The John Clay Wolfe Show – Episode #138 (03/03/18)

Aired: February 13, 2026

Overview

This episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show serves up its trademark rowdy blend of car talk, listener calls, irreverent observations, and comedic banter. John and crew riff on everything from buying exotic cars (including Beyoncé’s Rolls-Royce and the new Dodge Demon) to the ins and outs of used car appraisals, wild listener stories, and occasional detours into Texas/Oklahoma oil booms, clergy tax loopholes, and “creative” truck restoration. Spike it with music, running jokes about staff absences and lawyers, playful mockery (“sellthatmobile”), and the show’s signature call-in games—this is Saturday morning radio in all its unfiltered glory.

Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. A Summer Morning Feelin’, Cool Cars & “Stuntin”

• John opens the show (01:43)
  • “Feels like summer morning, man… when I walked outside, it just slung wood right in my britches.” – John Clay Wolfe (02:00)
• Banter about driving a yellow Dodge Demon and Beyoncé’s family Rolls-Royce (02:15–03:07, 09:19–10:08)
  • Confirmed: it’s actually Beyoncé's dad’s car—purchased and now part of John’s collection.
  • John jokes about “stuntin’,” music video shoots, and driving flashy cars outside his usual auction habitat.
• “Letting the girls out of the strip club”: metaphor for taking exotic cars out in public (03:46)
• “We’re just rich and we drive them around, man.” – John Clay Wolfe (04:22)
• Uncle Roy stories: nostalgia and humor about family car traditions (04:41–05:41).

2. Buying and Selling Cars On Air (Constant Theme)

• Caller Appraisals & “GiveMeTheVIN.com” Pitch
  • John bids on vehicles live, walking through offers with callers (06:24–09:05, 12:35–14:05, 18:00–20:04, throughout).
  • Notable negotiation: GMC truck caller, “Because you’re just a hard-driving, deal-grinding Johnson County son of a bitch.” – John (08:03)
  • Calls on lifted Sequoia, oddball projects (restorable Porsches, rare haulers), and high-mileage trucks.
• The Value of High Mileage Cars
  • Repeated rants on the dangers of “200,000 mile crap” (39:15, 69:05, and the legendary on-air buyer-room meltdown).
  • “Somebody needs to wake the F up and figure out how to buy cars and quit being a dumbass.” – John (70:24)

3. Show Characters & Running Gags

• Show regulars:
  • JD Ryan, Michael Turley, DJ Pre K (dubbed for being “half white, half black”), Uncle Roy, Bobo (absent; rumors he’s “on strike” with an entertainment lawyer).
• Randy the Chipmunk – Returns from Mardi Gras, regales everyone with a drunken animal kingdom bead story. (18:34–23:02)
• Staff banter: Headliners, lawyers, missing producers, “painfully white,” and more.

4. Vehicles of Note

• Beyoncé’s Rolls-Royce:
  • “When my wife found out we bought Beyoncé's Rolls… she just died. Like one of those passing out goats.” – John (10:11, 10:16)
• Dodge Demon (John’s personal car):
  • Detailed discussion of the car’s arrival, features, and risk of “killing yourself” behind the wheel (61:10–62:27).
  • 0–60 acceleration, “red key for 840hp,” and waiver required at purchase.
• “Cattle Drive” Hauler Project:
  • A custom, fully Western-themed 1956 truck—murals, hauler bed, big block engine.
  • Soliciting listener input for the restoration’s headliner: “Should we use red, Texas flag, leather, tooled fabric?” (33:09–35:08, 42:29–44:54)
  • Facebook photos referenced, audience ideas range from calfskin to a fiber optic “night sky.”
• SellThatMobile/“Buy That Bitch” Mobile:
  • Brainstorming names for a mobile car-buying Sprinter van—“Sell That Mobile” wins out. (46:01–47:41)
  • Listeners jump online to claim possible .com domains, leading to a squatter subplot and jokes about trademark disputes. (87:00–88:09)

5. “Black, White, Latino or Other” Game

• DJ Pre K runs the infamous guessing game based on news crime stories (29:36–32:43).
  • E.g., suspects jumping a fence into a police station parking lot: “Well, the statistics are wrong, man. 28-year-old Marwan Al Ibadi and 29-year-old Salma Horay.” (32:43)
  • Banter about stereotypes, racial humor, and listener interaction.

6. Listener Calls – Lightning Round

• Dozens of fast-paced on-air appraisals—trucks, Ferraris, Sonatas, Sequoias, GTOs, RVs (RP: 92:25, 92:36, 113:19, 137:01).
  • True value vs. wishful “payoff” delusions properly skewered.
  • Frequent call-out: “Go to GiveMeTheVIN.com, load it up, get paid today!”

7. Industry, Regional, and News Jokes

• Oil Field Economy:
  • Listeners from West Texas report an oil boom exceeding the pre-crash era: “Twice as heavy” as before (143:39).
• Pastor/Clergy Tax Loopholes:
  • “Clergy hustler” segment on pastors, tax-exempt cars, jets, and the blurry definition of ‘legitimate’ church.
  • Call-ins from lawyers clarify IRS rules (132:30–135:06).
• News bits: Drunk flights (154:56), Uber drivers, Scotland booze tax, LL Bean’s gun policy.

8. Memorable Quotes & Moments

• “It’s just legalized gambling... If you say you win on every sports bet, you’re just a damn liar, right? I lose all the time.” – John (36:03)
• “It’s like a Mexican calling another Mexican bad words, or a white guy calling a bad... yeah, he’s from Johnson county, redneck to redneck, I can call him whatever I want.” – John (06:57)
• “You can polish a turd till it shines, still a turd.” – Listener from Odessa (140:21)
• “The day of the free Mexican is coming gone. This ain’t Roots, baby. Everybody’s getting paid.” – John (74:42)
• “Some coon ass from Lafayette, Louisiana helped us and worked it out. That’s why a lot of good music comes from down there.” – John (47:03)
• “Shoot beans at him through a bean hole.” – Caller on clergy scammers, illustrating colorful Texas justice. (132:16)

9. Show Tone & Style

• Warm, bawdy, rapid-fire and Southern-accented, this is infotainment with a no-BS, working man’s point of view.
• Frequent lampooning, affectionate trash talk among the crew, and playful edginess.
• Musically eclectic, often using songs as segment openers or themed jokes.

Notable Segment Timestamps

• Cool Cars/Opening Banter: 01:43–04:41
• Beyoncé’s Rolls Debuts: 02:53, 09:19–10:16, 101:22
• Dodge Demon Talk: 02:10, 09:42–10:08, 61:10–62:27
• Randy the Chipmunk Segment: 18:34–23:02
• Lightning Car Appraisal Segment: 92:25–94:15
• High-Mileage Car Rant (Epic): 39:15, 69:05–70:46
• Headliner Restoration Brainstorm: 33:09–35:08, 42:29–44:54
• Banter/Mockery about “SellThatMobile” and Domain Squatters: 46:01–47:41, 87:00–88:09
• “Black, White, Latino or Other” Game: 29:36–32:43
• Clergy Hustler Calls: 131:04–135:46

Conclusion

This episode is a pitch-perfect sample of The John Clay Wolfe Show’s appeal—irreverent car expertise, regional storytelling, and an “anything can happen” live-radio feel. With laugh-out-loud rants, dead-serious car business takeaways, oddball characters, and advice thrown in alongside local news and music, it’s both a testament to the enduring joy of radio camaraderie and a window into small-town, full-throttle Saturday morning America.

Ready to buy or sell a wild ride?
John’s advice: “Go to GiveMeTheVIN.com, load it up, and get paid today—hell, we’ll buy Beyoncé’s Rolls, your Demon, or your grandma’s old Mercury.”