The John Clay Wolfe Show — Episode #70 Detailed Summary
Date: February 12, 2026
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Powered By: GiveMeTheVIN.com
Overview
This episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show delivers a wild, freewheeling blend of car talk, irreverent humor, improv, and satirical takes on current events. As usual, John and his crew (Bobbo, JD, Turley, and a range of guests and "characters") discuss everything from car valuations and dealership stories to politics, classic rock, Halloween, and high school football. Unfiltered, rapid-fire, and not afraid to flirt with the edge, the show puts comedy and real-deal car business side by side for a loyal, engaged weekend audience.
Key Discussion Points & Segments
1. Road Trips, Sleep Deprivation & Infowars
- [01:18] John shares tales from a recent, sleep-deprived Louisiana road trip, including flipping on a podcast of Infowars due to a lack of radio reception. This segues into riffing on conspiracy media, namely Alex Jones:
"You may think it's crazy... ask yourself why we can't buy .22 long rifle ammunition anymore." — Bobbo [02:17]
- Turley recounts a friend's experience working for Alex Jones: "He literally, when he walks outside, he looks up at the sky to make sure there's no one spying on it." [02:28]
2. The Great San Antonio "Mexicans Hate You, Bobbo" Text Bit
- [03:13–04:36] Bobbo confronts John about a joke text, prompting a rapid volley of banter about San Antonio, radio affiliates, and edgy, politically incorrect humor. John's response to Bobbo’s query about not being on air in San Antonio:
"'Cause Mexicans hate you, Bobbo." — John [03:53]
- The crew riff further, poking at both themselves and radio stereotypes.
3. Teasing Guests & Upcoming Segments
- FBI agent set to discuss the "email situation" (satirical segment, not a real agent)
- Tony Romo’s dad, Randy the Chipmunk, and Reverend Charles mentioned as upcoming guests, all played for comedic effect.
- Car culture chat: DJ Pre K, the white intern from Azel, is brought in for car banter and jokes about rims, hood culture, and generational differences in taste.
"When I say Mali, you say boo. What's up?" — John [07:07] Forgiato wheels are valued at $2–8k each; jokes about leaving expensive wheels on cars overnight in dodgier neighborhoods.
4. Car Dealing Stories — The Harsh Reality of Junk Cars
- [10:03–14:31] John recounts a story of hiring a promising new buyer who bought a $200, 240k-mile Dodge Stratus at auction—exemplifying beginners' mistakes and how "junk" cars just drain time and money:
"Cars are disposable... if you don't believe me, go down to the metal smelter." — John [13:27]
- Trucks, however, retain value much better, no matter the miles.
"Trucks will fully depreciate down to like $500 and never go below it..." — John [14:28]
5. Car Valuation Live Calls & Sharp Negotiations
- A significant chunk of the show comprises callers asking for real-time offers on their cars. John's style is quick, blunt, and a little gruff, providing honest offers with little sympathy for emotional sellers:
"Does five grand work?" — John, to a Silverado seller [20:32] "If you inherited [a classic] that's the only way I'll buy it from you. If you built it, I don't want it." — John [23:49]
6. Flying Cars and Future Promises
- "Uber wants flying cars" leads to a top 10 list bit (which John immediately rejects as boring), and "grab them by the wizard" style jokes lampooning current events and language sensitivities [24:24-25:29].
7. Classic Car/Truck Trends, Market Insight, and Dealer Reality Checks
- John explains the market for various vehicles, emphasizing how cars drop in value over time while certain trucks hold value. He illustrates the cold reality of "commodity" pricing in his business.
"They're liquid commodity assets to us..." — John [30:44] "Gays have the cleanest cars in the world... I will give more for a gay man's car than I will a straight man's car." — John [31:10]
8. Halloween Satire — Reverend Charles Sermon
- [42:03–45:32] The character of Reverend Charles delivers a gospel-style sermon about the "evils of Halloween," blending Southern Black Church parody with biting commentary on candy, tradition, and holiday spectacle:
"These pagans back in the day, back in northern Scotland... send their little ones out to beg the forgiveness of the nature spirits that they worship." — Rev. Charles/Bobbo [43:30]
9. Sports & High School Football
- [38:15–39:10] Bobbo's son’s senior night, district standings, and brief World Series talk. John hopes for a Charlie Sheen cameo as "Wild Thing".
10. Intern Spotlight — DJ Pre K
- Ongoing banter pokes fun at DJ Pre K’s persona as a "white, black kid" from Azel, and explores family, racial/cultural identity, and food traditions, all in a tongue-in-cheek, self-aware style:
"What’s your favorite flavor of Kool Aid?" — Bobbo [41:14]
"Either red or grape." — DJ Pre K [41:18]
11. Satirical News & Improv Segments
- "Special Agent 9133 OU812" (voice-disguised, falsified FBI agent) reveals ludicrous "inside info" on Hillary Clinton's emails in a deadpan mock-investigative style, lampooning election-year scandals [101:04–103:11].
- Rush Limbaugh, Tony Romo’s dad, Rusty the Squirrel—each is performed in parody or as a quick-hit comic bit, letting the cast riff on current events, sports, or audience questions.
12. The Business of Car Buying — John’s Rant
- [147:10–154:40] John vents passionately about loyalty, dealership etiquette, and the pain of having friends approach him for car advice only to sell their cars elsewhere:
"What pisses me off more than anything is when your damn friends come to you and you hold their hand for months on some damn car and you're being nice. ...Get away from me." — John [153:03]
- This sequence is a highlight, capturing John's real feeling for the business and why the show resonates for both car folks and everyday listeners.
13. Car Calls — Market Reality vs. Fantasy
- Throughout, listeners call in wanting more for their high-mileage or customized cars than the market will bear. John gives them quick, unvarnished offers and frequently delivers classic reality checks:
"What's it worth? 500 bucks. ...The Mexicans will buy them and they take them to the border and sell them." — John [133:35]
Notable Quotes & Moments
John on Junk Cars:
"Cars are disposable items. If you don't believe me, go down to the metal smelter and look... I'm setting everybody up. When y' all want to call in this morning with your junk ass car. I'm gonna tell you, you got a junk ass car be. I'll tell you the first right out of the gate. Oh, yeah, you got a junk ass car and I don't want it. You can pay me to take it." [13:27]
Humor on Racial and Car Stereotypes:
"Because Mexicans hate you, Bobbo." — John [03:53]
"Gays have the cleanest cars in the world." — John [31:10]
Halloween Satire:
"[Halloween]... we all go, a lot of big litters do it, though. A lot of animals don't even do it anymore... Sometimes they'll even give them a strawberry. Last year, swear to God, Highland Village, all right, they all got dead crickets. That was a good Nutter ween." — Rusty the Squirrel [91:05]
Car Business Insights:
"We buy and sell cars 500 miles an hour, up and down the highway, all over the place. They're liquid commodity assets to us." — John [30:48]
"Trucks will fully depreciate down to like $500 and never go below it, no matter what they are." — John [14:28]
On Loyalty and Friendship:
"...I wanted to buy American Living Radio Legends car. Right. ...I mean, I really did." — John (about Bob Kingsley) [147:43]
Important Timestamps
- [01:18] John recounts road trip, Alex Jones podcast, and sleep deprivation.
- [03:13] San Antonio radio affiliate/Mexican joke volley.
- [10:03] Story: new buyer, bad $200 auction deal.
- [14:28] Why trucks retain value, even when trashed.
- [20:32] Negotiating over Silverado truck's value.
- [23:49] John’s rules for buying classic cars.
- [24:32] Uber flying cars/top 10 “promises that never came true.”
- [31:10] On why gay men’s cars are the cleanest.
- [42:03] Reverend Charles on "the evils of Halloween."
- [53:03] Rush Limbaugh parody on political scandals.
- [101:04] Satirical "FBI agent" reveals Hillary "email scandal."
- [147:10] John’s passionate rant about loyalty, friends, and car dealing.
- [154:42] Wrapping up: reality of car buying, expectations, and honesty.
Tone & Language
The show’s tone is rowdy, irreverent, and blends hard-hitting reality with playful, sometimes borderline-offensive banter. The hosts are direct—brash with callers, sarcastic with each other, and frequently drop gentle (or not-so-gentle) reminders about the realities of car dealing and life in general. Comedy and unfiltered honesty are the watchwords, and the show’s fast pace leaves little time for self-censorship.
For New Listeners
This episode is a wild ride through the American cultural and business landscape, filtered through the eyes of car dealers, old-school shock jocks, and improv comedians. It's part automotive advice show, part Southern soapbox, all humor—with satirical jabs at politics, pop culture, and every kind of car and truck under the sun.
You’ll laugh, you’ll maybe wince, and you’ll definitely learn just how undervalued that rusty old Stratus really is.
Logo:
The John Clay Wolfe Show — “I buy cars on the radio.”
Listen for...
- Blunt, real-time car appraisals
- Satirical takes on news and politics
- Classic rock and car culture references
- Ongoing bits with a rotating cast of oddball characters
- The heart of a real used car hustler—funny, sharp, but trustworthy when it matters