The John Clay Wolfe Show – Episode #87 (3/11/17)
Air Date: February 12, 2026
Host: John Clay Wolfe
Co-hosts: J.D., Bob, DJ Pre K
Podcast Description: The John Clay Wolfe Show powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com. Every week: cars, sports, sex, drugs, rock & roll, and anything that won’t get fined by the FCC.
Episode Overview
This episode brings the signature blend of sarcastic car-guy banter, irreverent social observations, live “call-in and sell your car” offers, and sidetracked yet highly entertaining digressions about sports (especially the shifting Tony Romo situation), pop culture, and personal shenanigans. Expect some pointed ribbing, outrageous stories about bar fights, and a recurring “Black, White, Latino, or Other” guessing game, all until the last ad jingle rolls.
Key Segments, Discussion Points & Memorable Moments
1. Donuts, Cultural Stereotypes, & Malibu’s Most Wanted
[02:32 – 07:36]
- DJ Pre K brings donuts, prompting John to riff on racial food choices and the “donut shop owner with a Lexus” stereotype.
- John: “Why every donut owner has a Lexus full size SUV?” (03:54)
- Lively teasing about DJ Pre K’s “white black guy” identity leads to jokes about Malibu’s Most Wanted (“Rachel Dolezal,” “Be Rad”-style) tropes.
- John’s show pitch: If you call in with the make/model/miles of your car, he might buy it live, powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com
2. Live Calls: Car Buying in Real-Time
(Throughout; e.g., [07:37 – 25:48], [39:23 – 42:39], [50:28 – 52:01], etc.)
- Dozens of listeners call with cars to sell—John throws out offers, ribbing callers for their high-mileage expectations.
- Memorable negotiation:
- Caller with a 2001 Jeep Cherokee, 108K miles: “Is the paint coming off... or is it just a flying turd with wings?” (08:12)
- John repeatedly asks callers to use the website, criticizing those with unrealistic expectations: “Look at cars like death—when you get one with 180k miles, it’s like marrying an 87-year-old woman. She may be rich, but she ain’t gonna last long.” (32:22)
3. Sports & Scandal: Tony Romo Hysteria
[09:10 – 10:54, 69:19 – 71:19, 103:16 – 108:35]
- John, JD, and Bob dissect ridiculous news cycles about Tony Romo’s future with the Cowboys (release or trade? "Fake news in my sports world!"). (10:13)
- “Are we gonna play Pearl Jam ‘Release Me’ in honor of Tony Romo?” (09:54)
- “Tony Romo’s dad” (Bob, in character as ‘Romero’) drops in with an absurd tale involving IBS, bad videos, and future Romo offspring.
- Top 10 reasons Tony Romo should go to Houston (82:34): “They’ve got that purple drank painkiller!”
- Notable Quote: “No matter what, Tony would rather play golf, but in 11–12 years, watch for a family wide receiver.”
4. Viral Sports Moments & Drug Banter
[11:44 – 15:40]
- Extended riff on Baker Mayfield’s arrest video—laughter over the cop’s “angle tackle,” then a tongue-in-cheek “meth geography” lecture about Oklahoma and Arkansas.
- Bob on meth: “It’s like time travel, you look around, it’s been eight days—you haven’t eaten a bite...” (15:30)
5. Dirk Nowitzki Hits 30,000 Points—Interview with “Dirk”
[27:44 – 31:17]
- “Dirk” (a Bob impersonation) congratulates himself awkwardly, talks about growing up on schnitzel, confusing Mark Cuban with the army, eating Pop-Tarts with a Sam’s Club card, and loving his grandfather’s honor.
- Bob’s intentionally mangled German accent and “translation” by J.D. make the segment a comedic highlight.
6. “Black, White, Latino, or Other” Game
[34:32, 35:29, 150:38]
- JD presents weird crime stories, everyone guesses the perpetrator’s ethnicity. (E.g., Underwear thief named “Nicholas Rojas” turns out to be white; the “arrested guy plugging his mixtape” is black.)
- Later, a motorcycle sex act (Asian), LSD spider hallucination (white), and an oxycodone-for-sex doctor (Other – Indian) keep the game rolling.
7. Fights, Bouncers, and Bar Stories
[43:08 – 52:55]
- Panel recalls bar fights—John’s Tijuana Yacht Club bouncer beatdown ("I was a big defensive end, forgot the bouncer could fight, got choked out and dragged by my feet” [48:20])
- Revelations: “If two grown ass men want to fight, I don’t think that should be against the law.” (46:59)
- Aftermath: “Doesn’t pay to fight,” and “You wind up best friends for life after, that’s how it used to be...” (52:50)
8. Company Infighting, Septic Mishaps & Randy the Chipmunk
[53:40 – 57:03]
- John details a fight between Turley and a driver over “Free Taco Day.”
- Septic tank stories (“We pulled a T-shirt out of a commode”), Roy the uncle as hero.
- Randy the Chipmunk, a recurring character, tells stoned tales about office tiffs, fast food, and hydroponic weed.
- Sheer absurdity: “Y’all had a tiff up here? That’s a good time to pick up snacks in the parking lot.” (54:12)
- Notable quote: “Let me tell you about them grackles. They’ll eat your ass.” (56:34)
9. Car Market & Tax Time: Maximum Values
(throughout, major plugs at [88:03], [90:09], [101:03])
- John repeatedly emphasizes it’s tax refund season—the BEST time to sell your car.
- “Right now, I can overbid cars and get away with it—the market’s there!” (88:36)
- “It’s the highest time of year for us. The more cars, the better!” (88:03)
- Bids: “We pay all the money—2 grand to 200 grand, I’ll buy it.” (26:40, and repeated)
10. Inside Info: Salvage, Flood Cars, Diminished Value
[124:13 – 127:32, 90:09 – 91:32]
- Caller asks about selling a Mercedes with a salvage/recon title after flood damage—John explains “half price for salvage.”
- On accident cars: “car’s worth 20% less on a Carfax if airbags deploy—go to RecCheck.com to get your diminished value!”
- PSA: “Don’t put new motors in old cars. No one cares. It doesn’t help resale at all.” (102:45)
11. Kids Today: No Driver’s Licenses?
[95:47 – 97:14]
- Listeners, hosts bemoan their teenagers not wanting to get driver’s licenses.
- “Kids just Uber. They’d rather be online than behind a wheel.” (96:13)
12. Life, Family, and Politics—A Generational Divide
[140:25 – 144:24]
- J.D. describes dinner with his two sons—one is right-wing, the other a lefty atheist (“like having a gay son we just don’t talk about,” jokes John).
- Bob discusses his conservative dad’s beef with his long hair.
- John on his own dad: “He lost all his money and now blames the world. Probably marching with women in D.C.” (144:24)
Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)
- “Look at cars like death: when you get one with 180k miles, it’s like marrying an 87-year-old woman.” — John (32:22)
- “Are we gonna play Pearl Jam ‘Release Me’ in honor of Tony Romo?” — John (09:54)
- “If two grown ass men want to fight, I don’t think that should be against the law.” — John (46:59)
- “Kids these days, they Uber to school. Don’t even want licenses.” — Caller/John (96:13)
- “Bouncers aren’t bookkeepers. They generally know how to fight.” — Bob (50:19)
- “Only the good... People have more money when tax checks hit. Givemetheven.com is where to sell us your car. We pay all the money.” — John (90:09)
Noteworthy Timestamps
- 02:32–07:36: Donuts, cultural jokes, DJ Pre K’s identity
- 08:53–09:37: Negotiation with car callers—signature style
- 09:41–11:14: Tony Romo trade/release segment: “fake news in sports”
- 12:09–14:27: Baker Mayfield cop-tackle, Oklahoma meth banter
- 27:44–31:17: Dirk Nowitzki “interview”
- 34:32, 35:29, 150:38: “Black, White, Latino, or Other” game
- 43:08–52:55: Bar fight stories and aftermath
- 53:40–57:03: Office fights, septic stories, chipmunk comedy
- 95:47–97:14: Kids today, driver's licenses
- 140:25–144:24: Family dinner politics
Episode Takeaways
- The show is equal parts “car auction radio,” stand-up comedy, and Texas-style morning chaos.
- John’s advice: Sell your car in tax season and use GiveMeTheVIN.com for a competitive offer.
- Memorable games and caricatures (Dirk, Randy the Chipmunk, “Tony Romo’s Dad”) are fan-favorites.
- Underneath the riffing is sharp insight on car values, market timing, and the reality of selling to/with dealers.
Listen for: Combative car sellers, Tony Romo takes, “meth-fueled” geography, why “kids today just Uber,” and why the best trade-in is online, not on the lot. Skip: Ads, musical outros, and PodBean infomercials at show open/close.