The John Clay Wolfe Show #191 – 03.23.19

Aired: February 16, 2026
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Co-Hosts: JD Ryan, Michael Turley, Bobby Brown
Featured Characters: DJ Pre K, Rush Limbo, Keith Richards, Randy the Chipmunk, Satan, Johnny Football, and more

Episode Overview

This episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show delivers the show’s signature blend of irreverent, free-wheeling talk about cars, sports, wild personalities, music, and modern life—with plenty of laughs, running gags, oddball callers, FCC-dodging humor, and real-time car bidding thrown into the mix. Today, the team riffed on everything from March Madness brackets, NFL fandom crises, and Vince Neil’s infamous live singing, to crazy Florida crime stories and the etiquette of buying/selling used cars.

Key Topics & Segments

1. Celebrity Drop-ins & March Madness Mayhem (00:34–08:19)

• Keith Richards (impersonation) joins the crew, riffing on March Madness bracket confusion and sharing ludicrous British road stories and old romances.
• The group trades jokes and banter about sports fandom, with recurring jokes about Keith's bad bracket picks and odd advice.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • “I've got to be me. And I'm in a hurry because I’ve got to make new March Madness bracket.” — “Keith Richards” (01:54)
  • “She wasn't easy on the eye, but you shouldn’t talk about her like that, mate. She's still a lady.” — “Keith Richards” on St. Mary’s (03:06)

2. The Great “Backup NFL Team” Debate (07:15–11:47, 67:20–74:49)

• John agonizes as a disillusioned Dallas Cowboys fan, polling callers and the crew for which NFL team he should “cheat” with as a backup.
• Options (and jokes) range from the Browns and Rams to the Raiders (soon moving to Vegas) and Saints, with colorful input from listeners and characters.
  • “I need a side bitch so I can care when another game's on.” — John Clay Wolfe (08:36)
• Call-ins from all over the U.S. add opinions, with mentions of NWA, Eazy-E, and the Raiders’ “gangster” reputation.
• Notable picks: Raiders for “gangster” appeal and Vegas trips, Saints for proximity, Chiefs for exciting play, Browns for the up-and-coming factor.

3. Real Talk: How to Sell Your Car Live On-Air (14:20–17:43; throughout)

• John fields live call-ins from listeners looking to price or sell their vehicles, showing off his rapid-fire car appraising expertise, skepticism, and blunt honesty.
• Running gags about “boobs” as a selling point in both waitressing and car sales.
  • “Does this car have boobs? Does it have the look? Okay, I'll give $10,000 then. If it doesn't... I'll give seven.” — John Clay Wolfe (16:15)
• He discusses how trust and honesty are key, and voices suspicion at callers who seem to embellish (e.g., the Porsche seller).

4. Viral Meltdowns and Customer Service Gone Awry (24:43–31:20, 45:59–48:15)

• The saga of a customer who flaked on a car deal, lied, then blasted the show with bad social reviews. John and the team air it out and stand their ground, publishing the social media spat (with customer’s phone number) online.
  • “Listen, lady, I am corporate. I own this thing. There is no... it’s all me.” — John Clay Wolfe (27:24)
• Lively discussion about running a business based on trust, not just transactions.

5. The Vince Neil “Trainwreck” Performance and Music Riffs (33:22–38:58; 108:27–110:34; 151:29–152:06)

• The infamous, unintelligible Vince Neil live vocal from Rock in Rio 2015 is roasted repeatedly, with jokes about Bob Dylan, drugs, and stroke-like singing.
  • “[Vince Neil] sounds like Bob Dylan channeled into Vince Neil’s soul.” — John Clay Wolfe (34:09)
• Music nerd sidebar: best classic rock singers, nostalgia for ‘80s and ‘90s bands, and playing bits from callers and young guitar prodigies.

6. Comic Characters & Callers

• Regulars like “Satan,” “Randy the Chipmunk,” and “Rush Limbo” appear, lampooning rock stars, politics, and pop culture.
• “Drunk Ass Don” becomes a show MVP—checking in drunk throughout the episode, nailing an impromptu National Anthem (123:34), and supplying unscripted comedic gold.

7. Florida Man, “What Were They On?” and “White, Black, Latino, or Other?” (41:08–43:14; 118:00–120:40)

• DJ Pre K runs wild with offbeat Florida crime stories, encouraging the team to guess the drug or ethnicity involved.
• Hilariously detailed story of a naked bongo player eating ramen in an after-hours break-in.
• Jokes about stereotypes, delivered for laughs but without malice.

8. Pro Tips for Car Sellers—and “Trust” as a Business Creed

• John’s rules for honest car appraisals, why miles and condition matter, and the hazards of over-expecting value.
• He points out the under-appreciated process of buying (and appraising) used cars live, sight unseen, based on trust over hard contracts.

9. Odd News & Pop Culture Bits

• The Mueller Report, barroom sports Olympics, March Madness pool struggles, motley business pitches for Slim Jims and vegan snacks.
• Ongoing talk about minor league football’s struggles, the need for a better NFL farm system, and Johnny Manziel’s next comeback play.
• Tales from the Bunny Ranch brothel, pineapple-swinger signals, and musings on European happiness vs. American hustle.

10. Notable Callers & Listener Engagement

• Callers from all over the map ask about car values, football teams, and random topics.
• Listener “Drunk Don” moment: Flawlessly sings the National Anthem live while hammered (123:34–124:41).
• Ongoing threads woven with running jokes about “Oklahoma trucks with 300,000 miles,” customer reviews, and car salesman tall tales.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "I need a side bitch so I can care when another game's on." — John Clay Wolfe on why he wants a second football team (08:36)
• "You don't want to be the guy that buys [boobs]. You want to be the next guy. They get so proud of them, they show them to everybody." — JD Ryan, on buying “assets” (18:14)
• "Listen, lady, I am corporate. I own this thing. It's all me." — John on dealing with a dishonest customer (27:24)
• "Vince Neil sounds like Bob Dylan channeled into Vince Neil’s soul." — John roasting a disastrous Motley Crüe clip (34:09)
• "I was. I was thinking I would like a little more heroin at the time." — “Keith Richards” on recording “Tattoo You” (100:18)
• “Drunk Ass Don” flawlessly singing the National Anthem while wasted (123:34–124:41)—the show’s “better than Vince Neil” moment.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:34–08:19] – Keith Richards’ bracket woes, March Madness, old romances
• [07:15–11:47], [67:20–74:49] – Backup NFL team search: Cowboys heartbreak and listeners’ suggestions
• [14:20–17:43, throughout] – Live appraisals and car talk
• [24:43–31:20, 45:59–48:15] – Customer review saga, on-air business ethics
• [33:22–38:58, 108:27–110:34, 151:29–152:06] – Vince Neil “Babble” segment, music discussion
• [41:08–43:14, 118:00–120:40] – DJ Pre K’s “What Were They On?” and “White, Black, Latino, or Other?”
• [123:34–124:41] – “Drunk Ass Don” sings the National Anthem (high point!)

Character/Caller Highlights

• Keith Richards – “I’ve got to be me!”; struggles with NCAA brackets and wild anecdotes (00:54–08:14; 100:18)
• Drunk Ass Don – Hilarious multiple call-ins, especially singing the National Anthem (123:34–124:41)
• DJ Pre K – Engages in “What Were They On?” and “White, Black, Latino, or Other?” crime games
• Satan, Randy the Chipmunk, “Screwed up” Car Sellers – Satire, impressions, and running bits about vice, gambling, and car value inflation
• Regular Listeners – From Oklahoma, Virginia, DC, Nevada, more: offer opinions, tell stories, and banter with the crew

Tone & Style

The show combines Texas-flavored, no-nonsense humor and straight talk, intentionally “unfiltered” takes on pop culture, cars, sports, and human antics of all kinds. Everyone is fair game for ribbing, including the hosts themselves—and the wild, loyal audience that frequently becomes the show’s best material.

For New Listeners

You don’t need to care about cars or be a Dallas Cowboys fan to enjoy the ride. The John Clay Wolfe Show is a blend of comedy, music commentary, radio theater, old-school shock jock, improv, and good-natured ribbing—all spun up by a sharp, sarcastic host with an ear for nonsense, a knack for business, and a soft spot for wild callers and misfits.

Want to sell your car? Join in on the jokes? Or hear a drunk Texan outsing a rock star? This episode is prime John Clay Wolfe: odd, honest, and above all, a hell of a lot of fun.

Complete podcasts, show links, and more at: John Clay Wolfe Show Facebook and johnclaywolf.com