The John Clay Wolfe Show — Episode #130 (01/06/18)

Date of Broadcast: February 13, 2026
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Cast: J.D. Ryan, Bob Floyd, Michael Turley, Bobo, various callers, and regular show characters
Podcast Theme: “Cars, sports, sex, drugs and rock & roll — just about anything as long as it won't get us fined by the FCC.”

🏁 Episode Overview

Main Theme:
A high-energy, freewheeling Saturday morning show combining car talk, wild stories, irreverent humor, sports commentary, and regional banter. The Gimmethevin.com team takes live calls to buy/sell vehicles, harps on rock radio and TV culture, touches on drugs (especially marijuana and the legalization patchwork), recalls local history and sports, and lets their cast of regulars riff on everything from auctions to family.

🚦 Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. Kicking Off the New Year / Announcements

• Houston Listener Party: A huge upcoming event for the show’s 1,000th episode in Houston on February 10th, near the Galleria (03:00).
  • “The thousandth show party in Houston near the Galleria. All I know is there’s gonna be free beer and women… and T-shirts.” – John Clay Wolfe (03:00)
• Jobs with GiveMeTheVin: Company is hiring—drivers, buyers, accounting clerks—no commercial license required, just decent driving and basic literacy (25:38).

2. Car Calls — Live Bidding and Trading

• Callers all morning pitch cars to John: model details, mileage, condition, then haggling on price.
• Emphasis on beating CarMax offers and the “$100 or I’ll kiss your ass” guarantee.
  • “If we don’t beat your CarMax offer, I’ll either give you $100 or I’ll kiss your ass.” – John (09:39)
• Notable car deals discussed:
  • 2007 Porsche Cayman (06:48)
  • 2012 Ford F250 (08:28)
  • 2010 Ford Platinum (41:20)
  • 2008 BMW M3 (51:44)
  • 2012 Range Rover Sport (84:46)
• Insights:
  • High-maintenance foreign cars often not worth paying off the loan.
  • Used diesel trucks, especially Dodge Cummins, retain remarkable value (147:19).
  • Convertibles (even sought-after ones like Porsche 911s, Corvettes) usually sell for less than hardtops due to “girly” market and transmission choices (148:33).

3. The Dope Report with Bob Floyd

• Satirical, insightful breakdown of marijuana’s evolving legality, Sessions’ federal crackdown, impact on business owners and underground opportunities.
  • “These new millionaires—be they in California, Colorado, or Massachusetts—are about as likely to trash their stock and give up their fortunes as Jeff Sessions is likely to do or say anything remotely cool anytime soon.” – Bob Floyd (04:00)
• Tips on buying from dispensaries in potential “fire sales,” and the ever-present divide: “separates the dealers from the dopers.” (04:00–06:40)
• Supported by later riffing: marijuana changing business, high as a cultural motif, marijuana seen as both a peacekeeper and a business opportunity.

4. Local Sports, TV, and Media Satire

• Roasting Dallas local New Year's Eve TV coverage, especially the choice of folk band Jackopierce as headliners (“Jack O Crap” nickname):
  • “...they brought this dead horse and set it up on stage and put pearls on its head…” – John (20:18)
• Jokes about news anchors, hokey local media bumpers, bad band bookings.
• Pro sports wall of shame (“Wall of Shame”): OJ Simpson, Johnny Manziel, Aaron Hernandez, Ray Rice. Bids for others to be added and tongue-in-cheek criteria for shame vs. murderers (18:21).

5. Rock & Roll, Drugs, and Listener Games

• Frequent music references: Pink Floyd, Alabama, local nostalgia, playful rock trivia.
  • Jackopierce/“Waffle House” musical parody.
• Alcohol & Drugs: Freewheeling stories about New Year’s, cocaine-fueled Yahtzee games, experimenting with managing beer intake, and a long debate on how certain liquors affect your mood (124:49).
• Comedy Segment: "White, Black, Latino, or Other": Guessing the ethnicity of a criminal based on the news story. Example: man breaks into police station to “steal” his own bike (30:45–34:17).

6. Show Characters and Improv

• Rush Limbaugh and Satan impressions pop up to comment on weed, politics, and cultural topics (34:42, 95:18).
• Randy the Chipmunk: Surreal stories about iguanas in Florida dropping from trees due to cold (“acid-freak iguanas”), interspersed with chipmunk and animal drug humor (77:21).
• Cluck Norris: Expository on the origin story, fending off the “neighborhood rooster” (114:52).
• Aunt Fetterman: Parody “relative” who persistently asks for money and drifts into family stories (66:32–72:31).

7. Pop Culture & Odd News

• Discussion of Paris Hilton's engagement, scathing humor about celebrity culture and reality (105:15).
• Oddball stories: time traveler claims from the future, aliens, plane passengers escaping onto the wing, airline law (117:15).

8. Car Industry Deep-Dive & Market Insights

• Arbitrating auctions: The elaborate, sometimes scammy, process of “arbitration” at auto auctions—delaying, faking complaints, extorting sellers for credits or discounts (128:55–133:03).
• Car market advice: body style over year, used diesels for best value, why certain luxury cars tank in value, and why so many Nissan Altimas gather dust in fields (141:48).
  • “Nissan is the king of [the shell game] at this point...you see a 96 Taurus come through the auction lane, it brings $300.” – John (143:48)

9. Show Growth & Market Expansion

• Show is growing, adding new markets: Corpus Christi, Midland, Oklahoma City.
  • “We’ll have 20 markets by the end of this month…” – John (103:32)
• Listener gratitude, haters-turned-fans, live party plans in several cities.

🗣️ Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On car maintenance vs. girlfriends:
  “You could keep up a Hispanic 28-year-old girlfriend with two children, an apartment, and a Cadillac cheaper than you can keep that [Porsche] maintained.” — John (07:09)
• On car offers:
  “If we don’t beat your CarMax offer, I’ll either give you $100 or I’ll kiss your ass. It’s kind of like the McRib.” — John (09:39, 10:56)
• Bob Floyd’s Dope Report:
  “Negotiation. That’s the word, negotiation.” (06:36)
• On sports shame wall:
  “We’re not creating a wall of murder...We’re creating a Wall of Shame.” — John (19:02)
• On TV band selection:
  “They brought this dead horse and set it up on stage and put pearls on its head.” — John (20:24)
• On convertibles:
  “...even like a Porsche 911, the cab is worth less money than the hardtop. Because...your girlfriend can’t drive it.” — John (148:21)
• On the car industry scams:
  “So they know they've got you for a thousand if they can find anything within the rules.” — John (130:19)
• On mom's Aspen move:
  “She literally loaded up her Buick estate wagon and drove to Aspen, Colorado...put it in a storage deal, got an apartment and went to work at the polo shop.” — John (105:25)
• On money and personality:
  “Money just makes you more of what you naturally were.” — Michael Turley (107:23)

⏰ Important Timestamps (MM:SS)

• 03:00 – Houston listener party plans; show milestone.
• 04:00–06:40 – Bob Floyd’s first “Dope Report” of the year, marijuana legality.
• 09:39, 10:56 – “$100 or I’ll kiss your ass” CarMax guarantee.
• 18:21 – Discussion of the “Wall of Shame” in sports.
• 20:18–23:00 – Jackopierce/“Jack O Crap” and Dallas TV roast.
• 30:45–34:17 – “White, Black, Latino, or Other?”: the bike caper.
• 41:20, 51:44, 84:46 – Notable car call-ins and deal haggling.
• 77:21 – Randy the Chipmunk: “iguanas dropping, acid trip” story.
• 128:55–133:03 – Explaining arbitration scams at auto auctions.
• 141:48, 143:48 – Nissan, Altima oversupply — auto market lessons.
• 147:19 – Best value in used diesel trucks—Dodge Cummins.

🎸 Show Tone & Style

The show is raucous, Southern-flavored, deeply irreverent — no sacred cows, quick to mock bad local programming, dealers, pop culture, and themselves. The hosts banter effortlessly, with stories morphing into satire and character skits. At its heart, the show is a unique blend of real automotive expertise, wild radio comedy, and Texas-Oklahoma life, all underpinned by a spirit of self-deprecation and nostalgia.

📍 For New Listeners

This episode is a full-bore sampler of the John Clay Wolfe Show — equal parts car bazaar, comedy club, local sports commentary, and Gonzo AM radio. Whether you’re a car enthusiast, radio nostalgist, sports junkie, or just need a wild, unfiltered window into Texas life, this show delivers unpredictable radio with a wink.