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Parle tu francais habla sepanol Parle italiano.
Babbel/IXL Advertiser
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Stephen Colbert
It's the Late Show Pod show with Stephen Colbert.
Folks, I may be getting, but I'm still young at heart. Unless you ask my doctor. But I still like to stay on top of all the trends the younglings have got with my youth culture segment that's Geet Dabbin on Fleek Fam, which we've been doing for so long that we had to update the name to that's Gat Spill the Tea Baby Girl Skibidi Toilet, which is now also completely out of date. So we've once again updated the title to Stephen Colbert's segment about youth culture. I'm so tired. Please clap. Thank you. February 14th was Valentine's Day. If you're just learning this now, that's why Cheryl's Been so quiet lately. That's why tonight's youth topic is love and how to find it. Turns out young people can't. According to a new survey, 79% of Gen Z and 80% of millennials feel burned out by dating apps as people are tired of the gamification of their love lives and endless swiping and ghosting. Oh yes, ghosting. Children, gather round for the terrifying tale of Britney in marketing, introducing Brad from accounting to her parents. And then he never texted again. But they still work together. And now it's weird. Couldn't find the switch. Couldn't find the switch. Couldn't find the switch. We'll fix that in post. Right, so apparently online dating is out and in real life is in as they embrace in person activities like wine tastings and run clubs. So dates. They think they invented dates. Young people are going to extremes to meet a partner. Like for instance, some are going to sweetgreen and stealing pre ordered salads in order to manufacture interactions with attractive finance bros whose salad it actually was. That's so unnecessary, ladies. If you want to meet a finance bro, all you have to do is whisper what is bitcoin three times into a fleece vest and Kyle just appears. But they seem happy together. But the most confusing new trend in dating is something called pitch and pair, where presenters sell an audience of single people on their single friends with PowerPoint presentations. Now I'm sad. I don't understand why young people are making this so complicated. Luckily, I have a writer who is young and single. Here to give us her take on the latest dating trends is my writer and certified young person, Eliana Courtler. Eliana, always a pleasure. Won't you do this? Thank you very much.
Eliana Courtler
Hi, Steve.
Stephen Colbert
Hi, Eliana. How is dating?
Eliana Courtler
Well, King, I'm single.
Stephen Colbert
Okay. Have you had any success on the dating apps?
Eliana Courtler
Oh, God, no. It's hell out there. Steve, my dating profile, and this is real, has a picture of me with a sandwich. Do you know what everyone's opening line is? Did you make that sandwich?
Stephen Colbert
Did you make that sandwich?
Eliana Courtler
You cannot ask a woman that, Steve.
Stephen Colbert
Okay, okay. But if you don't like the apps, are you into any of these other new trends like pitch and pair? No way.
Eliana Courtler
I would never have a friend do a PowerPoint presentation about why people should date me.
Stephen Colbert
Because that would be mortifying.
Eliana Courtler
No, because it would be much more effective for me to do it myself next to my famous boss on national television. Take this.
Stephen Colbert
What am I. Hold on, hold on. What am I supposed to do with this?
Eliana Courtler
Click It. This Is Reasons yous'll Love Elliana Courtler By Elliana Courtler Sponsored by Stephen Colbert.
Stephen Colbert
Eliana, Click it.
Eliana Courtler
Ok. Eliana is a total catch. She's kind, she's smart, she's professional and modest. Star wipe. Eliana has fun hobbies like being a team player and always showing up on time and prepared for meetings.
Stephen Colbert
Eliana, your flirting is weirdly corporate.
Eliana Courtler
You just don't get it, old man. Okay, but actually, you know what? You read the next one. Crossfade bitch.
Stephen Colbert
Eliana has a great sense of humor. Specifically in a way that would be an asset to any writer's room. Eliana, Eliana, what is
the chicken?
Eliana, this is clearly you just trying to get a job.
Eliana Courtler
No, no. It's about love. I'm putting myself out there, Steve. Look, I even stole someone's sweetgreen. I have a Kale Caesar for Tina Fey. Does anyone here know Atina Fey?
Stephen Colbert
I'll give it to her. Look, Eliana, I'm disappointed. You haven't taught me anything about young people and dating.
Eliana Courtler
You're right. I'm sorry, Steve. The hot new dating trend for young people is everyone in the world knowing they're losing their job in May and getting texts from their parents. We just had dinner with the Goldsteins. They asked what you're doing next. That's something all young people are experiencing. Can you dig it, King?
Stephen Colbert
Honestly, Yas Queen? Cause yesterday. Yesterday Jon Stewart texted me. We just had dinner with the Goldsteins. They asked what you're doing next. For the hundredth time, John, tell them I have no idea.
Eliana Courtler
I know, Boomer. It's a stressful time.
Stephen Colbert
Yeah.
Eliana Courtler
But you know what can help with that? A big giant sandwich.
Stephen Colbert
Did you make that?
Eliana Courtler
That depends. Does Tina Fey like sandwiches?
Stephen Colbert
My writer, Eliana Quartler, everybody. Thank you for listening to the Late Show POD show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing. If you want to see more of me, come to The Late Show YouTube channel for clips and exclusives.
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Eliana Courtler
I'm really back.
Babbel/IXL Advertiser
School Spirits returns.
Stephen Colbert
Why am I here?
I'm not dead, right?
This place is an absolute death trap. We need to get out of here now.
Babbel/IXL Advertiser
School Spirits New season now streaming only on Paramount plus.
Podcast: The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert
Date: March 29, 2026
Main Theme: A satirical deep dive into emerging dating trends among Gen Z and Millennials, featuring an in-studio PowerPoint experience and cheeky commentary on the state of romance (and employment) for young people.
Stephen Colbert takes listeners through the labyrinth of modern dating trends among younger generations, lampooning both the shifting technology and the social rituals around finding love. With signature wit, he’s joined by his millennial writer Eliana Courtler, who brings both personal anecdotes and plenty of workplace banter to the segment. In classic "youth culture" fashion, the episode delivers playful skepticism and comedic generational gap moments.
Colbert, on youth trends exhaustion:
Colbert, on workplace ghosting:
Eliana, on dating burnout:
Eliana, on why she wouldn’t let a friend pitch her:
Colbert, reading Eliana’s slide:
Eliana, on Gen Z’s real stress:
Colbert, in solidarity:
The episode maintains Colbert’s trademark blend of sharp satire, playful sarcasm, and occasional heartfelt relatability. Eliana’s contributions bring in real-world “young person” texture—equal parts dry, self-effacing, and savagely funny. The banter is fast-paced, poking fun at both workplace tropes and generational divides in love and labor.
For listeners curious about how Gen Z and Millennials are reimagining dating (and surviving workplace anxiety), this episode of The Late Show Pod Show is both a comic roast and a snapshot of true sentiment. PowerPoint love pitches, in-person salad heists, and universal job fears—it's all here, wrapped in Colbert’s signature, self-aware humor.