#137 John Clay Wolfe Show 02/24/18

Summary

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The John Clay Wolfe Show - Episode #137 (02/24/18)

Date: February 24, 2018
Podcast: The John Clay Wolfe Show
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Description: Free-wheeling, irreverent talk about cars, sports, life in Texas, rock & roll, Mardi Gras, and beyond, driven by listener calls and powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com.

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Episode Overview

This raucous episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show is a high-octane mix of car-buying calls, wild party stories, comedy bits, candid takes on sports and pop culture, and uniquely Texan banter. John and his panel (JD, Bobbo, Turley, DJ Pre K, and more) field car sales live on air, riff on everything from Mardi Gras to auction hijinks, and roast each other and callers alike with trademark wit. Special segments and memorable callers—like Pinky calling collect from a Louisiana jail—keep the laughs rolling.

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Key Discussion Points & Memorable Moments

1. Car Talk & Live Offers

• John and the team field countless listener calls from across Texas, Louisiana, and beyond, offering real-time bids on cars, mostly trucks, Corvettes, BMWs, and even a rare 88 Mercedes 560SL.
• Frequent reminders of the show’s hook: if GiveMeTheVIN.com doesn’t beat a CarMax offer, they pay you $100.
• Example bidding blitzes:
  • “20 grand if it’s slam, slam, slamming ass nice.” — John (52:01)
  • “Take a picture of their offer letter loaded into GiveMeTheVIN.com and I’ll beat it by $200.” — John to caller Carla, (77:10)

2. Mardi Gras Aftermath & Wild Party Stories

• Panelist Randy recounts a raucous New Orleans Mardi Gras: drinking, passing out, getting his “claws” painted, and a brief stint in jail.
  • “They painted your claws?” — John (06:17)
  • “And locked me up…They let you go at 6 o’clock no matter what the charge, during Mardi Gras.” — Randy (08:02)
• Hannah the stripper laments how the influx of amateurs flashing for beads is ruining the pro lap dance business:
  • “They’re killing the main stage market…by the time real men with money get to the club, nobody has enough for a lap dance.” — Hannah (23:30)
• Pinky, Hannah’s nephew, calls collect from jail after being arrested for selling Flintstone vitamins as LSD at Chuck E. Cheese.
  • “For each one, I got $20.” — Pinky (25:17)
  • “Don’t clap, don’t encourage him. The little bastard.” — Hannah (25:23)

3. In-Studio Car Buying Tales

• Stories about eccentric sellers, like the cattle rancher who insists on signing everything in purple pen and only accepting cash.
  • “He tried to sign that contract for his soul, right, with a pink pen. I couldn’t believe it.” — Panelist (31:46)
• Reminders on how GiveMeTheVIN makes the car-selling process quicker than CarMax, with instant offers and real checks.

4. Sports, Scandal, & Culture Commentary

• The show cracks jokes about Mark Cuban’s Mavericks front office scandal, the team tanking controversy, and his record-setting fine.
  • “He was fined $600,000 just for saying he wants his team to start losing.” — Panel (13:59)
• College basketball bribery scandal: coaches, boosters, and sneaker companies in hot water for paying players.
  • “So the big scandal finally came out... FBI is the one actually busting this case.” — Turley (138:04)
• Black, White, Latino, or Other: DJ Pre K’s ethnic guessing game based on news stories, with the panel weighing in:
  • “There’s almost a blatant respect for the language there…he’s got to be a white guy.” — Bobbo (46:23)
• Olympics coverage: Goofy riffing on curling, Ivanka Trump appearances, and why curling is “Eskimo cornholing.”
  • “They stand in a squat all their life, so all they are is butt muscle…It’s a walnut cracker is what it is.” — John (110:35)

5. Auction Antics & Behind-the-Scenes

• John explains how high-stakes car auctions work—including selling a Lamborghini for $371,000 (which still lost money).
  • “Don’t assume price means win...just because you sell something high doesn’t mean you made no damn money.” — John (83:46)
• Panel cracks wise about the auction environment, managing scores of cars, and “sell them all” philosophy.
  • “It’s live ammo. The bullets can go any direction. It may kill me. It may kill them…It’s a show, okay?” — John (108:14)

6. Personal & Relatable Tangents

• John debates the dangers of new “big mouth” Miller Light cans and slippery slope of easy-drinking beer.
  • “With that product, I cannot manage my alcohol.” — John (100:09)
• The team jokes about dating, groupies, and auction-week hangovers.
  • “I buy cars on the radio. GiveMeTheVIN.com.” — John (64:00, 131:21… basically all episode!)
• Reverend Charles gives an on-air wedding blessing to Mario and Leslie.
  • “In the name of true love...and just be godly.” — Reverend Charles (42:29)

7. Recurring Show Characters & Comedy Skits

• Clock the Rooster dispenses wisdom on love and chicken parts.
• Buster Dix (Austin’s fictional politician) weighs in on NAFTA.
• “Rush Limbaugh” calls in with satire about Ivanka and Tiffany Trump.
  • “Just happy, happy Saturday. God, it’s a beautiful day...Do you see the asses on those Oriental curlers?” — “Rush” (86:07)
• Strip Club DJ’s car shenanigans and stories about staff hijinks, including the wheel swap caper.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “You keep drinking and you keep enjoying yourself. Don’t drive. Don’t get hurt.” — John to James the Drunk, (37:02)
• “I quit them. I quit them. I quit them about four months ago…and I sat there and had a few beers and I got sloppy ass.” — John on quitting Big Mouth Miller Lights (101:19)
• “If you want to sell it, go to GiveMeTheVIN.com and load it up…and I’ll give you a hard offer if you want to sell it.” — John (130:50)
• “I can’t just bless your marriage, I’ve got to talk to you about things.” — John, before on-air wedding blessing (38:05)
• “I was born at night, but it wasn’t last night.” — Listener, on car scam (71:02)
• “Is scrotum a bad word?” — John (77:49)
  “Yes.” — JD (77:49)
• “We need geeks—you’ll never be allowed to touch the money.” — Panel, on hiring PHP devs (152:36)

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Recommended Segments (Timestamps)

• Mardi Gras & Partying Gone Wrong: 06:00–10:00, 22:00–26:00
• Pinky's Collect Call from Jail: 24:50–26:02
• Mark Cuban Mavericks Scandal Discussion: 12:35–13:59
• Highest Auction Sale Ever (Lambo): 82:33–84:09
• Black, White, Latino or Other Game: 44:47–47:34
• Live Car Appraisals: Sprinkled throughout, e.g., 51:54–55:08, 113:49–117:00, 127:03–130:53

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Tone & Style

The show is brash, sarcastic, and full of wild, unfiltered humor. The crew loves nothing more than spinning real-world stories into comedy, teasing each other, taking listener calls, and throwing in a little wisdom between the wisecracks. If you like your car talk with a heavy pour of chaos, wit, and Texan flavor, you’re in the right place.

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Conclusion

Episode #137 exemplifies The John Clay Wolfe Show’s distinctive mix of skilled car haggling, rowdy storytelling, and hilarious banter. Far more than just a car show, it’s a raucous slice of Texas and Southern culture, blending listener interactions with sharp takes on news, sports, and life.

To sell your car or just listen in for laughs:

• Visit GiveMeTheVIN.com
• Find the full show and podcast archive at johnclaywolf.com or on Podbean
• Tune in live for four jam-packed hours of “cars, sports, sex, drugs, and rock & roll…anything as long as it won’t get us fined by the FCC.”

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(All timestamps in MM:SS format as per source transcript)

Transcript

[A]

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[D]

Givemethe. Vin.com presents crank it up.

[B]

It's red hot.

[E]

I'm digging it.

[D]

Give me the vin. The john clay wolf show.

[B]

Want you to sign your contract. Want you to sign today only. Giving lots of money. Working for mca. Morning Bone.

[F]

Rock and roll.

[B]

Are you working for mc? Working for the man.

[F]

Good God, man. Excellent track. I love Molly Hatchet, man.

[B]

They rock ass.

[F]

Best. Skinner. John and I were driving back from Houston. It was last week, week before last.

[B]

Two weeks ago, listener party in Houston.

[F]

He played okay. First on the lineup, Poison Whiskey and then Giving back my Bullets. I said, wow, John, you listening to the Is that Working for MCA album? He goes, no, it's greatest hits, man.

[B]

How's it go?

[F]

Look at.

[B]

No, it's greatest hits, man. It's Skinner greatest hits, man.

[F]

It's not that high pitch.

[B]

Listen to him taking up from me. He's been making fun of my voice for 10 years and now he's gonna take up for me. Oh, man, it's not like that. Anybody's gonna call you assistant. It's gonna be me, not yourself and not anyone else.

[F]

Good morning, John Clay Wolf.

[B]

Hi, J.D.

[G]

Good morning, Johnny.

[F]

Morning, Bubble and Michael Charlie.

[B]

What's the weather doing everywhere else? Because in Dallas, Fort Worth, it sucks.

[G]

Yeah, it's pretty nasty all over North Texas.

[B]

Actually, there's a lot of South Texas that we're on.

[G]

I realize that I'm looking that up right this second as we speak.

[C]

Weatherman J.D.

[B]

Ryan.

[F]

Let's see.

[B]

Yeah, J.D. give us the. Does anybody ever do weather reports for interstates like. Yeah, 100 mile stretches.

[G]

Sirius XM radio.

[B]

If you're heading down 35 between Dallas and San Antonio, watch out for icy conditions.

[G]

Pretty much the whole state.

[B]

Watch out for Mexicans running across 35 that jumped the border four hours ago. There's a big swarm of them.

[G]

Pretty much Corpus, San Antonio, Houston, all the way to New Orleans and all the way to Oklahoma City. So everywhere we're broadcasting, everywhere we're broadcasting, it's currently raining.

[B]

It's hot and wet. Okay. If you're with a woman, not a damn if you're in the jungle. But it's not hot when it's cold and wet. Cold weather, you never heard that Yeah, I have. It's a good morning. Vietnam, huh?

[F]

Is there still any kind.

[B]

Good morning. Hang on, hang on. Caller's got here. What you got, dude? What's up? What's up? You're on there. Hello, caller, line one, you're on the air. Hello?

[E]

Hey, man, I have a problem in Houston.

[B]

What's your problem in Houston?

[E]

Well, it's the fourth largest city in this country and the first. And they don't give the first hour of your show. Not only that, they have another car show between 8 and 9.

[B]

Oh, is that on 97.5.

[E]

Yeah. I don't know what to do with those kids.

[B]

It's, it's. It's interesting you say that. So in Houston, we're in a weird dynamic. We. We do 8 to 11 on the buzz and then we do 9 to 12 on ESPN. And it's kind of a. We started on ESPN years ago. We just started on the buzz a couple of years ago. So you just jump around like crisscross?

[E]

I would say let Randy take care of it.

[B]

Randy could take care of it. Randy could take care of it.

[E]

William, take care of it after nine so I can hear it.

[C]

Okay, well, go to 94. Buzz.

[B]

Yeah, we're on the buzz right now. 94.

[C]

Five.

[E]

Well, you know, it's. I have to go back and forth. It's just. It's problematic.

[B]

He's worse than my old lady and she's bad.

[E]

Hey, I'm the one that sent a card, okay? I'm a little hardcore.

[H]

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[E]

Hey, Randy, how are you?

[H]

If you take your buzz right now.

[G]

Are you drunk again?

[H]

You're a dumb ass.

[B]

What?

[H]

Yeah, he's drunk. These guys could tell you.

[G]

Hey, I went to Marty Gr8, 11 on Saturday morning. Mar was over a week ago.

[H]

I don't know what this case. Stop it, man.

[G]

Good.

[H]

I'm the king of the beads.

[G]

Marty. Girl, it was over a week ago. You can't stop drinking. Oh, cuz.

[H]

I brought my cousin back with me.

[G]

30 days in rehab for you.

[H]

Yeah, I probably should. I probably should go to the hospital.

[G]

Hospital?

[H]

Yeah.

[G]

Yeah. Are you really that bad?

[H]

No, I feel great.

[G]

I bet you do.

[H]

We're having a ball.

[B]

Did you find any women in New Orleans?

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

White women, black women, mixed women. What'd you get? High yellow zooli tamales?

[H]

I don't know, but I was passed out at this one place.

[B]

Yeah.

[H]

And they painted my claws.

[B]

They painted your claws?

[H]

Yeah.

[G]

I got this visual of all these people painting the claws on this little chicken.

[B]

Most people Shave eyebrows right on foreheads. But with the if you're a chick month, they just paint your claws.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

In like black and gold saints, like.

[H]

Between 9 and 11 in the morning. And it's not really Marty gr down there, cuz the police come.

[G]

Yes.

[H]

And I was trying to act regular.

[G]

Regular.

[H]

I said, oh, yes, sir, I'm doing very good.

[B]

When I was in college, Randy, I fell asleep, passed out. Call it what you will, at a college party. And a Lazy Boy recliner, leaned back, feet up, just went to sleep right there. Woke up the next morning, party was over. And I was looking in the mirror as I was taking my morning leak. You know how that goes. And I was like, man, I look bad. Wolf, you look bad. God almighty, you look bad. What happened to you?

[H]

Would you look bad?

[B]

I was bad, but. But I was. I couldn't. I looked so bad. I couldn't understand why I looked so bad. And then I realized that someone had shaved my eyebrows off.

[H]

It's like the Pink Floyd.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

You're that passed out.

[H]

He was comfortably dumb.

[G]

Comfortably numb.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

It really changes your. Your look, your street demeanor when you have no eyebrows.

[G]

Yeah, it does.

[H]

Just glad you noticed it though, because I was trying to act regular to this top and I had it passed off. I was acting totally straight. I said, you sure? I'm from Texas and I'm doing very good. Thank you very much, officer. And he saw my clothes.

[B]

Yes.

[H]

And locked me up.

[G]

You were locked up in jail in New Orleans?

[H]

Yeah. Really? Seven hours.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[H]

They let you go at 6:00 clock no matter what the charge, during Mardi Gras.

[B]

Really?

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

Good morning. You're on the air.

[E]

Morning.

[B]

Hey.

[H]

Morning.

[E]

How you doing?

[B]

I'm good. It's rainy, it's cold, and I just got up. What about you?

[E]

Oh, that's all right. That's just. I'm used to that back in New York. That's. Sure.

[B]

What's on your mind? You're on there.

[E]

Well, I got a. I got a. Well, I'm here in Texas now and I got a vet. I need to get rid of it. I got a baby girl sitting next to me and she's telling me she needs a bigger truck. Daddy, we're in Texas now.

[B]

Okay. What year's your vet?

[E]

14. Vet. 15,000 miles on it. She's nice. She's silver with black interior. And I didn't drive it down.

[B]

Oh.

[E]

From New York to get over here.

[B]

Does it have New York. Does it have Yankee license plates on it?

[E]

Yes, it does.

[B]

Oh, God. It's a 14 and we're an 18. Does it already have a bunch of rust?

[E]

Oh, man, I hope not, that's for sure. Now, I kept it clean and garage kept most of the time. Of course, I drove it once in a while. I mean it's got 15000 miles on it, but for the most part I kept the garage.

[B]

Is it an automatic or stick? Does it have navigation? Is it a which LZT thing is it which level?

[E]

It's a 2LP with a heads up display. I got the black rims on it is what I got. And I got a payoff though. I got a payoff and I'm trying to get to it. I heard you guys from other people saying, I'll give these guys a call.

[B]

Whatever the case will pay off your payoff. Shot me first, shot me last. Either way, come come see John clay. What's your payoff?

[E]

37.

[B]

Yep, that's exactly what I was thinking. Actually. It's a 14,000 mile one.

[E]

15. 15.

[B]

Yeah. You're fine. Where do you live?

[E]

Right now I'm in North Orson Hills.

[B]

Okay, here's what I'm gonna do. You bring it to me. Normally we come get it from you. That's our racket. But are you serious about this? Are you kicking tires and just jerking people off trying to be on the radio?

[E]

I need to move it.

[B]

Okay, well then get in the car. Come to. I'm gonna put you on hold. You can come over to our office. It's not far at all from Richland Hills. And I'll give you a thousand dollar check above and beyond your payoff because I can handle that. The spring market's here, man. The tax season's out. All the people are coming out of the treetops on vines with IRS checks. Checks in their back pocket, right? And they're landing like the invaders. They're landing at the car lots. I've had more reports in the past 48, 72 hours of my car lot guys doing record numbers. So it's 20 car days. 20 car days. It's not coming.

[G]

It's here.

[B]

It's here.

[G]

Tax money.

[B]

Remember what I kept saying? It's here. Okay. Mean, you don't have to be a, you know, mathematician to know that the government is going to release IRS checks.

[E]

Yes.

[B]

When is it going to hit? It is hit. Game on. So yes, Ed, I'm going to put you on hold and we will buy your car. Thank you, sir. Mike, I think we need to give him a sell that start the day off.

[F]

Right, yeah.

[E]

Sell that, sell that, sell that.

[B]

God, I sound so passionate. You are. No wonder my wife loves me.

[G]

Do you take that hose that you slam? Do you take that at home?

[B]

No, I don't take that. I have a backup.

[G]

Okay. You guys are old, into whips and chains.

[B]

No, I'm not into that. I get all that out on the auction block. I broke the auction block loose last week, but they put it back together and put a big. Like cousin Eddie. How he has a metal plate in his head.

[G]

You have a big plate?

[B]

Yeah, there's a big metal plate there now.

[G]

So you don't break the desk anymore.

[C]

It actually sounds better, too. When you're watching online, you can hear that snap.

[G]

Yeah, well, you're hitting.

[E]

Yeah.

[G]

You're hitting metal instead of.

[B]

Good.

[G]

That's great.

[F]

You got one of these at home.

[B]

Well, one of those hoses. Yeah. I just beat my kids with them.

[F]

50 Shades of John Clay.

[G]

You don't beat your kids.

[B]

No, I need to beat my kids.

[G]

You don't.

[B]

My kids need to be behaved. Your kid was up here the other day.

[G]

Y' all wouldn't even know he was here.

[C]

Yeah, he was in the office.

[B]

We had him doped up with electronic devices.

[G]

I doubt that very seriously. He's so well behaved.

[B]

I mean, you give him roadblocks.

[G]

Yeah, he's one that's probably going to have a, you know, prisoner number at some point, but most of them are very well behaved.

[B]

8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. You can just go to. Give me the. If you want to sell your car, go to giveme the vin.com. phones are working. Everything's cool. What we're saying, Mike Turley.

[C]

Well, we should probably have your son sign the waiver when he walks into the buying office.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Too much cousin.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

We didn't know he was there.

[B]

Yeah. Which one?

[C]

Man waiver that Mark Cuban probably could have used, too.

[B]

What happened to him? Mark?

[G]

Oh, you haven't heard?

[C]

So, yeah, there's a couple people in his. That was employed by. By Mark Cuban, his company. CEO, and I believe it was a beat writer that just had some improper. They had allegations. These are allegations with women.

[B]

Sexism in the office. Let me guess. You got it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It's amazing.

[G]

Me, too. Hashtag.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

So he's. He's trying to kill you. And they investigated it and they covered it up by the law.

[B]

I mean, Cuban.

[G]

Allegedly.

[C]

Yeah, allegedly. This is all allegations.

[B]

What did he do to slap an old gal on the booty?

[C]

Oh, I don't.

[B]

They.

[C]

They haven't said what has been done.

[B]

Did he tell her his fantasy was to do a lot of the conference room table? Yes.

[C]

A lot of that talk. Oh, yeah, there was a lot of that type of talk.

[B]

Nothing. Nothing. You ever been in the Mile High Club, honey? How about the Five Mile High Club, honey? Me too.

[G]

Me, too.

[B]

Hell, J.D. probably let Cuban do him at the Five Mile High. If Cuban would offer to throw J.D. down across the conference table in his. In his Gulfstream jet at 5 miles in the air, he'd probably do it.

[C]

Now. This wasn't. Mark Cuban did any of this. It's just his employees.

[G]

No, no, not Mark Cuban.

[B]

Oh, no, no.

[C]

Mark wasn't involved in any way.

[B]

They're horny, horny, horny people.

[F]

What Mark Cuban did was he told Sports Illustrator, he told Michael Irvin on a podcast that the best thing the Mavericks can do right now is to tank. Right?

[C]

Oh, yeah, he did tell him that.

[F]

He fined 60,000 for that.

[C]

600,000.

[F]

600,000.

[C]

Just because he wants his team to start losing.

[B]

Just lose. How can you get fine for the truth?

[C]

It's a great question. And the NBA did.

[B]

That'd be like saying, I wish my hand in poker sucked. Because then the next hand I might do better.

[F]

Ask Pete Rose what kind of trouble you can get for something like that.

[C]

Oh, you know, why would you. Why would you want to watch the game? A lot of things would hurt.

[B]

Who's betting on the Mavericks anyway? Who cares? It's all about the Rockets and the Spurs. Dude in Texas. Yeah, the Mavericks, like, had their one LSD moment five or six years ago. Yeah, where we all tripped out and thought they won the national championship. And then we realized, give in.com if we don't beat your car mag software, we owe you 100 bones. It's that simple. Be right back.

[D]

Givemethevin.com presents the John Clay Wolf Show. We'll be right back after this.

[A]

We outbid them [e-mail] and to prove it, if we don't beat your CarMax offer, we'll pay you 100 bucks straight up and down. Give me the vin.com 45 seconds. Load your car in, get an offer. We'll come to your doorstep and pay you right there. Or pay off your payoff. If we don't beat your CarMax offer, we pay you $100. Look at our reviews. Google givemethevin.com and see it for yourself. It's awesome.

[F]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com so easy, you can do it in your underwear.

[D]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show.

[B]

Dylan in Louisiana, good morning. Dylan in Louisiana, good morning.

[E]

Yes. How y' all doing?

[B]

Good.

[E]

I just was wondering how Pinky been doing.

[B]

Oh, Hannah's little nephew Pinky?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Actually, we have her coming in in a minute, so hang tight and we'll. I'll ask her. I'll find out. I did not see Pinky here this morning, but I did see Hannah. What city you calling from?

[E]

Clackaman, Louisiana.

[B]

All right, we will get to the bottom of your inquiries here in a minute. Randy, where are you calling from? Benbrook, Home of the Great Lake and O2 Park Avenue. 103L Leather. What color?

[E]

It's silver.

[B]

Average, rougher, clean.

[E]

Well, actually, it's in perfect shape, except a guy just gave me a little bump in the back, and I think I can just change out the trunk lid and. And just move a little metal to get that latch to close.

[F]

Rough. Rough.

[E]

No, seriously. Seriously.

[B]

Joe Dirt.

[E]

Let'S put it this way. Let's put this way. What would be the difference of slave if the body was perfectly clean?

[B]

500.

[E]

Would I really get that much?

[B]

500. 500 versus a thousand. 500 versus 1500 is what the money is. I. I wouldn't. I wouldn't. Damn sure.

[E]

But here's the problem. It drives perfect. So it's worth just pounding that little metal back where the latch is, so.

[B]

And get a 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. We accidentally lost Randy and Benbrook in the wrecked Buick Park Avenue. The O2 model I take with 103. That just works perfect. Except that damn trunk deck just won't stay shut. We'll be back with more right after this.

[D]

Back with more of the John Clay Wolf show after this. Presented by GiveMeTheven.com.

[A]

Hear us out. We beat [e-mail] the quicker you can get that message across in your mind, the less money we have to spend on advertising. And we can even put more money in buying your cars. @givemethevin.com we are the newest. We are the biggest. We are the baddest online car buyer in the South. GiveMeTheVin.com if we don't beat your carmax offer, we'll pay you $100.

[F]

Sell us your car. You need the vin.com so.

[I]

So easy.

[F]

You can do it in your underwear.

[B]

Give me the vin.

[D]

Givemethebin.com and now, senor juan clay wolf.

[B]

What the hell Are we listening to now some hippie bs?

[F]

Awesome, man.

[C]

It's the Faces.

[B]

The Faces. Isn't it time? Midnight Rendezvous.

[F]

Ronnie Wood, Rod Stewart.

[B]

Oh no. Really? Wow. Is it old?

[C]

Yeah, but it was. Got popular again in 2009.

[B]

Oh, this is some. What do you call those people that buy old cadillacs that are 28 years old? Hipsters.

[G]

Hipsters.

[B]

This is some hipster song. Turley dug up some hipster track and he's surprised. I don't know. Well, let me tell you something, Turley. I'm not some freaky hipster.

[G]

It's on his.

[B]

Wearing my dad's ugly ties.

[G]

It's on his Starbucks highlight cd.

[F]

Yeah, listen to the hook, man. Listen to the hook.

[C]

Rod.

[B]

Aaron. 13 BMW 335. Is it a four door or two door or convertible? Huh?

[E]

Convertible.

[B]

Yeah, it's a convertible. So it's a turbo six cylinder convertible. Hardtop Convertible. And it's a automatic with. Does it have the 19 inch wheels? With the 18 inch wheels. Sport Package Navigation.

[E]

Any of this 19. It's. It's the M trim. Highest trim to the sport. Okay.

[B]

M Sport.

[E]

Yeah. And sport. Yep.

[B]

How many miles?

[E]

47.

[B]

So a 2013 BMW 3 Series convertible with 47 in an M Sport?

[E]

Yep.

[B]

Does 18 grand buy it. 10 grand buy.

[E]

That's. That. That's a good offer, but no, man, I. I can't get the 19.

[B]

The first. The first offer was 18 and you said that was good. And I just asked if 19. Those. I mean, where are we going?

[E]

I thought you said. I thought you said 19 to start with.

[B]

Where are we going in this project, sir?

[E]

You know, it's a garage car for me, so I'm not sure.

[B]

Okay, let's start over. Hang on. Let me call John Wolf and try to sell him my car. Hi. Hi. Aaron. My name's John Wolf. I'd like to buy your effing car. How much is it? How much is it?

[E]

I think I. You know, I think 23 will sell it.

[B]

Okay, well I think, I think. I think that's like full blown retail plus a dime. And. And that's. That's cool. Everybody has. I'd hate to price another man's property. You might need to get your little dealer's license and throw you a for sale. So here's what we tell people that need too much, which is fine, not too much, but full blown retail plus a dime would be a thousand. Over. Run an ad, don't get stabbed.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

Run an ad, but don't get stabbed. Because what we don't want our listeners to do is get stabbed from Craigslist crazies, right? So run an ad, but just don't get stabbed, okay? We don't want you to die. We want you to be happy. So. So just be careful in. And when you meet your Craigslist crazy, bring a gun so that you can fire back because they might just have a knife. And if they pull a knife out, you shoot their ass, man. And then you'd be like, yeah, had I not done this, had I sold it to John Wolf For 19, I wouldn't have got to shoot this guy and get away with it. Finally, I got to use that gun. See, Aaron, you learn a lot when you call in.

[F]

All right.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

All right. 800-800-7, 2, 3, 4. 800, 800 radio. Hannah. Oh.

[C]

Oh, yes. Hannah. We gotta get her on.

[B]

Good morning. Hannah. Hannah. Hannah. Hannah. Hannah. Hannah the stripper. What's wrong with you?

[H]

I'm so tired.

[G]

Why are you mad?

[H]

I've been.

[G]

You look.

[H]

Have you ever been to New Orleans?

[G]

Yeah, but it was, like, over well over a week ago.

[H]

It used to be so wonderful.

[B]

What happened?

[H]

I took my nephew, my little peanut. Pinky.

[G]

Pinky.

[H]

Captain Mardi Gras. God, it's hard to make any money out there anymore.

[G]

Why?

[H]

Because they've ruined Mardi Gras. Like, after Fat Tuesday, right? Everybody is a stripper. Oh, my God.

[G]

Oh, I got you.

[H]

It's like, what do you call it, where they take all the cows and make them all fat and delicious.

[G]

Make them all fat and delicious?

[H]

Yeah, they feed them up.

[B]

Feed lot. Feed, Feed lot.

[F]

Yeah, like Bourbon Street.

[G]

There like a.

[B]

Feed lies of what?

[H]

I mean, not every woman at Mardi Gras is a cow. But they're not dancers.

[G]

They're not like you.

[B]

Okay, so there's a lot of heavyset women down in Mar.

[H]

Look at me.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[H]

Look at my baby.

[B]

There's the right one, and there's the left one. Good morning, everybody. I'm awake.

[H]

Okay. I'm a dancer. 99.99999999% of the women in New Orleans for Mardi Gras are not dancers.

[G]

No, they're not. They're just people enjoying the time.

[H]

And they show their disgusting real boobs for stupid beads. And so what happens? And they're killing the main stage market.

[G]

Oh, I got you.

[H]

And the bar stage. By the time any real men with money get to the club, nobody has enough for a lap dance.

[B]

Pinky is online. Five.

[H]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

And we had to answer the call. Collection. Like from the jail.

[G]

What?

[H]

I should never have taught him that.

[B]

What? Hang on. Pinky, are you there? Pinky? Good morning. Are you there? Pinky, you're on the air. Can you hear me?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

What? What? Why did you call me? Why did you call the show collect? Are you looking for your aunt? Are you okay?

[H]

I'm okay.

[B]

Well, how was your trip in New Orleans with her?

[H]

Well, it went horrible.

[B]

What happened?

[H]

I had to spend the whole night with her.

[B]

Where?

[H]

In a hotel.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Why?

[H]

Well, because she couldn't afford a much bigger hotel room. And we didn't have a home in New Orleans.

[B]

But she told me you. You went to jail. Are you in jail right now?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

Pinky's in jail.

[H]

And he is such a little liar.

[B]

He's in jail.

[F]

Collect.

[B]

Why are you in jail, Pinky?

[H]

Well, because I shelled red vitamins. All people, they were lsd. I know, right?

[B]

He did.

[H]

No, he did.

[F]

He did.

[B]

You sold Fred Flintstone vitamins and told people they were lsd?

[E]

Yep.

[B]

How much were you getting for each one?

[H]

For each one, I got $20.

[C]

Wow.

[H]

No, don't clap. Don't encourage him. The little bastard.

[B]

What do you think he learned?

[H]

I took him to Chuck E. Cheese.

[G]

Where do you think he learned this.

[H]

On a Wednesday morning at 11am and he's hunting up all the dads. Oh, he's bonding.

[G]

Getting a.

[H]

And he's selling Fred Flintstone vitamins and telling these guys they're lsd. And of course, they're all wives or hungover. And they're the ones that have to take the kids to Chuck E. Cheese.

[G]

Oh, my God.

[H]

And I was in jail. Yeah, in New Orleans.

[F]

When are we.

[B]

Pinky, how do we get you out of jail? We need to bust you out. Are you there, Pinky?

[C]

The collect calls. Time's up.

[G]

Yeah. You only get a few minutes.

[B]

We'll be right back. I'm gonna try to find him. I'm gonna try to find the kid. We'll be right back. You want to ride in my big black? Promise? Want to go up? I know who you are.

[D]

We'll be right back. More of the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemethevid.com. coming up.

[A]

Are you tired of getting beat by the dealership? Check in with givemethevid.com. sell us your car. We want to buy your car. And nine times out of 10, we'll pay more money than your dealer will on trade. Just load it into our website, givemethevin.com and we will come to you and pick it up and pay. Look at our reviews online. They're incredible. We've done tens of thousands of transactions. It's the Amazon.com of the car business. Give us a try.

[F]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[D]

Givemethevin.com and now back to the John Clay Wolf Show.

[E]

You are the best radio personality I've heard.

[D]

Call in 800. 800 radio, presented by gimmetheven.com.

[B]

So we had. My name is John Clay Wolf, by the way.

[E]

Good morning.

[G]

Good morning.

[B]

Hannah, our stripper friend was in a minute ago, had a guy call and say, who is Pinky? Who's that kid? They're worried about the kid. So Pinky is Hannah's nephew and he got arrested for selling Flintstone tabs. Selling them as lsd. Just so. And of course, in Louisiana. So he's in a Louisiana jail. And I'm gonna call my friend and Baton Rouge, who's an attorney, and try to get him out.

[C]

Oh, that's nice of you.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. If you like to sell your car and get the top money for it, go to givemetheven vin.com or just put in your license plate. If giving the VIN doesn't beat your carmax offer, they'll send you a check for $100. Or you can just call into the show and I'll bid it right here for him. Michael Turley, good morning.

[E]

Morning.

[B]

Morning, Bobbo.

[F]

Yes, sir. John Clever.

[B]

J.D. ryan, what was your week like?

[G]

Good morning. It was a wonderful week.

[B]

It was.

[G]

It was a little different. I was up here working on some radio, some new radio commercials. One of the sales people had a very unique person drop by on up here.

[B]

Give me the event office next door.

[G]

Yes, right. Right next door. I was just walking through and the gentleman came up here to drop off his car.

[B]

Very interesting. To sell his car.

[G]

To sell his car.

[B]

Interesting.

[G]

He was. He was telling people, first of all, he doesn't dance with anyone. Of course, no one was trying to dance with him. He also talked about talking to his cows and how they talk back and have an actual conversation.

[B]

So this is a seller of Give me the van. And he's dropping his car off and he's telling some. Some detailed stories about his life.

[G]

Correct.

[B]

How. What was his age?

[G]

He was about 55.

[B]

What was he driving?

[G]

60.

[C]

An FJ Cruiser.

[B]

Really? Toyota. Got a little hippie, little LSD, a little flashback. That's what you were hearing?

[E]

Yeah.

[G]

And he had taken the.

[B]

Let me tell you something. Cattle farmers don't drive FJ Cruisers.

[G]

He'd taken the heat sensing camera off of it.

[B]

Yeah. Yes.

[G]

He again told me about the cows.

[B]

Why did he do that?

[G]

I. I don't know, but because it was on there and it was a $10,000 addition that apparently the buyer didn't want to buy.

[B]

10,000?

[G]

That's what he said. Yeah.

[B]

That's a lot. Heat sensing camera on FJ Cruiser?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

Okay, so what. What else did he.

[G]

It just got stranger from there. He didn't want to sign any documents. He had a purple pen. He wanted to sign all the documents. Well, you know, legally you can't do that as a. I heard the people in the office. The office people.

[B]

You can sign in purple pen. You can what document?

[C]

The title.

[G]

The title.

[B]

Oh, okay. That's not a document. A title.

[E]

Okay.

[G]

The title. It looked like a documentary.

[B]

Yeah. You can't sign that in crayon.

[G]

I'm not in this business with you, man.

[B]

You can't sign a title in crayon.

[G]

No, it was. It was purple.

[B]

So he wouldn't do it.

[G]

No one could touch him. No one could get near him. And he had to sign his. In his document in purple.

[C]

Well, and that's when I came in.

[B]

Hang on, let me. Let me be clear. Documents, like papers, papers, titles, or titles, you can't sign a title. Well, did he sign the title in purple?

[G]

He tried.

[C]

That's when I was brought in. And so I. I came in there because they're the logistics ladies came by and said, hey, you know, he wants to sign in purple. I was like, well, we can't do that. How about this?

[B]

It is Mardi Gras, though, because.

[C]

Yes, it is. And they told me he's a little bit like a germaphobe. It's like, all right, let's get a brand new box of pens. I'll bring it to him. It's like, hey, look, here's some pens. You pick one. It hasn't been opened yet. You can sign on that. Because that's what I thought the problem was. Just walk in there, present it to him. He's like, oh, I got a black pen right here. He just, I have to sign in purple. It's just I have everything I've ever bought. I sign in purple. Anything.

[B]

I said, well, you're selling a guy like that. Sounds like, was he okay with your check or was he all weird about that?

[G]

It got better.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

Then he Wanted to go with the buyer down. You know our bank's right down the street, right. He wanted to go down and get cash money before.

[B]

Green cash.

[G]

Green cash before the bank, before the buyer comes leave.

[B]

Why didn't we just wire it to him?

[G]

Because he. Oh no, we don't do wires. That's. The government's watching that. We don't do wires.

[B]

God, Satan.

[G]

So he wanted. He want. I don't want to see how much money. But it was a lot of cash.

[B]

How much cash was it?

[G]

$27,500 in his pocket when he left the bank?

[B]

In hundreds.

[G]

In hundreds.

[B]

What did the bank think y', all, when y' all showed up wanting 27. 5.

[C]

Cuz they don't.

[G]

I was said they rolled their eyes like we don't even know.

[B]

They don't even have that much cash.

[G]

They normally don't, but they found it.

[C]

It was early in the morning. So he hit him up right the right time.

[B]

5 o' clock in the morning, so. Satan, what are you doing?

[E]

I think I know this guy.

[F]

Yeah.

[E]

61 years old.

[F]

Yeah.

[G]

Real nice guy. Really nice.

[E]

Pretend cattle rancher.

[G]

Yeah. FJ Cruiser, right?

[E]

What a pain in the ass.

[G]

Oh no.

[E]

Yeah, I've been trying to get this guy for 30 years.

[G]

He was really nice.

[E]

What a tough negotiator. He tried to sign that. That contract for his soul, right. With a pink pin. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it.

[F]

I told Gabriel, Gabriel's like, no way.

[E]

I said, yeah, yeah.

[B]

So you had him down in the closing booth ready to sign and all, and he insisted on a pink pen. So in the, in the rules of the Antichrist, it's pink pin not apply.

[E]

Right? Yeah. No, you can't do that. It's not binding. It's not binding.

[F]

You can you give that to St.

[E]

Peter and he'll laugh his ass off.

[B]

Adam, in Houston, a 16 XTS with 49. Have you already been to the website? Give me the vin.

[E]

No, sir.

[B]

Loaded up in there. Because I've got five minutes left before the next thing and I've got to play this drunk caller from Oklahoma that called in at the end of the show last week that I think most people missed. Adam, go to givemetheven.com and my computer will bid the car immediately. You're in Houston. What's the weather in Houston this morning?

[E]

Rainy, drizzling?

[B]

Yeah, it's pretty bad. Okay, so last week, like right at the end of the show, some stations, I figured the people that listen at 8 o' clock. Don't listen at noon.

[G]

Probably not.

[B]

Of course it was from Oklahoma. I mean, let's start there, right? I don't even think I want to say anything. I'm just gonna let it go. Let this. Let this piece speak for itself. I hope the guy's still alive into itself. Okay. James. Oklahoma, James.

[E]

Hello?

[B]

Hey, what's up?

[E]

I'm just. I'm getting up and I'm drinking.

[H]

All right.

[B]

Congratulations. Thank you for calling in and sharing your party with us.

[E]

Glad y'.

[B]

All.

[E]

Rock and roll.

[F]

Rock and roll.

[B]

What are you nipping on, boss?

[E]

Huh?

[B]

What are you drinking?

[E]

Oh, beer.

[C]

Yeah?

[B]

What kind of beer?

[E]

Well, Milwaukee's the best right now.

[B]

What time is it? Right? It's 11:15. What time did you get started on this beer? I'm gonna say you got started on this beer at 8:30 this morning.

[E]

Yeah, about that time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like your radio station.

[B]

I'm.

[E]

I'm 57 years old and I started rocking, rolling back in about 1976.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

And they had some good radio stations on, but not like this one.

[G]

Who dialed your phone.

[B]

Now, I hear what you're saying, James, in the broken words you're using. I've heard this before. What you're saying is this show on Saturday morning reminds you of that late 70s FM vibe that you used to hear of. Loose, Loose lip, radio jocks and fun and not scared to talk about real stuff.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Well, I'm glad you pointed that out because I know I met about 300 people last week in Houston that feel the same way. And I'm glad that we're a place for everybody to get together on Saturday and. And have a good time and relax and feel like they're amongst friends.

[E]

Oh, I. I had a motorcycle wreck.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

In Houston.

[B]

Ouch. Ouch.

[F]

Yeah.

[G]

How long ago?

[E]

Oh, 1980.

[B]

Did it screw you up bad?

[E]

It shattered my. My skull.

[G]

So you're thinking alcohol is the best way to.

[F]

Oh, stop it, jd, in case you just join.

[B]

Let this man be happy. We're not going to listen to happy. I know it. JD's a recovered alcoholic, so he always has to dive in on everybody and try to take the fun out of it. He likes to steal. He likes to steal the oxygen out of the room.

[G]

That's not true. I'm trying to get to save this guy's life.

[F]

And there's this parive. Why we have JD on the show. It's campfire time on the John Clay Wolf Show.

[G]

Let your listeners die off.

[F]

One roadie's Getting some stuff ready for us to put on the air.

[B]

James, would you rather be sober, completely sober, never be able to drink again, or would you rather be dead?

[F]

It's a good answer.

[E]

Yeah, usually I drink 10 point beer from a liquor store.

[B]

I think that's our answer. I'm with you, James. You keep drinking and you keep enjoying yourself. Don't drive. Don't get hurt.

[E]

Yeah, I don't have a car.

[B]

Keep rocking and rolling, keep tuning in. And when you pass, I want you to tell your heirs, friends, whoever's gonna handle your funeral, if it's 20 years from now, 10 years from now, whenever it is, that to let us know because I'm gonna do a eulogy for you on the air and it's of a super fan. You're a super fan.

[E]

All right, I'll call in my obit.

[B]

Okay, thanks, James. Call in his obit. So speaking of preaching, here we've got Mario and Leslie from Joshua, Texas. Good morning. Mario and Leslie, you there? Hello. Hey, hey, hey, hey. What are y' all doing? What's the deal? You're on there.

[E]

Well, we're just in the car driving to Walmart things before our wedding today at 2.

[B]

Good, good. What do you need me to do?

[E]

Huh?

[B]

What do you need me to do?

[E]

I just need you to bless our wedding. We listen to you every Saturday. And we're not country hicks or anything. I promise you do hang.

[B]

Time, time, time, time, time. I've got a lot of questions. I can't just bless your marriage. I've got to talk to you about things. So wait, wait. In this country hicks, I mean, live in Johnson County? A, I know where Joshua is and B, how long have you lived there?

[E]

We've lived out here since 04. I moved here from New Mexico in 04 and I met Mario. He's been here all his life. He's from Godly. Godly finally getting married.

[B]

Okay. His does Mario ever had a meth problem?

[E]

No, he hasn't.

[B]

And he did live in Godly. Hang on. Hey, y'.

[F]

All.

[B]

Y' all stay hooked or call back. I'm gonna put you on hold. We've got to go to break right now. Heart out. We'll be back in three minutes and I want to talk to you about this, but I think we can get this handled. Hang on a second.

[E]

Thank you.

[B]

My name is John Clear Wolf by cars the radio and obviously officiate weddings. To you, but here's a C. You better understand that I won't hold your hand, but if it helps you, man, I won't stop it. Go and save yourself and take it on me Go and save yourself and.

[E]

Take it on me.

[D]

Give me the vin dot com.

[E]

You guys make me laugh every Saturday morning, man.

[B]

It's awesome.

[E]

Love listening to y'.

[B]

All.

[D]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemethevin.com.

[B]

Good morning. Saturday morning. It's live. It's nine o'. Clock. My name's John. His name's J.D. we've got. We've got Turley, Bobbo, lots of people. DJ Pre K. Mario and Leslie. They're getting married. Reverend Charles is actually. Mario and Leslie called a moment ago. They want us to talk about their wedding that they're doing today. So I thought we'd bring. Let's bring the Reverend in. Good morning, Reverend. How are you, Reverend?

[F]

Lord, what a beautiful day.

[B]

Isn't it? Now, Mario, tell me we're not getting there yet. Mario, tell me, are you all there?

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

So how long have y' all been dating? You want me to bless your wedding? And I'd love to, and I'm flattered, but I want to. I take these things seriously. I mean, I'm not sure. Yeah. Great. So we got to talk about everything. So, Leslie, how many kids do you have together? We have.

[E]

Well, between the two of us, we have six.

[B]

Okay. And what are.

[H]

What?

[B]

What? What? Leslie, how old are you?

[E]

I'm 49.

[B]

And Mario, how old are you?

[E]

44.

[B]

Okay.

[F]

Lord, Lord.

[B]

Older women, beautiful lovers.

[G]

All right, stop that.

[B]

So out of these six kids, who's got what, three and three?

[E]

And he's got three. Yeah, I've got two boys and a girl. And he's got two girls and a boy.

[B]

Cool. Well, Joshua. Joshua has good schools.

[G]

It's a real live Brady Bunch.

[B]

If y' all are in Joshua school district, that's good.

[E]

They're all graduated. They're all graduated. All.

[B]

All six are gone?

[E]

Yes, sir. That's why we're finally getting married.

[G]

They're in their late 40s.

[B]

Yeah, dude, I'm 45. I've got a four year old.

[G]

That's your fault.

[F]

That isn't your fault.

[B]

Reverend Charles says that is my fault. So how long have y' all been together or dating or just whatever you. How long have y' all been in contact?

[E]

We met in O4.

[B]

Okay, well, that's a long time. Well, this sounds pretty good. It does. Has anybody spent any time in the can between 04 and now? I just wanted to make sure she wasn't, like, sitting outside your Deal like one of those, you know, things where. Where y' all met. And you're in Huntsville and she comes in every other Sunday.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, hell, yeah. Well, I mean, Reverend Charles, what. What do you think? What's your feeling? Can you have a prayer up for these folks? These fine, fine, fine folk, you know.

[F]

Lord, I want you to think about this.

[B]

Mario and Leslie Mario.

[G]

Mario and Leslie Mario.

[F]

These two fine, almost young peoples that are taking good care of their children.

[G]

Yes, they have.

[F]

And just because they started in Johnson county together, well, you know, they still capable of everything a relationship can be.

[G]

Of course they are.

[F]

In the name of true love, like the love that Jesus have. All the flock of sheep. And remember the name of Mario's hometown. And just be godly.

[G]

Godly.

[F]

Be godly. And keep yourselves intertwined together. And don't you bring home no ugly truck. Mayo.

[B]

What? And love.

[F]

Love will last you a lifetime. And probably about $56,000 a year.

[B]

What time. What time are y' all getting married today? What time are y' all getting married today?

[E]

At 2. We're having a little chapel up in Fort Worth. It's just a little small thing, just he and I.

[B]

Good luck. Thanks for calling in. So glad that you thought of us.

[E]

Well, we love your show. Thank you so much.

[B]

Thanks, Leslie. Sunny in Dallas is 64 impala SS. I don't know, man. Is that the one with the big fence on the ass end?

[E]

No, it don't have fins. 63 and 64, about the same body style.

[B]

Send me a picture. Go to. Give me the VI N. Give in dot com. Let me look at pictures because I don't have those body styles memorized. What. What city in Dallas? Dallas, Texas. Hollywood. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio is the call in number average, rougher, clean leather roof or nav your model. Miles, I can hang a number. DJ to the pre K. You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge. What up, what up, what up, what up what? It's time for that favorite game show, Black, White, Latino or other. Since we are in so many Louisiana stations, it should be black, white, coon ass, Latino or other.

[G]

Yeah, you gotta add that.

[I]

You want me start throwing that in there?

[B]

Maybe, maybe you think about it. Go ahead, what you got?

[I]

Well, today I got a good one for y', all, man. We got a. A man down in Florida that, if that tells you anything, that was sitting around board one night and decided to get down on a little target practice with his 9 milli. Only problem is he was inside his apartment. So he woke up his neighbors with a couple shots and they found holes in the wall that they share with Mr. Shoot him up. Bang Bang. 5o rolled up and found a bunch of books taped together with a big red target painted on them and a loaded nine. And he was locked up and released on ten thousand dollar bail. So what y' all think? White, black, Latino or other?

[B]

I have a personal story. I will use the first name C period, so that to protect those of the innocence. Last name Wagner. Well, there's that craziest bastard I knew. And he would. He was bad about shooting guns in his home. And I've been in his home when he starts shooting guns. And he went as far to go to. You can buy these metal traps that you could shoot your gun. So just in case you have that feel to shoot a gun in the house, you can shoot it into that metal trap.

[G]

You want to be Elvis, not shoot the tv.

[B]

Yep, yep. So he was very white. So I'm gonna go. This is very white thing to do. I think this is a white guy. DJ Pre k that instead of having the money to go buy the metal trap, living in an apartment, he might not have had as much disposable income as one c. Wagner. So he just created his own with books. What do you think, Bob?

[F]

Man, there's a. There's almost a blatant respect for the language there, you know, like, I want to kill these bugs. Is that illegal?

[G]

I don't think that was the point.

[F]

Is that a fringe thing? Is there a law against.

[G]

No, there's not.

[B]

Guns inside your home, Latino or other.

[F]

He's got to be white guy.

[B]

Just does, doesn't it? And there's no question he's been drinking. None whatsoever. What's your feeling?

[G]

I'm a good Latino. Just to be different. And every time you see the cops in Florida, they have a lot of Latinos. So I'm gonna go there.

[B]

Yeah, but it's harder for them to get guns. So the odds would not be as good because so many of them are Puerto Ricans and. And Cubans and they don't have licenses to get guns. Could be other. Could be other.

[G]

They don't all get licenses. I know that's hard to believe, but they don't.

[C]

I'm gonna go with other.

[E]

Other?

[B]

Yeah. You want to go throw a Hail Mary and call it a Cubana or a Puerto Rican?

[C]

Yes, I'll go with Cubana.

[B]

Okay. Okay. DJ Prek. Wow.

[F]

Five to one against.

[I]

Okay, man. It was Y' all are on point today. It was an old, decrepit Caucasian man. Ivan Bach from Florida.

[F]

He's a Nazi, too.

[B]

What did they do with him?

[G]

All right, all right.

[B]

Move it. You must get the rabbit. Eisenbach's time. He shot Dagger indoors.

[F]

Was he talking to the books?

[C]

If that's the case, he may be other.

[B]

Was it? Hey, hey, hey. Were the books like 3rd right books?

[G]

All right.

[F]

You will frighten me no more with Stephen Kink.

[B]

That's what he may have been bad at. Yeah. Angry German shooting. Old. Old Third Reich SS propaganda books. But all the pain that they've caused him and how wrong he was over the years, that's what really happened. DJ Prek, how are you liking your auction time and running our video board at the Dallas Auto auction?

[I]

Hey, man, I'm digging it. You know, I get to see some baller vehicles, you know, and I get to take pictures next to them, act like I own them.

[B]

Do you? That would be a whitey blackie kind.

[I]

Of thing to do for show, man. Gots to do it.

[B]

Hey, has. Do people. A lot of people know you from the radio. Is anybody putting two and two together at the auction in your. In your disco booth?

[I]

I think I've had one person notice me and say, are you DJ Pre K? And I said, yeah, that was about it. But not, man, not.

[B]

Not really.

[I]

Come say what's up. You know, I think you need to.

[B]

Throw them peacock feathers out a little bit. I think you need to. You're balling at the lot. Album cover. I think you need to hang that behind you. Just something. No, let them know you'll let them sell that.

[G]

A miracle right over the top of him. A little mirror ball with those spotlights come on. Everything else is going on in your booth, in your lane.

[B]

Dj. You have total clearance to be your own person in that. That DJ booth next to the auction block. You do with it what you will. Hold on.

[C]

So he's going to be selling this?

[B]

I think he needs to do whatever he feels right. And you've got to sell that. T shirts next to you. How long did those last the other day?

[I]

Oh, man, they. They ran out quick, man. Once I put them out there and showed them off, people came and grabbed them, man.

[B]

If y' all want a show shirt, our thousandth show shirts. Average, rough or clean. Sell that on the back. You can go to John Claywolf.com and hit the merch button. They're 20 bucks.

[E]

Now.

[C]

The alter ego, the buyer. Austin, did you see the vehicle that he bought this week.

[B]

I did not.

[C]

How did you not see this?

[B]

Well, I mean, I might have, but is it. Is it ghetto sled?

[C]

It's a.

[G]

What do you get?

[C]

2011 F150. Okay, that is the biggest Cowboys fan ever. Oh, I need 26.

[B]

Have you already put it on the show site, Austin?

[I]

No, I haven't. I'll put it up right now.

[B]

Why am I having to tell you how to promote some social media? Why do I have to do everything? At what point in this deal do I get to not have to make all the calls?

[I]

Oh, look, man, my bad. I just been buying up these cars, man. I've been busy.

[B]

When you see a country chicken fried white girl wearing Burberry plaid boots and a Texas tech red shirt standing in front of a F150 that's covered in black guys that are Dallas Cowboys, it says feed me on the side with 26 inch rims.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

I think that something in your brain should trip. Like, I think we should put this on the Facebook page. You don't need me to tell you that.

[I]

The John Clay will show Facebook page a whole lot.

[B]

Thinking ahead and like, you're the one that worked at Party City, not me. You should have your DJ Pre K balloons. I shouldn't have to tell you to do that, Ben. You got it. Sooner or later you have to grow up and you're going to have to think on your own. I can't be mixing all these tapes for you after hours. I've got a wife, man. I got four kids. I can't do all that. I can't be. You know, all this hood rat stuff that you've got me doing, I can't do it no more.

[I]

Well, you got some good hood rat ideas, man, you know. Hey, I'll take them. New DJ Pre K mixtapes coming to the next auction for sale. Okay, $5. Pop Holl at your boy.

[B]

8008-0072-3480-0800-Rodio. Good morning. Who's this? Oh my God. Reset the squelch on your CB. Hello? Go to givemetheven.com. load it up. Good morning. Who's this? Corey. Corey. What you got?

[E]

I got an 88 Mercedes 560 SL.

[B]

How many miles?

[E]

26,000.

[B]

20 grand. If it's. If it's slam, slam, slamming ass. Nice. Yeah.

[E]

20 grand. Yeah, that's nice.

[B]

Does that get it bought?

[E]

I'll go to the website.

[B]

Does that get it bought, Corey?

[E]

Sorry.

[B]

Does that get it bought?

[E]

I think so.

[B]

It should. I mean, I could have hitch at 10 and started dancing. But I just went ahead and popped her in the eye to get it bought. I know what you got. You know what you got. I want to get it bought. However, it's got to be right for the. For. For, you know, there's nice ones and there's okay ones. And those cars cost a fortune to get fixed and get running, right. And they break all the time. So what. What city are you in?

[E]

I'm in Houston.

[B]

All right, send me. Send me the deal. We bought a o. I think we're buying a 03 Ferrari down there. We'll send the highline rig after that. Yeah, we'll get it. Go to givemetheven.com but be real particular about problems. Any lights, any noises, any air conditioner? Like the. The air conditioner, when you go from cold to hot, it doesn't make the switch. The. The driver's seat on the passenger side. You know, the lumbar isn't working. I don't even think it has lumbar. But you follow what I'm saying. Be real bitchy about your description because it'll help me. Okay? Okay, thanks, man. 8008-007348-00800 radio. My name is John Clay Wolf and we just bought a 88 560SL on the air. My stepmom used to have one of those. I've got a whole story about that, too.

[D]

Back with more of the John Clay Wolf show after this, presented by GiveMeThevin.com.

[A]

Hear us out. We beat [e-mail] the quicker you can get that message across in your mind, the less money we have to spend on advertising and we can even put more money in buying your car. [e-mail] we are the newest. We are the biggest. We are the baddest online car buyer in the south. Givemethevin.com if we don't beat your carmax offer, we'll pay you $100.

[F]

Sell us your car. Givemethevin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[D]

Now back to the John Clay wolf show.

[B]

Steve carrollton. 13 silverado 2500hd. Four wheel drive. Diesel or gas?

[G]

Diesel.

[B]

Diesel. Cecil leather. No roof crew.

[E]

Cab leather. Yep. Lifted 35 inch mud grippers.

[B]

Okay. It's probably 35 to 40 grand. I need to see it. Go to givemetheven.com and send me some pictures. I need to see the pictures with the lift. Okay? You bet.

[E]

Man. It's a beautiful truck.

[B]

Perfect. Ben and Crowley. An 07F150 with 128 extended cam.

[E]

Yes. Good morning.

[B]

Good morning. XLT or Excel or what?

[E]

It's an xlt and it's a one owner.

[B]

All right. Three grand. Chris. 08 Corvette with 16. It's a pace car. In 08. It's a convertible. What color. What color was the pace car in 08? I wasn't paying attention back then.

[E]

It's black.

[B]

Okay, so it was the NASCAR pace car or the IndyCar pace car.

[E]

No, it's the Indianapolis 500 version. Yeah, like a 30 year anniversary. You know the 78 with the black and the silver.

[B]

Yep.

[E]

It. It's kind of like modeled after that has 78, 2008 on it.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

Kind of, I guess like a big brother kind of thing.

[B]

I wonder how the hell I missed that. I didn't see that. So is there any horsepower difference or. All cosmetic.

[E]

It's. Well, it's the same LS3. It's got the 436 horsepower, but it's got the. I guess the special interior, the headrest or their embroidered logo.

[B]

Is it. Is the graphics exterior. Are they decals or paint?

[E]

There are decals.

[B]

Okay. And it's a. Yeah, I put.

[E]

I sent pictures on. Give me the vin.com and I got an offer and I sent a counteroffer, but it said oops, if you would have sent us a counteroffer, we get back with you. I never got anything.

[B]

Oh, oops. Nothing in my program says oops. What? Anyway, when. When was that?

[E]

This morning, about 7:30.

[B]

Okay. They're just busy during the show day. They get slammed. So tell me this. Okay, what. What did. What was the offer that this computer gave you this morning? Give me the vin.com.

[E]

I think it was 22 to 24.

[B]

Okay. And what was your counteroffer?

[E]

26.

[B]

Okay. Cuz I was just thinking 25. So we're real close.

[E]

I need our clothes.

[B]

I need to see pictures of this car. Did you already send them?

[E]

Yeah, I sent three of them on there already.

[B]

All right, who's your buyer? What's their name? Do you know? It's on the bottom of your email. Can you see it?

[C]

Time pass?

[E]

Yeah. Nothing.

[B]

Anyway, reply back to him. Say, I just got off the air with John. He thinks he wants to give 25 grand. Flag him down after the show. And he will and we'll get with it. Thanks. My name is John Clay Wolfe. We're out of time. We'll be right back.

[D]

GiveMeTheVin.com presents the John Clay Wolf show. We'll be right back after this.

[A]

We outbid them [e-mail] and to prove it, if we don't beat your CarMax offer, we'll pay you 100 bucks straight up and down. Give me the VIN.com. 45 seconds. Load your car in, get an offer. We'll come to your doorstep and pay you right there or pay off your payoff. If we don't beat your CarMax offer, we pay you a hundred dollars. Look at our reviews online. Google givemethevin.com and see it for yourself. It's awesome.

[F]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[D]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemethe.vin.com.

[B]

800-800-7234 Good morning. Texas, Oklahoma lousy in Arkansas. All you hillbillies north, south and in between the coast. Hey, hey, hey, hey. It's raining, it's cold. It's good. Domingo. Dallas. Good morning, brother.

[E]

What's up, bro?

[B]

Not much. Not much. What's up with you, man?

[E]

I was listening to you talk to that guy on the phone about 15, 20 minutes ago, maybe.

[B]

About what?

[E]

All I know is you went Rain Man.

[B]

I went Rain Man?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Man.

[E]

Somebody said.

[B]

Oh, you thought I was. Yeah. Was that. What's he talking about, Charlie?

[C]

So when you bid, when you're thinking, you kind of do that going. It's Rain man esque.

[B]

Oh, I went weird. I got. I started. I showed my tick. Yeah. Kind of like Warren.

[C]

Warren.

[B]

And something about Mary. Don't touch his ears. Thanks, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Of course.

[F]

It's definitely. Definitely fugue state. Fugue state?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, that recently slipped out of my mouth.

[F]

You got several of those, man.

[B]

Little tickish ticks. Yeah.

[E]

Okay.

[G]

Yeah.

[C]

You do that a lot, too.

[B]

Hey, Ralphie. Oh, no.

[F]

I knew that was coming, dude.

[B]

Here we go. How about what was the deal? I know. Hey that you know that I know that you're looking at my ass. Come here, Ralphie.

[F]

I got an idea.

[B]

I'm gonna bend over, Norton.

[G]

All right?

[B]

When I bend over, you start. Wait to go there, Ralphie boy.

[G]

I just got a note here from one of the sales people.

[F]

Excuse me.

[B]

We don't have sales people, boss.

[G]

Oh, we have a buyer. I'm the buyer's room. My bad. Excuse me. Would you tell.

[B]

We ain't selling nothing to nobody. We're the dope man. We got the money. D.J. can you straighten J.D. out? He's got to understand the The. The world of the jungle.

[G]

I need to hang out around here during the week.

[B]

Okay, you know what?

[G]

All right.

[F]

No.

[G]

One of the buyers told me. Would you tell Bobbo his lights are on in his car, please?

[F]

Oh, I just got this. Oh, that's. That's Michelle.

[E]

What?

[G]

Your light. You call your car Michelle?

[F]

No, my girl. My girl came up with me. You met her earlier.

[G]

Oh, she out by the elevator.

[E]

Yeah.

[G]

Oh, well, that's Michelle.

[B]

Okay.

[F]

Decided to sit in the car.

[G]

She's in your car?

[F]

Yeah. It's dark and cold in here, so kind of. She starts up, hangs around.

[B]

Is she a groupie or girlfriend?

[F]

She's a little hippie chick, man.

[B]

She's awesome.

[C]

She's a groupie.

[B]

Palm of your hand, she's put in your back pocket like a pocket fisherman.

[F]

Yeah, well, you know, she's. She's a very nice girl.

[B]

Are y' all dating? Are you just hanging, staying?

[F]

I've been. I've been hanging around that woman for a long time, off and off.

[B]

Like. What's a long time? Three weeks or three years?

[F]

20 years.

[B]

Oh, she's steady. She's a homie.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. She. Y' all kick it. Yeah. See, y'. All, Y' all get together at least once a year just to keep the right, keep the bond alive. We're all in to swap. Swap DNA. Dale, good morning in Missouri. How are you?

[E]

Good.

[B]

Missouri. How are you listening to us in Missouri? We don't advertise in Missouri.

[E]

I'm down here in New Mexico working.

[B]

I'm on New Mexico. I didn't know I was there, either. You hear us on the radio in New Mexico. Cool. What city?

[E]

I'm down here in jail right now.

[B]

Okay, you've got a 07 Mustang GT with 41.

[E]

21.

[B]

21. It gets better, DJ Pre K. I know. Whitey Blackie on the. On the phone. When. When. I understand you. Dyslexia's a. And I understand a little bit of. What do you call it when you can't read or write? I'm not sure, but you must have it. Illiteracy. But. But you got to get the miles right. Okay, D.J. i was a.

[I]

Sorry, boss.

[B]

All right, all right. So, dale, it's a 21,000mile 07 Mustang. Is it a convertible?

[G]

God, no.

[E]

It's a hard top.

[B]

That is the worst. JD what do you call it when you can't read or write?

[G]

I don't know, Sean.

[E]

I think I like to call that yellow.

[B]

Is it. Is it a stick or an automatic?

[E]

Ice beat.

[B]

Leather, Cloth leather. Is it ten grand?

[E]

No.

[B]

Why?

[G]

Why?

[E]

I got an offer for a trade in a 12.

[B]

Why didn't you take it?

[E]

I just haven't traded it in. I've seen what you'd give me for it.

[B]

Where? What? Where was the trade in? At 12.

[E]

Starwoods Customs in Dallas.

[B]

Oh, you're buying one of those hot rod jeeps, man. I mean, you can. Hell, I could get. I could show you 20 if I was selling you a Jeep Wrangler for 100 grand. I mean, Dale. Dale, am I telling the truth or not? Pretty much.

[G]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Okay, so. So you understand we ain't apples to apples here.

[F]

Yeah, but.

[B]

But if you're buying a jeep that high, then is this thing real decked out?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, well, is it supercharged or geeked out or is it. I mean, because normally a guy that buys. Yeah, a guy that buys a hundred thousand dollar Jeep doesn't have a normal Mustang. Do this because I may give more and it sounds like I'm interested. Go to giveme the vi n givein.com. load it up and on the info, list out the geeked out stuff. Do you have an example, Turley, of our audio clip? Of what geeked out? Packages, McConaughey. So write on there all the stuff you've done so I can get a feel for it and I'll call you back and try to buy it.

[I]

Let me tell you what Melvin Post is packing right here. I've got 411 posi track, Outback 750 double pumper board over 30, 11 to 1 pop up pistons, turbojet, 390 horsepower.

[C]

Foul.

[B]

We're talking some Michael in Lake Arlington.

[E]

What's up, man?

[B]

Not much. What you got?

[E]

The lake's full.

[B]

Do what?

[E]

Lake full?

[B]

The lake is full. What are you calling for?

[E]

The lake is right here. Well, put my exact location. There might be some, you know, people we don't want to talk to every day.

[B]

But you, coach, besides being drunk.

[E]

Ain'T gonna be able to close the deal.

[B]

Oh, with his girl in the car. No, I'm with you, dude.

[E]

He.

[B]

He couldn't shoot a quail in a cage. My name is John Clay Wolf. I buy cars of the radio. Give me the vin.com. go to that website. We'll buy it. Be right back.

[D]

We'll be right back. More of the John Clay Wolf show presented by givemethevin.com coming up.

[A]

Are you t. Check in with givemethevin.com. sell us your car. We want to buy your car. And nine times out of 10, we'll pay more money than your dealer will on trade. Just load it into our website, givemethevin.com and we will come to you and pick it up and pay. Look at our reviews online. They're incredible. We've thousands of transactions. It's the Amazon.com of the car business. Give us a try.

[F]

Tell us your car. Give me the vin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[B]

Good morning everybody. Turley's computer screwed up.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

We're back.

[E]

Back.

[F]

Was that it?

[G]

How odd.

[B]

Shake a leg.

[D]

GiveMeThe Vin.com presents.

[B]

Crank it up. It's red hot.

[E]

I'm digging it.

[D]

Give me the vid. The John Clay Wolf show.

[B]

Charlie. Computer issues. Remember when I told you to buy some new computers? I think it's time to buy some new computers. 800-800-7234. And I really wanted to hear that version of ACDC. Shake a leg. Right? I'm more pissed about that than anything happen.

[G]

It's coming back.

[B]

Terry Magnolia. Good morning.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

What you got?

[E]

I got a 96F150.

[B]

Go get. No loving in that. Looks too old. How old are you? You sound like you're 28. That's a 72 year old man's truck.

[E]

Well, it was my first truck. I rebuilt it and pretty much brought.

[B]

It back to life. So. It says it has 46,000 miles, which is the only reason I took the phone call to there. And now I realize, Terry, that you're. You're lying. You're lying. It's got 46,000 miles on the new engine, right?

[E]

No, sir. Original engine.

[B]

You bought this truck new. This was your first truck and you've only got 46,000 miles on it? It's in 1996?

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

I mean, were you paralyzed for two decades? Did you go to prison? Where did it get prison?

[E]

Well, it was my first truck. Not my only truck.

[G]

So it just sat.

[B]

I mean, are you real wealthy? You got rich, grandpa. What's the deal? It doesn't make sense. To 1996, you get a new truck, 46,000 miles and you just park it.

[E]

What's that?

[B]

You heard me. I'm not. I just. I. Maybe I'm wrong and maybe I'm being wrong, but I just don't buy that.

[G]

You got a weird feeling.

[B]

An extended cab, an old dash. Just a normal truck. Two wheel drive and no count. Nobody cares about Nothing. It's got 245 on it. He's just wondering if I'm buying the Story. It's been in the museum. Turn it up, Turley.

[G]

God damn.

[E]

What are you doing?

[B]

Now, now, now. Good morning, everybody. I don't have enough coffee. I got to have some ACDC to get my damn blood flowing, cuz. DJ Prek. Whitey Blackie doesn't know the difference between large and small. He can't speak Spanish. It's Venti, you idiot.

[I]

Man, I only drink purple drink, okay? I don't drink no damn Starbucks. I don't know the damn different.

[B]

You sent DJ Prek to Chicken Express. He'll knock it out of the park.

[I]

Yeah, you want a two piece dark? I'll get that in two minutes.

[B]

Man, I need a Venti Pike.

[G]

Ah, Venti Pike.

[B]

Okay, Ross. Good morning. What city are you in? Ross, what city are you in?

[E]

Cade, Louisiana.

[B]

Cade, Louisiana. What's on your mind?

[E]

Hey, man, I was listening to your show last week, and you had a guy that worked for you, and he stole some rims off of a vehicle. He went, picked it up, it had a certain rim on it. And when he delivered it, they magically disappeared. And y' all had him on the air, and he was coming up with some BS story, and I had to get out of my car, and I didn't finish listening to what y' all said. So he's been killing me all week.

[B]

We were just busting his balls. Just busting his balls, man. It was so fun. Podcast. Okay? If you. If you did, you go to the John Clay Wolf show Facebook page and see the videos that I posted.

[E]

Oh, okay, cool.

[B]

So. So. So the before and the after and all that.

[E]

Y' all were saying, y' all were telling him if he didn't call in, you was gonna go ahead and throw him in jail. And he called in, and apparently he was listening, so he called in. B. I just wanted to know how that turned out, man. I listen to your show every Saturday. Y' all some funny sons of bitches, man.

[A]

We.

[B]

Okay, so we got the right wheels on the truck. And when the truck came through the auction block on Wednesday, buyers stopped it and said, this is it.

[G]

This is the one.

[B]

They knew that everybody listened to the story at last Saturday. They'd watch the video on the Facebook show page, and they knew. They're like, this is it. This is the truck. And I stopped. Cause I was so tied up and what? I was so jacked up in what I was doing, I just forgot. I was like, oh, my God, this is. This is the best story ever. So a driver does just what he said, picks up A car from a customer takes the truck to, like, the tire shop, swaps the rims off of our truck, my truck, onto his, and takes his rims and put them on mine. So when it checks into our recon facility, the black rims are on this truck, not the chromes. Turley's the one that caught it. And when we busted his ass, he said, no, this isn't real.

[E]

And when I was listening, the thing that killed me the most was this jackass took a picture of him and maybe his wife or something, right? Standing by the freaking vehicle with the rims on it.

[B]

Do you remember.

[G]

Do you remember the part.

[B]

Do you remember the part where he said they were taking the wheels off while we were doing it? If you look hard at the picture, you'll see shadows. I was like. So I was like, somebody behind it.

[E]

Or something on the other side of the trailer doing it? Come on, man. I was born at night, but it wasn't last night.

[B]

Actually, we have. We have the theft. We have the thief on the air. He's called in again. Good morning. Rowdy, are you there?

[E]

Hey, John, you don't need me talking about me being thief down, Bubba. Come on. I know we all good over there.

[B]

We are good over it. You gave me some of the best material I've ever had in my radio career. I think the best 30 minutes of radio I've ever had in my life was because of your goofy ass.

[E]

Hey, all this mistake. I didn't know you needed tire, too. But I tell you what, we've been looking. I've been doing your job for you down here. I've been finding some other stuff you might be missing.

[B]

Oh, yeah? Oh, oh, oh.

[E]

It's a swap shop back here by the dumpster. Hide your building. Yeah, I found three cases, brand new, unopened of those. Renew the cans of lavender spray. Automatic wall dispenser. Yeah, you know that thing you walk by? Dispenser goes off automatically.

[B]

Sure, sure, sure. Yep.

[E]

You think, oh, my God, the Copperheads got me.

[B]

What you got?

[E]

Three cases of cans of that renews just like you use your office. That was four days ago. Ever since I've been on the case, I've been sitting over here behind the car wash watching your doors and watch your logistics people coming in and out and watching your drivers coming and out. They all look okay. You know who I suspect? I think it's one of your buyers.

[B]

What?

[E]

Which one is trying to sneak out? Yeah, yeah. And I found three cases. Two of those fancy big pins like you Use three.

[B]

So you're saying that people are stealing stuff out of the office. They're putting it in the back of the building. They're coming back after work and picking it up. But you're catching all this on camera.

[E]

Clean, pristine. Daddy, I'm talking about sitting out there just waiting for somebody to come get them. And I watch those objects. Well, I fell asleep in my truck. I was up late watching Gone with the Wind.

[B]

We've got Rowdy the wheel thief.

[E]

And they don't. But I'm on the track of these criminals and I'm just here to take it. Ain't just me, it's the whole.

[B]

The whole. The whole apple cart is upset.

[E]

Yeah, I think it's the buyers. You know, I don't remember taking them wheels.

[G]

The buyers did it.

[B]

Rowdy, what do you charge an hour if you like. If we were to hire you to be our security guard, like detail.

[E]

Well, I tell you, I think I want my job back and you give me my job back. I find out what's anybody stealing from you, and I don't even have to drive cars anymore. I don't have to touch the wheels or the cars or nothing.

[B]

Okay?

[G]

Like they did in the movie catch me if you can. They had the FBI hired the bad guy. Yeah, they hired the bad guy.

[B]

Right? You bring up a good point. So one. Hey, come over Monday. I get. I get here at 8 o'. Clock. Come, let's talk about it. Let's talk about you being.

[E]

I'm gonna be your haul and oats, okay? I'm gonna be your private eye.

[B]

All right? We've got this handle, See. Out of every bad deed comes something good. You just got to keep an open mind. Thanks, Rowdy. Thanks for calling in and opening my eyes. You had to go 800-800-7 3, 4.

[C]

Do you know that guy actually tried to friend me on Facebook?

[F]

No.

[G]

After all this?

[B]

Yeah. You really? No. We haven't told the rest of the story yet.

[G]

Can we.

[B]

Yeah, we can. Michael got so mad at him a year and a half ago, Mike really flipped. You know, the old Yankee pushy freak out flip.

[G]

He's got it.

[B]

Mike's got it down. That's there, Connecticut, you know, the hard streets of Greenwich. But Mike flipped out and he like was. He was going to throw him over the rail off the second balcony. Why did you get so mad at him? What'd he do?

[C]

Because he's just lazy and didn't want to bring something upstairs. And he was started just jawing at me saying, well, that's not my job.

[B]

And I was.

[C]

When somebody starts coming at me ballistic. He came at me. So I. I just went back at him. I told him I was throw his fat ass over the rail.

[B]

Did you like grab him by the back of the head and hold him over the rail where he was looking down like Suge Knight did to Vanilla Ice and like hanging him.

[C]

It was gonna be there, but Uncle Roy and then two of the other drivers held me back from doing it.

[B]

They saved him from Turley.

[C]

God, they did.

[F]

I don't know if I'd mess with this guy Turley. I think he's got like a secret. Like a Batman identity.

[B]

Carla and Richardson, good morning. Do you think we should bring Rowdy back to be our security? Security advisor?

[E]

I couldn't comment on that. That would be risky.

[B]

I would say.06 Toyota Sasquatch with a buck and a half on the miles. 150G's leather roof. How nice is it? On a scale of 1 to 10?

[E]

I'd say it's a six or seven. It's the leather seat in the front are worn. But there's just one slight pair.

[B]

Is it you driving it? Did you put most of these miles or did someone else put them on?

[E]

I put all of them on. I'm the original owner.

[B]

Okay. So in. God. I know this is improper to ask a lady this question, so don't get mad at me.

[E]

All right. Go ahead.

[B]

What do you weigh?

[A]

Me?

[B]

Yep.

[E]

170.

[B]

Perfect. Okay, you're good. So. Because that tells me about the seats.

[G]

Oh, I see where you're going.

[B]

Yeah, you got a high mileage, older rig. She's been driving it if she's three and if she's a big one, 300. Then the seat's gonna be all blown out. We have to rebuild it.

[G]

Like where were you going with that?

[B]

Yeah, I was going. I was gonna ask her what time she gets off work today. If she ever. If she likes a nice wine and steak.

[F]

Is she six foot two? All right.

[B]

Car. I. I think it's a five thousand dollar rig. Maybe four. Four to five thousand dollars? Probably five. Yeah. Would you like to sell it?

[E]

Actually that's what carmax told me.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Well. And how long did it take you to get that number out of them versus me?

[E]

Probably about an hour longer.

[B]

Okay, well, I'm glad to hear that you just validated what we tell everybody we do. We're real. So.

[E]

So they hit it up right on the money.

[B]

Take a picture of their offer letter loaded into. Givemetheven.com I'll beat it by $200. I'll come pick it up and I'll bring you a real check, not a bank draft. They give you a bank draft. They don't give you a check. Their checks no good for eight days. My check, you can run down to the store and turn it into hundreds. I mean, into the bank.

[G]

Which we did this week.

[B]

Yeah. Actually, 27,500.

[G]

Yeah.

[B]

So, Carla, we'd love to buy it, and we'll beat him by 200. Just send me a picture of their offer letter, okay?

[E]

Okay.

[B]

Thanks, man. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. You got to bid it off of your. Is scrotum a bad word? Yes.

[G]

How about gut? How about gut?

[B]

Gut. But it's deeper than that. It hangs lower than that. Just call it your T. It goes tingle, tingle, tingle, tickle. And you just feel it, and you say what it's thinking. You just let listen. In this case, you listen to your.

[G]

To it.

[B]

And then in the other case, you're supposed to not listen to it. You go home and you do the right thing.

[F]

And then the FCC is going to kick you in it.

[B]

We'll be right back. One, two, get down. Give me the VIN.

[D]

Givemethe bin.com. and now, Senor Juan Clay Wolf.

[E]

Pay.

[B]

The calls to be the boss. What's he saying, Mom? Pay the calls to be the boss. Come go to the bathroom. Clean my ears.

[G]

What?

[B]

Huh? Q tip, tan for daddy. Clean the left.

[G]

Q tip, tie for daddy.

[F]

Clean the right.

[B]

Throw it in the trash can.

[F]

Keep the floor clean.

[B]

James Brown, everybody.

[E]

Hey, welcome.

[F]

Welcome back. I have never done that professionally in my life.

[C]

That was awesome.

[B]

That was great.

[F]

My dad's sitting down in boo saying, look what they made my boy do.

[G]

So proud of you.

[B]

800-800-Rode. My name is John Clay Wolf. This is the John Clay Wolf Show. I guess that's my name. The boss. James Brown. Bobbo is here. J.D. ryan is here. Michael Turley, the old Jew is here. No, the angry Jew. You're right. Oh, you're not Jewish.

[C]

No, not you.

[G]

Still not.

[B]

Pretty tight and angry to me.

[C]

That's the Greek side.

[B]

Yeah, Pretty, pretty, pretty. 800-800-7234 is the caller number. Yes, you can call in and give us a number on your car. Not give us a number. I'll give you a number. I'll buy your car over the radio. For those of you all who aren't aware of what we do, I have a company called givemetheven.com. you can go do that online and the site will actually bid you your car right then and there, quickly. Unlike those other stupid sites that are cheerleader sites. Talking about what they think they will pay.

[G]

Sure. Don't write checks.

[B]

We write checks all day.

[G]

Nothing in it.

[B]

All day.

[C]

We'll actually talk to you too.

[G]

Yes. Yes.

[C]

You'll actually get a person to negotiate with.

[B]

We're not robots, people.

[G]

Full of buyers.

[F]

Call. Call X phone number. Ask for Randy.

[G]

Speaking of buyers, Babu, they still saying the lights are on in your car?

[B]

I don't know if that's the baba. Your girl's down there. She, like, hanging. Is she, like, passed out with a. With a needle hanging out of her arm?

[F]

Wouldn't that be terrible?

[B]

Wouldn't be surprising. No.

[F]

Nothing like that.

[B]

What's she doing?

[F]

It would be.

[B]

We asked her to go get me coffee an hour ago. She doesn't talk anymore.

[F]

She hasn't responded. Probably asleep.

[B]

Did she. Does she need a little bit of a. What's that they. They stick in there?

[G]

EpiPen?

[B]

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. In Pulp Fiction, it's adrenaline. Does she need a little adrenaline shot to knock her straight?

[E]

Right?

[B]

I don't.

[F]

I don't think so.

[B]

Is her nose bleeding?

[F]

It's really dark and cold in here, and she just wants to read her book, but she's probably asleep.

[B]

Is her?

[F]

No. We were up really late last night.

[G]

So she's probably not listening. Can I ask, has she on probation by chance?

[E]

No.

[G]

Does she have anyone Was.

[F]

No.

[B]

Does she have an ankle bracelet? No. You sure? Yes.

[F]

Oh, yes.

[B]

The last one did. The last one you. You got out of juvie or something?

[F]

Hey, the last. Have you ever heard of plenty of fish dot com? Yeah, that's how the last one. You know, that's how that goes.

[E]

Wow.

[B]

Oh, I see. I'm so beat. Man, this. This week at the auction with the rain.

[G]

Oh, man. Does that make it better or worse? Because I would think people would then be inside because it's raining.

[B]

So they're in your getting the cars ready in the cold. Rain's okay, but the cold and rain is no good because people just don't want to come.

[G]

That makes sense. Okay.

[F]

Makes it miserable.

[B]

But at the auction this week, my.

[G]

Auction this week, what did you have? What went on the auction this week?

[B]

We had a lot of cars. Well, I know that.

[G]

What was like, the coolest car you had? Some really cool elite.

[B]

We're not always winners, but there's coolest cars we had A hundred thousand dollar Mercedes sold for 93. That was not a winner.

[G]

That's not a winner. But it's a beautiful car.

[B]

We had a Lamborghini. We broke the record again for the highest car, the highest sold price at Dallas auto auction ever in its history. And we've broken the record of the most cars sold in one day. Four times.

[G]

Four times.

[C]

Would you like to hear the audio of that actual sale?

[E]

What?

[B]

I saw that dude that, you know, the guy that posted that on Facebook was my first boss in 1991 when I was 18 years old at the Ford store.

[G]

Wait a minute. Reset this. What are we talking about here?

[B]

So there's a guy that posted a video of us selling that Lamborghini.

[G]

Okay. This week.

[B]

Yes. Ironically, he was my first boss in the business. When I. When I was 18 and I got out of high school, my brother was working at this place. He got a job with Pfizer Pharmaceuticals.

[G]

Okay.

[B]

He said. I was like, hey, can you get me a job there? He's like, you're too young. I was 18. But he asked him and they said yeah. So I went up and I worked there that summer. And this guy was my first boss.

[E]

Wow.

[B]

And I saw that.

[C]

Okay, I'm at Dallas auto auction.

[B]

Here's something you don't see every day. That's a Lamborghini 53.5. And that's a lot of money. Wow. That's my host slapper.

[G]

It was your host slap the snap. I heard it.

[B]

Yeah. That was the most expensive car ever.371,000 bucks there. Not ever. But they're ever there there. I mean, I mean an evented or Lambo. A new one. That was Muria. Muria or whatever. One of 50. That stuff's high. I mean list on it's 470 or 490 or something crazy like that.

[E]

Fun.

[G]

Have fun. Breaking records every almost.

[B]

The truth is that car lost money. Don't assume price means win. No.

[G]

Okay.

[B]

No. We love them. We buy highline cars left and right. They're just higher stakes poker chips, dude.

[G]

Yeah, I can see how you could lose.

[B]

Just cuz you put 50,000 on a bet in blackjack. Does that mean you did so good in the hand? J.D.

[G]

Wow.

[B]

But he bet 50,000. He's so smart.

[C]

What?

[B]

Doesn't always work like that. You sound like a girl when you say it. Makes me mad. Makes me want to slap you out of that chair.

[G]

Why don't you come over here and try?

[B]

Well, maybe I'm thinking about doing just because you sell something high doesn't mean you made no damn money.

[G]

I didn't know you. That's stupid.

[B]

You know, obviously you know, hey, threatened.

[G]

The door, knocked me out of my chair.

[F]

It's a kink song, genius.

[B]

What is?

[F]

No.

[B]

800.

[G]

I get it. If you lose 1% on a ten thousand dollar car or 1% on a three thousand. A three hundred thousand dollar car, it's same loss, a lot more money.

[B]

Yeah, you just say. People just assume things. Oh yeah, you're so rich because you sold an expensive car. You know, Hang on.

[C]

The touch is back again.

[G]

I hit a hot button. Yeah.

[F]

Man, I really need more coffee.

[G]

I really walked into.

[B]

I do need more coffee. Get. Get old the girl. Go give her an adrenaline shot. Somebody, please, somebody bring me some Starbucks. Now he's dying. Scott, Houston A10. I'm getting very, very. And it started with DJ Prek bringing me the wrong scruff this morning. Scott in Houston. A 10 cobalt with 33,000 miles. First of all, I'm sorry that somebody passed away in your life, cuz there's no way an 8 year old cobalt only has 33,000 miles. Unless it belonged to your dead aunt Edna. You there?

[E]

I don't. I don't actually have the Cobalt. I'm looking at one thought. Those are good cars.

[B]

Okay. Do you have like $100?

[E]

Yeah, I got 100.

[B]

All right, well, mail it to me and I'll give you free advice. 800-800-7234.

[C]

Thank you, John.

[B]

800, 800 radio.

[F]

Dear John. Dear Dr. Cods.

[B]

Oh my God.

[F]

Should I buy a Cobalt?

[G]

You called the wrong Saturday for free advice?

[C]

Dude, he just literally said he's getting.

[F]

Yeah, well, Robert, let me tell you a little something about the Chevrolet Cobalt.

[B]

Oh, it's Jack. Rush Limbaugh. I see you. I see you there, Rush. I'd like to talk to you too. I know you've got to go. Rush.

[G]

What?

[B]

Ivank at the Winter Olympics. Got him hot. Good morning, Rush. John. Yes.

[F]

Just happy, happy Saturday. God, it's a beautiful day. Just sunny. Hardly any wind at all. 71 degrees already.

[G]

Florida, not here, but yeah, not much. Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas at straight up 12 noon.

[F]

Oh, you had a little rain.

[G]

Little rain today. Yeah, in the central part of America, not out where you are.

[F]

February showers bring prescriptions for Percocets, which is a good place to be. I guess. You saw the Eastern Hemisphere coming out of our esteemed second lady in Korea at Ivanka. She's really something, isn't she? Perhaps a little on the softy squeezy liberal side, if you know what I mean.

[G]

What?

[F]

Let's be inclusive. Let's wear designer shoes. Let's tell daddy's comb over secret stuff. God, did you see that?

[B]

Yes.

[G]

She's giving away the hair.

[F]

Secret.

[G]

She's not livable.

[H]

But look.

[B]

What?

[F]

Isn't that very nearly skirting treason to give away national secrets like that for the world to digest and spread among the commies, the religious wackos out there. One day she may grow up to be responsible. Palin esque, Mama Grizzly type Palin esque. But for now, to tell the truth, I gotta tell you, I like Tiffany.

[C]

Tiffany.

[B]

Oh, you take. So if they're both in bed nude and said rush, take me. But you can only have one. One. Which one do you take? Tiffany or Ivanka?

[F]

Tiffany. First and second.

[C]

Tiffany's the. Who's Tiffany?

[F]

My God, what a. What a girl.

[B]

Ivanka's half sister.

[F]

The other Trump daughter.

[G]

I didn't know.

[B]

Marla Maple's daughter. You're a Rush. I thought you were smart.

[F]

Fine young lady.

[B]

Well, they're both attractive women, but how do you kick the big Pollock supermodel out of bed? I mean, give me a break.

[F]

She's quiet. Tiffany. And that's nice.

[G]

You like that?

[F]

And I think she looks a lot like Marla.

[B]

Marlo was better looking than Tiffany. Is he better? Is more attractive than Ivana.

[F]

She has very high cheekbones and a. A high forehead and a high mouth.

[G]

This is not sounding good.

[F]

In fact, she's got a high face. Very alluring, with or without the Percocet distortion.

[G]

You gotta high.

[F]

Generally on a Saturday. They should have put her on the red carpet at Pyongyang. And speaking. And look, speaking of the Olympics. What I gotta say, the good old USA is high in the middle count this time around. I mean, the women's hockey team won't have to buy their own drinks for about four years. And a gold medal in curling.

[G]

Curling?

[B]

Was it just me or did you see the asses on those Oriental curlers?

[F]

Good Lord, man.

[B]

The females.

[F]

That's the only reason I watch female curling. Because it's just really giant shuffleboards.

[B]

He's the accidental racist. Have you seen the guy live in.

[F]

A squat mode on the curling team?

[B]

They do.

[F]

These guys. I mean, they're a little.

[B]

Unfortunately, guys, I don't care.

[F]

Filled outside to be Olympic medalists, aren't they? They look like they've been training for a game of Monopoly, which is probably about the same combination of luck and Skill as curling. You've always got that guy. That one son of a bitch. Every time he plays, he picks up two railroads. An orange, two reds. Marvin Gardens and Park Place on a second time around the board. Lucky, lucky. Just like curling. But a win is a win, and we'll take it and hope for less athletic among us. In the current culture, maybe Super Mario Kart will soon be an official Olympic event.

[G]

No, there's a big difference.

[F]

One red mushroom away, J.D. that's all it's going to take from the Excellence in Broadcasting Network Power on loan from God.

[B]

One red mushroom away. Thomas and Rosaria. Where is Rosaria? Thomas, you there?

[E]

Yes, sir, I'm here.

[B]

Where is Rosaria? It sounds south, but it might be west. Brazoria.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

DJ Pre K. Get back.

[F]

Dj.

[B]

Listen, what grade did you graduate from?

[I]

Where did I graduate from?

[B]

No, what grade?

[I]

Oh, well, they don't call me Pre K for nothing, man.

[B]

Okay, Thomas is from Brazoria.

[I]

I heard Rosaria.

[B]

Okay, Brazoria is very different from Rosarita. Rosarita is where you get your taco shells, homeboy. Well, yeah.

[I]

Let's go get some tacos then.

[B]

Okay, Thomas. That's a good song. 17 Hyundai Elantra with 15, 000 miles. I mean, God knows your flip bad in it. I mean, you're buried so deep. What's your payoff? 20. What?

[E]

My payoff's like 23.

[B]

Yeah, you're done. I love you, man. I'm gonna hang up because it's burning too much. The long distance time that's racking up. Talking about this Hyundai, this ten thousand dollar flip, it's hurting my soul. Eight hundred. Eight hundred. Seven, two, three, four, eight. But I like you, Thomas. What do you do with it? Get a good insurance policy. You ever heard what Jewish friction is when an insurance policy meets a high payoff? Corey, Good morning in Amarillo. How are you?

[F]

Oh, God.

[E]

Good. How are you, sir?

[B]

I'm good. A 14 mega cab Cummins with 48 Lone Star. So it's cloth?

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

Four wheel drive, Cummins. 48. 14. What color?

[E]

Silver.

[B]

Average. Rougher.

[E]

Good. Got a bed liner and a fifth wheel ball in it.

[B]

But it doesn't have leather and it's expensive. And it's 36. $6,000. I think maybe 35. What are you thinking?

[E]

Are you talking about 36 for wholesale or 36 for retail?

[B]

I'm talking about me writing you a check. Call it whatever tail you want.

[E]

I was actually thinking a little higher than that. Okay, Blue. Blue book shows it at 44 clean.

[B]

On a cloth rig.

[E]

On a 2014 mega cap.

[B]

Okay, do this. Go to give me the vin. Give me the vin. I sold three. I bought and sold three of these this week. Let me check my. My results. Maybe I'm missing something, but start with go to givemetheven.com load the license plate of the VIN number in and we'll get this rolling. My name is John Claywolf. I buy cars, trucks from Brazoria, Brazoria, Midland, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Dallas, Texas, Fort Worth, Texas, Houston, Texas, San Antonio, Baton Rouge, Shreveport, hell, everywhere in between. We'll be right back.

[D]

Give me the vid.com presents the John Clay Wolf show. We'll be right back after this.

[A]

Hear us out. We beat CarMax at GiveMeTheVin.com the quicker you can get that message across in your mind, the less money we have to spend on advertising and we can even put more money in buying your cars. @givemethevin.com we are the newest. We are the biggest. We are the baddest online car buyer in the South. GiveMeTheVin.com if we don't beat your carmax off offer, will pay you $100.

[F]

Sell us your car. He doesn't dine at any of the carryout submarine shops. When he wants a sandwich, he usually hires a couple of strippers. He spends the extra money on premium quality toilet paper because the cheap stuff just won't stick to the ceiling. He's not bothered by telemarketers, distant relatives or any damn body else because he never answers his phone. He is the world's biggest son of a. Hey, man, I don't always drink beer, but when I do make mine a natty light. Tall boy. Yeah, buddy.

[D]

Want to see what these jackasses look like? Go to John Cole claywolf.com and don't forget to download the podcast the John clay wolf show. 800, 800 radio. Call in. Presented by Kimmytheven.com and we have our.

[B]

Some merch on there. They sell that T shirt in the world's biggest son of a T shirt in a coffee cup if you'd like one.

[C]

You know, this is the minute break here.

[G]

Oh, this is one minute.

[C]

So this is going to be quick, John. We went a little long that last segment.

[B]

Hi, Mike. My Name's John. Hi, Stu. 02 Lexus LX 470 with 150,000 miles on it. Stu I think is worth four to five grand, but I need to look it up and I don't have time because Charlie didn't give me a heads up that we were going into the minute super round. Are you there? What do you think it's worth? Well, you know, I'm going to give me the vin.com. i may possibly give six for it. I need to memorize which body style it is. I know it's right there on the switch. So just load it up. Let's look. Victor, a 10 GLK Formatic with a buck and a half on the miles. 155,000, right?

[E]

Right.

[B]

Five grand tops. It's a lot of miles. Grand lot of miles. A lot of miles. Cost a lot of money to keep that baby running. Yep, yep, Yep.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

Maybe four. Maybe four. Keep talking. And it goes down. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Steve. A16 Audi A6. I like this car, but I've got. I've got to think about it. I don't know it off the top of my head and I don't know if I have time to build it right now. Let me do it real quick. 16 Audi.

[E]

Where.

[B]

Where are you located?

[E]

Houston.

[B]

Never trust a guy from Houston. A6. Is it a Quattro?

[E]

Yeah. With the 3 liter engine.

[B]

It's a what? Hang on. It's an s line. Is it a premium plus?

[E]

Yep.

[B]

Or is it a. Is it a prestige?

[E]

It's got the cold weather package.

[B]

Let's do this. Okay. Here's the problem with these cars. This is why I don't know it off the top of my head. There's so many damn options, which is cool, but they really move the money needle around. And I need to know. So go to givemethevin.com. it literally takes 45 seconds to load this card. My system. Get a quote right, then do that. Then I'll have the information from you locked. I'll have the vin number. I'll have the carfax. Hopefully. I'll have a couple pictures and we'll call you right back. Try to buy it, okay?

[F]

Okay.

[B]

Thanks, man. My name is john clay wolf and I buy cars on the radio.

[D]

Back with more of the john clay wolf show after this. Presented by Give me the.

[A]

We outbid them [e-mail] and to prove it, if we don't beat your carmax offer, we'll pay you 100 bucks straight up and down. Give me the vin.com. 45 seconds, load your car in, get an offer. We'll come to your doorstep and pay you right there or pay off your payoff if we don't beat your carmax. Offer. We pay you $100. Look at our reviews online. Google givemetheven.com and see it for yourself. It's awesome.

[D]

Go ahead and crack that natty light.

[B]

Right. Because it's morning.

[D]

That makes sense. The John Clay Wolf show, presented by GimmeThevent.com 800800 radio givemethevent.com if you do.

[B]

Crack that natty light, I've got a story. Jody and I know that you're an alcoholic and you're recovered and you've got all these wooden nickels in your pocket and they're not like throwing them at people and making them feel guilty.

[G]

They're chips.

[B]

And I do have, I've been. Have I. After our auction day is Wednesday.

[G]

Yes.

[B]

And it's very high stress getting to it. Is high stress going through it. And I've gotten in this habit of after the sale, that's my Friday. Sure, that's the end. But I, I had too many beers last Wednesday.

[G]

Oh, after the big auction you had too many beers.

[B]

Yeah. And it was late, man. I just relaxed you.

[G]

Do you kick back?

[B]

And where I live, I need to be careful with this story.

[G]

You're called.

[B]

But, but here, here's, here's the moral of the story. Okay.

[G]

There's a moral.

[B]

The new cans of Miller Light that came out the of few years ago that are 16 or 18 ounces and they have twist off tops like Mickey's big mouth. They stay real cold.

[G]

Okay.

[B]

And they have a larger, twice the size on the top.

[G]

Regular big mouth.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And I got to quit them.

[E]

Why?

[B]

I. I got them. I did quit them.

[G]

I don't know how to quit.

[B]

I quit them. Remember when I was bitching saying I wanted to sue yeti? Yes. They were getting the beer too cold. I'm adding Miller Light to the lawsuit. Yeah. It's a Yeti. Miller like combo. It's too much.

[G]

Get more money.

[B]

It's just too much.

[C]

Too much beer at one time.

[B]

Yeah. And you don't feel it and you don't know what's happening. And then you're like, oh my God, I'm wasted.

[F]

You'll probably get a lot better at this. Just to add some counterpoint to JD's point of view, keep in mind, I.

[G]

Don'T even have a point.

[F]

Winners never quit. Oh, jeez.

[B]

Okay.

[F]

And, and quitters never, never win.

[B]

Yeah, but see, like I've been drinking Miller's Light for years in the bottle form in the small top. And you know how to pace yourself. You know how your body's I don't like getting drunk because you lose. Nobody respects a guy that's a sloppy drunk. No, I'll drink some beers and everybody's like, I never see you get drunk. You never really get drunk. I'm like, you know, because you just know where you're at.

[G]

You can pay for it.

[B]

But with that product, I cannot manage my alcohol.

[G]

Well, there it is. Pull that clip. Please.

[F]

Show some appreciation. It's like your daddy got you a horse and you're like, I wanted a pony.

[B]

I'm telling you.

[G]

Maybe just.

[B]

I quit him. I quit him. I quit him about four months ago. And then when I was. I went to. I went to a dinner the other night. I stopped by to get some stuff and I saw those, that deal a nine pack of those big mouth deals. I'm like, I hadn't had these in a long time. No big deal. I. I've gotten control of myself. Okay, there you go. I can handle it now because I quit them a while back and I sat there and had a few beers and I got sloppy ass. I mean, hurt myself. And I'm getting older. I'm not snapping back like I used to. This is a true, true, true statement. You can't take enough BC powders the next morning to get square.

[G]

No, you can. You're right.

[B]

No.

[G]

So. So you don't have a problem with alcohol. Why don't you just limit yourself to X number?

[B]

No, I will, I'll be glad to. I just didn't realize you didn't know.

[G]

What the number was yet.

[B]

I know what the number is and I know how to do it. I just. With that particular container, it is like beer bonging in high school.

[G]

It is the beer's fault.

[B]

It is the beer's fault. And they need to put a disclaimer on the product warning. This is very cold and very good and goes down very fast and you will get S faced before you know it. So watch out again.

[G]

There we go.

[E]

Pop.

[B]

A top is good.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Twist. A top on a big top is bad. And if you're in the beer. So I. I said this to a friend of mine and you know what he said? What are you talking about? Those, those bigger cans, they're like, they stay real cold and they got the. He said, I had to quit them. And I'm like, you too? He says, yeah, man, I was getting wasted and he said, I talked to buddy mine and he had to quit him too. So this is not just me.

[F]

Class action law.

[B]

Class action lawsuit.

[F]

Thank God I can't hear it.

[G]

Pennsylvania one is we admitted we were powerless over alcohol.

[B]

It'd be like my, my fifth grader rolling around with a freezer in his room with putting a freezer full of ice cream in his room.

[G]

Makes sense. Makes sense.

[F]

Hey, Pete, did you hear about junk Clay Wolf?

[B]

What about him?

[F]

He's swearing off with the Miller lights because he says they're giving them harm. He must be like, wicked queer, huh?

[B]

I don't drink, you know, hard liquor. I, I, I pace myself, but I cannot, I cannot handle this.

[G]

Okay?

[B]

Very odd.

[G]

You just buy the different kinds of.

[B]

I will. So my commitment to, to sobering up is changing bottles.

[G]

Daddy's so proud of you.

[F]

Why don't you try shiner bach man? At $9 a six pack, you'll slow down.

[B]

Yeah, well, but then you'll have to buy all new clothes. So damn fat, right? And I can tell you, when the cop asked me, what are you doing? I was like, I'm sitting here in this parking lot talking on the phone. He's like, what's, where's your phone? I'm like, it's right here. It's Bluetooth. Why are your pants unzipped? I said, because I'm fat. What do you think I'm doing sitting here like, loping my mule? I was just sitting there having a few beers, talking on the phone, but I realized when I start talking to him like, oh, my God, I'm hammering.

[G]

Do you understand you can get a DUI even if your cars in the parking lot?

[B]

Do you understand that? In a keyless world environment, yes. If your key is not in the ignition and the car is not running, you're all right.

[G]

Good luck with that.

[B]

I had good luck with it. He was a very good guy. He was very understanding and, but it was a, it was an eye opening moment. It's eye opening moment. Keep it at the house, guys. I didn't have any real problem, but it could have been a problem.

[F]

Amen.

[B]

Scared the hell out of me, to tell you the truth.

[H]

All right.

[B]

My name is John Clay Wolf, and I'm, I'm figuring out how to drink beer. He's 45 years old.

[D]

GiveMeThe Vin.com presents the John Clay Wolf show. We'll be right back after this.

[A]

Are you tired of getting beat by the dealership? Check in with givemethevin.com, sell us your car. We want to buy your car, and nine times out of ten, we'll pay more money than your dealer will on trade. Just load it into our website, givemethevin.com and we will come to you and pick it up and pay. Look at our reviews online. They're incredible. We've done tens of thousands of transactions. It's the Amazon.com of the car business. Give us a try.

[F]

Sell us your car.

[D]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemethevin.com.

[B]

10:45, Saturday morning. My name is John Clay Wolf. Welcome to the program. We've been going since eight. The podcast is on itunes or John Clay Wolf show. And you can just click podcast, pull it down. Commercial. Free music, free. So it takes four hours a show and cranks it down to about two and a half.

[G]

And if by chance the station you're listening on leaves us at 11 o', clock, it still is streaming on our website.

[B]

Yes. And if you add the. Yeah, our website is what?

[G]

John Clay Wolf.

[B]

And what do you push?

[F]

Calm.

[G]

Right at the very top. Just click the streaming button.

[B]

Cool, cool, cool. Who's this? Where are we getting our beer from? Eric Killeen, Texas. Good morning.

[E]

Hey, John. How you doing, man?

[B]

I'm good.

[E]

Hey, so I listen to you every Saturday when I'm at work. No, I'm not telling you where I work because that's not important.

[B]

Okay, but hang on, let me stop you right there. You're in Colleen. So you've only been listening to us for four Saturdays. Because I just started in Colleen, didn't we?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

All right, well, but now it's every. And I like to hear that we've got a real guy. Okay, keep going back to it.

[E]

Dude, obviously you are not a professional alcoholic. Okay?

[B]

Okay.

[E]

Since you can't handle these bottles of Miller, like. So the reason I called you is you tell me where you're getting them from and I'll go get them and take care of them for you.

[B]

Dude, do you know what I'm talking about? Because they will creep up on you. They're creepy. It's like creepy weed.

[E]

Yeah, I know what you're talking about. I mean, I. I prefer a long neck like myself, but, you know, I do, too.

[B]

I do, too. But I heard that you know what you can drink, you know how to do it. You know how your body processes it. And you get those creepers, man, and they'll get you, like, hallucinating and you wouldn't know what happened. So be careful. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. My name is John Clay Wolf. On my right is Sir J.D. ryan. He's famous, by the way. Yeah, Bobbo My own house, Bobbo. Hi, everybody. Bob has a lot of the funny voices of the show. And Turley is our producer. Turley's been with us seven years.

[G]

Forever.

[C]

2010. That's eight.

[G]

Eight years.

[B]

Bobo's been with us 10 years.

[E]

Right.

[F]

At 10 years.

[B]

Yep. Shady's been with us 12.

[C]

2012, right?

[G]

Yeah, about like that.

[F]

Since 1985, baby.

[G]

11. God, you remember more than my career than I do.

[B]

You're my hero, D. He's famous. I told you he's famous. We do. I. We aim to entertain Saturday mornings. But we also have this little wiggle in us where I buy your car. If you want to call in, call in with the nice ones. If you call in with a junker, I'm going to make fun of you. Not. We don't buy junk cars. Because we do. But we've got to keep the show entertaining. In a 96 tourist with 120,000 miles is not very entertaining. But a 2014 Vet ZL1 with blah, blah, blah, or a Lamborghini or a cool diesel truck, those are entertaining. And I love it when people call into the show and they actually want to sell. And we negotiate in the realistic.

[G]

Sure.

[B]

And we negotiate and do an actual transaction. That's what the listeners want to hear. They don't want to hear a bunch.

[G]

Of damn bids earlier about the really very expensive car you sold last week at the auction. What was it again?

[B]

Was a 17 Lamborghini Aventador.

[G]

And you bought it for. Sold. Excuse me.

[B]

We sold it for 371,000.

[G]

Okay. And then you yelled it me because I said great, and you said, maybe not great. Maybe we lost money. So if you lost money, why would you sell it?

[B]

Because I sell them all.

[G]

You sell them all even if you're losing money?

[B]

Absolutely. Really? Oh, my God. That's the whole deal, man. That's what makes us fun. We buy them all and we sell them all. It's live ammo. It's the bullets can go any direction. It may kill me. It may kill them. It may hurt no one. You never know what's going to happen, but something's going to happen. It's a show, okay?

[G]

The average person thinks if you go to an auction that you're the person selling is going to make money. They don't sell it?

[B]

No. Well, yeah. No, that's the average person.

[G]

Average person.

[B]

That's what Bob calls sharecroppers. What's sharecropper? 10 acres and a mule.

[E]

Right.

[B]

We're industrial farmers.

[G]

So you move everything yeah, no, we.

[B]

We move it all and we sell it. Not all, but God, almost every one of them. 93.7% on the first pass. And it hurts like hell sometimes. So just because you see me. And so the guy that got the Lamborghini sold to me. Yeah, He. He's the one who made the money.

[G]

Okay.

[B]

I lost the money.

[G]

Ah. Okay. I just. Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

I'm just a novice. I don't go to that every week.

[C]

So to open the page, just open the book up a little bit more, too. So behind the scenes. So the buyers, the managers that buy the vehicle, when they're running, we're watching the auction, okay? And we know it's going to sell. And you're praying like, no, it's like 10 grand, you know? And you got.

[B]

Because these guys are on 10, the percentage of the high, low of the bring, profit or loss, all of them. So when these cars lose, the managers lose, and when they win, the managers win. So they're sitting back at the office watching this show on tv.

[G]

Well, gathered around the computer like a football game. Now I know there's a percentage, okay?

[C]

You hear some cussing every once in a while.

[G]

I just thought y' all were interested in the auction. Oh, no. Money on the line.

[B]

Absolutely. Absolutely. I gotcha. Okay. Isn't it more fun to watch football when you've bet on it?

[G]

Absolutely.

[B]

It is.

[F]

Blood sport.

[B]

800, 800. 7, 2, 3, 4.

[C]

Speaking of betting on sports, speaking of.

[B]

Olympics, you know, we have our own correspondent now.

[G]

What?

[B]

I don't know much about him. Turley, it's Connor Johnson.

[C]

Yes, Connor. We sent Connor Johnson for the John Clay Wolf Show. Somebody's got to go to.

[B]

I've been so busy. I didn't do it. Totally. Settle this up.

[C]

Okay, Set them up. Got an ISDN line set up and everything, because it's huge.

[E]

Huge.

[B]

Curling.

[C]

We've won the United States of America. Won a gold medal in curling.

[B]

Everything.

[G]

Yes, it's fun to watch. It really is. So who's.

[B]

Have you seen the asses on those Oriental curling trips?

[C]

There's a Russian girl, too.

[B]

Curler. Oh, my God.

[E]

Think about it.

[B]

They stand in a squat all their life, so all they are is butt muscle. Yeah, it's a walnut cracker is what it is. All right.

[C]

Nice to see him. I pulled Connor up. You there, Connor.

[F]

Hi, everybody. Connor Johnson coming to you from Olympics North Korea.

[B]

This is Connor.

[F]

Oh, sorry. This is Sal Turley.

[B]

Did you pick him up over there?

[C]

South Korea? No, he's an American. His name's Connor Johnson?

[B]

I thought you know.

[F]

Okay, no, I'm from Aberine.

[B]

Abilene, Texas. Okay.

[F]

Abilene, Texas.

[B]

I don't think so.

[F]

Gonna tell you this Olympics stupid. Everybody hate Olympics. And the Asian people you ask why?

[C]

Why?

[F]

Because they have a Korea. Everybody hate Korea.

[G]

Oh, Korea.

[F]

I tell you what bad and good about Korea.

[B]

Tell us.

[F]

Korean man, great businessman, great business, always make money.

[G]

That's the good part.

[F]

Even if no rides on in the store cash register, no work. That's why never spend business. Also price too high.

[E]

What?

[F]

Drive up market for cheap smokes and mad dog horses. What does this have to do. Why so high?

[G]

Why are we at the Olympics?

[F]

Too much money.

[H]

He cheat.

[B]

He's lost me. What the hell are we talking about?

[F]

Also make two good friends with dictator dictator rookie. Korea, North Korea, Kim Jong Un. Yeah, Rook, like if Chinese dictator have his own mini me.

[G]

It does kind of look like mini me.

[F]

Also, and I tell you from personal experience, they treat women like animals.

[G]

Yeah, it's bad.

[F]

Only good for cook and cream to make the babies.

[H]

That's so wrong.

[F]

Also good can pourish wood furniture, make it shine. And then worst thing about Korean, try to steal all the recipes every time you eat Chinese food. Every recipe. What everybody favorite what? Broccoli, beef, sweet sour egg, foo young. Korean try to steal. That's all Taiwan food. Only original recipe Korean ever come up with is Kung Pao. And I know where to eat Kung Pao. Okay, you know why?

[B]

Why?

[F]

Because I'm a dog lover. You're a dog lover because will you eat your friend? No. Especially not Kung Pao.

[G]

You know anything about your peanuts and.

[F]

Water chestnuts and celery? Fine for you. Korean's no good. Don't watch Olympics.

[G]

Don't watch the Olympics.

[F]

Don't encourage Korea.

[G]

Okay, never mind.

[F]

Everybody in Aberine behind me on this.

[G]

So what? Abilene.

[B]

Abilene. For those of y' all who don't know where Abilene is, look it up on the map. And anyone who doesn't want to call into the show to sell us your car, just go to givemetheven.com and that's.

[F]

The important part, right? From Pyongyang, this is Connor Johnson signing off.

[B]

Thank God.

[C]

He didn't really give us much. Update on the.

[B]

Hey, strip club dj, if you're still down there in the south moving around, you're supposed to pick up that 350, that Mustang GT. 350. The R. The R version. That's a really high demand car. And call me and let me know if you've got possession of it because we bought it the other day.

[C]

He's going to pick it up, right?

[B]

Well, he said he one of his people are. It's like what people?

[C]

Wait, he's got his own people?

[B]

He's got his own people. And I wrote it. I was like hang on. Who are your people that are driving my cars? And do we have their driver's license and driving records?

[F]

So is he going to send a fighter thief for a magic user?

[B]

Strip club is a. Is a reny. So he has some different kind of people. That's crazy. But see I. I want to know if we have that car. Cuz that. And then I've got a Dodge Demon also. That should be here. So those two cars together, cuz they're kind of real special. Hot rod. It's springtime. Tax season's out. The money's come up. Cars are bringing more. There's no question. Speaking of spring, Steven Spring in Oo Tacoma with 133 extended cab. Are you you there?

[E]

I am here. How you doing today?

[B]

Average rough or clean on this rig?

[E]

Average.

[B]

Two wheel drive, extended cab. Four cylinder or six?

[E]

Four cylinder, 2.7.

[B]

Does five grand put it to bed?

[E]

I'm sorry?

[B]

Does 5,000 put it to bed? It should.

[E]

That's exactly what I got offered the other day.

[B]

Isn't that amazing? And how long did it take you to get that offer?

[E]

You know what I drive. I bought it brand new back then. Probably the past 10 years. I get it out. You know, it doesn't have many miles for an 18 year old. But I get off.

[B]

So does five grand buy it?

[E]

You know, a couple years ago I got an option 75 at right around 100. But.

[B]

Does 5 grand buy it?

[E]

Do any better?

[B]

Oh, I'd hate to price another man's property.

[E]

I heard that.

[B]

Do this, do this, do this. I don't think. I mean, I'll come pick it up, I'll bring you a check and it's over. And the good news about not selling it yourself is you're not going to get stabbed or killed.

[E]

This is true. I hate posting stuff online. I mean, you never know.

[B]

Does five grand buy the car?

[E]

Let me talk about it with my wife.

[B]

Hang on, hang on. Let me. DJ Prek, can you get my wife on the phone? We. We. We're bringing the wives into the deal. If we're bringing the wives in the deal, I'm bringing mine into the deal too. Because you know how those women are. She may straighten me out quick. She's gonna ask me a lot of questions about what I'm thinking and why I think it's okay to spend 5,000 on that and when she wants to buy this. And I said no the other day. And why are we buying an 18 year old Tacoma with 130 on it for five grand? I mean, Steve, are you sure sure we want to bring the wives into this conversation?

[E]

Probably not. Probably wouldn't be a good idea, would it?

[F]

Damn right, Steve.

[B]

Okay, I'm gonna give you 5100. And the hundred is just to keep the wives quiet.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, man.

[C]

Come on.

[B]

Go Steve, go. Do it.

[F]

Go Steve, go.

[B]

Go Steve, go. You can do it.

[E]

Give me 10 minutes, man.

[B]

I'll call you.

[E]

You guys open all day?

[B]

Yeah, just go to give me the vin.com. we'll be there 24 hours a day. You can do it. Holy hell.

[G]

Yeah.

[B]

Be right back. My name is John Clen. I buy cars on the radio. Oh, yeah.

[F]

We're back.

[D]

Back to the john clay wolf show. Call in 800-800-roke love listening to y'.

[E]

All.

[D]

Presented by givemetheven.com.

[B]

Is he still alive?

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Yes.

[G]

Yes, very much.

[B]

Even on tour, is he still like fathering new children? Probably.

[G]

I don't remember the last time he popped one out.

[B]

I think he has a lot.

[F]

If you were Rob Stewart, would you.

[C]

His daughter's hot.

[G]

Oh, God. That's why I.

[B]

So was. Was Ivanka at the Olympics? Was Conor for real?

[C]

She was really there.

[B]

What she doing?

[C]

She was making appearances. So the cool events. She was at the Big Air.

[F]

Which is.

[C]

Which is where they go down 10 stories on a snowboard. Go up in the air.

[G]

Oh, that one.

[C]

Insane.

[G]

Yeah.

[C]

And then she went to the curling championship because the Americans were there.

[B]

It's cool.

[C]

Yes, because it's all of a sudden. Seriously, isn't that weird? This sport is going to be the biggest thing since. What is that Cornhole.

[G]

My son's taking.

[B]

Good morning. He's taking classes.

[G]

They going in Dallas.

[E]

J.D.

[B]

Your son is taking classes?

[G]

Hurling classes. They have them in Dallas. At the Dallas Star Center.

[B]

In Dallas, isn't it called horseshoes and it's shuffleboards.

[F]

Something about the name of that game cornhole just makes me nervous.

[B]

Hi, Bobo.

[F]

Cuz it's always a hillbilly wants you to play Cornhole.

[B]

Well, this.

[C]

That's what curling is. It's a hillbilly sport up north.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And they just kind of Olympic sport.

[B]

It's Eskimo cornholing.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Pretty.

[C]

I mean it's stuff. It's shuffleboard on iceboard.

[G]

Yeah, it really is kind of shuffleboard.

[C]

But you have to have that touch like in cornhole or horseshoes or washing.

[B]

With the sweeping in front. Does it really make that big a difference?

[G]

Sure.

[B]

Actually, yeah.

[G]

And those are 300 brooms. Guess how I know. My son's having to buy one.

[C]

You're kidding.

[G]

Those are 300.

[C]

There's gonna be.

[B]

I was gonna get a trombone, but instead I was wondering if you could loan me. I've got a hundred saved up, but could you load me 200? I'll pay you back soon. For a cornhole in brooms?

[G]

I make the Olympics in four years.

[B]

I'll pay you back there.

[C]

I'm telling you this. Schools are gonna start this.

[B]

Well, how the hell could they start it when there's no ice? Yeah. All you got to do is go to a rink.

[G]

There are rinks everywhere. There are rinks everywhere.

[C]

Hockey's in Texas. You go to a high.

[B]

I mean, Underwater Basket Weaving 101. Who wouldn't sign up for that? And then to get to see all the girls in yoga pants bent over for two hours.

[E]

All the way.

[G]

Been over. I mean.

[B]

I know. I mean all the way.

[C]

I'd play it if you had beer while you're playing it.

[G]

And the guys in Dallas.

[B]

A whole new version of cornhole to.

[G]

Celebrate with the beer.

[C]

Do they really.

[G]

Oh, yes.

[C]

I'm talking about playing with it while you're drinking.

[B]

I was going to play with it too. Who said anything about not playing with it? All right, 800, 800. Seven, two, three, four.

[F]

Anybody says they don't lie.

[B]

Two kinds of liars this world, boy. Those who said they quit and those who said they never started. Good morning. You're on the air. Who's this is James. James, what you got?

[E]

So 2004 Ford F150. See, it's the STX. Like the little single extended. It's not extended cab. It's got that little.

[B]

It's a regular cab with a window behind it.

[E]

Correct.

[B]

But it could.

[E]

You can still open it.

[B]

Okay. You could like fit Randy the Chipmunk in there.

[E]

Yeah. So my little toolbox. Something like that. 134,000 miles.

[B]

Six or eight cylinder, probably 6.4.6 L V8. Okay. Two wheel drive. RE4.

[E]

Two wheel drive, rubber floor mats. You know, it's like a fleet truck.

[B]

Average R for clean.

[E]

Average.

[B]

What year?

[E]

2004. It's when they switched over 2500. No, 25.

[B]

130. What? On the miles.

[E]

134.

[B]

Yeah. I'll give a quarter for it if it's straight and I don't have to do anything to it. Quarters. 2500 in. In a. In the drug slang.

[E]

27. And pick it up today or Monday.

[B]

No, I'll do 20. Where. Where do you live?

[E]

And humble. Right here outside of.

[B]

I'll do 27 and you bring it to me in Fort Worth.

[E]

You know what? We're going to the Astros opener up there. Well, the Rangers opener. I might just put on a trailer.

[B]

That's fine. Take it up because it's Gonna cost me 200 to get it out of there. Yep.

[E]

Okay. I'll put it that.

[B]

Thanks, man. 8008-007278-00800 radio. Speaking of a truck out in the middle of nowhere. Oh, seven Dodge, three quarter ton in the middle of nowhere, far away from the Dallas Fort Worth market. They love us because we bring the dfw, the Dallas market to them, which is. But I still have to go get them, which is. And in Midland. That ain't down the street. That's down the highway. Scott, good morning. You're on the air.

[E]

The truck's in Whitney.

[B]

Good. That's closer. That's only an hour away.

[E]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Exactly. Did you ever race motocross at the Whitney MX park?

[E]

No, but I'm about eight, nine miles from it.

[B]

I love that place. 07 Dodge. So is it a five, nine or the other one?

[E]

It's a good one. The five, nine.

[B]

It's probably. It's 07 Charlie. We had a 200, 000 mile one this week. It was at eight grand.

[I]

Yes.

[C]

85.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Eight grand, Scott.

[E]

I can't do that.

[B]

It's just got too many miles on it. I mean, unless it's lifted and pretty and badass. Is it?

[E]

No, it's not.

[B]

Yeah, it's just eight grand rig. Click. I can't help it. I get it. This. This grass smoking diesel market that all the Oklahomans started, and it's like, made its way down to Texas. The, The. The marijuana cloud of smoke that made it down to Texas. That 200, 000 mile diesels are worth 20, 000. Yeah, they're not.

[G]

They're not.

[B]

Y' all might trade them amongst each other for that. I'll give you 21 for yours. You can give me 19. 8,000 for money. Yeah. I just sold mine for 21. No, you traded it to some other crackhead that had 200,000 on his. And y' all just did a Dumb. A goofy. You paper. Swap.

[E]

Swap.

[B]

Yeah, they are worth money, but not.

[G]

Not that kind of money.

[B]

No, no, no. What you got in the. You look like you're grabbing something like you want to.

[G]

All kinds of fun news this week, by the way. Finally, what happens in Vegas can't actually stay in Vegas. Tourists catching a flight out of Sin City. Are you ready for this? Can now dump their leftover legal dope in metal containers at the airport. Ten green bins dubbed amnesty boxes.

[B]

And there will be a shotgun driver with a big box trailer at the airport with 220,000 miles on it in Oklahoma plates. Ready to load it up and run it right back to his hometown.

[G]

The 10 green bins dubbed amnesty boxes prevent federal transportation agents from finding Potter.

[B]

No, it's not illegal for us. We are part of the tribe during the security screenings.

[G]

By the way, in a related story, applications for janitors at the Vegas airport have a three year waiting list now.

[B]

No kidding.

[G]

All right, let's see what else. Texas governor Greg Abbott on Thursday spared the life of a convicted. This never happens. He actually spared the life of a convicted killer. Shortly before the man's execution, he said, nope, this guy is not going to be killed. Thomas Bart Whitaker's father, Kent, this guy tried to kill his dad. And his dad's not saying we don't want him to go to the death penalty.

[B]

He said his dad must have done something really bad.

[G]

I'm telling you, he said he was.

[B]

What does dad do? No, his dad did. So why did he want to kill him?

[G]

He actually, on a darker side, he killed his mother and tried to kill his dad. So anyway, but, and he said, so.

[B]

The dad didn't like him. He feels indebted.

[G]

Bart said he found God in prison and has learned to honor his father.

[B]

Twenty years, he finally did what I told him to do.

[G]

He found God in prison and they learned to honor his father and mother, you know, after he tried to kill him.

[B]

You're a bad person, JD Bringing up stuff like that. That I don't know. Demetrius asking about a Corvette found in storage. What about a Corvette found in storage? First of all, what city are you in?

[E]

I'm in humble.

[B]

Humble. And is this your Corvette?

[E]

No, it wasn't mine. I read about it on the news. These, these people, you know, they bought an abandoned storage locker from an auction or inside the storage lock. Inside the storage locker was a 2009 Corvette Z06 with 706 miles on it. It's like no title.

[B]

It's like a $40,000 $35, 000 car. $40,000 car.

[E]

Okay. Now would you buy it without a title?

[B]

No, you got to get a title. I mean it. But all you have to do is pop the VIN number and look up the registration. See? Owns it.

[E]

Okay, well, they did all that. It wasn't filling at a clean car back.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Let me, let me. I'm not. Not trying to be sarcastic and cut you off, but it's factual stuff. So this car came out of General Motors and it got sold at a dealership. So when it got sold, it got punched to a person. That VIN number goes with that registration. And there's ways to figure it out. That car is owned by someone. So we got to find the owner and have them fill out paperwork to get a title because they. If they're dead, then they have heirs. You can follow the trail on the airship papers. Somebody owns it.

[E]

Their cars in.

[B]

Somebody owns it's what I'm saying. However, if it was left in the storage deal, but there's more and the storage company put mechanics liens on it and they sold it at auction without a title. Can you do that? Yes. So now you own a car without a title, but you can't. You have to sell it without a title on a bill of sale. So there's a bill of sale transaction, but you can't get the damn thing registered. So now you got to prove ownership. And then you go to the the DMV and they create a new VIN number and it's a reassigned vin and it cuts the value down to nothing. I mean it really screws it up. But. Can you finish that job? Yeah.

[E]

Okay. Just wondering. I thought you first can ask about it.

[B]

Well, I hope you got the answer.

[C]

Knowledge bomb.

[B]

That was a knowledge bomb.

[E]

Serious.

[B]

Oh, sounds like pearl necklace.

[F]

Yes, our buddy ran.

[G]

He make it back from. Make it back from Mardi Gras. He was here earlier. I don't know if he's still in the green room. Is he running around?

[B]

He's just an alcoholic, drug addicted piece of.

[G]

He wasn't before he went to Mardi Gras this year. He used to be chipping. Were any of them smart? No, but it's just that Mardi Gras.

[F]

Will ruin some people, man.

[G]

Apparently it did and screwed him up.

[B]

Well, well, well. We've got a lot of callers. I just don't. I don't know what to do. Okay. Can we help you? Chris Woodlands. 08 Ultima SE 120 leather, no roof, two grand 2500.

[E]

All right.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I appreciate it.

[B]

And that wasn't that fun. I mean that was so exciting to bid an120,000 mile 10 year old Altima. You never see those.

[G]

It never happens.

[B]

No, I mean this is really rare stuff. Lean in tight. Here's another one that's just so exciting. 08 Tacoma, another Toyota with 150, 000 miles and it's a two wheel drive. Go figure. Corey in Houston.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

We buy them all the time. It's just not fun for radio.

[E]

I know.

[B]

So does six grand buy it?

[E]

Big grand? I don't know.

[B]

What do you know?

[E]

It runs. It runs better than a six grand truck.

[B]

Okay, on a scale of one to ten, how nice is it?

[E]

On a scale of one to ten? Outside being a, I'd say an eight. I mean it doesn't have a clean carfax. I bought it.

[B]

Doesn't matter. Does it have flood or does it flood or salvage?

[E]

No, it doesn't have a salvage title. He didn't want it anymore. And I work at a body shop, so I bought it cash off of him. Did a bill of sale, put it back together, painted it.

[B]

Put it back together, Put it back together. All I heard and everything you just said was put it back together. So that's fine.

[E]

See, that's why I almost don't want to sell it. Because I mean, it's a running.

[B]

You've got nothing in it. You gave him, you gave him 1500 for it and then you built it, right?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, so. But what, what when you say put it back together, was it like wrecked bad or was it just apart?

[E]

Someone pulled out in front of him and they. It. I mean it, it took a hit on the front, right? But nothing cut. Didn't even touch the impact bar. Nothing on the frame or anything. Just I mean, radiator support.

[B]

So if I gave you six grand, counting the time you put in it, do you make 2500?

[E]

No, I'd probably. I got. I'd probably need about seven, five or somewhere between there.

[B]

I may buy the truck. It all depends on the eyeball. Here's the deal. The Mexicans. And this is not racist. I can talk about foreign affairs without being labeled a racist, I hope.

[E]

I'll tell you the reason I decided to buy this truck because we had four body men at the time. And my dad was like, you want to see if this is a good truck to buy? And I was like, all right, let's go. So he got all four of them out There. And he was like, what do you think? And he was like, cash money today. And all of them raised their hand.

[B]

They like them, they like them, they like them.

[E]

I still got them. Hit me up all the time. When you gonna sell it, man? It's too good a truck to drive every day, man. I can't do it.

[B]

Well, they're going to. Most of them are going to want. See, I sell to the Mexican car dealers and then they sell to those guys and they take two grand down into do the payments. So that's just the beehive. That's the pecking order. You know, that's the food chain. I think it's. I think you're close. We're all close. We're all over it. Just if you want to sell it, go to givemetheven.com and load it up and we'll take a look and give you a hard offer if you want to sell it. But it sounds like. And I'm not trying to bust your balls, but it sounds like if we offer you what you want, then right then you've just found validation that you were right and you're just going to get.

[E]

Keep it possibly.

[B]

See, so don't go to my way. Don't, don't, don't. Go, go, go, go, go. Go somewhere else and. And get validation somewhere else. Come to us when you're ready to sell it.

[E]

I got you.

[B]

We love you. We love you, and we're glad you're calling, but I don't want to waste our time talking about stuff that ain't real. It's like I wouldn't. You wouldn't want me coming by your body shop and work up a big old quote on a car that I have not, no intention of letting you fix.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

All right, man. Thanks.

[G]

There you go.

[B]

800. 800. 7234. My name is John clay wolf, and I buy cars and radio.

[D]

We'll be right back. More of the John Clay wolf show presented by givemethevin.com coming up.

[A]

We outbid them [e-mail] and to prove it, if we don't beat your carmax offer, we'll pay you 100 bucks straight up and down. Give me the vin.com 45 seconds. Load your car in, get an offer. We'll come to your doorstep and pay you right there or pay off your payoff. If we don't beat your carmax offer, we pay you $100. Look at our reviews online. Google givemethevin.com and see it for yourself. It's awesome.

[F]

Sell us your car. Givemethevin.com so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[B]

It's a hard living. Tail kicking.

[D]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemetheven.com have y' all heard?

[B]

Devil Goes to Georgia on the Dallas classic rock station? Yeah, twice.

[G]

Yeah. Charlie Dennis.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

Yep. The original version from the 80s, classic.

[B]

Country and classic rock.

[F]

You know, CDB was a classic rock band for a long time. A lot of people don't realize they were really hip, hip guys. Uneasy Rider, you know, Charlie, Daniel.

[G]

Yep.

[F]

South's going to do it again.

[G]

When I was music director.

[B]

That's right. That was.

[G]

They pitched.

[F]

That's southern rock and roll. Allman Brothers, you know, Molly Hatchet with. With a fiddle. Marshall T. Can't you see?

[B]

Can't you see where this woman has gone to me? Gerald. New Orleans, good morning. Gerald, you there?

[E]

Hey, buddy.

[B]

Hey, man. Sorry to leave you on hold so long. I was hoping these 17 trucks, they're not bringing what people think they would bring. That's why I hadn't taken your call because I was hoping you put it into the system and let the system bid it so then you could cuss at the computer strain. Not me.

[C]

What truck is it?

[B]

He's got a 17 GMC diesel. Great truck. Don't get me wrong. 16,000 mile, four wheel drive, crew cab, leather navigation. What color is it?

[E]

White. This is E71 4x4.

[B]

So it's all good? Everything's good. It's just when GM did that cheap financing on these at the end of the year and they did all that discounted rebate, it really busted the market back on them. What are you gonna get?

[E]

What am I gonna get? Buy another house, that's all. I own a mechanic shop. I have cars everywhere. It's not a big deal.

[B]

Okay. Double cab. What the hell am I doing wrong here? It's not a double cab. Is it a big back door or the small back door?

[E]

Oh, it's a big one. Screw.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Does it have a sunroof?

[E]

No.

[B]

Is it a SLT or a Denali slt? Okay. Any body work done on it?

[E]

No.

[F]

Okay.

[B]

When I heard mechanic shop, I was thinking fixer up or maybe.

[E]

No, no, no, no, no, no. Just automotive. The.

[B]

It's a. It's a 50 grand truck.

[E]

50,000?

[B]

Yes, sir.

[E]

All right.

[B]

And if that'll be. That'll buy it. I'll send you a check.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's. I've only had it three or four months, and I'm just gonna put a offer in some other property. That's all I'm doing. Cash out some capital.

[B]

Yeah, no, we can. What. What city you're in? New Orleans. Yeah, we can send one of our guys down there and pick it up, you know, Tuesday. Do you have. Do you have a. Do you have a clear title? Is there a payoff?

[E]

That's payoff.

[B]

So what we would do on that, if you go pay it off and have the title in hand, we can give you all the money at once. Otherwise, we will pay off the payoff, give you half your equity up front. And we've got to do that to keep you tied to us getting that title, because what. The reason I do that is so that I can't. The deal's really not done for me until I get my title from the lender. And if you have all your equity already, and I'm just jacking with your lender, if they get weird with me and you're already paid, then you don't really have any motivation to make sure they get me my title. Does that make sense? So that.

[G]

Right.

[B]

That's why I hold back half of it. So. Which, you know, it typically takes three weeks to get the damn title in, and it rarely ever happens, but sometimes they get saucy with us, and they're like, well, you're not our customer. We need to talk to our customer. And if we paid the customer off full, they don't take the damn phone call anyway.

[E]

It's Navy Federal.

[B]

Then they're quick. They're quick. They're two weeks out. So, yeah, we'll. We'll pay off the payoff and pay your equity and get it rolling.

[E]

All right, I'll. I'll run it through the computer and figure it out from there.

[B]

Thanks, man. Let's go.

[G]

I hope you don't mind. I posted a news story on the John Clay Wolf show Facebook page.

[B]

Okay.

[G]

The reason I'm asking your permission is it's a naked man on the front picture. He's sitting in a lounge.

[B]

Is Facebook friendly.

[G]

It is, actually. He's naked in handcuffs, sitting in a broken recliner, and here's the headline. Okay, tell me if this doesn't sound.

[B]

Tell us, J.D.

[G]

Tell me if this doesn't sound like a TV show. Texas Meth heroin ring included the Aryan Brotherhood and a Bush's chicken joint.

[B]

What?

[G]

Yes.

[E]

Wow.

[C]

That guy was sitting naked.

[G]

But this goes from Fort Worth. This little group of people that are selling heroin and Meth are based out of a chicken joint. And this goes from Fort Worth all the way to Austin. And they've almost.

[B]

Sounds like a TV show.

[G]

It's called Operation Ice Storm. They netted 23 arrests this week. Oh, my God.

[B]

So is there a little black guy named Gus behind the counter at the chicken joint?

[G]

Apparently, no, they didn't show the chicken joint, but they do show the guy with the little goatee sitting naked in the chair. He's facing away from the camera, by the way.

[C]

So that guy was the tester.

[B]

Hey, anybody listening? Catch me up. I guess I could just Google it, but I'm too lazy. Call in 800-800-RADIO. What's going on with Better Call Saul? Is it back on yet? Is the season coming? I mean, Breaking Bad, that rolled into Better Call Saul is the best piece of TV work, short of Dallas, that I've ever seen in my library.

[F]

Ought to be coming back really soon.

[B]

Yeah, it's about time, isn't it?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

I love that show. Love that show. 800. 800-723-4. 800. Better Call Saul got really good last season. It turned into Breaking Bad.

[E]

What is.

[F]

Did it?

[G]

Was there a final?

[B]

No, it's.

[G]

No.

[B]

Okay. Oh, cliffhanger.

[F]

There was kind of a cliffhanger, right? His little. His little girlfriend had a car accident and then was all pilled up for a few weeks.

[C]

Have you been following the sports world, John, in college basketball?

[B]

No.

[C]

So the big scandal finally came out in college basketball. Only 20 schools so far have been caught paying their kids.

[B]

SMU's got to be.

[C]

Now, it's not so much the schools, it's boosters. And then also Adidas, Nike.

[B]

But they're all.

[C]

It's all involved. And they just finally found this out. And even FBI is the ones actually busted this case. A coach in Arizona, head coach in Arizona was on the phone talking about, hey, I've got Adidas on the line. They're going to pay you 100 grand. Come to my school.

[B]

Do you have the clip?

[C]

No, I don't have the clip.

[B]

Now, did he really say that?

[C]

And I'm paraphrasing, but yes. Yeah, I mean, that's. It's. And it's not just him. There's 20 school big schools.

[B]

Kentucky Adidas is going to pay you 100,000 if you come here.

[C]

Yep, there they got that. They have appearances, autograph signings, which is. This is all stuff that they should get paid for, right?

[B]

Should this guy. And marijuana should be legal in all 50 states. So they say.

[C]

Okay, so you don't think kids should be paid to play?

[B]

Not basketball. What.

[C]

What if they. Okay, so what if they made it across the board? Football for any student athlete gets $1,000 a month. But you have to have your GPA at a certain level.

[G]

Sure, you got to keep.

[C]

And then.

[B]

But I mean, that'd be a pay cut for all of them.

[C]

Well, that's what I say. And any endorsements you do outside, fine.

[B]

But here's up to you. But here's your. Here's your. Your Democratic side, your liberal side. Showing up early. Okay, all players get a thousand dollars a month. What about the good ones?

[C]

I know.

[B]

What about the good ones?

[C]

They're the ones that go and get the Adidas contract. They're the ones that go get the commercials.

[B]

So you're saying they should get some more? Oh, yeah, of course.

[G]

A thousand across the board. And then if you're good enough, you get investment deals.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Call this. Yeah, you go to Adidas.com and put in a request, you're in commercials.

[C]

I mean, like Johnny Manziel, he would have made more money in college than he did in the NFL if they allowed him to do that.

[F]

That's more Republican than anything else. I mean, let's see what the market will bear.

[B]

That is.

[C]

That is now, what kind of combination?

[B]

So was SMU in it?

[C]

No.

[B]

Oh, my God. I can't believe it.

[C]

So far. So far. So far.

[B]

And then Gary Patterson from tcu. Listen, BE filed suit on TCU last week for forcing him to. He. Listen, BE was one of their key receivers, and he claims that the coaching staff at TC forced him to play hurt, ruined his professional career, and he wants his money.

[G]

Oh, my God.

[B]

And it's pretty. Reading the claim, which I read a lot of it. I mean, this one's good. This one. What, you think it's a stretch how.

[C]

Many coaches don't say. I mean, that's.

[B]

That's just football. I understand people win money for pouring hot coffee on themselves from McDonald's.

[G]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

So to have changed and they just didn't realize it was like that there's going to be athletes that are going to.

[B]

He's going to win. If. If he can prove what he's claiming, he's going to win, and it's going to set precedents. This guy had a professional career in front of him. Professional career would have paid him. X. I spent it on you for free because you forced me to. And I want my money.

[C]

Is it forced or. It's like. It's more of, hey, that's where I say.

[B]

That's where I say. It'll really come in the test. Testimony and depositions and witnesses. If anybody comes out and supports his claim, that is reliable.

[G]

He didn't want to play and we forced him to play.

[C]

More of a guilt trip is what happened. I guarantee the coaches, you know, they just constantly.

[B]

If there was a medical, especially if there was a doctor that said no and they said yes, they have liability, man.

[G]

Yeah, they have a doctor.

[B]

Have you read it? It does sound like you've dug into this one because you're typically on top of. No, that.

[C]

No, I. I didn't know exactly what you're talking about. I'm just thinking from the side of sure, the coaches. This is just. That's kind of. It's always happened. That's always been the way. But they haven't changed with times yet. And they. They're gonna get caught. Get caught speeding here.

[B]

In other news, Cowboys still suck.

[G]

God.

[C]

But we have a cowboy truck running at the auction. If you want to.

[G]

On our Facebook page. What is that? The Dallas Cowboys suck. Sell that to us.

[C]

Actually, the alter ego of Pre K is Austin, the car buyer.

[G]

Right.

[C]

And he is the one that actually bought that. Yes.

[G]

It looks like something rowdy. The cheerleader from the Cowboys would drive to appearances. It literally does.

[C]

It has on one side Dak Prescott. Yeah, we be Dak. Saying in big letters. And I mean, this is a big blown up. Throwing.

[G]

Throwing the ball sticker. This is the side of the car.

[C]

And then on the other side is Zeke. And it says, feed me. Feed them or feed me. I think it says on the side.

[G]

I didn't see that.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[B]

So this is a white country girl with a Texas A M shirt on and in, like, plaid rubber boots. Hey, Prek, can you hear us talking?

[I]

Yeah, what up?

[B]

So I didn't meet this young lady, but just looking at this whole scene between this truck and her outfit and her smile and everything, feeling that she might like the football player type.

[I]

Yeah, you wouldn't be wrong.

[B]

Okay, what would I mean? Did you meet her?

[I]

Oh, yeah, yeah. She was a very sweet lady.

[B]

Did she have any men with her?

[I]

Oh, yeah, she had. She had a guy with her.

[B]

White guy or black guy?

[I]

A black guy.

[B]

Boyfriend.

[I]

I didn't dare that deep, man, you know, Name was Shad. You know, he was a cool cat, too.

[B]

Now, the. The. The husband. Husband passed away. Is that correct? This was his truck?

[I]

Yeah. Unfortunately, it was the deceased husband.

[B]

Did you see the picture of him? Did we Have a driver's license on him.

[I]

I did see a picture of him. She showed me a picture.

[B]

Black guy or black guy?

[I]

It was a black guy.

[B]

Okay. That's all fine. I'm just. And, you know, I just look at situations. I'm like, yeah, you learn. It's all my. My. My end. Yeah. So she. She likes football players.

[G]

Sure.

[B]

I bet they both played football, too. Two in high school. 800-800-7234.

[E]

Probably.

[B]

800, 800 radio Philip in Baton Rouge. Good morning.

[E]

Hey, good morning.

[B]

Hey. 99 Dakota RT. How nice is it?

[E]

It's immaculate. It's a show truck.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

I. I ended up picking it up from somebody in Indiana and it was an older fella and he bought it. Somebody redid it, and it's just been sitting in the garage for seven years. And it runs like a top. It's a monster truck.

[B]

Is it four wheel drive or two?

[E]

It's two.

[B]

You said monster. You don't mean it's lifted. You just mean it's monster. Like badass monster.

[E]

It's badass. Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

It's immaculate. It's. You couldn't find a. A better RT99.

[B]

Now it's got that fender flare and that good wheel on it. I mean, does it have the stock? Look, I need to see pictures of this rig.

[E]

I know. I'd love to see some pictures. I need to see some. It's got. It's got the factory Dodge rims on it. Yeah, it's. It's perfect.

[B]

Is it four grand?

[E]

It's red.

[B]

Is it four grand?

[E]

What's that?

[B]

Is it like four grand?

[E]

Yeah, it is. Four red.

[B]

No. Is it about 4,000?

[E]

No, it's worth more than that.

[B]

What. What do you take for it?

[E]

I'd have to send you some pictures of it, so. Let you decide on that.

[B]

No. What? No, I can't decide what you'll take for it.

[E]

Well, I know. I think. I think you'd come up with a whole lot more than 4,000.

[B]

Okay. It's still a 99 Dakota RT. It's not a. It's not a Typhoon. It's not a Cobra Mustang. You know, it's cool, but it ain't collector cool. I just don't think the brand and that model and make went into heavy collector Status like a 93 Cobra. Right. Or, you know, with short miles. You know, I gave 20,000. $25,000 for one of those the other day. But in 99 or a typhoon, what was the other one called? A Cyclone. Yeah. I don't think this is. I think it's good looking and I think it's four to five grand is what the real money is. I mean, you can ask 10, you might find somebody that'll trip up and give 7,500. But I, for the cash market, what I do, I think it's four to five grand. But I'll look at the pictures. I look at the. But no matter how great the pictures are, it's still, it's still not what you're wanting it to be, in my opinion. Does it make sense?

[E]

Okay.

[B]

All right, all right. Give me the vin.com. send us some pictures. 800-800-7234. My name is John Clay Wolf. I buy cars on the radio. Holden. Hang on, let me grab him real quick. Put him on hold. D.J. holden, real quick. Good morning, L.A. you there?

[E]

Hello?

[B]

Hey, Holden. Yes, sir, what you got?

[E]

Hey, I just would like to, you know, you're listening, give a testimonial. Yeah, unfortunately we have, we have, we had a mother that came up with some dementia. We have, you know, brother and I both busy, we're both power of attorneys on her and I suggested give you a call and what you say is what comes out.

[B]

That's nice. That's what nobody wants to believe. How can a car dealer.

[E]

My brother is the most pessimistical person in the world. I said call him. And like I said, I was in, I was in the wholesale business years ago with somebody out of Austin and, but I mean he, he did it. And you know what? 48 hours later there was a wrecker. Oh, I mean, and once he got.

[B]

The check, I bet he was telling you, oh, it ain't gonna clear.

[E]

Oh, no, no, absolutely not. It was, it was, it was paid for, bump done, it was gone.

[B]

Good. What kind of car did I pick up on a record?

[E]

Pardon?

[B]

What kind of car did I pick up on a wrecker?

[E]

It was a, it was a little Hyundai suv. I'm sorry, A little Kia, a low key suv. We had it from my mother and she, you know, she's got dementia. So instead of us, you know, I live with, you know, in Bro Bridge and he lives in Covington. And we didn't have time to sell it because we both, you know, quite busy and I just didn't want to deal with the public and John Clay Wolf and you know, you know, all.

[B]

Times, hey, did strip club DJ, a great big 400 pound goofy guy come by to pick it up. Wasn't there, you would have remembered this.

[C]

He wasn't there.

[B]

He's an interesting cat, man. He is. He is one of y'. All. He's cool. All right. Thanks, Holden. I appreciate it.

[E]

I appreciate you. I mean, like I said, it's just a testimonial to everybody out there. This does work.

[B]

Thanks again, dude. That's great. Appreciate it. That's what makes it all better.

[D]

Givethevin.com presents the John Clay Wolf Show. We'll be right back after this.

[A]

Hear us out. We beat CarMax at GiveMeTheVin.com the quicker you can get that message across in your mind, the less money we have to spend on advertising. And we can even put more money in buying your cars. @givemethevin.com we are the newest. We are the biggest. We are the baddest online car buyer in the South. GiveMeTheVin.com if we don't beat your CarMax offer, we'll pay you a hundred dollars.

[F]

Sell us your car. Give me the vin.com. so easy you can do it in your underwear.

[B]

Is.

[C]

Hang on a second.

[B]

Yeah, hang on to this, buddy. Give me the VIN.

[D]

Givemethebin.com and now, Senor Juan Clay Wolf.

[B]

What did Lindsey Vaughn do in the Olympics? Tiger's girl.

[C]

She got a bronze medal.

[B]

She likes bronze.

[G]

Nice.

[E]

Nice.

[B]

You laid it up there. You live. He's a Texan. He's the accidental racist. That was not an accident. It's just. She got a gold. I mean, she just didn't she. She likes bronze. My name is John Clay Wolf. J.D. ryan.

[G]

Morning.

[C]

For those that don't know, she's dating Tiger woods still again, I think. On and off.

[B]

Right? He likes the. You know. Cluck Norris has some thoughts on this. Where is CL. Our little rooster?

[G]

Oh, here he comes.

[F]

Come here.

[B]

Get over here, Clock. Get up there on the counter.

[G]

Up on the counter.

[B]

Here you go, papa. Put that mic next to his beak. There you go.

[G]

Move it over there.

[F]

See now, John, Y. You know you talking about the white meat Y and the dark meat. And you better know now I'm a rooster.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

And as such, I'm going to love all them hens. And I'm going to pay some special attention to them breasters. Cause I like the white meat, too. But, but, but, but I'm of a mind too, that if you go make a woman love your sorry ass. If you want that sugar to pour, you better pay some extra loving attention to them thighs and them legs. That dog meat I got you. But now that's for hens.

[G]

That's hens.

[F]

And I know them hens back to front to right side up to left side down.

[B]

You do.

[F]

And they do seem to respond to what Cluck brings to the coup.

[B]

But.

[E]

But.

[F]

And it's a big butt.

[G]

I bet it is.

[F]

Come to you mens. You know, you ain't got no kind of white meat, dark meat situation. No, you talking about whole live women's.

[B]

Right?

[F]

Women's.

[G]

The whole thing.

[F]

And your preference is just that, Ringo, a preference. And you best not be switching from dark to light and back again unless you want your nuts in a deep fryer. And in case you got any questions. Questions about what to do.

[C]

Yeah.

[F]

Keep an eye on me, because my name is Cluck.

[G]

We got you.

[F]

And I'm here to know.

[B]

Hey, on a different note, if you're a PHP developer, a programmer, we're hiring PHP coders. PHP programs. [e-mail].

[F]

What'S that you're saying?

[B]

I'm saying we need some computer nerds. We have some computer nerds. And Rob just texted me earlier and I forgot to put it out there. We need. We're definitely looking to hire a new programmer that is literate in php.php. we don't need a dot net guy, we don't need a python guy. Php. We need PCP. I mean PHP. Yeah. And I'm sure since.

[C]

What the hell does that mean?

[G]

I don't even know.

[B]

I've said more than I.

[F]

If you'd like to translate for the ethnically challenged, we're hiring hired geeks. You'll never be allowed to touch the money.

[B]

There's a special geek. There's different flavors of geeks. Not database guys, not.net guys. See, these coders, they. They learn languages just like French and English and Puerto Rican. Puerto Rican would be a slang off of American in Spanish. Right? And that is kind of like Python is a slang off of php. And there's some database guys in that. We need a straight up PHP guy.

[F]

So your doctor's thesis would be a critical analysis of west side Story?

[B]

Something like that. Okay, yes, we're racist in our hiring of programmers. I don't care if you're from India. I don't care if you're a kunas. I don't care if you're a redneck up in a chicken coop in Arkansas. If you're badass at PHP, you need to go to [e-mail] Now, I don't mean PCP. There's a difference, HP, because we definitely need to hire a guy to finish a project that we're working on. Okay, what have you got?

[G]

We got here.

[B]

Oh I was speaking of PHP or no pcp. John and Abilene.

[G]

God.

[B]

John and Abilene. Are you there? John? Naveline going once. John and Abilene going twice. John and Abilene. Please go to givemetheven.com and load it up. I will buy an OH1 Nissan Frontier 4 wheel drive because the Mexicans love them. They do.

[G]

Where do they take them?

[B]

They take them to the border.

[E]

Right?

[F]

Over the border.

[B]

Not over the border, to the border, to the border. And then the Mexicans come over the border and they buy them. They take them over.

[G]

Didn't you say they're like little trolleys?

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

Lash them together.

[B]

Yeah, sure, but. But have you ever been to Mexico?

[G]

Yeah.

[B]

Did you notice a lot of nice new cars?

[H]

No.

[B]

Okay, well the old cars that are still Val but like a import four wheel drive truck even big miles. Mexico, Peru. We ship cars all over the country. That Lamborghini went to Dubai.

[H]

Did it really? Yeah.

[B]

Holy cow. Yeah, through another broker ironically.

[G]

So much money over there.

[B]

Oh I mean we send you know the, the Land Crew cruisers go to Cambodia. It's ridiculous. Dude. If you, if you put GPS's on these cars and follow around the world.

[G]

Just all over the place and why.

[B]

The hell do you know why would you send a Range Rover to America from Britain or wherever the hell they make them and then it gets shipped to South Africa. Wouldn't it go replacing get them over there?

[G]

You would think.

[B]

I don't get it directed to the factory. You know China produces more new cars than America. They're selling their SAR. Their daily. Their annual is higher than the United States of America on new cars. General Motors business is bigger in China than it is in US.

[G]

Really?

[B]

Yes. Yes.

[G]

I had no idea.

[B]

Where the hell are they going to drive? You can't even walk down the street there. Why do they need cars? Little scooters and are all the cars you want they have free Rosa seats since everybody's so short they can fit them all the same deal.

[C]

It may be all the small sonics and stuff like that. Small cars.

[B]

No, it's not. It's Buicks and Cadillacs.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

There's nowhere to drive them.

[B]

Do they have. Do they have pedal extenders on them? Is that where that button came from?

[F]

Tell it, tell it. Brother John.

[B]

Stop.

[G]

Stop.

[F]

Exactly right telling on the mountain. That's exactly why I like I35. That highway runs all the way to Paraguay.

[B]

Tell you what.

[G]

Okay, Buster dicks from the Austin Buster Dicks.

[B]

We are in election season and how is your campaign going?

[F]

That's right. This time of year, it ain't just election season, okay? This time around, it's NAFTA season.

[G]

NAFTA season.

[F]

They talk like they're going to take us away, right?

[G]

They're trying to.

[F]

It was like something bad. Yeah, well, it might have been something bad back 1994, but now, boys, we got it now, okay? Yeah, yeah. This is like the New Testament. You can't take it back.

[E]

No.

[F]

Okay. Tell it to Matthew, Mark, Luton, John.

[B]

Okay?

[F]

That's exactly what I'm talking about.

[G]

No, I don't.

[B]

It's.

[F]

No, Ecclesiastes ain't gonna cover this.

[E]

I don't get it.

[F]

All right, them trucks coming up down. You got trucks from Mexico, go all the way up Canada, back again. They got every bit of clearance that I get from United Express.

[G]

Are you talking about.

[B]

I understand what he's saying, okay? He's saying that the. The pathway is clear for North America Intercommerce. And you. What did they say? You'll hear a big sucking sound from Mexico about 15 years ago when this. Or 20 years ago when this cleared. And sure enough, and here's Trump trying to shut off the sucking sound.

[F]

It's like a young man's dream, though. You know what I'm talking about? 24 years later. No, it sucks, it blows. It's all over you. I mean, all right, NAFTA is going to work for everybody. It's just too bad. But it's what we got.

[B]

You heard it here first from Buster Dix, your state representative from Austin, Texas. Austin, San Antonio. Thanks for tuning in. Corpus Christi, Oklahoma City, of course, Houston, all of Louisiana. Eagle listener. New Orleans, Arkansas, where else? Shreveport, Midland, Midland, Oak, Amarillo by morning. Wichita Falls, Corpus Christi, everywhere.

[C]

Port Lavaca, all that.

[B]

Port Lavaca. We'll see y' all next Saturday. My name is John Clay Wolf. My name's Cluck and I came here to buy cars. And you can get them. You can sell [e-mail]. give me the vinyl and we'll try to bid your cars between curling competitions on. On the television because we're all dialed in, man. We'll see you later. Locker out. I'm out. Back to the money. Time is money.

[A]

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