The John Clay Wolfe Show – Episode #152 Summary (June 9, 2018)
Overview
This episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show, powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com, blends the team’s signature mix of irreverent talk, car deals, wild speculation, rowdy anecdotes, and free-wheeling banter. The crew dives into recent celebrity deaths, conspiracy theories, behind-the-scenes chaos at their offices, tales from the car business, sports post-mortems, and plenty of wild digressions. As always, listeners call in to sell their cars, and the GiveMeTheVIN party at the Alamo Drafthouse is heavily promoted—with the typical blend of hard sells and mockery.
Key Segments & Highlights
1. Remembering Celebrity Deaths & Dark Theories
Timestamps: [01:19] – [04:47]
- Tom Petty, Anthony Bourdain, Kate Spade: The crew starts by noting the recent spate of celebrity deaths.
- Conspiracy Spirals: JD floats bizarre theories about Trump being connected to Bourdain and Kate Spade’s deaths:
“Andy Bourdain was spoke out against Trump and now he’s. I don't know.” – JD [01:37]
Turley quickly dismisses this:
“It’s a terrible theory.” – Turley [02:07] - Kate Spade Story: John weaves Kate Spade’s suicide into a car sales analogy:
“When you sell your car short to the car dealers, you should… then you feel like blowing your head off.” – John Clay Wolfe [03:48]
- Segue masterclass: The show lampoons its own ability to pivot between the morbid and the sales pitch.
2. Show Promotions: Listener Party Hype
Timestamps: [05:20], [15:54], [41:54], [58:23]
- The Alamo Drafthouse Pre-Show Party:
Repeatedly plugged:“Tomorrow at the Alamo Drafthouse, five to seven. We’ll have beer, we’ll have girls, we’ll have free stuff.” – JD Ryan [05:20]
- VIP Passes Contest: Giveaways for concert tickets (Tesla, Joan Jett, Styx) based on who travels furthest [58:07].
- Buck Wild Girls:
“Stable of fine young ladies that are just coming along to help us have a good time, make sandwiches, photo ops...” – Turley [59:30]
3. Suicide, Spectacle & Shameful Segues
Timestamps: [04:19], [07:12], [08:21]
- Bourdain and Kate Spade:
The hosts explore insensitive (and darkly comic) suicide theories, then connect them to car selling, with callous self-awareness:“If you go to GiveMeTheVin.com and spot check with your therapist before you trade…” – John [03:57]
4. Caller Interactions: Cars, Deals, and Negotiations
Timestamps: [10:00] onward (recurring)
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Selling Cars Live: Callers pitch their vehicles—Hyundai Sonata [10:00], Cadillac Escalade [21:24], Honda Civic [24:42], Viper truck [54:17], Bentley Continental [88:53], and more.
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John’s Bidding War Style:
“I’d hate to price another man’s property, but I will…” – John [21:57]
He tries to buy caller's cars by outbidding what the computer says, with on-air negotiation. -
Notable Close:
“Mental masturbation is not what I'm into this morning.” – John [57:52]
5. Life at the GiveMeTheVIN Office
Timestamps: [35:50], [36:45], [39:23]
- “Driver problems”: Stories of hiring mishaps, including a shoe-less employee being called a “crackhead” and promptly fired by “Uncle Roy.”
- Homeless Intrusions & Office Security:
The team recounts incidents of homeless men wandering into their buyer’s room, negotiations with bums, and graphic tales of “projectile” poop on building balconies.“Let me tell you what you should have done. Next time, you need to take a breakfast burrito and... just whip it out.” – John [38:41]
This segues into talk of arming staff near potential breach points.
6. Behind the Comedy: The Stress of Leadership
Timestamps: [101:06], [109:00]
- JD’s Health Intervention:
JD tries to persuade John to take his health seriously:“You sort of have almost the perfect storm for bad things. And we lost another friend this week. And it made me wonder who.” – JD [107:06]
John responds with brutal honesty about his past, the pressure of running the business, and why he’s not ready to slow down.
“I want to finish this job. I got a job to finish, JD. And it's to become the used car manager of the United States of America.” – John [110:00]
7. Wacky Workplace Antics
Timestamps: [30:37], [130:00]
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Thrown Burritos: John launches a breakfast burrito at an “account executive” after a frustrating exchange about advertising rates.
“So what I did is I took the breakfast burrito and I threw it at his head and I said, stop bringing me breakfast burritos and bring me some freaking numbers that make sense.” – John [31:46]
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Staff Lodging:
Bobbo sleeps in the studio awaiting his apartment, prompting gross-out jokes about the state of the couch and cleaning rituals.“Did you wear a shirt? … Your nappy skin, the unbathed skin is all over my fancy couch.” – John [126:19]
8. Sports Breakdown with a Twist
Timestamps: [19:03] – [21:17]; [136:27]
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LeBron & NBA Finals:
The crew discusses LeBron James’ performance and JR Smith’s infamous blunder, with comic analogies to J. Lo losing her butt.“That would like be like J. Lo being so mad, she made somebody spank her real hard. Lost her butt.” – John [20:16]
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Oklahoma City Thunder: Talk about Oklahoma sports “free rides” and the proposed “Oklahoma Tweakers” NFL team.
9. Office, Business, & Expansion
Timestamps: [28:28], [156:08]
- Show Expansion: Hints at syndication into new markets including Washington DC and San Diego, accompanied by griping about scheduling.
- Facility Challenges: Debates over moving offices, and worries about scaling infrastructure as the company grows.
10. Memorable Bits & Recurring Laughs
Black, White, Latino, or Other
Timestamps: [47:41]
DJ Pre K runs a “guess the crime perp ethnicity” bit—turns into a riff on prosthetic limbs and racial stereotypes.
Fitness & Overworking
Timestamps: [153:28]
John’s wife overexerts for “Camp Gladiator,” leading to concern about overworking and health consequences.
Free Coffee Gag
Timestamps: [87:41], [113:33]
John offers free coffee at La Madeleine (“put it on John Clay Wolfe’s tab!”) in all cities, volunteers to pay if corporate catches on.
Closing Out
- “If you want to sell your car, go to givemethevin.com. We'll do that.” – John [143:41]
Notable Quotes
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On Clubbing Conspiracy Theories:
“Metaphysical meanderings with my friend JD Ryan.” – Turley [02:15]
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On Comparing Losing Out on a Car to Kate Spade:
“When you sell your car short to the car dealers, you should…then you feel like blowing your head off.” – John [03:48]
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On Office Security:
“I want a pistol under your desk. Because if the day that that guy comes through that door high on drugs, you need to…blow his head off like a video game.” – John [40:09]
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On Not Drinking, and Listener’s Concerns:
“Out of all the things going on in the world, they want to know if… you drinking? Who killed Anthony Bourdain? Did Donald Trump really say grab her by the p…” – John [14:04]
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On Staff Hygiene:
“Did you wear a shirt? …Your nappy skin, the unbathed skin is all over my fancy couch.” – John [126:19]
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On Marketing Savvy:
“I'm introducing Starbucks people to La Madeleine coffee. Because on a Saturday morning they get out of their Starbucks group and they might take a moment to try La Madeleine coffee.” – John [114:28]
Segment Timestamps (Selected)
| Time | Segment/Topic | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------------| | 01:19 | Celebrity deaths & wild theories | | 05:20 | Listener party promo (Alamo Drafthouse) | | 10:00 | Caller: Selling a Hyundai Sonata | | 21:24 | Caller: Selling Cadillac Escalade | | 24:42 | Caller: Selling Honda Civic | | 35:50 | Hiring/firing chaos in the office | | 38:41 | Office homeless/bombarding with bums | | 41:54 | Buck Wild Girls at Listener Party | | 47:41 | Black, White, Latino, or Other (DJ Pre K’s bit) | | 54:17 | Caller: Viper truck negotiations | | 88:53 | Caller: Bentley Continental | | 109:00 | John’s philosophy on work, life, mortality | | 130:00 | Bobbo sleeping in office, janitor’s tales | | 136:27 | Sports: NBA Finals, LeBron, Thunder |
Tone & Style
- Loose, irreverent, and rapid-fire: The team thrives on inside jokes, ragging on each other, and rollercoaster transitions from death to car deals to breakfast complaints.
- Sales, self-promotion, and self-mockery: Any mention of tragedy or controversy quickly pivots to a self-aware sales plug or a crude analogy.
- Unfiltered language, especially in “off-air” sections and the end of the show—producers, be warned.
For New Listeners
This episode is a perfect, if chaotic, encapsulation of The John Clay Wolfe Show: a comedic spin cycle of car trading, Texas lifestyle, sports, morbid gags, off-color bits, and over-the-top character. If you like mock conspiracies, hot-mic moments, blue-collar hustle, and are not easily offended, you’ll find plenty to laugh at and marvel over here.
Listen for:
- Callers haggling, office soap opera, Buck Wild Girls, bold claims about free coffee, and spontaneous, dangerous comedy.
- Key recurring phrases: “givemethevin.com,” “plugging the hell out of that place,” “mental masturbation,” “shut up and turn the radio on.”
