Anderson Cooper & Andy Cohen | Liquor Cabinet

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert

Episode: Anderson Cooper & Andy Cohen | Liquor Cabinet
Release Date: December 5, 2024

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Introduction and Monologue

Stephen Colbert kicked off the episode with his characteristic blend of humor and sharp commentary, addressing recent political and social issues with his trademark wit.

Pete Hegseth’s Secretary of Defense Nomination

Colbert delved into the controversy surrounding Pete Hegseth's nomination for Secretary of Defense, humorously critiquing Hegseth's perceived issues with alcohol. He quipped, “Pete Hegseth’s 12-step program. Step one. Admit that you are powerless over alcohol. Then chug. Chug. Chug. [03:30]” This segment highlighted Colbert’s ability to blend political satire with current events, questioning the suitability of Hegseth for such a critical role.

He further explored the potential replacements for Hegseth, mentioning figures like Florida Governor Ron DeSantis and Iowa Senator Joni Ernst, culminating in a humorous take on Trump’s possible choices. Colbert remarked, “If none of those people work out, Trump can always turn to the anchor of Fox's 3am panel show...," emphasizing the unpredictability and political maneuvering within Trump's circle.

Senate Investigation on Airline Fees

Transitioning to another hot topic, Colbert addressed the Senate’s investigation into airlines' “junk fees.” He mocked the complexities and hidden costs associated with airline pricing, stating, “Junk fees alone allowed airlines to pocket billions of dollars.” By exaggerating the absurdity of airline charges, Colbert underscored consumer frustration with hidden costs in the travel industry.

South Korea’s Surprise Martial Law Declaration

Colbert also touched upon international news, specifically the unexpected declaration of martial law by South Korea’s President Yoon Suk Yeol. He humorously critiqued the timing and execution, saying, “You never make a good decision at 11pm on a Tuesday.” This segment highlighted Colbert’s knack for international political satire, comparing it to whimsical scenarios to emphasize the gravity of the situation.

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Main Segment: Conversation with Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen

The highlight of the episode was the engaging conversation between Anderson Cooper, host of Anderson Cooper 360, and Andy Cohen, host of Watch What Happens Live on Bravo. Colbert facilitated a dynamic and personable dialogue, exploring various aspects of their personal and professional lives.

Opening Banter and Friendship Dynamics

Colbert humorously contrasted the distinct entry styles of Cooper and Cohen, noting, “You enter two very different ways,” eventually leading to laughter and light-hearted exchanges. This set a friendly and relaxed tone for the ensuing discussion.

Experiences of Traveling with Children

The conversation shifted to their experiences traveling with children. Andy Cohen shared his recent trip to St. Louis with his family, while Anderson Cooper recounted traveling to Brazil amidst hurricane Milton. Cooper humorously detailed the challenges, “I was trying everything. And at the worst moment… the flight attendant came and said, do you think he'd like a fruit plate? And I was like, no, I don't,” illustrating the trials of parenting during travel.

Andy Cohen added, “My son knows that the way to get to me is to scream Andy Cohen as loud as he can,” highlighting unique parenting strategies. Their exchanges provided relatable humor for listeners who have navigated similar familial challenges during travel.

Subway Ride Anecdote

A particularly entertaining story emerged when Andy Cohen recounted spontaneous subway rides in New York City. Colbert quipped, “This is like the opening scene of a Law and Order,” as Cohen explained accepting rides from strangers, including an incident where he was handed a joint post-show. Cooper critiqued the logic behind such actions, leading to laughter and playful teasing about Cohen’s spontaneity and desire for content creation.

Reflections on Career and Aging

The discussion naturally flowed into reflections on their careers and the passage of time. Anderson Cooper humorously noted his evolving appearance, “I need glasses and I disappeared. Nobody can see me unless I have dark glass.” Colbert and Cohen built on this, joking about Cooper’s hair going white and Cohen’s photograph-sharing habits, such as their subway photo anecdote.

They also shared light-hearted advice to their younger selves:

• Cohen to his younger self: “Believe it or not, you're not gonna get canceled anytime soon.”
• Cooper to his younger self: “I wish I had thought about… I never thought my hair would actually go all white.”

These exchanges highlighted their camaraderie and ability to reflect humorously on their professional journeys.

New Year’s Eve Preparations

As the episode approached its conclusion, they toasted to the New Year, with Cohen opting for his branded “Fresquila” and Cooper taking a shot. This moment underscored the festive and convivial atmosphere of their long-standing friendship.

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Conclusion

Stephen Colbert wrapped up the episode by reinforcing the camaraderie and jovial spirit shared between himself, Anderson Cooper, and Andy Cohen. He extended holiday greetings and promoted upcoming content, ensuring the conversation left listeners with a sense of warmth and anticipation for future episodes.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Stephen Colbert [03:30]: “Pete Hegseth’s 12-step program. Step one. Admit that you are powerless over alcohol. Then chug. Chug. Chug.”
• Andy Cohen [03:54]: “Tequila.”
• Anderson Cooper [03:26]: “It just…”
• Andy Cohen [15:04]: “Champagne is my problem when it comes to hangovers.”
• Anderson Cooper [18:41]: “Andy, you need to serve this man plenty of alcohol on New Year's because of what he has been through this year.”
• Stephen Colbert [23:10]: “I have a house in this small town in northern Brazil.”
• Andy Cohen [26:26]: “I will accept a ride from a stranger.”
• Anderson Cooper [28:39]: “What might you say to Andy of 15 years ago, what does he need to know?”
• Stephen Colbert [29:45]: “A translucent American.”

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Takeaways

This episode of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert masterfully balanced humor with insightful discussions on current events and personal anecdotes. Through his interactions with Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen, Colbert not only entertained but also provided a window into the camaraderie and personal lives of two prominent media personalities. The inclusion of notable quotes and relatable stories made the episode both engaging and memorable, offering listeners a comprehensive and enjoyable experience.

Transcript

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[Stephen Colbert]

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[Stephen Colbert]

Welcome, welcome one and all to the Late Show. I'm your host, Stephen Colbert, ladies and gentlemen. What do we got? What do we got left? 20. We got 20 shopping days until Christmas. And if you're looking to get something for Donald Trump, you might think about our new secretary of defense because things are looking not good for current Sec Def nominee and guy in the movie with one line about to find out that Jason Bourne is very good at fighting. Pete Hegseth. Hegseth's nomination has been in trouble from the beginning. Trump only knew about Hegseth from seeing him on TV as one of the hosts of Fox and Friends weekend. You know their slogan, the only way grandpa knows it's Saturday. It has now come to light that Hegseth may have a slight work problem when he shows up at drinking because according to an NBC report, Pete Hegseth drinking worried colleagues at Fox News. Reached for comment, Judge Jeanine Pirro said August Assenfarp strong. It's a strong statement. Strong backing him up now, folks, in anonymous interviews with some of Hegseth's Fox colleagues, witnesses recounted more than a dozen occasions during Hegseth's time as co host of Fox and Friends weekends, where they smelled alcohol on him before he went on air. But come on, come on. It's a show that starts at 6am on the weekend. I'm sure a lot of morning hosts are still feeling it from the night before. I mean, for Pete's sake, the CBS Sunday Morning Logo does look hungover. What's that, Jane? What? Huh? In Hegseth's defense, none of the sources could recall an instance when Hegseth missed a scheduled appearance because he'd been drinking. And that's great, because you know what everyone says when the drunk guy shows up at work. Oh, good, you're here. The chainsaws are over there. The trees are that way. If you watch some of Pete's TV appearances over the last few years, you may have spotted some clues he had a problem.

[Andy Cohen]

Champagne is my problem when it comes to hangovers.

[Anderson Cooper]

It just.

[Stephen Colbert]

But it fixes the problem in the.

[Andy Cohen]

Morning because then you have a little.

[Stephen Colbert]

Bit more champagne, as she pointed out, and then your problem goes away. Yes, he's right. He doesn't have a drinking problem. He just keeps drinking and the problem goes away. It's Pete Hegseth's 12 step program. Step one. Admit that you are powerless over alcohol. Then chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug.

[Andy Cohen]

Tequila.

[Stephen Colbert]

Now. It works for him. It works for him. In case you didn't know, having a Secretary of Defense who cannot stay sober would might be bad because a Secretary of Defense is generally working at all hours and might need to respond to a crisis at any time, day or night. Now, to calm fears about this exact issue, Hegseth's team has released this ad.

[Andy Cohen]

It's 3:00am and your children are safe and asleep. Who do you want answering the phone?

[Stephen Colbert]

It's Pete, bitch. I'm drinking Bailey's out of my third wife's shoes.

[Andy Cohen]

Woohoo.

[Stephen Colbert]

Let's bomb France today. There you go. Sure, why not? Chuggin Bailey's today. Hegseth foreswore on the job drinking, saying, this is the biggest deployment of my life and there won't be a drop of alcohol on my lips while I'm doing it. A bold pledge that can mean only one thing. He's going to butt chug now. Boof. The return of the Boof. It's been a while now. We at the Late show are nothing if not fair and balanced. So I should let you know that since this NBC report, several Fox News presenters denied that they had ever detected alcohol on their former colleague when he was on the air. And while I'm sure this was as rigorously fact checked as all other Fox News reports, it's actually not the best news for Hegseth because it means he was sober when he did this. Who's going to win this battle of the lumberjack? Please act responsibly, apparently. Apparently?

[Andy Cohen]

Why?

[Stephen Colbert]

Not sure. Apparently the reports of the drinky drink are making Trump doing the thanky think because word is Trump's support for Hegseth is teetering much like Pete Hegseth at a staff meeting. I'll fight any intern for college credit. Instead. Trump is mulling replacing HEGSETH with Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. While DeSantis actually has some defense qualifications, the replacement isn't a done deal because some in Trump's orbit strongly dislike Desantis. Wow, that is a weird way to find out. I'm in Trump's orbit. I didn't know that. I didn't. I did not know that. I did not know. I don't. And other folks on the list of possible Hegseth replacements include Iowa Senator Joni Ernst and former Pentagon official Elbridge Colby, who from the name alone, I have to assume is a block of cheese from the 1800s. Yes, Elbridge Colby. Elbridge Colby. And if none of those people work out, Trump can always turn to the anchor of Fox's 3am panel show, stars in gripes with Ardsley blonde teeth. Trump is also getting a lot of visitors. For instance, last week Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg dined at the President Elect's Mar a Lago Club in Florida. The visit is a bit unexpected considering that in his coffee table book, Trump threatened to send Zuckerberg to prison for the rest of his life. That is the most threatening coffee table book since Anne Getty's released I have all your babies. It's a good book, though. It's really good. Really great present. Zuckerberg has clearly been trying to win Trump over for a while here. Last July, he called Trump a badass. Can't argue with that. I would never dare call this a good ass. Whether or not. Whether or not the Senate gets to do shots at Hag's death's confirmation hearing, they've got other work to do. Today they grilled officials from five airlines over fees for seats and checked bags. Of course, it's always hard to get answers from airline executives. Sir, is your company engaging in price gouging? Sir, does your company price gouge?

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[Stephen Colbert]

Speak to an agent. Representative, the Senate is acting. That was a scene. I was in a scene. I had a character spine. The Senate is investigating so called junk fees which are the extras you pay on top of the ticket price, like when they charge you for seats with additional leg room as well as those in preferred locations that are closer to the Front of the plane. I actually think the best seats are in the back of the plane because from there you get to watch 60 different versions of Deadpool and Wolverine, all starting at slightly different times. Between 2018 and 2023, junk fees alone allowed airlines to pocket billions of dollars. Okay, but the airlines need that money. How else are they going to pay for crucial things like abstract in flight safety videos, where for no reason at all, the plane is a Broadway theater or a yoga studio or a giant Rube Goldberg machine? Just remember, always make sure your pulley that drops the marble onto a row of dominoes is stored before takeoff and landing. This is all detailed in a multi year Senate study. And the chair of the committee says this report pulls back the curtain on tactics like dynamic pricing. Of course, the curtain is then quickly closed by the first class flight attendant. If you don't fly Delta 1, you don't get to see Delta 1. Now go poop in a bucket, you beasts. Ooh. There was some big political drama overseas yesterday when the President of South Korea declared surprise martial law. That's actually really impressive. You know how hard it is to throw a surprise martial law? You have to get the entire military to hide behind the couch and then be quiet at the same time. Turn off the tank. Turn off the tank. So to catch his critics off guard. No, stop. Stop it. Don't reward me. So to catch his critics off guard, President Yoon Suk Yeol issued a martial law decree at 11pm on a Tuesday night. You never make a good decision at 11pm on a Tuesday. You're either starting a third glass of Chardonnay in a new season of Bake off, or you're declaring martial law. But guess what? Joke's on Yoon. Because by South Korean law, Parliament can vote to overturn martial law. And just two hours after he issued his decree, lawmakers made their way past armed guards to enter the country's national assembly to vote against it. One of them even live streaming himself, climbing over a fence to get back in. Oh, no. If Trump ever declares martial law, we're screwed. Our Congress is way too old to climb fences. I mean, it's a nail biter every time they get into a bathtub. We'd have to make the Senate walk in. Now, bear in mind, bear in mind, bear in mind. Lawmakers were doing this as armed soldiers were breaking windows to get into Parliament and stop the assembly. That is very beeping bad Korean food pie. In the end. In the end. See? No, you see, you encourage me and you get jokes like that in the end, lawmakers voted against the decree 190 to 0. And by 4:30am Yoon withdrew martial law, meaning in total, his entire coup lasted six hours, making it the shortest attempted coup since. Well, you know, we got a great show for you tonight.

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[Stephen Colbert]

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[Andy Cohen]

This untouchable mob boss and then he turned into an artist.

[Stephen Colbert]

You sacrificed to better themselves, to better their family. Don't miss the French Montana story for Khadija. New documentary now streaming exclusively on paramount. Go to paramountplus.com to try it. Free terms apply. Welcome back, everybody. Ladies and gentlemen. You know, you know, my guest tonight is the anchor of Anderson Cooper360 on CNN and the host of Watch what happens live on Bravo. They've been friends for over 25 years and throw the best New Year's Eve party in cable news. Please welcome back to the Late show, Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen. That's very interesting. That's very interesting. What? Because the audience obviously is so excited to see both of you guys. And you guys enter in two very different ways.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes, yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

You enter two very different ways.

[Anderson Cooper]

Andy is like, hey, everybody, it's great, great.

[Stephen Colbert]

And I'm just like, let's get this over with. Exactly. Exactly.

[Andy Cohen]

That about sums it up.

[Stephen Colbert]

This is how a TV person enters. That's how a movie star enters. Yes.

[Andy Cohen]

Yet the movie star gets the second chair.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, you know what? They need room. Yes.

[Andy Cohen]

Yay.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay, listen, as I said, I was saying to Louis before it's Christmas, because you guys are here. It's always like, this is how we mark the seasons is when you guys, the special Santa's helpers, are here to mark New Year's Eve. Big news last year we talked about is you guys could drink again.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

And are you allowed to drink this year?

[Anderson Cooper]

Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

You are allowed to. All right, let's. Let's. Let's toast. You guys get toasted. By now we have different options here. This is that George liberal tequila here. That costs, amigos.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

This is the tequila that got Joe Biden to drop out. Actually, do you want to. Do you guys want to do. There's flies in here. Do you want to do tequila shots or do you want to do some Fresca and tequila?

[Andy Cohen]

Well, you know, Fresquila is my brand, so that's what I'm going to have.

[Stephen Colbert]

Fresquila and Anderson.

[Andy Cohen]

Wow, that's a heavy pour, man.

[Stephen Colbert]

What?

[Andy Cohen]

That's a heavy pour.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, I want this to be a good interview.

[Andy Cohen]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

There you go. I'll throw that. Just throw that right? There you go. What will it be? What's your poison?

[Anderson Cooper]

I'll just do a shot.

[Stephen Colbert]

You'll just do a shot. Cuz you're a hard drinking man, dude. You're a hard drinker.

[Andy Cohen]

Wait, are you going on the air tonight? That's it.

[Stephen Colbert]

That I'm going rum. I'm going rum and Fresca. Wow. There you go.

[Andy Cohen]

Yeah, see, Fresca pairs with everything.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, the gift that keeps on giving it is. There you go. All right, now, Anderson, I want to ask you, you have done a lot of coverage of hurricanes.

[Anderson Cooper]

Uh huh.

[Stephen Colbert]

Uh huh.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

And first of all, cheers.

[Andy Cohen]

Cheers.

[Stephen Colbert]

Cheers. Cheers.

[Andy Cohen]

Cheers to all of you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, you guys are good guests. All right, we'll keep this nearby. There we go. So, Anderson, you've covered a lot of hurricanes in your day. Yes. And matter of fact, you almost got, like, hit by a sign years ago. Yes, I remember that. Yeah. I've been doing this long enough. I remember making jokes about you then.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yes, yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

This year during hurricane Milton, you got whacked. You got whacked again, right? This year?

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah, I got hit by something.

[Stephen Colbert]

There you go.

[Anderson Cooper]

Which, I mean, I gotta say, I have never. Like, I thought I Had accomplished some things in my career. I thought I had gotten, you know, some things of note or memorable things. The next day, Andy called me up. He's like, have you googled yourself? I was like, of course I haven't. You would. I don't google myself. But he said, do it. So I did. And there were more articles written about me. Like, the headline was, anderson Cooper gets hit by debris. Hit in the head by debris. Hit by debris.

[Stephen Colbert]

Mm.

[Anderson Cooper]

Well, also, it was a piece of styrofoam. I just want to point out. And none of these hundreds of articles said it was styrofoam.

[Stephen Colbert]

I think people don't have faith in your bone density. You think you have the skull of a sparrow.

[Andy Cohen]

The real offshoot was that what I got is, Andy, you need to serve this man plenty of alcohol on New Year's because of what he has been through this year.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. This is what it says, watching Anderson Cooper earn his New Year's Eve party.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

This one says, cnn better let Anderson Cooper black out on for this. All right, so anyway, both of you guys, this is a jump ball. Thanksgiving was just around the last corner there. Andy, you took your kids to St. Louis?

[Andy Cohen]

I did.

[Stephen Colbert]

Did you travel with your children? I did.

[Anderson Cooper]

I took them to Brazil.

[Stephen Colbert]

How was the traveling with the kids for you guys? St. Louis, Brazil. Very similar.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

So similar. Very similar lifestyles. So how's traveling with the kids for you guys?

[Andy Cohen]

It was great. I mean, it was actually. I mean, it was fun because you're.

[Stephen Colbert]

In front of the curtain.

[Andy Cohen]

Yes, I am in front of the curtain. However, that doesn't. I mean, I was still changing diapers in a teeny little area.

[Anderson Cooper]

I was on a flight back from Brazil. This was the last time last year, because I go every year. I have a house in this small town in northern Brazil.

[Andy Cohen]

Relatable?

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah, very relatable. Yeah, very sensible. Makes real good sense.

[Stephen Colbert]

Exactly.

[Andy Cohen]

The Vanderbilt boy.

[Anderson Cooper]

Oh, man.

[Stephen Colbert]

Come on, Let it go, Andy. Let it go. Enough. I'm so sorry. We'll cut that out. We'll edit that out.

[Anderson Cooper]

No, but my son Sebastian, who at the time was like, one, was very sick, and he was the guy on the flight that everybody hates. I was the guy on the flight that everybody hates. I was the guy on the flight I used to make fun of before.

[Stephen Colbert]

I had kids who couldn't get their kid to be quiet.

[Anderson Cooper]

Could not get. I mean, it's a ten hour flight. This went on, like, into the eighth hour. He's like, screaming. I was trying everything. And at the worst Moment, like, where I was literally, I was rethinking my entire life of choices. The flight attendant came and said, do you think he'd like a fruit plate? And I was like, no, I don't.

[Andy Cohen]

Think he would like a fruit plate.

[Anderson Cooper]

A fruit plate?

[Stephen Colbert]

Like, what are you talking about?

[Anderson Cooper]

Like, I was ready to kill somebody.

[Stephen Colbert]

Babies love kiwi. I know.

[Anderson Cooper]

I was like, well, fruit plate. He doesn't eat solid food.

[Stephen Colbert]

Wow. Wow. How about you, Andy? Work out okay?

[Andy Cohen]

It worked out okay. I mean, my son knows that the way to get to me is to scream Andy Cohen as as loud as he can.

[Anderson Cooper]

It's very strange.

[Stephen Colbert]

What do you mean? Like, you're trying to go under the.

[Andy Cohen]

Radar, then we're in the plane. I'm just trying to be with my kids. Whatever. He's like, andy Cohen. Andy Cohen. I'm like, oh, my God.

[Anderson Cooper]

By the way, I think Andy has taught his son to do this. I gotta say.

[Stephen Colbert]

Exactly. Children. Children will listen.

[Andy Cohen]

Children will listen.

[Stephen Colbert]

Children.

[Andy Cohen]

Don't applaud.

[Anderson Cooper]

It's a little suspicious because he yells out, it's TV's Andy Cohen.

[Stephen Colbert]

Watch what happens live.

[Andy Cohen]

Right?

[Stephen Colbert]

Great.

[Andy Cohen]

New episode of Salt Lake City airing tonight.

[Anderson Cooper]

Are they.

[Stephen Colbert]

Are they. Are they. Do they mind that people recognize you in public? Are they good with you being like, hey, you're Anderson.

[Andy Cohen]

Go back. Ben is trying to figure it out still, and my son's just noticing it. He keeps saying to me, why are you so special? Why are you? And I said, well, everyone's special. Like, we're all special. He's like, no, but you must be very special people. Like you.

[Anderson Cooper]

I actually took Ben aside the other day and was like, he's not very special.

[Stephen Colbert]

Not everyone likes it.

[Andy Cohen]

Yeah, right. Let me tell you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Talk to some of the Real Housewives. Yes. Yes. We have to take a quick break. We'll be right back with more Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen, everybody. Hey, everybody, look at these lovely young men. Anderson Cooper and Annie Cohen. Have a seat, everybody. Thanks very much. It doesn't, you know, get any more iconic than New York City at Christmas time with the lighting of the tree and everything. But you're originally from here. But you're not originally from here. What was it like for you when you first came to New York? What was your first impression?

[Andy Cohen]

Oh, my God. My first day. I will never forget my first day in New York City. Every corner I turned, I was so excited. Every corner in New York City still looks like every movie you've ever seen. I mean, it really delivers in that way. But my first day Here. My first night here, I saw Andy Warhol on Madison Avenue, which for me was so I'm a huge Warhol fan. And it was. It just felt like, oh, wow, this is it.

[Stephen Colbert]

My first adult ish trip to New York. I was in college. I was a junior. I was down in the Village trying to figure out whether I could afford to eat anything. And Rick Okasich walked by. Wow.

[Andy Cohen]

Wow.

[Stephen Colbert]

From the cars with 84 kind of skinny Ramones kind of clothing on and just tall and gawky and just eaten up the sidewalk. And I just was like, I have to live here. That's Rick. OK. Sick. Yes. Yeah.

[Andy Cohen]

Anderson grew up at Studio 54.

[Stephen Colbert]

I was going to where Rick Okasich was sometimes there. That's Bianca Jagger. You know what's funny? That's Truman Capote.

[Andy Cohen]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Dancing with my mom. Right.

[Andy Cohen]

Not again. Truman. Pass the macaroni, Truman.

[Anderson Cooper]

You know what?

[Stephen Colbert]

It's funny. Do they serve macaroni in studio at his house? Oh, I. Sorry.

[Anderson Cooper]

Literally, as you guys were telling stories, I had a story about each of those people. And I was like, everything. If I open my mouth, Andy's just going to be like, very relatable. Very relatable. You make my job easy. I will tell you that. The first live performance I saw was Grace Jones at Studio 54 in 1979. And I was 11 years old and my mom took me there.

[Stephen Colbert]

Wow.

[Andy Cohen]

Appropriate.

[Stephen Colbert]

Pull over the bumper, baby. Yes, very. That's very appropriate. Okay. So again, very relatable.

[Anderson Cooper]

Who as a child did not go to Studio 54 to see Grace Jones.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. So this got a little attention. Andy, I think you posted Bravo. Andy posted. Of course he posted it. This is the two of you on the subway. Yeah.

[Andy Cohen]

That was a couple of weeks ago. Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

It seems like a perfect encapsulation of your friendship. You guys should do the Odd Couple.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Anderson Cooper]

What's funny about this is Andy did this and I'm looking somewhat suspicious, annoyed. And there were all these again. Andy was like, oh, you should Google, because there were all these articles saying I was upset to be riding on the subway. And I was like, what? I grew up in New York. I ride on the subway. What I was upset about was that I'm with Andy. We're on the subway, we're dressed, we're going out to see a friend's play. And it's the best way to get to Times Square at night. It avoids all the traffic. We were creating enough of a commotion on the subway car. Just standing there like idiots. And then Andy Whips out the camera because he's not getting enough attention to take a photograph.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, he had to.

[Anderson Cooper]

And create more content.

[Stephen Colbert]

He had to, because he always wants.

[Anderson Cooper]

To create friggin content.

[Stephen Colbert]

He had to do it because he didn't have a child there to go. Andy Cohen. Is Andy Cohen in the car? Yes. Yes.

[Andy Cohen]

You know what? Sue me for giving you something to talk about on a talk show.

[Stephen Colbert]

Hey, everybody, we're back with the host of New Year's Eve Live on cnn, Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper. It's not always subways for you, Andy. My understanding is this, is that you, you just take random rides from strangers.

[Andy Cohen]

I will accept a ride from a stranger.

[Stephen Colbert]

It's insane how, like, do you literally, like, stick out a thumb? What do you mean?

[Andy Cohen]

Well, no, there have been times that I've been looking around for a cab unsuccessfully, and people have pulled over and said, andy Cohen, where are you going? I'm like, to 23rd Street. And they say, hop in. I've gotten rides from nice truck drivers, from couples.

[Anderson Cooper]

He does. It's crazy.

[Stephen Colbert]

This is like the opening scene of a Law and Order. And they go, it just doesn't make sense. Why would Andy Cohen. Does he not have the lift app?

[Andy Cohen]

We just did a door closes.

[Anderson Cooper]

Dun dun.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. There's no handle on the inside.

[Andy Cohen]

We were, we were, we were just at. We just did a week of shows of Watch what happens live in Miami. And someone after the show handed me a joint. And the security guard that was there said, give me that joint. You can't smoke that joint. A stranger gave it to me and I said, you need to understand. My people, they want to get me high. They don't want to kill me. So I feel the same way. They want to give me a ride, not kill me.

[Stephen Colbert]

That is, that's, that's, that's the stupidest.

[Anderson Cooper]

Thing I've ever heard. That's the dumbest.

[Stephen Colbert]

That is the.

[Andy Cohen]

It makes perfect sense to me.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah, that's literally like when the article is written about your death, they'll be like, his last words were, this person didn't want to kill me. I mean, that's.

[Andy Cohen]

Wow. You, you, you, you are too negative about things.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah, well, okay, I've seen what happens. I mean, yeah, right. You live in a fantasy land of people just, you know, screaming at each other and you think it all works out at the end of the episode.

[Andy Cohen]

It does.

[Stephen Colbert]

He.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay, so 15 years of watch what happens live. Congratulations on that. Thank you very much. What would you say? What might you say? What might you say To Andy of 15 years ago, what does he need to know?

[Andy Cohen]

I would say, believe it or not, you're not gonna get canceled anytime soon.

[Stephen Colbert]

How long have we been doing 360?

[Anderson Cooper]

It's been like 20 years. Yeah, 20 years.

[Stephen Colbert]

Wow. Anything you want to say to Anderson Cooper of 20 years ago? What does he need to know?

[Anderson Cooper]

Yeah, I don't know. I wish I had thought about. I never thought my hair would actually go all white. I thought it would always stay kind of salt and pepper.

[Andy Cohen]

He has said to me, it's good. Do you think it's. Do you think I could get away with putting a little pepper in my hair? I'm like, you are all white.

[Stephen Colbert]

Everyone will do this. You know what I've called you for years? You're the Silver Surfer of cable news.

[Anderson Cooper]

Yes, actually, I believe you used to call me the White Walker of cable news.

[Andy Cohen]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Then the show went off the air. But I think what was good about it is that your hair went white so early that basically you locked in your look young. So no matter how old you get, you'll go like, hey, look the same.

[Anderson Cooper]

I went to the eyeglass store today because I needed glasses and I took out my glasses and I disappeared. Nobody can see me unless I have dark glass. It, like, anchors me without it. Yes, Just like.

[Stephen Colbert]

You're actually not a white man. You're translucent. Exactly. Yes. A translucent American.

[Anderson Cooper]

You absorb light. It's very strange.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, gentlemen, cheers. Happy New Year to both of you ahead of time and happy holidays. There you go. New Year's Eve live with Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen is on CNN December 31st. Go figure. Thank you for listening to the Late Show POD show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing. If you want to see more of me, come to The Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.

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[Stephen Colbert]

What if I told you imaginary friends are real?

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[Andy Cohen]

Rise of the Beasts, Let Them Come.

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[Stephen Colbert]

What if I told you imaginary friends are real?

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