Nathan Lane | Dow In The Dumps

Summary

Summary of "Nathan Lane | Dow In The Dumps" Episode of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert

Release Date: March 12, 2025
Podcast: The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert
Guest: Nathan Lane
Episode Title: Dow In The Dumps

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Introduction and Economic Commentary

Stephen Colbert opens the episode by addressing the current economic turmoil, highlighting the significant decline in the Dow Jones Industrial Average. He humorously attempts to reassure listeners amidst the chaos but quickly pivots to the grim reality:

"Yesterday, the Dow slipped on Trump's tariffs and fell down an elevator shaft. And today, it kept bonking its head on the way down, plunging more than 400 points in the last three weeks. In total, the stock market has lost $4 trillion in value, and experts now say the risk of a recession is 40%."
(00:52)

Colbert criticizes the administration's handling of the economy, particularly targeting former President Donald Trump's tariff policies and their impact on trade with Canada.

Tesla and Elon Musk's Downfall

A significant portion of the episode delves into the struggles of Elon Musk and his company, Tesla. Colbert satirizes Musk's financial losses and public image:

"Yesterday alone, Musk lost more than $16 billion. Come on. Wow."
(06:36)

He mocks Musk's attempts to deflect blame, referencing Musk's use of a Monty Python quote:

"always look on the bright side of life... I fart in your gender direction. Your mother was a hamster."
(10:04)

Colbert also explores the backlash against Tesla owners, including instances of hostility and vandalism, painting a picture of a brand in disarray.

Political Satire: Trump's Intervention

The discussion shifts to Donald Trump's involvement in the Tesla boycott, with Colbert lampooning Trump's efforts to salvage the faltering brand:

"Trump personally fought the Tesla boycott today. He had him line up five Teslas in the White House driveway so Trump and Elon could shoot a car commercial on government property."
(09:39)

Colbert sarcastically praises Trump's commitment, further emphasizing the absurdity of the situation.

Public Health and RFK Jr.'s Misconceptions

Transitioning from economic issues, Colbert addresses RFK Jr.'s misguided statements linking a measles outbreak to poor diet:

"RFK Jr. described vaccination as a personal choice. Yes, public health is every man for himself."
(20:05)

He debunks these claims with factual information about measles transmission and vaccination efficacy, ridiculing the misinformation spread by public figures.

Interview with Nathan Lane

Reunion and Personal Anecdotes

Nathan Lane, the guest of the episode, joins Colbert to discuss his latest projects and reminisce about past experiences. Their friendly banter sets a warm tone for the interview:

"It's always a little odd to run into a big time talk show host like yourself in the real world, you know?"
(16:11)

Discussing Broadway and Acting

Lane shares heartfelt memories of working with the legendary Gene Hackman on The Birdcage, highlighting Hackman's versatility and brilliance:

"He could do comedy or drama beautifully. And he was such a smart actor."
(19:18)

He recounts a specific scene where he and Hackman dance and sing together, emphasizing the camaraderie and professional respect they shared.

Promotion of "Mid Century Modern" Sitcom

A major focus of the interview is Lane's new sitcom, Mid Century Modern, set to premiere on Hulu. Colbert engages Lane in promoting the show, eliciting humorous and enthusiastic responses:

"March 28, all 10 episodes drop. As the kids say, same time. Yes, it's created by the man who created Will and Grace, David Cohan and Max Muchnik."
(25:00)

Lane describes the show as a contemporary take on the "Gay Golden Girls," focusing on a group of older gay men forming a chosen family, providing insight into the show's themes and characters.

Humorous Exchanges and Behind-the-Scenes Insights

Throughout the interview, Colbert and Lane share witty exchanges that offer a glimpse into their rapport and behind-the-scenes moments:

"Matt Bomer smells like the unattainable. Like the fresh baked cookies in first class when you're riding in coach."
(26:32)

These light-hearted moments add depth to the conversation, making the summary engaging and relatable.

Conclusion and Final Remarks

Colbert wraps up the episode by reiterating the premiere date of Mid Century Modern and encouraging listeners to watch the show:

"Mid century modern premieres March 28 on Hulu. It's Nathan Lane, everybody."
(28:04)

He also promotes additional content available on The Late Show YouTube channel, inviting listeners to engage further with the show's offerings.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Stephen Colbert (00:52):
  "Yesterday, the Dow slipped on Trump's tariffs and fell down an elevator shaft... the stock market has lost $4 trillion in value, and experts now say the risk of a recession is 40%."

• Nathan Lane (16:11):
  "It's always a little odd to run into a big time talk show host like yourself in the real world, you know?"

• Stephen Colbert (06:36):
  "Yesterday alone, Musk lost more than $16 billion. Come on. Wow."

• Nathan Lane (19:18):
  "He could do comedy or drama beautifully. And he was such a smart actor."

• Stephen Colbert (25:00):
  "March 28, all 10 episodes drop. As the kids say, same time."

---

Final Thoughts

This episode of The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert masterfully blends sharp political and economic satire with engaging celebrity interviews. Stephen Colbert's dynamic hosting, combined with Nathan Lane's charm and humor, provides listeners with both insightful commentary and delightful entertainment. The discussion spans serious topics like the economy and public health misinformation while interweaving light-hearted moments and promotions for upcoming television projects. This balanced approach ensures that the episode remains informative, entertaining, and accessible to both regular listeners and newcomers alike.

Transcript

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[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah, sure thing.

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[Stephen Colbert]

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[Stephen Colbert]

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[Stephen Colbert]

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[Stephen Colbert]

Welcome one and all in here, out there, all around the world to the Late Show. I'm your host, Stephen Colbert. Folks, I know, I know things seem like they're spinning out of control right now, but I want to reassure you that everything is going to be okay. I want to, but I can't because I'm not that good of a liar. All right? By the way, great haircut. Sometimes bangs are too long. Yesterday, the Dow slipped on Trump's tariffs and fell down an elevator shaft. And today, it kept bonking its head on the way down, plunging more than 400 points in the last three weeks. In total, the stock market has lost $4 trillion in value, and experts now say the risk of a recession is 40%. And you can tell that even Fox News is taking that seriously because they're already lying about it.

[Nathan Lane]

It would be Biden's recession.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, Maria, Maria, Maria. That excuse is getting harder and harder to make you going in the bathroom. You may want to give it a minute. Joe Biden was in there about eight weeks ago. And the Dow, the Dow may not bounce back anytime soon because Trump's trade war with Canada keeps getting worse. Here's one of the problems. 85% of the electricity we import into the United States comes from Canada. And last night, in response to Trump's tariff threats, Ontario announced a 25% tax increase on electricity exports to the US and that's a shame, because Canadian electricity is clean energy. It's powered by pure natural beaver in a big wheel. Obviously, that's made up. Obviously, sometimes it's a moose. Obviously, Trump is not pleased with this, so this morning, he posted this message based on Ontario, Canada, placing a 25% tariff on electricity coming into the United States. I'm going to stop you right there, okay? Why did he put quotes around electricity? They are taxing. No, folks, they're taxing the electricity that powers my phone that I use to talk to my beloved family. So now he's threatening to take Canadian tariffs to 50% in response. And all this economic chaos has got to be a shock to MAGA voters, because during the whole campaign, every rally, Trump made this promise.

[Donald Trump]

Starting on day one, we will end inflation and make America affordable again.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes, Day one. Make America affordable again. Or ma. And soon. And soon. That is the sound you'll make when you open your electric bill. So now the White House is scrambling to convince the American people that bad economic news is actually just part of the plan. One White House aide said, it's hard to rip the band aid off without getting some blood everywhere. You know, things are on the right track when your explanation involves the phrase blood everywhere. And I'm no doctor, and not to quibble, but if there's blood shooting out, maybe it's not time to rip the band aid off. Maybe it's time to put on a second band aid or call me crazy, or maybe bring in somebody who knows how to fix the old blood hole instead of trusting the guy with a hat that says make America blood everywhere. Well, there is a silver lining on the implosion of the world economy. It's bad for Elon Musk, too. Yesterday. There you go. That is not great for sales. Wow. Yesterday alone, Musk lost more than $16 billion. Come on. Wow. Wow. To put that in perspective, that's more than some people make in a year. For the losses yesterday, Musk blamed activists and Ukrainian hackers, then shrugged it all off with a Monty Python reference saying, always look on the bright side of life. Ha ha. Good one, Heinrich Giggler. I will. I will respond with a Monty Python quote of my own. I fart in your gender direction. Your mother was a hamster. Here's the thing. This downturn didn't start just yesterday because Tesla stock has plummeted 50% since December. And there's a good reason for that. It's a phenomenon economists call Everybody hates that guy.

[Nathan Lane]

So. So.

[Stephen Colbert]

They'Ve turned on Elon so much that people have begun protesting Tesla owners. As one of them, who later sold her car, explained, two weeks ago, I was called a Nazi in the parking lot at KROGER I came home and told my husband, that's it. I'm done. Look, you should never call someone a Nazi in the parking lot at Kroger unless they don't put their shopping cart back in the cart corral. Okay? You're just gonna leave it right there in an otherwise perfect parking spot? Why don't you just invade Poland? Barbara, cnn. Remember them? CNN found one Tesla owner whose grubby cybertruck has been a magnet for graffiti. Steven Minick, who's owned his cybertruck since last April, caught this on camera.

[Advertiser]

People came up and used their finger.

[Stephen Colbert]

And drew male fallacies all over. Yes, it was covered in male fallacies. Things like, people want to hear me play guitar at. And women love my Reservoir Dogs poster. Male fallacies. Yeah, he might have meant fallacies. He might. I don't know. He might have met fallacies. To protect themselves, some Tesla owners are rebranding their cars, outfitting them with logos from cooler cars, like this Tesla Model 3 with an Audi A5 badge on it. This kind of. This brand thing used to be something people used to do to make their crappy cars look more expensive. It's why in the early 2000s, nobody could tell that I didn't drive a Lamborghini. There's also been a huge surge in bumper stickers that say things like, I bought this before Elon went crazy. And the slightly less popular I bought this after Elon went crazy. But in my defense, I don't really follow the news. Anybody want to go see a Diddy concert? Kanye's going to be there. A lot of. So Elon is hurting, but Trump's got his back. The President posted this morning that the left has conspired to illegally and collusively boycott Tesla. How do you illegally boycott something? Buying things buying. I don't. I got something. Buying things is optional. That's why when you walk into a West Elm, they don't lock the door and say, you want out. Then buy a fat candle with three wicks in it. Or five rattan balls in a wicker basket designed to give you splinters. You want to know how to clean it? You can't. $80 or I'm calling the cops. Trump personally fought the Tesla boycott today. He had him line up five Teslas in the White House driveway so Trump and Elon could shoot a car commercial on government property.

[Donald Trump]

Wow.

[Stephen Colbert]

Thank goodness. Other side.

[Donald Trump]

That's beautiful. This is a different panel than I've had. Everything's computer.

[Stephen Colbert]

You're right, Mr. President. Everything is computer, which is Also the name of the Russian knockoff of the Matrix. In the end, Trump purchased a Tesla Model S. But there's a catch.

[Donald Trump]

I'm going to buy one.

[Stephen Colbert]

Now.

[Donald Trump]

Here's the bad news. I'm not allowed to drive because I haven't driven a car in a long time and I love to drive cars, but I'm going to have it at the White House and I'm going to let my staff use it. I'm going to let people at the place use it.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. I just hope he warns the people at the place that everything is computer. Of course, all of this. All of this was to shore up Elon's fading brand. And Trump almost got the name right.

[Donald Trump]

I love Tesla.

[Stephen Colbert]

All of that. All of that. And you end it with I love Tesla. But you know what? It's an honest mistake. He just mixed up the two words most associated with Elon. Musk, Tesla and Hitler. While Musk. While Musk has been a great disappointment. Trump is surrounded by some qualified, experienced advisors like Health and Human Services Secretary and talking hamstake. RFK Jr RFK Jr gave an interview to address the growing measles outbreak that started in West Texas and has so far infected over 200 people in 15 states. And he really laid on the stupid thick by linking the outbreak to poor diet. You can't get measles by eating garbage 24 hours a day. You know how I know that I don't have measles? To be clear, the reason people get measles is because they catch it from other people who have measles. The virus is so contagious that if one person has it, up to nine out of 10 people nearby will become infected. So really it's not measles. But RFK Jr. Claimed that the current outbreak has been made worse by malnutrition, saying West Texas is kind of a food desert. Maybe so, but that's not causing the measles. Those are two separate issues. Honey, I know I cheated on you, but you have to understand, West Texas is a food desert. By the way, we actually do have something science provides, something proven to stop measles. It's a vaccine. But in his interview. But in his interview, RFK Jr. Described vaccination as a personal choice. Yes, public health is every man for himself. That's why those signs on the highway say, don't drink and drive unless it's your birthday week. Go off, queen. We got a great show for you tonight coming up. Nathan Lane.

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[Stephen Colbert]

The most original musical ever is now streaming on Paramount plus and just giving.

[Nathan Lane]

The people what they want.

[Stephen Colbert]

From the director of the Greatest Showman, Better Man. Absolutely sizz from start to finish. What are you gonna say? I want the world to see who I really am. It's wildly inventive and deliriously entertaining.

[Advertiser]

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[Stephen Colbert]

Nothing. It's only the biggest event in history. Better man now streaming on Paramount plus. Rated R. Welcome back friends and neighbors. Ladies and gentlemen, here we are on Broadway and my first guest tonight is a ton and Emmy award winning actor. You know from the Producers, only Murders in the Building and of course the Birdcage. He now stars in the new sitcom Mid Century Modern. Please welcome back to the Late Show, Nathan Lane. Wow Maestro.

[Nathan Lane]

How lovely.

[Stephen Colbert]

Welcome, welcome Back to the Broadway stage.

[Nathan Lane]

Stephen.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Nathan Lane]

This may be the backstage double espresso martini talking, but I'm very excited to be here.

[Stephen Colbert]

I'm so excited to have you.

[Nathan Lane]

It's been two years since I.

[Stephen Colbert]

Too long. Two years.

[Nathan Lane]

And you look fantastic.

[Stephen Colbert]

Thank you. But we have seen each other since the last time you were here.

[Nathan Lane]

Yes, we did.

[Stephen Colbert]

We were Both at the SNL 50th anniversary thing a couple of weeks back. Do you remember where we ran into each other?

[Nathan Lane]

Well, you know, first of all, it's always a little odd to run into a big time talk show host like yourself in the real world, you know?

[Stephen Colbert]

Exactly.

[Nathan Lane]

It's like seeing your teacher at the supermarket.

[Stephen Colbert]

Right, Exactly.

[Nathan Lane]

You think, you know. Oh, they buy food too.

[Stephen Colbert]

Right, Exactly.

[Nathan Lane]

So it was a star studded affair.

[Stephen Colbert]

And even on the entire.

[Nathan Lane]

Unbelievable. And even the men's room was celebrity packed.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes, exactly.

[Nathan Lane]

Although I was surprised to see Rudy Giuliani in there. He was the bathroom attendant, but still.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. Anyway, guys, gotta pay some bills.

[Nathan Lane]

Gotta pay some. And when I walked in, there was only one available urinal and it was right next to you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Nathan Lane]

And I believe it was Freud who said, there are no accidents. It was either Freud or one of the Kardashians. So I situated, I seated myself next to you and I said, this is how I'd like to do all of my interviews from now on.

[Stephen Colbert]

CBS would not allow it tonight, unfortunately.

[Nathan Lane]

And then when we go to commercial, we just flush. We could call it the Late Show Unzipped.

[Stephen Colbert]

I saw you in there and I saw. Right after you left, I saw Bobby De Niro in there.

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, that was where the party was. All the best people were, had small bladders.

[Stephen Colbert]

I've never hosted. I've never hosted SNL. You hosted?

[Nathan Lane]

Yes, back in the 90s when I was hot for 20 minutes.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes. What was that like?

[Nathan Lane]

I'm a member of the exclusive One Timers Club.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Nathan Lane]

And I'll tell you that One Timers Club is a lot bigger than the Five Timers Club.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Nathan Lane]

Because the One Timers Club doesn't like to get together and meet that often because, well, frankly, Steven Seagal is in it.

[Stephen Colbert]

Did Seagal host?

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, sure. He's infamous. Infamous at his hosting.

[Stephen Colbert]

Wow.

[Nathan Lane]

Yes. Anyway, that's why I was asked. And then of course, the brilliant John Mulaney asked if I would be part of that musical sketch. So I was thrilled and honored to be a part of such a historic night.

[Stephen Colbert]

What was your night like when you actually hosted? Like, who was the musical guest?

[Nathan Lane]

Metallica was really? Who else? You know, we have the same fan base.

[Stephen Colbert]

Speaking of legends, Speaking of legends, this is something I'm very, very jealous of, especially right now, is that you had a chance to work with the great Gene Hackman. Here you are, there you are in the birdcage, together. Amazing. What a cast. What a cast of people. You have said that he was your favorite actor. What did you love about Hackman?

[Nathan Lane]

I think I told him every morning he was my favorite actor. And when we were shooting that scene, that dinner scene, so we were all at a table for a whole week. So every morning I would tell him he was my favorite actor. And I would say, tell me about the conversation. Tell me about Scarecrow, you and Pacino. And he would go, scarecrow. You liked Scarecrow? He was like Spencer Tracy. You couldn't catch him acting. He could do comedy or drama beautifully. And he was such a smart actor, such a. And such a. Just, you know, it was the thrill of a lifetime to get to work with him.

[Stephen Colbert]

What was the scene like? Was he very quick? Was he.

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, well, he was brilliant in comedy. And I do remember we had a scene where he and I are dancing and we're singing. I could have danced all night. And then at the end, we were leaving the scene, we're going into dinner, and I ad libbed. I said, you know, I played Eliza in high school. And he said, I bet you were wonderful. There's kind of a slight flirtation going on there, which was hilarious. He was. No, he was such a. Such one of the greats of the screen. And I was just very fortunate to get to share that time with him.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, a lot has changed since the last time you were here, Nathan. Donald Trump is back in the White House.

[Nathan Lane]

What?

[Stephen Colbert]

I'm so sorry you had to find out this way.

[Nathan Lane]

He's out of town. What happened?

[Stephen Colbert]

And his administration is purging not just the government, but it's also putting its mark on cultural institutions like the Kennedy Center. He's the chairman of the board.

[Nathan Lane]

I know.

[Stephen Colbert]

And he's appointed his buddies to be on the board with him.

[Nathan Lane]

I know.

[Stephen Colbert]

What do you make of what he's doing in terms of what it means for culture?

[Nathan Lane]

Well, I don't want to be a downer, but I think from a historical context, we're totally. I mean, you know, the Kennedy center, he just couldn't keep his teeny, tiny baby hands off it. Who knew Trump could cause more damage to the Kennedy name than RFK Jr. And the new season that he's preparing is very troubling. Like tomorrow night they have a youth choir made up entirely of Elon Musk's children. Because Hamilton canceled its engagement, they're producing Lee Greenwood's all rap musical tribute to Ronald Reagan starring Kanye West. It's called Trickle Down. That's followed by a new production of the Sound of Music told from the point of view of the Nazis.

[Stephen Colbert]

Trust me, Rolf gets his day.

[Nathan Lane]

Trust me, you don't want to hear the list of their favorite things. And then, as if that wasn't odd enough, he just canceled an appearance by the Gay Men's Chorus, which upset a lot of people. Especially. Yes, yes, especially all those conservative Republicans on Grindr. We're at a rally. Shockingly, I was approached about hosting their grand reopening gala. Yeah, they didn't offer to pay me, but they did offer not to send me to Guantanamo Bay. And of course, RFK Jr wants an all unvaccinated audience, which means everybody goes home with a gift bag and Rubella.

[Stephen Colbert]

You don't hear the word rubella much anymore.

[Nathan Lane]

Not as much.

[Stephen Colbert]

That's a funny word.

[Nathan Lane]

It's a good word.

[Stephen Colbert]

We have to take a quick break. We'll be right back with more Nathan Lane, everybody. Stick around.

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[Stephen Colbert]

Hey, everybody.

[Nathan Lane]

Wait.

[Stephen Colbert]

No, don't go anywhere. It's Nathan. It's Nathan Lane. You cannot leave. We've got you on a captive breeding program. You're now starring in a new sitcom.

[Nathan Lane]

I am.

[Stephen Colbert]

Thank you for doing that so we can get more Nathan Lane.

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, well, thank you. Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

It's called. It's on Hulu. It's on the Hulus. The kids call it. It's called Mid Century Modern. Nathan Lane, what is the show and who do you play in it?

[Nathan Lane]

Yes, it is.

[Stephen Colbert]

You sound exhausted before you even start. We don't have to talk about this project.

[Nathan Lane]

No, I. No, I really want to Talk about this. March 28, all 10 episodes drop. As the kids say, same time. Yes, it's created by the man who created Will and Grace, David Cohan and Max Muchnik. Directed by the legendary Jimmy Burroughs. Ryan Murphy is an executive producer.

[Stephen Colbert]

James Burroughs.

[Nathan Lane]

It stars the fantastic Matt Bomer, the sensational Nathan Lee Graham and the late, great Linda Lavin. And it is about. Some people have said it's the Gay Golden Girls, which sounds dog game redundant, but it is about a group of friends, older men who all decide to live together. And they move into my house. I live in Palm Springs with my mother, played by Linda, and I'm a very wealthy manufacturer of women's bras. His name is Bunny Schneiderman. And so it's about men, gay men at different stages of their lives and about chosen family.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, Matt Bomer is absolutely beautiful. He's just a lovely fella.

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, sure, yeah. Oh, the best.

[Stephen Colbert]

Is he that sexy in person?

[Nathan Lane]

Is he that. Oh, sure.

[Stephen Colbert]

Cause some people who are professionally attractive, you meet him in person, they go, ah, they look like a bug.

[Nathan Lane]

No, Matt is. Yes. He's astonishingly, like 24 hours a day.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, really?

[Nathan Lane]

Maybe if you woke him up and he was a little cranky, but no, he's gorgeous. Yes, he smells good, too.

[Stephen Colbert]

Really? What's he smell like?

[Nathan Lane]

Well, what does he smell like? Cool Ranch Doritos. No, no. Matt Bomer smells like the unattainable. Like the fresh baked cookies in first class when you're riding in coach.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, we have a clip here.

[Nathan Lane]

Oh, good.

[Stephen Colbert]

What need we.

[Nathan Lane]

This is my suggesting to my two very old friends that we should all live together. Jim, just hear me out. We're women of a certain age. We're alone. We're miserable.

[Stephen Colbert]

I'm not miserable.

[Nathan Lane]

Trust me. You're miserable. You're too poor for New York. You hate Atlanta.

[Stephen Colbert]

I like Atlanta.

[Nathan Lane]

You hate it. Why don't you know this? You'll both move into.

[Stephen Colbert]

And there it is.

[Nathan Lane]

Bunny Schneiderman's Veni, Veni, vici. Do it fast, do it now, do it wrong. Arthur, this one makes sense. We never see each other.

[Stephen Colbert]

We FaceTime every night.

[Nathan Lane]

I use a filter. It's barely even me. George's death is telling us something. We need each other for comfort, companionship, and to erase our very, very disgusting search histories. Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Mid century modern premieres March 28 on Hulu. It's Nathan Lane, everybody. Thank you for listening to the Late Show Pod show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing. If you want to see more of me, come to The Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.