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Unknown Speaker
Where'd you get those shoes?
Stephen Colbert
Easy.
Unknown Speaker
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Stephen Colbert
Welcome one and all to the Late Show. I'm your host, Stephen Colbert. Ladies and gentlemen, my friends and neighbors. Over the last two months, all the worrywarts out there have been running around going, oh, the Trump administration's evil. I don't think that's fair. They're all so dumb. Yesterday was this just yesterday? Just yesterday we found out just how dumb turns out. In an unprecedented security breach in a high highly classified cabinet level group chat about plans to bomb Yemen, Trump officials did not notice that they included the editor in chief of the Atlantic, Jeffrey Goldberg. That must have been really weird for Jeffrey. Looks like the group chat is blowing up Yemen. This is a gargantuanly stupid screw up. We have officially entered the Amelia Bedelia stage of government. Quit peak head Seth, scramble the fighter jets. No, not with a whisk. It all started when the journalist Goldberg received a request on the messaging app signal from a user identified as Michael Waltz, the name of Trump's national security advisor. Now, at first, Goldberg was concerned that it might be a hoax. But he got a hint it might be real when he was added to a text chain called Houthi PC Small Group. Turns out it was real and that Houthis is short for Houthis Idiots running our government. Come on. In addition, Hooties be named for that. In addition to Goldberg, the chat included National Security Adviser Michael waltz, Vice President J.D. vance, Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard, CIA Director John Ratcliffe, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, White House advisor Stephen Miller, Treasury Secretary Scott Besant, and also in the signal chat, Timothee Chalamet. Because these days, these. These days, he's in everything. According to Goldberg, the texts sounded as if they were written by the people who purportedly sent them. Yeah, only the real Pete Hegseth would text. You guys, Wama, get Patric, it's 5 o'clock sometimes on Friday, the group chat started to heat up like they always do on Fridays. You know, what do you guys want to do this weekend? Hit, Hit the curb. Korean barbeque, Rain. Laser guided hell on a desert outpost. Jaeger Bombs. Actual bombs. First, the JD Vance account texted, I think we are making a mistake. Coincidentally, also the original name of the group chat, Vance continued. Vance continues, there is a real risk that the public doesn't understand this and there is a strong argument for delaying this. A month doing the messaging work on why this matters. To which Pete Hegseth responded. I think messaging is going to be tough no matter what. Really? Because if anything, this story proves that messaging is actually too easy for you guys. In the end. In the end, the chat rangers put aside their differences and came together to agree to bomb the Houthis. Which Goldberg learned the next day when at 11:44am Pete Hegseth posted a team update which contained operational details of forthcoming strikes on Yemen, including information about targets, weapons the US Would be deploying, and attack sequencing. So to recap, the Secretary of Defense posted on a publicly available app specific war plans which were then seen by a reporter who was accidentally on the thread. It's a phenomenon previously known as brother of the bride on the bachelor party text chain. Ha ha Ron here. Coke and strippers do sound rad. But you know what would really be sick? Respecting my sister Disco emoji. Now, fun fact. Posting war plans on Signal may have violated several provisions of the Espionage Act. And the Signal app is not approved by the government for the sharing of classified information. And the only reason we know that they were doing any of this is because they accidentally included a journalist. What else are these merit based hires posting? Where else? What are they doing? Where else? Come on. For all we know, for just $4.99 a month, you might see the launch codes on OnlyFans. Then. Then, to confirm whether these bombing texts were real, Goldberg checked social media for news of strikes on Yemen while waiting in his car in a supermarket parking lot. Okay, that's bad for our country, but even worse for the guy trying to figure out if Goldberg was ever going to leave his parking spot. Hey, buddy, buddy. You don't see my turn signal here? What are you waiting for? Secret war plans? Screw it. Screw it. I'm going to stalk that old lady with a shopping cart. Hold on. Hold on. After Goldberg. Hi. After Goldberg started seeing reports of the strikes on social media, National Security Advisor Mike Waltz updated the chat group and described the operation as an amazing job, and then sent three emojis, a fist, American flag, and fire, to which Steve Witkoff responded with five emojis, two hands praying, a flexed bicep, and two American flags, to which I say, have those sent to the National Archives. And again, all of these. All of these. These are the people with the highest possible security clearance in the world who hold our most dangerous secrets, who aren't even supposed to say these things out loud outside of a skiff. And according to Goldberg, no one in the group seemed to have noticed my presence. And they should have known someone from the Atlantic was there, because after 10 messages, Goldberg chimed in to say, you've reached your free article limit. Please log in to. All of these people should be fired. Maybe some of them should go to jail. Who knows? I don't know. I'm not a judge. But one person close to the administration told Politico, everyone in the White House can agree on one thing. Mike Waltz is a idiot. Ladies and gentlemen. Please, please, please. No one takes this out of context. I agree with everyone in the White House. Hey, guys, add me to the chat. You won't even know I'm there. Now, with the full depth, with the complexity and depth of their incompetence on display, these folks have tried every kind of spin they can think of. Hegseth talked to reporters fresh off a plane in Hawaii, and he went on the offensive against Jeffrey Goldberg. You're talking about a deceitful and highly discredited so called journalist. This is the guy that pedals in garbage. This is what he does. Then why was he on the war planning group chat? Why was he in the chat? This guy's an idiot and everyone hates him. You're the guys who put him in the chat. You did. He's a moron. Okay, then don't put him in the secret chat. If he's a bad guy, why is he in the chat? Hi. A reporter also asked Hegseth how they could have both used a publicly available app and accidentally shared all this classified info with a journalist.
Unknown Speaker
Why were those details shared on signal? And how did you learn that a journalist was privy to the targets, the types of weapons used.
Stephen Colbert
I've heard I was characterized. Nobody was texting war plans. And that's all I have to say about that. Thank you.
Jenna Ortega
Appreciate it. The NSC said it was authentic.
Stephen Colbert
Nobody believes a word you're saying. And that's all I have to say about that. Okay? When Donald Trump was asked about the epic historic national security cluster munch, he tried to dodge it completely. I don't know anything about it. I know nothing about it. You're saying that they had what? I don't know anything about it. You're telling me about it for the first time. Trump might plead ignorance and that's believable, but his team just go right there. Go right there. But his team definitely knew better, especially hegseth. Just one week ago a Pentagon wide email went out warning about the vulnerability of using signal. Well, there's your problem. They should have put it in the group chat. Nobody checks their work email. Mine's all come to the softball game. And here's who Paramount's bombing this weekend. We got a great show for you tonight coming up. Jenna Ortega Foreign.
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Stephen Colbert
Welcome back. Thank you Ladies and gentlemen, folks, my first guest tonight is an actor, you know, from Wednesday, Scream 6 and Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Please welcome to the Late Show, Jenna Ortega. Hey, so nice to meet you.
Jenna Ortega
So nice to meet you as well. I can't believe we've gone this long.
Stephen Colbert
I can't believe it either without doing this. That is a beautiful dress you're wearing. Thanks for having me. What is that made of?
Jenna Ortega
It's made of glass. And I'm not gonna lie, sometimes there's like pieces of it that are poking my ass every time I sit.
Stephen Colbert
Let's have some medics standing by, please. Ortega.
Jenna Ortega
I feel uncomfortable, but extremely comfortable at the same time.
Stephen Colbert
Oh, excellent, excellent. Well, you wear uncomfortability. Well, first of all, congratulations on the whirlwind that you've been through over the last several years.
Jenna Ortega
Thank you.
Stephen Colbert
Wednesday, Scream six. Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. People dressing up like you for Halloween and doing your dance before you were 20 years old. You know, here's the thing that can be a lot, you know, to be shot out of a cannon like that, it's very scary.
Jenna Ortega
I remember I had always. I've been acting since I was 9, so I've been doing this for a while. So I've had glimpses of that kind of attention in public before. But I remember when the show came out, it was during Thanksgiving, so I was at home with my family, no makeup sweats, felt gross and awesome at the same time. And then I was walking my nephew outside, like in my parents neighborhood with my dog. And I just remember this woman and her daughter recognizing me in the neighborhood, doing a full screeching, stop. Spinning around, doing a U turn and then trying to get my attention. But I was scared because I was with my nephew. So she was like yelling at him to get over here. But then I think he was getting kind of freaked out and I didn't know what to do. But that was the first time I had left my house since the show came out. And I think that's when I realized, oh, it's like something outrageous is written on my forehead and maybe things aren't going to be the same.
Stephen Colbert
Yes, it gets different. So what about now? A couple years in, you know, now you heard the audience's reaction to Jenna Ortega. Have you begun to enjoy it?
Jenna Ortega
Um, no, but it's like you get accustomed to it, you get used to it. You know, you don't think about it so much anymore. And I think I've just now kind of figuring out the balance when it first happened. It was overwhelming, and I didn't like it at all. And I was having this, like, visceral reaction to it. But I think now, you know, I understand. It comes with the territory. I've seen this level for quite some time now, and I think it's just, you gotta stop caring. It doesn't matter.
Stephen Colbert
Right. Well, I hope you can find an opportunity to enjoy it, because what it really means is that work you started when you were nine was good work that added up to something that people agree is beautiful and enjoyable and that you're an artist and a crowd.
Jenna Ortega
That is so sweet.
Stephen Colbert
And that's what it means.
Jenna Ortega
That is so sweet. Thank you. Thank you very much.
Stephen Colbert
It's yours. It's not this thing. It's yours. So, please. In December, you finished filming season two of Wednesday, which people are excited about. I can't believe it's been this long.
Jenna Ortega
I know.
Stephen Colbert
Between seasons. Here we are. Here. There we go. There's the character that we love. People are very excited for one of the guest stars you have this season. Tell the people who we got.
Jenna Ortega
So we've got Lady Gaga joining our show, which we are so, so unbelievably excited. You've met her. You know her.
Stephen Colbert
Oh, Stephanie. I'm sorry. I call her Stephanie. I don't know what you call it.
Jenna Ortega
It's crazy. Well, when we were on set, it was. I actually didn't know what to call it. So everyone was just going, gaga's coming. Gaga's coming. And that was the code word. And it was so funny because she is so sweet, so humble, just a normal person. And it's beautiful and amazing and it's intimidating when someone is so talented but so cool at the same time. But I remember showing up to set and they completely changed everything.
Stephen Colbert
Like, wait, different than before? She worked there?
Jenna Ortega
Yes. We had a normal, functioning set. And I remember pulling up to work the day of, and suddenly there was, like, truck after truck after truck. I was walking and I tripped on this walkway and I didn't understand what the walkway was. And they had, like, rolled out this walkway for her to exit from the trailer to the tents. I went to my tent to hang out, and they replaced my dirty tent with, like, brand new tents. I had a barber's chair. They gave me fancy water, everything. We, like, really did it up for her, guys. We really wanted to impress her.
Stephen Colbert
Wow.
Jenna Ortega
And then the next day, I went back to my dusty setup.
Stephen Colbert
All right, gag is gone. Bring in the garbage.
Jenna Ortega
Yeah. I wanted her to be on set even more, but Part of it was because the water was really nice.
Stephen Colbert
Season one was in Romania. You shot it? Yes, it was. Ok. So this. Where'd you shoot this season?
Jenna Ortega
Dublin, Ireland.
Stephen Colbert
Oh, really?
Jenna Ortega
Very different.
Stephen Colbert
How long were you there?
Jenna Ortega
I was there for seven months, eight months.
Stephen Colbert
That's a great town.
Jenna Ortega
Yeah. Wait, have you been.
Stephen Colbert
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Jenna Ortega
Okay.
Stephen Colbert
Oh, yeah. So you get it. I'm actually going over pretty soon again.
Jenna Ortega
Are you so excited?
Stephen Colbert
I'm so excited.
Jenna Ortega
Yes.
Stephen Colbert
Yeah.
Jenna Ortega
I love it there. I feel like if the weather wasn't so, they would probably get a ton of.
Stephen Colbert
Where's my swear jar? There you go. I gave up swearing for Lent. You don't have to. Ok. Yeah. The weather is a little rough. A little rough there. That's why you wear a thirsty sweater.
Jenna Ortega
A thirsty sweater?
Stephen Colbert
A big old chunky sweater.
Jenna Ortega
Right.
Stephen Colbert
Do you like the Irish accent?
Jenna Ortega
I actually love the Irish accent.
Stephen Colbert
I do too. Yeah.
Jenna Ortega
I don't understand. I think people are just being jerks when they say they can't understand what they're saying.
Stephen Colbert
I don't even care if I can hear what they're saying. It sounds like singing to me when they just talk.
Jenna Ortega
Well, even their music, it was so weird. I remember when I went there, I didn't even like Guinness or anything like that. I hate beer. And by the end I was like singing in a pub at two in the morning with like a group of people I'd never met before.
Stephen Colbert
Well, Guinness is better than beer. It's a loaf of bread in a cup.
Jenna Ortega
Yes. Oh my God. That's what my friend says. She says it's a sandwich in a glass.
Stephen Colbert
Yeah. We have to take a quick break. We'll be right back with more. Jenna Ortega.
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Stephen Colbert
Today at T Mobile, I'm joined by a special co anchor. What up everybody? It's your boy, big snoop deal.
Jenna Ortega
Double G Snoop.
Stephen Colbert
Where can people go to find great deals?
Jenna Ortega
Head to T mobile.com and get four.
Stephen Colbert
Iphone 16s with Apple Intelligence on us.
Jenna Ortega
Plus four lines for 25 bucks.
Stephen Colbert
That's quite a deal. Snoop. And when you switch to T mobile you can save versus the other big guys. Compared comparable plans plus streaming. Respect. When we up out of here, see.
Unknown Speaker
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Stephen Colbert
What's your favorite place that you've shot? Because you got an opportunity to shoot a lot of different places.
Jenna Ortega
New Zealand is probably my favorite because I always shoot there during the summer. And it's extraordinary. It's in a jungle.
Stephen Colbert
Yeah. Every geological feature on Earth is available on those two islands. You know, got the tropics to the Alps down there. Yeah.
Jenna Ortega
The entire west coast is black sand beaches. I love how much they appreciate the Maori culture. And it's just again, like, if they weren't so far away, people would probably visit them more too.
Stephen Colbert
Did you. They're famous for being adventurous. Did you any. Did you bungee jump?
Jenna Ortega
No.
Stephen Colbert
That's where modern bungee jumping was invented was in New Zealand.
Jenna Ortega
Great.
Stephen Colbert
You can jump off a bridge. Yeah. Yeah.
Jenna Ortega
Have you been?
Stephen Colbert
I have, yeah.
Jenna Ortega
Did you bungee jump?
Stephen Colbert
I did.
Jenna Ortega
Why?
Stephen Colbert
There was a camera pointed at me and I thought it would be funny. Oh, so you're more funny than terrifying?
Jenna Ortega
So you'll just do anything then?
Stephen Colbert
If there's a camera pointed at me, you know, you gotta get the shot.
Jenna Ortega
You're in the right business.
Stephen Colbert
Exactly, exactly. They don't give these desks to stable people. So is that where you were you shooting with Taika Waititi? Is that where you're dealing with?
Jenna Ortega
Yeah, I was shooting with Taika.
Stephen Colbert
Okay. So that's the new name of the movie again.
Jenna Ortega
It's called Clara and the Sun. It's based off of an Ishiguro book. He's the same author of Remains of the Day.
Stephen Colbert
And you, you play Clara?
Jenna Ortega
Yes, I do. I play a robot.
Stephen Colbert
A robot?
Jenna Ortega
I play an artificial friend.
Stephen Colbert
Okay. How did you like playing a robot?
Jenna Ortega
It was terrifying. I've never played a happy person before.
Stephen Colbert
And you still haven't, because it's not a person, it's a robot.
Jenna Ortega
So true. You're so right. No, it was really terrifying. I've never done anything. Taika has a very specific sense of humor. And either you get it and you agree with it or you don't, and that's fine. But I remember just showing up and we didn't know how to make somebody who had never experienced the world before see it in a new lens. And a lot of the lines, if you read them on the page, it makes it sound as though Clara is really dumb. She doesn't know what a lemon is. You know, she walks into walls, things like that. So we were trying to find a natural approach to make it work. And I just had a baby niece. She was just born. Her name is Maya and she was beautiful. And I was spending time with her visiting home before I went to do this job. And I was looking at her and she has this like awful blank stare that all babies have where they're just so clueless about everything that I was watching her and I thought, oh, that's what I'm gonna do. So if you watch that movie and you watch my performance, it is based off of my toddler nephews and my newborn baby niece. So good.
Stephen Colbert
You now star in a new movie, Death of a Unicorn. I love the ads. Everywhere. You and Paul Rudd getting gored by a unicorn. They're everywhere, yes. What's it about?
Jenna Ortega
Well, the title's pretty self explanatory. Within the first 10 minutes, me and my father in the film, Paul Rudd, hit a unicorn with our car.
Stephen Colbert
Like a unicorn Unicorn. Like a mythical creature. Unicorn, yeah.
Jenna Ortega
There's. Yes, a mythical unicorn creature. And we don't know what to do with it, so we shove it in the back of our car. And then the rest of the film is he works for this pharmaceutical company and they find out and they want to take advantage. And it's just kind of this eat the rich, satirical dark comedy thing. And I think it surprisingly has a lot of heart and things like that, but it was an incredible experience. And we shot with real unicorns.
Stephen Colbert
Wow. Those are pretty rare these days.
Jenna Ortega
I know. Paul Rudd, Richard E. Grant, Tea Leone.
Stephen Colbert
Unicorns.
Jenna Ortega
Poulter. Yeah, they're all real.
Stephen Colbert
We have a clip here. Do we need to know anything before we go looking for this?
Jenna Ortega
No, I would say just do it.
Stephen Colbert
Just do it, Jim.
Jenna Ortega
Just go.
Stephen Colbert
I know a lot of species in this area are rare, but is this exact, you know, familiar to you? Familiar to us? No, this is new. This doesn't seem novel to you? Yes, it is novel, now that you mention it. What exactly are we saying this is, though?
Jenna Ortega
I think we know exactly what it is.
Stephen Colbert
What I can say with total confidence is Elliot here has hit a horse like Mammalia vertebralia. Would that be the correct classification? No, but it is horse shaped with some sort of protrusion or growth. Right. That's my working theory, too. Feral horse mad, tumor ridden, jumps in the middle of the road. Not the fault of any one driver, per se.
Jenna Ortega
It's a unicorn.
Stephen Colbert
It does seem like a Unicorn. Thank you, Jenna. It's so lovely to meet you. Such a pleasure.
Jenna Ortega
Thank you so much.
Stephen Colbert
Death of a Unicorn is in theaters March 28th. Jenna Ortega, everybody. Thank you for listening to the Late Show Pod show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing. If you want to see more of me, come to The Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.
Summary of "Jenna Ortega | Textposé" Episode of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert
Release Date: March 26, 2025
In this riveting episode of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert, host Stephen Colbert delves into current political mishaps before welcoming acclaimed actress Jenna Ortega as his guest. The episode seamlessly blends sharp political satire with an engaging celebrity interview, offering listeners both humor and insightful conversation.
Colbert opens the episode with a scathing critique of a recent security lapse within the Trump administration. He humorously dissects the blunder where top Trump officials inadvertently included journalist Jeffrey Goldberg, editor-in-chief of The Atlantic, in a highly classified group chat discussing plans to bomb Yemen.
Notable Quotes:
"It all started when the journalist Goldberg received a request on the messaging app Signal from a user identified as Michael Waltz, the name of Trump's national security advisor." [00:02]
"Houthi PC Small Group. Turns out it was real and that Houthis is short for Houthis Idiots running our government." [04:15]
Colbert emphasizes the absurdity of high-level officials discussing sensitive military operations on an unsecured platform, mocking the lack of oversight and professionalism:
He further satirizes the situation by imagining the officials’ obliviousness to Goldberg's presence and the potential breaches of the Espionage Act:
Colbert wraps up his monologue by highlighting the farcical nature of the incident and its implications for national security.
After delivering a comprehensive and humorous analysis of the security breach, Colbert transitions to the main segment of the show, shifting focus to welcome his guest.
a. Welcoming Jenna Ortega
Stephen Colbert warmly welcomes Jenna Ortega, an actress renowned for her roles in Wednesday, Scream 6, and the upcoming Beetlejuice sequel. Their exchange sets a friendly and relaxed tone for the interview.
"That is a beautiful dress you're wearing." [14:12]
"It's made of glass. And I'm not gonna lie, sometimes there's like pieces of it that are poking my ass every time I sit." [14:18]
b. Navigating Fame and Public Attention
Ortega shares her experiences dealing with sudden fame, particularly following the success of Wednesday. She recounts her initial discomfort with public recognition and how she has grown to manage it over time.
"I've been acting since I was 9, so I've been doing this for a while. So I've had glimpses of that kind of attention in public before." [15:07]
"I think now, you know, I understand. It comes with the territory. I've seen this level for quite some time now, and I think it's just, you gotta stop caring." [16:04]
Colbert commends her resilience and the positive impact of her long-term dedication to her craft:
c. Behind the Scenes of 'Wednesday' Season Two
Delving into her latest project, Ortega discusses the filming of Wednesday Season Two, expressing excitement about returning to the set and sharing anecdotes from production.
"We had a normal, functioning set. And I remember pulling up to work the day of, and suddenly there was, like, truck after truck after truck." [17:50]
"We really wanted to impress her." [18:24]
d. Collaborations and Upcoming Projects
Ortega highlights her collaboration with music icon Lady Gaga, describing Gaga's down-to-earth personality despite her fame, and shares insights into her upcoming films, including Clara and the Sun and Death of a Unicorn.
"We really wanted to impress her. And then the next day, I went back to my dusty setup." [17:50]
"I play Clara, an artificial friend." [22:38]
"Death of a Unicorn is in theaters March 28th." [25:16]
She provides a humorous glimpse into filming Death of a Unicorn, detailing the fantastical elements of the movie and its satirical take on corporate greed:
e. Personal Reflections and Future Aspirations
Ortega reflects on her personal growth and the challenges of portraying complex characters, particularly her role as a robot in Clara and the Sun. She draws parallels between her family experiences and her acting approach.
"I've never played a happy person before." [22:45]
"If you watch that movie and you watch my performance, it is based off of my toddler nephews and my newborn baby niece." [22:53]
Stephen Colbert concludes the interview by promoting Ortega's latest film, Death of a Unicorn, and encourages listeners to explore more content on The Late Show YouTube channel for additional clips and exclusives.
The episode wraps up with warm thanks to Jenna Ortega, leaving listeners with a blend of entertainment and anticipation for her upcoming projects.
Overall, this episode masterfully balances political satire with heartfelt celebrity interaction, providing listeners with both laughs and meaningful conversation. Stephen Colbert's engaging hosting style, combined with Jenna Ortega's candid insights, makes for a compelling and enjoyable podcast experience.