The Jordan Harbinger Show
Episode 1225: Penis Size | Skeptical Sunday
Release Date: October 19, 2025
Hosts: Jordan Harbinger & Michael Regilio
Overview
In this Skeptical Sunday episode, Jordan Harbinger and co-host Michael Regilio take listeners on a surprisingly deep, thoughtful, and frequently hilarious exploration of “penis size”—its biological origins, cultural significance, evolution, and the psychological impact size anxieties have on men. The pair bust common myths, offer scientific background, and unpack modern obsessions and insecurities around the penis, blending critical thinking with their trademark humor.
Key Segments & Insights
1. Introduction: Why Are We Talking About This?
[03:19]
- Jordan and Michael introduce the topic with playful banter, highlighting the social ubiquity and taboo surrounding the penis.
- Jordan explains:
“There’s an old saying, you can’t say happiness without saying penis. Which is true...because that’s all we’re really talking about today. Not happiness, the other thing.”
(Jordan, 03:19)
2. Penises in Nature: Evolutionary Backstory
[05:23–13:37]
- The first penis-like organ appeared around 425 million years ago in a shrimp-like creature.
- Not all animals have penises: only 3% of birds, no sharks or spiders, and roosters (male chickens) are literally “cockless.”
- Evolutionary oddities discussed: corkscrew-shaped duck penises, the four-headed echidna penis, sea slugs with disposable penises, and female cave insects with a “penis” structure.
- Barnacles hold the record for largest penis-to-body ratio:
“Barnacle penises can be up to eight times their body length.”
(Michael, 08:29)
3. Human Evolution: Losing the Spines
[10:35–13:24]
- Most mammals have a penis bone (baculum), but humans don’t.
- Some ancestors had spiky/barbed penises, but humans lost those features as part of evolving toward longer, less dangerous, and more enjoyable mating.
- Penis anatomy: root, shaft, glans; erectile function likened to hydraulics.
4. Penises in History and Culture
[14:14–18:57]
- Penises have been depicted since the Paleolithic era (42,000-year-old carved penis pendant).
- Ancient cultures (Roman, Greek, Egyptian, Bhutanese) celebrated and mythologized penises—e.g., fertility festivals, winged penis amulets, and buildings adorned with phallic symbols for luck and protection.
- Jordan shares stories about Bhutan, where phallic art in homes is meant for fertility and to ward off evil.
5. The Obsession With Size: Ancient and Modern
[18:57–24:03]
- Sculpture of David (Michelangelo) deliberately small for virtues like self-control.
- Modern times: penis size anxiety is widespread among men.
6. What’s the Average? Myths vs. Science
[19:32–24:03]
- The average erect length: 5.16 inches (per a 2014 study of 15,000+ men).
- Average girth: 4.5 inches.
- No science supports correlation with shoe size; weak correlation with finger ratios (2D:4D).
- The “grower vs. shower” concept and dangers of buying illicit erectile drugs (Trimix) discussed candidly.
7. Does Size Matter for Sex?
[27:51–34:49]
-
Studies: larger-than-average penises may increase likelihood of vaginal orgasm, but girth is more important than length for more women.
-
Aesthetic appearance often outranks size:
“How it looks might be even more important than how it hangs.”
(Jordan, 30:45) -
Satisfaction stats:
- 85% of women are satisfied with their partner's size,
- but only 55% of men are satisfied with their own.
-
Anxiety fueled by porn: camera tricks (angle, wide-angle lenses, small-handed actors), prosthetics, penis pumps used on set—all skew expectations.
-
“Girl inches”—women’s exaggerated perceptions—are not reliable.
8. The Big Dick Problem
[43:40–54:53]
- Anything over 8 inches is “problematic” (top 0.01%), not necessarily desirable.
- Large penises can cause pain, injury, emotional/sexual complications for partners, and even make everyday activities (like clothing fit) difficult. Some men struggle with intimacy due to size anxiety.
- Oral sex can be challenging or impossible at extreme girth.
- Quote:
“Large penises also have other funny clinical terms like megalophallus, which I think is a great nickname to have—But again I’m trivializing these people’s real problems.”
(Jordan, 45:45)
9. The ‘Small Dick’ Problem: Micropenis
[56:05–58:57]
- Defined as 2.5 standard deviations below the mean.
- Usually hormonal/genetic in cause (e.g., Kallman syndrome, Prader-Willi syndrome).
- Early hormone therapy can help; historically, some questionable suggestions to raise boys as girls for psychological reasons were made, but this is not standard today.
- Empathy emphasized for all sizes and conditions.
10. Circumcision: Culture, History, and Choice
[59:49–66:30]
-
Circumcision’s origins predate religion but became codified in Judaism and adopted in other cultures.
-
Hygiene, status, and (erroneously) masturbation prevention popularized circumcision in the modern West.
-
Rates in the U.S. remain high, debates around consent and religious freedom persist.
-
Michael shares:
“I was circumcised at age 15...I can speak to the pressures a young man feels if he’s different from other young man men.”
(Michael, 60:42) -
Cultural differences ("American vs. European style,” cut vs. uncut) described with candor and humor.
11. Loving What You’ve Got: Key Takeaways
[66:30–67:27]
- “Try and love and care for it, no matter how big or small or curved or veiny or snipped it is.” (Michael, 66:48)
- Focus on health, confidence, and emotional intimacy over superficial concerns.
- The next episode promises a “girthy rabbit hole” on penile enhancement.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
Evolutionary Oddballs:
“The sea slug…detaches and discards his used penis, which he then generates a new one within 24 hours.”
(Michael, 07:53) -
Barnacle Facts:
“That’s like a human having a 50 foot penis…”
(Jordan, 08:35) -
Modern Anxiety:
“Men often internalize insecurity because they think they don’t measure up, literally. And this can cause anxiety and stress.”
(Michael, 32:19) -
Banter About Porn Myths:
“Taking too much Viagra can be highly dangerous…just take the doctor recommended dose.”
(Michael, 55:34) -
On Self-Esteem:
“How is somebody going to love your penis if you don’t even love your penis?”
(Jordan, 32:41) -
On Culture & Shame:
“Bottom line is you’re not weird, you’re not different, you’re not inadequate, no matter what is happening or not happening in your pants.”
(Jordan, 37:35) -
On Peer Pressure & Circumcision:
“Here in the United States… we are the land of the free of foreskin and the home of the bravely chopping them off…”
(Michael, 61:15)
Timestamps by Topic
| Segment | Timestamp | |-----------------------------------------|--------------| | Intro & Scope | 03:19–05:23 | | Penis Evolution in Nature | 05:23–13:37 | | Cultural & Ancient Penis Depictions | 14:14–18:57 | | Obsession with Size: Then & Now | 18:57–24:03 | | Scientific Averages & Myths | 19:32–24:03 | | Size and Sexual Satisfaction | 27:51–34:49 | | Anxiety, Porn, and the Feedback Loop | 32:19–34:49 | | Problems of Both Extremes (Big & Small) | 43:40–58:57 | | Circumcision, Culture, and Identity | 59:49–66:30 | | Key Takeaways & Advice | 66:30–67:27 |
Tone & Style
- Frank and Informal: The hosts approach sensitive subjects with a balance of humor, scientific rigor, and empathetic candor.
- Accessible: Technical details and studies are translated into relatable language, often via banter and analogies.
- Inclusive: Emphasis on normalizing the vast diversity in size and form, discouraging shame, and addressing all listeners regardless of gender.
- Practical: Focus on facts, actionable advice (e.g., avoid dangerous enhancement drugs, value communication and confidence, prioritize health).
Summary for Newcomers
If you’ve ever fretted over penis size, wondered about how it all began, or noticed society’s endless obsession with “bigger,” this episode cuts through the noise. You’ll learn how evolution shaped human (and animal) penises, why most size perceptions are warped by culture and porn, and why appreciation and acceptance are the healthiest approaches. The hosts deftly tackle myths and taboos, anchoring the conversation in science, humor, and genuine self-acceptance.
A fun, illuminating ride down what they cheekily term a “girthy rabbit hole” — setting up their next deep dive on penile enhancement.
[End of summary]
