#168 John Clay Wolfe Show 10.06.18

Summary

The John Clay Wolfe Show – Episode #168

Original Air Date: February 13, 2026

Main Theme:

A classic episode of freewheeling radio chaos, this week’s show blends regional smack talk (centered on the Texas vs. Oklahoma football rivalry), under-the-hood banter about used cars, irreverent life stories, and special guest comedian Ali Siddiq. The crew takes listeners on a ride through sports, auto selling, southern culture, rock & roll, and office antics, all with a sharp, often unfiltered, comic edge.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Texas vs. Oklahoma Weekend Madness

• Rivalry Trash Talk
  • The crew sets the scene for the intense UT vs. OU football game in Dallas, poking fun at Oklahoma fans' cars breaking down and the social rituals surrounding the Cotton Bowl.
  • "If I was a mechanic or tow truck operator, I'd be parked between Gainesville and North Dallas to get ready for all these broke down Oklahoma cars on the side of the road. It's gonna be like a snowplow in a blizzard." – John Clay Wolfe ([02:12])
• Neighborhood, economic, and safety jokes about Dallas and Arlington frame the rivalry as much more than a football match.
• John throws open a “hate line” for listeners to vent their regional sports grudges, with playful taunts flying both ways. ([17:11])

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2. Car Dealer Chronicles: Bids, Stories, and Office Drama

• Calls from Listeners:
  • Regulars and newcomers call in trying to sell everything from Ferraris to high-mileage pickups. The cast responds with sharp, sometimes brutal honesty.
  • “I want to be realist. I want to get the truck bought. I can’t be an idiot. So don’t be an idiot. On the other side, if we’ll agree that I’ll be reasonable, and you be reasonable, we’ll get a deal done if you want to sell it.” – John ([71:18])
• Behind the Scenes at GiveMeTheVIN.com:
  • John and manager “Baby Huey” bring in Ed the Buyer—a Bronx native with a complex home life—to face the music over attendance issues, with guest HR arbitrator Ali Siddiq presiding, poking fun at the entire process.
  • “I’m staying with the original deal… No harm, no foul.” – Ali Siddiq ([67:02])

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3. The Ali Siddiq Segments: Comedy That Cuts Deep

• Cultural Observations & Stand-Up Stories
  • Ali lampoons working in Texas, growing up, prison mail, and car-collecting culture, riffing with John and Uncle Roy, turning even routine employment squabbles into comedic gold.
  • The idea for a comedy special in Luckenbach, Texas, is born: “Live from Luckenbach. I mean, that’s the whitest place on the planet… and you do a stand-up in Luckenbach.” – John Clay Wolfe ([85:13])
• HR Negotiations
  • Ali plays mediator, threatening to side with Ed’s prodigious slacking because "his numbers have been good."
  • “See, this is where Ed has a lot of leeway. My numbers have been right. I’ve been getting all my work done in the least amount of time.” – Ali Siddiq ([68:47])

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4. Workplace Absurdities, Food Obsessions, and Car Culture

• “Ed’s” legendary food planning and talent for doing in 30 hours what others complete in 40, all while juggling baby duty and office meal coordination:
  • “He’s got the roster for the lunch special.” ([78:49])
• Dispatch Tales (with Uncle Roy):
  • Stories from the field about mismatched shoes, employee shenanigans, and outright theft of truck wheels are told with colorful, sometimes incredulous detail.
  • “One say Jordan, one say Nike. They look just alike. They look brand new. He played me like a woo wide guitar.” – Uncle Roy ([111:28])

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5. Current Events, Celebrity Impressions & Topical Humor

• Kanye West SNL Rant ([24:20 – 25:01])
  • The team lampoons Kanye’s political rants and the way pop culture and politics merge, with John fast-forwarding when things get “boring.”
• Willie Nelson’s New Song
  • Willie’s “Vote Them Out” inspires bipartisan praise.
  • “That’s great. It’s down the middle. Any side can take that. … I love it.” – John Clay Wolfe ([29:17])
• Rush Limbaugh & Keith Richards Appear (Impression Skits)
  • Faux-call segments with exaggerated Rush and Keith riffs on political drama and music plagiarism lawsuits (Stairway to Heaven vs. Spirit’s “Taurus”), adding comedic interludes.
• DJ Pre K’s Ghetto Quiz & “What Were They On?” Game
  • The crew tests DJ Pre K’s “blackness” in a playful cultural quiz, followed by guessing the substance behind a bizarre news story: “Empty gin bottles in the crash plane… just an old white guy on a damn booze ass bender.” ([132:16])

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6. Race, Stereotypes, and Blunt (But Friendly) Talk

• John and Ali tackle race and cultural divides with humor:
  • “See, everybody wants to think that I’m racist. But I’m not a racist at all. I’m the opposite… You haven’t met my uncle Roy. He’s a 63-year-old black man. I was drinking Mickey’s and smoking cools with this man when I was 10.” – John Clay Wolfe ([91:06])
• On black culture and sports:
  • “Black people have been hiding a gem from us… I went to Daytona… it is a plethora, fellas listen to me, don’t take your wife. It is a plethora of shorts and boots. … And all they do is eat, walk, and jiggle things.” – Ali Siddiq ([92:18])

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7. Listener Feedback: “You Just Lost a Listener”

• The show reads a scathing email criticizing their (allegedly) “dangerous, homophobic, uneducated” content and reflects on outsider perceptions of their humor.
  • “You know, out of all that, I love it… Except the fact you called me lazy.” – John Clay Wolfe ([59:25])
• The crew counters with stories about acceptance, their real-life gay friends, and a defense of context and intent.

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8. Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On car bidding and seller stories:
  • “You know there’s one thing about our listeners, and they do prove this truth: You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.” – John Clay Wolfe ([27:04])
• On tailgating and regional life:
  • “LSU starts their pregame Super Bowl… It’s the Bloody Mary show. That starts at 9:30.” – John Clay Wolfe ([22:06])
• On politics and partisanship:
  • “There’s liberals that would rather be poor than have Trump succeed.” – John Clay Wolfe ([29:38])
• Strip club wisdom:
  • “Waitresses are evil. Especially strip club waitress, ‘cause they take all the money.” – John Clay Wolfe ([52:54])
• On stereotyping and food:
  • “You want your chicken from a guy seven foot one…” (re: Shaq’s chicken chain; everyone groans and laughs) ([137:22])

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Notable Timestamps

• [02:12] – Texas/OU rivalry: mechanics, car jokes
• [05:11] – Bobby’s drug dealing days, legalization talk, weed strains
• [11:36] – Detached retina story; health-related asides
• [17:11] – “Hate line” for Texas/OU open
• [21:59] – Early LSU tailgate and sports talk
• [24:20] – Kanye SNL rant skit
• [29:17] – Willie Nelson “Vote Them Out” reactions
• [44:08] – JD Ryan’s “stealing a monkey” story
• [54:41] – “You Just Lost a Listener” email drama
• [63:00+] – Ali Siddiq joins, Ed’s office/work life discussion
• [84:16] – Ali realizes he’s on “that show,” Luckenbach comedy special idea
• [90:13] – Comedy’s fence-walking on race, “accidental racist” joking
• [102:03] – Celebrity car stories (Beyoncé's dad's Rolls)
• [109:14] – Dispatching mishaps, shoe and wheel theft stories with Uncle Roy
• [126:11] – “How Black Is DJ Pre-K?” segment
• [132:09] – “What Were They On?” game (plane thief: just booze, not drugs)
• [137:22] – Shaq’s fried chicken joint (and shredded black stereotypes)
• [142:35] – Ali Siddiq’s "greatest of all time" comics list

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Tone & Style

The show is sharp-tongued, regional, and approaches taboo, political, and racial subjects with a blend of irreverence, lived experience, and a willingness to offend—if the joke works. The tone is conversational and quick, full of Southern texture, self-mockery, and wit.

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For New Listeners

This episode is a quintessential taste of The John Clay Wolfe Show: unfiltered radio where anything goes as long as it’s FCC-compliant. Expect a blend of car-market insight, sports, regional life, comedy, and unvarnished real talk, punctuated by bits, characters, celebrity impressions, and raucous guest segments.

Main Cast:

• John Clay Wolfe (host, car buyer, and ringmaster)
• J.D. Ryan (sidekick/bidder/foil)
• Bobby Brown, Michael Turley (producers and contributors)
• Uncle Roy (field stories, dry humor)
• Ali Siddiq (guest comedian, HR arbitrator)
• DJ Pre K (music, culture, “How Black?” quiz)

Memorable Moment:
Ali Siddiq on a future “Live from Luckenbach” comedy special ([85:13]) and the recurring stories of car deals gone sideways, office antics, and regional sports hate.

Recommended Segments:
The Ed vs. Huey “attendance hearing” ([63:00–76:00]), Ali Siddiq’s take on black culture and motorsports ([92:18]), and the “You Just Lost a Listener” rebuttal ([54:41–60:36]).

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End of Summary

Transcript

[John Clay Wolf]

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[Radio Announcer]

From the Wolf Radio studios, it's time for the John Clay Wolf show, presented by. Gimme the VI.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hello?

[Radio Announcer]

Yeah, call John toll free 1-800-800 radio. I'm here for the gang bang now, John Clay Wolf.

[J.D. Ryan]

I mean, how are you gonna respond to that?

[Michael Turley]

Seriously? What do you say? Good morning, Bobby Brown.

[J.D. Ryan]

Hey, what do you say, J.D. ryan, the man on left. Yes. Have a right wing guy on your left all the time there. That'll keep you going. What kind of week you having, sir?

[Michael Turley]

It's been a beautiful week. It's been a great week. How about you, sir?

[John Clay Wolf]

Man. All right, all right.

[J.D. Ryan]

I'm okay with it. We are bright, shiny, bushy tail. Say good morning to my friend John Clay. What up?

[John Clay Wolf]

Everybody's playing today, Turley.

[Bobby Brown]

Who's playing today, John? How do you not know? Oh, you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, you in Texas.

[Bobby Brown]

That's right, man.

[Michael Turley]

You walk in and take your shirt off. What the.

[John Clay Wolf]

So they're gonna, they're gonna drive very. They're 200, 000 mile rigs down to Texas to Fair park to.

[Michael Turley]

That's all you can think about.

[John Clay Wolf]

If, if I was a mechanic or a tow truck.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Operator. I would be parked on, you know, between Gainesville and North Dallas.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

On 35 and 75 to get ready for all these broke down Oklahoma cars on the side of the road. So you can help them out. I mean it's going to be like a. A guy that. It's gonna be like a snowplow in a blizzard.

[Bobby Brown]

Yeah, well, those folks in California and Vegas, they don't really know how big of a rival that is and how true of a statement that is too, that these cars will be broken down.

[J.D. Ryan]

Down.

[Michael Turley]

There's a place in North Carolina, it's the Redneck.

[John Clay Wolf]

It's the Meth and Fetiman Bowl. It's the Oklahoma tweakers versus the Texas suckos. Because Texas sucks this year.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's a hard season thus far, isn't it? God dog.

[John Clay Wolf]

What a nice way to say it.

[Bobby Brown]

They're ranked number 19. Who is?

[John Clay Wolf]

Texas.

[Bobby Brown]

Texas Y.

[John Clay Wolf]

Anything can happen on this. This bowl game. Not a bowl game, but it's in the Cotton Ball. Anything can happen. It is in the Cotton Ball, isn't it?

[Caller]

Correct.

[John Clay Wolf]

It has not. When does that happen?

[Bobby Brown]

I don't know. That's one thing that they've not done is move that game to Jerry World. I'm surprised.

[Michael Turley]

That'll be sad.

[John Clay Wolf]

They'll just need one more killing.

[Michael Turley]

Because it's such a tradition of going down to the cotton ball area. For those that don't know it's near downtown Dallas. And you bring a handgun, it's just a great experience.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, it's Oak Cliff in Fair Park. What's that area called right there?

[Michael Turley]

It's called Fair Cliff.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, Fair Park.

[Bobby Brown]

It's.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, it's not really Oak Cliff, but. What's the neighborhood around Fair Park?

[Bobby Brown]

The ghetto.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah. Is that a name?

[Michael Turley]

Okay, yeah. Ghetto.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ghetto Dallas. Coma. South side. Anyway, couple more shootings there, then they'll move it to Jerry World.

[Michael Turley]

Everybody has these.

[John Clay Wolf]

But Arlington will be the ghetto soon enough. Boulevard Arlington will be its own ghetto now.

[Bobby Brown]

They're building that up too now, actually.

[John Clay Wolf]

What? That ghetto.

[Bobby Brown]

They got that Texas live over there. And by Cowboys.

[John Clay Wolf]

Sure, but it's in the ghetto. I mean, when you really get around, whenever you build a bunch of cheap housing in a very fast amount of time.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah. The houses around Jerry World are not nice.

[John Clay Wolf]

No, No. I remember when I was a young man, I was talking to Uncle Roy who was driving. Driving me around at the age of eight. And I said all this new buildings was going up, but you could tell it was cheap. And I was like, isn't this going to be. Will this be the bad part of town one day? He's like, yes. Because it's like trailer parks without wheels is what Arlington's made out of. Yes. Not exactly. I know there's a lot of people.

[Michael Turley]

The reason they could buy all those cheap houses and build that stadium and just bulldoze them. Because they're cheap. They're all just cheap. I know people that bought houses down there and turned them into nothing but party homes for the games.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Michael Turley]

But you know, or they tore it.

[John Clay Wolf]

Down and just brought in trailer park to just mobile Homes. Because they were nicer.

[Michael Turley]

Yes, yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

And then that's what brings the Oklahoma people in. See, it's all about baiting the Oklahoma people. All right, we're getting regional enough. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. If you want to talk about meth, Bobbo's got stories. Oh, wow. Oklahoma. And meth. Baba, when you used to sell weed, how did, like, for. For. What was it, like 85?

[J.D. Ryan]

85 what?

[John Clay Wolf]

When you. When you're a weed man.

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Late 70s. Yeah. Early mid-80s, I think.

[John Clay Wolf]

Like, when you quit doing that job, could you go down to the labor board and collect unemployment? I mean, was it your job?

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, no, no, it's a. It's more of a 1099 form. Private contractor, self employed, kind of. You know what I mean?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

You know, did it.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, what made you quit? Obamacare, like everyone else in the medical world?

[J.D. Ryan]

No, cuz you got to declare, man, they're getting you the subsidies to kill you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, is that it?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's crazy, man. I can't. I can't afford your health care.

[John Clay Wolf]

California's legal. Vegas is legal. Right. Both of those. So did you see that coming? Is that where you got out?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Or why didn't you get a license? Why didn't you go all in?

[J.D. Ryan]

I should have done that. I should have seen that coming. All of our lives.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

Our entire lives.

[John Clay Wolf]

Legalize it. Legalize it. Legalize. They're going to legalize.

[J.D. Ryan]

We got to legalize it someday they're.

[John Clay Wolf]

Going to do it.

[J.D. Ryan]

And I just. I gave up on it, man. I gave up early.

[Michael Turley]

Never quit.

[J.D. Ryan]

And I'll never. I'll never be free of the shame that it's caused me. Giving up on marijuana when I did.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, I'm trying to lighten the blow, you know, with the. With the legalization cross reference so you're not painted in a bad light here.

[J.D. Ryan]

Right.

[John Clay Wolf]

But I'd like to hear the underworld of your life. Back at that time, he was ahead of the curve.

[Uncle Roy]

Really?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah. I mean, you're like Einstein.

[Michael Turley]

Well, here's your dope. Do you mind signing this? 10.99.

[J.D. Ryan]

No, no, no. I appreciate that, really, more than you know, John. You know, I don't like to. To be considered a dumb guy, but I was sure dumb to get out when I did.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know, he's not mad that he did it. He's mad he got out. I love even now, but look at all the.

[J.D. Ryan]

All the players are in there, Willie. You know, our.

[Ali Siddiq]

Our.

[J.D. Ryan]

Our Texas treasurer Willie Nelson is in the pot business. He's got his own strain of of legal marijuana selling in Oklahoma. He's billionaire. You better remember to pay your taxes this time.

[Bobby Brown]

Wait, so Dibaba, did you have your own strand?

[Caller]

No.

[Bobby Brown]

You didn't get that deep?

[J.D. Ryan]

No, we did have a special deal. There was a friend of a friend. It's a long story, but for $3.50 on the quarter pound, we used to get some stuff that the guy swore. Swore came from Antigua on a boat.

[John Clay Wolf]

What difference does that make? Is the air, is the water, is the soil different in Antigua? You sound like my wife now. Everything's better in Denmark. The strawberries are better than Denmark. If we were in Denmark, this would be better. She's from Denmark.

[Michael Turley]

Did that a lot.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh my God.

[Michael Turley]

But the red light here. Boy, the red lights are redder in Denmar.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, then her mom and her. Oh yeah it is. The water's better. The strawberries. This is the way the sea is.

[J.D. Ryan]

And they can make a hell of.

[John Clay Wolf]

A waffle over there. So. So tell me about the. What did you say? Indonesia?

[J.D. Ryan]

Antique.

[John Clay Wolf]

Antigua.

[J.D. Ryan]

Caribbean. Like where's the best coffee come from? Colombia. Yeah, right. Hands down, Starbucks. This stuff was off the hook. And we all know like, okay, you're playing old Mexican dirt weed, basically Indica.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, right.

[J.D. Ryan]

And then there is sensomelia, which generally is always considered from Colombia. But it's not all from Colombia. When you get that really fine red haired, partially crystallized.

[Michael Turley]

Are we talking about coffee now or.

[J.D. Ryan]

No. Spongy. No, this is sticky, beautiful grass.

[Michael Turley]

Grass, okay.

[J.D. Ryan]

You know, and our guys swore that it came on a boat from Antigua.

[Bobby Brown]

Well, that's, that's. That's the kind of stuff that you have in High Times. When they take these photos, they make it like. Oh yeah, this is like. It's almost like porn.

[John Clay Wolf]

To porn.

[Bobby Brown]

Yeah. To weed. Potheads.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, it's popcorn.

[John Clay Wolf]

I read that. I heart radio invested in High Times magazine.

[Bobby Brown]

They're actually. There's commercials that they play on Iheartra.

[John Clay Wolf]

If that's true, then they really need to get off my case. Yeah, well, you know what I mean. What do you mean what you do you know what I mean?

[Bobby Brown]

I agree.

[John Clay Wolf]

But I mean let's just kind of. Huh.

[J.D. Ryan]

Are they messing with you?

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, everybody's messing with me. Always.

[J.D. Ryan]

You want me to go over there.

[John Clay Wolf]

And talk to those guys?

[Michael Turley]

I heart media seeks to light up marijuana market with high time stakes. There. You're right. You know, they invested $10 million in the High Times magazine too. JD this is two days ago.

[John Clay Wolf]

So they're always busting my chops about Wall Street Journal, religion and why and. And doing the right thing. I mean, is that the right thing? Oh, man, everybody's busting my ass all the time. Roy, how are you?

[Uncle Roy]

Good. You?

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm good. Good, good, good, good. Speaking of marijuana, remember when we were on the job sites and your. Your partners were rolling their own? Oh, yeah. What was that all about? Why black men roll their own cigarettes.

[Uncle Roy]

Well, I think it's kind of ghetto. It's a little bit cheap.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cheaper.

[Michael Turley]

Okay, that makes sense.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so it's a. It's a. It's a monetary thing. I thought it was a taste thing or a I'm cool thing.

[Uncle Roy]

No, no, no, it's cheap.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cheap.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, cheap.

[John Clay Wolf]

So what, what, you just buy a bucket, a tin of tobacco?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah. You buy a can of tobacco and.

[John Clay Wolf]

Then you get your papers.

[Uncle Roy]

Then you know you got three or four hundred cigarettes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Three, four, six dollars.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah. Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

For how much?

[Uncle Roy]

About six bucks back in the day.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, the bobo. I mean, you've. You've been efficient in your years before. Have you ever.

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh, yeah, I rolled my own for like a year and a half. One bag of Bugler. Yeah, they come with papers right inside. Yeah, that's not enough for 600 cigarettes, but I bet you get 40.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, but, you know, they. The favorite kind was Prince Albert.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Huh.

[John Clay Wolf]

And so Bugler, Prince Albert.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Was that like a ghetto type of. I mean, is that. Is that different? Is it like malt liquor, tobacco, cheap tobacco?

[Uncle Roy]

They smokes it during the weekend, and they buy them a pack of Winston Coos on the weekend.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ah, now why is that?

[Ali Siddiq]

Well, they got.

[Uncle Roy]

They can afford Winston and Cools for two days.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah. Unless you want to look cool in front of the ladies on the weekend.

[John Clay Wolf]

So if you're going out, you got filter cigarettes.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah. But when you're working, you got. You roll your own.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ah, see, you learned something here. This is an educational show, everyone.

[Michael Turley]

You didn't learn anything today, kids.

[John Clay Wolf]

Little Nuggets by Uncle Roy. What are y' all doing today? Y' all going out to pick up cars?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, yeah, we got a few to pick up.

[John Clay Wolf]

You got them all over.

[Uncle Roy]

All over the place. My girl was off from work one day and that. Throw those behind.

[John Clay Wolf]

Who? Frank Or a driver. Jennifer.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

How's Frankie's eyes? Huh? How's Frankie's eyes? Do you know?

[Uncle Roy]

I don't know. I ain't seen him.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yeah, we had a. A key employee she had to rush the hospital because a detached retina.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, I had that about three months ago, remember?

[John Clay Wolf]

You did? Yes. Oh, that's right.

[Michael Turley]

Yes, I did. I had emergency.

[John Clay Wolf]

I thought you were just making stuff.

[Michael Turley]

Up, making it up.

[John Clay Wolf]

You had emergency surgery? Yes. How long were you out?

[Michael Turley]

Literally, they do it.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's.

[Michael Turley]

It's Lasik. They did it in the office the next morning. I went in on a Monday. They brought me in Monday afternoon. Michael knows.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, I was up here. I was up with these big dark.

[Michael Turley]

Sunglasses on, my eyes. Dilated.

[John Clay Wolf]

Holy God.

[J.D. Ryan]

Detached retina.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, it sounds bad.

[Michael Turley]

I'm not walking the dog. You know what? I asked that same question. He goes, well, have you been in a car wreck? I went, well, a couple years ago. He goes, no, that's not it. It just happens. It just happens. I'm out walking the dog, and you start seeing little stars, and you think, what is that? And then it starts turning dark, and then it looks spider webs over your eye. And I'm like, holy mackerels. I rushed to the doctor, and that's what it was.

[John Clay Wolf]

Roy, are y' all picking up anything cool this morning? Forgive me, the vin.

[Uncle Roy]

Say it again.

[John Clay Wolf]

Are y' all picking up anything cool or special this morning?

[Uncle Roy]

No, nothing special.

[John Clay Wolf]

Forgive me, the vintage cars.

[Uncle Roy]

Nothing special.

[John Clay Wolf]

Just normal.

[Michael Turley]

Where's the McLaren you have.

[Uncle Roy]

We got some good stuff out at Marich. We're going to pick it up.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cool. Nothing. We just don't talk when we're buying out of dealerships. We don't talk about the. The accounts that we have on the radio. But that's why Charlie dumped it. So we got some good, good, good merch at that Chevy house that we're going to pick up. That's cool.

[Michael Turley]

So what was the cool car of the week? Was there a neat one?

[John Clay Wolf]

McLaren. Did you drive that McLaren, Roy?

[Uncle Roy]

No.

[John Clay Wolf]

I did. It was nice.

[Uncle Roy]

I didn't even drive a bedline yesterday. It was laughing here.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Nah, man.

[Bobby Brown]

He doesn't like driving the sports car.

[John Clay Wolf]

I don't either. I don't either, but last week I took a Ferrari for a day, and I took a McLaren for a day.

[Michael Turley]

And your kids.

[John Clay Wolf]

I was glad I did.

[Uncle Roy]

Now if it Mercedes, you know. You know, I got in that one. But that vet.

[John Clay Wolf]

I n. You don't give a damn. You've been there, done that.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Nothing but trouble.

[Uncle Roy]

I don't want no speak no more.

[John Clay Wolf]

You don't like your whiskey and your women? 20 years old?

[Uncle Roy]

No, no, I just kind of.

[John Clay Wolf]

That old vet we had didn't make any money. The 80s, the old 76. You know, those cars are hit and miss. That stingray, that body style they just hadn't hooked on. Some people care. It's like 10,000 is the most they can be with 20,000 miles and as good as, you know. But like. But everybody's like, I want 10,000. Guess we're three. They're like, you're crazy. Okay. And we went and gave 6,500 for this one and it looked pretty nice and sold it for five. Yeah, lose two GS on it after expenses. Because I started listening to somebody whistling in my ear telling me something about what I already knew. I started listening. That's the problem. I started listening to this guy's story and he talked me into it. And I knew better. My guilt was good. No, man, you need to give the guy 5. Give him 65, shut him up, Bam. I mean, what could I have done with $2,000? A hell of a lot more than sell a rattly ass old Corvette. My name is John Clay Wolf and I buy cars on the radio. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Be.

[Radio Announcer]

Broadcasting live from the Wolf radio studios. It's time for the John Clay Wolf show.

[John Clay Wolf]

This ain't nothing, friends.

[Ali Siddiq]

This is not business.

[John Clay Wolf]

What the hell does that have to do with the price of tea in China?

[Radio Announcer]

Hit them up now. 800-800-Radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you're topless, they will pay $10 a beer.

[Radio Announcer]

Now, John Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

$10 to be our own son of a. Finally made it through to the executive headquarters at Natural Light.

[Michael Turley]

Isn't that amazing?

[John Clay Wolf]

The world's largest son of a. And he took our idea and he. And he made it happen.

[Michael Turley]

Yep.

[John Clay Wolf]

And damn him for doing it. Thank goodness somebody did it.

[Michael Turley]

You're talking about the big multi packs.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, yeah. You know, it was the party ball in 1993. It was the keg in 1950. But the son of a pulled one out of his rear. Tell us about it.

[Michael Turley]

Seven pack. A 77 pack of beer. Nag lights.

[John Clay Wolf]

They've just released Natty Lights. J.D. you're mumbling.

[Michael Turley]

I said Natty Light. It weighs 65 pounds. And by the way, you can only pick this up in College Park, Maryland for now. They're only starting it in one college town.

[John Clay Wolf]

It's a stone college, isn't it?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, probably. One can only assume if things go well, they'll be more available very soon.

[Bobby Brown]

How much?

[Michael Turley]

How much is it? How much does it weigh?

[John Clay Wolf]

How much it costs?

[Michael Turley]

Oh, it didn't say how much it costs?

[John Clay Wolf]

I think it's probably 15.99 for 70.

[Ali Siddiq]

70.

[John Clay Wolf]

For 65 pounds of beer?

[Michael Turley]

77. Beer.

[John Clay Wolf]

Comes with a urinal in a bag.

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh, man.

[John Clay Wolf]

Comes with a catheter package and a.

[Michael Turley]

Barf bag like the airliner.

[John Clay Wolf]

For $140, you get the plug in catheter where you just keep rolling. Never Turn it off. 8008-007234-80080. Radio Guy and Alvin, good morning. 16 challenger scat pack with 46,000 miles. It's a RT, not a SRT, right? Alvin, hello. 16 challenger scat pack. What color? Can you hear me? Your name is Guy, correct?

[Caller]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Can you hear me?

[Caller]

Hello?

[John Clay Wolf]

Can you hear me?

[Caller]

I can barely hear you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Are you on speaker phone?

[Caller]

Yeah, I'm in my car. Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, it's not working well, so do this. Go to. Give me the VIN. Give me the VIN.com, load your car up and we'll get right back to you and bid it. That goes for anybody else. And you can just put in your license plate number two if you don't have your VIN number and it'll bust it. 800-800-723-48008. NRA. Okay, so Texas ou weekend. I know we're all over the country, but guys, you got to understand and appreciate the love for the hate between Texas and Oklahoma this weekend.

[Michael Turley]

Been going on a long time.

[John Clay Wolf]

The love of the hate, love of the hate. So if you have hate from either side of the Red river that you'd like to share, go. I'd like to open the lines up for the hate.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, no.

[John Clay Wolf]

8008-0072-3480-0800 Raiders.

[Michael Turley]

The hate line, like Facebook hadn't been bad enough this week.

[John Clay Wolf]

The Texas. Oh, you hate line. If you like to call in old zero use up there from Oklahoma, going to call in and throw a little mud, little cow mud at us Texans and Austin, Dallas, Fort Worthy and Houston's, you know, UT alums, if you'd like to do the same. You're live and local and Oklahoma City and Norman right now.

[Bobby Brown]

It's fascinating.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're on in Austin, so I'm giving you a platform to hate on each other. I mean, very open. I mean, what's fascinating, Mike?

[Bobby Brown]

Well, just, you know, from when I moved here from Connecticut, being a Yankee and seeing Jewish.

[Uncle Roy]

Yankee.

[Bobby Brown]

No, not Jewish, but just seeing that Oklahoma, Texas, the whole thing, you're like, okay, what's the big deal? What's the big deal? Then you go down and The Friday nights they go down to Dallas. They're going back and forth with it. It actually becomes. Okay, I get it. I get the whole idea. And of the hate, of the hate between the two.

[Michael Turley]

It's been going on for.

[John Clay Wolf]

But why the hate?

[Bobby Brown]

Why there's a hate. Well, that starts way back.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, you see, you get it. Explain it to us. Teach me about the hate, Daddy.

[Bobby Brown]

Teach you?

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, there's nothing to teach you. I want to embrace the hate.

[Bobby Brown]

You got to go 800.

[John Clay Wolf]

800 radio. Spread the hate.

[Ali Siddiq]

Do what you've not.

[Bobby Brown]

You haven't gone down to the West End back in the day when they had the.

[Michael Turley]

When I was in high school, I went down there.

[Bobby Brown]

That's where you go down there and you get you a little girl down.

[John Clay Wolf]

There, too, maybe, you know, get you a little girl. That sounds pedophilia. That'll be the Oklahoma side.

[Michael Turley]

All week it's been like, hey, you can't spell douche without ou.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, you can't spell what? Your mumbling again.

[Michael Turley]

I'm not gonna say that again. I was trying to get it by you. But anyway, it's spelled.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm not gonna say you can't spell Summer's Eve or Mass and Gill without. Oh, yeah, there you go.

[Michael Turley]

There you go. And there's a lot of other Texan ones, too.

[J.D. Ryan]

So what's the line on the game?

[Bobby Brown]

Ou's favored by 7 and a half.

[J.D. Ryan]

7 and a half?

[Michael Turley]

What keeps Texas from falling off into the Gulf?

[John Clay Wolf]

OU sucks.

[Michael Turley]

Thank you very much.

[John Clay Wolf]

Michael. Would you like to put a wager? $20 on. I will take the fact that OU will beat Texas for more than a line. Anybody would like to cover that.

[Bobby Brown]

Where are we moving this line to seven?

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, the posted Vegas line. The men in Vegas are professionals, just like we are professionals at bidding cars and offering setting the line for the used car market. That's. I'm the Ace Rothstein of the used car market. I set the line right. Brian in Oklahoma City. Good morning.

[Caller]

Good morning.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hi.

[Caller]

Hey. Just wanted to see what Randy the Chipmunk where he was laying his money on.

[John Clay Wolf]

Randy. Get your little stoned ass over here. Come here. Come here.

[Michael Turley]

Hop up on the chair.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, that's a dog. You whistled a dog, not a chipmunk.

[Uncle Roy]

Hey, guys.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hey. Now you whistle, too. We got great hearing in Chipmunk. You had to know that, right? Seven and a half. That's the Vegas. That's the sports seven and a half.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, you and seven and a half. And you bet at all. These are You. Are you a bookie? Which one is it?

[John Clay Wolf]

No, I don't book. I don't make books.

[Michael Turley]

You don't make book?

[John Clay Wolf]

What are you accusing me that for? I'm not accusing. Hang on, hang on. Y' all are getting off the rail. I got a guy here that wants to know how Randy's betting I didn't take the lie. Boomer. Sinners. You think? Oh, he's going to blow the line out. Yeah. Don't try anything fancy here. I know you're gonna. Now you know. Oh, I love Longhorns. I love. I love Texas W game. It's gonna be awesome. Yeah, yeah. Don't do it.

[Michael Turley]

Don't get passionate about the.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, yeah.

[Uncle Roy]

Just.

[John Clay Wolf]

Just stick with the line animation. Yeah.

[Uncle Roy]

Take shooters and seven and a half.

[John Clay Wolf]

They're gonna cover. It's gonna be all right, Brian. You got all that?

[Caller]

I got it.

[John Clay Wolf]

Thank you. Thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. Eli, what city in.

[Caller]

I am a Sooner fan. I'm here in Texas working and I just wanted to cheer my Sooners on.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Good job. Robert and Mesquite. Good morning, Robert. Mesquite. How you doing? I'm good. How are you? Yeah. Giga. Maggie.

[Caller]

Who hates what I hate both teams.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm an Aggie. Yeah. How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

[Caller]

It only takes one educated one.

[John Clay Wolf]

Three. One to undo the light bulb, one to hold the light bulb and the other to light the bottom of it to get the meth out of it. 800. That's Oklahoma joke. Is it? 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. My name's John Clay Wolf.

[J.D. Ryan]

You burn it. You burn it.

[John Clay Wolf]

You're burning. I'll do it.

[Radio Announcer]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show. Hit him up right now. 1, 800, 800 radio. This is the John Clay Wolf show.

[John Clay Wolf]

Baton Rouge is off in 9:30 this morning. Is that right for a. Yeah, LSU game?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

Their pre game starts at 9:30am well.

[John Clay Wolf]

This is a Louisiana thing. They start everything early and they drink a lot of game starts. Probably seven. It's close. 2:30. That's a hell of a pregame show. They start their pregame Super Bowl. It's. It's the Bloody Mary show. That starts at 9:30.

[Bobby Brown]

Offensive coordinator show. And then you got your receivers coach show.

[John Clay Wolf]

Non stop.

[Michael Turley]

It's like a Saturday night Jimmy Buffett concert really starts on Thursday. It really does.

[Ali Siddiq]

It does.

[John Clay Wolf]

Who would listen to all that? A lot of people, I think. A lot of people. Yeah. I mean not Me, but a lot of others. Gerard and Houston, good morning. And I'm a Lions fan. Lions.

[J.D. Ryan]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, Tigers. The hell's wrong with me? I was thinking of the Cowboy game last week that I went to. That was good. That was a. That was a nail biter at the end. Yeah, I mean, Zeke looked good. He looked great. Dak looked okay. And Cowboys, you know, beat the team that beat the Patriots. It's like, my grandma could beat your grandma kind of deal.

[J.D. Ryan]

Right.

[John Clay Wolf]

So I think it's just all up. Gerald in Houston. Good morning. You're on the air. Is my phone not working? Right. Jared, Houston. Houston, you there? Explorer. Hello. Hello? Bye. Just go to givemetheven.com somebody call in and check this phone. Something's up. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. So, Rush Limbaugh.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, Rush.

[John Clay Wolf]

Where the hell is he?

[Bobby Brown]

Hold on, I gotta dial him up.

[John Clay Wolf]

It takes.

[Bobby Brown]

He's sleeping, probably.

[Michael Turley]

It's almost 10 o' clock there. So he should be up. He really should be by now.

[John Clay Wolf]

We can get to him in a minute.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Just.

[John Clay Wolf]

Just call him, get him lined up for the next segment. Okay, That'll be fine. But I do want to hear about Kanye West. I noticed you want to talk about it, and I didn't want to talk about it anyway.

[Michael Turley]

You don't want to talk.

[John Clay Wolf]

I didn't, but I wanted to wait till the air.

[Michael Turley]

Okay. After his final Saturday Night Live performance, Kanye west stayed on stage. That's just. They're saying because he offended the audience. Anyway, stayed on camera. He addressed the audience about a variety of subjects. You know how he does it, tends to pontificate, including a little bit of a pro Trump hat he was wearing and a little bit of a pro Trump speech he was sending out the airwaves. Do we have that audio?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

You see, they laughing at me.

[J.D. Ryan]

You heard them.

[John Clay Wolf]

They scream at me. They bullied me. They bullied me backstage. They said, don't go out there with that hat on. They bullied me backstage. They bullied me.

[J.D. Ryan]

Sound of one hand clapping, and they.

[John Clay Wolf]

Say, I'm in a sunken place. You want to see the sunken place? Okay, I'm gonna listen to y' all now. I'm gonna put my Superman cape on, because this means you can't tell me what to do. Follow your heart and stop following your mind. That's how we're controlled. That's how we're programmed.

[J.D. Ryan]

Amen.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you want the world to move forward, try. All right, all right. It's boring. You get the idea. DJ you gott on hold so I can bring him to the air. Remember that, his performance.

[Bobby Brown]

I watched the show.

[Ali Siddiq]

Did you?

[John Clay Wolf]

Hey, where are you calling from? Hello, you're on the air. He just sucks.

[Bobby Brown]

Really? Yeah, he's just not good.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hello? It's you. Where you calling from? Amel, how's it sound?

[Caller]

Stanley?

[John Clay Wolf]

Hi, Stanley. How does it sound?

[Caller]

Doesn't sound very good. It sounds kind of.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, gosh. The. The phone is hard to hear.

[Caller]

Yep.

[John Clay Wolf]

What are you driving, like a 78 Ford?

[Caller]

Very close.

[John Clay Wolf]

All right. He sounds like. He sounds like that guy from the Stern show. Richard Christie. What he'd call my grandson. He's a. He's a heavy boy. We'd like to know what y' all have on the buffet today.

[Ali Siddiq]

That mashed potatoes.

[John Clay Wolf]

800. 800. 73 4. Houston, 2012 explorer. Can you hear me now?

[Caller]

Yes, sir.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. 31,000 miles. What color is.

[Caller]

Is a. The metallic gray.

[John Clay Wolf]

And it's navigation and sunroof.

[Caller]

Navigation, sunroof. Limited package.

[John Clay Wolf]

19. 19 grand. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hang on a second. Average MMR is 15. Eight. What buys it?

[Caller]

What buys it?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah. Do you know what you need for it right now?

[Caller]

21.

[John Clay Wolf]

And where are you coming up with that number?

[Caller]

Off the top of my head.

[Uncle Roy]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm thinking upper teens. Are you serious?

[Caller]

Say that again.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm thinking upper teens. Upper teens, like 16, 17. 16, 17, 18.

[Caller]

Like 19. Like 19, 9.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know, there's one thing about our listeners, and they do prove this truth. You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning.

[Caller]

I'll tell you what. Yeah, you gotta look. Hey. And she's walking out now, and it's her car that I'm selling.

[John Clay Wolf]

Tell me the story. That's what it's all about. The story. Screw the car. What about the woman? What'd she do? She always was kind of a wide stance gal.

[Caller]

He doesn't. She doesn't like OU Or. Or Texas.

[John Clay Wolf]

And she's. Are y' all splitting up? Is she leaving you? Did you catch her cheating? Did she make it back with her old high school man that she met up on Facebook? The preacher. What's going on in your life?

[Caller]

Well, what happened was she went to a M. And. And you know that. That was the beginning of the end.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, Caleb, how's the phone? How did the phone sound?

[Caller]

It sounds all right from where I'm at.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, well, you're an Amarillo also.

[Caller]

I don't know what Stanley was talking about, but it sounds pretty good.

[John Clay Wolf]

Big shout out to Stanley.

[Michael Turley]

The problem was on Stanley and the.

[John Clay Wolf]

Massey Ferguson open cab tractor plowing this morning.

[Caller]

Good God. All I could think of was wrong. Turn three is some banjo somewhere.

[John Clay Wolf]

800. I don't know what the hell Stanley was talking about. 800-800-72348. 800.

[Michael Turley]

Listeners turning on listeners.

[John Clay Wolf]

Radio. Oh, God almighty. So Willie's got a catchy new tune. I did hear this. Do you like it, Turley?

[Bobby Brown]

Yeah, actually, it's not bad for playing.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you don't like who's in there, vote them out. That's what election day is all about. And the biggest gun we got called the ballot box. If you don't like who's in there, vote them out. So this is what got him rich and famous. Yeah. Vote them out. And when they're gone, we'll sing and dance and shout. So bring some new ones in and they will start to show again. And if you don't like who's in there, vote them out.

[Bobby Brown]

I mean, that's. That's great. It's down the middle. Anybody. Any side can take.

[Michael Turley]

Any side can take that.

[John Clay Wolf]

You're right. That's. It's absolutely perfect. Yeah.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

I love it. I think we need to play that during every segment. I'm so tired of all these crazy wackos that have just gone. There's liberals that would rather be poor.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yep.

[John Clay Wolf]

Than have Trump succeed.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yep.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah. Crazy.

[John Clay Wolf]

Because they don't like the. You know, his physical policy is actually working and the economy's doing great. So it really makes them mad because they hate Trump so bad. And they would rather be poor. They would rather like their stocks be worth half.

[Ali Siddiq]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

Than to have this work. It's the damnedest thing I've seen in a long time. And I. You know, politics is in one ear out the other. It's just background noise in a sense, because everybody's. You know, when I was a kid, I didn't. I. I think it was the same thing. I just wasn't listening. And I'm trying not to listen now.

[Michael Turley]

That's the best thing you can do is not listen.

[John Clay Wolf]

But don't vote. The. The hardcore lips, I mean, they really get fired up.

[J.D. Ryan]

Dude, the hardcores on both ends are driving me nuts. And, you know, I watch this kind of thing very closely.

[Bobby Brown]

I agree.

[John Clay Wolf]

The. The conservative hardcores are obnoxious, too.

[J.D. Ryan]

You know, you get Ted Nugent and Amy Schumer on a stage together.

[Michael Turley]

Wouldn't that be great?

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh, man, they need to have a.

[Michael Turley]

Child pay to see that.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, you need to have a child. A drug induced guitar playing.

[Michael Turley]

Ted doesn't do drugs.

[John Clay Wolf]

Joke telling, Chip child. We have Uncle Ted on the show every once. But he's crazy as an S house rat.

[Michael Turley]

Of course he is.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, just goofy or run over dog. That's pretty goofy.

[Michael Turley]

That's pretty goofy.

[John Clay Wolf]

800-800-7234 CJ. A 16 Dodge Dart with 79, 000 miles worth. $4,000.

[Caller]

What? I'm sorry.

[John Clay Wolf]

4 to $5,000.

[Caller]

That's sad.

[John Clay Wolf]

I know. I bet your payoff's 12, 3.

[Caller]

What was that?

[John Clay Wolf]

I bet your payoff is 12, 3.

[Caller]

I wish it was. It's more than that. That's really sad part.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, have you ever thought about just letting it go back? You know these finance companies that overcharge and charge high interest, they're used to getting them back.

[Caller]

Yeah, I've thought about it. I've never done it before, but I'm at a point in the mileage where I'm like, I got to do something.

[John Clay Wolf]

Who is your lien holder?

[Caller]

Prestige Financial.

[John Clay Wolf]

I think we get them on the phone. Oh, no, I love Clay. He's a friend of mine. I gotta be careful on this one. Say, hey, I'm not gonna come see Clay, but I'm gonna let the car come see you. 800-800-723-4. 800.

[J.D. Ryan]

Radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

13 grand. What'd you say? 16 grand payoff? Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's a little tough, Pat. Louisiana. 1200, 143 on the clock average rough or clean. Pat in Louisiana, you there?

[Caller]

Oh.

[John Clay Wolf]

Are you, Pat? Pat, are you there?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, well, what city in Louisiana are you in?

[Uncle Roy]

I live in Luck, Louisiana.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, if I'm in Houston or Dallas or San Francisco, I'm listening to this show just to hear these people. Yes. From these different places, these accents. I don't know what.

[Michael Turley]

Stan.

[John Clay Wolf]

You can't make it up, Pat. Tell me about it, baby. How'd you get so many miles on? And first of all, Pat, how are you driving a two wheel drive truck in the state of Louisiana and they have not revoked your hunting license?

[Caller]

Hey, that's why I want to get out. I want to give me a four wheel drive.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm about an eight thousand dollar buyer on this thing. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Okay.

[Caller]

All right, I'll take it to you. I'm driving right now.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, just take a couple pictures. You can put the license plate and give me the vin.com text. Seriously, before 60 seconds is up. You'll be done. It takes nothing. 800-800-7234. Michael and Beaumont. A 12 express van. Is it conversion?

[Caller]

No, it's just stock. With the, with the bench seating, you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Know, passenger van, it's between 10 and $20,000. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Let's take a look. That's a ridiculous range because I don't want to ask all the questions. I'd rather just have the VIN number, the pictures and know what the hell we're doing. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. Remember, just go to givemethevin.com if we don't beat your CarMax off of there. If you have a written CarMax offer, take a picture, send it to us. Give us a chance to beat it. If we don't beat it, we'll send you a check for a hundred dollars so you'll definitely make money. It takes 45 seconds, 60 seconds to load it up. We'll be back with our number two.

[J.D. Ryan]

Ah, these tree hugging yuppies and their stupid dang nab electric cars. Back my day you'd get a ethyl burning little beauty that get you four miles to the gallon. And we didn't have power brakes for a damn robot girly to bitch at you for making a wrong turn. We didn't even have a seat belts. Anything happen and you go straight through the damn windshield. One minute you're cruising on the turnpike and the next. Live from Dallas, Texas, it's Saturday morning. It's the John Clay Wolf show starring John Clay Wolf with J.D. ryan, Michael Turley and Bobby Brown. And featuring DJ Free K, Rush Limbo, Randy the Chipmunk, Keith Richards and special guest comedian Ali Sadiq. And now your host, John Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ali is coming on today.

[J.D. Ryan]

Coming on today.

[John Clay Wolf]

I didn't know that was today. I thought it was next week.

[Ali Siddiq]

He'll be here.

[John Clay Wolf]

When's Eddie Griffin?

[J.D. Ryan]

Eddie plays. Is it not next week, but two weeks I believe. At the Improv in Dallas, we went.

[John Clay Wolf]

To, we had Charlie Murphy. He died, right? Yeah, poor child, him years ago. And Babo and I went to the show and it's like a local and I dropped, I dropped his punchline at the end like he was teeing up for big punchline.

[Michael Turley]

You did?

[John Clay Wolf]

And I said it was Aunt Bunny. He stopped because I thought I was. I wasn't trying to steal it. I just thought it was like sing along.

[J.D. Ryan]

No, you know the Eddie Murphy bit, right? About Aunt sure and goona goo goo and all that. So Charlie has a story where it's a really sweet thing. He's talking about his little daughter, who was probably one year old at the time. And she's stroking his face and said, daddy, what's this? And that's a mustache, honey. And it, you know, it's quiet and it's touching and the crowd's really getting into it.

[John Clay Wolf]

He was long, lead up voice of.

[J.D. Ryan]

Voice of John Clay Wolf in a silent, dark room. And Bunny had a mustache.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is that what I said?

[J.D. Ryan]

And Charlie gave that Eddie Murphy look. He looked sideways and looked right at John. I thought, oh, God, here he goes.

[John Clay Wolf]

We got the hell out of Dodge.

[J.D. Ryan]

If I remember correctly, Charlie Murphy's gonna beat our asses.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, my God.

[John Clay Wolf]

Why would you. I mean, I was just. I mean, we'd become friends with him. He'd been in the studio earlier that day. We went to his gig. We were. We were all homeboys. I thought it was a sing along. I thought it was like Campfire Man.

[Ali Siddiq]

I just can't help it.

[John Clay Wolf]

But I was the only white guy in the camp.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, you're the only one that ruined this joke.

[John Clay Wolf]

No. And they all looked at me like. Yeah, I felt. I felt like the guys from Trilams at the Dexter Lake Club and Animal House. Where are all the white women at?

[Michael Turley]

Can we dance with your day?

[John Clay Wolf]

It was no good. I. I boogied on out. 8008-0072-3480-0800-RADIO. Speaking of funny guys and radio personalities, where the hell's Rush Limbaugh? Get him on the phone. I love this guy.

[Bobby Brown]

Rush, dial it up on the ISDN line from Florida.

[J.D. Ryan]

John?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

I'm glad you're there. I was worried, you know, I was on here before. Could you not hear me?

[Michael Turley]

No, we couldn't.

[J.D. Ryan]

That's probably a good thing.

[Michael Turley]

Why?

[J.D. Ryan]

I was swearing.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, really?

[J.D. Ryan]

Watching. Watching the tv.

[Michael Turley]

What are you watching?

[J.D. Ryan]

These sneaky, calculated maneuverings of the liberal Democrats never cease to amaze me. You'd be all twisted and true story.

[Michael Turley]

What?

[J.D. Ryan]

It occurred to me just this morning over coffee and a delicious Percocet or three. This whole Supreme Court fiasco is nothing but a diversionary tactic.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, by the left, it is.

[J.D. Ryan]

I mean, look.

[Michael Turley]

What?

[J.D. Ryan]

It's not like an election or a good old men's restroom sex scandal.

[John Clay Wolf]

What?

[J.D. Ryan]

It's a nomination to the Supreme Court. It's not sexy.

[Michael Turley]

No, but it's a big deal.

[J.D. Ryan]

Why is everybody paying so much attention to this thing?

[Michael Turley]

Because he's gonna make laws for the next 10 decades.

[J.D. Ryan]

Well, the Supreme Court justices don't make laws, they interpret them. It's not the end of the world.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, my God.

[J.D. Ryan]

Democrats. So what do you do?

[Michael Turley]

It breaks down to Roe versus Wade.

[J.D. Ryan]

What do you do? If you're the Democrats, you get the drive by media all tattered and shrieking over a possibly questionable nominee to draw attention from the fact that, and I really believe this, that they're grooming a presidential candidate for 2020, and that's what we should be worried about. I didn't even see this biggest thing about it. If the Democrats ever figure out that they just can't get a loser of a chump elected, they get somebody good, like Tom Hanks in there. I've heard rumors.

[John Clay Wolf]

I could see that.

[J.D. Ryan]

I heard it first here on the Excellence in Broadcasting Network Classics.

[John Clay Wolf]

What about Arnold? Was he Republican?

[J.D. Ryan]

He was. Well, he called himself Republican. He couldn't say Republican.

[John Clay Wolf]

What did he say?

[J.D. Ryan]

But he had it written there next to his name. Governor Schwarzenegger.

[Michael Turley]

I just said President Trump. Ten years ago. He was throwing me out of the studio.

[J.D. Ryan]

I've been doing this at parties for years. Here's my Schwarzenegger impersonation.

[Ali Siddiq]

Right?

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, sure, he would. He wouldn't say Republican. He'd say. That's pretty good, huh? Pretty good. I bet you didn't know I could do that.

[Michael Turley]

I thought it was Arnold.

[John Clay Wolf]

When I was in Los Angeles a week ago, I saw him working out with his son's gym on Santa Monica.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, he's a really big bastard.

[John Clay Wolf]

And John Claude's down there, too. You would think Sly Stallone's brothers down there. And they're all little guys.

[Ed (Buyer)]

I know, they're all.

[John Clay Wolf]

John Claude's a little guy. Yeah, but Arn's not that tall. No, his son looks just like him. But God, I mean, he was such a nice guy. Everywhere I went, he was cleaning up behind me, his son. He was wiping the counters. He was sweeping the floors.

[Uncle Roy]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

You don't get it. No, because his mama was the maid. You guys need to wake up. It is not that late.

[Michael Turley]

Got it?

[John Clay Wolf]

It is not. Took me a second.

[Michael Turley]

You would just think Arnold and those people would have their own gyms.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's true, though. If you watch Castaway, that movie. Castaway? Yeah. There are clues all over the place.

[Michael Turley]

Really?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

You better take a. Take a closer look at Wilson. Okay, the volleyball next time you watch. I'm telling you, I'm telling you, the way he falls off the boat and Tom is all unhinged.

[John Clay Wolf]

Right. 800, 800. 7, 2 3, 4. You know, I was talking to someone about the demographics of San Diego today. La Jolla and all that. This is supposed to be, like, the wealthiest area, most expensive area in the United States.

[J.D. Ryan]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

We've been on the air there for, like, six weeks now on KIOZ. And I haven't bid or bought a. Anything over $50,000 yet. So all this is a shout out to the rich folks. All you rich folks. If you want to sell your car, we want to buy it. Those California supercars, the Lambos, the Porsches, the Ferraris, the heavy stuff, the exotics, the McLarens. We buy those and we will come to you and pick them up. I picked up a Tesla and Pacific Palisades the other day, but nothing in San Diego. Picked up a Ferrari Italia in Los Angeles the other day, but not in San Diego. We got a McLaren in Vegas, but not in San Diego. What's wrong with San Diego? Are the rich people not rocking? Is that the deal? Are they not listening to the rock station? Do we need to be on the. On the classical station? On strings, On.

[Bobby Brown]

Oh, no, no.

[John Clay Wolf]

On the symphony station. What's going on?

[Bobby Brown]

I think they're more of a classic rock type of guy. They're not so much a Green Day guy.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, tattooed people listen to us down in San Diego. If you have rich friends that listen to the classic rock station, tell them about us. Swing by their cars because we like the heavy stuff. And that goes for everywhere. Texas, Oklahoma, Louisiana. You know, one of the nice. The biggest car I ever bought was in Louisiana.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Really?

[J.D. Ryan]

Yep.

[Michael Turley]

What was it?

[John Clay Wolf]

It's a special car. I don't even talk about.

[Michael Turley]

You should bring it up.

[John Clay Wolf]

Alexis. Lfa. But the, you know, some of these smaller markets have these, you know, wealthy, wealthy oil guys. They have some heavy, heavy, heavy iron. They're out there and we like it. 800-807-234. And we buy the normal. We buy normal cars all day. It's fun to have the big stuff.

[Ali Siddiq]

Good morning.

[John Clay Wolf]

You're on the air. Hello? You're on the air. What the hell's wrong with my phones? Hello? Can you hear me?

[Bobby Brown]

They're just not up.

[John Clay Wolf]

Who's not up?

[Bobby Brown]

The phone. I don't hear anything in the background.

[John Clay Wolf]

I see him. D.J. get them loaded. Gerald in Houston, you called earlier. You were drunk. You were talking about your old lady. Your explorer now has 106,000 miles on it. When you called in an hour ago, it had 12. Are you there?

[Caller]

No, hers. Hers has 31,000. Mine has 100.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, but you don't want to talk about. You don't want. You don't want to talk about Explorers. You're just setting me up for a punchline about Texas ou. And that's fine. Just hit me with it.

[Caller]

No, I'm not. I'm not hitting you up. I'm trying to sell. I'm trying to sell an Explorer today.

[John Clay Wolf]

Which one? Hers or yours?

[Caller]

Whichever one you want to buy.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, well, just go to givemetheven.com and load them both up. Just load them both up. We'll buy them both. 800.

[J.D. Ryan]

Whichever one you want to buy.

[John Clay Wolf]

He's just. He's just a partier dude.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, he wants to get on the radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

Everybody's just a party. Start tailgating early if you can't drink all day, if you don't start in the morning.

[Michael Turley]

Just got his 70.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's why the LSU pregame show starts at 9:30. You're right.

[J.D. Ryan]

You know, I was telling Connie, our office comptroller manager yesterday about that. You know, back in the day when I was here, my girlfriend quit me. This is before my son came to live with me.

[Michael Turley]

I can't quit you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is this the one that we were talking about the other day?

[J.D. Ryan]

I used to drink a bottle of rum a day and not good rum. Rico Bay, the little Vietnamese fellow that ran the liquor store down here, used to call me Rico Bay. I'd walk in the door, he'd say, rico Bay, Bobby, a bottle of Rico Bay every day. There were times back then I don't know if you know, how sad I was, you know?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah. When the guy in the liquor store knows your name and what you drink.

[J.D. Ryan]

I used to occasionally wake up when.

[John Clay Wolf]

I go to the original. They just give it to me.

[Michael Turley]

Give it to you?

[J.D. Ryan]

Three in the morning in the parking lot of the Fort Worth Zoo.

[John Clay Wolf]

Now.

[Michael Turley]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

What? Hang on. You'd lost me. I wasn't listening to our own program.

[Ali Siddiq]

This is true.

[J.D. Ryan]

I'm just relating how bad it is.

[John Clay Wolf]

You bummed me out so bad I was thinking about something else. Let's start over. You were such a drunk and a loner and a depressed prick that you were drunk in the middle of the night, sitting in the zoo parking lot.

[J.D. Ryan]

I would. I would find myself there occasionally.

[John Clay Wolf]

Were you looking at porno on your iPhone?

[J.D. Ryan]

No, I was contemplating a life of crime. I was. I was trying to. To get myself up to stealing a monkey. I was really. No, you know, I know how dumb it sounds. But think about it. Drink a whole bottle of rum like yourself, you know, you're gonna steal a monkey.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

It wouldn't matter what kind.

[John Clay Wolf]

He just decided to spank one instead.

[J.D. Ryan]

Get in there. You know, just. No, no.

[John Clay Wolf]

Every night he'd go in there ready to steal a monkey to wind up spanking one instead. It's just like me getting on my sweat to go work out and I just sit in the parking lot.

[J.D. Ryan]

I'll go to work, hang around with, you know, and take him out to the movies.

[John Clay Wolf]

How many times have you driven up to the gym, not gone in?

[Michael Turley]

I have. Oh, absolutely done that many times. Especially in my drinking days.

[John Clay Wolf]

It's bad.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, yeah. You get there and you go, that's a long way to the door.

[J.D. Ryan]

Take my friend the monkey down to academy buying pair of shoes.

[John Clay Wolf]

It's a long way. The top just.

[Michael Turley]

I can't find a close parking place. I'm gonna go.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you don't shut up about this monkey, we're gonna give you something to be depressed about.

[Ali Siddiq]

Hey, monkey.

[John Clay Wolf]

800, 800. 7, 2, 3, 4.

[J.D. Ryan]

Let's go to Denny's, monkey.

[John Clay Wolf]

Let's play Willie's new tune again. Applying to Bobbo, it's called Vote him Out. If you don't like who's in there, vote them out.

[Uncle Roy]

Sing it.

[Michael Turley]

Really?

[John Clay Wolf]

That's what election day is all about. Okay, who wants to hear any more of Babo's. Who wants Baba's monkey story to stop? Raise your hand. We voted him out. He's dead. Thank you, Willie. Thank you, Willie. Thank you. 800, 817.

[Michael Turley]

That's the center we play anytime Bobble goes too long on a story.

[John Clay Wolf]

Stairway to Heaven trial is set. They're coming back. They did not have proper representation. Yes, Ted McKay. I know. I'm talking about this on 92.5and I'm not allowed to. Why, you are the man. But we're going to cover it too.

[Michael Turley]

I got you. A new trial is going to be held in a lawsuit that accused Led Zeppelin of.

[John Clay Wolf]

Can I do it in Ted McKay's voice?

[Michael Turley]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's always so fun.

[Michael Turley]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

For those of y' all Nashley that don't know who Ted McKay is, he's like the old 70s DJ.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

And he's a black fella and he sounds like chef from South Park. But he talks about. He's like a classic rock historian.

[Michael Turley]

He knows everything. Everything. He's such an encyclopedia of knowledge.

[John Clay Wolf]

A new trial will be held in a lawsuit that accused Led Zeppelin of copying at 1960s instrumental for stairway to Hell.

[Michael Turley]

Imagine this voice though, like this.

[John Clay Wolf]

Led Zeppelin won an earlier trial. But as the US Appeals court now ruled, the judge gave misleading instructions to the jurors. Led Zeppelin toured with the band spirit in 1968 and 1969. They contend this is when the one and only Jimmy Page would have heard the song Taurus. Now, we have two cuts to compare. Here's the one we've all heard a thousand times from Led Zeppelin. And this, according to the band's Spirit, is the tune they accused Jimmy Page of lifting or stealing from their already existing catalog.

[J.D. Ryan]

Damn, that's pretty close. It sure is.

[John Clay Wolf]

I don't know about you, but this seems as obvious to me as a corner store gas station hold up in the middle of the day. I'm gonna go with. Go with your gut. This is Ted McKay, and we'll be back to you on the flip side right here on 92.5. Oh, I got a minute left. I can't do that with that.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's not quite.

[Michael Turley]

I mean, you know, it's close, but not quite the same. They don't do that. They don't do that break.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, but they stole it, man.

[Michael Turley]

Well, you know, Jimmy Page could have heard that. Not even remember that he heard it.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know, because they do drugs. Let's get. Let's get the guy from the Rolling Stones in here. What's his name? Keith Richards. Keith Richards. Come over here. Tell me what you think.

[Michael Turley]

He would know, because he's heard a lot of songs, written a lot of songs.

[John Clay Wolf]

You were in the other room. You had the monitors on. You heard all that. What do you think?

[J.D. Ryan]

It needs some more on this.

[Ali Siddiq]

All right.

[J.D. Ryan]

That'S just thinking about Jimmy Faze.

[Ali Siddiq]

Well, you knew Jimmy.

[Michael Turley]

Well, you know Jimmy, of course.

[J.D. Ryan]

He's got wonderful swagger.

[Michael Turley]

He got swagger, you know, and he.

[J.D. Ryan]

I remember the film. Song Remains the Same. You seen it?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, the song Remains the Same.

[J.D. Ryan]

He gets off the plane and he's all shoulders and hips. Comes off the plane like that swagger of times. He just stoles a song, as much as liked it and wanted to have it for his own.

[Michael Turley]

That's called stealing. If you see something you like and you take it. That would be stealing.

[J.D. Ryan]

No, but it does it subconsciously, you know. Same thing happened to George.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, George.

[J.D. Ryan]

George, really? George Harrison. His song My Sweet Lord.

[Michael Turley]

What about that?

[J.D. Ryan]

You know the song My Sweet Lord? Yeah.

[Michael Turley]

My sweet Lord, I want to see.

[J.D. Ryan]

You low Kames got same melody as the Shirelles. He's so fine.

[Michael Turley]

He's so fine.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, and he actually lost a case, you know, for plagiarism. In Cork. Glad to pay money.

[Michael Turley]

Didn't know that.

[J.D. Ryan]

Well, because he got it subconsciously.

[John Clay Wolf]

So do you think Jimmy Page stole. Stole Taurus's song and they owe him money? The copyright infringement?

[J.D. Ryan]

I think he probably was drunk on gin. He likes to drink the gin. Maybe take a couple little blue pills like that. Heard the song, laughed it and forgot it. The next day he's playing on his guitar. Said, anyway, you taste a robot plant. He said, look what I've got. I've wrote great song. Call it Stairway. Call it Stairway to Spirit.

[Michael Turley]

Stairway, Spirit.

[J.D. Ryan]

Robert Plants. No, you should call it Stairway to Heaven. Made about a girl. A girl that pays for a stairway to heaven.

[Ali Siddiq]

Like that.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's totally stupid idea, but it might be hell.

[John Clay Wolf]

Keith Richards, everybody. I like your theory. I think you. I think you're onto something.

[Michael Turley]

That's exactly what happened.

[John Clay Wolf]

I can't wait to see you and Mick and go jam with the Stones again sometime soon. My name is John Clay Wolf. I buy cars, the radio. Be right back. Pleased to meet you. Hope you guess my.

[Radio Announcer]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf Show.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm live tonight in Uranus, which is.

[J.D. Ryan]

Actually a tourist attraction.

[Radio Announcer]

Call them toll free, 1-800-800-RADIO.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm not sure.

[Radio Announcer]

And now, Senor Juan Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

J.D.

[Michael Turley]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Just because you've been hanging out at the Topless Jealousy, you think you're in love with a waitress? You need to calm down.

[Michael Turley]

You think I should calm down?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yes.

[Michael Turley]

Well, I was just all. I found out she has three different Facebook profiles. Yeah, and looks different in every photo. And there's pictures of her in front of a jet and a beautiful car. You think maybe I'm losing my mind.

[John Clay Wolf]

She's a waitress, she's not a dancer.

[Bobby Brown]

Wait, wait, jd. You met a girl at a bar in your Facebook. Stalking her now?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, kind of.

[Michael Turley]

And she's got three different profiles and she looks different. She's like getting these stripper photos, but then she's on this horse.

[Bobby Brown]

Are you a friend with her? Well, on Facebook.

[John Clay Wolf]

Not yet.

[Bobby Brown]

Not yet. So that's your stalking?

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah.

[Michael Turley]

I wouldn't call it stalking as much as.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, he's asking us to look at her boobs and her chin and her nose to compare to see if they're all three of the same women.

[Michael Turley]

See, and I. And John's like, why are you doing this? I'm like, why wouldn't you do this?

[J.D. Ryan]

When do we start going to strip clubs again?

[Michael Turley]

I don't know what you're talking about.

[John Clay Wolf]

I've been Nothing but working.

[J.D. Ryan]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

I haven't been to a strip club in years. What are they like? Have you been to one?

[J.D. Ryan]

I got time for that? No.

[Bobby Brown]

Want to go?

[Michael Turley]

She's a waitress.

[John Clay Wolf]

She's not a dancer.

[Michael Turley]

She a waitress.

[John Clay Wolf]

What is the difference between a waitress and dancer? Strip joint.

[Uncle Roy]

10 minutes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Let's get Hannah in here. Come here, Hannah. Oh, yeah, no kidding.

[Bobby Brown]

We need to get her.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hannah. Did you start as a waitress or did you go straight to the masters?

[Uncle Roy]

What?

[Michael Turley]

Stop it.

[Uncle Roy]

What?

[J.D. Ryan]

God.

[John Clay Wolf]

Start us a. Wait.

[Michael Turley]

Well, some do a lot. Do they think they can get close and not get burned? Learned.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, here's. Here's the most widely spread misconception.

[Michael Turley]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

About the dancing business.

[Michael Turley]

That wasn't French, by the way.

[J.D. Ryan]

Everybody thinks that strippers are horrors.

[John Clay Wolf]

What? And we're not. What is a.

[J.D. Ryan]

Dancers are nice girls.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're nice girls.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah. All of them could just smile and shake our boobies backstage. All the girls are nice waitresses.

[John Clay Wolf]

Waitresses are evil.

[Michael Turley]

Why is that?

[John Clay Wolf]

Especially strip club waitress. Because they take all the money.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, they take all the money.

[John Clay Wolf]

They take all the money.

[Michael Turley]

I believe you go home with a lot more money.

[John Clay Wolf]

You made 40,000 at the super bowl last.

[Ali Siddiq]

Right?

[John Clay Wolf]

Last year.

[Michael Turley]

There's no waitress that made that in a year, much less a weekend.

[J.D. Ryan]

No, but they make like 13,000 in a wig.

[Ali Siddiq]

That's not fair.

[John Clay Wolf]

They don't have to show their boobies. They don't have to work out and take care of their body. Did I ever tell you at my bachelor party 10 years ago?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

We went to the strip club and our old nanny. So my. The nanny from my first marriage? Yes, the Peruvian was there dancing. Oh, that's so nice. Nice is not what I called it. It.

[Ali Siddiq]

But yes, it was.

[John Clay Wolf]

It was a positive. It was definitely a positive.

[Michael Turley]

That was a good experience all the way around.

[John Clay Wolf]

She wounded up marrying a buddy of mine.

[Ali Siddiq]

Did she?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yep. It's all good. There's love in the air.

[Ali Siddiq]

I love to see people. I know.

[John Clay Wolf]

And I saw a billboard of her.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, my God.

[John Clay Wolf]

On the highway. And I was like. Like, for fantasy or whatever. Whatever. Yeah. Spearmint Rhino or whatever the hell it was. And I was like, man, that looks just like Laura, the nanny from Peru. Sure enough, I called her and I said, did I just see you on a billboard?

[Michael Turley]

Nope.

[John Clay Wolf]

I swear. That was you.

[J.D. Ryan]

Nope.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, I've been doing some modeling. I'm like, yeah. Do you work at. Nope. No, I just model. So she denied it, and then she admitted that it was her, but she was just a paid Model. And then I go into this thing for my bachelor party and she was in there dancing. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. So, so, so, so we need to do this segment.

[Michael Turley]

Which one?

[John Clay Wolf]

We haven't done it in a while.

[Ali Siddiq]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

But this is the best email I think I've ever received.

[Michael Turley]

Every week we get emails from people that love the show from all over, especially as the show expands. You get people from Vegas and from California and other places that just love the show. Can't wait for it. People sit in their driveway, people podcast it. But every once in a while we get one that's not pleased.

[J.D. Ryan]

You just lost a listener.

[Michael Turley]

All right, everybody, I forgot all about this. And I believe we got one this week and it's a good one.

[John Clay Wolf]

This guy is.

[Uncle Roy]

I'll.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'll keep everybody's name at bay because this is a professional.

[Michael Turley]

Oh.

[John Clay Wolf]

He's in the business and he's trying. He wants to keep us out of his city.

[Caller]

Really?

[John Clay Wolf]

And we've been dealing with this for what now? 13 years. I've been on the air for 13 years. I've dealt with this every single. We're in 30 cities now. I've dealt with it every single step of the way.

[Ali Siddiq]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

So when. So he knows we're coming, so he's really throwing up a big, big, big block.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

To try to. Try to get it off.

[Michael Turley]

Really?

[John Clay Wolf]

Where is it? I listened to last week's show from JCW. In the first 10 minutes, they discuss a Facebook friend of one of the characters of the show. The Facebook friend had transitioned from female to male. The tone, the tone of the discussion was homophobic, uneducated, hateful, ignorant, and downright dangerous.

[J.D. Ryan]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

They refer to the individual as a broad shouldered, in a wide stance gal.

[J.D. Ryan]

What?

[Michael Turley]

Well, that's a drop, but yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

So we're talking about a. A man that turned into a woman on my Facebook friends.

[Michael Turley]

Right.

[John Clay Wolf]

I remember this a while back.

[Bobby Brown]

This is actually not last week.

[John Clay Wolf]

This is like two months ago. Yeah.

[Bobby Brown]

They were listening to the podcast because that's where I got the drops from. Is from that store.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's right.

[Michael Turley]

So he had to go.

[John Clay Wolf]

This is. Okay. So he was digging in. Oh, yeah. So he didn't just listen to 10 minutes. No, no. She seemed like the type of gal that would go from an egg to a pancake. I don't understand. What does that mean? That's what it cost to set it. But it's out of context. I don't get it.

[Michael Turley]

I'm sure it was Totally out of context.

[John Clay Wolf]

It might have been good at the time, but I don't get it now. No, his nipples are attractive.

[Michael Turley]

No idea.

[J.D. Ryan]

Okay, okay.

[Michael Turley]

He's just pulling little one line.

[John Clay Wolf]

He. Because see, we're a man. A woman that went to a man or one way.

[Ali Siddiq]

Right?

[John Clay Wolf]

I think it's a woman that went to a man or a man that went to war. I don't know.

[Bobby Brown]

You didn't know that's what you were talking.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, okay. That's right. I was confused. It was Pat from Saturday Night Live. He had baby making hips. Forget everything you had planned for this weekend because you are sitting on your couch and winning from the comfort of your own home. I'm here with Spin Quest where you can play hundreds of slot games, all the table games you love, and you could even win real cash Prizes. New users, $30 coin packs are on sale for [e-mail] Spin Quest is a free to play social casino, voidware prohibited. Visit spin quest.com for more details.

[Michael Turley]

He's just pulling clips.

[John Clay Wolf]

More like catching the tail back on an end around.

[Michael Turley]

Now that was funny.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you. This goes well with this weekend?

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you lined up against this old gal doing Oklahoma drills and in ball practice, she would win a few whistles. For those of y' all that don't know what Oklahoma drills are, weren't football players. That's when you get. You set up mock plays in a closed format where it's heavy contact heavy, heavy tackle heavy. Heavy is as heavy as it gets. And, and, and he claims, he alleges that I said if you lined up across from this old gal doing Oklahoma drills, she would win a few whistles. In a mock conversation, I would be concerned. I'm gonna skip some of this.

[Bobby Brown]

This is a listener.

[John Clay Wolf]

But there was something that he said where he called us inhumane, I believe. Yeah. Later in the email there, you know me, I push for the content that the format requires. I've managed Lewis and Floor Wax, Whipping Boy and Uncle Nasty, Willie B and the 88s.

[Michael Turley]

So he's DJs.

[Bobby Brown]

So he's listened to those type of DJs.

[Michael Turley]

What was that about a floor wax?

[Bobby Brown]

What was the name of them again?

[John Clay Wolf]

Uncle Nasty and Floor Wax.

[J.D. Ryan]

What is that?

[Michael Turley]

That ain't real.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm telling you, I don't know these people.

[Bobby Brown]

So he's listened to those DJs, managed them. Oh, man.

[John Clay Wolf]

He kept them in check.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, yeah, he kept the floor wax.

[John Clay Wolf]

He could keep Uncle Nasty and Floor Wax in check. But we are downright dangerous.

[Michael Turley]

We're over the danger.

[J.D. Ryan]

Dangerous.

[John Clay Wolf]

Dangerous. This is lazy content that caters to the lowest common denominator and uses hateful ignorant approach to try to get a laugh and.

[Michael Turley]

Okay, thanks for making our point.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know, out of all that, I love all that. Except the fact you call me lazy.

[Michael Turley]

Oh no, you're a lot of things lazy.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm a lot of things, but I'm not lazy. Floor wax man. If anybody's lazy, it's you for just listening to 10 minutes, right? And that's the first 8 o' clock segment of the each show. And we are bluer and rougher right out of the gate. 8:06 in the morning because we know that the Die Hards are listening and the rest of the folks aren't up driving yet. Cuz it's set Saturday morning.

[Bobby Brown]

Just like him. He found it on a podcast that.

[John Clay Wolf]

Was four months old. And I think that's lazy of you and I think you need to not be lazy and you need to dig in and listen to the long form product and then tell me if I'm LCD and lowest common denominator and dangerous and a homophobic. I'm not homophobic. Bob O, you used to be gay and you and I are good friends, right?

[J.D. Ryan]

Damn right.

[John Clay Wolf]

Bob, have you ever gotten. You lived with three gay men and are you and I friends?

[Ali Siddiq]

I live with five.

[John Clay Wolf]

I have a gay friend that went, went to SMU and he lives in Oklahoma now and he's coming down for Texas OU this weekend. He's married with a bunch of kids. He'll never admit that he's gay, but I know it and I'm friends with him.

[Michael Turley]

And you're still.

[John Clay Wolf]

And I don't even tell on him. No, I'll never say his name.

[Michael Turley]

Of course not.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's not homophobic.

[Michael Turley]

That's not at all.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'll go to dinner with him if they show up. Hey friend, if you're listening, you know who I'm talking about. Call me. I want to meet y' all tonight for dinner for Texas. Oh, you'll be right back. Canada, Mexico and the US have reached.

[Bobby Brown]

A new trade agreement to replace nafta.

[Radio Announcer]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf Show. Hit him up right now. 1-800-800-radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

Mexico will send us heavy machinery. Canada will send us timber. And we'll send one of them Kanye.

[Ali Siddiq]

That's how it works.

[Radio Announcer]

This is the John Clay Wolf Show.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ed, are you a Rolling Stones fan?

[Ed (Buyer)]

No, I'm more to hip hop, sir. So Rolling Stones is not necessarily my thing. I've heard of him though.

[John Clay Wolf]

How old are you, Ed?

[DJ Pre K]

4?

[Ed (Buyer)]

5? 45 as of right now. 45.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to Ed the Gimme the vin buyer. He's a Puerto Rican Jew man from New York City, the Bronx, ladies and gentlemen.

[Ali Siddiq]

He said hi, Ed.

[John Clay Wolf]

And he really, really, really likes to eat and enjoys his hip hop.

[Ed (Buyer)]

What's for lunch, sir?

[John Clay Wolf]

Ed, the reason I. Do you know why you, why I called you up here from the buyer's room downstairs?

[Ed (Buyer)]

No idea, sir.

[John Clay Wolf]

No idea.

[Bobby Brown]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, I've been informed by other people is actually your, your manager, Baby Huey. That's what I nicknamed your manager. I've known him a while, but he's having an attendance problem with some of his staff members and we were going over your, your, your, your, your personal situation on your time. So you come to, you come to work an hour late and you leave an hour early. Is this, is this, is this true?

[Ed (Buyer)]

This is absolutely true, sir.

[John Clay Wolf]

Absolutely not dodging. Is this new or is this old or has this been going on since I knew you and I just didn't. Nobody told on you or what?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Well, what it comes down to is that luckily my managers have been pretty quiet about it to, to try to keep me on is what it come down to. So I've been pretty blessed.

[John Clay Wolf]

Until you met Kyle.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Until I met Kyle.

[John Clay Wolf]

So, so when you started here, you, me, the vin, did you, were you doing this, this, this two hour skip schedule day one, or did, did it happen after? Did, did you come in here and lube up the deal and get us liking you and then pull this crap?

[Ed (Buyer)]

That's exactly right. That's exactly right. It happened to be something with the state of Texas, but we won't go into that.

[John Clay Wolf]

So Ali Sadiq's in here, the comedian. I don't. Some of you guys know him, some of you don't. If you, if you do, he's going to be at the Improv Dallas tonight. Ali, good morning. You're a big, big Houston homeboy. We've got a lot of listeners down in Houston. We're on the Buzz and in ESPN down in Houston right now. Good morning, sir.

[Ali Siddiq]

Good morning. I'm sitting there thinking of this two hour, two hour skip schedule as you call it.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, ain't that a hell of a deal?

[Ali Siddiq]

What is this two hours? Did you lube us up and get us to like, you're like. Nah, I pretty much started from the jump.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's 10 hours a week.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, I pretty much been, you know, skimming off the top from the jump. I'm skimming off the top and the bottom.

[John Clay Wolf]

So he here. Ali and I want to. I wanted to have you on for this segment because. Because I think. I think we're going to pinch. We're either going to pinch Ed down and he's going to admit that he's lying or he's going to educate us on something we were uninformed of.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, Ed said he was. He said.

[Michael Turley]

He admitted it.

[Ali Siddiq]

He admitted I'm pretty blessed.

[John Clay Wolf]

I've been pretty blessed. But here's the story. Here's the story. Here's why. Actually, Ed, go ahead and share the story. I don't want to put words in your mouth. Why do you come an hour late and why do you leave an hour early?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Well, unfortunately, John, I live with someone who's not supposed to be supervising our child.

[Michael Turley]

What?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Yes. If you ever met a great.

[John Clay Wolf]

You live with someone that's not supposed to be supervising your child. But whose child is it?

[Ed (Buyer)]

It's hers.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. And she lives with you and her. Do you have custody of this child? Technically, no. Okay, so now it's getting a little small.

[Uncle Roy]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

Does she have custody of this child?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Technically, yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so why is she not supposed to be supervising? It says the only person who would say she's not supposed to be supervised is a judge. So as a judge said that and signed a court order that says, no, you can't supervise this child that you have custody of.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Well, I know you know the call letter cps. So they're the ones that kind of did it. And if you ever met a crazy.

[John Clay Wolf]

But the CPS works with the courts. So did they sign a court order that said she can't have her kids?

[Caller]

Kid?

[Ed (Buyer)]

No, just.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, next subject. Sorry to cut you off, but I've got to cuz I want to keep this thing in the middle of the road. So now why are you late to work an hour and leaving an hour early?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Only because I have to take care of the child and bring her to daycare and pick her up from daycare.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Who's the daddy of the child?

[Ed (Buyer)]

He is not around.

[John Clay Wolf]

Where is he?

[Ed (Buyer)]

He's probably back in Mexico.

[John Clay Wolf]

How old is this child?

[Ed (Buyer)]

She's one year, six months.

[John Clay Wolf]

One year, six months. That's great. How long have you been with this woman?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Oh, 10 years.

[Ali Siddiq]

There's a lot of racist going on. Like a Puerto Rican Jew with a Sicilian with a Mexican with a half Mexican baby.

[Michael Turley]

You can't write this United nations the.

[J.D. Ryan]

Last time you saw the Father, Was he wearing boots?

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm screwing this mule. You're just holding its head. So tell me something. What are you doing in the morning? What time you get to work?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Nine o', clock, hopefully.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so you have to drop the baby off at 8.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Generally between 8 and 8:30.

[John Clay Wolf]

Why?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Because I don't have a choice.

[Ali Siddiq]

Why?

[John Clay Wolf]

Hang on, Sadiq, you'll love this. Why?

[Ed (Buyer)]

I have no choice. I'm the only one that's taken care of. I'm only one who wakes up with her. I'm the only one that does everything for her, so.

[John Clay Wolf]

But why don't you drop her off early earlier?

[Ed (Buyer)]

I just don't want her in daycare. I mean, for crying out loud, for a million hours. I'll be honest with you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, but did you lie to your manager and tell him that the daycare did not open until 8am no.

[Bobby Brown]

Huh?

[John Clay Wolf]

Because we called the daycare and they're open at 6am Brother Ed, Brother Ed. They're open at 6 and they stay open. Tell. Do you know what time they close?

[Ed (Buyer)]

6:30.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so you just decide to chill in the morning for an extra hour and chill in the evening for an extra hour.

[Ali Siddiq]

Traffic.

[Ed (Buyer)]

I don't know if wiping butts and snots is necessarily chilling, but.

[Ali Siddiq]

Well, traffic you got. You got to get commute time.

[Uncle Roy]

You need commute time.

[John Clay Wolf]

We need to make a deal. And I'm, I'm. I'm actually gonna hand it over to Ali right now.

[Michael Turley]

Here we go.

[John Clay Wolf]

And let him negotiate the new deal. And in what kind of terms? I'm going to let you be my lawyer, Ali.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm staying with the original. I'm staying with the, with the original deal.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hey, he's our hr.

[Uncle Roy]

You just.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're hiring him as our hr.

[Ali Siddiq]

No Home, no foul.

[J.D. Ryan]

There you go. There you go.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yo, that's funny.

[John Clay Wolf]

We've got Ali Sadiq. He's in, in studio with the, the one, the only from Houston, Texas. He's on in the Improv. And Dallas, like last night. Is this a three night runner for Fortnite Run?

[Ali Siddiq]

This is a Fortnite Run.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is tonight the last night of it?

[Ali Siddiq]

No, Sunday's last night.

[John Clay Wolf]

And then Austin at where?

[Ali Siddiq]

Cap City Comedy Club. Actually, that's my birthday weekend, so I'm trying to have all the fun that weekend in Austin.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, between now and tonight. Tonight you're a comedian right now you are the HR coordinator for Give Me the vin, a large corporation. And I need you to negotiate this and tell me what, how we're going to Settle this problem because you got to understand, there's a not a lot of other employees, a lot of other buyers that have to be here on time and they have to leave on time. But Ed, since he made love to nobody but let someone else make love to his woman and he's taking care of their baby, and then I'm having to pay for it. That's the way I see it. But I'll let you handle it. I'll shut up.

[J.D. Ryan]

I can't wait to hear that.

[Ali Siddiq]

Okay, this is what I'm gonna go with now, seeing that. Who brought these allegations towards it? Let's just go with that. Who brought the allegations towards it?

[John Clay Wolf]

Manager and other buyers.

[Ali Siddiq]

Okay. Managers and other buyers. Is. Has Ed been doing his work? Has Ed work been getting done?

[John Clay Wolf]

Turley, has he been hitting right, or has it been a little slacky?

[Bobby Brown]

As far as I know, his number's.

[John Clay Wolf]

Been pretty good because I was on the manager's case and he was blaming it on it.

[Ali Siddiq]

The thing is, the number's been right. If the numbers been right.

[John Clay Wolf]

See this?

[Ali Siddiq]

This is where everything opens up. See, this is where Ed has a lot of leeway. My number's been right. I've been getting all my work done in at least the least amount of time.

[John Clay Wolf]

I got a hard out. We'll be back in three minutes. My name is John Clay Wolf, and I buy cars on the radio.

[Radio Announcer]

Broadcasting live from the Wolf radio studios, it's time for the John Clay Wolf show, presented by gimmethevin.com hit him up now.

[John Clay Wolf]

800.

[Radio Announcer]

800 radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know how much whiskey you can buy with that?

[Radio Announcer]

Now, John Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hang on. I got a bit of car real quick. And then we got to get back to this whole Ed drama. We've got the manager up here, We've got our HR man Ali Siddiq in the house, and we're gonna get all this to the bottom. Ryan, good morning. You're on the air. I'm good. 2017. Oh, it's a F250 King Ranch. Gotcha. Four wheel drive, leather nav 4, 000 miles.

[Caller]

No roof, no sunroof? No. It was a custom order truck from the factory. So I got the premium vinyl floors and the fixed running board.

[John Clay Wolf]

Time, time, time, time, time, time.

[Uncle Roy]

Stop.

[John Clay Wolf]

Premium vinyl floors?

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah. What's that?

[Michael Turley]

Premium?

[John Clay Wolf]

Premium. You don't. Is there a premium? So was there a lower level of vinyl floor that they offered?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[Caller]

So there's a level of vinyl floors that goes in like the work truck?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Enter cheaper material and Then the stuff that goes in, it's almost like a bed liner. Spray in on the inside so you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Learn something new every day. You got to ask questions. You got to ask questions. So. So. So you can wash it. If you have a big night out with your gal and have a blowout or something or spill a drink, then you can just. You can just take the garden hose and wash the damn floorboards out.

[Caller]

Yep, theoretically.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, now, I understand this. So we got a 15 crew cab. Does 55,000 buy it?

[Caller]

No, not close. You said 17 crew cab, right?

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, a 17 crew cab. Yeah. Now, why would that.

[Uncle Roy]

What?

[John Clay Wolf]

Don't give me that not close business. I mean, you know, you can go get a new one for 64, right?

[Caller]

No, probably not. I mean, probably closer to 70, I think, is where you could get one.

[John Clay Wolf]

There rebates this time of year, pretty heavy, but. Okay. So what does it take to buy this truck?

[Caller]

Probably about 62.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is that because you owe 62 on it?

[Caller]

No, actually, I only owe 30 on it.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so you got a lot of equity. Do this. I want to see these premium vinyl floors. Remember, you don't have a sunroof, and that slows it down because people who like Cadillac trucks like all the gear. And you crippled yourself a little bit when you didn't buy the sunroof. But Anyway, go to givemetheven.com. load it up. I. I'm. I want to be realist. I want to get the truck bought. I can't be an idiot. So don't be an idiot. On the other side, if we'll agree that we. I'll be reasonable, and you be reasonable. We'll get a deal done if you want to sell it.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Uncle Roy]

All right.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. And I want to. I want to broadcast that. Same here. For this problem we have in the office. Well, everybody be reasonable.

[Uncle Roy]

Absolutely.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm gonna recap real quick for those of y' all who just tuned in. We've got Ed, the buyer. We've got Kyle, the manager, AKA Baby Huey. We've got Ali Sadiq, who is our ahee.

[Ali Siddiq]

He.

[John Clay Wolf]

Nobody knows this, but he works in our HR department during the week, and he's on at the Improv tonight in Dallas and tomorrow. But that aside. So Kyle came to me. I was busting Kyle's balls about his numbers, and he said he's having an attendance problem with his team. And we were talking. I said, well, that's your problem. That's a you problem. You're the manager. You need to get your people here. He Said, well, you like Ed? I said, of course I like Ed. He said, well, he ain't here. He's called in sick twice. He shows up an hour late, he leaves an hour early, and he da, da, da, this kid. And he's got to take care of this kid. But the kid's not his. It's his wife's and his wife or his girlfriend, but it's. It's with another guy. And. And he said that the daycare doesn't open until 8 o'. Clock. And we called the daycare and they open at 6 o'. Clock. We're not calling you a liar, Ed. I'm calling Kyle a misinformed person.

[Ed (Buyer)]

That's possibly true.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so, Kyle, tell me. Tell me. And don't. Don't start. Because we're all here now. We're in arbitration. Be honest. What's. What's your beef, Kyle?

[J.D. Ryan]

Well, I got.

[John Clay Wolf]

You got to get in that microphone, Huey.

[J.D. Ryan]

I gotta run a business. I got five guys.

[John Clay Wolf]

If your lips aren't touching the mic, the people can't hear you.

[J.D. Ryan]

And when I. When I don't have all five of my guys, business isn't happening. Oh, and every time I look up, someone's missing. One day I look up. I got one guy. I got one guy in Vegas I gotta keep tabs on. I got one guy that's got a story here. Guys store there. I understand you got life after happens, but you can only have a story every so often. You can't have one every damn day. Every day. And then it's like, oh, well, it's Saturday. Well, hang on, there's four Saturdays in a row.

[Uncle Roy]

What are we doing here?

[J.D. Ryan]

I mean, how many times you gonna go out to the car and it doesn't start and you're gonna go, I love this car. I'm gonna keep doing this car. I said, hey. And so I gathered them all up. It wasn't just dead. I had to get them all up and said, hey, what are we doing here? Who's gonna come on the bus and who's not? So we had a little talk. And it talked. Stretched over a week, we had to talk. A lot of talk.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ed, do you think you were abusing the freedoms that you were given? Be honest.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Maybe a little bit.

[Michael Turley]

That's honest.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is that the Puerto Rican Jew from the Bronx in you? Is that just the Yankee in you pushing and just pushing it until somebody stops you? Because that's kind of the way people are up there.

[Ed (Buyer)]

I love pushing the limit. That's what it Come down to. If you can't handle it, then, you know.

[John Clay Wolf]

So do you respect Huey for. For bowing up and saying, hey, Ed, you're running over me here?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Absolutely.

[Uncle Roy]

Absolutely.

[John Clay Wolf]

So, Ali, were you keeping score of his. Of his attendance? Because I didn't realize he missed four Saturdays in a row in like, four. Four days also.

[Ali Siddiq]

I. I'm. I'm keeping attendance. I'm. I'm keeping attendance because he said, got a story here, got a story there. You know, it's four weeks of stories, and it's car. Every week. I'm pulling everything together.

[Michael Turley]

What happens if you don't show up for a show at the comedy club? Oh, yeah, right.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, that.

[Michael Turley]

Very bad.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, that's gonna be bad. Yeah. Seeing that I'm the main actor.

[Michael Turley]

You are the main actor. Headliner.

[Ali Siddiq]

See, Ed is kind of covered. Cause he a part of a team. And then baby Hughie say, who? Getting on the bus? And Ed is like, I got a baby. Can I bring my baby on the bus? And he was like, nah, you got a story here, you got a story there.

[John Clay Wolf]

But the daycare ain't open till 8. But hang on. It might be.

[Ali Siddiq]

But see, this is the best thing that we call. I think that's been my favorite line the whole time. You say the daycare goes. We called the daycare. That's my favorite line. We've called the daycare. And the daycare opens at 6. And Ed was like, yeah, yeah, it does. Does. Don't want the baby to be there 12 million hours. So I take the liberty of skimming off the top of my work schedule.

[John Clay Wolf]

10 hours a week.

[Ali Siddiq]

Because I'm not on the bus yet. I'm not on the bus. So Huey talking to you? And then is it. Is, are you okay? Is his work getting done? Done is what I'm trying to ask. It's the work getting done.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, you have to look at getting the mic Qing.

[J.D. Ryan]

How efficient can we be if we were there the whole time?

[Uncle Roy]

The whole time.

[Ali Siddiq]

Okay, this sounds like he. Maybe he won't extra work. I mean, you getting your numbers done. But if you give me them two.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hours and where you're getting the numbers done, it makes a good.

[Ed (Buyer)]

My numbers done? Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

He can do in 30 hours what everybody else can do in 40. 40.

[J.D. Ryan]

Well, here's the thing.

[John Clay Wolf]

He's taking off Saturdays get done at 25.

[J.D. Ryan]

It'd make a great pizza. But I want all eight slices, not seven.

[Ali Siddiq]

Okay? That's respect. You gotta respect that.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, he's got. He's got good numbers. He's got. Good. I just want more of them.

[Ali Siddiq]

Can I bring the baby?

[J.D. Ryan]

Can't bring the baby. There's. This isn't a. Not an environment for the baby.

[Ali Siddiq]

Not an environment for the baby.

[Uncle Roy]

Okay.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm just saying if I just. Okay, what if I. Okay, this is my car. If I can show up with the baby for 30 minutes, then I only skim off. 30 minutes. So. And then I'm. And then I'm back on the top. I'm be back on the hour.

[John Clay Wolf]

How far is the daycare from the office?

[Ed (Buyer)]

40 minutes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, damn.

[Ali Siddiq]

Oh, okay. So. Yeah, that. That's going to be a problem.

[John Clay Wolf]

HR Siddiq, we need. You're. You're leaving a big question here. What is mama doing?

[Ali Siddiq]

I was going to come around to that. I didn't know how touchy it was. I was going to ask. Have Huey to. To pose that question. You're saying why are we not getting to the eighth slice? Ed, what is. Is. Do you have an associate chef or assistant chef help you make this pizza?

[Uncle Roy]

Or.

[Ali Siddiq]

Or is. Is she halfway getting the baby dressed so you can leave out of the official time? Can she pick them up one time a week? What can. What type of compromise with the Sicilian? I know it's a family. You got to talk to the family. You got to go through somebody.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is that.

[Ali Siddiq]

But what can we do on that end?

[Ed (Buyer)]

If she would take her medication and stop drinking.

[Ali Siddiq]

Okay, so now we need. We need a.

[John Clay Wolf]

We need a nurse.

[Ali Siddiq]

Now we need a nurse to help us take a.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so what time does the drinking start?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Usually somewhere around 12 to 1 o'.

[John Clay Wolf]

Clock in the morning. Because you know you can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning. My name is John Clay Wolf. Just to reset everything, we're talking about Ed of truancy at work and his step baby. He's the step boyfriend of this baby, but he's taking it onto his own and it's causing a big slack in his work. About 20 hour week, Ms. Is what it sounds like about halftime. But Ed's so good, he's knocking down his numbers half time, so he's just riding it out. And you got to remember Ed when you're here because this is even more impressive. Sadiq, he's an eater and he spends maybe 20% of his time at work planning food and eating food.

[Ali Siddiq]

Planning food planning food.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yes, Kyle, explain the food planning.

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh, it's Good morning, what's for lunch today? Good morning, what's for lunch.

[Michael Turley]

Yet he still Gets his numbers done every day.

[J.D. Ryan]

We get a. There's a. There's a special that we hit. And Ed. Ed's got the roster for the. For the lunch special.

[John Clay Wolf]

What are you planning today? What's your. What's your food plan today? A lot of these workout people do food plans, and Ed's got a food plan, too. Lots of it.

[Ali Siddiq]

Lots of it.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Fried fish. Fried fish.

[Uncle Roy]

Fried fish.

[Ali Siddiq]

Sir, where.

[John Clay Wolf]

Where's the fried fish? Coming.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Lisa's. Lisa's Chicken.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Lisa's Chicken. Are you taking photos?

[Ali Siddiq]

Are you at Lisa's Chicken?

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Nothing's matching up here. We eat fried fish at Lisa's Chicken with chicken chick.

[John Clay Wolf]

It's an interesting thing, but see, we're planning on. On growing in. Here's the reason we hadn't fired Ed's ass. It's real simple, and I think Ed knows this, and we're just going to bring it out. So we're playing it. We're planning a launch in dc, Philly, New York City, all that. And those rough some bitches. What do they need to talk to them? Another rough sum. And Ed can talk that language. He was a car dealer in the Bronx. I mean, if he can't do it, nobody can. And obviously the man has talent because he's doing what everybody else does in half the time, and he's got his mouth full of food. Why he's doing it. And hold the baby.

[Ali Siddiq]

And holding the baby. So I'm a career man that eats and watch my child.

[John Clay Wolf]

So. So, Ed, we want you to grow in the company. And I know you're Puerto Rican, and I know you're Jewish, and I don't know if that combination is where all this talent is coming from, but somewhere down deep, it is very in there. But I need you to help me. Lewis and Clark to the Yankee town, man.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Oh, we can do it.

[John Clay Wolf]

I know it. But you got to be here to do it.

[Uncle Roy]

I got you.

[John Clay Wolf]

So we got to get mama off the wino or grandmama to come into the mix and pick up baby in the morning. Now what? Is mama sleeping in all morning?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Mama's sleeping in all morning.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so. So she got pregnant with another man's child. He's gone, she's drunk. And you got the baby?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Yes, sir.

[Ali Siddiq]

Is that a Kavanal sleep like you just. She got drunk and she just went to sleep or did she pass out?

[Ed (Buyer)]

No, no, it's passed out for sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

What time is she awake? Cuz, you're talking pretty loose, so she probably ain't up Yet?

[Uncle Roy]

No.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Oh, absolutely not, sir.

[Ali Siddiq]

She's not even up yet talking. That's funny. So you talking pretty loose. So she's not.

[Ed (Buyer)]

Let's, let's talk around three, four o' clock this, this afternoon and then we'll see.

[John Clay Wolf]

Jd, do you have any input? Because you're down there a lot of the time.

[Michael Turley]

No, he's on a different part of the room, actually. I don't.

[J.D. Ryan]

But.

[John Clay Wolf]

But the food part, you see.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, all the time.

[John Clay Wolf]

It has. How does that work?

[Michael Turley]

It's just the moment anyone mentions food, he's up, he's waving his hand. I'm ready. And you also go around the office asking people what they're gonna do. He knows every restaurant in this area.

[John Clay Wolf]

I've got another question for you. When Lieutenant Dan's wife, ex wife, soon to be, came in trying to kill everybody that day, were you there?

[Ed (Buyer)]

Yes, sir.

[John Clay Wolf]

Now why didn't you? Why didn't you? I mean, you're a big bad, brawny Bronx guy. Why didn't you slow that deal down? Well, I figured there were.

[Ed (Buyer)]

There were actually role playing in the office.

[Michael Turley]

You have such a weird life.

[Ali Siddiq]

Done that man said. I thought they were role plays.

[John Clay Wolf]

My HR man already quit. He quit. If you want to see him, he's got a new job. He's. It's Ali Sadiq. He's going to be at the Improv in Arlington or Dallas.

[Ali Siddiq]

Addison.

[John Clay Wolf]

Addison. Addison Improv over by the Addison Airport tonight and tomorrow night. How long have you been a stand up comedian? Professional?

[Ali Siddiq]

20 years.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, wow.

[Ali Siddiq]

20 years.

[John Clay Wolf]

What about TV? What's your latest TV gig? Don't you have something coming together?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, my latest, this came out February 23rd. My special was on Comedy Central. It was called It's Bigger than these Bars. Before that I had a Comedy Central half hour special and I've been on HBO, Showtime, TruTV. I'll be on TruTV three times this year on the thing called Laugh Mob, Laugh Tracks.

[Bobby Brown]

And you've done some actual prison time too, right? And that's kind of part of your standards.

[John Clay Wolf]

And that's why I got you and Ed together. Because he hasn't ever told me this, but I have a feeling. Ed, you ever been behind bars?

[Uncle Roy]

Just one time.

[Ed (Buyer)]

One time.

[John Clay Wolf]

I got a good gut on these kind of things. Tell me about your situation.

[Ed (Buyer)]

What happened in New York City? Giuliani made a new law. If you're driving without your license on you, you get arrested immediately.

[John Clay Wolf]

Really?

[Ali Siddiq]

Definitely, yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ouch. Is that why you came to Texas?

[Ed (Buyer)]

That's exactly Right to get away.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, we'll be back. Una momento, por favor. My, is that the right time? Yeah, we can get a break. We've got Ollie, you can hang around as long as you want. Ed, you need to get your ass back to work. My name is John Clay Wolf and I buy cars. If you want to. If you want to talk to Ed and have him bid your car, obviously he's a pretty good buyer. Go to givemetheven.com, load it up. And when that happy Puerto Rican Jew man calls you back, that's big Ed, and he might have some food for you.

[Radio Announcer]

Now back to the John Clay Wolf show.

[John Clay Wolf]

I gotta bid a few cars. Sadiq, I don't know if you know this, but we mixed this thing. Did you hear me bid that car a minute ago?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yes, I did. And I got so excited because I finally realized where I was at. Because I've listened to you and I was like, yo, you, the coffee, like in the van. I'm like, yo, I was sitting there and I'm like, I listened to you and had no clue. Knew that I was right.

[John Clay Wolf]

You didn't know that's where you were coming.

[Ali Siddiq]

Not until you. Until I caught your voice and you said, well, give me the video. Because I. I remember you are the guy on the radio to be talking so much trash about people like, hey, okay, give me the real. What's going on with your car? Cause I wanted to call it. I have a. I have a old expedition. I wanted to call you one time, just give you a bunch of. Look, I got this expedition and it has this. He was like, yo, I just wanted to hear you talk crazy to me. But that's not. It doesn't have that.

[John Clay Wolf]

So when you were coming in to do the show, Bobble line this up, you didn't even know where you were coming.

[Ali Siddiq]

I just agreed a lot of times.

[John Clay Wolf]

Do you realize that you're on in San Diego right now? No, on Las Vegas, on the Mountain Rock station right now. No, you're on in Houston, of course. Dallas, Oklahoma, Austin, Baton Rouge, New Orleans, Abilene, Wichita Falls, Midland. We're Corpus, San Antonio, Austin. Yeah. You're knocking it all down.

[Ali Siddiq]

As long as I'm not on in Hondo, Texas, which is right by San Antonio. Because when you say certain places like Midland, Odessa, it just bring back bad locked up memories. It's a prison down in. In Hondu by San Antonio called Torres. And then up in Midland is Hondo. Oh, yeah. Because what it was John Wayne had, it was the John Wayne movie. I hated that place.

[John Clay Wolf]

You. You know what you need to do. Ali. Ali Sadiq. I've got your name. Next TV special.

[Ali Siddiq]

What's that?

[John Clay Wolf]

Live from Lukenbach. I mean that's the whitest place on the planet. And you do a stand up in Lukenbach. I mean, all the country people be like, what?

[Ali Siddiq]

It sound white too, Luke. And Bach. It sound. It sound like.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

You ever even heard of it? Willie sang about it a while back. We're going to work on that, Nelson.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

We'll be right back. My name is John Clay Wolf. His name's Ali Sadiq. We got J.D. ryan, Bobbo and Turley right here on the show. Be back uno momento for.

[Ali Siddiq]

Let's call.

[J.D. Ryan]

The John Clay Wolf show. His guitars tune good and firm feeling women.

[John Clay Wolf]

I don't need my name in the marquee lights I got my song and I got you with me tonight. Maybe it's time we got back to the basics of love.

[Caller]

Love.

[John Clay Wolf]

Let's go to L. Tex. This is the place I'm talking about.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Luke, have you ever heard this song?

[Ali Siddiq]

Ali never heard of. I like it, but I like. It's like I feel like I should be fishing.

[Michael Turley]

Yes, exactly. You should be.

[John Clay Wolf]

I think you need to do a TV special live from Luc.

[Michael Turley]

So great.

[John Clay Wolf]

I will do all I can to help you with this. Cuz I think this would be fun.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm. I'm game for this.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm real down with what they call it. Polarizing. That's how those program directors say. Very polarizing. Which means like a lot of people love you and a lot of people hate you. That's fine. That's fine.

[Ali Siddiq]

We gonna figure it out. Watch. I'mma call back with a date and like, yo, let's see. Can we get it for this date?

[John Clay Wolf]

Let's go to Luckenbach, Texas. Ali City TV special.

[Michael Turley]

For those that think it's just a song, it's a real place. It's just outside of Fredericksburg. Little bitty doctor in the road. You literally have to find the GPS it to get in there.

[John Clay Wolf]

8008-0072-3480-0800.

[Ali Siddiq]

How far is it from Bell County?

[Michael Turley]

Bell County. Are you wanted in Bell County?

[Bobby Brown]

So do you judge everything by jails? That's how you know how far distance stuff is?

[Ali Siddiq]

No, not actually. I just know it's certain places that I know there's a jail there and I. And I don't like the place. You prefer not to be there? I don't really. I'm not A hunter, a Huntsville guy. I'm really not a Huntsville guy. The walls gory LS1 LS2. I'm really not a Huntsville guy.

[DJ Pre K]

Do you get.

[John Clay Wolf]

Do you get prisoner mail? No, I get a lot.

[Ali Siddiq]

You do? Most people on radio stations get a lot of prison. I never wrote radio stations. I didn't know. I didn't know. I didn't even get the address. Hey, you in jail? You like? Who looks that up? What a radio station is, is I'mma write them.

[Michael Turley]

Looking for years, years we be getting that.

[Ali Siddiq]

I know a lot of radio places get a lot of prison mail. I don't get any. And I give my P.O. box out. I give my P.O. box write me.

[John Clay Wolf]

I get art. I get all kinds of stuff. I. It's, it's. It's pretty interesting, the prison mail, but our number here is 8008-0072-3480-0800. Radio. Ali. I've got to. I've got to listen to you this morning. And I. And I'll admit I did not. I had not listened to your material until last night, and I like it. And then today. So has anybody talked to you about bringing back a sketch comedy like the Chappelle Show? Because you're the guy that do it. There's no question you're the guy to do it.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, no. Nobody ever asked me to do sketches because I'm. I don't feel like I'm the guy.

[John Clay Wolf]

But you could get a writer to help you. You do. I'm telling you, I've got a good feel for these things. And you're that guy. He freaked out, he got paid, he went to Africa, he comes back for a glory tour every once in a while. He's not quite as funny as he used to be. You know the story.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, right.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're talking about Chappelle.

[Ali Siddiq]

Sure.

[John Clay Wolf]

But, man, there's a hole in the market for that.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah. And it's. It's. For some reason I'm trusting you. And it. Not like it's a lot of times, and people who listening, people, especially my managers, listen. He's probably like, why is he trusting him? He can hear it in my voice that the next thing is go, hey, we need to go to Luke and Box.

[Michael Turley]

Luke and Box and Sketch Comics.

[Ali Siddiq]

We already have, you know. You know, Underwriter.

[Michael Turley]

Give me the vid dot com.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

And then we're gonna roll out the new TV show, and it's gonna be sketch comedy. We're gonna out Chappelle. Chappelle. It's been 20 years or 15 years. Let's do it.

[Ali Siddiq]

We're gonna out Chappelle.

[John Clay Wolf]

It can be done.

[J.D. Ryan]

That's pretty ambitious.

[Ali Siddiq]

You've been dropping. I don't know if people been listening, but you've been undercover dropping them. The you you are. What did you call a step boyfriend? I was done with that one. I laughed so hard over here, he's like, yeah, you got to hear bas baby daddy. But his step boyfriend, the father boyfriend.

[John Clay Wolf]

That'S what got him famous. If Chappelle hadn't had that show, he'd still just be hitting towns and doing and working hard. That's what got him rich. I mean, you might as well get paid. You said you've been doing this for 20 years, right? I mean, I'm sure you make a nice living, but wouldn't it be fun to make 10 million a year?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yes, it would be. It would be excellent. And, and Luke and Bond is gonna be the start of it. I'm telling you, my managers listening, like, nothing. Like, like, all right, let me start scout, cuz I know it's. I know it's happening.

[Michael Turley]

Yes. T shirts being printed as we speak.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yo, it's, it's easy when you have a under rod. When you going in with a under.

[John Clay Wolf]

You got money going in.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm like, yo, come on now. Slam country white people, I'm here.

[John Clay Wolf]

See, everybody wants to think that I'm racist. I catch a lot of hell about, about, you know, my. We bring up race, we talk about it. We love. I grew up with Chappelle Richard Prior. I like that kind of comedy. You heard what I hear? He's, he's the accidental racist. You heard what I said when you walked in here and I saw your face and it, it was. You were like, what the hell?

[Michael Turley]

He's on the floor. Hang on a minute.

[Ali Siddiq]

Jingle guy, the accidental racist. I'm accidentally racist. Like, it was, it was total accident.

[John Clay Wolf]

I didn't mean that to Texan. He's the accidental racist. But I'm not a racist at all. I'm opposite. You haven't met my uncle Roy. He's a 63 year old black man. I was drinking Mickey's and smoking cools with this man when I was 10. When I was 10. I'm not making this up.

[Ali Siddiq]

And this is. And, and I know, cuz nobody brings up the beer, Mickey, unless you drink it. It's the worst beer. He's like, yo, yeah, me and my uncle, you know, smoking new boys drinking Mickey. Like, yeah, he's he black.

[John Clay Wolf]

I Played football all the way through college. And I mean, you know, that's. I mean, a white guy in a. In a NCAA D1 locker room is not. He's a minority.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yes.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, you almost.

[John Clay Wolf]

Unless you're a quarterback.

[Ali Siddiq]

Or the punter. Or the punter.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

A lot. It's a lot of white punters. I don't think it's. No black punters. In all of the NFL.

[John Clay Wolf]

There's one.

[Ali Siddiq]

What is he? Who he punt for?

[Bobby Brown]

He's actually punting for Indianapolis Colts, I think, something like that. His name is King.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, but he's from Africa, and he used to play soccer.

[Ali Siddiq]

That's different. That is different. That is different. That is.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know what else black people don't do? I think they could do it. Well, I mean, they. They master all the sports they get into. What about stock car racing? What about water skiing? What about snow skiing? What about snowboarding?

[J.D. Ryan]

We need to.

[John Clay Wolf]

We need to straighten this out. They're the race racist. It ain't me.

[Ali Siddiq]

Now. Now, this is what I do. This is what I will say.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Stock car driving.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Now, black people that's listening.

[Michael Turley]

Yes.

[Ali Siddiq]

White people have been hiding a gym from us. I went to Daytona before. The only time. Danica Patrick, she started race. That's the only time I went. And it is a plethora. Fellas, listen to me. Don't take you. Don't take your wife. Listen to me. Yes, it is a plethora of shorts and boots. It's shorts and boots everywhere. And all they do is eat, walk, and jiggle things. Go, go. Walt Frazier let me. When I went. When I went, Walt Frazier was there. He has a car. He's. He's in the car.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is he a black guy?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

He needs to own it, man. He needs to wrap that gold. And he needs Dayton on the side, and he needs fake wire wheels on his stock car because real wire wheels wouldn't hold up to that speed. But he needs to own it.

[Ali Siddiq]

TI Was there. That's funny as hell. He said he did gold with date.

[John Clay Wolf]

Going 240 miles an hour.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, it was one car. It was one car in the back.

[John Clay Wolf]

They've already got knockoffs on them stock cars. When they swap the tires. Go ahead.

[Ali Siddiq]

Everybody was going through.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Room. And we rooting for the last call. He come back. He's like, yo, that's how it.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's right.

[Ali Siddiq]

The last car.

[Caller]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

And then the. And then when the pace car came out, y' all thought it was the cops coming to pull his ass over.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yo, the, the intensity, though.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, man, it's high, dude.

[Ali Siddiq]

People don't know. These are a lot of ex athletes, ex football players that's doing the. Changing these tires. The man, the dude told me, this guy told me I've been ran over at least 16 times.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

He say the key to not dying is getting your feet off the ground. He said, ali, listen to me. I've been ran over several times. The car come in here in the front because he has to go around. He's got to go around. He comes in and he said, my, my skill set is I can get my feet off the ground fast. And I just roll over top of the car. 16 times. Getting your feet off ground. I already know I'm dead. I'm dead. First time I'm dead. I'm dead. Like, yo, Ali didn't make it. His shoes are still on the ground.

[John Clay Wolf]

Jeff and Conroe 06 Lexus LS430 with 108,000 miles is worth about $6,000. You there?

[Caller]

Yeah. I mean, that's what I was curious about.

[John Clay Wolf]

Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Russell and Decatur. An 06 Hyundai. We don't want to waste the radio time with a Hyundai. Just go to givethevin.com and load that up. If you got a Ferrari or a big old redneck diesel truck, something pretty, call me. 06E350 David in California. Good morning. What city in California? Bakersfield. 06E350 with 78,000 miles. What color?

[Caller]

It's white.

[John Clay Wolf]

White. White cars bring a little bit more money. And that ain't a racist deal. It's true. They do just like, like gay men. I'll pay more for a gay man's car than I will straight. They're clean, man. They're clean. Are you straight or gay?

[Caller]

It's, it's, it's, it's good. It's, it's been my family's, man.

[John Clay Wolf]

I didn't want to know about all that. Okay. I'm, I'm going to be a five or six grand player. Go, go to givemetheven.com and load it up. My name is John Clay Wolf. We buy cars in the air. We'll be right back. Yeah, we're back.

[Radio Announcer]

Back to the John Clay Wolf Show.

[John Clay Wolf]

See, when you come out of those up temple numbers, man, it's impossible to make those transitions.

[Radio Announcer]

800, 800 radio. And now, senor Juan Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

I can't believe it. J.D. what? We have a car and the man lives in the state of Oklahoma. And it's under 200000 miles.

[Michael Turley]

Visiting.

[John Clay Wolf]

He must be visiting. Scott, good morning. You're on the air.

[Caller]

Good morning.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hey, you've got a 14 charger? SRT8.

[Caller]

Yeah. 13.

[John Clay Wolf]

They didn't make a SRT8 charger in 13. They made a Challenger.

[Caller]

You're a Challenger. I'm sorry.

[Uncle Roy]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is it yours or your or your or your step boyfriend?

[Caller]

Yeah, it is mine. I used to have a charger. So that's why I said okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

So do you have a title to this car? Is there a payoff?

[Caller]

Yes, there's a payoff.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. How much is the payoff?

[Caller]

28, 000.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, you're a little bit flipped. I think the money on the car. Does it have a sunroof? No. What color.

[Caller]

It is dark blue with one gray stripes.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. It's okay. B5 blue. The light blue in that car is better. Loser blues. I'm a 24 grand guy on that rig. So you're 4,000 in the ditch. You got a $4,000 check to write. I mean, are you sitting on four, four bills that you can knock it out with? I'll make the payoff, but I'm gonna need a little support from you. Okay. We lost him.

[Ali Siddiq]

800.

[John Clay Wolf]

800. 7, 2, 3, 4. Matt in Houston. Good morning.

[J.D. Ryan]

Brutal.

[John Clay Wolf]

Matt, what's wrong?

[J.D. Ryan]

My phone.

[John Clay Wolf]

Today. Matt in Houston, can you hear me? I do not have him. So I'm gonna put Matt on hold. DJ Fluff. Matt, DJ is our in house fluffer. And see if he can. If he put his beer down and get back on the phone. Brian. 07 Ram 3500. He's close to the Oklahoma border. So it's got 177,000 miles on it. That's what happened. When you get too close to that border. It jumps up a hundred thousand miles automatically. So be careful about that. And call your manufacturer and ask them why that happens. 07 Ram 3500. Dually diesel. Four wheel drive, mega cab average. Rough or clean?

[Caller]

It's clean.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Is it a resist all or just a laramie or a SLT with leather add?

[Caller]

It's a laramie 07.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is it a 5, 9 or a 6? 7 inch. That's good. Listen, the way they say that they know they got them something.

[Ali Siddiq]

5 9.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is there any other kind? Does, does, does, does, does, does, does 17 000. Buy it.

[J.D. Ryan]

17.

[Caller]

No, actually my payoff is 18.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, well, I think I can get. I'm real close to it. Go to give me the vingivein.com. take some pictures of it. Take a picture of that driver's seat. Are you a fat man or a skinny man?

[Caller]

Man, I'm. Well, I'm 6 foot 1 and 200 pounds.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, you're fine then. The seats ain't going to be all blown out like. Like you got some big old gal driving all that you got. I mean, it matters, man. You got a £300 guy in a car and he drives it for 170,000 miles. You got to throw the seat away.

[Michael Turley]

Sure, Mason, but it's worn out.

[John Clay Wolf]

No, you're all right. Yeah. Let's get a pictures of the thing. I'd like to buy it from you if you'd like to sell it. Sell that. Sell that. Richard and Austin A15GS Lexus F Sport. What color?

[Caller]

Black.

[John Clay Wolf]

Does it have a sunroof? Most of them do. Very few of them do not.

[Caller]

Yeah, it. This one's got the heads up display. I got the power trunk. I got the Mark Levinson. I got the rear steering. It's got about 3,000 worth of options that a lot of them don't have. I've seen.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is it an all wheel drive?

[Caller]

It's got the. No, it's a rear wheel drive. I just put a brand new Michelin Pilot sports on.

[John Clay Wolf]

Michelin's a good brand.

[Caller]

Got a ceramic. It's got a ceramic coating. And. And here's the kicker. You ready?

[Uncle Roy]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm sitting down too. Go ahead.

[Caller]

I'm. I'm gay, so. No, it's clean.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's good.

[Uncle Roy]

All right.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm lubed up. Turley, Turley, Turley, Turley. You're pushing it too far, son. You're pushing. Anybody listening that just heard that Drop Charlie played? I'll die on the sword for that. We did not condone that. Okay. I don't know. With it being this nice, is there any way I can see pictures of it?

[Caller]

Sending some pictures.

[John Clay Wolf]

I would like to see some pictures.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Take some shots. Take some snaps. Go to givemetheven.com. load it up. And is it an F Sport the look or is it F Sport the real, the engine?

[Caller]

It's not the. It's not the GS F. It's the. The GSF Sport.

[John Clay Wolf]

So it's like an M Sport, not an M5?

[Caller]

Yeah, I got the. The 3.5 V6 in there. They don't have that. That 5.0 V8 in there. It's. You know, it's the one. It's.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Like you were saying, it's the.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, it's like you bought the Versailles. It's like you bought the Louis Vuitton glasses. You didn't buy the luggage.

[Caller]

Yeah, I like, but I did. I didn't go fake Louis Vuitton. You know what I mean? I've seen. I've seen where some people, they. They rice it up real bad. You know, they put the. The fake Brembo brake, you know, caliper covers on.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's like Sam Moon stuff, you know, that ain't no good. You got a real car, and I want to look at it. Give me. Go to givemetheven.com and load it up. Matt. Houston, a 15 Wrangler Unlimited. Rubicon hard rock with 427. 15 with 27. I take it it's a hard top.

[Caller]

It is a hard top. Yes, sir.

[John Clay Wolf]

What city?

[Caller]

Black for the body.

[John Clay Wolf]

What city you be staying in?

[Caller]

Houston.

[John Clay Wolf]

Houston. Do you know Ali Sadiq, the comedian that's on with us right now?

[Caller]

What's that?

[John Clay Wolf]

Have you ever heard of Ali? He's a Houston man. A comedian from Houston. He's made y' all famous. He's the biggest thing that's come out of Houston since Beyonce. Never trust a man from Houston.

[Ali Siddiq]

Houston.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. We bought Beyonce's daddy's Bentley. I mean Rolls, by the way.

[Caller]

Oh, okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

And sure enough, it had a little edge to it. You know, they were all excited about it being Beyonce's. It's. It's titled in Music City Productions or whatever and everything.

[J.D. Ryan]

Oh.

[John Clay Wolf]

I was like, hang on, hang on, hang on. Did anybody ask if this thing's nice? Because her daddy's kind of had a rough road. He might not have done all the services.

[Michael Turley]

And what happened?

[John Clay Wolf]

Sure enough, it had little issues. It had little issues. So just because you're buying a car from Beyonce's daddy, don't assume that it's just the best one on the market.

[Ali Siddiq]

It's Beyonce, Dad. It's not Beyonce. It's Matthew.

[John Clay Wolf]

There's a difference. Matt, go to get. He tried to manage you, too, huh? Go to. Matt, go to. Go to givethevin.com Loaded if I want to buy this thing. One more real quick. Take another call, then we'll get back to partying. Bill, Louisiana. Good morning on the air.

[Caller]

Hello.

[Uncle Roy]

How you doing?

[John Clay Wolf]

Good.

[Bobby Brown]

Good.

[John Clay Wolf]

Go Tigers.

[Caller]

Nope, not for me.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, what you got?

[Caller]

I was just getting a little pat on the back for a successful purchase with you guys.

[John Clay Wolf]

What did we buy from you?

[Caller]

It was a 2013 Ram2500 Laramie.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cool. Did Strip Club DJ himself come pick it up.

[Uncle Roy]

Negative.

[Caller]

I had to bring it to you. I do a little drive, but it was worth it.

[John Clay Wolf]

All right. Did we. Did you shop us around? Did we beat the others like we promised? We will?

[Caller]

Yeah, actually, I was actually gonna go to CarMax and all that crap, but I've been listening to you guys for a while and shot it up on your. On your website. You guys gave me exactly what I was looking for. I had to bring a couple bucks to the table, but I wouldn't be able to get what you guys gave me with the General Public or CarMax. So.

[John Clay Wolf]

Perfect.

[Caller]

Successful purchase in about three days. You guys had it in hand.

[Uncle Roy]

I had.

[Caller]

You had to take a little bit for the bank account to clear. I'm sure people were scared of that, and I was a little bit scared of that. I actually made a couple phone calls, but you guys are good on the phone. They told me, yeah, your payoff's coming. It came, and I'm already in another truck, so.

[John Clay Wolf]

Perfect. Well, they get scared because it's a. It's a sight unseen deal. We're virtual company. But even if you go to any dealership, we still got to mail that check to the damn bank. And they're going to sit on it. They're not going to go quick. It takes us three weeks to get a title out of a bank, maybe four.

[Caller]

Yeah, that's what. That worried me a little bit. It was my first time dealing with it, and I. I'll say I'm impressed. And that's what people are going to be scared about the most, is waiting to see that check. It does take a minute, but it pays off.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, well, that's where the payoff. Yeah. And I appreciate it. And now we. We're actually opening a new facility in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, on airline. And we're gonna have a check printer right there on bank of America. Because we were doing this bank that nobody is called. It was Southwest and then Simmons bought them. And everybody's like, who the hell, Simmons? And we're buying cars in California and they're like, you're doing a bank on Arkansas, man. I was like, hey, we got to switch banks.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

So we switched banks to bank of America. But just typically typical when you got a big brand, then they do it their way. They're. They're about a day slower on clearance, surprisingly enough.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah. Anyway, thank you, sir. The check cleared, everybody. That is. That is the beginning of a good Confucian safe, quick, pay equal. Long time, friend. My name is John Clay Wolf, we're going into hour number four. We're gonna lose the the buzz in Houston, but you can jump over to 97.5 ESPN in Houston. Parks Houston, you can pick it up. And anybody else go to the stream@john claywolf.com and you can stream our number four or grab the podcast here. Will be up about one o'.

[Bobby Brown]

Clock.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're going to have more with Ali. My name is John Clay wolf. Go to givemethevend.com Thanks.

[Radio Announcer]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemetheven.com.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ali, you gonna sing along.

[Ali Siddiq]

You know, this is my song.

[J.D. Ryan]

Alan Jackson, I wouldn't have picked this.

[John Clay Wolf]

What do you mean, J.D.

[Bobby Brown]

Why would you pick it?

[J.D. Ryan]

What does that mean?

[John Clay Wolf]

Now what makes you love this song, man?

[Ali Siddiq]

Anytime somebody say hoochie coochie, I'm in. If you say that on the song I'm in, you should go platinum just.

[Michael Turley]

For saying hoochie coochie. But he mentioned that. It did.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, it did, man. Alan Jackson was my dude, man.

[Michael Turley]

Really?

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, man. I like country music.

[John Clay Wolf]

I think if, if we do this Luke and Bach thing, this TV special, Ali Sadiq live from Luckenbach. We need to have a country artist warm up for you.

[Ali Siddiq]

Oh, for sure. What about Shania Twain, man?

[John Clay Wolf]

She's still cute. She's hot.

[Michael Turley]

More than cute.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is she, is she like Canadian and Chinese? She got her Indian. She got some, she got some Jumbli and her, you know, she's all mixed up, but it turns out good.

[Ali Siddiq]

Sometimes it, it just reminded me of something that this dude got mad at me about. He asked me who was the, the sexiest first lady. And I said, laura Bush. He's like, what? I'm like, no, Laura Bush is hot.

[Uncle Roy]

I'm like.

[Ali Siddiq]

Laura Bush is one of the best. She was one of the finest first ladies got. Look at her. Laura Bush was hot.

[John Clay Wolf]

Tagla and Houston and Good morning. You're on the.

[J.D. Ryan]

She made some pretty daughters.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[Uncle Roy]

Hello.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hello. How are you doing, mother? I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. Your name is Tagla. Okay. What have you got? Tagla? Listen, I want to tell you a story first. My wife and I, we, we go to buy bucket of chicken last night. Okay? We're very happy. We love chicken, you know.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

And my wife, my wife, she opened.

[Caller]

A bucket of chicken and the chicken fly out.

[John Clay Wolf]

It plucked me in my eye. The chicken was going crazy. It's going crazy in my car. We, we. I don't know about all that hang On. I got. I got a professional chicken right here that can straighten all this out. Cluck, get over here. Cluck. Cluck Norris.

[Bobby Brown]

Gotta explain who.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cluck Norris. Cluck Norris is our in house rooster. He fights. Yeah, Cluck. Cluck Norris. And he fights chickens in Louisiana and Oklahoma. He's the reigning champ and he protects us and he goes with Uncle Crazy Chicken. He's a crazy chick. Cluck. Good morning.

[J.D. Ryan]

When you gonna need me to help with your security?

[John Clay Wolf]

You are the. You. You. You get paid like you're the head.

[J.D. Ryan]

I know about these people. Call on the telephone, got a chicken in a bucket. Ain't no way to treat no hand. And besides, yeah, I'm offended by the taller chickens in a bucket.

[John Clay Wolf]

What kind of.

[J.D. Ryan]

This is that man that called you just now? On my bad list. He's on my bad list.

[John Clay Wolf]

John Cluck. It reminds me, one time I was at a basketball game with this gal and I was bitching about the seats being too close to nothing of leg room. And she said, well, there's figured all the tall talented brothers would be down on the court.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, that's right. She had that figured out. But you don't put a hand in a bucket. You make that eye contact and you speak and you make love to the hen. Because my name is Cluck.

[John Clay Wolf]

And you, I'm here to get out. No, I know why you're here. I know why you're here and I'm glad you're here. I'm glad, glad you're here. Roy, we need to talk to you, sir, when you get a chance. Come here, please. We got to straighten something out.

[Ali Siddiq]

He fight other chickens in Louisiana.

[John Clay Wolf]

We keep it real, we keep it regional, we keep it fun. So. So, Roy, I don't know if you've met Ali. Ali, Sadiq, this is my uncle Roy.

[Ali Siddiq]

How you doing, Uncle Roy?

[Uncle Roy]

I'm good, I'm good.

[John Clay Wolf]

And I was telling him a story about the. Some of your. Give me your dispatching jobs you got and some of the troubles you have with some of your staff. And I told him the story about the man in the shoe problem. Remember that? Will you please clarify that? You can. You can tell it your way. I wasn't there. You were there.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, you know, I had a guy, you know, he wanted to be homeless, but he wasn't homeless.

[Ali Siddiq]

He want to be homeless.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, he hangs out on the lake every weekend. So one in there, another homeless guy had some shoes, so he pulled them off and got in the lake and then he went and Stole his shoes. But they was name brand tennis shoes. But they was mixed match, you know.

[Ali Siddiq]

One night he wore Reebok.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, yeah. So he came to work that money with the shoes on. I'm looking at his feet, you know, it's cool. He's up and bought him some new tennis shoes. But I didn't notice. I didn't look at him close enough to tell he was mixed, man. And so my, my right arm told me, hey man, look at them shoes again. They mixed back. I looked at them, they was mixed back. So I told him, you know, since he's going to Oklahoma, wasn't nobody gonna notice anyway. So I just sent him over, you know.

[Ali Siddiq]

Now that's funny. Anybody gonna know anyway he going to Oklahoma.

[John Clay Wolf]

But I thought that there was one that he had to spray paint it.

[Uncle Roy]

That, that the next day I told him, tomorrow when you come here, you better have some better shoes on. So I walk, sit down in the next morning he got, sitting there with his leg crossed, man, he had a brand new pair of tennis shoes on.

[John Clay Wolf]

I said, God damn, where he get.

[Uncle Roy]

These God digging tennis shoes at? No, but I ain't say nothing. So junior told me later, he said, man, give me the same shoes he had on yesterday.

[John Clay Wolf]

I said, what do you mean the.

[Uncle Roy]

Same shoes he had on yesterday? Say he was out there on the sidewalk this morning, he spray painted them and they both are the same color.

[Ali Siddiq]

He got one Nike and one filler. But both of them, both of them.

[Uncle Roy]

They look just alike. They look brand new. He played me. He played me like a woo wide guitar. He played me and I couldn't say nothing else. I was gone to work. I couldn't say nothing else.

[Ali Siddiq]

Say, say you, you, we gonna have to get you some glasses on. Cause you ain't noticed that the shoes is Mitch Mac. You thought he got some brains, you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Know, I never know.

[Uncle Roy]

They had the same design but they, but on the back the name was different. The name was different. You know, you never would have knew.

[John Clay Wolf]

You never would have knew.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, the back, the name different.

[Uncle Roy]

One say Jordan, one say Nike.

[John Clay Wolf]

Where do you get these people, Roy?

[Uncle Roy]

I don't know, it just pops up.

[Ali Siddiq]

You just hire who show up?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, they show up, they show up.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, what's your expectations when you're hiring these drivers?

[Uncle Roy]

You know, if I got one can get from point A to point B, I'll give him an eight of them, can't get across the street week.

[Ali Siddiq]

So if I wanted a job just for a week, just for a week, I just wanted to come work?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

For you. For a week?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

What do I have to do?

[Uncle Roy]

Number one, you got to have some driver license. You ain't got to be very smart. Just have some driving license. You got to have some license, you know. You know. You ain't got to think. I do all the thinking. Just do what you told. That's all you gotta do.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm gonna do all the things up. You're gonna do all the things.

[Uncle Roy]

I'm gonna do all the thinking.

[Ali Siddiq]

Don't do no outside.

[Uncle Roy]

Don't do no thinking whatsoever. Every time you think you're gonna screw up, you're gonna screw up. Cause I'm gonna change it.

[Ali Siddiq]

And then you go, look, I already know. You look like you tell people. Ah, I see you thinking, cut that out. Cut that out. Like, thinking that I don't need you.

[John Clay Wolf]

But then they get gamey on you and how. And you always wind up catching them.

[Uncle Roy]

I'll catch them every time one called me, say, I said, where are y'?

[John Clay Wolf]

All?

[Uncle Roy]

Oh, we in Benbrook. I said, man, me and Jigga need some help. Well, we just picking up this car in Benbrook. Me drive. We driving down the street in Dallas off of Lou 12. June said, Roy, that's the van right there. I said, can't be. He just told me he's in Benbrook.

[Ali Siddiq]

Head over there at Church of Chicken. You believe your employees? You told me it can't be.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, it can't be.

[Ali Siddiq]

Put shoes on. And the man just told me he was in British.

[Uncle Roy]

He was in Benbrook. And ain't no way in the world he can get from Benbrook to lose 12. 10 minutes.

[Ali Siddiq]

Not by the time he hung this phone up.

[Uncle Roy]

No, not 10 minutes.

[John Clay Wolf]

The best one, Ali was the guys that went to pick up a truck. Then I see the truck rolling through the auction with black wheels on it, and I'm yelling at Turley, who bought? I'm like, why'd you give that much for that truck with them ugly ass wheels? He's like, it didn't have those wheels on it. So we start digging. We call the customer. He's like, no, it had the 20 inch chromes or 22 inch chromes. And. And we call. You can tell the rest of this story.

[Uncle Roy]

So I called him.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'd say the driver. Rowdy.

[Uncle Roy]

Rowdy. I call Ross and Rowdy, what kind of wheels did that truck have on when you pick up?

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, they were black.

[Uncle Roy]

They were black, you know, And I'm gonna. I'm bucking Turley, you know, because Roddy Ain't gonna lie to me. You know, I thought he wasn't gonna lie. You know, I'm bucking. You know, I'm bucking Taylor. About 20 minutes later, Turley sends me a video.

[John Clay Wolf]

Customer sends us a video.

[Uncle Roy]

Then Turley sends it to me.

[John Clay Wolf]

The video is leaving. Customer's waving by to his truck. Why are guys driving off to it in 22 inch whims?

[Ali Siddiq]

And you trusting? Yeah, yeah. Ain't gonna lie to me.

[Uncle Roy]

The deal is. The deal is, see, Roddy and Turley had it out once, folks. And so turn, it's got it in Ferrari, see? And I'm thinking Taylor's, you know, framing him right now. But every time Turdi send me a video, he said, it's your call. You know, he's totally ready.

[Ali Siddiq]

Now. It's your car, it's your call. It's only your car. That's like, that's what a cartel. That's what a cartel.

[Uncle Roy]

So you gotta fix it. So the next day he come here. I had to farm. I had to.

[Ali Siddiq]

You had to.

[Uncle Roy]

I had to. I had to.

[Ali Siddiq]

Did it hurt you?

[Uncle Roy]

He gonna ran me up in the corner. He ran me slap up in the corner. And then Rowdy lied to me. Yeah, you don't lie to me because I'll catch you. Yeah, I'll stay woke all night to catch you. Don't lie to me.

[Ali Siddiq]

I don't do it right.

[Uncle Roy]

If you was at the bar drinking, say I'm at the rebar where I have me a drink, I'm good with that. But if you say I'm across town somewhere and I catch you at the bar drinking, you're in trouble.

[Ali Siddiq]

You're in trouble.

[John Clay Wolf]

And do you remember how we got the wheels back?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah. Yeah. He called me one morning about two days later.

[John Clay Wolf]

I put some heavy heat on him on the radio.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, he throws some heat. He called me, he said, roy, you at the office? I say, no. He said, well, I went back down there to the customer and I told him I had the hell on wheels. Wheels. John put a body on me, and the customer gave the wheels back. I said, you gonna bring. No, my dad was gonna bring him. So his dad brought the wheel. He didn't never show up no more. He told, but y' all don't know. He called me about three weeks ago and asked me for his job.

[John Clay Wolf]

That should be the third time back.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, I didn't text him back. I didn't text him.

[Ali Siddiq]

You, you.

[John Clay Wolf]

We got the wheels and tires.

[Ali Siddiq]

You got the wheels and tires. And he wanted his job back.

[Uncle Roy]

But I called him and asked him, I said, you know, I'll save your tires back. See what he did. He had two trucks. He took the tires off of his old truck and put them on a new truck.

[Ali Siddiq]

And you gonna sell him his tires back?

[Uncle Roy]

Because I had them. He got one truck at the house sitting on the ground.

[Ali Siddiq]

So, Rowdy, gotta call you. Now, look here. I got a truck that's on the ground. Need my tires back. That I tried to swipe out for your tires.

[Uncle Roy]

Now, he wasn't that big. He wasn't that big. He's still lying. Say he didn't take the tie. But I went by his house. I know where he stayed. He stayed there in the hood.

[Ali Siddiq]

Y' all know a lot of information.

[Uncle Roy]

Oh, yeah, that's my job.

[Ali Siddiq]

It's a bounty out on you.

[Uncle Roy]

That's my job.

[Ali Siddiq]

Rowdy, look it. Listen, HR This HR Here. You're not getting your job back. It's a bounty on you. You got a truck on the ground. We got your tire. We gonna sell you ties. We just know that. We gonna sell you.

[John Clay Wolf]

We're selling to somebody. It's either you or somebody else.

[Ali Siddiq]

Somebody. The ties are getting sold right at the point. Now, either you can make an offer. You know what I'm saying? Go to. What's the vin?

[Uncle Roy]

Go to the.

[Ali Siddiq]

On the vin.

[John Clay Wolf]

Give me the vin.

[Ali Siddiq]

Give me the vin. And send a picture of the ties that you used to have that we got right now and send a bid in for him. We'll sell you something back.

[J.D. Ryan]

Unc.

[Ali Siddiq]

Unc, you rough on him.

[Uncle Roy]

And, you know, I'm kind of cool with that. Cause we see, we live in the same city. He live on one side of the freeway, and I live on the other side. I live on the good side, though.

[Ali Siddiq]

I can tell you live on the good side because your truck ain't on the ground. They don't allow that in your home.

[Uncle Roy]

My truck ain't on the ground? No, no, we don't play that over there.

[J.D. Ryan]

We don't play that.

[Ali Siddiq]

You don't play that?

[Uncle Roy]

No, we don't play.

[Ali Siddiq]

Put your garbage can out of plain sight. We need that. Out of plain sight. You got a man with mismatched shoes. Do you have any women drivers?

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah, I got one I caught asleep yesterday.

[John Clay Wolf]

What was that?

[Uncle Roy]

Let me tell you this right here.

[Ali Siddiq]

You got her asleep. Was she driving or was she on?

[Uncle Roy]

No, she was in the back. She was supposed to be working, but she wasn't. She was taking a nap.

[John Clay Wolf]

This all happened when we took him to hourly when we had them paid by the job. It was a better. It was a better concept.

[Ali Siddiq]

She sleep with somebody?

[John Clay Wolf]

That's a while. Yeah. Yeah, but that's somebody's sister, right?

[Uncle Roy]

Huh?

[John Clay Wolf]

Is that somebody's sister?

[Ali Siddiq]

No.

[Bobby Brown]

No.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, I don't. I want you to see the picture so you can see the dude with the seat belt supporting his head. He got the seatbelt. Trying to. He ain't got no headrest.

[John Clay Wolf]

Will you put that picture on the John Clay Wolf show page on Facebook? So all of our listeners don't understand what we have to deal with to get all your cars picked up. That delivery part is the hardest part of this whole deal.

[Caller]

Him.

[Uncle Roy]

I'm so glad you know that.

[Ali Siddiq]

I want this. The show I want to do. I want to show up to get the cars with people. Hey, you sold your car with. With this strange person with mix Max shoes, picking your car up. Do you trust us right now?

[John Clay Wolf]

I'll tell you who they trust. They trust Uncle Roy. He flies into Corpus Christi one morning to pick up a Corvette, and he walks in the place, and old lady's in a negligee wanting him talk.

[Uncle Roy]

Hey, man, I had to hear him get out of there, man.

[Ali Siddiq]

You had to hurry up and get out.

[Uncle Roy]

Hurry up and get out of there. Just.

[Ali Siddiq]

It looked like a bad situation, but that ain't it.

[Uncle Roy]

Was in the house.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, I already had my meat out.

[Uncle Roy]

I just.

[Ali Siddiq]

I zed up and backed out of that thing. Oh, that's crazy.

[John Clay Wolf]

But this ain't the Uncle Roy I know and love.

[Ali Siddiq]

Why?

[John Clay Wolf]

Why did you tuck tail and run?

[Uncle Roy]

Oh, you know that.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ain't you that age, you know, age.

[Uncle Roy]

You know, it tells. It do a little something to you. Yeah, your nerves get kind of weak.

[John Clay Wolf]

You know, but you were out of town.

[Uncle Roy]

But the deal. Yeah, but the deal is, if I get in the bind down there, I'm down there by myself.

[Ali Siddiq]

You know something? Age do play a major role. I get when I'm doing something wrong, I always think I'm gonna die. It ain't nobody gonna be. See, I'm gonna die right here. Ain't nobody gonna drag my body nowhere where I can at least have a good story like me.

[Uncle Roy]

Back in the day, I let turtle drive his vet home like that, I'd have been cruising that bit. You know what I drive now, the reckless thing. We got a sonata 160,000 miles on. I don't want to attract nobody's attention.

[John Clay Wolf]

The player still got the game, but you don't want the game coming to you.

[Uncle Roy]

I don't want the game coming to me.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. There's something to think about. If you got game and you'd like to sell your car, obviously we'll come pick it up and they'll have matching shoes. My name is John Clay Wolf and we buy cars on the radio. Go to givemetheven.com from the Wolf radio studios.

[Radio Announcer]

It's time for the John Clay Wolf show.

[John Clay Wolf]

I don't want nothing to do that radio. I love the to it.

[Uncle Roy]

They're hilarious.

[J.D. Ryan]

I love it.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you go to bed with is your butt, you wake it up in.

[Michael Turley]

The morning with a sp finger.

[Ali Siddiq]

That's Confucius.

[Radio Announcer]

Call John toll free. Cheap bastards. 1, 800, 800 radio.

[John Clay Wolf]

Watch your nuts all the time.

[Michael Turley]

Wake me up before you go.

[John Clay Wolf]

Go now.

[Radio Announcer]

John Clay Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

That was uncle Norman with the itchy butt confusion thing, wasn't it?

[Ali Siddiq]

He's the one.

[John Clay Wolf]

Pete and Beaumont, good morning. You're on the air. Pete. Pete, Pete. 07750 li. So you got the long body BMW. So so many of these cars. And don't say it doesn't talk to me about the truth. Does it have any smoke rolling out the tailpipes?

[Caller]

No.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. Because they're bad about it.

[Uncle Roy]

Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

All right.

[Caller]

And no, I have no problem.

[John Clay Wolf]

You didn't have to put in that smokeless oil or any of that funky stuff in it to make it quick.

[Caller]

It. Nope.

[Uncle Roy]

Good.

[John Clay Wolf]

How long have you had it?

[Caller]

Since 08.

[John Clay Wolf]

Good, good, good, good good, good. 84,000 miles. If it's a nice one and it's a real one. Does it have any, any lights on saying fix me or is everything ready to go?

[Caller]

I had everything checked out. There was, there was like a, a check engine. Not the check engine but the, the little, little like engine looking. And so I had them, I had them check it out and they said.

[Uncle Roy]

That it was just a module.

[Caller]

I had that replaced.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah. O2 sensor, something like that. Yeah. We had, we had a Bentley that did that the other day. Cost $2,000 to fix a stupid ass oxygen sensor that gray. When I showed y' all two grand to change the sensor. Anyway, this is a $4,500 car.

[Caller]

4,500 mm. Okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

Up to five. Go shop me around. Go shop me around. Go to give me the VIN after other people tell you that. And the reason that the market's low on them is because nobody trusts the damn mechanic ability on them. They can't keep them running. But I mean I know how does a car go from 90,000 to 4,500 you had.

[J.D. Ryan]

I mean, you.

[John Clay Wolf]

You've just experienced it. 8008-0072-3480-0800 radio. DJ Pre K. What up? What up?

[DJ Pre K]

What's the damn deal now?

[John Clay Wolf]

We did a GoFundMe for you to pimp your Cadillac.

[DJ Pre K]

Yes.

[John Clay Wolf]

We raised 1650 from loyal listeners. JD is, is. Is the trust executor. Executor of that money. Have you released any of DJs money yet?

[Uncle Roy]

I have not.

[Michael Turley]

He's not brought me any receipts.

[John Clay Wolf]

So. Dj, why are you not pimping your ride? I went through all this trouble to get this thing done. You've done nothing, man.

[DJ Pre K]

It's hard to find the time to do it, man. I've been so busy buying up all these cars, you know, and shopping at the mall and stuff.

[John Clay Wolf]

At the mall.

[Ali Siddiq]

Would you like to hand your donations over so I can fix Pimp Out My Truck. I want to get my truck.

[DJ Pre K]

We might have to start another GoFundMe for that one.

[John Clay Wolf]

Have you even started shopping for parts yet? We need a Simcom top. We need the date. We need all the stuff. I mean, what. I mean, let's get to work. I didn't do all this for nothing.

[DJ Pre K]

Oh, yeah, we've been looking into the Gucci vinyl, you know, okay. Figuring out, you know, what kind is the best kind to roll with, you know, because we, we don't want to get no second grade knockoff Gucci, man. We want the, the top notch knockoff Gucci.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ali, I brought, I brought you in here. Ali Sadiq, the comedian. And by the way, he's playing at the Improv in Dallas tonight and in Austin in two weeks at the Cut Club or what's it called?

[J.D. Ryan]

Cap City.

[John Clay Wolf]

Cap city. So DJ Pre K. I don't. Do you have any DJs? Music. Turley Handy. He's our in house white, black guy.

[Michael Turley]

Yep.

[John Clay Wolf]

And I would like. I would like for you to give him a ghetto quiz to see how deep he is down in his soul, okay? Because he claims. See, you can do it. I. I don't know the intricacies. Like, I know the cars. I. I can do the broad strokes, but I don't know the real stuff, okay? This guy, I mean, he's got more black in him than he looks.

[DJ Pre K]

Hey, we bout it, bout it, baby.

[Ali Siddiq]

Bout it, bout it. What did that originate at? What is that slang? Original.

[DJ Pre K]

Man, that's. That's some gnarl and stuff right there. Shout out to, you know, all my. No people, you know, Magnolia and Caliope.

[Ali Siddiq]

And all that Magnolia and Calio.

[John Clay Wolf]

Do you want. Let us know when you have his track ready? But. But give him a few quizzes. Let's. I want to. I want to test. This is like bringing an antique to that antique show and they're inspecting it for authenticity.

[Ali Siddiq]

Like what is that? Pawn.

[John Clay Wolf]

Pawn Stars or Antique Road?

[J.D. Ryan]

Ghetto Road Show.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, this is the Ghetto Road Show. Hey, let's get it.

[Ali Siddiq]

No, you could be kind of like light skinned, like a Elder Boys type. So this is a quiz on how black are you.

[Bobby Brown]

So here's an example of his music. This is actual song.

[DJ Pre K]

Now I'm Lifted. Y music never sounded better. Young man living life to the.

[John Clay Wolf]

Does that need to be sped up a touch?

[Ali Siddiq]

No, that's. That's Chop the screw there.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

All right.

[Bobby Brown]

He's stunting in that parking lot.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. All right. So we're going to play the game show right now. It's time for your favorite game show. How black is DJ Prek?

[Ali Siddiq]

How black is dj? Cuz you. I think you more hood than black. I just think you just kind of hood.

[DJ Pre K]

Yeah. If the question is how black am I? The answer is going to be zero percent.

[John Clay Wolf]

How black is DJ Pre K's soul?

[Ali Siddiq]

We're gonna go, how black is your soul? Let's get it. Okay. Who came up with the phrase is dynamite, man?

[DJ Pre K]

That was J.J. walker, baby.

[John Clay Wolf]

All right, y' all know I know.

[DJ Pre K]

Good times hanging in the tailline.

[Ali Siddiq]

Who were the black children that was being raised by a rich white man that we all love? What was the name of that show he talking about?

[DJ Pre K]

Different Strokes.

[John Clay Wolf]

There it is.

[Ali Siddiq]

There it is. Okay.

[DJ Pre K]

Rip Gary Coleman, man.

[Ali Siddiq]

RIP Gary Coleman. This is my last question. How black are you? It's deep. I'm going deep in this blackness.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay.

[Ali Siddiq]

Do you prefer Eddie Kinnison, James Brown or Marvin Gaye?

[DJ Pre K]

Oh, man, here we go. You know, I'm a smooth kind of player. I mean, you can't fade what James Brown did. But I gotta go with Marvin Gaye, man. I'm a smooth player like that over Eddie Kenison, who.

[Ali Siddiq]

See that? Eddie Kinnison is a. One of the originators of black soul. This is why most black men wanted a Cadillac Seville.

[John Clay Wolf]

Eddie.

[Ali Siddiq]

Eddie Guinness had a green one. All he had fur inside. This was fur. Really ball on the rim and it was fur inside when you put your feet in mink. And he used to wear his shirt all bloused open, you know what I'm saying? All the way down, one button at the bottom.

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Smooth pants. No belt. No belt. Loops Just smooth pants. One little bitty tiny pocket. See this pocket on the D that really came for Eddie Kennedy. I don't know how much money. They didn't carry no money on it because that's the littlest pocket in the world. You can't even put your finger in this pocket. You can't get tight.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, key pocket.

[Ali Siddiq]

Your soul is pretty black, though.

[John Clay Wolf]

I appreciate that. While we're on the DJ pre K subject, we need to play that game. You want to do. What did he buy or what were they on, Turley? Oh, let's do. I got a good.

[DJ Pre K]

What were they on that I've been sitting on?

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay.

[DJ Pre K]

All right. Because we. We gonna read a story and y' all can guess what the person was on when they committed this here crime. All right, so we got a man out in Oshkosh, Wisconsin, Johnson. If that tells you anything about, you know the kind of person. We got a wife beater running rampant, and our suspect was being served on a domestic abuse charge and violation of a restraining order, AKA the trailer park two step. But the coppers just can't find the boy. They checked the crib, they checked his favorite bar, but the man was shaking the Jakes for a solid 18 days before they found him at the airport. Only thing is, your boy was already in a plane taking off when they found him. So they try and get him to stop, but of course he's flipping the bird and saying, you'll never take me alive. All this.

[John Clay Wolf]

But time, time, time. Was he flying it or was he riding?

[DJ Pre K]

Oh, he was flying that thing.

[John Clay Wolf]

Damn.

[DJ Pre K]

He was in it to win it.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay.

[DJ Pre K]

And so he's flown off and two hours later and 40 miles away, the pilot crashed into a good old Wisconsin corn field. And the cops were able to grab him, take him to the hospital with serious but non life threatening in injuries. Which just goes to show when you beat on your boo, the world has a way of beating your ass back. So what do y' all think? He was on 18 days.

[John Clay Wolf]

Did you say 18 days?

[DJ Pre K]

Shook the feds for 18 days, man.

[Bobby Brown]

And then got in a plane and flew it for two hours trying to get away.

[John Clay Wolf]

What's that stuff that you said? You dip and smoke and it's all weird?

[DJ Pre K]

Oh, Sher.

[John Clay Wolf]

Sher.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, Wet daddies. He was on.

[J.D. Ryan]

He was.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm going to go with that.

[Bobby Brown]

You going with a wet daddy.

[Ali Siddiq]

Going with the sherm.

[J.D. Ryan]

No, you. You'd never evade the authorities for that long.

[Bobby Brown]

Stay up that long.

[John Clay Wolf]

But he didn't stay up for 18 days. He was staying on the move.

[Bobby Brown]

He was moving for 18 days. He was on that. He was on that white stuff.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yeah, just good old cocaine. Straight Pablo's best.

[Michael Turley]

No, I was going to take a step back and go with meth.

[Bobby Brown]

Oh, meth.

[Ali Siddiq]

You going to go with meth?

[John Clay Wolf]

That's the easy way out.

[J.D. Ryan]

Over your shoulder. There's a lot of being awake. There's a lot of watching that corner from the motel window. At 18 days. That is a meth amphetamine binge right there, man. And steal a plane.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yes. Lisa De. What is your. What was he on?

[Ali Siddiq]

I'mma go with meth, cuz. See the still in the plane got. At first, I was gonna say crack. I say, nah, that. That was. That's not enough focus. We on crack.

[John Clay Wolf]

Right, right, right.

[Ali Siddiq]

Method death. Yeah. You stole a plane.

[John Clay Wolf]

You think you can fly?

[Ali Siddiq]

First of all, you stole a plane with. Could he fly or was this like.

[Michael Turley]

Apparently not.

[Ali Siddiq]

How long did he stay in there?

[John Clay Wolf]

That's a very good question.

[Michael Turley]

Hang on.

[John Clay Wolf]

That answers everything. How long was he in the air? Do you know?

[DJ Pre K]

This might change it because. Yeah, this was his plane.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay. And he's a white guy for. I'm gonna go with Turley. I'm gonna say he was blown out on coke and he crashed.

[Michael Turley]

Yeah, I'm gonna go with his own plane.

[John Clay Wolf]

That's weird. If he owned a plane and he flew it a long time, but he crashed it. Well, now, why did he crash? Does anybody know? Did he run out of gas? Well, we just don't know.

[Ali Siddiq]

Was he flying? Doing coke at the same time?

[J.D. Ryan]

He been awake for 18.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, so we got meth, we've got crank. We got. No, no crank. Crank's that cheap stuff you said the wet daddy. So what? It doesn't say what kind of plane, does it? Because I know planes. That would. That would. I could categorize it deeper. Nothing about what he was driving. No other clues.

[DJ Pre K]

It was just a little. Little personal plane, you know, but it's an Oshkosh, Wisconsin. Oshkosh, Wisconsin.

[John Clay Wolf]

Farm fields. All right, lay it on us.

[DJ Pre K]

Well, y' all off today, man. Upon further investigations, they found empty gin bottles in the crash claim.

[Ali Siddiq]

No.

[John Clay Wolf]

Why didn't we think of that? Just an old white guy on a damn booze ass bender. Roy would have taught. Roy would have caught that. Yeah, Roy would have caught empty gin bottles. Gin will get you high, man. Jen is a different kind of drunk gin. I've been told that I'm not the nicest guy around. When I'm drinking gin. Can't imagine. By the women in my life, I can't imagine. So I try to lay off. Actually, I had some the other night. Gin. Yeah, I would drink beer and then I had a gin and it just threw me wrong. I actually fell down. In fact, I got a scratchy little scrape of my arm.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, it just threw me wrong. That's just honest.

[John Clay Wolf]

Everything was good until I had that damn GT tonic. That GT with two limes.

[Uncle Roy]

Because you had a great time.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, we've got Satan here with us. Good morning, Satan. I did. He was the one coaching me. But I was saying if I just stay with this beer. Nobody respects a drunk. A drunk. That being drunk's no good. Being buzz, you know, we all do it. But. But you know that. That drunk. What is that? Satan? Why do you do that to us?

[J.D. Ryan]

I'll call you one better, John.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay.

[Uncle Roy]

Nobody respects a beer.

[J.D. Ryan]

If you're gonna drink, do it right. You've always got me on your side with Jen. I'll keep an eye out for you. What could possibly go wrong?

[Michael Turley]

Everything.

[J.D. Ryan]

You don't have to drive anywhere. You don't have to be anywhere.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, you could crash your plane.

[J.D. Ryan]

Wait until Saturday. About 9:30 in the evening, the kids put to bed and just blow it out.

[Uncle Roy]

Out, man.

[J.D. Ryan]

Just blow it out. And don't worry about buying expensive gin. Go with the Amsterdam.

[Ali Siddiq]

There we go.

[J.D. Ryan]

It's really nice.

[Uncle Roy]

Great. Premium price. And.

[John Clay Wolf]

Hey, I just. I just got it. I just got a text message from Rush Limbaugh. He's listening to us. He wants us to dial in, but. Charlie, hit the ISD in pot. Bring Rush back up.

[Uncle Roy]

Taking my fire again.

[John Clay Wolf]

Rush Limbaugh, good morning. Did you have some input on this topic, sir?

[J.D. Ryan]

John.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[J.D. Ryan]

You were just talking to Satan.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yes, I was talking to Satan.

[J.D. Ryan]

What kind of show is this? I. I'm shocked.

[John Clay Wolf]

Well, he comes about once every week.

[J.D. Ryan]

Well, we haven't been on the same show since, gosh, the. The pack back in 1997.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, really?

[John Clay Wolf]

Sure.

[Bobby Brown]

All right.

[J.D. Ryan]

That was. That was a time. Listen, don't sign anything, okay.

[John Clay Wolf]

With sign. Okay.

[J.D. Ryan]

He's a hell of a negotiator.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, you're signed up with him.

[J.D. Ryan]

And by the way, he's right about gin. I love it. A couple of Percocets in the morning, French toast, a glass of gin, grapefruit juice, maybe two glasses. You gotta have a good breakfast, JD Gin for breakfast. And that's how we do it here at the Excellence in Broadcasting Network. Talent on loan from God.

[Ali Siddiq]

We'll be back.

[John Clay Wolf]

Uno momento. Four, four.

[Radio Announcer]

And now back to the John Clay Wolf show, presented by givemetheven.com.

[John Clay Wolf]

DJ Prek, I have a ethnicity quiz for you.

[Michael Turley]

Close enough.

[John Clay Wolf]

How many members in Earth, Wind, and Fire?

[DJ Pre K]

Earth, Wind, and Fire. Man, there's at least like, 40, ain't there?

[John Clay Wolf]

Right?

[Michael Turley]

That's right.

[J.D. Ryan]

The proper term is undetermined.

[Michael Turley]

Which show?

[John Clay Wolf]

Good morning. Last segment. Party's almost over. Speaking of Earth, Wind and fire, these flat Earthers, Kyrie Irving came out this week talking about flat earth, denouncing his flat earth claims. Charlie, what's that all about? Yeah, he. I don't know, man. He's.

[Bobby Brown]

He must have been smoking something because he just said he was claiming that the earth is flat. This is a big star in the NBA. Kyrie Irvin. He's got a movie out, Uncle Drew.

[Michael Turley]

So he's promoting a movie. So he's trying to get some attention.

[John Clay Wolf]

I don't know if that's what the.

[Bobby Brown]

Reason was, but here's what. He's denouncing it now.

[John Clay Wolf]

Okay, at the time, I was, like, huge in the conspiracies. Everybody's been there. Everybody's been there, like, yo, what's going.

[Ali Siddiq]

On with our world? You know, like, you click the YouTube click, and it goes like, how deep.

[John Clay Wolf]

The rabbit hole goes. It's like, yo, you start telling all.

[Ali Siddiq]

Your friends, like, yo, did you see that? Did you watch this video?

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm telling you, I'm sorry about all that. You know, for all the science teachers, everybody coming up to me, like, you know, I got to reteach my whole curriculum. I'm sorry. I apologize. I apologize.

[J.D. Ryan]

That's crazy.

[John Clay Wolf]

So he. He did say it was. The earth was flat. Now he says it's not.

[J.D. Ryan]

As late as. As late last year, he was saying, you know, flat earth theory.

[John Clay Wolf]

These people are serious.

[Michael Turley]

Yes, but have any of them actually gone to the edge and taken a snapshot? I mean, hey, look.

[Ali Siddiq]

Google it.

[J.D. Ryan]

We got pictures from space, man.

[Michael Turley]

Oh, those are all made up. Those are all made up.

[John Clay Wolf]

But.

[Michael Turley]

But they've never found the. What they call the edge. Go.

[John Clay Wolf]

Go hang out. What's up with the NBA player? I mean, just shoot the damn ball. And. And do what? Stay out of that. That's none of your business now. I mean, if you're going to be an NBA player and use your power to do something, do it like Shaq. Sell some chicken. Seriously? Yeah. Listen to this.

[Ali Siddiq]

That's great. When you're hungry and on the run, you want your chicken from a Guy, seven foot one.

[John Clay Wolf]

The chicken empire is here. Is this real? This is real, yeah. Oh, have you heard of this?

[Ali Siddiq]

No, I have not. Because I would have protested, man. I don't like black people selling chicken. I just don't like you promoting chicken. You. Because the song is so cheesy. You want to run your chicken from a 7 foot one? I'm done.

[Bobby Brown]

But listen again.

[John Clay Wolf]

Is this real? Yes.

[Ali Siddiq]

You want your chicken from a guy seven foot one?

[John Clay Wolf]

It's Shaq. The chicken empire is here. That is called selling out.

[Michael Turley]

You know, they were so drunk.

[John Clay Wolf]

Kenny roast. Kenny Rogers Roasters was one thing, but this is taking it to a whole new level.

[J.D. Ryan]

And you can watch it. It starts today on Facebook.

[John Clay Wolf]

Watch what starts?

[Ali Siddiq]

Did he say buck? Buck?

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah.

[Bobby Brown]

Brock.

[John Clay Wolf]

Brock, yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

So where.

[Uncle Roy]

Where.

[John Clay Wolf]

If you want some Shaq chicken, where do you go get it? It.

[Bobby Brown]

It's called Chicken Shack.

[J.D. Ryan]

Shack. It's in Las Vegas.

[Ali Siddiq]

Oh, no.

[John Clay Wolf]

In Las Vegas.

[Ali Siddiq]

In Las Vegas.

[John Clay Wolf]

We have a new location in Las Vegas. So his first place is Chick. Is you kidding me?

[Bobby Brown]

I'm not kidding you.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, he said, does it open today?

[J.D. Ryan]

Yeah, it starts today on.

[John Clay Wolf]

On.

[J.D. Ryan]

On Facebook.

[John Clay Wolf]

I'm reading it on the news.

[Michael Turley]

Well, he's probably running out of money.

[John Clay Wolf]

I doubt it.

[Ali Siddiq]

Shaquille, I hate you for this.

[J.D. Ryan]

This one.

[John Clay Wolf]

Really?

[Ali Siddiq]

And I know you. Like, I know you personally. You know, I know you Shaq personally, and I hate you for this one. Yo, did you say buck? Buck on the end?

[Michael Turley]

He did.

[Ali Siddiq]

I'm mad at you, Shaq. And when I see you in Houston at your 24 Hour Fitness in Pal Land, right down the street with my. When my lady sell you another suit, I'm telling you, I'm gonna be. I'm gonna come up there. I'm coming up to men's warehouse, and I'm gonna say, buck, Buck in your face. I'm Shaq. I am calling Robert Young. You know, our mutual friend. I'm gonna tell you. Did you say buck Buck on the radio for a chicken Ad? Shaquille. Mr. O', Neal, my friend, first of all, you owe me a thousand dollars. Let's get that. Let's get that.

[Michael Turley]

Why does he owe your friend, yo?

[Ali Siddiq]

Because let me tell you, our mutual friend, Robert Young, right? Shaq. Sex in the barbershop in. In Robert's Young Salon. And he's new. His album came out. The Shack Food or whatever that was, right? He telling me, oh, my album is crazy. You gonna love every song on my album if you don't.

[John Clay Wolf]

Yeah, if you don't.

[Ali Siddiq]

I Give you a thousand dollars. I didn't like not one song on the album.

[Michael Turley]

That's probably 11, 000 bucks.

[Ali Siddiq]

So he owed me a thousand dollars.

[Michael Turley]

At least a thousand.

[John Clay Wolf]

So what is, is he a promoter of? I mean, what is he, the Don King of comedy? He's always there in the front row and he's always presenting this.

[Ali Siddiq]

The Shaquille. Now I' ma say this. The, the Shaq all star thing did catapult a lot of comics to a, to another level. Kevin Hard, Tom Davidson came back out with that. Dion Cole. It's a lot of people came off the check also. They never picked me.

[Caller]

Me.

[Ali Siddiq]

They never picked me. Which is fine because I don't do a lot of low hanging fruit, which is cool.

[John Clay Wolf]

For people who just tuned in, we've got Ali Siddiq in the, in the house with us.

[Ali Siddiq]

And so Shaq, you know, he was showing up to the shows, he was putting the shows on, he was doing them, doing All Star Weekend, which blew everything up. Now you can't find a good Shaq all star thing because I think they. You can't find a good comedy platform, period, because people are not picking people who are, who have more than three minutes. Like, it's a lot of fluff out there. Like, you'll see a show and you don't realize that the person been on there for like five minutes. A five minute set on the TV where they edit you down is not an hour special. It's not 30 minutes. You know, it's not even giving you a good idea who this person is. But Shaquille is one of the most entertaining people that has ever came out because I watched him with Shaq versus when he was just doing everything and like, it was crazy. But the shack off stalls is a good thing. But now I'm so offended by Shaquille. This is, this is on the level of I'm still mad at anybody who eat at Bojangles chicken in the airport. The fact that it's called Bojangles is what's turning me off. The chicken may be delicious.

[John Clay Wolf]

I mean, what's their, what's their mascot? A rebel flag?

[Ali Siddiq]

I don't know, but it's called Bojangles. I'm like, no, I'm out now. Shaquille o', Neal, Chicken Shack. I'm done with you because you said bug buck.

[John Clay Wolf]

Listen.

[Michael Turley]

Here we go.

[John Clay Wolf]

The chicken empire is here. Hey, I've only got two minutes left, but I want to ask you a couple of questions. So you're a professional commander meeting you're currently in the space. You're doing a great job. Who that's currently working? Who are your top three that are currently working? I'm going to ask you the same thing for not currently working.

[Ali Siddiq]

Currently working. Chris Rock, D.L. hughley. And I'm going to go with Michelle Wolf.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, the gal that did the correspondence dinner.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah. I like Michelle.

[John Clay Wolf]

That was pretty salty.

[Ali Siddiq]

I like Michelle.

[John Clay Wolf]

So let's go all time.

[Uncle Roy]

All time.

[John Clay Wolf]

And I think Chris Rock falls in that too, too.

[Ali Siddiq]

All times is going to be for me. All times. Favorite comics.

[J.D. Ryan]

All times.

[Michael Turley]

Yep.

[Ali Siddiq]

We're going to go number one.

[Uncle Roy]

Yep.

[Ali Siddiq]

Dick Gregory. Number two. Don Rickles. Number three. Yeah. Don Rickles.

[Uncle Roy]

Yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Number three has nothing to do with his comedy. Loved his comedy. But he was a great person. Rodney Dangerfield, really awesome, great person. Did you great person meet him? No, no, I'm just know what he did. For other comments, he could have just literally just did his show himself. Yeah, but he just brought out everybody else. Seinfeld, Roseanne Ball. He just brought. He just opened up his platform to all these other comics. And in this business, which is a very selfish business, you don't get a lot of that.

[John Clay Wolf]

Right.

[Ali Siddiq]

And I can mention Phyllis Dilla and other great comics that I, that I grew up watching everybody on he haul. You know, this is where I got my comedy from. I didn't like. People say I watch Richard Pryor. I. I listened to three Richard Pryor albums growing up. You know, Blacksmith, Bicentennial and super. You know, a lot of these words can't say black.

[John Clay Wolf]

That guy's crazy. And I had that guy's crazy when I was four in my room and my parents didn't know I was listening to it. Yeah, but you know the COVID of the album like that.

[Ali Siddiq]

Yeah, and. And it was, it's. He had some great albums, but.

[John Clay Wolf]

And Robin Williams too.

[Ali Siddiq]

Robin. Robin Williams. But you gotta forget Steve Martin.

[John Clay Wolf]

I love Steve Martin.

[Ali Siddiq]

I grew up looking at these people and like Hee Haw. I thought I was funny because of He Haw. He Haw's one of the funniest shows in the world to me.

[John Clay Wolf]

And then some hot women too.

[Ali Siddiq]

And some hot women. Now my favorite show with hot women of all time, Beanie Hill.

[John Clay Wolf]

Oh, yeah.

[Ali Siddiq]

Oh my goodness. This is my porn growing up. It's like my Playboy. But I couldn't wait till my mother went to sleep like, yo, Benny Hill is on. He doesn't even say nothing.

[John Clay Wolf]

Like run around neck television.

[Ali Siddiq]

I love Benny Hill, man. RP Benny Hill I like, you know.

[John Clay Wolf]

I Went and saw Carlos Mancini. We had him on the show about four years ago. And I went and saw him. He was tight, he was good.

[Ali Siddiq]

He's in town now, is he? Yeah, he's at Arlington. He was, bro.

[John Clay Wolf]

Like tonight, yeah.

[Bobby Brown]

Really?

[Ali Siddiq]

He's in town.

[John Clay Wolf]

So you're against him tonight? You're in Dallas, he's in Arlington.

[Ali Siddiq]

It's not against. People gonna go see him. They gonna go. This is what I tell people. I'm not in the business of you can't do things at the same time no more. Because unless you have. How many people in Fort Worth, Dallas, Fort Worth?

[John Clay Wolf]

6 million.

[Ali Siddiq]

6 million? Unless you have a 6 million seater, I'm not in competition with nobody. You gonna go see who you want to see? No, no, the six million seater is open tonight. No one wasn't going anywhere.

[John Clay Wolf]

Ali, we appreciate you coming.

[Ali Siddiq]

Oh, man, thank y' all for having me.

[John Clay Wolf]

Had a lot more fun than I was planning on. And everybody else, thanks for tuning in. Remember, the podcast goes up about 1 o'. Clock. We will be back next Saturday morning.

[Michael Turley]

8Am Texas, Oklahoma, tied up 10, 10 right now.

[John Clay Wolf]

Good, good. California, Vegas. We didn't touch talk to y' all much today. Of course we're thinking about y'. All. And give me the vin.com. if we don't beat your CarMax offer, we will send you a check for $100. But if you want to just save all the trouble, just go to givemetheven.com put it in and our buyers, like Ed, will call you back, hopefully if he's not taking the baby to school. But actually we've got the system built where it'll kick off from him and go to the next guy. So they will get back to you immediately. And we would love to buy your car. That's what we do. We buy several hundred a week. And we'll be back next Saturday to do our radio thing, podbean, your message amplified. Ready to share your message with the world. Start your podcast journey with Podbean. Podbean, the AI powered all in one podcast platform.

[Bobby Brown]

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[John Clay Wolf]

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