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Stephen Colbert
It's the Late Show Poncho with Stephen Colbert, folks. If you watch the show, you know I spend most of my time over there in the news kitchen simmering the finest, most topical news beef and pork with bay leaf, onion, garlic, spices and a touch of cayenne before cooling it and placing it into a handmade pie crust and baking it at 475. 400. To present to you the hearty yet subtle French Canadian Tortillaire meat pie that is my monologue. But sometimes, just sometimes, folks, I steal a Vienna sausage from a raccoon and stuff it into a discarded pita and leave it on the engine block of an idling truck before snacking on the filthy hot pocket of news that is my segment.
IXL Advertiser
Meanwhile.
Stephen Colbert
100%. That's the only snow tire I need. Emotional snow tire. Meanwhile, in adorable rodent news, a baby raccoon was rescued after getting soaked in a Massachusetts storm and was found standing on two legs. Honestly, I had no idea they could stand on two legs. Until now. I thought the only thing I had in common with raccoons was my love of garbage. Meanwhile, fashion alert. Millennials are embracing compression socks and trying to make them cool. Nope, you're just getting older, millennials. You're hitting your 40s, so you're trying to make every part of aging a fashion trend. I call it nursing home chic. As you can see, my compression socks match my CPAP machine, but I wouldn't be caught dead in last year's catheter. Meanwhile, the dill pickle is having a moment. Which is why dill pickle is cup noodles briniest flavor yet. Because when I think cup noodles, I think not salty enough. Apparently, pickle forward foods are having a serious moment as these ingredients provide just enough weirdness to feel exciting. Did not know that, but apparently these days, people love weird food. That's why the hottest new cereal to hit shelves is Honey Bunches of pervs. Okay, now pour the milk on me. I'm not mak. Hey, this is the news. Meanwhile, out on Long Island, Lorenzo the giant lobster got a second chance at life. Finally kicked cocaine, and Brenda took him back. And I'm being told that's not what it was. Local news covered the big day on Thursday.
News Segment Host
Peter's Clam Bar in Hempstead, Long island, decided to celebrate National Lobster Day and Father's Day with a splash by setting Lorenzo a 21 pound, 110-year-old lobster free.
Stephen Colbert
Lorenzo just kind of, like, slipped through the cracks, and he just. He ended up in our tank for years. Some of these lobsters just don't live that long. And this one did. Some of the lobsters in your tank don't live that long. They just don't live that long. We don't know why. Is that what you told Lorenzo all these years? Yeah. Sometimes my friends leave the tank and never return. They're probably in a big tank upstate. Anyone else smell drawn butter? Before being released, the restaurant had a little celebration where they issued Lorenzo a pardon. A pardon for what? Being delicious? Or are all the lobsters we eat criminals? Tonight we have a three pound lobster who's doing hard time for manslaughter. This lobster killed a guy when he was drunk is what I'm trying to say. Meanwhile, in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, an osprey dropped a hammerhead shark on a man trying to play disc golf, which is five points. I don't know how disc golf works. Meanwhile, there's a new summer vacation trend among parents foregoing high intensity camps and activities for their children in favor of weeks of unplanned time. A trend they're calling kid rotting. Hey, maybe don't call it that. Not everything's a trend. Not everything has to have a name. Being bored on summer vacation isn't something you invented. It's just being a kid. That's like saying, my family and I are doing this new thing where we all lay in bed and close our eyes from 11pm to 6am we call it microdeathing. Yeah. Yeah. Meanwhile, cooking steak in the dishwasher is going viral. Here's a clip of the chef teaching the dishwasher method.
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Teaching my culinary class how to make a dishwasher steak.
Stephen Colbert
Okay, that is wrong. Steak goes on the bottom rack. Thank you for listening to the Late Show POD show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more. See more of me. Come to The Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.
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Podcast Summary: The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert
Episode: Meanwhile | Gen Z Loves Pickles
Release Date: June 22, 2025
The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert, hosted by CBS, delivers the signature blend of sharp wit, insightful commentary, and humorous takes on the latest news and trends. In the episode titled "Meanwhile | Gen Z Loves Pickles," Stephen Colbert navigates through a variety of quirky stories, pop culture observations, and satirical commentary that resonate with both long-time fans and new listeners alike.
Timestamp: [02:03]
Stephen kicks off the episode with his characteristic humor, comparing his monologue-writing process to crafting a hearty French Canadian Tortillaire meat pie. He humorously describes the meticulous ingredients and processes involved:
"I spend most of my time over there in the news kitchen simmering the finest, most topical news beef and pork with bay leaf, onion, garlic, spices and a touch of cayenne before cooling it and placing it into a handmade pie crust and baking it at 475 degrees to present to you the hearty yet subtle French Canadian Tortillaire meat pie that is my monologue." ([02:03])
Timestamp: [02:54]
Transitioning from culinary humor, Stephen shares a heartwarming news story about a baby raccoon rescued in Massachusetts. He expresses surprise at the raccoon's ability to stand on two legs, drawing a funny parallel between himself and the raccoon:
"Honestly, I had no idea they could stand on two legs. Until now. I thought the only thing I had in common with raccoons was my love of garbage." ([02:54])
Timestamp: [03:20]
Shifting gears to fashion trends, Stephen humorously critiques millennials' adoption of compression socks, dubbing it "nursing home chic." He pokes fun at the inevitability of aging trends:
"You're hitting your 40s, so you're trying to make every part of aging a fashion trend. I call it nursing home chic." ([03:20])
Timestamp: [03:45]
Highlighting the unconventional food trends among Gen Z, Stephen discusses the popularity of dill pickles, particularly their incorporation into cup noodles. He satirizes the trendiness of "weird" foods:
"The dill pickle is having a moment. Which is why dill pickle is cup noodles' briniest flavor yet." ([03:45])
He continues with a mock announcement about a new cereal flavor:
"That's why the hottest new cereal to hit shelves is Honey Bunches of Pervs. Okay, now pour the milk on me." ([04:00])
Timestamp: [04:57]
Stephen delves into a local news story about Lorenzo, a 110-year-old lobster who was set free after being kept in captivity. He humorously anthropomorphizes Lorenzo's experience:
"Lorenzo just kind of, like, slipped through the cracks, and he just. He ended up in our tank for years. Some of these lobsters just don't live that long." ([04:57])
He further jokes about the concept of pardoning lobsters:
"Before being released, the restaurant had a little celebration where they issued Lorenzo a pardon. A pardon for what? Being delicious?" ([05:07])
Timestamp: [05:30]
In a bizarre turn of events, Stephen recounts the story of an osprey dropping a hammerhead shark on a man playing disc golf in Myrtle Beach. He humorously admits his lack of understanding of disc golf:
"An osprey dropped a hammerhead shark on a man trying to play disc golf, which is five points. I don't know how disc golf works." ([05:30])
Timestamp: [06:10]
Addressing parenting trends, Stephen critiques the movement where parents opt for unstructured time for their children, labeling it "kid rotting." He defends the natural state of childhood boredom:
"Not everything has to have a name. Being bored on summer vacation isn't something you invented. It's just being a kid." ([06:10])
Timestamp: [06:30]
Concluding his monologue, Stephen touches on the viral trend of cooking steak using a dishwasher. He humorously corrects a novice chef's technique:
"Okay, that is wrong. Steak goes on the bottom rack." ([07:18])
Timestamp: [07:23]
Wrapping up, Stephen invites listeners to engage further with the show through YouTube clips and exclusives, maintaining his signature playful tone.
Conclusion
In "Meanwhile | Gen Z Loves Pickles," Stephen Colbert masterfully blends humor with commentary, shedding light on peculiar news stories and contemporary trends. From the endearing rescue of a baby raccoon to the quirky rise of dill pickles in Gen Z's culinary preferences, Stephen offers a humorous lens through which listeners can view the absurdities of modern life. His ability to infuse personal anecdotes and witty remarks makes the episode both entertaining and relatable, ensuring that both dedicated fans and newcomers find value in tuning in.
Notable Quotes:
Stephen Colbert on Monologue Creation:
"I spend most of my time over there in the news kitchen simmering the finest, most topical news beef and pork..." ([02:03])
On Raccoons and Garbage:
"I thought the only thing I had in common with raccoons was my love of garbage." ([02:54])
Regarding Millennials' Fashion Choices:
"I call it nursing home chic." ([03:20])
On the Popularity of Pickles in Food Trends:
"Apparently, pickle forward foods are having a serious moment as these ingredients provide just enough weirdness to feel exciting." ([03:45])
On Lorenzo the Lobster's Release:
"A pardon for what? Being delicious?" ([05:07])
Understanding Disc Golf:
"I don't know how disc golf works." ([05:30])
Defending Childhood Boredom:
"It's just being a kid." ([06:10])
Correcting Dishwasher Steak Method:
"Okay, that is wrong. Steak goes on the bottom rack." ([07:18])
For more hilarious monologues and behind-the-scenes content, visit The Late Show YouTube channel and stay tuned for future episodes of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert.