Podcast Summary: The Jordan Harbinger Show
Episode 1250: Scott Galloway | Notes on Being a Man
Original Airdate: December 2, 2025
Host: Jordan Harbinger
Guest: Scott Galloway
Overview
In this engaging and deeply personal episode, Jordan Harbinger welcomes back author, NYU professor, and public thinker Scott Galloway to confront the multifaceted crisis facing young men today. Drawing from Galloway’s new book Notes on Being a Man, their conversation tackles declining economic prospects, the vanishing of role models, mental health challenges, loneliness, and the societal implications of failing to address the “collapse of young men.” Galloway offers both hard-hitting data and heartfelt personal stories, pairing his typical candor with actionable guidance for men (and those who care about them) in their 20s, 30s, and beyond.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Struggles and Perceptions of Young Men
- Hostile Reactions to the Topic:
Many dismiss the idea of a male loneliness/struggle epidemic as fake, or feel men "deserve it" (03:10, Jordan). - Not About Tearing Down Women:
Galloway reiterates that “female advancement has been stunning” and he’s not attacking women’s progress—"It's not about tearing down the amazing strides that women have made. It's about focusing on the fact that a lot of young guys especially have fallen behind and it's not getting better." (05:39, Jordan). - It’s Not Zero Sum:
“We can recognize the problems [women and minorities] face while recognizing that no group has fallen further faster than young men...We can walk and chew gum at the same time.” (06:29, Galloway).
2. Data: The Shocking Decline of Men’s Outcomes
- 4 out of 5 deaths by suicide are men; men 3x more likely to be addicted, 3x more likely to be homeless, 12x more likely to be incarcerated (06:44, Galloway).
- “One out of three men under the age of 25 are living at home. One out of five men at the age of 30 is living at home. Only one out of three men under 30 is in a relationship...These numbers are at an all time high.” (23:39, Galloway).
- “If a guy hasn’t cohabitated with someone else or been married by the time he’s 30, there’s a one in three chance he’s going to be a substance abuser.” (24:13, Galloway).
- Crisis manifests as rising NEETs (Not in Education, Employment, or Training), withdrawal from relationships, addiction, and social instability.
3. Importance of Male Role Models & Mentorship
- Loss of male role models—through death, divorce, or abandonment—is “the single point of failure” that derails many young men (09:12, Galloway).
- Girls from single-parent homes display similar life outcomes as two-parent homes; boys’ outcomes fall dramatically without a present male role model (09:47, Galloway).
- Galloway’s Personal Story: His own father left at age nine, but coaches, neighbors, and family friends stepped in. “What we need in our society is more of a gestalt of apprenticeship, mentorship...immediately getting men involved in the life of boys when they don’t have male role models.” (13:48, Galloway).
- “In New York there are three times as many women applying to be big sisters as men applying to be big brothers.” (14:31, Galloway).
4. The Vanishing of Male-Only Spaces and “Third Places”
- Shift to co-ed Scouts means loss of single-sex male environments: “Girls get their own single sex scouting. They get Girl Scouts, but boys don’t...Why wouldn’t we also have single sex Boy Scouts?” (15:36, Galloway)
- Advocacy for mandatory national service (military, civil, or community). “If you look at Israel and Singapore, they have the lowest levels of young adult depression because of their mandatory national service.” (19:40, Galloway).
5. Societal Dangers of Alienated Young Men
- “Throughout society, the most unstable, violent nations and periods in history have all had one thing in common: a disproportionate number of young men without economic or romantic opportunity.” (31:05, Galloway).
- Economic instability and loneliness make men more susceptible to radicalization and violence:
“No amount of therapy is going to change that. I keep hearing on TikTok, men can find love from within. Yeah, good luck with that...all of history says one thing—a disproportionate number of men with no economic or romantic opportunities leads to a violent, unstable society.” (33:55, Galloway).
Scott Galloway’s Practical Advice for Men by Decade
In Your 20s (50:22)
- Certification: “Any sort of certification in your 20s—driver’s license, degree, apprenticeship, anything that separates you into a smaller pool—is really valuable.”
- Workshop Careers: “Don’t mistake your passion for your hobbies...your job is to find something you’re really good at.”
- Networking: “Be as social as possible. You want to be put in a room full of opportunities even when you’re not there.”
- Kitchen Cabinet: “Develop a kitchen cabinet of people who can give you no-mercy, no-malice advice.”
In Your 30s (52:20)
- Forgive Yourself: “Most people are way too hard on themselves...it's not too late to go back, start over, or pivot.”
- Geographic Arbitrage: "Ask yourself if you can relocate to reduce economic pressure...Nobody has a birthright to expensive cities if it’s making your life unworkable.”
- Align With Partners: “If you have a partner, alignment around earning, spending, and future goals is key. Economic anxiety is a huge driver of divorce.”
In Your 40s and Beyond (57:57)
- Save Aggressively: “If you haven’t saved a decent amount, you have to start saving money.”
- Emotional Labor & Relationships: “The most devastating thing in your 40s is usually divorce...the best thing you can do for your kids is to treat their mother really well.”
- Be Kinder, Drop the Scorecard: “The biggest unlock for me was to put the scorecard away...not what do I get in return, but what kind of father, friend, coworker, do I want to be?”
- Role Modeling: “They don’t listen to what you say, they model what you do.” (61:46)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
On Blame & Complexity
“The gag reflex is understandable, especially because...to people on I may be the wrong messenger for the message...But now what we’re doing is we’re holding a 19 year old male accountable for my privilege...Same things that benefited me are just not there for a 19 year old male.” – Scott Galloway (04:23)
On Help for Young Men
“The people that are the most concerned about this are mothers of young men.” – Jordan Harbinger (08:30)
On Resilience
"Girls are much more resilient and much stronger than men...for two 15 year olds, both sexually molested, the boy is ten times more likely to kill himself later in life than the girl. There’s no getting around it. Girls are stronger than boys." – Scott Galloway (09:47)
On Relationships and Wellbeing
“It ends up that men need relationships more than women. A woman in a relationship lives longer, 2 to 4 years. A man lives 4 to 7 years longer.” – Scott Galloway (24:13)
On Dating and Gender Roles
“If you split the check, she's never going to kiss you. Because deep down, for thousands of years, she's been taught you can't protect her.” – Scott Galloway (25:41)
On America’s “Watering Seeds” Philosophy
"America works best...to love as many unremarkable kids as possible and try and create as many millionaires and loving households as possible. Not to identify a superclass of freakishly remarkable kids or the children of rich people and turn them into billionaires." – Scott Galloway (34:48)
On the Power of Kindness and Letting Go
“I used to have a scorecard...what kind of son do I want to be? I want to be a generous, loving son. That was a huge unlock for me...Across all relationships, now I just ask: what kind of friend do I want to be?...Hold yourself to that standard and enjoy it.” – Scott Galloway (63:40)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- [03:10] – Hostile reactions to discussions of men's struggles
- [06:29] – Framing the crisis: men’s decline is not zero-sum with women’s progress
- [09:12] – Role model loss as a linchpin issue for boys
- [13:48] – Scott’s personal mentorship stories (coaches, community)
- [15:36] – Debate on single-gender spaces and value of traditional male enclaves
- [19:40] – Mandatory national service as a solution for belonging and maturity
- [23:39] – Startling statistics: men living at home, NEET crisis
- [24:13] – The critical role of relationships for men’s health
- [31:05] – Dangers of alienated young men & social stability
- [34:48] – Metaphor of America “watering many seeds”
- [50:22] – Advice for 20s: certification, networking, workshopping
- [52:20] – Advice for 30s: forgiveness, geographic arbitrage, alignment
- [57:57] – Advice for 40s: financial discipline, emotional labor, modeling good relationships
- [63:40] – Letting go of transactional relationships: “put away the scorecard”
Episode Summary & Takeaways
- The “male decline” crisis is real, measurable, and dangerous — dismissing or shaming it helps no one and threatens social cohesion.
- Role models, mentorship, and structured environments (like Scouts, national service) matter profoundly for boys’ development.
- Economic and romantic viability are essential not just for individual men’s wellbeing but for societal stability.
- The best advice: Develop skills, networks, and self-forgiveness early; seek alignment in relationships; be open to moving; invest in kindness; drop the “scorecard” in relationships.
- Women bear much of the secondary burden — as mothers, sisters, daughters — and their advancement does not have to come at men’s expense.
- Society flourishes when it “waters many seeds,” not just the few that seem exceptional early on.
- Long-term happiness is tied to being generous and having the capacity to love—even more so than simply being loved.
“People who are loved are happier than people who aren’t loved. But the people who are happiest are the ones that find a lot of people that let them love them.” – Scott Galloway (63:40)
Further Resources & Links
- Scott Galloway’s latest book: Notes on Being a Man
- Jordan Harbinger’s Episode Starter Packs and Six-Minute Networking course for building social capital
- jordanharbinger.com/start
- sixminutenetworking.com
Editor’s Note: This conversation dives deep into the roots and remedies of a quietly-growing crisis. Scott Galloway’s candor, real anecdotes, and willingness to state uncomfortable facts make this a must-listen (or thoroughly reviewable) episode for anyone concerned about the future of men—and society as a whole.
