the new model come out? Now.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

When the 18s are on the street.

[B]

They're built the 21st.

[A]

They're starting to ship them.

[B]

That's one of the four big Latin American holidays in America. Here we go. No, no. Christmas, Easter, Cinco de Mayo. And July 21, when the new Chevrolets come out.

[C]

I did not know. I did not know that. I didn't. I had no idea.

[B]

Everybody in the country knows that.

[C]

You're making it sound small.

[B]

Sorry. There he goes again.

[A]

Inside jokes. I had a friend in Florida.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

He's the general manager of Alexa store.

[C]

Alexa store, yeah.

[A]

And his used car Manager comes up to him, hey, boss, you mind if I buy this little twelve hundred dollar beater for my mama? Mama, this is so typical. Like the guy walk up to the owner of a dealership, like the trade for a car, right? Hey, hey, you mind if I buy that little trade in. I'm just a little 1200 beater, buy it from the mama.

[C]

Knock it off.

[A]

It's a 97es, right? You've got 1200. And he went and looked at it and he called me on speaker. He's like, hey, wolf, he was busting this guy's chops in front of him. He's like, yeah, I do mind. He said, first of all, I'd rather see you buy your mama S550 so that you have a little overhead and start working harder. Yeah, yeah, Nice, nice, nice trick. And then we back to the car and we got on the car. So he called me, said, wolf, what do you think this car brings? It was a 97Es, Lexus, old, old body stock. But he said, It's a 10 point car. It's the nicest car he'd ever seen. He said, this is the nicest old car, 70,000 miles on it, okay. And he told me the story in front of the guy. We started laughing. I said, here's what we're going. I will bet, you bet him that this car, if it goes at or above $3,800 at the auction, then he owes you and I the 1200. 6 and 6. If it goes below 3800, then he gets the car for free and we'll pay for it. Wow. And that boy wouldn't take the bet.

[C]

I bet not.

[B]

He knew.

[A]

He knew. Hey, you got my little beater. Whenever my guys from the. Give me the vin, you know, if we trade for something nice, we buy something nice. I. Hey, John, I need to talk to you. Can I just. I already know what it is. Hey, we bought this little.

[C]

Yeah, nobody wants it.

[A]

Nobody wants it. Nobody wants. It's in the parking lot, right?

[C]

Just said, I'm going to do your favorite movie, right? We'll get it out of your hair.

[A]

It's always the one that we got a little too cheap on accident. Well, they used to have asked me and I said, you know what, Just talk to John about it because I'm tired of it.

[C]

Yeah, I want to talk to you.

[A]

It happens all the time. And you're about to have another one. Somebody's going to talk to you about. Well, Aaron asked me last night if he could talk to me Is that what it's about? No. Okay. No, it's a different buyer, probably. Yeah. So. Well, I. I'm cool with it, but I'm going to look them up, and each one stands on its own. And sometimes.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I mean, I just price them to what? That. That Mercedes that I bought, I sold to Craig for $6,500. Five hundred over. That's fine. Fine. But I mean, if it's one that, like, maybe might make up some losses. No, we're not gonna give it to them.

[E]

800.

[A]

800. 7, 2, 3. Unless they want to help me with the advertising bill.

[C]

There you go.

[A]

That's what I always offer.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Hey, I was wondering if you could pick up 20 of my advertising bill for. Give me the VIN next month. How much is your advertising bill? 150,000.

[C]

You know what I make?

[A]

14. Honda Civic Coupe with 44. It's a. It says R. What the hell? Oh, rude. Roxanne, where are you calling from?

[E]

Rockwell.

[A]

Rockwell. 14 civic. 2 door is a sticker O Matic.

[E]

It's an automatic.

[A]

What's the story if I buy this car? What are you gonna drive?

[E]

Well, I. Well, you want to. You want to know the story?

[A]

Matt?

[E]

We bought it for our daughter, and she was going to make the payments on it, and she hasn't, so it's in my name.

[A]

It's a parental repo.

[E]

I need to sell it.

[B]

It.

[E]

No, it's not. Well, parental.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, it's a parental repo.

[C]

Yep. I did the same thing.

[A]

Yo, you hooked your kids?

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

Roping them dogies, tying them down.

[C]

He decided he was going to drop out of high school.

[B]

I went.

[C]

Guess what?

[A]

How old is your daughter?

[E]

She'll be 18 in a week.

[A]

Is she. Is she angry with you about this?

[E]

Pretty much, yeah.

[C]

Well, no, she's happy about it.

[A]

10,000. 10,000. Is it an ex? Yes, it's a. It's a. It's got a sunroof. It's 10,000.

[E]

You're gonna offer me 10,000?

[A]

Yes, I will give 10. Whenever I'm talking numbers. Anybody listening? That's an offer. I. I buy. I buy a couple hundred cars a week, and I'm just. Yes, ma'. Am. 10,000.

[E]

Okay, well, I can't do that.

[A]

Why?

[E]

Because I owe on it.

[A]

I owe. I owe. If it's off to work, I go.

[E]

And always I owe 13.

[A]

Oh, ouch. I'm sorry. Well, you better just shame her real hard and get her. Just.

[C]

Just.

[A]

Where do y' all live? You said Rockwall? Yeah. You want. You Want a break? This is a high risk deal, but if you want to break. Is she cute? John.

[C]

It'S the mom.

[A]

Is. Is your daughter a pretty girl?

[E]

She's very pretty.

[A]

Okay, so you need to, like, really. I mean, do you want to shock therapy or, like, make it work?

[E]

What are you thinking?

[A]

I think you take her to the strip club and walk her in there. See? Let me tell you something, honey.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

This is going to be be you if you don't get your stuff together with being so damn lazy.

[B]

Right?

[C]

No, the problem is it'll backfire.

[A]

She'll tell it's high risk. I said it could go either way.

[C]

No, no.

[B]

And then she's really good at it, and she makes $20,000 in her first month.

[A]

But if mom brings it up to her, then she won't ever do what mom says. She'll never do what mom tells her to do. Never. Reverse psychology. So it's almost like an insurance policy on the backside.

[C]

Gotcha.

[B]

That depends on the girl, John.

[A]

I hear you.

[C]

I.

[A]

You tell you it's high risk, man. I don't know. It might be bad advice. Rox, what y' all making here? Roxy, don't listen to me. I'm not good. I'm. I'm. I've got bad, bad advice. Thank you for calling.

[C]

That's okay.

[E]

I'm not gonna listen to you.

[C]

Good call.

[A]

You just lost listener.

[E]

Wow.

[C]

Take your daughter to a strip club. The worst advice you've given today so far.

[A]

Thank you. 800-800-723-4800. I was trying to scare into. Not get it.

[C]

I get a bit more the backslash. All she has to do is go. So what do y' all make?

[A]

It's high risk.

[C]

Way high. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, Bob used to work at a strip club. We finally got him out.

[B]

Sure.

[C]

How long did you work in strip clubs?

[B]

About eight months.

[D]

Did you?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Is it because people think DJs in strip clubs?

[A]

It's just used to work at strip clubs.

[C]

It's just the greatest place in the world. You're just surrounded by women that want you.

[E]

Oh, my God.

[C]

There she is. Hannah.

[A]

Hannah. Hannah. Hannah Bailey. Sounds like I got here in the nick of time.

[C]

So do you like the DJs?

[A]

Is.

[C]

Are you attracted, you know what I mean by that, to the DJs?

[A]

Oh, they're great. Boba would have been great.

[C]

Yeah, because he's directly associated with how much money you make.

[A]

Probably play old Steely Dan music. Oh, no, no, he wouldn't.

[F]

Maybe it's jazzy if you get enough cocaine, I'll say.

[A]

And how old are you?

[B]

22.

[A]

Do your parents know what you do for a living? No. Oh, they think I'm a librarian. Oh, yes.

[E]

Yeah, sexy librarian.

[A]

Do you wear flats when you go home or do you still have your heels on?

[D]

We don't wear shoes and text.

[C]

Our kind of no shoes?

[D]

No.

[A]

No shoes. No Internet? No Pizza Hut?

[C]

No, I have a pizza in. I gotcha.

[A]

You live in Texarkana, but you're always in Dallas Fort Worth? No, I live in Garland.

[C]

Oh, Garland.

[A]

What's in Texarkana? My parents. Family.

[C]

That's where the fam lives.

[A]

Lover country, come to town. So you came in from Texarkana. It's the typical story. Moved. Let me guess. Into an apartment in Arlington?

[B]

Sure.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Over by Six Flags.

[E]

I got off the bus and the.

[D]

Guy says, you're in the jungle, baby. You're gonna die.

[A]

Not really. Hannah, we're out of time. We have to go to break, and it's a hard break at the top of the hour. Can you take us out? Five seconds.

[D]

Okay, girls, wear your gunner on your left side and put all your dollars in it. And we'll be back with John Claymouth.

[E]

Okay, wait a minute.

[A]

Give me. Just give me, give me. Give me a break. A second. Two, three, four. One, two, three.

[B]

One.

[A]

A two, a one, two, three. The John Clay Wolf Show. Phone bill is currently paid, so call at 800-800-RODE. At 800-800-RODE. That's 800-800-7, 2, 3, 4. It's the Todd. The Todd Rundgren. Isn't he. He did something against Trump the other day.

[B]

Did he really?

[A]

Yeah, he stood up and, like, banned himself. He banned himself from the world or something.

[B]

He and Donald Fagan of Steely Dan have gotten together and released a song called Tinfoil Hat. Yeah, that's all about Trump.

[A]

Maybe I'll have a hit. It's only been 40 years. My name is John Clay Wolf and his Name's Bob O. J.D. ryan. Good morning, everyone. 800, 800 radio. Brent. Baton Rouge. Brenton. Baton Rouge. A 13 Corolla S with a roof in 5,000 miles. What color? Silver sticker. Automatic.

[E]

Auto.

[A]

Leather or cloth?

[E]

I'm not positive. I'm telling him she paid 21 for it in 13. So I'm thinking it's leather, because at the time she had had leather before.

[A]

Whose is it?

[E]

So that's not a guarantee, but if it's.

[A]

Sir, whose car is.

[E]

Was. My mother. She passed away.

[A]

I'm sorry. Does she live in bed.

[E]

That's right. Yeah, she did. We were visiting. It's just under 5,000. It may be a little over that. We're going to take her up to Texas to have her ashes spread. So it's about to put 1200 miles on the ground trip. So where?

[A]

I don't know. I'm not laughing at the. Your mother. I'm laughing at the fact that you're adding up like 500 miles. Like it's gonna make any difference. It's got 5,000 miles on a four year old car. It's good. It's all good. You know, that's too bad that you have to do that because did you know that the swingers convention is in New Orleans this weekend?

[C]

It is, yeah.

[E]

It would be good. Ice make a round trip.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, maybe. I don't know. If mom says she's not in a hurry, if she can wait for a minute and you can go hit that right. No, too soon, Too soon. Hey, hey, Toyota. Let me, let me bid it. I, I think it's, I think it's. I do like to buy it. I love the miles. Ss. It's an eleven thousand dollar car, sir.

[E]

Eleven thousand?

[A]

Yep.

[E]

I was thinking closer to twelve.

[A]

Well, go to the website. Givemetheven.com. it's my website and my system will automatically bid it. And anybody listening if you go get it automatically and just say it takes, takes 12 and let me look at it. I don't know if. I know.

[E]

I got, I got something else. I know I got something else for you. I want to. I want to sell two. I've got a 2006 Toyota truck as well.

[A]

All right. Is it a crew cab or a regular cab?

[E]

Just a regular little work truck. White automatic, off seat, just under 100, 000 miles.

[A]

Two wheel drive?

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

Around five grand. I need to see it though. Go load that one. I know that.

[E]

I know. Don't.

[A]

Hey, man, you know the program? Cecil 02 Toyota Starlet? No. 82 Toyota Starlet.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

Is that that weird Toyota that I've read in like Car and Driver that has some magical like. Yeah. Magical power. Somebody wants it.

[C]

It's black magic, Carla.

[A]

Or is it just a junker? I don't know. Cecil? Cecil? Cecil? Yes, sir, Are you there? What, what's this car supposed to be worth? Us?

[E]

Well, that's what I'm trying to figure out. Well, I got it from a customer of ours in our shop and basically they were the original owners. For a hundred thousand miles, they basically towed it behind an RV.

[A]

And the rest of it, it's an 82 Toyota 82. 1982 with 190 on the 82. Yeah.

[E]

With a 4Kc motor, 5 speed manual.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I don't even know if I'd give a hundred dollars for it. I don't even know what. I mean. It's just junk, isn't it? I mean, I think it's. I think the amount of money that you've spent of ours on. Hold on, our 800 number during the last 15 minutes is worth more than that car. But I don't know what it is. I don't know what a starlet is. I was. I was 10 years old in 1982.

[E]

Yeah, yeah, I can put a picture up.

[A]

I was more into Trans Ams. Oh, there's a picture. Oh, wow. It is a piece of junk. No, the call's worth more. All right, thanks. 800, 800. 7, 2, 3, 4. 800, 800. Old boy didn't like my joke about at all about go skipping the deal and going to the. Going to the swingers convention.

[C]

Here. We did it.

[B]

Dead Mom.

[A]

It started off, off right. He had a. He. He was chuckling in the beginning. But when. When, when I. Yeah, I took it too far.

[C]

You did. I was like, convention was.

[A]

No, but when I said, you know, she's not in any hurry.

[B]

Are there conventions?

[C]

Yes, it's happening this weekend in Orleans.

[B]

God, that must be a wild.

[C]

It's called Naughty in Nolan.

[A]

Nathan.

[C]

I hate.

[A]

I hate Oldsmobile bravadas with a passion.

[B]

Boy.

[A]

I know, and I hate you for having one.

[B]

I convinced.

[A]

Don't ever call me again. What do they do at this Naughty and n. What do you mean?

[C]

What are they doing? Swingers convention.

[A]

No, no. Conventions have, like. They sell things.

[C]

They do. They sell things. They sell.

[A]

What are they selling? They're selling things. They're selling experiences. Turley, I'm trying to get this out of JD Here.

[C]

Clothes, toys, books, videos and everybody. It's a great time at the hotel. A great time to be had at the hotel.

[A]

What hotel?

[C]

Oh, I don't know.

[B]

Any hotel.

[A]

How much is a Southwest ticket to New Orleans from Dallas?

[C]

It doesn't matter.

[B]

It's worth bucks.

[A]

Maybe I should call the old lady and see if she wants to go on. I won't tell her where we're going. I'll just tell her we're going to eat in New Orleans.

[C]

Naughty in New Orleans is the largest lifestyle convention for couples in the world. With over a thousand couples, this event is not only a full takeover of one of the French Quarter's biggest hotels, it takes over Bourbon Street.

[A]

I went down there for. I didn't realize it was homosexual Mardi Gras week.

[C]

Yeah. You didn't realize?

[A]

No.

[C]

That's what I told the cops.

[A]

No, that happened.

[C]

I know you did.

[A]

I went to SAID for gay Mardi Gras. I didn't know it.

[C]

No. There was such a thing.

[A]

There is.

[C]

Okay. And you. And you walked into some wonderful things on that.

[A]

I almost. I never, ever. I'll never. It's. I'm. I can't even talk about it. It's like one of this.

[C]

You should go to naughty New Orleans just to wipe that one out of your mind.

[A]

Maybe so.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Let's get. Hey, honey, if you're listening, call in real quick. We'll see if we can get a sitter. Kevin, a 14 Viper with 2,000 miles.

[C]

Miles.

[A]

What's the story?

[E]

Thousand, huh? It's got 8, 000 miles.

[A]

Okay, what color is it?

[E]

Original owner. I don't. It only comes one color. It's called. It's called matte. Matte. It's a matte darko.

[A]

Give me that in English. English. English. We're talking English or Arabic?

[E]

Matt finish. English. I'm Texan. Matte finish.

[A]

It's dull blue to call it.

[E]

No, there's no color.

[C]

It's.

[E]

It's like charcoal. It's. It's like flat gray.

[A]

Look. Okay, it's a matte gray. Bingo. That's English.

[E]

But it only comes one color. I mean, they only made 50 of this color.

[A]

Yeah. 8, 000 miles. Does it need tires?

[E]

It's number. No, I've always. I've never done no. Crazy burnout.

[A]

Here's what I know. Here's what I know. Everybody that tells me that Carol Shelby signed the dash of their Mustang. No, let me finish. Let me finish. Shut up. Let me finish. Let me finish. Or they start telling me it's number X of Y and this and that. I'm going, wait. And I give you my offer. Then you. Oh, no. Oh.

[C]

Crazy.

[A]

Let's go ahead and get that. Go ahead and yell at me now before I even price.

[E]

No, I'm fine with it.

[A]

Okay, so we. We have a 14 Dodge GTS Viper with 8,000 miles.

[E]

Yeah, and it's the carbon. It's the carbon fiber edition. That's what it's called.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

And it's. It's 607 horsepower. And it will do. It says it'll do 206, but I've never had it that fast.

[A]

How fast have you gone in it?

[E]

189.

[A]

I got a 911 Turbo up to that.

[C]

Where do you go that speed?

[A]

On the tollway.

[C]

Seriously?

[A]

Belgiumville highway, dude, anywhere.

[E]

I bought it, I bought it in Tomball, Texas and drove to Florida and I had no problem. When I got out of the road, Gone.

[A]

I don't know is the truth. I don't know.

[E]

I know a lot of people don't know.

[A]

I, I, I'm, you know, 50 grand and you tell me. No, I mean, would I get 50 grand for it? Yes, I know I would do that.

[E]

Yeah, I guess you would, right?

[A]

Here we go. Here we go. Well, how much is it?

[E]

How much is it for the car? I paid 155 for the car and I talked to the Viper exchange and they said right now it's a eighty thousand dollar car.

[A]

I called the Viper. Excellent. Hang on. I give 40 grand for a car the other day and I call The Viper Exchange. Right. 42. And I call the Viper exchange and they hit me at 37.

[E]

94.

[A]

Huh? Yeah. I'm confused. I just wanted to talk about his car. Yeah, yeah, everybody, he's got a cool Viper. I'll buy it. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. We spend baba. We spent too much time on that. It makes us look small.

[B]

I hear you, I hear you.

[A]

Well, that happens. 800-800-7234, patter.

[B]

I'm telling you the pattern. And people listen to the podcast later, they download it by the thousands, right. They say, wow, what a nice, what a nice easy mood they create, right?

[A]

We do, yeah. It's just that hippie pot smoking vibe.

[B]

Just like June Cleaver in her vacuum cleaner, you know, like I'm your vacuum cleaner, man.

[A]

Hey, ex Carmax people, if anybody has the video, their training video, okay? CarMax, few years ago put out a training video for their buyers, okay. Showing the wholesaler buyer relationship. Really almost like how not to get bribed. And I would love to get my hands on that how not to get. So, so they bring in these buyers for cars, okay. And I'm a wholesaler and we sell cars to people like carmax.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

You know, like the fleet buyers, like the corporate buyers. And he's like, here's what you don't do. And it showed a picture of the Carmax guy, like in a CarMax shirt on the beach, drinking an umbrella drink on his cell phone, talking to a wholesaler.

[B]

Hey, brave.

[A]

Hey man. Yeah. Got 15 Cobalts.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They're all green.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And they all got like, you know, 60,000 miles. I like them all. Bring them to me. Mama, don't do this right, that, that, that. If anybody has a copy that go, go to giveme the vin.com and click contact us and send me the email cuz I need it. I think that's funny. 13F250XLT with 109. Is it a four wheel drive? Yes. Cameron, where are you calling from?

[E]

I'm calling from. I'm right outside of Kingfisher.

[A]

Okay, It's a cloth rig, right? This, this F250.

[E]

It's a what?

[A]

Cloth?

[E]

Yes, it's mid 20 camel interior.

[A]

It's mid 20s. I need to see it. Mid 20s. I need to, I need to see it to bid it right. XL's tees don't bring crap compared to lariats and king ranches with miles on them. Mid to low 20s. I need to see it. Can you give me some pictures? Yeah, go to.

[E]

Yeah, actually sent me a deal a while back. I just sent said craig from sendmetheven.com.

[A]

Yeah, give me the vin.com. yeah, what do you say?

[E]

Well, he never said anything back. I sent a couple of pictures over. I'm not right there where I could take a picture of the vin.

[A]

But I don't need a picture of the vin. I just need a picture of the truck.

[E]

Yeah, I, I sent a few pictures.

[A]

And he didn't write you back?

[E]

No. Let me check real, Let me double check.

[A]

If he didn't write you back, he, you wouldn't know his name. If, if he didn't write you back, you wouldn't know his name. Yeah, go to him. Go to him. You, everybody. That's the quickest way. If you go to givemethevin.com the system will bid the damn car for you right there. I mean I wrote the system. System. So you're getting my number. What you got?

[C]

Dude, I'm just laughing at naughty in New Orleans dot com. I'm reading about it. What, what do you do at a swingers convention? They have theme nights now. Every night has a special sexy theme night where you'll find erotic costumes, people, body painted, sexy clubware, lingerie, and of course the famous Mardi Gras masquerade ball. How about classes and workshop?

[E]

Masquerade ball. Be a good one.

[C]

Classes, seminars and workshops every day that make the US the largest lifestyle education program in the world. They offer free classes on tantra, communication skills, bdsm, photography, massage and much more. Hurry.

[B]

Are you excited?

[C]

As you said, not naughty. Nance.

[A]

I've never heard of this.

[C]

How did I miss this?

[A]

Why don't you load up the honey and go down south?

[C]

Oh, dude, I'm going to be here next weekend.

[B]

Bye.

[A]

You're an old swinger from way next weekend.

[C]

It's actually this weekend. I miss it.

[A]

Well, I mean, you haven't missed it yet. Southwest will get down there quick.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Point.

[C]

What time do we.

[A]

What time we see if there's any hotel rooms available?

[C]

I bet they're not.

[A]

You think it's a sellout?

[C]

Let me look here. Book now. I'm clicking on book now.

[A]

I think we can just stop the show early and head on down.

[B]

I see that part of swinging, though. You don't probably have to have a room in the hotel.

[C]

Well, you really don't, actually. That's the truth.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, free love, man. It ain't about ownership.

[A]

I just show up and just lay down. Just get. Do you know what you call someone who is in a relationship? Do you know what a hobosexual is? Someone that's in a relationship to prevent being homeless.

[C]

Oh, makes sense.

[A]

We'll be right back.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf Show. And be sure to download the podcast@john claywolf.com.

[F]

Give me the. Vin.com is so easy. Check out the new automated bidding [e-mail] John's money. John's bid is right there and we'll throw it to you right now. It's all automated. It's real time. You wait on nothing. If you're headed to the dealership, get a number from givemethevin.com first. If you don't check with gimmetheven.com first, you may need to get your head checked. He's John Clay Wolfe and he's the largest wholesaler in the Southwest.

[B]

Sell us your car. Givemetheven.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show. Call them toll free. 1, 800, 800 radio. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf Show. Did I tell you that Lamborghini got arbitrated, Turley? We had to cut it back eight grand. No. Yeah.

[C]

How much was it to begin with?

[A]

We gave 70 and it sold for 80. But then we had to cut it back because it had a problem. See, at the auctions, you have a post sale inspection and an arbitration schedule. Schedule.

[C]

They look at it.

[A]

So it failed post sale and so the Buyer could have withdrawn, but we readjusted back eight. Yeah.

[B]

What kind of problem can you have? I can't imagine.

[C]

Lamborghini.

[A]

Yeah. I mean anything could be anything. Yeah. Transmission.

[B]

I mean every problem's like a forty thousand dollar problem.

[A]

Right, right, right, right, right. It's 06 Gallardo, but we've been buying a lot of hundred grand kind of stuff.

[C]

Is that the big car of the week?

[A]

It was.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Until it got cut like steering still 70s. I don't know. Big car of the week. Oh, my name is John Clay wolf. His name's J.D. ryan Bobbo.

[C]

Good morning, Mike.

[A]

Turley around the boards. Big car of the week. Lifted diesel trucks. We've been doing well with for sure. That's really. What. If I could just buy lifted diesel trucks, I would, I would go shopping because we. That, that's what everybody wants. Trucks, trucks, trucks, trucks, trucks, trucks. And in the heavy cars, the 100 grand, the expensive stuff, I like that too because not many people, not as much competition and the ones that you're competing against, everybody's like, man, if I'm going to put 100 or 200 grand in one, I'm going to buy it where I like it and guess what? Go kiss my ass. You could kiss, kiss, kiss my ass if you don't like it. So you don't have to stretch out as far.

[C]

That's true. That makes sense.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

If you're buying the of car, it's.

[A]

Like buying a house, right? It's like buying a house.

[C]

It is buying a house.

[A]

800, 800 radio. Good morning, you're on the air.

[E]

Hey, good morning. I have a 2012 Dodge SRT.

[A]

Which one? Okay, wait, 12? They made it in 12. I thought they.

[E]

That was their last year.

[A]

Okay, so it's a Viper truck.

[E]

No, it's not the Viper truck. It's. It doesn't have the V10.

[A]

Okay. All right, so it's just the SRT. Is it called SRT10 or SRT8?

[E]

No, sir. Eight, eight. I'm sorry. SRT8.

[A]

Does it have a hot rod motor?

[E]

Yes, it's got the 372.

[A]

Okay, which is the 6 1.

[E]

Which is the 6 1? Not the 5? 7.

[A]

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. I don't think I know. Is it a four door or a.

[E]

Yes, four door.

[A]

What color?

[E]

Two wheel drive? White.

[A]

What color? White, white, white, white. I don't know this one off the top of my head. I'm sitting here scrolling through some stuff trying to get a. I don't see it. I need the VIN number. Can you go to the website and load it up? I. I love the truck, by the way. I want to buy it. I buy these all the time, but I want to hit you, right? And I'm. I don't know how many miles are on it.

[C]

It's.

[E]

I'm. I'm in it right now, and it's got 84, 340.

[A]

Just off the top of my head, around 20 grand. But I need to. I need the. I need the VIN number. I for sure need the VIN number because all these trucks I've had are Viper trucks, and this isn't a Viper truck.

[E]

No, sir, it's not. I wish I had a Viper truck, but.

[A]

Well, they've been going to givemethevin.com and load it up. Yes, J.D.

[C]

Load it up.

[A]

What do you want? Why are you looking at me like that?

[C]

Looking at you? I. I didn't know if you wanted to do a real or Facebook folly story.

[A]

Sure.

[C]

This is a fun one, actually, this week. All right, so this is. I'm gonna get a headline. You gotta tell me, is this a real story or is this something that's bumping around Facebook? That's just noise. Nonsense. New Texas law will allow open carry of knives and swords. There's a new Texas law? Is this real or is this fake? New Texas law will allow open carry of knives, knives, and swords.

[A]

Is knives. Are knives illegal now?

[C]

Well, this is the new now it's law that you can actually carry knives and swords open. I'm gonna say yes, you're gonna say it's real. Anyone else?

[B]

I think it's already legal.

[C]

Not true.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Beginning September 1st, it will be. However, citizens of the Lone Star State will be able to carry knives, daggers, swords, spears, and bowie knives in. In the open. I saw a guy stop and go. The other not stop and go. A quick trip the other night carrying a. Carrying a. A large gun. Just like, dude, just put a shirt on and no one wants to see.

[A]

I lived half of my life in the country. I've seen it all. But they've been carrying knives and swords and whiskey, but not swords. And what about big ax spears? Can you carry a big ax?

[B]

I like to bring my ax when I go out. Strip club.

[C]

It's literally called the Texas knife Law. Reform.

[B]

You never know. And I've got a killer dwarf.

[A]

I was at the lpmx. I was at the lpmx.

[B]

What is that?

[A]

The feed store.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Out where we live. I used to ride my motorcycle there when I Was seven. Okay. It's about five miles up the road. Yeah. And we had a charge count the LPMX old bills. Somebody needs to do a country album called lpmx. Lonesome Prairie Mercantile Exchange. And there was some meth head that walked in there that had a sword strapped on his back.

[C]

Yeah, why not?

[A]

It was weird, man.

[C]

You just don't ever.

[A]

And he's like, hey, I'm looking for the so and so. And at the, at the coffee country store, you've got all the, the coffee guys and smokers sitting there on the stools that literally it's their country club.

[C]

Little boys.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, that's it. Take a right down there at the barking dog drive till you see the broke down dozer. Take a left at the Dozer TC yellow mobile home that still says Merry Christmas even though it's middle of summertime. But anyway and just go straight until you hit the cattle garden. That's the driveway.

[C]

Texas, you just never have enough daggers, swords and spears.

[E]

Right.

[B]

We'll be back.

[A]

Just a minute. My name's John Clay Wolf. 800-800-7234. Give me a buzz now. We're live or just go to give me the vin. But you can call in. I'll bid your car on the air too.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com John Clay Wolf has been buying cars off dealers descriptions for 20 years and buying cars on the radio for 10. Why can he buy yours off a picture off his website? GiveMeTheEven.com because he can. That car, you didn't trade in that truck your dad gave you. The family truck store that Aunt Edna died in. If you don't check with gimmethevin.com first, you may need to get your head checked. They're the best buyers on cars, they pay top money and if they don't beat a written carmax offer, they owe you a hundred bucks.

[B]

Sell us your car. Givemethevin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show column. Toll free, 1, 800, 800 radio. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf Show. Good morning everyone. It is 9:45 in case you listen to the radio instead of have a watch to get your time on a daily basis.

[C]

But I know what time it is. I can turn radio off.

[A]

My name is John JD Babo. Renee is on line one right here. Renee in Louisiana? What city in Louisiana?

[E]

Denham springs.

[A]

A 58 mercedes benz station wagon. A 1958. Is that right? Okay, go to, go to givemetheven.com and load it up and let me look at the pictures of it because I have no idea. But I damn sure can figure it out. I don't buy mini classics, but I think I would this one. Do you know what is supposed to be worth?

[E]

No, I don't.

[A]

I don't either, but I'll figure it out. I've got a expert.

[E]

The only one in the country. I know that.

[D]

Cool.

[A]

Please go to givemetheven.com we have a. Your denim springs. We've got a. A drop zone in Baton Rouge and in Lafayette. I don't know which one's closer to. I think Lafayette. Right. All right, I believe you, alex.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

11 Silverado 7 Silverado 6 liter LT2, half turn. So does it have a little red all terrain thing on the side?

[E]

No, it does not.

[A]

Because that. I don't.

[E]

I wasn't aware that was around in 2011.

[A]

Well, the. I know that all terrain always equates to 6 liter gas. I just didn't know if. Anyway.

[E]

No, it's got the same 6:2 that was in like the Hummer and in the Denali's.

[A]

Okay. 11/2,con crew cab 4x4. Does it have a sunroof?

[E]

It does not have a sunroof.

[A]

Does it have factory navigation?

[E]

No, it doesn't have navigation. It's got the backup camera. It's. And it's got the. It's got the full center console, you know, like the LTDs. The only thing it doesn't have that the LTZ has is the sunroof and the navigation.

[A]

Right, okay.

[E]

And the backup camera is in the rear view mirror.

[A]

Does it have 20 inch wheels?

[E]

Yes, it does.

[A]

What color it is?

[E]

It's like gunmetal, man.

[A]

Where you call it? What city?

[E]

Well, I'm in Conroe, but that's, that's north of Houston.

[A]

That's nothing. We've got a. We have a location in spring that we can pick it up and bring it to 11.4by for the six liters at eight. 18 grand with 80.

[E]

What's is it? 18 grand?

[A]

Yeah, I'm asking does 18 grand buy it? It's a 80000 mile truck.

[E]

No, 18 grand doesn't buy it though.

[A]

What do you owe on it?

[E]

Nothing.

[A]

Okay, why didn't that buy it? I mean it's got 80 on it. It's not 20.

[B]

I've.

[E]

I've had. I've had higher.

[A]

What's it take to buy offers than that?

[E]

It takes about 24 to buy it, sir.

[A]

No, not with 80. Yeah, I'm sorry.

[E]

I've had.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

I did, too. I've had a change of heart, and I actually.

[C]

I've had a headache for two days.

[A]

I mean, he. I may be a little light. And he. Can he please go to givemetheven.com and load it in? The system will automatically bid them. Right. Y' all don't even have to call me. Give me the VI N dot com. You put the VIN number and put the miles it takes. If you have your VIN in, your miles, your pictures, it takes 30 seconds to knock it out. And the system will give you a range offer right then immediately. Unless it's over 115,000 miles or over $50,000. Then it says our guy will call you back. But anyway, 800. 800.

[C]

They are working Saturday. They're in there.

[A]

We've got 18 people in there.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Have you been in there?

[C]

Well, no.

[A]

Yeah, it's grown.

[C]

I got to go in.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Crazy people.

[A]

Yes, sure. Of course. Love. I love crazy. We had a crazy store. We had a woman in accounting and a buyer getting a big old argument the other day.

[E]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

No one recorded it?

[A]

No.

[C]

Oh, you got to keep the tape rolling.

[A]

I know. Aaron's supposed to be doing that. Aaron Mendoza was sleeping on the job. He was in shock. His face was a little bit too shocked to hit record. He has to. He needs to get better at this job.

[C]

So it freaked out. Yeah. You got to keep it.

[A]

We have a lot of good drama that we could be posting to the show page. It'll be very fun. But Aaron has. We need recordings.

[C]

You have to let everybody know in the office that. That potentially everything in here is recorded. That way it's covered and you can air it.

[A]

That's fine. I'll do it anyway.

[B]

Well, they.

[C]

There's this thing called lawsuits.

[A]

Well, I mean, when we sent that buyer into Carmax, we told the Carmax buyer that on the air, that he was on the radio, but he was. He was so out of it, he didn't realize what I was saying. 800-800-723-48. Rush. Rush Limbaugh.

[B]

That's your impersonation of El Rushmo, John.

[A]

I mean, I'm just trying to gather it all up, get it going.

[B]

Oh, Tilly. It's nice to see. I dried up for a little while.

[A]

Yeah, you did.

[B]

My wife, Mrs. Limbaugh.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I said she thought I was Drinking too much vodka. Okay, well, there. Russians all over tv.

[C]

Yeah, they are.

[B]

You know, Tis the season, as I said. But I've laid off a while, actually, my friend Ted Nugent.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Was in your part of the world last week for a while.

[C]

Ted doesn't drink.

[B]

Well, now he's a teetotaler. But he does. Does smoke the peyote.

[C]

No, he doesn't.

[B]

Yes, he does.

[C]

No, he does.

[B]

He does with me.

[C]

No, he doesn't.

[B]

And we've been high to the bejesus belt all week long. We actually watched Apocalypse now four times in a row this past Tuesday. No, it's really a lot more serious film than I realized.

[C]

Do you think it was a comedy?

[B]

Geez, Al, what do you. What do you think he means when he. He says, who's in charge here? And the guy says, I thought you were.

[C]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[B]

The nuttiness of Vietnam tripped me right.

[A]

Out of my mind.

[C]

You didn't watch that?

[B]

We had to have little. A little drink after that.

[C]

I thought you said.

[A]

You didn't.

[B]

Just tiny, tiny. Not more of a shot.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

All right. Breathe in. Swallow. Breathe out.

[A]

Did your wife know that you start drinking again?

[B]

Well, she. Not really, no. I've actually been staying in Nebraska with Ted.

[A]

Are y' all bow hunting? Hey, I'm telling you, bow hunting. Little people.

[B]

You bet. Yeah, we. We've actually killed four goats.

[A]

No.

[B]

Someone's poor dog wandered up to the motel. She was a beautiful thing. But Ted says, you know, if you. If you can kill it, well, you should.

[C]

No, he doesn't.

[B]

So we did. We didn't eat it or anything. I wanted to. Ted thought it would be a bad idea.

[C]

It's a real bad idea.

[B]

How often do you see a purebred basset hound anymore?

[A]

It's out on the range.

[B]

Yeah, I can just. Those ears. Just crispy ears. You killed it anyway. But we reported it to the proper authorities. Walmart.

[E]

Walmart.

[B]

He called and said, that dog out here by the motel, just as dead, is the Democratic Party these days, crispy ears and all.

[C]

I got it now.

[B]

He's a great guy, Ted. He's a teetotaler. Like I've been for about a day and a half.

[A]

So what's going on with Russia?

[B]

You ever had the peyote?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

If you did, you'd understand Russia perfectly.

[C]

Why I said it. You got to be high.

[B]

The thing about.

[D]

Listen.

[B]

General Patton, at the end of World War II, after the battle of the Bulge, our hero, George S. Patton, right. Four star general, wanted to march all the way into Moscow, Right?

[C]

No.

[B]

And President Truman said, ah, let me think about no. If he'd done that, the Russians would be our best friends today. Well, we're on our way to doing that now.

[C]

We are actually Trump's canon, being buddies with them.

[B]

They're not so bad.

[C]

No.

[B]

Just because they're evil murderers all the way back to Lenin. Not to mention Marx.

[C]

Wait a minute.

[B]

But this is a. You know, this is not your grandfather's.

[A]

Marx wasn't in the Beatles.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

This is a. This is a new streamline Russia.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Have you ever seen that video of Vladimir Putin wrestling the tiger? No. I mean, well, why not be friends?

[C]

Okay, well, we should be friends with him.

[B]

I mean, when we are friends with him, superpower Ted Nugent can kill the tiger and then Putin doesn't have to worry about it.

[C]

No, it was kind of a thing.

[B]

Like maybe we can get him on the. On the ticket as vice president.

[A]

Do you think Trump is going to get what's going to come of these emails? In this meeting with his son, Was there an inside line?

[B]

No, no, I think he was just making a caviar run.

[C]

Caviar?

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And vodka.

[B]

You can't get good CAVIAR in Washington D.C. no, you order caviar, you get on the phone and you call Caviar.

[A]

R Us, all right?

[B]

Washington D.C. this has happened to me. You order caviar, they bring you minced oysters. Oh, no, it's not the same thing.

[C]

It's not.

[B]

Not at all.

[C]

Not at all.

[B]

Now these poor bastards in Washington D.C. they've never seen caviar, okay? Tasty. Especially on the peyote. You get a different kind of munchies with the peyote.

[C]

You are on something.

[B]

Yeah, we're eating blackbirds and crawdads. Did you know they're crawdad in Nebraska? Yeah, they hide under the corn. There's not there for millennia at a time. They're a little dry.

[C]

No such thing.

[B]

But tasty.

[C]

It didn't happen.

[A]

Thank you, Rush Limbaugh.

[B]

I think I could use a little peyote right now. Hand me that cactus over there.

[A]

Good morning. You're on the air, Mr. Pontiac. Solstice, you there?

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, eight solstice. We with 135 speed average. Rough or clean?

[E]

Oh, it's basically garage.

[A]

It's very clean with those miles on it. I think it's 2500 bucks.

[E]

Okay, thanks.

[A]

Yep. 130 work trucks. Brandon, I need work trucks to send to the website because I want to see pictures of them. There's too many variations. The ones that are dressed up be like XLT lookalikes. Or. Or they're not. It makes a big difference in what we do. If you'll go to givemetheven.com and load it up. And pictures on that one. For sure. I need pictures. Where are you calling from, Brandon?

[E]

Leak city. I got four. I got four of them. I got a dually diesel and then three gas ones.

[A]

Perfect. I buy. I buy fleets all the time. Love to do it. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio.

[C]

Good morning, I'm Gail.

[A]

Are we. Who.

[C]

What was that?

[A]

Hey, Charlie. I blew my damn. I blew my ear up on this stupid whip I've been hitting on the auction block.

[C]

Oh, you've been slamming the big hose.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Long enough. Bad hearing.

[A]

I put, I put. I take a napkin and roll it up and put it in my right ear.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I have a headset on. One eared headset. Like a one eyed dog.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Didn't Mel McDaniel sing something about that?

[B]

Yes, he did.

[C]

And when you get down your fiddle and you get down your butt.

[A]

Right. Well, you get down the fiddling, get down your hose.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And you slap it on the counter and you blow out your eardrums.

[B]

Really.

[C]

Loud in your right ear. And you're. Now you're damaged. You're here, I think.

[A]

Hang on. Play it again. Let's see if you can hear. So did you hear that slap? Yeah, but it's real loud in person. I need to do something different. I think I need to sponge.

[C]

They're like a dollar.

[A]

All I needed that. Or just put on a double eared headset because I'm talking to the Internet bidders. Downline.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Like. And anyway. Yeah. I. I really got a problem.

[B]

How about like a.38 snub nose?

[C]

A dollar.

[A]

Shoot it off.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You start shooting a gun.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

In the air.

[A]

It'd be original. Sell that 800.

[C]

Building with all the holes.

[A]

8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. You know, we lose money on these cars all the time and we make money. But the, the buyers in my lane know if I've got two people bidding on it, I'm gonna sell that. I'm gonna sell that or I'm gonna.

[C]

Beat somebody with this hoe.

[A]

I'm just, I, I mean, I had a jeep that we gave $38,000 to a listener right. Last week.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And it brought 35, 7. And I sold that on the first.

[C]

Packing, it had done better than me afraid of you.

[A]

You know, you have all the good Jeep buyers there, and they're bidding each other out, and it's like, the drama. I didn't get money on the thing till 33 grand. Wow. And it went to 35. Seven. And everybody quit. I'm like, you know what? You got a seller. Yeah. 800, 800. Seven, two, three, four. Buy them hard and sell them harder. 800, 800. Seven, 2, 3, 4. 3, 4. 800, 800. People wonder how long I keep cars.

[C]

How long do you keep cars?

[A]

I don't know, Terry.

[C]

How long do we keep.

[A]

The longest? If a week, you're lucky.

[C]

Well, that's a long time.

[A]

If it's over a week, it's too long.

[C]

Yeah. The car business, that is, though, isn't it?

[A]

No, no. I'm in the wholesale distribution business.

[C]

Okay. So how long are you. I think car business.

[A]

60 days is when they time out. Okay. I have them for. I say average six days, five days average. Something like that quick.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We're just moving commodities around, clearly. Yeah. But it. Have you looked at our reviews on the Internet?

[C]

No.

[A]

Damn, I'm proud.

[C]

Tell me.

[A]

Damn, I'm proud. You know, it's hard to have good reviews in the car business.

[C]

Oh, man. Because everybody hates.

[A]

Yeah. And you're doing this big transaction. There's so many room for air. You got to read our better business. Facebook, Google. I mean, it's. It's like, wow. And they all say the same thing. I'll tell you what they say when I get back.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And now it's time for America's favorite daytime fun show, let's Make a Dope Deal. Yes, let's Make a Dope Deal. Where young pushers try to parlay their stats into that really big connection and jump up into dealerhood. And our first contestant today on let's Make a Dope Deal is former head of the philosophy department at Harvard University. He is the holder of a PhD, an MA a BA and is a BMF besides. Would you please give a big warm welcome for Bob Mitchen. Come on, let's have a hand for Bob Bitchen. Here he is, all the way from Harvard. Bob Mitchen. Well, it's really great to have you on the show, Bob. How you doing? Bitching. Bitching. It isn't that far out and solid and right on, Bob. Tell us, Bob, here's the question I ask of all our contestants. What made you drop out?

[C]

Well, a lot of people think it.

[A]

Was the 400 acid trips they took, you know?

[E]

Uh huh.

[A]

But what was it really, Bob?

[B]

One day I played Black Sabbath at 78 speed, man.

[A]

And then what happened?

[E]

I saw God.

[A]

The John Clay Wolf show. Phone Bill is currently PA. So call at 800-800-RADIO. At 800-800 RADIO. That's 800-800-7234, or online at givemethefin.com how many years ago was that? When we had Cheech and Chong in the studio? That was a long time ago. Six years.

[B]

2009.

[C]

Say five. At least.

[A]

That was a good day. Good morning out. Miss? Is it Elter?

[E]

Elter, yeah, it's Elser.

[A]

Hey, Elter, what's up?

[E]

Nothing much. Hey, I was just calling to tell you thank you so much for just creating givemethe bin.com because you saved my life, man. Like.

[A]

Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. I saved your life? This is not what I set out to do. This is. This is. This thing has gone bigger than I ever thought.

[C]

Huge, man. You're saving lives.

[A]

Hang on. Else. How did we save your life?

[E]

Get it, man. You saved my life because my car note was about 500 bucks, okay? And you. I. I've been pushing you guys off for a long time, but I finally just. You said, you know what? Let me just call John Clay Wolf and see what I can do. And you guys. And it was so fast. I sent in the email. You guys responded to me asap. Next week, y' all came and picked up my car. The next week I got a. My car was paid off and I'm still getting a check. CarMax.

[A]

You're still getting a check from CarMax? What's that mean?

[E]

Yeah, like, I guess the overpayment.

[A]

But don't be talking about that because they may cut it off. So. So you sold it to us? I mean, if you're beating them, keep beating them. What? What? What kind of car was it? I want to see if I remembered if I've even seen it yet. What day was this? Was it last week?

[E]

It was about two weeks ago. Two, three weeks?

[A]

Well, yeah. Tell me about.

[E]

Was a H250 Hybrid Lexus.

[A]

Was it burgundy?

[E]

Yes, it was like blue. Burgundy? Yeah.

[A]

Did I give like seven grand for it?

[E]

You gave me nine grand.

[A]

Okay. I remember that one because we had another one last week that was burgundy. Well, good. Yeah. Cool. That's what we do. People think it's. You know, all the reviews are the same thing. I thought it was bs. No way. What's the catch? Now we're real Saving lives. Yeah, saving lives.

[C]

Definitely.

[E]

Really? I tell you, I appreciate it.

[A]

Well, alter. Tell me though, if I really saved your life, then, I mean, you need to. You need to do something big. So have you had any kids yet?

[E]

I have two.

[A]

Are you gonna have any more?

[E]

Oh, I don't know. Only the Lord can tell. I don't know.

[A]

I think if you have one more, I think you should name them after me.

[C]

Absolutely.

[E]

Gotcha. If I. I have it be John.

[C]

Clayton Wilson, Jr. Did you just hit a jackpot?

[A]

I love it. I love it. So, John Cliff Jr. Anyway, I mean, I think you and the ladies should get together tonight and make sweet love and see if we can. Jesus. Jesus. What? I mean, Lord. Lord, Are you here, Lord?

[B]

Lord.

[A]

No, it's Reverend Charles. Reverend Charles, will you give Elter a prayer to conceive this evening so he can give birth to John Clay Wolf.

[B]

Jr. Elton, this is your first line to the gospel. The Reverend Charles Cleophas Jones. Son, before you give all the credit to John Clay Wolf and his new religion, Ventology, you should think about more than saving your life.

[A]

Church of vintage.

[B]

You should think about saving your eternal soul. Lord, Lord, Lord. Don't forget. Don't forget to fill your pockets with the sales receipt. What you get from Jesus the Lord. Oh, fill your gas tank with the Holy Spirit, son.

[C]

Deposit, no return.

[B]

And that new little baby, he gonna live, right? He gonna live righteous. You can sell your car.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

To John Clay Wolf.

[A]

This is getting bad.

[B]

But your butt save your soul belongs to the Lord. Say joy.

[C]

Say joy.

[B]

Say joy.

[A]

Joy.

[B]

The Reverend Cleo Jones out. Praise God.

[C]

Praise God.

[A]

Casey k. Some top 10, Casey. Thank you.

[C]

On the other hand, looks like crap. Hey, here's the top 10 reasons. You know, we a lot of things in the news about the Russians. We shouldn't be friends with them. We maybe are. Maybe they're evil. Maybe they're dark. Here's the top 10 reasons that we actually should be friends with the Russians. There are top 10 reasons. And number 10, those Russian brides are just damn hot to keep those crazy dash cam videos coming in open trade. Because Putin looks so good shirtless, we need somewhere cool to shoot the next Star wars movie.

[E]

Number six.

[C]

Well, they do have a lot of big guns and bombs and such.

[B]

Number five.

[C]

As Rush Limbaugh will tell you, it's impossible to find good caviar west of Leningrad. You can't spell USSR without us.

[E]

Number three.

[C]

Because Vladimir will kick your ass if you don't. Four words. Russian girls in porn. One word.

[A]

Vodka.

[C]

Top 10 reasons we really should be buddies with the. With the Russians. Keep your feet in the ground. Keep reaching for the stars.

[A]

Casey. 800-800-72348. 800 radio.

[B]

He's the best, man.

[A]

Casey.

[B]

Casey's awesome, man.

[A]

Something's up to your mic, Casey.

[C]

It's a little light, my mic sounds.

[A]

And he's got it jammed all the way.

[B]

Sounds light.

[A]

Turn it up into you a little bit.

[C]

Turn it up into me a little bit.

[A]

Random. Randy. Randy the Chipmunk.

[D]

Hey. Gun.

[A]

Hey.

[D]

What was that?

[A]

You've become the most popular character he is.

[D]

Really?

[A]

Yes.

[D]

Yeah, I was thinking about that. And I don't want y' all to, you know, take this wrong or anything, because we're all friends, right?

[B]

Right. We are.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I've been looking at representation.

[A]

Oh.

[D]

Lately.

[C]

What does that mean?

[D]

You know what I mean.

[C]

Like a lawyer. Like a.

[A]

No.

[D]

No. Talent represent.

[C]

Agent. Yeah. You're gonna get an agent.

[D]

I met a guy down here at the Longhorn Ballroom the other night.

[C]

Okay. Yeah, he's probably not an agent.

[D]

Barry Gold.

[C]

Yeah. I'm gonna guess he's not a real agent.

[D]

Yeah, he said he was.

[C]

Yeah, of course he did.

[D]

He made me a deal.

[C]

He what?

[D]

He made me a deal.

[C]

He made you a deal.

[D]

I paid him $50.

[C]

50 bucks.

[D]

And he's only gonna take 15 of every job I get for five years.

[A]

Why were you.

[C]

What's he gonna get? Hey.

[D]

But he's Armadillo. And the Armadillos own show business.

[A]

It's true.

[C]

Do they? Yeah.

[D]

Look around.

[C]

I gotcha.

[A]

Look around.

[D]

Every.

[E]

Great.

[D]

You've been watching this. This Big Bang Theory.

[C]

Big Bang Theory? Yeah.

[D]

Okay. You know that guy?

[C]

Which guy?

[D]

I don't know his name. He looks like Dustin Hoffman on crack.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

You know that guy? Yeah, that guy.

[C]

The Sheldon guy? Yeah.

[D]

Sheldon. He's represented by Armadillo.

[C]

Isn't it Not.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

No.

[D]

He's not a half Armadillo himself.

[B]

No.

[C]

Who said.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

He's not. Did he?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No.

[D]

Star, Pete and Hut.

[A]

What are some of the other Armadillo's names?

[D]

Kirk the good Mr. Spock.

[C]

They're not Armadillo.

[D]

Some of their names. Yeah, well, everybody knows Harvey Weinstein.

[C]

Yeah, he's big. He's not Armadillo.

[D]

That's what you say. You never seen him out of makeup.

[C]

This guy in the barn is not telling you.

[D]

Hey, now, listen. I'm the sports prognosticator. Worth about half a million cashews.

[C]

You are?

[D]

Yeah. Really?

[C]

I done my research, okay?

[D]

You know, all right, you gotta go. You don't do it out here.

[C]

You might have got in a bar Como.

[D]

You gotta go downtown. Oh, go hang around the Longhorn Ballroom.

[C]

That's for the play.

[D]

On a Thursday night.

[C]

That's when all.

[D]

That's agent night.

[C]

That's when all the big talents hang.

[D]

Out across the street. They have amateur night.

[C]

Really?

[D]

For the girls.

[A]

Whoa.

[D]

Until you about midnight on Thursday. Oh, it gets weird. New Orleans ain't seen nothing like downtown Fort Worth on a Thursday night. Good God.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Really?

[D]

Yeah. I ate a whole corny dog. We had a ball. Anyway, he's gonna get me set up.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

On the new series coming out next.

[C]

Fall, you're gonna be a star.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

On what series?

[D]

The fourth Chasing the Far ch.

[C]

The fourth season of Fargo. Yeah. You're gonna have a part.

[D]

Well, it's a recurring part.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

I'm the. I'm the new sheriff that they kill. Episode four.

[C]

Episode four.

[D]

I don't want to ruin it for anybody.

[C]

Well, thank you for ruining it.

[D]

Really good screenplay.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

It's written by a monkey.

[A]

Randy, have you seen all the posts that the listeners have put about you on the. On our Jonathan Wolf show Facebook page?

[D]

On what, the telephone pole?

[A]

No, no, no. On the Facebook page.

[C]

Facebook.

[A]

Everybody's Randy. This is Randy that. They got a picture of a damn chipmunk smoking a bong. So there's Randy.

[C]

Y' all have computers. Surely you do.

[D]

I'm scared of the Internet. We got DVDs too.

[C]

Well, yeah. People throw those away.

[D]

Yeah. The keyboard's confusing to me.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I mean, I can't tell the difference between a T and a P and a.

[C]

Yes.

[D]

But I think I'm. It's really looking up. So, you know, I mean, I'll still be around for this deal.

[C]

But look, for stor time, lady, a lot of fans already.

[D]

I'm going Hollywood.

[C]

Oh, my God. He's going to be a really big guy.

[A]

I have a dilemma.

[C]

Okay. What is it?

[A]

And, Mike, do you have the audio of that motor? A motor, yeah. And I think this is the guy that called in last Saturday.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

After I started thinking about it. So we went to pick up a BMW. A 2012 BMW. Oh, my God.

[B]

I remember that.

[A]

And the driver. I don't know if it's the same one from last Saturday or not. We buy a lot of cars, but the driver got to the guy's house in Houston.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And said, something's up with this. And they called in our validation arbitration guy and sent them a video of of what it sounds like. This is a 2012 BMW 5 Series.

[C]

Okay?

[A]

Idling, idling. Just sound like a gas, not a diesel. Okay, listen, I didn't make that up. That's real. That sounds like a track loader problem. So. So.

[C]

This guy was gonna sell you this.

[A]

Here's the crazy part.

[C]

Now there's more.

[A]

So we pass on it, say it's got engine noise. And he says, no, it doesn't. It always sounds like this. It's always sounded like this. He said, well, something's wrong. So he jumps in the car and goes down to the BMW dealership and he said, within an hour, he sends us a report from the BMW dealership saying nothing's wrong.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

It's high pressure fuel injection on this four cylinder turbo.

[C]

And his brother owns the BMW.

[A]

I don't know, I. I'm shocked. I mean, we don't back up on our deals, right?

[C]

But as many cars you've seen, you'd know if the cars made this noise.

[A]

I've heard a Cummins diesel finally tuned not sound this good.

[C]

I was gonna say it sounds like.

[B]

An 89 power stroke.

[C]

It sounds like a luggage machine at the airport.

[A]

I don't get it. I'm. I'm. And I know the guy's upset, and I. I just. I want to get to the bottom. No, I can't believe a BMW dealership would certify this. And he said, it's under warranty. I said, great, take it to the dealership, get it fixed. Well, nothing's wrong. So the whole argument is nothing's wrong with it. Well, yes, it is.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And the BMW store says nothing's wrong with it. Well, yeah.

[C]

All these years, if the one there was a BMW made that noise, you would have heard about it.

[A]

I mean, the guys.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Whoever I sell it to, do you think that they're gonna be okay? I was just double checking myself. David, Good morning. You're on the air.

[E]

Hey, how are you?

[A]

I'm good. 70. I see. 76 Chevy Blazer K5. 108. 76. So se, that's the same body as a 77. New motor.

[E]

The Chalet. The Chalet model. The one they built the camper on.

[A]

You mean the one that has the fully removable top?

[E]

No, it doesn't. It doesn't remove. In 1976 and 77, they made the Blazer Chalet, which was advertised as the Blazer you could live in. They sent them off to Chinook Global up in Oregon, and they built this camper on them.

[A]

So it's like a Pontiac Aztec with the pop tent.

[E]

No, no, no. But it does have. The camper does pop up. Got stove and refrigerator and furnace.

[A]

So it's a Westfalia Blazer. Basically I'm looking at it.

[E]

Yeah, that's.

[A]

Basically I'm looking at a picture of it now. That's pretty cool. Is it? On a scale of 1 to 10, how nice is it?

[E]

I'd put it at 9.5.

[A]

Turley just pulled up a picture and that thing. I've never seen that truck in my life. What do you want for it?

[E]

I'm looking for 95, man.

[A]

I mean, you know, it sounds pretty special. Let me. It's got 2,000 on the new model motor. It's got 108 on the body. Hey, go to givemetheven.com and load that up and send me some pictures and let's take a hard look at it.

[E]

I'll do it.

[B]

Nor.

[A]

I mean like that truck. Normal, without the stories. Worth three grand. Maybe five.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

But with the story, you might have something I might buy.

[E]

Yeah, I think there's. There's 87 of them known to exist or still licensed.

[A]

I started driving a 77 Blazer when I was 8 years old. My grandfather. Father had one that he pulled behind his Bluebird bus.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

And I knew I liked you for a reason.

[A]

That was my car. I had keys to this car when I was a kid. And when I go visit my grandparents, I'd hop in and he had moving blankets and telephone books he'd stack up that I could sit. And we'd drive up to the LPMX. Yeah. And when I. When I turned 15. When I turned 15, I drove. That was my first car. And then I was gonna. I was gonna geek it out and lift it in this net. My dad stopped stop me and he just. My grandmother. My grandmother was awesome. She took care of me. She spoiled me. But she bought me a new, brand new 88K5.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Dude. And I love. I love those things. I love K5s anyway. Yeah, send it. Send it in, please, Dave.

[E]

I'll definitely do it. I thank you for your time.

[A]

Yes, sir. 800. 807-234.

[C]

Your heartstrings.

[A]

800.

[B]

Crazy ride, man.

[A]

That's crazy looking radio. Yeah. Never seen that in my life. I'm surprised. Turley's audio clip of the day. We don't have time for it, do we? No, not yet. We'll do it later. I want to talk about church camp.

[C]

Church camp? Why? What about it? Summertime. It's here. It's here.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

All kinds of summer camps, but church camp's cool.

[A]

Again, we don't have enough time. We've got 30 seconds left on this segment. So let me just give a shout out to listeners. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio is how you call in and get a live bid on your car right now, only people that really want to sell, please. I don't want tire. If you just want to kick tires and just, you know, just think, go to the website givemethevin.com it'll throw a number at you instantaneously. I like negotiating live deals on the air for the listeners because that's what's entertaining. All right. We'll be back. Una momento, por favor. We've got Tony Romo's dad. He's in the studio this morning and he'll be back in a minute.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf Show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com [e-mail] not only do they have an automated system that will bid your car instantly, but they will come to your house, office, wherever, and pick it up with a check. They're fast, they're over the phone, and they come to you like a pizza delivery boy. If they don't beat a written CarMax offer, they owe you 100 bucks. That's how much they believe in what they're doing. GiveMeTheVin.com is the best wholesale site to sell your car to, and it's not even close.

[B]

Sell us your car. Givemethevin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show. Call them toll free. 1, 800, 800 radio. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf show. And we're back in our number three and a half, going till noon in most cities. 11 and some others. Oh, David, the Ferrari guy, I want to get him back on. My name is John Clay Wolf. J.D. ryan, Bob O. Turley. David, you there?

[E]

Yes, sir. How are you, Mr. Wolf?

[A]

Good, good, good. Okay, all I see here is.08 Ferrari 430 Spider convertible, 7,000 miles. What color is it, man?

[E]

It's black.

[A]

Okay, what's the story, man?

[E]

You know, I'm the third owner on it. I inherited from my uncle. He bought it from a friend of his shortly before he passed. Man, it's, it's a real specimen of a vehicle here. Like I said, it's only got 7,000 miles. Got the shields, factory shields on it. You know, it's got the F1 transmission. I guess, really the only thing it really needs is tires at the moment.

[A]

Factory shields. FYI, everybody, the factory shields are the Ferrari logos on the fenders. Oh, and that's about eight thousand dollar option.

[C]

8.

[A]

Yeah, most of them come with it. But if you don't come with it, then it's a problem. It's a black car. Does it have all the services? Is the clutch up to snuff and all that good stuff?

[E]

Yes, sir. I just replaced the clutch. We did 10 G's on the clutch about a month ago.

[C]

10 G?

[A]

Yeah. I mean, that scheduled service is. Yeah, that's. That's what it. That's why these Ferraris, man, maintain their value so much, is because the owners have to pour money into them, I guess.

[E]

Okay, yeah, we're ready to stop doing that.

[A]

So you want to sell the car?

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

Okay. And why'd you call me? Because I'm glad you did. Because a lot of people don't think of me on these expensive cars. And I'm the best at these expenses.

[C]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Well, you know, I heard you were the go to guy, John, so, I mean, I figured I'd give you a shot. I have shopped it around. I'll be honest with you here. You know, I went to Carmax, they hit me at 70 on it, and then I decided to take 70.

[A]

Thousand.

[E]

Yeah, man. And I just couldn't take it. You know what else?

[A]

You went somewhere else. That's stupid. That's dumb.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. You know, that's why I walked out. Texas Direct hit me at 80. They were a little better, but I mean, I'm thinking 110 on this thing, John. I mean, I just really feel like that's what it's worth. I mean, what do you think?

[A]

It all depends on the condition. So the car needs a set of top tires. I mean, is it like a 9.5 car? Is the car flawless? Does it have any scuffs on the seats? Any scuffs on the paint? Any scuffs on the wheels? You've got the service records for the 10 GS you just spent on it. Where did you have that done? Did you have it done at a Ferrari store?

[E]

Yes, sir, I sure did. Right here in Dallas.

[A]

That's even better.

[C]

What does a set of tires cost?

[A]

Okay, so they're seeing it at 80. But see, those stores don't buy these cars high. A set of tires on this thing's too Bad, Awful. I'll definitely give 100.

[E]

You'll do 100 on it, John.

[B]

For sure.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Okay, okay, what buys, what buys the car? I want to buy the car. I don't want to talk about it. I mean, do you have the title? Hang on. Do you have the title in your name? And I mean, is it where you can sell it? So you inherited it? What about the estate papers and all that? I mean, did it transfer over?

[E]

We got the death certificate, we got everything we need. You know, like I said, we've already switched it over into my name, so.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

You know, I was thinking about keeping it, but. Yeah, I'm ready to let it go after that. 10 GS.

[A]

Right, right, right, right, right, Right, right. Okay, does 100 buy it?

[E]

Man, if you can do 105 and meet me in the middle, I'll take. I'll take it, John.

[A]

And you're in Dallas.

[E]

Yes, sir. You can come pick it up right now. I got title in hand.

[A]

I can get you $105,000 check today.

[E]

All right, let's use.

[A]

John, is it. I, I don't. They take a deep breath. No, no, I'm fine. I just don't want. I just need it to be a nice car. If it's a nice car, it's sold. So done deal. Okay, I'm going to put you on hold. I'm going to get you the bar. We're going to get lined up, we're gonna get it picked up today. Thank you.

[E]

Thanks, John.

[B]

Bam, bam.

[A]

800. 800. Well, I mean, it is what it is if you, I mean, this stupid.

[B]

Number plague those dollars.

[A]

Well, I mean, rather we buy Highline cars. Rolls.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Ben.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

We had that Lambo last week. Yeah, Boy, thing had a weird wrap on it, man. That was the weirdest rap.

[C]

What does that mean, wrap?

[A]

He wrapped it. He sent it to Hennessy and had a wrap put on it. And it. That's cool. The problem is when you're selling it, nobody believes what's underneath the wrap.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

They're like, oh my God, it's a keyed. It's this, it's that. So it, it's scary. And when you start jacking, I mean, Hennessy's a cool conversion company, but when you start jacking with a Lamborghini, what did they do? Did they do it right? Did they do it wrong? There's just so many questions that everybody gets spooked about.

[B]

Oh, I get that lock myself.

[A]

Oh, did the devil wrapped it?

[B]

Hi, everybody. Prince of Darkness here we Have Satan.

[A]

On the air with us.

[B]

Yeah. We get these kids out of church camp and I tell you, they think they've got them all wrapped up. Right.

[C]

Stop that about church.

[B]

I've never seen easier prey in my life.

[A]

Oh, stop it.

[C]

I'm telling you, honestly, this needs to stop.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What happens nowadays? They get to church camp and they get fed up by about day three.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, they're happy to come home and smoke dope.

[A]

Oh, stop it. Get it out of here. Watch cartoon 2010 fusion with 101. Okay. Cloth 10. Florida. Tom, you're in Florida. How'd you find us?

[E]

I listen to y' all on iheartradio.

[A]

Awesome. What city in Florida?

[E]

Tallahassee.

[A]

All righty. I can handle a deal down there, but I mean, it's four. It's four grand.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

Four grand.

[A]

Yeah. That's my.

[E]

This thing's got. This thing's got a standard six speed in it. Standard trans.

[A]

It's a stick fusion. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Tom, let, let, Let me. Let me bust the VIN and let me see the pictures. I'm not going to do anything until I see. I'm not doing anything. Okay, I hear you. I hear you.

[E]

Do four grand. Four grand on right now. I'll go load it up right now.

[A]

Hang on. Tom. Go load it in the website. Let me look at it and bust the bin. I'll be. And I'll. I'll get with you after the show. Man, he's eager.

[D]

That ought to be a half a pound of walnut trout that there.

[A]

Randy, we've got to go. Can you take us out, baby?

[D]

Come on back. John Clay Wolf's going to make us all rich.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com John Clay Wolf has been buying cars off dealers descriptions for 20 years and buying cars on the radio for 10. Why can you buy yours off a picture off his website? Give me the vin.com because he can. That car you didn't trade in that truck your dad gave you, the family truckster that Aunt Edna died in. If you don't check with gimmetheven.com first, you may need to get your head checked. They're the best buyers on cars. They pay top money. And if they don't beat a written carmax offer, they owe you a hundred bucks.

[B]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[A]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf Show. Hit him up right now. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf Show. I always thought you were cute.

[C]

You just cute. Nice.

[A]

I see Phoebe Cates coming out of the swimming pool now in her red bikini and Brad with his Captain Crunch hat on.

[B]

It's involuntary response.

[A]

It's just.

[B]

Hey, you know, they're showing that it's like the 35th anniversary or something on big screens on July 30th.

[C]

What?

[A]

Fast Times original.

[C]

Oh, really?

[A]

Hey, Brett Mansfield. Brett 01 Bullitt with 20, 000 miles. What do you want for this car?

[B]

Hi, Brett.

[A]

Brett, are you there?

[C]

Hello?

[E]

Brett. Yes, sir.

[A]

What do you want for this car? You there. Well, I. I would like.

[E]

I'd like to know what you're offering first.

[A]

Well, I just. A lot of. I mean, there's guys that are really serious about selling and. And they have a realistic figure, and there's guys that are Dream boat Annie. And if you're Dreamboat Annie, I don't want to even think about it. That's what. So what. What, What. What range are you talking.

[E]

Probably in the $15,000 range, maybe.

[A]

Okay. How long have you had it?

[E]

I'm original owner.

[A]

Okay, cool. Average MMR. Hang on. Where's the bullet? It's a.01 bullet. Is it green like the rest of them?

[E]

No, they. They made them in three colors. Mine is black. Mine, I think they made around 1800 in black that. That year.

[A]

Here's a 14,000 mile one that sold last March for 10. Here's a 30,000 mile one that sold for 5, which is probably rough. I mean, it would have brought more than that. 14, 10, 98,000 miles brought 6,400. So, you know, 10 grand is gonna be about the money on it.

[E]

All right, I appreciate it.

[A]

If that works, go to givemetheven.com and let's take a hard look and we'll email you an offer. Matt. 06 Grand Prix with 154. I'm gonna let Johnny Cash. I'm gonna. I think I'm gonna let Johnny Cash. Johnny and Joan bid that one. Have you ever heard it when Johnny bids one?

[E]

All right. It ain't me you're looking for, babe.

[A]

That's the worst, worst car in the world. An 06 Pontiac Grand Prix with 155. It's worth 300 bucks. I just hate them. It costs more to move it.

[C]

To move it. Yeah. What does it. What does it take to get about a commercial? Let's see. Somebody hit me on Facebook. And asked this. And I don't even have to ask you this on the radio. Be ready with the dump button. Do you have a commercial running? This is something about getting laid.

[A]

Like a Hawaiian.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

No.

[C]

Okay. Something somebody asked me on Facebook.

[A]

So what? No, no, no. Okay. We did a commercial. And it could be a double entendre if you have a dirty mind.

[C]

Okay. That's probably what happened.

[A]

You want to hear it? In the business, yeah, but in the business we use a term dealer to dealer. I've got, I've got your car I've got it laid down Laid down Laid down so. So you bring your. You bring your Mercedes s class, your $50,000 car to the Chevy house, right? They don't want to keep that car, so they call wholesalers and lay it down. I got it laid down I got it laid down I got it laid down and that's what I'm saying to the public is lay your car down with me.

[C]

Got it.

[A]

I haven't heard the commercial.

[C]

Totally misunderstood.

[A]

Don't get played on your trade get your trade laid down to me at Give me the VIN sell me your car at givemetheven.com I pay more than they do. And then you go into the dealership to buy your new one and you're just dealing with money and you don't get hosed on your trade in give me the vin.com. if I don't beat your CarMax offer, I'll send you a check for 100 bucks. So that's funny because I didn't think anything of it. But I've had a couple people ask me that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That's all they hear.

[C]

Somebody said, yeah, Rat.

[A]

Lay it down Lay it down Lay your trade down to me Put it to bed Lay it down Hashtag lay it down that's me. So what did you say, J.D. when?

[C]

I said I have no idea. I don't. I haven't heard John's commercials. I'm sorry. I'm busy doing something else. I will ask him on Saturday. And I've done my duty.

[A]

But you didn't think it was too far fetched, huh?

[C]

I didn't understand the concept. How could John get on the radio and say something about getting late?

[A]

Get your trade laid down to me Down Lay your, lay your, get your trade laid down don't get played on your trade get your trade laid down to me got it. Okay. Romy09 Escalade with 140 is a hybrid. Everything working right? Is. Are the batteries up?

[E]

As far as I know. Yes.

[A]

Check.

[E]

Engine lights on the back tailgate doesn't lift by itself.

[A]

I understand. They all, all do that. It's weird. I, I, I've got a new one that I bought for my wife in the back tailgate quit working. I've got to take it in because it's under warranty. And the old one, the back tailgate, the, the 11. Anyway. 09 laid. Hybrid laid. I said laid. It's Escalade. That's what I call Escalades. It's lades. Oh, man. 09 laid with 140 hybrid. What color?

[E]

It's that pearl white color difference. It has the nicer 22 from the non hybrid too.

[A]

I understand it's a nine grand rig.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, and I'll, I'll send somebody over there with a check. If you've got a title, do you have a payoff or is there a title?

[E]

No, it's a title.

[A]

Yeah. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. If that works, we'll buy it.

[E]

Cool. Appreciate it.

[A]

Thank you. 8008-0072-3480-0800. Oh, did he see who's in the green room right now?

[E]

Oh, here he comes.

[D]

W.

[C]

What's h. What's that mean?

[B]

Buenos dias, senor Wolf.

[C]

Are you tired?

[B]

I think I have a be. Jack log I. Flying around the country doing what? You know about Antonio's. I'm happy to announce that Antonio.

[C]

Tony Romo.

[A]

Tony Romo's father, everybody.

[B]

For new listeners, number nine, quarterback.

[C]

Yeah, we know him.

[B]

Dallas caballeros once again playing the game of golf.

[C]

Used to be quarterback. Yeah.

[B]

You know, this time he played at the lake Tahoe American centurial celebrity game of golf tournament day.

[C]

Tournament.

[B]

Tournament day. Big event for Tony because.

[C]

Why?

[B]

Well, he have always dreamed about living in the liquita. Just like the Corleone family.

[C]

Like the Corleone and The Godfather Part 2. I remember that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This is one of his favorite films of all time.

[D]

Really?

[C]

Godfather Part 2.

[B]

And the best part, his celebrity partner, okay. Is the big time cinema star.

[C]

Oh boy.

[B]

Senior Jack Nicholson. Jack Nicholson, who is not a bad game of golfer himself.

[A]

Really.

[B]

Well, he's, he does curse a lot.

[C]

Yeah, I was gonna say he's been known to use the golf club but mostly on other people's cars lot. He curses a lot.

[A]

He's very.

[B]

And many people don't know that. Jack Nicholson, he have a very unconventional approach to the game.

[C]

Really.

[B]

All this week he have been showing Antonio how to play all 18 holes. Okay. With Nothing but an axe.

[C]

No.

[B]

Yes, he does.

[A]

No, we don't.

[B]

Yes, he do. Every time he hit the ball, he yell out, here's Joni.

[C]

I got it.

[B]

And Tony, while he's a professional.

[C]

No, he's not.

[B]

He argued with Jack about bringing no clubs onto the course because he liked to play with his C sign. And Jack said to him, you wanted your C science.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

You can't handle the C science.

[C]

You can't handle the C science.

[B]

He seems to get excited very easily.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And every hole Jack dedicate to a different lovely actress.

[C]

Really?

[B]

You know, like this. On where's the Hole? First he says, I dedicate this whole heel to Jessica Lang. The nicest little piece of tail in all of Hollywood. Okay? And then he hit the ball.

[C]

He hit the ball.

[B]

And then on the second hole, he says, I dedicated this hole to Chair.

[C]

Chair.

[B]

And Susan Sarando.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

And Michelle Fifer.

[C]

Michelle Pfeiffer.

[B]

The best. A little foursome over my life. And then he hit the ball.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

And all week long, he have no run. He have no run out of famous starlet names to say before he hit the ball.

[C]

Dated a lot of people.

[B]

In fact, this has become a problem for Tony.

[C]

Why is that?

[B]

Because yesterday, as they were teeing off Jack and his clothes. And he said, I dedicate this hole to. To le. Jessica Simpson. Jessica Simpson, who gave me much of the freaky dicky back in the day.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And before he can finish saying this, Antonio grabbed his ass and he throw it 61 jars.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yes. All the way onto the second green.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Where he clipped poor Justin Timberlake in the chin bone. Luckily, he was no hurt. Apparently he was feeling chilly and wore his Lego warmers.

[C]

I didn't read this.

[B]

And a pretty little golf skirt by Botanica.

[C]

I didn't know that.

[B]

Which slightened the impact. But Senior Jack, he was livid. And like lightning, he grabbed Antonio around the neck with both hands and throttled him.

[A]

No.

[B]

Just like the nurse Ratchet on the movie about the nest of the cuckoo. Until Bill Murray happened to come and pull him off.

[D]

Bill Murray.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

What a. This is a hell of a scene.

[B]

It was a big scene.

[A]

Big deal.

[B]

And Senor Jack have been removed from the touramente.

[C]

Oh, bad. Yeah, they get upset about that.

[B]

But the good news for this weekend. And then you can watch on NBC Sports.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

That's NBC with the sports on the end.

[C]

NBC Sports.

[B]

They give Tony a new, more stable celebrity partner to play with.

[C]

Good.

[B]

The Gary Busey.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

Yes. They get along fine, though they haven't drank a lot of beer already this morning.

[C]

Gary Busey.

[A]

Busey.

[B]

I think he should be very well. Oh yeah, he plays with no axe. He uses his teeth. So be sure and watch number nine, Tony number nine on the TV this afternoon, okay? And please be careful with your children.

[A]

Thank you, Tony Roman's dad.

[C]

And what a wacky. So I hardly believe there's no cell phone video.

[A]

An AX flying 61 yard will in Austin, Texas. Good morning.

[B]

Dangerous.

[C]

Very dangerous.

[E]

Hey, good morning. So I got a 06 Duramax 2500 LBZ. It's a two wheel drive. It's as clean as could be. I bought it off a buddy of mine's grandfather who passed away who put about 10 on it a year.

[A]

Does it have a sunroof?

[E]

What's that?

[A]

Does it have a sunroof?

[E]

It does not have a sunroof. It's the lt.

[A]

Okay, so it's not an ltz, it's an lt.

[D]

It's.

[E]

Yeah, so it's an lt but the engine is the LBZ Duramax which is like pretty much the last year before all the emissions garbage was put in. So the engine's pretty desirable cuz it's easily modified. And it's just, I get about, honest to God, 22 on the highway and about almost 18 around town in it. I mean it's, it's, it's great, but okay, a little more than I can at the moment.

[A]

So it's a, it's long bed or short.

[E]

It's, it's the longer bed. It won't fit in my garage, unfortunately.

[A]

Oh, I've got to go. I've got 20 seconds. Hey, will 12 grand buy it now? What buys it?

[E]

I'm getting eight offers for 18.

[A]

18 buys it. Okay, go to givemetheven.com and let's look at it. Give me the VIN number. Give me some pictures. I mean I'm always on top of the money. I buy cars at auctions all the time. Outbid the other dealers. If that's the money on it, I'll buy it. I just need to see it. Give me the VIN number. We will be going into our number four podcast. Goes up in a few hours. Signing off on a few stations. Our number four on deck. Everybody stay on hold. Thank you.

[D]

No good for bad.

[C]

But I knew life before I left.

[D]

My left alone with big fat fetish.

[A]

The John Clay Wolf show. Call at 800800 radio. At 800800 radio.

[B]

Radio.

[A]

That's 8008007234 or online at givemethevin.com Lay down Sally. And they didn't accuse him of saying anything bad?

[B]

Nope, not at all now, but they will.

[A]

Sally laid her trade down to us.

[C]

A lot of songs that are questionable.

[B]

Let him say it three times and see if he doesn't get shoot eye.

[A]

I don't wanna. Yeah, do. Preston.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

Good morning. Almost. How are you, sir?

[E]

Love the show.

[A]

Thanks, thanks, thanks. What station do you catch us on?

[E]

94.5.

[A]

Ah, actually you can jump over to 97.5 in Houston and catch our number four, FYI.

[E]

Oh, okay.

[A]

Yep. A lot of people don't know that. They don't like me saying that on the air. But I mean, now that. Now that we're clear. 94, the buzz cut us off at 11. Anyway. 23,000 miles. XLT. XLT. FX4. So it's a. It's a cloth rig?

[E]

Yes, sir. Yes, sir. It's got a couple little creature comforts, you know, like automatic pedals, you know, all that good stuff. Turned off, all wheel drive, locking rear diff, all that.

[A]

Which wheel, the 18 or the 20?

[E]

The 18.

[A]

Damn it. Okay, I'm not knocking the truck. I'm just trying to, you know.

[E]

Oh, no, I understand.

[A]

If. If you had the same garage world with A cups or C cups. Yeah. And you liked her the same, which one would you go with?

[E]

Well, I mean, anything more than a mouthful to waste anyway, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

You know?

[A]

Alrighty then.

[C]

You open the door, walk through it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

All right. We got an XLT with 23, 000 miles. I'm glad we were. I'm glad we were off that other station before he's said that. Holy. It's Satan again. I need to look, if it was leather, I know exactly what to hit this thing at. It's not.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

And I don't. I. I have trouble. I'm gonna put. If I buy this truck from you, I'm sending it south, straight to Southside, trimming glass and putting a leather kit in it because that's. That's what I need to get them sold. They're just so damn expensive. People like. I'm not going to spend that much money with cloth. Yeah, you live down and where it's hot. You probably bought it cloth because you didn't want to get your ass burned every time you got in the seat in summertime.

[E]

Yeah, I mean, it was just, you know, when I bought it, it was one of the last ones they had, you know, out there. And it was a good looking truck and I got a good deal on it.

[A]

Salesman got three marks on that one.

[C]

He did.

[A]

It's a. It's a 30. 30. 30. Average MMR is 34. 3. Okay, so that's probably right at the money. Can you go to give me the vin.com and load it up and let me take another stab this afternoon as.

[E]

Soon as I get off of work.

[A]

No sweat. Thanks man. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Robert from Bowie, Texas. Good morning. Good morning. You know my co host is from Bowie, Texas. Did you know that?

[E]

Small world.

[A]

Do you know Bavo?

[E]

I do know Bobo.

[A]

Robert Martin.

[E]

Good radio station.

[B]

Robert Martin.

[A]

Robert Martin.

[C]

Robert listens to you.

[A]

Okay. An 06 Ram with 200 on it. Average rough or clean condition.

[E]

I said rough. Okay, average. It held dense on the hood and top.

[A]

I mean it may be a TH000, it may be 2. The 200 grand on the miles really change this thing in hell. But I mean that's just. It's. It's borderline Mexico ready, you know.

[E]

All right. It's in good condition in general. Just trying to get rid of it.

[A]

Yep. Thousand to two thousand dollars. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up and let's see it and see some pictures and we'll work on it and get email you an official offer letter. There you go.

[B]

See at the V, Robert.

[A]

See at the V. Robert. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Okay. Bobo.

[B]

Yo, what's going on?

[A]

What is the story about you living with a group of alternative lifestyle people? Oh, that's a true story.

[B]

Not swingers.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

A bunch of. Bunch of well meaning fellas.

[A]

Give me a year. Time frame.

[B]

97, 96.

[A]

97.

[B]

My first wife left me after 90 days.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I mean up disappeared, gypsy gone.

[A]

Why Smoke. Did you ever catch. Did you ever get to track her down to get divorce sign? She's around.

[B]

Yeah, we're done. She's been around the last couple years. We talk sometimes. She lives somewhere in Oklahoma.

[A]

Did you have any?

[C]

Why she managed.

[B]

No, she had three when we got married and I let my fabulous bachelor pad go and rented a big old three bedroom house over on McNeil in Faith Village in Wichita Falls. So she's gone 90 days. I'm sitting in this house. I stay for like 60 days or something. I'm thinking I'm paying too much. I don't need this.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I was sad, right? Bet. So I found an ad in Wichita Falls. Times Record news, 300amonth. Rent a room in a house. Guy already owns a house. I go over to look at the house, okay. And he said, well, I work, you cry back, I'm not going to be there. But Johnny and James, a couple of the guys that rent the room upstairs.

[A]

Sounds like a real bachelor pad.

[B]

They can show you. Yeah, they'll show you the house. So I went over in the daytime. They said, showed me the house. Johnny and James. I thought, well, Air Force guys, you know. So they showed me Jay's room and they, they had referred to Jay as a he a couple times. So when they showed me Jay's room, there's not much in there. There's like a bed frame. He's moved most of the stuff out. He's got pictures on the wall. All right, of Jason Priestley.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And who's the other 90210 guy? You know what I'm talking about?

[A]

Luke Perry.

[B]

Yeah. With their shirts off.

[C]

Good looking guys, no shirts.

[B]

Jay's got pictures of Niner two 10 guys with their shirts, shirts off. And I turned, I turned to James and Johnny and said, hey, hey. Jay's got pictures of guys on the wall. And they both said, hey. In harmony, right. Covered their mouth.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

So I thought, well, this is, that's.

[C]

A nice way to put it home.

[B]

Well, Todd, the owner of the house called me that evening and said, well, did you see the house? And this guy's, you know, just straight up as you and me.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Did you see the house? I said, yeah, I like it. Now, this place is immaculate. Two story in ground. Swimming pool in the back. My room, everything was clean, man.

[C]

House immaculate. Okay.

[B]

My room kind of. The entry's under the stairway.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Big bedroom. The windows on the pool in the back. Everybody there has a job, works.

[C]

Is there a rear entry?

[B]

He says, well, you, you know, we're all alternative.

[C]

Alternative?

[A]

He said that? Did he say alternative?

[B]

No, he didn't.

[A]

What did he say?

[B]

He said, well, you know, we're all homosexuals.

[A]

This is the guy that owns the house?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, so what are their names? I said, wait, wait, you got Johnny J. And who?

[B]

And Todd.

[C]

Good morning.

[A]

Johnny J. Todd and Bobo.

[B]

Yeah. And Todd's girlfriend, Eric.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

It took me a minute.

[B]

Who stayed in Todd's room?

[C]

Gotcha.

[A]

Never had Johnny J. Todd, Bobo and Eric.

[B]

Eric never had a problem one, you know. Now they were all gone by 6am in the morning. They were all either military or worked at the factory. Had to be there at 7am Okay. I go in at like 9:30, 9, 45 in the morning. So I get up, stick a speaker out my back window, go hop in the pool.

[C]

Perfect.

[B]

Make some coffee, breakfast, do the dishes. You had to clean up after yourself, man. I bet, I bet. Don't make work for any of the buddies, right?

[C]

Okay, what happens?

[A]

They get a little work.

[B]

Now coming home was different because they'd have drag parties or, you know, coming home was a totally different thing.

[C]

Something behind the car.

[B]

It was never as easy coming home as it was getting out in the morning, I'll tell you that.

[A]

Okay. How long did this go on?

[B]

Like six months.

[A]

Why did you leave? It sounds like a perfect establishment.

[B]

Well, it was just time, you know. I met my, my kid's mother. Actually I met her while I lived there. And she hung around quite a bit. Boy, they hated her. They hated. They were really nice to all my girlfriends until she came along.

[C]

What happened?

[B]

Okay, Todd and his girlfriend Eric.

[C]

Are we going somewhere with this?

[B]

We're having guests for dinner. It was a Saturday. Okay. We're having guests for dinner that night. They both went out shopping. I don't know for what, of course. New outfits for mom. And they had made, Eric had made six of these parfait style pudding cups in big old wine glass.

[A]

Guests.

[B]

Okay, you know, not the small one. Well, she ate four of them while they were gone. They came home, their puddings were gone. Right, right. Yeah. And the alternative lifestyle hit the fan.

[C]

I bet.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm gay.

[B]

That was the beginning of the end over this part.

[A]

Did they ask you to leave? Yeah.

[B]

Not really. No.

[A]

Did they ever?

[B]

I, I, they said they didn't want her around anymore. And I said, well, geez, that's my girlfriend, man. All she did was eat your pudding you liked. I mean, she didn't know. She didn't know how you know.

[C]

Yeah, how you know that would set people off.

[A]

They ever tried to convert you?

[B]

I watched my butt in there, man.

[A]

Did they ever try to convert you?

[B]

No, never had a problem. One. I was paying one of them 15 bucks a week to do my laundry.

[A]

Yes, yes, we will quit that story on the high note.

[C]

That's a true story though.

[B]

Cuz I'm always saying let's all get along, you know, don't hate anybody because of, you know, anything because everything like that. I had the courage of my convictions and I'd do it again. I had a ball.

[C]

Good deal.

[A]

It's all right.

[B]

Been better if they were gay women.

[C]

Yeah, but they weren't.

[B]

But they would certainly not have let me move in.

[A]

Brian, good morning, you're on the air.

[E]

Hey, good morning.

[A]

Good morning. Sorry we had to keep you on hold for Bobbo's little update there.

[B]

Well, you asked me anyway.

[E]

No worries.

[A]

Interesting. I'm interested. Okay. 12 4x4 Tacoma V6, is that correct?

[E]

That's correct.

[A]

And it's a TRD?

[E]

No, it's not a TRD. It's just the plain old plain all 4x4. But it does have to have. I've got some aftermarket lift and wheels.

[A]

Extended or four door.

[E]

Four door.

[A]

What color?

[E]

It's the. It's the green.

[A]

Okay. Does it actually.

[E]

It's actually a really good color.

[A]

Does it have the good alloy wheels or the cheap steel wheels? And I think it's the cheap steel wheels.

[E]

I've got the. I've got upgraded 20 inch XD's on here.

[A]

Okay. It's a 12 Tacoma 4 wheel drive V6 with 74,000 miles. And it's a nice truck, right?

[E]

Yeah, it's real Nice. Nice.

[A]

19 grand.

[E]

19 grand.

[A]

Okay. Does that buy it?

[E]

No, a little off.

[A]

What do you pay off or what? I mean, how am I missing you? Normally I get these bought.

[E]

Well, I've got. I used to work at Texas Direct. I've gone to a couple of places and just had it cashed out to find out what the buy price is. And I'm getting, I'm getting a higher quote than that. And I was actually looking for a little bit higher. They're all over the place. If you look at them on Manheim. If you look at them on auction, genius. They're just all over the place on the ones that are plain Jane. And this one actually looks stunningly good.

[A]

Is it on a dealer license or is it your individual truck?

[E]

It's my individual truck.

[A]

Well, if you, if you looked at Mannheim, and I'm looking at it too, so 73,000 miles brings 20,000. Here's one that brought 20, 21 and a half. Here's one that brought 19, 5. Here's one that brought 16. And here's one that brought 29. Nick, because I'm looking at the reports right now of the June transaction, I.

[E]

Haven'T, to be honest with you, to be honest with you, man, I haven't looked at it probably two weeks. When I looked at it two weeks ago, it was drastically all over the place. I saw one that had considerable more mileage that there wasn't anything remotely like what I've got. And it was much more expensive than I would ever think. I think that I could get for this.

[A]

What does it take to buy it?

[E]

Vice versa as well. This one's 25. I'm looking at 25,000.

[A]

Damn. He's not a car guy. No, no, no. I mean you. You. You had. I thought I was fixed to talk like real turkey, like. Like car man to car man until.

[B]

You said that, and then that 20 came out.

[A]

25. Wow. Yeah. How come you know that song was. Always. Went down five grand in two weeks.

[B]

That song was always the last song of the night back at the old house.

[C]

What one?

[B]

Yeah, this song right here.

[C]

Why?

[B]

Big parties at the old house and at the. This was always the last.

[A]

Eric. I can hear him, Jay. Oh, they played Tiny Dancer at the end of their party.

[C]

I said they did.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Send this out to Todd and Eric, Johnny and James. The boys upstairs.

[C]

Not yours.

[B]

And that poor Papa John's delivery guy, where they gave him our time, I bet so. Never gave me a hard time. They gave him a hard time, man.

[A]

He was a.

[B]

He was a pretty little.

[A]

What was that show you used to do, J.D. crying, loving or leaving.

[C]

Loving or leaving.

[A]

KSCS Radio Country. How would you do this song?

[C]

Oh, my. You wouldn't do this?

[A]

No. How would you do this one with. What are their names?

[B]

Todd and Eric, Johnny and James.

[A]

JD can you do your.

[C]

Send this one out to Todd and who?

[A]

Eric, Eric, Johnny and James.

[C]

Johnny and James.

[A]

But that's all you do is they send them this one.

[C]

Well, what you do actually, you get them to call in and they do it.

[A]

Okay. Baba will do it. Bobbo, call in. I Wanna. It's a. J.D. answer the phone. Ring, ring, ring.

[C]

KSCS. Hi, you're on.

[A]

We need to start the song over. Get ready to start the song over. Let's get quiet.

[B]

Let's.

[A]

Let's. Let's role play. Just like Bobbo used to do with Todd, Eric, Johnny and James. Okay. All right.

[C]

Crying, Loving or leaving. You're on.

[B]

Hi, this is Jason.

[C]

Hi, Jason.

[A]

Welcome.

[C]

Play for. For you tonight.

[B]

Can you play Tiny Dancer?

[C]

Tiny Dancer. Who's that going out to?

[B]

And send that out to my best friends forever.

[C]

Your very best, Todd and Eric.

[B]

Eric and Johnny and James. The boys upstairs. Your time to fix breakfast tomorrow, boys.

[C]

Ah, here it is. 96.3 KSC is crying.

[B]

It ain't funny. That's real life happening.

[C]

That's true. That's real life happening every night.

[A]

Devin from Austin. Devin, are you there? Good morning. I think we. I think Austin turns us off at 11, so we're not on the air down there anymore, right?

[E]

Correct.

[A]

So tell me this, Devin. We've been having problems with Austin. Can you believe that? What's going on on down there? Why are they so adverse to our comedy?

[E]

HE LAUGHS I don't know. It's pretty diverse down here.

[A]

Well, I mean, are you offended by like, like the last little bit we did? Does that offend you or we just fine?

[E]

No, not at all. Just fine with that.

[A]

Okay. Just fine with that. So we've got two people from Austin that said we, we're okay.

[C]

We're batting two for two.

[B]

But most of that audience is asking themselves ww l l d. Right? What would Loretta Lynn do?

[A]

2012 Ford Fusion, leather and nav. Is that right? Correct.

[E]

It's the SEL package.

[A]

Gotcha. What color?

[E]

Silver.

[A]

And it is a six cylinder or a four.

[E]

Four.

[A]

Really? On the SEL. I thought they only made them in sixes. Okay, so let me look at that. Fusion, all wheel drive, silver SCL with leather and roof and 59,000 miles. Okay. Do you have any other quotes? Have you been to Carmax?

[E]

I, I have been there and they really lowballed me.

[A]

Where'd they hit you at?

[E]

75?

[A]

Well, average MMR is 77. I just pulled it up as we're looking. I'll beat them, but I can't beat them bad. I, I mean, I'll get, I beat him by 200 and I'll come pick.

[C]

It up.

[A]

On a 12. Fusion, it's the four cylinder. That's. That, that's costing you about 1500 in your mind. The six cylinders bring about 1500 more. Okay, but yeah, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll raise their vid and go 200 over and pick it up and tell them what we talked about on the radio and we'll get her done.

[E]

All righty.

[A]

Thanks, Deb. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Kirk in Springtown. Yes. Man, these passats with miles on them like this are worth zero. They just are. The reason is they can't stay running. They just cannot stay running. They just wind up in the. If you have had no problems with this car and everything's been great, the moment that I give you the check and I get the keys and we like drive it to the place to get it washed. It blows up. Yeah, it's crazy. I just quit them. I just did. I just quit them. Unless it's a diesel. Is it a diesel?

[E]

No, it's not.

[A]

Yeah, I, I normally don't do this But I just don't want it.

[E]

Okay, well, yeah, I'll try to find an individual to buy.

[A]

Yeah. Would you take 500 for it?

[E]

No.

[A]

Okay, then. I mean, I can. If I gave you 500 for this, I'm gonna take it to my auction lane in Louisville and I think it's gonna bring 800 bucks. And then I've got transport and selfie and all that. I mean, that's really what it's gonna bring. All right, thanks. See you, man. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. We're going out with the Bill and Hillary.

[C]

Hillary song. Don't stop thinking about tomorrow because prison will be here before you know it. John Clay Wolf shows coming right back.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf show. And be sure to download the podcast@john claywolf.com.

[F]

[e-mail], not only do they have an automated system that will bid your car instantly, but they will come to your house, office, wherever, and pick it up with a check. They're fast, they're over the phone, and they come to you like a pizza delivery boy. If they don't beat a written carmax offer, they owe you a hundred bucks. That's how much they believe in what they're doing. GiveMeThe. Vin.com is the best wholesale site to sell your car to, and it's not even close.

[B]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com. it's so easy.

[A]

You can do it in your underwear, y'. All.

[E]

Show Gene what you can do for the boys from Oklahoma.

[A]

Okay? Now back to the John Clay Wolf show. Call them toll free. 1, 800, 800 radio. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf show. They roll their joints all wrong. That's how it goes.

[C]

Oh, man.

[A]

Hey, Frank. An oat. An old F150. Old body style. 160. Is it cloth or leather?

[E]

But it's A1 vehicle. I've had it since it had six miles on it.

[A]

Cool. What color is it?

[E]

Red.

[A]

Average. Rough or clean?

[E]

It's clean.

[A]

It's a four wheel drive. Crew cab. Does it have sports?

[E]

It's a great. It's. It's not crew cab, it's extended cab.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

It just has the four. It doesn't have a doors. It has the doors that open on the back. You know what I'm talking about?

[A]

Sure, sure, sure, sure. I guess 2500. Okay.

[E]

Well, I was offered six at the.

[A]

Dealership, so you should have taken it 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio.

[C]

Right to the point.

[A]

Yeah, I mean when we get into junk stuff. Six on 160.

[C]

The chase.

[A]

I mean, people over allow on cars, but they don't ever do it that much.

[D]

No.

[A]

Nope. I'm missing something. Triple overlap. Marty, here's a. Here's a nicer rig that we can. We can we like hitting hard. A 14 LTZ. Half ton Silverado with leather. Marty, where you coming from?

[E]

Houston.

[A]

Houston. What color is this truck?

[E]

It's white.

[A]

Okay. Four wheel drive or two?

[E]

Two wheel drive.

[A]

All righty. And it's a LTZ with no roof, is that correct?

[E]

Right, right.

[A]

I'm going to bid it as an LT Miles or does it have navigation?

[E]

No, no navigation yet. It's got about 28,500 miles.

[A]

You sure it's an LT with the Z at the end? Because normally they don't build it that way. I thought in 14. Okay.

[E]

Yeah. No. LTZ. LTZ, it's got the bow system, leather interior.

[A]

What color leather?

[E]

Black. Black leather.

[A]

Is there a number we're chasing? Have you had it bid anywhere else?

[E]

No, no, sir.

[A]

I just want to trade it in somewhere.

[E]

No, no. Actually want to sell it. I got about three trucks, so this one doesn't really get used that often.

[A]

So I guess 275.

[E]

27Five.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

All right.

[A]

Where.

[E]

Where would I take it to?

[A]

Just go to give me the vin. Vin. So get the VIN number, go to give me the vin, load the vin, load the miles. And when you do it, you're gonna click ltz. But make sure you put no roof because it's gonna deducted about twelve hundred dollars which it needs to. And it'll spit out a number right there at you. And then my buyer will email you and y' all do the deal.

[E]

Okay, sir.

[A]

Thanks, man.

[B]

And the thrilling dynamic response of a Bose acoustic Paul Hart audio system.

[A]

So, JD how long has it been since you were doing crime? Nine, 11.

[C]

Oh, my Lord. That was the late 90s. 20 years ago. Holy mackerel. 97, 98. Yeah.

[A]

So you were sitting up there at night on the popular country station radio station Dallas.

[C]

Oh, I got so much. You were taking attention.

[A]

So women were calling in. It was all women.

[C]

All women.

[A]

And they're giving you these.

[B]

These.

[C]

Show was crying, loving or leaving. So everybody was crying. They're loving or they're leaving. And every country song is about crying or loving or leaving and. Or drinking. But oh wow, what a crazy time. And it was so bad. The Program director at the time got, he got mad at me, got real sensitive about the fact that I, I was single, first of all, and had.

[A]

Were you just getting, were you just slaying tail crazy?

[C]

It was not, it was silly. It was silly. I, I, I, I think back, there's moments I walked away and turned down more than it was stupid. There was growing up like fishing, like.

[A]

Fishing with a net.

[C]

Yeah, it was like just dipping in and going, yeah, okay, you tonight. I mean, it was, it was like a rock star a little bit. So it was nothing.

[A]

Why people become radio DJs.

[C]

Yeah, I had a moment of that. Not my whole career, but I just had a window of that.

[A]

How long did that window last?

[C]

Two years. Two years. And it was just great. But the program director, a girl come up one night, she was bringing me a cassette tape that she wanted.

[A]

Real World butt stories by J.D. ryan.

[C]

This was just a real innocent. But the program director was so sensitive to it. He, he pulled the security camera and video footage and brought me in the next day. Went, who is this? Who's this walking in?

[A]

Was she good looking? Dean.

[C]

She was very hot. I said, dean, she's a bride. And she was bringing me up a tape so I could make her tape for her wedding tape. So I was doing something nice for Alyssa.

[A]

Is that true?

[C]

Absolutely. True story. But he was so convinced that I was bringing everything in the house to have business with, have, you know, relations with. I went, dude, did you ever bring in the studio? Pulled the videotape from the security cameras and pulled me into a meeting.

[A]

I'm like, who is this?

[C]

I've had that, dude.

[A]

What a nut. Did you ever. Have you ever made sweet love in the, in the studio?

[C]

Of course, silly.

[A]

Would they ever call into you and like, come up and, yeah, but you real care.

[C]

You had to be real careful with that. Because the ones that sound like they call the radio and go, hi, John. Never fails. Those are the worst ones, the ones that are a little questionable. That's what, why you meet them somewhere and you don't tell them what you're driving. You lie about your car.

[A]

This is before they could just shoot you a picture.

[C]

Right, Right, right. And so, yeah, we didn't have cell phones and pictures.

[B]

Why are you screwing around with all that?

[C]

You lie about the car. So you show up and they don't know your car. And then they say, well, you said you were in a Corvette. You're in a truck. Oh, yeah, I left the Corvette back at the station. That way they didn't you could drive by and if they were ugly, you just keep driving.

[A]

So cheesy.

[D]

It was awful.

[C]

Dude, don't bother with all that.

[B]

Just tell them to come on. Up, up.

[C]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[B]

Unlock the door for you.

[A]

Have you seen pictures of this guy? Back in that day, he looked like Tom Cruz.

[C]

Not ugly.

[A]

His standards are higher than yours. Do you not understand this?

[B]

Well, perhaps.

[A]

Perhaps he was blue ribbon. You were down at the butcher shop eating on the hog straight out of the pen.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

He was picking them out of the state fair.

[C]

Well, you don't want the ugly ones.

[B]

Perhaps that's indicative of my taste.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Well, your taste was created for a reason. That way, when you're as good looking and I'm not attracted to you. J.D. don't get.

[C]

It was a long time ago, but you were.

[B]

You were.

[A]

I've seen pictures. You look like a. You're a very handsome man.

[B]

Hey, man.

[A]

Very popular. Radio star, TV star. Yeah, I mean, I believe it. That's why I asked these questions, because none of us can relate.

[C]

It was very.

[B]

I don't want to gauge this from a small place, but like, I was pretty good looking myself.

[A]

Here we go. Here we go.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Good morning. I'm gay.

[A]

Good morning.

[C]

I'm gay.

[A]

All right, so you're. So this is a battle of the small town attractive DJ.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

This is the big town attractive DJ from 20 years ago who had more play that's in their career.

[B]

If I play that Juice Newton for you, you going to bring me some Cheetos? Come on, sing.

[C]

You got more play than I did. No doubt.

[B]

Cheetos and Juice news be the Pied Piper.

[C]

Jd, the back door was always open.

[B]

Always.

[C]

Not at our studios unless it was occupied. But anyway, so I got in trouble that I get some reputation I certainly didn't deserve.

[A]

Oh, this is too much. Sam. Good morning. I need to talk to someone that's normal for a minute. All these. All these celebrities around me are making me uncomfortable.

[C]

Celebrities?

[A]

Are you there, Sam?

[E]

I am.

[A]

I. I think JD's stories are true. I really. We need. Turley, we need to put up a picture of JD in his. Like the. The. The shot. His slick shot that he used to sign on the Facebook page so people can see how. Go ahead.

[E]

I've seen an old picture of JD and I'll tell you, I bet you back in the day he was busier and jumper tables at a Mexican funeral.

[A]

Sam, you get the line of the day right there.

[C]

Hard to put that way.

[A]

Sam. I like that. Busier the jumper cables at a Mexican funeral. I'm glad we didn't say that in Austin. Are we in trouble for that?

[C]

Oh, my lord.

[A]

Ah. What is it?

[C]

Picketing the station.

[A]

What is up with Austin?

[C]

They are very tight.

[A]

When we first got on the air in Houston, it was the same thing.

[E]

I'll tell you what's up with Austin, but. I can tell you what's up with Austin, but they'll kick you off all the other radio.

[A]

Right, I understand. I understand. A 10 edge. A 10 Ford edge with 96 cloth. Is it the. Which version is it SE?

[E]

Yes, sir. It's messy.

[A]

Just off the top of my head, it's seven grand. Okay.

[E]

All right.

[A]

If that sounds right to you, go to givemethevin.com and we will email you an exact offer. I'm. I could get one now, but I'm just too lazy. I just don't want to do it. I know it's. I know I'm close. It's like 68, 71 60s right there. So actually, if you go to givemetheven.com my computer will throw the number at you right then it'll do it automatically.

[E]

All right.

[A]

All right, man. Thanks.

[E]

Perfect, man.

[B]

Love the show.

[E]

Have a great one.

[A]

Appreciate it.

[C]

It's ironic about Austin is they like to think of themselves as so open and so love child, and they're most just so tight.

[A]

It's so funny during the week when people come up to me and I heard the show Saturday and they pull up. So they pull one line out of it that we didn't even think about that they thought was the funniest thing they've ever heard. It was last week. It was Jerry at the auction. He came and he loved the Austin liberal football team where the quarterback always rolls to the left. Just thought that was the funniest thing in the world. Okay, 800, 800. Seven two, three.

[C]

Walk up a year later and throw that at you.

[A]

You remember what you said about Austin? We have Buster Dicks in the studio with us.

[C]

Love him.

[A]

He has.

[C]

Speaking of Austin, he knows all the folks.

[A]

He has something to say about this Clinton. Was there another murder in the Clinton world?

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Buster, you there?

[C]

What was that story? Yeah.

[B]

Hey, y' all.

[A]

First.

[B]

I love y'. All. Caveat. Twang it on down with you. See you next week, I guess. I don't know.

[C]

Yeah, you're.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

Well, you're on vacation.

[B]

Hell cares, you know, I'm going to do what I do. I'm Going to. I'm going to play the Buster Dicks role. I got you.

[C]

Okay. All right.

[B]

How about this guy, the GOP guy?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What happened? I don't mean gop.

[C]

No, I know.

[B]

Grand Old party collecting Hillary Clinton secrets and all.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

This guy got bumped off, middle of the week. Says a suicide.

[C]

He said, they said it was a suicide.

[B]

He left a suicide? No. Which would indicate a suicide.

[C]

Right.

[B]

In the course of the suicide note, right, he writes. That's the questionable line, which is no foul play.

[C]

What the hell is that shaky handwriting? He wrote no foul play.

[B]

That's kind of like an indication foul play right there. I mean, somebody puts a gun to your head and says, right, no foul play. That's what you do.

[A]

Did he, did he. Did he shoot himself right there where Vince Foster did also?

[B]

I don't know about that. He wasn't a good looking fellow.

[C]

What is that different?

[B]

Well, you know, I mean, you get a looking, you don't off yourself.

[C]

That's not true.

[A]

He's still here.

[B]

Like, I mean, I'm. I'm never going off myself.

[C]

Stop it.

[B]

God sakes.

[C]

Oh, my Lord. So it's just another questionable body in the past.

[A]

But what was. What's questionable about this fellow?

[B]

Well, he was digging up secrets on.

[C]

Hillary Clinton, suddenly committed suicide again, left a note that said, definitely no foul play here. Nothing to see.

[A]

How do they know he was digging up secrets?

[B]

You ever see The Damien Omen 3? Yeah, that's a little bit like that. You know, Anaka comes. Nobody said it ain't gonna be a girl. You know what I mean?

[C]

Nope.

[A]

So what was it? I mean, was he writing a book? Was he snooping around? Does anybody know the details?

[B]

I think he was trying to get Donald Trump elected. Okay? Now, Donald Trump won the election and months behind and gone. And no matter, you know, how well or not he's done so far.

[C]

Far.

[B]

Right, right. You don't kill somebody, you know, while you. While you're losing, you kill them, you know, six months after you've done laws.

[A]

Well, hang on. Rush is sitting right there. He's got his hand up. Rush. What? What? What? What? What do you think about this?

[B]

Are you asking me?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

What do you think about this? Suspicious death. Another one.

[B]

Why do you think we call her Killary?

[C]

I know that's why you call her car.

[B]

That's probably just a rumor. You know, they said the same thing about Popeye the sailor man back in the old, old days. No, I don't know if you watched those cartoons.

[C]

I did of course I did.

[B]

Popeye was not always the star of the show.

[C]

Yeah, he kind of was now.

[B]

He was a geek for hire. You know that they would hire him to. To take him to the island of the Goons. Well, you remember Alice the Goose?

[C]

Of course I remember Alice again.

[B]

Well, the old flasher studios. Popeye films weren't called Popeye Films back then. It was Goonsville.

[C]

No, that's true.

[B]

It's absolutely true. Yeah. And you had Wimpy and Geezer.

[C]

Yeah, I remember Wimpy.

[B]

And the Oil family. Olive oil, Herald Oil.

[C]

Right. I don't remember that one.

[B]

Motor oil. No, that.

[C]

That didn't exist. Wesson, totally making it up.

[B]

Kid brother Wesson making it up. They used to put Wesson on the floor in the living room. Just big parties.

[C]

Making it up.

[A]

Slide around with your socks on. Yeah.

[B]

You know, Popeye was a bit of an anti hero.

[C]

No?

[B]

How's that? He had a speedboat that could do the Kessel run in 12 parsecs. That's what he said.

[C]

No, I don't think.

[B]

And his first mate, Chewbacca would say like. Like that.

[A]

You were totally skipping tracks.

[B]

Look, what passage to Alderaan at that time? What day is it?

[C]

Today is Saturday.

[B]

Okay. Alderaan passage. Alderaan would cost 15,000 credits.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

No questions asked.

[C]

No, of course.

[B]

And these are not the droids you're looking for down there.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

When Popeye says. Says it, it's more like that. That's a crazy thing. And so all I'm saying is that probably there was no foul play. Okay.

[C]

Makes sense.

[A]

Will you take us out, Russia?

[B]

Unless it was fondue style.

[C]

I understand.

[B]

We'll be back with more of the John Clay Wolf show. If we can afford it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Right after this, We'll be back with more. More of the John Claywolf Show. And be sure to download the podcast@john.

[F]

Claywolf.Com givemethevin.com is so easy. Check out the new automated bidding [e-mail] John's money. John's bid is right there. And we'll throw it to you right now. It's all automated. It's real time. You wait on nothing. If you're headed to the dealership, get a number from givemetheven.com first. If you don't check with givemetheven.com first, you may need to get your head checked. He's John Clay Wolfe, and he's the largest wholesaler in the Southwest.

[A]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf Show. Hit him up right now. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay wolf show. Me how this town guitars Cadillacs and hillbilly music segment number 20. End of show. 10 minutes left. What do we do? What do you want to do?

[C]

What do you want to do?

[A]

Brian Lafayette 78 vet with 110 average, rougher, clean. You there, Brian? Corvette. Brian. Just put it and give me the Vindo JW07 short bed. 170,000 miles. These damn miles. It's cloth. Is it a two wheel drive or four?

[E]

Two wheel drive.

[A]

Average, rough or clean?

[E]

Very clean.

[A]

I can hear it in your voice right now. You're not going to like my offer. Very clean. You son of a. I hear you, but it's the miles. The miles, the miles, the miles.

[E]

It's still under the. The engine's still under warranty. It was a factory crate motor.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[E]

It's still. It's still got two and a half years on the unlimited mileage and parts warranty.

[A]

That's nice. Is it a crew cab? Yes.

[E]

It's a four door.

[A]

Yeah. You're not gonna like my offer. What do you think I'm gonna hit it at?

[E]

I have no idea. I know what I on it.

[A]

What do you owe on it?

[E]

13 1.

[A]

It's a 07.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

You need to keep driving it, man. Or let them repo it. Three grand, maybe four.

[B]

That hurts, doesn't it?

[A]

Oklahoma with 250,000 miles. No way. Get out of here. I don't believe it. Justin, you there?

[B]

Get out of here, kid.

[A]

You bother me. I think that you guys buy like they miles the trucks up in Texas and then y'.

[D]

All.

[A]

Then the dealers down here buy them with 200 and they send them to Oklahoma. I see it on my auction recap all the time. It's Arkansas. In Oklahoma, dealers that buy these miley, miley, miley trucks. Crazy. And I. You're not going to like my offer either. You're going to yell at me. Everybody's going to yell at me. I'm grabbing all these cars where everybody's mad. I like the cars where I can be strong buyer and people are impressed.

[C]

Everybody's happy in these deals.

[E]

I'm not. I'm not going to yell at you.

[A]

Okay. It's a. It's claw. It's a 04F. 250 diesel, four wheel drive, extended cab with 237,000 miles in cloth. Is it average, rough or clean?

[E]

Average.

[A]

You're going to yell at me? I mean, get ready. Call you're going to call me a name. You're. You're going to. You're going to talk to me worse than my wife does, and that's pretty bad.

[E]

I promise you I won't.

[A]

I don't even want to come get it. 4. 4 grand and you come get it. I mean, you bring it to us.

[E]

If I see. I'm. I'm. I'm happy with that because I'm actually thinking of buying it from a family member for four grand. So I'm not getting screwed.

[A]

So he's not yelling at me. He's using you. They're going to yell at you.

[E]

Yell at me. My wife does. All the time.

[A]

I hear you. I'm the same way. What's up with that anyway? Why do women yell at their husband?

[C]

Because they're angry at their life.

[A]

Life. Why. Why did you.

[E]

Because she's stuck in a hospital at the moment, ready to go home.

[A]

Okay, well, that. That makes sense. But everything's so happy and cheery, and then they just get mad, mean at you. I don't understand.

[E]

That's about right.

[A]

All right, well, good luck with it.

[C]

Don't you ever just get angry all of a sudden?

[A]

Yeah, I don't start yelling at.

[C]

Everybody's different, though. You married her. You knew this was the case when you married her.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

No, she. Yeah, we love her.

[A]

No, she's. She is just. It's that European. It's that European hot head.

[C]

Where's she from?

[A]

It's like a good old Mexican girl, man. I mean, they're fun and they'll cook, but, man, they'll get mad. Where's she from?

[C]

Norway.

[A]

Yes, Copenhagen.

[C]

Copenhagen.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I heard they're the one of the first societies to go cashless.

[A]

I'm sure everything over there is better than.

[C]

He's always first.

[A]

The strawberries over here. Oh, they're so much better in Denmark.

[C]

The water.

[A]

Oh, the water's so much better in Denmark. The air.

[B]

How do you go cash?

[A]

The air is so much better in Denmark. I'm like, it's not Denmark. It's the fact that it's on the freaking ocean.

[C]

Everything.

[A]

I take you to Galveston, it'll be ocean air also. What?

[C]

Everything is magnetic. Everything's card. Everything is even, you know, wireless from your phone or your card, you carry no cash. It's.

[A]

They're high tech people.

[C]

People. It's not available. You just. They don't take it anyway.

[B]

So there's no monetary, there's no fiat currency anywhere.

[C]

You can't tip somebody that way. Nothing.

[B]

Well, that's crazy.

[C]

That's what they're trying to.

[B]

Pardon me, but what about hookers?

[C]

Only you would consider that.

[B]

Is it okay? Can I say that?

[C]

Yeah, I think probably. Yeah, you say that. I think probably you would put that on a card you'd have to put on. It would have to show up as entertainment.

[B]

I think I've offended the Wookiee.

[C]

I think you have too.

[A]

Hey, is it just me? This is a really weird question, but every once in a while, like, I'll feel the back of my ears, you know, it's kind of sore. Right, right.

[B]

I mean.

[A]

And I'm just thinking, well, maybe I haven't been like, showering. Well, like rubbing the back of my ears.

[B]

You use a loofah?

[A]

No. Do you ever get a little, little redness behind your, like your earlobe in where it connects?

[C]

Right where it connects.

[A]

Yeah, you get a little bit.

[C]

I don't know what that is, but I get that.

[B]

Yeah. You gotta scrub it, man.

[A]

So you said, is it. I just need to wash it. It better.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I guess something.

[B]

Do something.

[A]

I mean, it's not like red and.

[C]

Flame tips on the John Cleveland Show.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That makes you sound like Mario.

[B]

Put the leeches on it.

[A]

What have you got there? J.D.

[C]

We have one more for you here. This is a headline I'm going to read. Is this a true story or is it Facebook folly? This is floating around this week. Insanely huge. You know, a super Soaker is right. The big water guns. Insanely huge super soaker. Shatters watermelons and glass. A seven foot long super soaker. It will shatter watermelon and glass. It'll shatter glass. The seven foot long Super Soaker. Seven, by the way. With water at 243 miles an hour, 2400 psi. It's a Super Soaker.

[A]

It'll come.

[C]

Is this real or not?

[A]

Oh, that's real. But I mean, is it not hooked up to some kind of power source?

[C]

Apparently not.

[A]

I don't believe it. If it's not. I mean, it's got to run off CO2 or something.

[C]

Look and see if it says what it runs off of.

[A]

So it's real.

[C]

A former NASA engineer has unveiled a modern monster sized water gun. He's calling the world's largest super soaker. Capable of smashing can glass, Coke cans, watermelon, and probably cut your arm off.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Have you ever shot a potato? Potato gun.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Isn't that fun?

[C]

Oh, God, that's fun.

[A]

Out of pvc.

[C]

Okay. It does utilize nitrogen. Nitrogen gas and Water, by the way, this super.

[A]

So there you go.

[C]

NASA engineer comes up with a super soaker.

[A]

Have you ever.

[C]

No, I've heard about it. I've seen the video.

[A]

Have you seen the YouTube video where the guy shot the. What? The refrigerator.

[C]

And it's coming out, door comes right out, misses him. Only because he's behind a tree. Otherwise the guy would have been dead.

[A]

You might be a redneck, Bob, if you.

[C]

You ever shot Tanner getting killed by a refrigerator.

[A]

Yeah, I need to do that. Is it something everybody needs to do at least once?

[B]

Absolutely. Yeah. It's like going to California. You just got to do it.

[C]

I'd be afraid at that one video, he was 100 yards from that refrigerator and that door came right at him. Like.

[A]

How much does it take to get that kind of explosion, Bob? Like a. Put in candy bars?

[B]

Like a Snickers and a half, probably.

[A]

Really? That kind of an explosion? Charlie, have you done.

[C]

How do you. Let me ask you the. How do you get a hold of something that's. That expl.

[A]

Let's go out to the ranch and shoot something. Well, you don't.

[C]

Or you can't get a hold of C4? I mean, you can, but they're going to come. Hello?

[B]

Yeah, they keep.

[A]

Where do you get it, Bob? Store.

[B]

You got to know somebody in construction.

[C]

Store.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know or who works for the highway department and isn't afraid to steal from the highway.

[C]

I was going to say you're stealing.

[B]

It ain't legal. It ain't legal.

[A]

Is not. Oh, it's not?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Can't be that explosive. No.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It can't possibly be.

[A]

All my friends. Where are they getting it?

[C]

They don't even let you have class C fireworks.

[B]

Yeah, you can't even have an M80 anymore.

[A]

The phones are fixed to light up. Don't bother calling because we have 11 seconds left. So call us next week and tell us about. Email you your tannerite stories or. Yeah, go to the show page, John Clay Wolf show on Facebook. And I also going to put up some pretty JD Posters.

[B]

Oh, Jesus.

[A]

Bye.